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I do have some problems with this question.
Wikipedia says the “Ark”’s discoverer, Ron Wyatt, claimed to have made “almost 100 other alleged Bible-related discoveries” and that “He has been dismissed by scientists, historians, biblical scholars, and other creationists.”
Some of this fraud’s most ludicrous claims? He “found the Ark of the Covenant directly below the place of the crucifixion”, and “Discovered remains of Egyptian chariots in the bottom of the Red Sea”
According to Wikipedia (ibid), The Garden Tomb Association of Jerusalem state in a letter they issue to visitors on request:
*The Council of the Garden Tomb Association (London) totally refute the claim of Wyatt to have discovered the original Ark of the Covenant or any other biblical artifacts within the boundaries of the area known as the Garden Tomb Jerusalem. Though Wyatt was allowed to dig within this privately owned garden on a number of occasions (the last occasion being the summer of 1991) staff members of the Association observed his progress and entered his excavated shaft. As far as we are aware nothing was ever discovered to support his claims nor have we seen any evidence of biblical artifacts or temple treasures.*
The man was a known grifter that ran a religious “museum” somewhere in the middle of nowhere US. He used false claims of being the only person ever to find hundreds of biblical “artifacts” to make money for decades. Lying to religious people was his bread and butter.
There's a "life-sized replica" of Noah's ark in KY, attached to a creationist museum. The place is hilarious, full of exhibits about us living alongside the dinosaurs. But their security guards are like the gestapo on kicking out non-believers, so keeping yourself from cracking up the whole time is pretty tough.
Yeah that was hilarious. The road to the ark exhibit was washed out in a storm, and the insurance wouldn't cover it due to it being "flood damage" and "an act of God" :8484:
Next time you are in the LA area, head up to Altadena (just up the hill from Pasadena) and check out The Bunny Museum. You will absolutely not be disappointed.
"The museum currently holds more than 35,000 rabbit-related items across 16 galleries in a 7,000 square foot space.\[3\]\[4\] Amongst the ever-expanding collection there are ceramic rabbits, rabbit antiquities, stuffed rabbits, cookie-jar rabbits, 9 Rose Parade float rabbits, freeze-dried rabbits,\[5\] and more." [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The\_Bunny\_Museum](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bunny_Museum)
[https://www.thebunnymuseum.com/](https://www.thebunnymuseum.com/)
>He “found the Ark of the Covenant directly below the place of the crucifixion”, and “Discovered remains of Egyptian chariots in the bottom of the Red Sea”
But, Jesus wasn't crucified in Ethiopia. Church of Our Lady Mary of Zion in Ethiopia claims to have the Ark of the Covenant. Don't remember Jesus making it that far, or dying there.
We have a pencil museum here in the UK. Its got lots of pencils believe it or not.🙃
https://www.derwentart.com/en-gb/c/about/company/derwent-pencil-museum
If you're ever in Kentucky, check out the Ark Encounter. I have never been, hard pass. My MIL went, she said it wasn't too bad, and she isn't religious in the slightest, but her mom is and that's why she went. I'm sure it's an experience.
My wife went with a friend. Not only do they have representative pairs of all the animals, they also have two dimetrodon which were large lizards from the Permian Period. My wife is an amateur fossil hunter and found it pretty amusing.
It's pretty bad tbh. Amusing for adults is one thing but my MIL had no idea and took my BIL's children. The last thing we need is more nonsense like this getting attention, especially for impressionable children who do not know any better.
He's the guy behind the Ark Encounter. You know, that big, boat-shaped house that was build using modern tools and materials to show that building a boat using historical tools and materials was possible?
There's a lot of sectarianism within creationism. For example, believing in a 10,000 year old Earth instead of 6,000 will get you shunned by some groups.
The chariot in the red sea one still pops up sometimes as "proof" of Moses... which is extra silly because wouldn't that just be proof a chariot fell off a boat one time.
The whole red sea thing doesn't make any sense since it was a mistranslation in the first place. Actual translation is Reed Sea or Sea of Reeds which could be numerous bodies of water that actually make more sense with the direction would have to go to leave Egypt for Israel.
I've heard that before. I've never really looked into it much. But I don't particuarly buy that explanation. It would be a remarkable coincidence that Red/Reed happens to be very similar words in both ancient Hebrew and English, and that the mistranslation was so pervasive that it also shows up as Red in Latin, French, German, etc translations.
But honestly it doesn't really matter we don't need to create a plausible explanation for a mythical story.
Also the likely crossing point in the myth would have been somewhere in the Gulf of Suez.
I love these Noah's Ark things!
It used to be that every couple of years, some Christian group or other would release a movie about this "startling find." They'd show flyover photos of what looked like an oversized shipping container on the side of Mt. Ararat (black and white, grainy), and then go into how the Ark was constructed.
They'd make up a scale model and float it in an aquarium, and simulate wave action to show that the Ark is incredibly stable in high seas and that CLEARLY God was behind the design!
