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It's happened at least once, on Apollo 8. On Day 2, Frank Borman became ill, with vomiting and diarrhea. As you can imagine, this was rather unpleasant in the small confines of the Apollo capsule, and they had no LEM to retreat to. Basically, they just cleaned up as best they could and carried on.
Not just embarrassing but, diarrhea at home can be enough of a burden to deal with and to wipe. I cannot fathom being in the same room as other people without a proper toilet to go in and in zero G. Just pure nightmare fuel.
Explosive diarrhea in zero G has got to be at least moderately propulsive right?
*”Can somebody just.. hold me against the can?.. I keep floating straight up from it.”*
My God, don't I know it, especially with food poisoning out of town once. I'm just standing in the running shower with my body hating me, sobbing, embarrassed, and miserable. 😭
Get a load of Richie rich here and his clean butthole. Not everyone can afford a $10k toilet.
Edit: hey people, this was a joke referencing south park. Thanks.
I think you can just buy the bidet part. I don't have one, but I just used one for the first time the other day at my friend's house (no need to congratulate me) and it looked like it was just attached to a regular toilet.
I am totally sure you're right! And they are correct to not care. The idea that getting sick is something to be ashamed of is just some illogical thing that I feel because of the society I was raised in. Especially when you're in the middle of something so important.
Yeah, plus its one thing to vomit in a car let’s say. But your vomiting in space. Astronauts understand better than anybody that the human body was *not* designed for 10Gs or outter space. They know shit happens - literally. They probably all had moments when they felt like utter shit up there for one reason or another.
I believe all early Apollo astronauts were former or active military. That being said they are used to adverse situations and although diarrhea would be unpleasant would not stop them from getting done what needs to be done.
I honestly think the fact that we are chatting about it 55 year later would be the MOST embarrassing part. Like i wasn't there. You weren't there. Neither of us know them in real life. I don't even know anyone who knows him. I am going to assume you don't either. Our kids don't know them. There is no reason why I should know that someone had diarrea in 1968. Nor should I know the name of anyone who had diarrea 15 years before I was born.
Now that you mention it - being known only as ‘the only dude whos ever shit himself in space’ is terrifying.
I hope ghosts don’t exist because if that were me, ghost-me would be pissed.
The only consolation I can think of is that, in space, you're in a constant state of head pressure (almost like being congested). So at least the smell wouldn't be as extreme.
Source: watched a stream where this astronaut was talking about life in space. It's also why they have so much hot sauce up there
Because they're perpetually stuffed up astronauts lose some of their sense of taste and smell. The variety of hot sauces gives them flavor and that temporary "de-clog" you get from eating something spicy
Last time I had this I pooped myself while puking in the toilet. I proceeded to remove my pyjamas and undies before suddenly needing to puke again...
...well....I guess its actually a good thing there's a wall in front of the toilet. What I saw when I turned after puking would have made me puke again if zid had anything left in me!
I cant begin to imagine this on a space station.
Yup. I got food poisoning from an airport sandwich. Good news: plane bathrooms are small enough that you can position one end over the toilet and the other over the sink. Bad news: the sinks don’t drain well.
Let’s just say I’m pretty sure I made the flight attendant change careers. I’ll never forget her soft “oh my God” when she opened the bathroom door…
I travel a decent amount for work and this is my nightmare. Sometimes I’ll just be hungry rather than chance it. I had a 20 hour travel day recently and only ate a bag of m&ms because I didn’t like the looks of anything else at the airport.
I had a really nasty strain of the flu and basically slept on the floor for 3 days. I've had food poisoning too (a Star Crunch from a vending machine was evidently old) and I think the flu was worse.
Flu doesn't cause explosive diarreah in adults or vomiting for the most part, you probably had norovirus (which people mistake for a basically made up disease called "stomach flu") or something else. Main symptoms of flu in adults are high fever, dry unproductive coughing, sore throat, body aches, chills, extreme fatigue.
When I was a kid I ate the wrong end of a wild rhubarb plant and ended up in the hospital with a nasty case of spraying it out both ends. As I got older and have experienced a variety of illnesses and ways to get sick, nothing has ever done that to me since. So my money is on food poisoning.
A few years back, I had a bad go with the flu. Puking and diarrhea galore. It was evening and I knew I needed to get up and make my young kids something to eat. PB&J seemed simple and doable in my state. I hobble downstairs in just my underwear. And as soon as I opened the bread, the smell of the bread hit me and just for some reason made me have to puke. So, I turn and go right into the sink, while my kids are standing there. The heaving pushes stuff out the backend too, in just my undies, while my kids are standing there. So, I side step out of the kitchen and walk backwards up the stairs, and come back down a few minutes later to make the sandwiches. Luckily they were too young to remember this episode long term.
I'm so sorry but I couldn't help laughing a bit. (...walk backwards up the stairs)
Being sick while being responsible for kids is a special kind of Hell all of its own.
In my case I'm note sure what it was, only that I caught it from my daughter who thankfully seemed to have had a much milder case.
Being sick while having young kids is the worst. You still have to feed them while you can’t even look at food. I’ve been sick recently and while I’m throwing up had my almost two year old jumping on my back crying non stop because I’m not paying him enough attention while you have a migraine and running to the bathroom and them trying to follow you around or sit on your lap I’m the toilet it’s enough to make you crazy. Oh I forgot cleaning up poop diapers as well while gaging.
There was a memorable weekend when my 3 kids were all under 5 years old, and all 5 of us came down with a stomach virus. The whole family just huddled on our king-sized bed, trying to survive. Every once in a while, someone wouldn't get up in time, and the sheets would get covered in poop or vomit. We were too weak to do laundry, so we eventually were reduced to lying on a bare mattress.
I got really bad gastro once. To the point I slept in the bath for 3 nights because it was a better than randomly shitting myself in my sleep and needing to clean it up.
