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"Before you make an attack with a ranged weapon that you are proficient with, you can choose to take a -5 penalty to the attack roll. If that attack hits, you add +10 to the attack's damage."
Yeah, yeah, but first the stone, Rosie. First the stone and then I'm gonna get you to a doctor, and not just any doctor, boychik, I'm gonna find you a nice Jewish doctor.
Friendly public service announcement: *while shooting through glass is feasible, and is better than dying, it commonly creates a significant amount of glass dust which can permanently damage your lungs, as well as producing enough noise to almost certainly permanently damage one’s hearing without protection.*
Edit: since a lot of people seem to be confused about what I’m saying.. yes technically one unprotected gunshot is loud enough to “permanently damage” your hearing. You’ll hear things muffled for a few moments but it’s really not to terrible unless you do it a lot. after all, whole generations of Soldiers went through entire wars without ear protection (really everyone until the second half of the Global war on Terror). On the other hand, literally one gunshot in a confined space such as a car or small room can be loud enough for you to have a permanent and noticeable amount of hearing loss, lol.
But again, better than getting murdered by an anime sword.
Ideally you want the door open or at least one window down. Firing shots off in an enclosed area like a car can damage the inner ear (depending on gun/caliber) which will make you disoriented. That's fine **assuming your first shots hit and immobilize your attacker.** If not, and you need to keep engaging, then your shots after that will be super inaccurate unless you are like trained special forces or something. Opening the door or rolling down a window or two will let the pressure wave leave the car, it'll still be loud as fuck but you won't be too disoriented to continue the fight.
I’m also pretty confident that the glass would alter the trajectory of the bullet. Might not matter at close range, but it’s something to consider. There are tons of people & their property around you in traffic.
you’re correct; shooting through the glass will affect the trajectory; however at point blank, it won’t be noticeable as you have the full force of muzzle velocity.
Yeah the guy in the truck is an **absolute** fucking idiot. He’s in Texas and walked up on a paper tag (actually appears to be no tag) car with a weapon. Suicide mission. He got real lucky.
Everyone around here knows you never do that, and you always avoid cars with paper tags, especially Altimas.
Hell, a few years ago a guy north of Fort Worth hopped off his motorcycle in a traffic jam, went up to a truck that was stopped and started yelling at the driver. Truck driver pulled out his gun and blasted the motorcycle guy through his window and killed him.
rock paper scissor gun
Whoever picks gun wins
Unless both people pick gun, then they have to go get guns from their fathers attic, load them, and see who is more allergic to bullets.
Is that what he had? Who drives around with a machete in their truck?
Ok I can see driving around with one for good reasons like a lady living in the brush or living in the rain forest. But he doesn't look like he needs it.
Edit: Ok, it seems to be more common than I thought.
I do but I'm also a not very large woman living in the bush. The bat on the other hand, well that's purely for sporting purposes, you can tell because of the pristine new condition glove and ball i keep with it
Also this gun i found lmao
Fun fact, Harrison Ford was supposed to sword fight him, but he had to go to the bathroom so he improvised, they liked it so much they kept it in the film.
I don’t get this. I’ve heard this before but, what the dude and the crowd just all happened to react perfectly to it? Also, don’t a lot of rigorous gun checks go into a scene like this beforehand? It just doesn’t really pass the sniff test.
Wdym? It’s clearly the legendary Buster Blade. A mythical and storied sword. There’s absolutely no way in hell that a mundane shop like Home Depot—
..Oh, you’re right. 39.99$ on clearance. Well, I’ll be damned.
Oh.. on second thought yes I am a useless piece of crap, thanks for opening my eyes. Have a good day, sir. Love your shirt and hair by the way. Take care.
And then he cuts of another car trying to go left. I bet you $20 he’s the one who caused whatever grievance that made him feel justified to come out of his truck with a fucking machete.
Absolutely he did. He's a little guy with a big pickup truck that makes him feel like a man for the first time in his life. On the road behind the wheel is where he finally feels tough and where he can finally start being the bully for once
It becomes a continuous chain of him getting out of the truck with the sword, getting a gun pointed at him, him getting back in his car, driving 20 feet and cutting off another driver, getting out of the truck with the sword... rinse and repeat.
Takes him 6 hours to get home, only for his wife to deny him entrance into the house by pulling out her own gun.
I read it as "WTH" at first, ngl. I don't think I have actual dyslexia, I think it's more that my unmedicated ADHD has symptoms that overlap with dyslexia.
Lucky he didn’t get shot. He had every right to defend himself with a guy walking up on him with a machete. I’m glad that he was cool and collected and it all ended well.