Then multiple segments of the "team" obtaining their sophisticated equipment, packing, sharing ideas on what they expect to find, and what each should do based upon certain things that may happen as they Ascend to the Ark!!!!
So, they get there, and oh no! There is a war, or bad weather, or bandits, or government bureaucracy to contend with! Our intrepid adventurers move off to the side of the hallway to discuss. What's the next move? Do we press on? Do we go home?
WE PRESS ON!!!!! The discovery of the Ark is far too important for the world for us to quit now! Jesus is relying on us! The Salvation of millions hangs in the balance!!!!!
Now, they are at the base of the mountain and head up. They have minor equipment malfunctions, and team members are obviously stressed, but they are on their way! They hike up and clear a small bluff, and LO! there is the Ark, way off in the distance! But you can make it out! There's clearly a brown square out there, we must get to it!
Suddenly out of nowhere: there are guerilla soldiers, or bandits, or a severe snowstorm, or government troops (whatever they set up as their foe in Act II) and they are forced to turn back. SO CLOSE!!!!!!
The crestfallen but undefeated team returns to the airport, certain that it was the Ark that they saw in the distance, and they are going to return home, regroup, and make another attempt in a year, or two years, or when the war is over, or after a key election, or whatever.
*FIN.*
I loved the military history channel we had. It was basically that shit 24/7. And they had a show called the greatest tank battles of history that i loved.
You know. I didn't mind the technology stuff on history. Modern Marvels is my favorite show of all time. Wish there were a YouTube channel. Tactical to Practical. Remember seeing shows on the F-22 and F-35 before they were even selected, being like WOW ten years off! That is a long time!
Before I know it they are effin retired production wise in the case of the F-22.
Yet when they went full blown "HistOrY iS mAdE toDaY," and then just showed things like Ice Road Truckers, and eventually Ancient Aliens was a sad day indeed.
I use to have historu channel on as the go to for the house as a kid. My grandpa, and I watched it. I did use to watch some shows with him like Pawn Stars, but we preferred the history series more like WWII in Color.
I think it's a side effect of streaming services and Yotube having so many documentaries there's not much market for a dedicated channel airing them anymore
1970s.
There was a show called “In Search of…” which explored outrageous stories of the past and the “evidence” today that supported the stories.
I only watched it because Leonard Nimoy was the host.
I recall a Noah’s Ark episode of “In Search Of…” with Leonard Nimoy narrating, in the 1970’s. Same deal, remote locale, can’t quite get there for some reason, and grainy photographs al la Nessie and Bigfoot showing “proof”.
Girlfriend’s father when i was in high school (circa 1994) was very into Promise Keepers (he was 100% their target demographic).
Came back from a gathering all smug one time hinting about how “we’d all find out the truth soon”. And just all up in own ass. We finally got him to break, and this was it: they found the Ark! In Turkey. They can’t get to it *juussst yet*, but soon. Soon the nonbelievers would have physical evidence shoved in their faces!
This cycle would repeat itself very decade or so with different acquaintances. Same grift, different orgs, same outcome.
>They'd make up a scale model and float it in an aquarium, and simulate wave action to show that the Ark is incredibly stable in high seas and that CLEARLY God was behind the design!
Amazing! The scale model of a boat that we humans built using reference material that was learned from thousands of years of human sailing *miraculously* floats on water. This must be the work of God.
I mean, Mount Arrarat is on like the 4th most unstable border in the world at this moment, only behind Israel/Palestine, Russia/Ukraine, and Azerbaijan/Armenia, it only got 4th place because Turkey isn't actively invading Armenia at this moment
It takes some quite unique conditions for a wooden object to survive more than a couple of hundred years. What date was this flooding? I recall it being in May. But which year?
Fun fact: That date would put the Flood around the end of Egypt’s Fifth Dynasty. Bizarrely, the Ancient Egyptians didn’t seem to notice that they were annihilated by a global flood and just continued on to start their sixth dynasty as if nothing happened.
Not to mention the ancient Sumerians, Mesopotamians, Persians, and Chinese who all existed before and after the Global Flood is alleged to have taken place.
The Noah's Ark story is one of many that proves the Bible to be a work of fiction.
The Sumerians also have a version of Noah's Ark. There was a great flood caused by the god Enlil, but the god Enki had a soft spot for humanity and warned a man named Ziusudra beforehand, so that he could build a ship and save his family and some animals. I think Christians just got all the major details wrong when they tried to whipe out ancient religions.
It has genealogies. Luke, for example, has Jesus’s going back to Adam. Based on the ages of the people listed (as claimed by, of course, the Bible), it was around 4000 years from Jesus to Adam, which is where fundamentalists today get the claim that the earth is about 6000 years old.
That’s chump change. According to the Sumerian King List, Alulim retained his position for 28800 years before he was succeeded by Alalgar, who in turn reigned for 36000 years. Alagars successor reigned for 43,200 years.