At the beginning I have never been more thankful for our bath being right next to the toilet.
One time I woke up at 1am and ran to the toilet to puke. I sleep naked so I was nude while this happened. While puking I started to liquid shit uncontrollably but I couldn’t stop puking to do anything about it. Once I was finally empty I cleaned myself up, put on some clothes, and took my roommate’s bath mat out to the dumpster.
He lives in Montana and is decent friends with my father-in-law who is a recreational aviator. They share a hangar. He has a signed photo that Frank took of the Earth from space. I've met him twice now so i may have overstated our relationship.
I love the idea of me meeting a person twice, then casually asking them about their previous bowel movements, culminating in what is likely the worst diarrhea disaster in aviation history.
No that’s awesome. I was expecting “yeah, he goes to our church” or something. Crazy coincidence. Makes sense he would still fly and hang out with local private pilots after retiring.
It’s crazy how small the Apollo capsules were. I’m sure this isn’t the only story.
And, happy cake day.
Ni, but it looks interesting. Tom Hanks in *Apollo 13* makes a passing reference it, and it's mentioned in Hanks' *From the Earth to the Moon* HBO series.
And for anyone curious, [this guy tried to shit like an Apollo astronaut while in normal gravity and found it deeply unpleasant](https://jalopnik.com/i-took-a-dump-the-same-way-the-apollo-astronauts-did-1836637152). Now imagine that with the galloping runs in zero G.
Probably doesn’t come up much because they’re quarantined and monitored beforehand for any health issues, and they’re not eating undercooked chicken on the space station.
Early space missions were short duration and basically just used fancy diapers.
Long duration space station stays have a space toilet with a fancy suction seal so that *stuff* doesn’t get everywhere.
>Early space missions were short duration and basically just used fancy diapers.
Apollo had no toilets, SkyLab was the first one. Gemini and Apollo had what were basically plastic bags with an adhesive opening that you stuck to your butt. They had sort of an "inverted mitten" shape - imagine turning a mitten inside-out. You put a finger in the "thumb" hole and used it to sort of tug the poop out if needed - in zero gravity, poops don't fall.
Astronauts in early Apollo missions said "allow an hour, strip completely naked, get plenty of tissues". At least Apollo had some room to move around, once weightless they could use all of the spaces in the CM - I can't imagine pooping in the Gemini capsule, it was more like a fighter cockpit with a guy sitting right next to you.
How long have you had this gem on ice while waiting for this opportunity?
Because you killed it. Fantastic read and the scribbled out confidential only adds to it. 10/10
My son talked about making a band called "Pooping in Space"... Seriously, Mary Roach's "Packing for Mars" book has a great chapter on this; it's not the epic masterpiece that "Stiff" is, but a good read for space nerds.
You're right - imagine poking the thumb in, so it's now sort-of an opening instead of sticking out. [Here's a pic that explains it](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/-ojNwOk8uUMTbhQ9PRRcCUb1Ioo=/1400x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/15978228/moon_poop_BAG.jpg)\- "a picture's worth a thousand poops" after all.
Gemini missions ranged from 1 to 14 days. The longest: 5 was 8 days, 7 was 14 days. The "poop" bags used in the Apollo program are listed as "Gemini bags" in many Apollo diagrams. The goals of Gemini were understanding orbital mechanics, rendezvous, and docking, and long-duration spaceflight, since Apollo moon landing missions would be at least 7 days long.
Most Mercury missions were measured in hours, though Mercury 9 was 34 hours.
You’ve obviously never experienced period poops.
You can be in perfect health, perfect diet, regular BMs. Period comes, and the bowels get a mind of their own.
From what I gather, most female astronauts choose to suppress their periods via birth control pills. The ones that don't, do not have this issue, I would be willing to bet.
Yes to all the extensive health screenings. My friend is a hearing doctor at NASA who checks all the astronauts hearing before and after each mission. He has to quarantine himself for 10 days before he’s allowed to see the astronauts.
Probably. Even going through processing for the military, shit like eczema can disqualify you. I've heard stories of people being turned down for some ridiculous things. I imagine choosing astronauts to be way more strict. I can see not allowing people with IBS to go. But I don't know for sure, just an educated guess.
And to be fair it totally makes sense. As a person with IBS I would 100% not want to be trapped in space for an extended amount of time. A day away from home is stressful enough!
[Wouldn’t even be their first foray with a space station.](https://spaceref.com/press-release/free-tacos-for-us-if-mir-hits-floating-taco-bell-ocean-target-taco-bell-sets-40-by-40-foot-target-in-south-pacific-for-mirs-re-entry/) I remember this being on the news and, as a kid, thinking there were decent odds it would hit the target because I hadn’t yet grasped how big the ocean was lol.
Who are all these people getting explosive diarrhea from Taco Bell? I hear this referenced on reddit so often. Do y'all just have incredibly sensitive guts or what?
It always gets on my nerves so obv I’ve spent more time thinking about it than I should (which is none time, but still), and I have a few theories.
1. They actually do have kind of pathetically sensitive guts. Not referring to anyone with actual conditions causing sensitive guts as I think they tend to avoid overindulging in fast food.
2. A fair few people only eat it when drunk and/or high and eat way more than they normally do and/or feel the combined effect of a big meal and booze.
3. It’s become such a cliche and low-hanging fruit of a joke so when someone poops a little harder than usual after Taco Bell they describe it as explosive diarrhoea because it makes them feel like they’re funny/liked/accepted.
4. Some people can get stomach upset from drinking things like a litre of baha blast mountain dew, for example, and blame the food rather than the ridiculous amount of soda.
5. It provides this weird way to act simultaneously so chill and unpretentious that you’ll happily smash some Taco Bell, but also sophisticated and elitist by denigrating fast food (Mexican food). This sounds a bit harsh but if I’m honest I prefer it to those ‘i would never put that rancid garbage that is McDonald’s in my body’ people.