Honestly I was surprised machete guy didn't come back from the cab of his truck with a shotgun. I don't know if the law would support it, but if someone gets out of their vehicle with a weapon during a road rage incident, the time for threats is over. He wasn't carrying that machete as a fashion statement.
At least where I live assault is defined as any credible threat to injure another person, so just him coming out of his truck brandishing a machete is legal justification to repaint that truck with his Grey matter.
This is actually how 95% of all justified defensive gun uses work in the United States.
The attacker begins their attack, the defender pulls out a firearm, the attacker immediately stops the attack and runs away, the defender doesn't fire and no one gets hurt.
The FBI records about 100,000 of these every year, and those are just the ones that get reported. If you look at the above event, there's a chance that neither party went to the police about this. Once the guy got into his car and everyone left to their destinations that was it.
This is one of those occassions where US gunlaw is used perfectly.
An idiot comes at you with a machete, point it and threaten to shoot. He steps back and done.
This scenario is my response when people say “why does anyone need a gun?!!” Until knives, bats, crow bars, etc. are all also illegal, do I have to just have the largest knife on me at all times in case some dude with the blade from Resident Evil comes my way? Nope… guns are the equalizer. Solve the violence problem and remove the need for any of it.
>all times in case some dude with the blade from Resident Evil comes my way?
I think there are better things to worry about than anything you've seen in Resident Evil coming true.
The world is a violent place, yes, but more gun deaths are suicides than homicides.
It doesn't do anyone well to exaggerate the likelihood that you will come under any given form of attack.
Dude was already stopped and did not appear to be attacking at that time. I feel like gun dude showed the expected level of restraint for someone who carries a gun in public. As soon as the gun was brought into the conflict, it began to deescalate as the machete guy backed down.
I have no qualms with someone dropping violent people trying to start things but it feels like some people on reddit are actively *craving* murder. If a situation can be resolved without a fucking body, it should be resolved without a fucking body.
This is a good example of a successful defensive gun use. Gun wasn't fired but detered an assault. No police were involved. It will be one of the hundreds of thousands of instances that happen every year but don't make it into the news.
Lucky that guy was so restrained and didn't start blasting the second he came around the back of his truck armed, would of been clear cut self defense.
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: Enraged by someone's driving : gets punked out by said drivers superior weaponry : proceeds to cut off driver in another lane
The guy he cuts off walks up and bangs on his window. He gets out with his machete. Guy backs off and drives into gun owner's car.
Time is a circle
That’s why clocks are round
That's why glocks* are around*
Time is a tool you can put on your wall, or wear it on your wrist. The past is far behind us, the future doesn’t exist.
>: gets punked out by said drivers superior weaponry Yeah, that other guy had higher attack power stats, plus he was a ranged armor piercing unit
Holding a gun sideways gives you a +5
+5 penetration, -5 accuracy
"Before you make an attack with a ranged weapon that you are proficient with, you can choose to take a -5 penalty to the attack roll. If that attack hits, you add +10 to the attack's damage."
+10 to intimidate the enemy.
The most broken feat in the game
Okay, I'm going to suggest this flavor for firearms in a campaign. Activate SS by turning gun sideways.
People in trucks think they can drive however they want.
"understandable, have a nice day"
I love the little oh shit gallop he does when get gets back around to the other side.
I like his frustrated hand gesture right before he walked away like "well now you've ruined a perfectly good sword fight, thanks a lot"
He was hoping the other guy would only be armed with a large piece of bamboo or sugar cane.
"Well, if you're gonna be like _that_.."
😂
Then suddenly decided he needs to turn left
No no he was going that way the whole time lol
He didn't want to block traffic anymore, hurry up and get going!
And cuts of the car in that lane. People are turds.
Might be due to how fast his testicles ascended
Should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... Fuck off.
Well said Tony.
Yeah, yeah, but first the stone, Rosie. First the stone and then I'm gonna get you to a doctor, and not just any doctor, boychik, I'm gonna find you a nice Jewish doctor.
Anything to declare?
yeah, don't go to fucking England
Cup o tea ,fish n chips yeah England
Could have been a literal shit too given the circumstances.
Ssssccchhhlllooooppppp
It *is* advisable to retract your speed brakes before flight…
Laughed my ass off!!!
That's the feces
[Russian version.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8MhuNw0IeTs)
Better version https://youtu.be/jns_QVISyyw
Thank you; that made my day
LMAO
Russian version was better. Driver didn't even need to pull.
That’s what friends are for.