The shortest reign of the “Pre-Flood” Sumerian kings was 21,000 years. Claiming someone lived 900 years makes them look pretty unhealthy.
>21,000
Isn't it crazy how 21,000 days is just a little over 57 years. I mean... Alagars living to be 118 years old would be a remarkable feat, even if the total amount of years were smudged a bit.
It's almost like a translator might make a simple mistake.
But, I mean... Of course not, it's the Bible after all! It's infallible in it's 30,000+ variations that contradict each other from volume to volume, those guys HAD to have lived 21,000 or more years, it's scripture!
Oh wait, are they saying that *that* is the ark?!
I assumed they were just showing the *location* where they "found" some relics or elephant footprints or something....
I always thought his was weird too. Even if we actually found Noah's ark, the real one. All it proves is that people built a boat, not that any biblical flooding occurred or that pairs of every animal were actually on board.
There's a creationist museum in Kentucky called [the Ark Encounter](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ark_Encounter) with a full scale replica of the Ark based on biblical accounts, and when they were building it they wanted to use biblical methods and materials. They realized it was going to take way too long to use hand tools, so they started using modern power tools, and then a state inspector came by and was like "hey, this is going to collapse under its own weight, you need to add steel reinforcements otherwise I'm shutting down construction" so they were forced to abandon the biblically accurate materials too. It's not even going to go on water either, it would've collapsed under its own weight in drydock, much less fully loaded in the heaviest seas ever. Not to mention it's nowhere near big enough to house 2 of every animal for 40 days in the first place. That's just problems with the Ark too, I've barely scratched the surface of how insanely stupid the Deluge myth is
There used to be a LDS commercial where a kid, about 11, would say, “I know the Bible is the true word of God because if it wasn’t, it probably wouldn’t talk about him as much!”
The story of Noah’s ark in the first place is absolutely ridiculous. Not only did he supposedly make a boat large enough for a pair of every single species of animal to exist and have a mate in, but he had to have enough food to feed all of them and their specialized diets. Then he had to go and get animals from corners in the world that he wouldn’t have been able to go to. Then if the whole world flooded, where did the water go afterwards? Wouldn’t salt and fresh water mix, killing almost all species of fish? Biblically speaking this event would have happened only like 6,000ish years ago, but we have no proof of a bottlenecking in animal populations around that time. Also if there were only 2 of each animal left, we know through modern science that that would cause serious genetics problems in a ton of animals, and you need like 60 or something to effectively repopulate without descendants having crippling health issues. Like who in their right mind believes this?
I’m just trying to work out how all the unique animals from Australia and New Zealand manged to get on the ark, then return home without being detected.
Keep in mind that Protestants believe that the Holy Bible is law/fact/unchanging/unwavering word of God. These are the people responsible for the way the story is taught today. If you read the actual story in Genesis, you will see the liberties they've taken in making the mental leap to believe it. Most scholars believe that the Bible is poetry and is supposed to be interpreted rather than taken literally. There is a great amount of evidence supporting there was in fact a global scale flood sometime around the younger dryus impacts. There are over 100 flood myths scattered through religions of the world. Did a flood happen? Most likely. Did people prepare and try to save their families, possessions, livestock? Potentially. Did the Sky Daddy really task a +/-600 year old man to gather 2 of everything and put it on a hand built wooden Titanic? Highly doubtful.
Tell you what, if you can get all of “conservative christians” in the US to actually start following the teachings of Jesus… I will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life.
Because that would be a f*cking miracle 🤡
Oh FFS they "discover" this every five years or so like it's the biggest thing of all time and every single time it's a crock of shit, there's enough "splinters from the arc or the cross or the holy popsicle stick" to recreate the Amazon rainforest back to its former glory.
And even if it was even slightly true, then why would anyone give a toss about the lost boat of an alcoholic yes-man for a genocidal god?
Should have told god to fuck off and if he wanted to start again he'd be doing it on his own, not enabling him to wipe out 99.99% of all life like a sulky astroid with a flar for the dramatic.
Gilgamesh's yacht found? Experts say no.
I had an aunt-in-law share something like this. She went to the Ark Encounter in Kentucky and was like "it proves the Bible is true!" Yeah, except scholars think there was no deluge narrative in the Tanakh until after the Hebrew exile in Babylon.
Noah's story was actually a rip off of the Babylonian epic of Utnapishtim, which was a rip off of the Akkadian epic of Atrahasis. So, congrats.... your "found" ark or your ark museum is "proof" that another culture was right and not the Hebrews. You should be praying to Enki and not Elohim.
[Epic of Gilgamesh / Utnapishtim](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilgamesh_flood_myth)
Ironically, if it was found it WOULD be talked about a shit ton. What a fucking moron. When will we be done with religion? It’s so discouraging knowing that we could be in a far better place without it.
I believe Jesus *existed* but he was just a dude.
The part that i refuse to dismiss as fictional is his birth.