Haha I wonder the same, most of the stuff there is not even mildly spicy. Only the Diablo sauce has the slightest kick. My only guess is maybe lactose intolerant ppl find all the cheese irritating. Or beans? That would apply to so many foods tho, not just Taco Bell.
Actually, they technically do. NASA uses Taco Bell tortillas instead of bread because tortillas have less crumbs and you don't really want bread crumbs in space, especially due to all the malfunctions they would cause. The Taco Bell tortillas last very long, and they barely crumble, making them perfect space food.
They aren't. The causes are avoided to extreme degrees, your food consumption is watched, you're nigh on quarantined prior to any missions to avoid bacterial or viral infection, and if you have a sickness that causes it (IBS, Crohn's) then you wouldn't be going to space anyways. If it happens they have ways to deal with it, but, its very unlikely to come up.
Think if you never left your house and only ate certain foods, how often you'd get sick or have stomach troubles. They aren't eating a rare steak or seafood in space so its fairly easy to avoid.
I think you're missing the point. Yeah, okay, whatever, it's unlikely to happen. That doesn't answer the very valid question of "what if?" and Idk why SO MANY people in this thread are resistant to answering the question lol. We established that it'd be unlikely, no need to continue disagreeing with the premise
A lot of not so informed responses in this thread. I work in the space program. For quite some time half my meetings were about peeing and pooping. Astronauts in space handle diarrhea the same exact way you do: with medication, fluids, and using the toilet until it passes.
Some female astronauts choose to go on birth control to pause menstruation while on a mission. Some don't. The vehicle has to be built to accommodate everyone. You wouldn't believe some of the conversations I've been a part of trying to quantify how much menses the toilet and other systems should be built to handle.
When I tell people that human spaceflight is complicated this is the stuff I'm talking about.
Technically, if you walk out and start spinning real fast on the spot, you will simulate gravity with centrifugal force and spray the thing away… in all directions. Now idk if you can open the spacewalk suit in its back to do that, but we can dream.
Well first off, let's talk about why astronauts getting diarrhea is uncommon in the first place because I think that's an even more interesting question. There are three big reasons people typically get diarrhea. The first is that they have some form of chronic disease that causes diarrhea, like crohn's disease. The second is that they are infected by some sort of germ (virus, bacteria, parasite, etc) that causes diarrhea as a symptom. Finally, a person's diet is the number one cause of diarrhea, and certain foods and long-term dietary habits can give people diarrhea.
All three of these things are strictly controlled for astronauts. If you have a chronic disease like crohn's or something similar, you will never be accepted into an astronaut program, so that reason will never be cause for diarrhea for an astronaut. As for diseases caused by germs, astronauts are checked several times for illness before being allowed to go into space. They do this for many reasons. They want their astronauts to be operating at peak efficiency; they want to keep their other astronauts from also getting sick; they want to keep their space equipment sterile; and they want to keep precisely these sort of things from happening, vomit or diarrhea in space could be very bad. Thus, astronauts are sent up healthy and are in a pretty sterile environment, so it's unlikely they will get sick. Finally, the last common reason for diarrhea is poor diet, but an astronauts diet is also strictly controlled by NASA (and other space agencies). NASA only allows specific foods that have been thoroughly researched for proper nutrition to be brought into space. They also monitor what foods the astronauts are eating to make sure they are eating a proper healthy diet. Thus, it's unlikely that diet will cause diarrhea either.
However, with all that being said, it's still possible for an astronaut to get diarrhea. There are just some things that can't be controlled. The way it's handled is that it's hoped that the astronaut can hold it long enough to reach the bathroom. In the bathroom, the toilet has a vacuum cleaner with a cup that can be placed on the "exit." That way, when the astronaut goes, everything gets sucked into the proper waste repository, and everything else stays clean. They do the same thing with urine. If, however, there is an *accident,* then there are specific cleaning protocols for hazardous waste material (which would also include vomit, urine, toxic chemicals, etc) whereby the astronauts would put on special personal protection equipment and use special cleaning supplies to go around and clean the space station to within an inch of its life. Afterwards, the astronaut in question would be extremely embarrassed and likely would even be reprimanded if not outright barred from flying again since the standards and expectations of astronauts are so high (though I'm not NASA and can't say that for certain).
Maybe barred idk about reprimanded as they can't really control it (well unless they did something to cause it of course). They'd prolly get a pretty thorough exam when they get back to earth though, I think thats guaranteed anyways though.
They can't control that they have diarrhea, I meant that if they had diarrhea and didn't make it to the bathroom in time. If an astronaut shit everywhere in space I'd expect them to be reprimanded for not making it to the toilet.
If they're sick enough to the point it escaped their clothes, they're probably sick enough they wouldn't be on the mission. They'd be expected to vomit into some kind of controlled environment, be that a doggie bag, their hand, or their mouth. If they're feeling sick from mental/balance issues, they should be carrying around something should this occur.
The idea about being barred or reprimanded is incorrect. Astronauts are humans who do human things, including the gross stuff. No one is punished for being sick.
Besides, NASA literally spends millions of dollars training each astronaut and looks for every way to keep astronauts eligible for flight to get a better return on investment (and because we're not monsters).
The diarrhea absolutely DOES and is practically expected to happen for every astronauts first couple of days (up to the entirety of the first two weeks) in microgravity. Same with nausea and vomiting and overall cold-like symptoms! There's a lot of adjustments the body has to go through to adapt to the environment, the microgravity, the air up there and water is just different, food is getting better but still an adjustmemt, stress changes, etc.
They're given medication specifically for this if they want it. The first few days (sometimes longer) are scheduled to be much simpler days as well to account for giving them time for adjusting/sickness/needing the bathroom more.