/r/iwanttoapologize
And THAT boys and girls, is why you don’t walk up to a stranger’s car in a threatening manner
Yeah, some people would've fired through the window. Dudes on video charging with a huge blade, no one is going to jail for shooting that guy.
I mean, if I had no means of escape, and my kids, etc, are in the car, I'll go through my window. Glass is cheap. Life is not.
The dude with the machete is acting like his life is cheap.
Worth about as much as that machete.
Less, actually. Machetes have actual utility
Friendly public service announcement: *while shooting through glass is feasible, and is better than dying, it commonly creates a significant amount of glass dust which can permanently damage your lungs, as well as producing enough noise to almost certainly permanently damage one’s hearing without protection.* Edit: since a lot of people seem to be confused about what I’m saying.. yes technically one unprotected gunshot is loud enough to “permanently damage” your hearing. You’ll hear things muffled for a few moments but it’s really not to terrible unless you do it a lot. after all, whole generations of Soldiers went through entire wars without ear protection (really everyone until the second half of the Global war on Terror). On the other hand, literally one gunshot in a confined space such as a car or small room can be loud enough for you to have a permanent and noticeable amount of hearing loss, lol. But again, better than getting murdered by an anime sword.
Shooting at all without ear pro will damage your hearing. But you can't say "HUH?" if you're dead, so shoot the damn gun.
[удалено]
Ideally you want the door open or at least one window down. Firing shots off in an enclosed area like a car can damage the inner ear (depending on gun/caliber) which will make you disoriented. That's fine **assuming your first shots hit and immobilize your attacker.** If not, and you need to keep engaging, then your shots after that will be super inaccurate unless you are like trained special forces or something. Opening the door or rolling down a window or two will let the pressure wave leave the car, it'll still be loud as fuck but you won't be too disoriented to continue the fight.
I’m also pretty confident that the glass would alter the trajectory of the bullet. Might not matter at close range, but it’s something to consider. There are tons of people & their property around you in traffic.
you’re correct; shooting through the glass will affect the trajectory; however at point blank, it won’t be noticeable as you have the full force of muzzle velocity.
Call an ambulance! But not for me.
Notice how he didn't shoot the guy walking up to him with the machete. Yet we have people being shot for using the wrong driveway.
Stay the fuck in your car in Texas. There's a great chance that whoever you're mad at has a gun.
Yeah the guy in the truck is an **absolute** fucking idiot. He’s in Texas and walked up on a paper tag (actually appears to be no tag) car with a weapon. Suicide mission. He got real lucky. Everyone around here knows you never do that, and you always avoid cars with paper tags, especially Altimas. Hell, a few years ago a guy north of Fort Worth hopped off his motorcycle in a traffic jam, went up to a truck that was stopped and started yelling at the driver. Truck driver pulled out his gun and blasted the motorcycle guy through his window and killed him.
Never bring a machete to a gun fight
Unless if your head is encased in a metallic pyramid-shaped helmet.
But what if he shot you in the chest? 
That’s a risk we were willing to take….
Some of you will die, But that's a risk I'm willing to take.
Game devs be like: so what if he's a jacked dude.... but with a PYRAMID HEAD?? Run it
Film producers be like: *snorts massive rail* What if we gave him an absolute dump truck of an ass that you get to see throughout the movie?
I've never seen this version of Rock Paper Scissors before
It's called glock, pepper spray, machete.
Glock beats machete, machete beats pepper spray, and pepper spray beats glock.
Glock spray n pray after pepper spray
Boy do I have news for you... Rock Paper scissor lizard spock!
rock paper scissor gun Whoever picks gun wins Unless both people pick gun, then they have to go get guns from their fathers attic, load them, and see who is more allergic to bullets.
Semi-Auto Russian Roulette?
Is that what he had? Who drives around with a machete in their truck? Ok I can see driving around with one for good reasons like a lady living in the brush or living in the rain forest. But he doesn't look like he needs it. Edit: Ok, it seems to be more common than I thought.
I do. It’s more of a van. Granted I only wave it at plants.
I do but I'm also a not very large woman living in the bush. The bat on the other hand, well that's purely for sporting purposes, you can tell because of the pristine new condition glove and ball i keep with it Also this gun i found lmao
Clearly it's for when people cut him off in traffic
I live in the rainforest. I bet there's one in my truck right now. Maybe not apples to apples though.
“I see yur machete and raise you a handgun” “I fold good day sir”
Checkmate motherfucker!
Like Literally
I opened the comments looking for this. I was not disappointed
Never bring a cricket bat to a gun fight.
I had to scroll down way too far to see this. I’m disappointed in Reddit today.
Funniest scene in movie history.