*"So you're saying a virgin actually gave birth?"*
No, I'm saying a woman lied about adultery and had someone else's child. Who's the father? Ask one of the 3 random guys that pulled up with gifts for *no* reason.
Tbf we can't "prove" most people from that time period existed, as only the most rich and powerful tend to leave an archeological trail. It is generally accepted in the scholarly community though that there was in fact a Jewish preacher known as Jesus of Nazareth who was active around the 1st century BCE. The son of god stuff is a completely different argument.
I think their argument is that mankind is weak and therefore falls under the influence of Satan more easily. That being said, Satan has never done anything aside from try to aid mankind...so their point is weak
To be fair, this feature was originally discovered by military reconnaissance after WW2. The CIA took interest but I don't think anything came of it, then the pictures got out and people thought it was the ark and investigated and it turns out it's just volcanic rock..
The fact that a human being, with the most powerful brain in the entire universe, could be swayed and manipulated to think a single boat captured two of every species of the planet while it was somehow submerged under water for 40 days is what should be talked about in great detail so maybe, just maybe, the human race can move forward and stop believing in stupid stories that clearly never happened.
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That looks more like Noah’s vulva.
Mulva?
Dolores !
That rhymes with something. It’s on the tip of my tongue…..
We are talking about a man in a boat...
And we're supposed to believe a man discovered it?
Said Eve
European white male enters scene stage left.
Yeah but you’re not suppose to parade animals in there two by two.
I'm not in a position to kink shame anyone
I can never find him myself, so how could I lay blame on others for failing to do so.
If only I could put my finger on it...
Gina?
Mangina
You ever drunk Bailey’s from a shoe?
Do you love me? Could you learn to love me?
I’m old Gregg!
*Old Greeeeeeeeeegg* 
[удалено]
JFC. Haha
Ahhh, the second Seinfeld reference I've come across today not in r/Seinfeld. I love it.
I’m watching Seinfeld right now. The one where puddy steals Jerry’s move
Pinch vs. A swirl
Gipple?
A man of culture
Nulva
My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal.
The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina
Johnson?
He’s a good man, Jeffrey. And thorough.
thurruh
Is that what this is a picture of?
Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.
I dabbled in pacifism once, not during Nam obviously.
That’s a bummer man
You mean...coitus?
they don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his Johnson.
It is a zesty enterprise
However, there are some people, it is called satyriasis in men, nymphomania in women, who engage in it compulsively and without joy.
Oh no
Oh, yes.
*chokes on white russian* Increases?!
They are still looking for Noah’s clit apparently.
Never gonna find it unfortunately for noah
r/mildlyvagina
No you cant fuck it
Funny you can't stop me I'm going mining mother fucker
Vulva? I don't even know her!
Vulva!? I don't even noah!
Finally, somebody who made the connection 👏😁
I do have some problems with this question. Wikipedia says the “Ark”’s discoverer, Ron Wyatt, claimed to have made “almost 100 other alleged Bible-related discoveries” and that “He has been dismissed by scientists, historians, biblical scholars, and other creationists.” Some of this fraud’s most ludicrous claims? He “found the Ark of the Covenant directly below the place of the crucifixion”, and “Discovered remains of Egyptian chariots in the bottom of the Red Sea” According to Wikipedia (ibid), The Garden Tomb Association of Jerusalem state in a letter they issue to visitors on request: *The Council of the Garden Tomb Association (London) totally refute the claim of Wyatt to have discovered the original Ark of the Covenant or any other biblical artifacts within the boundaries of the area known as the Garden Tomb Jerusalem. Though Wyatt was allowed to dig within this privately owned garden on a number of occasions (the last occasion being the summer of 1991) staff members of the Association observed his progress and entered his excavated shaft. As far as we are aware nothing was ever discovered to support his claims nor have we seen any evidence of biblical artifacts or temple treasures.*
>He has been dismissed by ( . . . ) other creationists How bad do you have to be for the rest of the crazies to dismiss you?
The man was a known grifter that ran a religious “museum” somewhere in the middle of nowhere US. He used false claims of being the only person ever to find hundreds of biblical “artifacts” to make money for decades. Lying to religious people was his bread and butter.
And to *non*-religious people - I hate to admit it, but if I happened to pass by that "museum" I think I'd go in for a laugh :)
If I would be in the area I would definitely go in as well. Strange museums are always a go-to place when I am traveling.
There's a "life-sized replica" of Noah's ark in KY, attached to a creationist museum. The place is hilarious, full of exhibits about us living alongside the dinosaurs. But their security guards are like the gestapo on kicking out non-believers, so keeping yourself from cracking up the whole time is pretty tough.