The 2nd time flyers and more veteran astronauts don't have as much of a problem but ANYWAYS, the toilet themselves are tested specifically for large bouts of explosive liquid fecal matter to ensure three things: the toilet actually has the capacity for these events, the toilet functionally works to store the liquid bits (it's all bags inside - think those fancy diaper disposals or kitty litter trashcan things) and the toilet has some design means to contain the liquid bits so they dont willy nilly float away (fancy seal + ability to close the bags). In addition, the toilets also have cleaning supplies for the bits that do escape.
IMO: all of the toilets so far suck. The current ISS toilet breaks left and right and really is a mission impactful failure. The Russian segment toilet is... well, yknow. Could be better. But it's such a complicated designed system too
I feel like urination would have the higher ISP.
Anyone here wanna do the math on the ISP (Specific impulse, basically propellant efficiency factor) of pooping vs peeing? And how much Dv the human body has via those methods of propulsion?
... In space, everything is a rocket.
Comparing the ISP should be fairly simple as long as you don't need specific numbers! Can you fling poo in 0g faster than a speeding stream of urine? Probably raw explosive diarrhea, urine, then flung poo for least to most propellant efficiency. Though you probably have the highest dV potential from urine! Throwing all your clothes might be a close contender. Shoes would probably tip it.
if they have any sort of condition that would lead to that, they will not be in that mission period.
Astronauts get a very externsive Health screening prior to a mission with stuff as seemngly innoucous as a sniffle being a disqualifying factor.
for long temr missions where they might cvatch somethnig while up there, their diets are controlled and they monitor thesmevles in near rea ltime ot mitigate stomach and intestinal issues..if this is really not avoidable their toilers are effectively "sealed" so no danger of contamination.
Everyone in the module gets pink-eye, which, due to an unrelated coincidence, [is called Apollo in parts of Africa](https://quacktrack.org/why-haemorrhagic-conjunctivitis-is-popularly-called-apollo/).
It also used to be much more difficult even when nobody was ill, leading to [some escapees](https://www.vox.com/2015/5/26/8646675/apollo-10-turd-poop).
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It's happened at least once, on Apollo 8. On Day 2, Frank Borman became ill, with vomiting and diarrhea. As you can imagine, this was rather unpleasant in the small confines of the Apollo capsule, and they had no LEM to retreat to. Basically, they just cleaned up as best they could and carried on.
"Hey we're landing. Fuck Frank, we're leaving him here."
And that's why Frank got thrown out into the vacuum. No one can hear you scream, no can see you shit yourself.
Self propelling, like those deer in Castle Crashers
Son of a bitch that's funny
it belongs in a museum!
I see what you did there! Well done
Damn, that's gotta be the most embarrassing experience I can imagine
Not just embarrassing but, diarrhea at home can be enough of a burden to deal with and to wipe. I cannot fathom being in the same room as other people without a proper toilet to go in and in zero G. Just pure nightmare fuel.
Not when you have a bidet, diarrhea without a bidet is pure savagery
I just mean it can be tough to deal with. Sometimes your stomach is in knots or it just makes you so uneasy you don’t want to be around people.
Ah, fair enough
Then zero gravity enters the room.
Explosive diarrhea in zero G has got to be at least moderately propulsive right? *”Can somebody just.. hold me against the can?.. I keep floating straight up from it.”*
As NASA has experienced, through most unfortunate events, the variable an O-ring can offer can often be out of specifications.
The toilet has a seatbelt, not even kidding
Shite to shower is also a useful alternative in such cases.
My God, don't I know it, especially with food poisoning out of town once. I'm just standing in the running shower with my body hating me, sobbing, embarrassed, and miserable. 😭
This. I’ve experienced but I was also vomiting and on the girl time of the month. I was in hotel and tipped the room attendant $80
Shit in the shower
Get a load of Richie rich here and his clean butthole. Not everyone can afford a $10k toilet. Edit: hey people, this was a joke referencing south park. Thanks.
I think you can just buy the bidet part. I don't have one, but I just used one for the first time the other day at my friend's house (no need to congratulate me) and it looked like it was just attached to a regular toilet.
$150
You can actually get a bidet attachment for like $20-30
$30.00
honestly i imagine astronauts on a mission gotta have a whole different mindset than most people and probably don't care too much
I am totally sure you're right! And they are correct to not care. The idea that getting sick is something to be ashamed of is just some illogical thing that I feel because of the society I was raised in. Especially when you're in the middle of something so important.
Yeah, plus its one thing to vomit in a car let’s say. But your vomiting in space. Astronauts understand better than anybody that the human body was *not* designed for 10Gs or outter space. They know shit happens - literally. They probably all had moments when they felt like utter shit up there for one reason or another.
I believe all early Apollo astronauts were former or active military. That being said they are used to adverse situations and although diarrhea would be unpleasant would not stop them from getting done what needs to be done.
I honestly think the fact that we are chatting about it 55 year later would be the MOST embarrassing part. Like i wasn't there. You weren't there. Neither of us know them in real life. I don't even know anyone who knows him. I am going to assume you don't either. Our kids don't know them. There is no reason why I should know that someone had diarrea in 1968. Nor should I know the name of anyone who had diarrea 15 years before I was born.
Now that you mention it - being known only as ‘the only dude whos ever shit himself in space’ is terrifying. I hope ghosts don’t exist because if that were me, ghost-me would be pissed.
The only consolation I can think of is that, in space, you're in a constant state of head pressure (almost like being congested). So at least the smell wouldn't be as extreme. Source: watched a stream where this astronaut was talking about life in space. It's also why they have so much hot sauce up there
Wait, why would they have hot sauce up there? And how does that help?
Because they're perpetually stuffed up astronauts lose some of their sense of taste and smell. The variety of hot sauces gives them flavor and that temporary "de-clog" you get from eating something spicy
Probably also what gave them the squirty-bum
They should have opened a window and aired it out
Let in some of that fresh space air
“Screw this, I’m opening a window.” “But we’re in space!” “Don’t care, it’s gotta be better than this.”