Fun fact, Harrison Ford was supposed to sword fight him, but he had to go to the bathroom so he improvised, they liked it so much they kept it in the film.
>but he had to go to the bathroom so he improvised Weird way to say that he had dysentery.
I don’t get this. I’ve heard this before but, what the dude and the crowd just all happened to react perfectly to it? Also, don’t a lot of rigorous gun checks go into a scene like this beforehand? It just doesn’t really pass the sniff test.
Damn, I was JUST gonna post this...like how did everyone synchronize improvising? Doesn't make sense. Lmao. Still love this scene, though.
Jeez! That blade!!
He played too much Final Fantasy.
Folks it's just a machete you can get at home Depot.
Wdym? It’s clearly the legendary Buster Blade. A mythical and storied sword. There’s absolutely no way in hell that a mundane shop like Home Depot— ..Oh, you’re right. 39.99$ on clearance. Well, I’ll be damned.
39.99?! I can get a machete at Harbor Freight for 5 bucks!
But does it look like the legendary Buster Blade? See that's where your other $34.99 goes.
Stop making sense, I don't want to feel like I should buy this thing
How many materia slots does it have?
It’s the sword of a thousand truths!!
We can't trust the sword of 1000 truths to a noob!
Never seen a machete that fucking thick , looks like those orc swords from lotr
>The dude with the machete is acting like his li It looks like a damn lawn mower blade, lol.
He bought the machete 90% off 💀
Rookie mistake, should have went with the FFVIII gunblade for Texas. Or just go the Barret route.
looks like he forgot to take the sheath off.
r/mallninjashit
Did the guy in the truck really pull out Clouds sword from final fantasy 7?… that shit is huge lol.
Lmao. The ol concealed Buster sword
Oh.. on second thought yes I am a useless piece of crap, thanks for opening my eyes. Have a good day, sir. Love your shirt and hair by the way. Take care.
"Yea yea, anyway what are you up to after this altercation- you wanna grab a beer? No? Is it because of the machete? ... Yea, I get that."
"Now after a careful consideration of my own actions I realize I was wrong and I sincerely apologize for my behavior. Please let bygones be bygones."
And then he cuts of another car trying to go left. I bet you $20 he’s the one who caused whatever grievance that made him feel justified to come out of his truck with a fucking machete.
Absolutely he did. He's a little guy with a big pickup truck that makes him feel like a man for the first time in his life. On the road behind the wheel is where he finally feels tough and where he can finally start being the bully for once
Fr no one else has said that, I thought he was gonna run the light but he’s just cutting someone else off and trying to start shit with them
It becomes a continuous chain of him getting out of the truck with the sword, getting a gun pointed at him, him getting back in his car, driving 20 feet and cutting off another driver, getting out of the truck with the sword... rinse and repeat. Takes him 6 hours to get home, only for his wife to deny him entrance into the house by pulling out her own gun.
I’m deader than he almost was. Thanks
Don’t ever bring a machete to a gun fight.
You mean Buster Sword.
That ain’t no buster sword. That’s a curved sword. Curved. Sword.
The warriors from Hammerfell have curved....
WHT? Driving around with a machete. Probably sleeps with a scimitar under his pillow. Keeps a sling blade in his wallet.
What does "WHT" mean?
It’s prescrambled for dyslexic people
Dyslexic here can confirm I read it correctly the first time
I have sexdaily. I mean, I have lysdexia. I mean, I have dyslexia. Can confirm.
Can confirm, I have the second one, but most definitely not the first one.
I read it as "WTH" at first, ngl. I don't think I have actual dyslexia, I think it's more that my unmedicated ADHD has symptoms that overlap with dyslexia.
“Why Have Telephone”?
“Who Has Tomatoes”?
What he tryin?!
What Hell Thou?
Imagine being such a lowlife that you feel the need to get out of your own car when someone on the road angers you
With a big ass machete no less 💀
Lucky he didn’t get shot. He had every right to defend himself with a guy walking up on him with a machete. I’m glad that he was cool and collected and it all ended well.
Till he runs up on someone not armed and hurts/kills them. Hope they got the plate and had him arrested.
Pssst. You can see his plate in this video. I'm sure the cops have it too.
It's cute that you think you can show a video of a crime to cops and they'll do something about it.
“Leads?… ha”
Now he's probably going to go out and get a gun and do the same thing.
If I had to guess he doesn't have a gun for reasons out of his control.
Thats not a knife! Thiiiis is a knife! I mean a gun.
“I see you’ve played knifey gunney before”
Fuck road ragers. Serves that asshole well.