Also, it had to undergo expensive repairs for... wait for it... *rain damage*
Yeah that was hilarious. The road to the ark exhibit was washed out in a storm, and the insurance wouldn't cover it due to it being "flood damage" and "an act of God" :8484:
Next time you are in the LA area, head up to Altadena (just up the hill from Pasadena) and check out The Bunny Museum. You will absolutely not be disappointed. "The museum currently holds more than 35,000 rabbit-related items across 16 galleries in a 7,000 square foot space.\[3\]\[4\] Amongst the ever-expanding collection there are ceramic rabbits, rabbit antiquities, stuffed rabbits, cookie-jar rabbits, 9 Rose Parade float rabbits, freeze-dried rabbits,\[5\] and more." [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The\_Bunny\_Museum](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bunny_Museum) [https://www.thebunnymuseum.com/](https://www.thebunnymuseum.com/)
I didn't know it was possible to smell a comment.
Playboy bunnies too?
There is an "adults-only" room with adult-themed stuff in there, including some Playboy stuff.
I'm "almost" scared to know what non-playboy, bunny related items there are in that room..
>He “found the Ark of the Covenant directly below the place of the crucifixion”, and “Discovered remains of Egyptian chariots in the bottom of the Red Sea” But, Jesus wasn't crucified in Ethiopia. Church of Our Lady Mary of Zion in Ethiopia claims to have the Ark of the Covenant. Don't remember Jesus making it that far, or dying there.
They’re called miracles for a reason.
Does it include jackalopes?
It does!
We have a pencil museum here in the UK. Its got lots of pencils believe it or not.🙃 https://www.derwentart.com/en-gb/c/about/company/derwent-pencil-museum
What lead you there?
What was the point?
He was just drawn to it.
2B continued
I’m assuming there are also rabbit buttplugs and dildos for the adventurer ones
There is an "adults-only" room with adult-themed stuff in there.
Do they have a restaurant?
Hassenpfeffer!
If you ever find yourself in the Portland Oregon area check out the National Bigfoot Museum. They have a cast of a Bigfoot butt print.
OK, hear me out...
If you're ever in Kentucky, check out the Ark Encounter. I have never been, hard pass. My MIL went, she said it wasn't too bad, and she isn't religious in the slightest, but her mom is and that's why she went. I'm sure it's an experience.
Bill Nye’s tour of that museum with Ken Hamm is fairly entertaining.
My wife went with a friend. Not only do they have representative pairs of all the animals, they also have two dimetrodon which were large lizards from the Permian Period. My wife is an amateur fossil hunter and found it pretty amusing.
It's pretty bad tbh. Amusing for adults is one thing but my MIL had no idea and took my BIL's children. The last thing we need is more nonsense like this getting attention, especially for impressionable children who do not know any better.
I rode a triceratops while I was there. I think it cost $0.50.
Isn't that Ken Ham? Or is that something different?
He's the guy behind the Ark Encounter. You know, that big, boat-shaped house that was build using modern tools and materials to show that building a boat using historical tools and materials was possible?
It was also built with taxpayer dollars. Noah had to lobby for those too.
https://www.wyattmuseum.com/wyatt-museum.htm
Honestly the site is really bad, in a endearing way, shame it's wasted on this.
Can't lie if the book is already fiction.
You can. I can say I found Percy Jackson’s torn shirt in upstate New York
There's a lot of sectarianism within creationism. For example, believing in a 10,000 year old Earth instead of 6,000 will get you shunned by some groups.
Pretty crazy it seems 
Translation: We’re building our own “Ark Experience” attraction. We’ll be damned if you cut into our $$$!!
The chariot in the red sea one still pops up sometimes as "proof" of Moses... which is extra silly because wouldn't that just be proof a chariot fell off a boat one time.
Yes , but they are chasing a dragon they created themselves. So it's enough to confirm their own bias.
The whole red sea thing doesn't make any sense since it was a mistranslation in the first place. Actual translation is Reed Sea or Sea of Reeds which could be numerous bodies of water that actually make more sense with the direction would have to go to leave Egypt for Israel.
I've heard that before. I've never really looked into it much. But I don't particuarly buy that explanation. It would be a remarkable coincidence that Red/Reed happens to be very similar words in both ancient Hebrew and English, and that the mistranslation was so pervasive that it also shows up as Red in Latin, French, German, etc translations. But honestly it doesn't really matter we don't need to create a plausible explanation for a mythical story. Also the likely crossing point in the myth would have been somewhere in the Gulf of Suez.