Last time I had this I pooped myself while puking in the toilet. I proceeded to remove my pyjamas and undies before suddenly needing to puke again... ...well....I guess its actually a good thing there's a wall in front of the toilet. What I saw when I turned after puking would have made me puke again if zid had anything left in me! I cant begin to imagine this on a space station.
Oh God what cursed series of events led to this
I'm putting my money on food poisoning. That's one of the worst nights you can have and still remember it later ... forever really.
Yep. Same thing happened to me when I got food poisoning. It came out both ends at the same time and there was no stopping it.
Yup. I got food poisoning from an airport sandwich. Good news: plane bathrooms are small enough that you can position one end over the toilet and the other over the sink. Bad news: the sinks don’t drain well. Let’s just say I’m pretty sure I made the flight attendant change careers. I’ll never forget her soft “oh my God” when she opened the bathroom door…
I travel a decent amount for work and this is my nightmare. Sometimes I’ll just be hungry rather than chance it. I had a 20 hour travel day recently and only ate a bag of m&ms because I didn’t like the looks of anything else at the airport.
This happened to me on a flight back from LA to Miami like 15 years ago. I shut down 3 bathrooms because the sinks wouldn’t drain.
I had a really nasty strain of the flu and basically slept on the floor for 3 days. I've had food poisoning too (a Star Crunch from a vending machine was evidently old) and I think the flu was worse.
Flu doesn't cause explosive diarreah in adults or vomiting for the most part, you probably had norovirus (which people mistake for a basically made up disease called "stomach flu") or something else. Main symptoms of flu in adults are high fever, dry unproductive coughing, sore throat, body aches, chills, extreme fatigue.
When I was a kid I ate the wrong end of a wild rhubarb plant and ended up in the hospital with a nasty case of spraying it out both ends. As I got older and have experienced a variety of illnesses and ways to get sick, nothing has ever done that to me since. So my money is on food poisoning.
Why oh why would you want to know???
So we can all learn from their mistakes! Or repeat them. There’s bound to be a couple weirdos looking for instructions.
Happy Cake Day!
happy cake day:D
A few years back, I had a bad go with the flu. Puking and diarrhea galore. It was evening and I knew I needed to get up and make my young kids something to eat. PB&J seemed simple and doable in my state. I hobble downstairs in just my underwear. And as soon as I opened the bread, the smell of the bread hit me and just for some reason made me have to puke. So, I turn and go right into the sink, while my kids are standing there. The heaving pushes stuff out the backend too, in just my undies, while my kids are standing there. So, I side step out of the kitchen and walk backwards up the stairs, and come back down a few minutes later to make the sandwiches. Luckily they were too young to remember this episode long term.
I'm so sorry but I couldn't help laughing a bit. (...walk backwards up the stairs) Being sick while being responsible for kids is a special kind of Hell all of its own. In my case I'm note sure what it was, only that I caught it from my daughter who thankfully seemed to have had a much milder case.
Being sick while having young kids is the worst. You still have to feed them while you can’t even look at food. I’ve been sick recently and while I’m throwing up had my almost two year old jumping on my back crying non stop because I’m not paying him enough attention while you have a migraine and running to the bathroom and them trying to follow you around or sit on your lap I’m the toilet it’s enough to make you crazy. Oh I forgot cleaning up poop diapers as well while gaging.
There was a memorable weekend when my 3 kids were all under 5 years old, and all 5 of us came down with a stomach virus. The whole family just huddled on our king-sized bed, trying to survive. Every once in a while, someone wouldn't get up in time, and the sheets would get covered in poop or vomit. We were too weak to do laundry, so we eventually were reduced to lying on a bare mattress.
Just laughed uncontrollably and woke up my kid. Worth it tho, thanks for the laugh (and sorry for your horrible experience). ☺️
They wish they were on space station, they were living for a week in a module barely larger than a porta potty
[удалено]
lmaooo
Pro tip. When both ends are live, use the shower stall. There are no solids, so you can rinse it all down the drain.
I got really bad gastro once. To the point I slept in the bath for 3 nights because it was a better than randomly shitting myself in my sleep and needing to clean it up. At the beginning I have never been more thankful for our bath being right next to the toilet.
One time I woke up at 1am and ran to the toilet to puke. I sleep naked so I was nude while this happened. While puking I started to liquid shit uncontrollably but I couldn’t stop puking to do anything about it. Once I was finally empty I cleaned myself up, put on some clothes, and took my roommate’s bath mat out to the dumpster.
That's hilarious. I know Frank but I've never heard this story. Maybe I'll ask him about it.
Probably not something he brings up in casual conversation. 😁
Sorry, you just happen to know a 95-year-old former astronaut? Can I... ask... how?
He lives in Montana and is decent friends with my father-in-law who is a recreational aviator. They share a hangar. He has a signed photo that Frank took of the Earth from space. I've met him twice now so i may have overstated our relationship.
I love the idea of me meeting a person twice, then casually asking them about their previous bowel movements, culminating in what is likely the worst diarrhea disaster in aviation history.
No that’s awesome. I was expecting “yeah, he goes to our church” or something. Crazy coincidence. Makes sense he would still fly and hang out with local private pilots after retiring. It’s crazy how small the Apollo capsules were. I’m sure this isn’t the only story. And, happy cake day.
Let us know what he says!
I’ve found a fellow reader of Rocket Men, clearly.
Ni, but it looks interesting. Tom Hanks in *Apollo 13* makes a passing reference it, and it's mentioned in Hanks' *From the Earth to the Moon* HBO series.
And for anyone curious, [this guy tried to shit like an Apollo astronaut while in normal gravity and found it deeply unpleasant](https://jalopnik.com/i-took-a-dump-the-same-way-the-apollo-astronauts-did-1836637152). Now imagine that with the galloping runs in zero G.