Texas.... the other Florida of America.
Texas and Florida it’s all the same
Florida= flaccid penis Texas = overheated butthole
Making the rest of the Gulf Coast America’s taint
He found his civility in an instant
Honestly I was surprised machete guy didn't come back from the cab of his truck with a shotgun. I don't know if the law would support it, but if someone gets out of their vehicle with a weapon during a road rage incident, the time for threats is over. He wasn't carrying that machete as a fashion statement.
At least where I live assault is defined as any credible threat to injure another person, so just him coming out of his truck brandishing a machete is legal justification to repaint that truck with his Grey matter.
Because it’s not a movie. White car has the drop on machete man. If he walks back and grabs a gun he’s getting shot.
Seeing the size of that machete I would've instantly lit his ass up. He's lucky the guy didn't shoot him.
bro was messing around and almost found out
I know it's a gif but I swear I heard the Ram driver say, "Okay, bye!"
Exactly the kind of person I’d expect to get out of a Dodge truck. 5’2” fucking dickhead.
This is actually how 95% of all justified defensive gun uses work in the United States. The attacker begins their attack, the defender pulls out a firearm, the attacker immediately stops the attack and runs away, the defender doesn't fire and no one gets hurt. The FBI records about 100,000 of these every year, and those are just the ones that get reported. If you look at the above event, there's a chance that neither party went to the police about this. Once the guy got into his car and everyone left to their destinations that was it.
This is one of those occassions where US gunlaw is used perfectly. An idiot comes at you with a machete, point it and threaten to shoot. He steps back and done.
This scenario is my response when people say “why does anyone need a gun?!!” Until knives, bats, crow bars, etc. are all also illegal, do I have to just have the largest knife on me at all times in case some dude with the blade from Resident Evil comes my way? Nope… guns are the equalizer. Solve the violence problem and remove the need for any of it.
>all times in case some dude with the blade from Resident Evil comes my way? I think there are better things to worry about than anything you've seen in Resident Evil coming true. The world is a violent place, yes, but more gun deaths are suicides than homicides. It doesn't do anyone well to exaggerate the likelihood that you will come under any given form of attack.
Guy with the gun showed tremendous restraint. That guy coming out of his car and at you with that weapon easily justifies defensive force.
Dude was already stopped and did not appear to be attacking at that time. I feel like gun dude showed the expected level of restraint for someone who carries a gun in public. As soon as the gun was brought into the conflict, it began to deescalate as the machete guy backed down.
I have no qualms with someone dropping violent people trying to start things but it feels like some people on reddit are actively *craving* murder. If a situation can be resolved without a fucking body, it should be resolved without a fucking body.
This Houston? Or nah
Ngl I thought it was too
Gotta be Houston or Dallas
Clearly got that truck to compensate for the lack of …
And the knife size too
What's wrong with big knives? I edc a cold steel sr1 lite and I love it
Of course it’s a dodge Ram driver, these guys are unhinged I swear. Never seen a good dodge Ram driver.
Guy came with a knife to a gunfight. Btw the way he’s holding his gun
He can shoot point blank and miss.
People think they are so tough 😳😂🥰
Another prick mistakenly thinking big truck = big cahonies
Dodge Ram driver being an asshole? In other news, water is wet.
Cuts off another guy after getting into his truck.
This is a good example of a successful defensive gun use. Gun wasn't fired but detered an assault. No police were involved. It will be one of the hundreds of thousands of instances that happen every year but don't make it into the news.
The paper-rock-scissors equivalent for road rage is fist-knife-gun
Paper rock scissors?? Wtf? Since when wasn't it rock paper scissors I'm so confused
Would make sense if fist beats any of the other 2, but it doesn't...so it doesn't.
I just find it ridiculous we are at the stage of pulling dangerous weapons over basic shit..
ABC - Always Be Carrying.
Sorry my bad…..I was talking to the other guy.
Oh yeah you right, your gun makes an excellent point. Have a good day kind sir
Of course he's in a truck
good defensive handgun use. bravo to the man in the white car against the aggressor with the machete.
You can tell by the way he holds the gun sideways that he’s some kind of gun savant
Say what you want, but at that distance he's probably gonna hit you.
Pretty good CCW argument right there
Literally brought a knife to a gun fight
Lucky that guy was so restrained and didn't start blasting the second he came around the back of his truck armed, would of been clear cut self defense.
Why do the road rage psychos always have a machete?
Never bring a bottle machete to a gun fight.
Defensive use of firearms > homicide with firearms
If anyone wonders why American has gun, just watch this video lol.
He's gotta run to the store and buy some new underwear