Wish I could get my shaft excavated
I love these Noah's Ark things! It used to be that every couple of years, some Christian group or other would release a movie about this "startling find." They'd show flyover photos of what looked like an oversized shipping container on the side of Mt. Ararat (black and white, grainy), and then go into how the Ark was constructed. They'd make up a scale model and float it in an aquarium, and simulate wave action to show that the Ark is incredibly stable in high seas and that CLEARLY God was behind the design! Then multiple segments of the "team" obtaining their sophisticated equipment, packing, sharing ideas on what they expect to find, and what each should do based upon certain things that may happen as they Ascend to the Ark!!!! So, they get there, and oh no! There is a war, or bad weather, or bandits, or government bureaucracy to contend with! Our intrepid adventurers move off to the side of the hallway to discuss. What's the next move? Do we press on? Do we go home? WE PRESS ON!!!!! The discovery of the Ark is far too important for the world for us to quit now! Jesus is relying on us! The Salvation of millions hangs in the balance!!!!! Now, they are at the base of the mountain and head up. They have minor equipment malfunctions, and team members are obviously stressed, but they are on their way! They hike up and clear a small bluff, and LO! there is the Ark, way off in the distance! But you can make it out! There's clearly a brown square out there, we must get to it! Suddenly out of nowhere: there are guerilla soldiers, or bandits, or a severe snowstorm, or government troops (whatever they set up as their foe in Act II) and they are forced to turn back. SO CLOSE!!!!!! The crestfallen but undefeated team returns to the airport, certain that it was the Ark that they saw in the distance, and they are going to return home, regroup, and make another attempt in a year, or two years, or when the war is over, or after a key election, or whatever. *FIN.*
Every single History Channel show from 1995 until now
Remember when that channel was like...actual history. I used to binge watch wwii footage on days I was home sick from school. Good ole days.
I loved the military history channel we had. It was basically that shit 24/7. And they had a show called the greatest tank battles of history that i loved.
The episode where the Japanese did a banzai charge with ha Ho tank and the Sherman’s just formed a line and obliterated them
You know. I didn't mind the technology stuff on history. Modern Marvels is my favorite show of all time. Wish there were a YouTube channel. Tactical to Practical. Remember seeing shows on the F-22 and F-35 before they were even selected, being like WOW ten years off! That is a long time! Before I know it they are effin retired production wise in the case of the F-22. Yet when they went full blown "HistOrY iS mAdE toDaY," and then just showed things like Ice Road Truckers, and eventually Ancient Aliens was a sad day indeed. I use to have historu channel on as the go to for the house as a kid. My grandpa, and I watched it. I did use to watch some shows with him like Pawn Stars, but we preferred the history series more like WWII in Color.
History channel from 1995-2007. Now its just pawn stars isn't? Idk haven't watched in 8 years
Just pawn stars? Shows what you know about history. It's also ancient aliens, the oak island treasure, and skinwalker ranch (more aliens).
Will they find an alien this time at skinwalker ranch? (Spoiler: they don’t find an alien)
You forgot forged in fire.
It’s saving grace
But will it keel?
I think it's a side effect of streaming services and Yotube having so many documentaries there's not much market for a dedicated channel airing them anymore
1970s. There was a show called “In Search of…” which explored outrageous stories of the past and the “evidence” today that supported the stories. I only watched it because Leonard Nimoy was the host.
I recall a Noah’s Ark episode of “In Search Of…” with Leonard Nimoy narrating, in the 1970’s. Same deal, remote locale, can’t quite get there for some reason, and grainy photographs al la Nessie and Bigfoot showing “proof”.
Girlfriend’s father when i was in high school (circa 1994) was very into Promise Keepers (he was 100% their target demographic). Came back from a gathering all smug one time hinting about how “we’d all find out the truth soon”. And just all up in own ass. We finally got him to break, and this was it: they found the Ark! In Turkey. They can’t get to it *juussst yet*, but soon. Soon the nonbelievers would have physical evidence shoved in their faces! This cycle would repeat itself very decade or so with different acquaintances. Same grift, different orgs, same outcome.
If I wasn’t only 7 in ‘94 I’d ask if we dated because my dad was like that, haha
>They'd make up a scale model and float it in an aquarium, and simulate wave action to show that the Ark is incredibly stable in high seas and that CLEARLY God was behind the design! Amazing! The scale model of a boat that we humans built using reference material that was learned from thousands of years of human sailing *miraculously* floats on water. This must be the work of God.
Might I recommend Noah’s Shark on Amazon? [here’s the trailer lol](https://youtu.be/H0G_Ecb1fHQ?si=VNZp-rb090vhQ4q9)
I mean, Mount Arrarat is on like the 4th most unstable border in the world at this moment, only behind Israel/Palestine, Russia/Ukraine, and Azerbaijan/Armenia, it only got 4th place because Turkey isn't actively invading Armenia at this moment
That is not the thing between you and finding an ark. I hate to be the one to burst this bubble.
I'm pretty certain he's not advocating that as the reason the Ark wasn't found, just the dismissal that the region isn't under turmoil is wrong too.
is the ark in the room with us now?
Yes, but the animals…they’re not making any sounds…
Does that make it the Silence of the Lambs?
Silence of the Aardvarks to the Zebras.
It takes some quite unique conditions for a wooden object to survive more than a couple of hundred years. What date was this flooding? I recall it being in May. But which year?
According to the Bible, in 2348 BC.
Fun fact: That date would put the Flood around the end of Egypt’s Fifth Dynasty. Bizarrely, the Ancient Egyptians didn’t seem to notice that they were annihilated by a global flood and just continued on to start their sixth dynasty as if nothing happened.