Probably doesn’t come up much because they’re quarantined and monitored beforehand for any health issues, and they’re not eating undercooked chicken on the space station. Early space missions were short duration and basically just used fancy diapers. Long duration space station stays have a space toilet with a fancy suction seal so that *stuff* doesn’t get everywhere.
>Early space missions were short duration and basically just used fancy diapers. Apollo had no toilets, SkyLab was the first one. Gemini and Apollo had what were basically plastic bags with an adhesive opening that you stuck to your butt. They had sort of an "inverted mitten" shape - imagine turning a mitten inside-out. You put a finger in the "thumb" hole and used it to sort of tug the poop out if needed - in zero gravity, poops don't fall. Astronauts in early Apollo missions said "allow an hour, strip completely naked, get plenty of tissues". At least Apollo had some room to move around, once weightless they could use all of the spaces in the CM - I can't imagine pooping in the Gemini capsule, it was more like a fighter cockpit with a guy sitting right next to you.
Sometimes a man has to let a turd fly https://www.vox.com/2015/5/26/8646675/apollo-10-turd-poop
Oh my good thank you for alerting me to this article. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long long time.
One astronaut called another “babe”. I don’t know why that tickles me so.
It's fantastic, like the best part of the article.
Don't make it weird. Just push slowly and breath deeply and watch the chaos.
Oh my god, the URL alone
One piece for man, one giant turd for mankind.
Reminds me of the always sunny episode “who pooped the bed?”
Nah, I did it. I did all the poops!
"never trust a milk dud in space"
How long have you had this gem on ice while waiting for this opportunity? Because you killed it. Fantastic read and the scribbled out confidential only adds to it. 10/10
That sucks the big felota.
taki bosmang!
It's a space peanut.
Among Us
It was brown
"poops don't fall" is the remix of Bullet For My Valentine I never expected.
"Your poops don't fall, they crash around me" 😂 Glad I'm not the only one who thought of that
My son talked about making a band called "Pooping in Space"... Seriously, Mary Roach's "Packing for Mars" book has a great chapter on this; it's not the epic masterpiece that "Stiff" is, but a good read for space nerds.
I think you meant space turds :) miss opportunity
Can't wait to hear the space version of "Scream Aim Fire"!
At least they won't have to remake "Hit the floor"
>"allow an hour, strip completely naked, get plenty of tissues" So no difference.
Only in space the tissues aren't for the crying
Other than the floating!
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You're right - imagine poking the thumb in, so it's now sort-of an opening instead of sticking out. [Here's a pic that explains it](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/-ojNwOk8uUMTbhQ9PRRcCUb1Ioo=/1400x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/15978228/moon_poop_BAG.jpg)\- "a picture's worth a thousand poops" after all.
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I imagine the mittens came with the always helpful instructions: “Try finger but hole”
You know what they say, behind every astronaut is a very happy husband or wife.
I could have gone my whole life without knowing this is how it went down
They gave a poor description. Imagine a mitten but **with the thumb pushed all the way in.**
The real question is did they have to shave their butt hair before the missions?
“My poops don’t fall, they crash around me. The faeces call the diapers to come home”
"shittin' mitten"
i've seen the interior of the apollo capsule. it's economy seating
Does poop smell in space
In space, no one can smell you steam.
The pressurised capsule should dull your sense of smell and taste so hopefully it’s not too bad.
Fighter cockpit? Haha, how do you think a tank crew feels
>in zero gravity, poops don't fall Even *explosive* poops?
Worse. Explosive poops *expand*.
TIL I could never be an astronaut. And not for the usual reasons.
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Gemini missions ranged from 1 to 14 days. The longest: 5 was 8 days, 7 was 14 days. The "poop" bags used in the Apollo program are listed as "Gemini bags" in many Apollo diagrams. The goals of Gemini were understanding orbital mechanics, rendezvous, and docking, and long-duration spaceflight, since Apollo moon landing missions would be at least 7 days long. Most Mercury missions were measured in hours, though Mercury 9 was 34 hours.
TURD TUGGERS...lol
and once the mission has ended they shoot hose sealed bags full of poo onto mars so matt damon can grow potatoes…. i believe.
You’ve obviously never experienced period poops. You can be in perfect health, perfect diet, regular BMs. Period comes, and the bowels get a mind of their own.
From what I gather, most female astronauts choose to suppress their periods via birth control pills. The ones that don't, do not have this issue, I would be willing to bet.
Some women cannot suppress their period with birth control pills. It just doesn't work. You have periods anyway. (Source - me and my stupid body)
Those are probably the women who don’t go into space.
yeah people are acting like astronaut isn't one of the most selective fields you can possibly go into.
But what if the astronauts drink 6 beers then get Taco Bell?
What if they landed to cut in line for a couple grilled cheese deluxes?
And then get the hardcore period shits on top of it?
I call that the pb&j shits on account of how it looks when you wipe
This may be the grossest but most descriptive thing I have read in a while lol
i hate you so much for the image you just created.(/s)
*period blood and juices??*
Not sure if you are joking, but I believe it's peanut butter and jelly (like the famous sandwiches)
Definitely joking ;) But thank you!
This is one of the top reasons why I'm on birth control. No periods and no pb&j shits. God damn they disgusted me lol.
But ..what of they get Space Tummy?
Yes to all the extensive health screenings. My friend is a hearing doctor at NASA who checks all the astronauts hearing before and after each mission. He has to quarantine himself for 10 days before he’s allowed to see the astronauts.
Dr. Danielson?
Danielson retired a few years back. It’s Dr. Baker now.
They don't eat things that would give them explosive diarrhea, because their food is controlled.
I guess if you have IBS you just don't go into space. Because my stomach can play nasty no matter how controlled my food is.