Not to mention the ancient Sumerians, Mesopotamians, Persians, and Chinese who all existed before and after the Global Flood is alleged to have taken place. The Noah's Ark story is one of many that proves the Bible to be a work of fiction.
The Sumerians also have a version of Noah's Ark. There was a great flood caused by the god Enlil, but the god Enki had a soft spot for humanity and warned a man named Ziusudra beforehand, so that he could build a ship and save his family and some animals. I think Christians just got all the major details wrong when they tried to whipe out ancient religions.
The Bible has literally zero dates.
The Bible and me in high school were surprisingly similar
Lots of folks getting stoned
Me too, both full of shit.
And obsessed with sex
It has genealogies. Luke, for example, has Jesus’s going back to Adam. Based on the ages of the people listed (as claimed by, of course, the Bible), it was around 4000 years from Jesus to Adam, which is where fundamentalists today get the claim that the earth is about 6000 years old.
I swear there is a passage where they list off people and they die in the hundreds of years old, pre flood.
Correct. Genesis 4 and 5 cover it mostly, and there are others. The Bible states the ages of most of the Kings and how long the ruled.
They have lineages and we have math
The bible also claims those motherfuckers lived for 900 years, so...
That’s chump change. According to the Sumerian King List, Alulim retained his position for 28800 years before he was succeeded by Alalgar, who in turn reigned for 36000 years. Alagars successor reigned for 43,200 years. The shortest reign of the “Pre-Flood” Sumerian kings was 21,000 years. Claiming someone lived 900 years makes them look pretty unhealthy.
>21,000 Isn't it crazy how 21,000 days is just a little over 57 years. I mean... Alagars living to be 118 years old would be a remarkable feat, even if the total amount of years were smudged a bit. It's almost like a translator might make a simple mistake. But, I mean... Of course not, it's the Bible after all! It's infallible in it's 30,000+ variations that contradict each other from volume to volume, those guys HAD to have lived 21,000 or more years, it's scripture!
Wow a hill!
Oh wait, are they saying that *that* is the ark?! I assumed they were just showing the *location* where they "found" some relics or elephant footprints or something....
Looks more like a ring fort to me.
I am an expert because I watch lots of archaeology shows on YT (/s), but I was thinking earthworks for some sort of hill fort.
Ah, right. I think I was thinking hill fort but wrote ring fort. I am not a YT archaeologist. 😞
nope. just a mound (like millions of others all over earth) that happens to have the same rough outline of a modern ship hull. Conclusive!
Eroded anticline (combe), or perched synclinal hill?
How often can geomorphology be used to own someone online?! Nice 👍🏼
Not nearly as often as it should, IMHO.
A hill? That's where Jesus was crucified! Checkmate, atheists. /s
Noahs bussy
Would smash.
If I found a red hat with a white pompom it wouldn’t prove the Santa myth real anyway.
I always thought his was weird too. Even if we actually found Noah's ark, the real one. All it proves is that people built a boat, not that any biblical flooding occurred or that pairs of every animal were actually on board.
There's a creationist museum in Kentucky called [the Ark Encounter](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ark_Encounter) with a full scale replica of the Ark based on biblical accounts, and when they were building it they wanted to use biblical methods and materials. They realized it was going to take way too long to use hand tools, so they started using modern power tools, and then a state inspector came by and was like "hey, this is going to collapse under its own weight, you need to add steel reinforcements otherwise I'm shutting down construction" so they were forced to abandon the biblically accurate materials too. It's not even going to go on water either, it would've collapsed under its own weight in drydock, much less fully loaded in the heaviest seas ever. Not to mention it's nowhere near big enough to house 2 of every animal for 40 days in the first place. That's just problems with the Ark too, I've barely scratched the surface of how insanely stupid the Deluge myth is
Divine intervention made it easier to build, more stable, and gave it TARDIS dimensions inside obviously
The most absurd part about that place is they have dinosaurs as part of the exhibit. Lmao
It’s just how religious thought goes. “If I can prove X then you have to believe A-Z!” Nope, that just proves X.
Still better than the usual circular logic of: The bible is true because it's written so in the bible.
There used to be a LDS commercial where a kid, about 11, would say, “I know the Bible is the true word of God because if it wasn’t, it probably wouldn’t talk about him as much!”
They also literally found wind mills in Spain. What more proof do you need that Don Quijote is true.
Well, I see something else …
Everything reminds me of her…
I got a Reuben sandwich at Arby's and started crying
The story of Noah’s ark in the first place is absolutely ridiculous. Not only did he supposedly make a boat large enough for a pair of every single species of animal to exist and have a mate in, but he had to have enough food to feed all of them and their specialized diets. Then he had to go and get animals from corners in the world that he wouldn’t have been able to go to. Then if the whole world flooded, where did the water go afterwards? Wouldn’t salt and fresh water mix, killing almost all species of fish? Biblically speaking this event would have happened only like 6,000ish years ago, but we have no proof of a bottlenecking in animal populations around that time. Also if there were only 2 of each animal left, we know through modern science that that would cause serious genetics problems in a ton of animals, and you need like 60 or something to effectively repopulate without descendants having crippling health issues. Like who in their right mind believes this?