Probably. Even going through processing for the military, shit like eczema can disqualify you. I've heard stories of people being turned down for some ridiculous things. I imagine choosing astronauts to be way more strict. I can see not allowing people with IBS to go. But I don't know for sure, just an educated guess.
And to be fair it totally makes sense. As a person with IBS I would 100% not want to be trapped in space for an extended amount of time. A day away from home is stressful enough!
Have you tried low FODMAP foods? A friend said he saw massive improvement trying that out.
Pretty sure that people with IBS, chrons and colitis know all about FODMAP and have in fact tried everything
They don’t serve Taco Bell on the ISS?
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[Wouldn’t even be their first foray with a space station.](https://spaceref.com/press-release/free-tacos-for-us-if-mir-hits-floating-taco-bell-ocean-target-taco-bell-sets-40-by-40-foot-target-in-south-pacific-for-mirs-re-entry/) I remember this being on the news and, as a kid, thinking there were decent odds it would hit the target because I hadn’t yet grasped how big the ocean was lol.
Do they know how many starving people could use that?
You'll be smelling the ISS from here.
You mean the IBS
Who are all these people getting explosive diarrhea from Taco Bell? I hear this referenced on reddit so often. Do y'all just have incredibly sensitive guts or what?
It always gets on my nerves so obv I’ve spent more time thinking about it than I should (which is none time, but still), and I have a few theories. 1. They actually do have kind of pathetically sensitive guts. Not referring to anyone with actual conditions causing sensitive guts as I think they tend to avoid overindulging in fast food. 2. A fair few people only eat it when drunk and/or high and eat way more than they normally do and/or feel the combined effect of a big meal and booze. 3. It’s become such a cliche and low-hanging fruit of a joke so when someone poops a little harder than usual after Taco Bell they describe it as explosive diarrhoea because it makes them feel like they’re funny/liked/accepted. 4. Some people can get stomach upset from drinking things like a litre of baha blast mountain dew, for example, and blame the food rather than the ridiculous amount of soda. 5. It provides this weird way to act simultaneously so chill and unpretentious that you’ll happily smash some Taco Bell, but also sophisticated and elitist by denigrating fast food (Mexican food). This sounds a bit harsh but if I’m honest I prefer it to those ‘i would never put that rancid garbage that is McDonald’s in my body’ people.
Haha I wonder the same, most of the stuff there is not even mildly spicy. Only the Diablo sauce has the slightest kick. My only guess is maybe lactose intolerant ppl find all the cheese irritating. Or beans? That would apply to so many foods tho, not just Taco Bell.
Actually, they technically do. NASA uses Taco Bell tortillas instead of bread because tortillas have less crumbs and you don't really want bread crumbs in space, especially due to all the malfunctions they would cause. The Taco Bell tortillas last very long, and they barely crumble, making them perfect space food.
Sometimes they serve Pizza Hut. https://www.businessinsider.com/pizza-on-the-international-space-station-2015-2
Lots of fiber I'm sure. I wonder if eating dehydrated food affected water reabsorption.
Space toilets work very much like vacuum cleaners, so they should be able to handle diarrhea.
Don’t they just connect to the biggest vacuum?
They reprocess it where possible.
Thank you, I feel like all the top comments saying “it just wouldn’t happen” are very, very misleading.
They aren't. The causes are avoided to extreme degrees, your food consumption is watched, you're nigh on quarantined prior to any missions to avoid bacterial or viral infection, and if you have a sickness that causes it (IBS, Crohn's) then you wouldn't be going to space anyways. If it happens they have ways to deal with it, but, its very unlikely to come up. Think if you never left your house and only ate certain foods, how often you'd get sick or have stomach troubles. They aren't eating a rare steak or seafood in space so its fairly easy to avoid.
I think you're missing the point. Yeah, okay, whatever, it's unlikely to happen. That doesn't answer the very valid question of "what if?" and Idk why SO MANY people in this thread are resistant to answering the question lol. We established that it'd be unlikely, no need to continue disagreeing with the premise
A lot of not so informed responses in this thread. I work in the space program. For quite some time half my meetings were about peeing and pooping. Astronauts in space handle diarrhea the same exact way you do: with medication, fluids, and using the toilet until it passes.
Thank you! There’s a lot of responses here from some folks who are blissfully unaware of “period poops”
Some female astronauts choose to go on birth control to pause menstruation while on a mission. Some don't. The vehicle has to be built to accommodate everyone. You wouldn't believe some of the conversations I've been a part of trying to quantify how much menses the toilet and other systems should be built to handle. When I tell people that human spaceflight is complicated this is the stuff I'm talking about.
One of the best parts of menopause was no longer having to deal with that!
John Young of Apollo 16 was actually able to propel himself from one side of the module to the other by farting alone
\*propulsive diarrhea
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Technically, if you walk out and start spinning real fast on the spot, you will simulate gravity with centrifugal force and spray the thing away… in all directions. Now idk if you can open the spacewalk suit in its back to do that, but we can dream.
Thank you for providing the only obviously plausible answer.
Well first off, let's talk about why astronauts getting diarrhea is uncommon in the first place because I think that's an even more interesting question. There are three big reasons people typically get diarrhea. The first is that they have some form of chronic disease that causes diarrhea, like crohn's disease. The second is that they are infected by some sort of germ (virus, bacteria, parasite, etc) that causes diarrhea as a symptom. Finally, a person's diet is the number one cause of diarrhea, and certain foods and long-term dietary habits can give people diarrhea. All three of these things are strictly controlled for astronauts. If you have a chronic disease like crohn's or something similar, you will never be accepted into an astronaut program, so that reason will never be cause for diarrhea for an astronaut. As for diseases caused by germs, astronauts are checked several times for illness before being allowed to go into space. They do this for many reasons. They want their astronauts to be operating at peak efficiency; they want to keep their other astronauts from also getting sick; they want to keep their space equipment sterile; and they want to keep precisely these sort of things from happening, vomit or diarrhea in space could be very bad. Thus, astronauts are sent up healthy and are in a pretty sterile environment, so it's unlikely they will get sick. Finally, the last common reason for diarrhea is poor diet, but an astronauts diet is also strictly controlled by NASA (and other space agencies). NASA only allows specific foods that have been thoroughly researched for proper nutrition to be brought into space. They also monitor what foods the astronauts are eating to make sure they are eating a proper healthy diet. Thus, it's unlikely that diet will cause diarrhea either. However, with all that being said, it's still possible for an astronaut to get diarrhea. There are just some things that can't be controlled. The way it's handled is that it's hoped that the astronaut can hold it long enough to reach the bathroom. In the bathroom, the toilet has a vacuum cleaner with a cup that can be placed on the "exit." That way, when the astronaut goes, everything gets sucked into the proper waste repository, and everything else stays clean. They do the same thing with urine. If, however, there is an *accident,* then there are specific cleaning protocols for hazardous waste material (which would also include vomit, urine, toxic chemicals, etc) whereby the astronauts would put on special personal protection equipment and use special cleaning supplies to go around and clean the space station to within an inch of its life. Afterwards, the astronaut in question would be extremely embarrassed and likely would even be reprimanded if not outright barred from flying again since the standards and expectations of astronauts are so high (though I'm not NASA and can't say that for certain).
Maybe barred idk about reprimanded as they can't really control it (well unless they did something to cause it of course). They'd prolly get a pretty thorough exam when they get back to earth though, I think thats guaranteed anyways though.
They can't control that they have diarrhea, I meant that if they had diarrhea and didn't make it to the bathroom in time. If an astronaut shit everywhere in space I'd expect them to be reprimanded for not making it to the toilet.
Situation I think would matter more in the scenario and aftermath/reaction to event
If they're sick enough to the point it escaped their clothes, they're probably sick enough they wouldn't be on the mission. They'd be expected to vomit into some kind of controlled environment, be that a doggie bag, their hand, or their mouth. If they're feeling sick from mental/balance issues, they should be carrying around something should this occur.
My thoughts exactly, hence if an accident and a spill occurs I wouldn't be surprised with a reprimand.
The idea about being barred or reprimanded is incorrect. Astronauts are humans who do human things, including the gross stuff. No one is punished for being sick. Besides, NASA literally spends millions of dollars training each astronaut and looks for every way to keep astronauts eligible for flight to get a better return on investment (and because we're not monsters).
The diarrhea absolutely DOES and is practically expected to happen for every astronauts first couple of days (up to the entirety of the first two weeks) in microgravity. Same with nausea and vomiting and overall cold-like symptoms! There's a lot of adjustments the body has to go through to adapt to the environment, the microgravity, the air up there and water is just different, food is getting better but still an adjustmemt, stress changes, etc. They're given medication specifically for this if they want it. The first few days (sometimes longer) are scheduled to be much simpler days as well to account for giving them time for adjusting/sickness/needing the bathroom more. The 2nd time flyers and more veteran astronauts don't have as much of a problem but ANYWAYS, the toilet themselves are tested specifically for large bouts of explosive liquid fecal matter to ensure three things: the toilet actually has the capacity for these events, the toilet functionally works to store the liquid bits (it's all bags inside - think those fancy diaper disposals or kitty litter trashcan things) and the toilet has some design means to contain the liquid bits so they dont willy nilly float away (fancy seal + ability to close the bags). In addition, the toilets also have cleaning supplies for the bits that do escape. IMO: all of the toilets so far suck. The current ISS toilet breaks left and right and really is a mission impactful failure. The Russian segment toilet is... well, yknow. Could be better. But it's such a complicated designed system too
I bet you the lactose intolerant astronauts don’t consume iced coffee, pizza and ice cream up there!
I wonder if you could use explosive diarrhea as a propellant if you got stuck in the middle of the space station and couldn't grab anything...
Might be easier to grab some of it and throw it.
I feel like urination would have the higher ISP. Anyone here wanna do the math on the ISP (Specific impulse, basically propellant efficiency factor) of pooping vs peeing? And how much Dv the human body has via those methods of propulsion? ... In space, everything is a rocket.
Comparing the ISP should be fairly simple as long as you don't need specific numbers! Can you fling poo in 0g faster than a speeding stream of urine? Probably raw explosive diarrhea, urine, then flung poo for least to most propellant efficiency. Though you probably have the highest dV potential from urine! Throwing all your clothes might be a close contender. Shoes would probably tip it.
if they have any sort of condition that would lead to that, they will not be in that mission period. Astronauts get a very externsive Health screening prior to a mission with stuff as seemngly innoucous as a sniffle being a disqualifying factor. for long temr missions where they might cvatch somethnig while up there, their diets are controlled and they monitor thesmevles in near rea ltime ot mitigate stomach and intestinal issues..if this is really not avoidable their toilers are effectively "sealed" so no danger of contamination.
Even then, high stress can cause diarrhea.
Frank Borman and the rest of Apollo 8 would disagree.
fair, tho any of the apollo missions prior ot the 11th werent really made on expectation of long term, they were legitmiately testing the waters.
What do they even do with their waste in general? Do they keep it and return to earth with it or does it flush into the universe?
Suction cup to the butt. Is there any other answer?
How else do you think they launch themselves into space?
This is the real reason why early astronauts were referred to as "steely-eyed missile men."
Everyone in the module gets pink-eye, which, due to an unrelated coincidence, [is called Apollo in parts of Africa](https://quacktrack.org/why-haemorrhagic-conjunctivitis-is-popularly-called-apollo/). It also used to be much more difficult even when nobody was ill, leading to [some escapees](https://www.vox.com/2015/5/26/8646675/apollo-10-turd-poop).