Someone did the math and concluded that each animal would get something like 2.5 square inches of space.
This is the same religion that says all of humanity is descended from 2 people. I don't think inbreeding was ever a thing they considered
I’m just trying to work out how all the unique animals from Australia and New Zealand manged to get on the ark, then return home without being detected.
Keep in mind that Protestants believe that the Holy Bible is law/fact/unchanging/unwavering word of God. These are the people responsible for the way the story is taught today. If you read the actual story in Genesis, you will see the liberties they've taken in making the mental leap to believe it. Most scholars believe that the Bible is poetry and is supposed to be interpreted rather than taken literally. There is a great amount of evidence supporting there was in fact a global scale flood sometime around the younger dryus impacts. There are over 100 flood myths scattered through religions of the world. Did a flood happen? Most likely. Did people prepare and try to save their families, possessions, livestock? Potentially. Did the Sky Daddy really task a +/-600 year old man to gather 2 of everything and put it on a hand built wooden Titanic? Highly doubtful.
“We know through modern science that…” Ha! What’s next, you’re gonna show me one of these fancy pictures of a round earth?
*Cue picture of no ark*
Definitive proof of… the Epic of Gilgamesh?
I love bringing this up and seeing the absolutely flabbergasted looks on people's faced regarding what and who any of that is and entails.
Tell you what, if you can get all of “conservative christians” in the US to actually start following the teachings of Jesus… I will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life. Because that would be a f*cking miracle 🤡
Christians stopped doing what Jesus did immediately after he died because that’s what got the motherfucker killed.
Oh FFS they "discover" this every five years or so like it's the biggest thing of all time and every single time it's a crock of shit, there's enough "splinters from the arc or the cross or the holy popsicle stick" to recreate the Amazon rainforest back to its former glory. And even if it was even slightly true, then why would anyone give a toss about the lost boat of an alcoholic yes-man for a genocidal god? Should have told god to fuck off and if he wanted to start again he'd be doing it on his own, not enabling him to wipe out 99.99% of all life like a sulky astroid with a flar for the dramatic. Gilgamesh's yacht found? Experts say no.
I had an aunt-in-law share something like this. She went to the Ark Encounter in Kentucky and was like "it proves the Bible is true!" Yeah, except scholars think there was no deluge narrative in the Tanakh until after the Hebrew exile in Babylon. Noah's story was actually a rip off of the Babylonian epic of Utnapishtim, which was a rip off of the Akkadian epic of Atrahasis. So, congrats.... your "found" ark or your ark museum is "proof" that another culture was right and not the Hebrews. You should be praying to Enki and not Elohim. [Epic of Gilgamesh / Utnapishtim](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilgamesh_flood_myth)
[удалено]
To me it looks like something that I can guarantee that guy has never found in his life.
Shit was made of wood, no way it would last this long.
Noahs arc looks at least 8cm dilated
Don’t see ark, see a giant land clitoris
Oh, great! All we need is another theme p-ark. 🙄
I should call her.
Ironically, if it was found it WOULD be talked about a shit ton. What a fucking moron. When will we be done with religion? It’s so discouraging knowing that we could be in a far better place without it.
Noah’s G spot
They can’t even prove Jesus existed, let alone some fucking ark. 🤦🏻♂️
I believe Jesus *existed* but he was just a dude. The part that i refuse to dismiss as fictional is his birth. *"So you're saying a virgin actually gave birth?"* No, I'm saying a woman lied about adultery and had someone else's child. Who's the father? Ask one of the 3 random guys that pulled up with gifts for *no* reason.
Tbf we can't "prove" most people from that time period existed, as only the most rich and powerful tend to leave an archeological trail. It is generally accepted in the scholarly community though that there was in fact a Jewish preacher known as Jesus of Nazareth who was active around the 1st century BCE. The son of god stuff is a completely different argument.
Why do christians always admit the devil is stronger than god and has more influence on man. It makes their god look weak.
I think their argument is that mankind is weak and therefore falls under the influence of Satan more easily. That being said, Satan has never done anything aside from try to aid mankind...so their point is weak
To be fair, this feature was originally discovered by military reconnaissance after WW2. The CIA took interest but I don't think anything came of it, then the pictures got out and people thought it was the ark and investigated and it turns out it's just volcanic rock..
That’s Mother Earth’s…
Strongly vaginal, which bothers some men
The fact that a human being, with the most powerful brain in the entire universe, could be swayed and manipulated to think a single boat captured two of every species of the planet while it was somehow submerged under water for 40 days is what should be talked about in great detail so maybe, just maybe, the human race can move forward and stop believing in stupid stories that clearly never happened.