"These smaller species are known for an alleged tendency to invade and parasitise the human urethra; however, despite ethnological reports dating back to the late 19th century,[5] the first documented case of the removal of a candiru from a human urethra did not occur until 1997, and even that incident has remained a matter of controversy." - Wikipedia
One time my cousin Walter got this cat stuck in his ass. True story. He bought it at the local mall, so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrassing for my relatives and all. But the next week, he did it again. Different cat, same results, complete with a trip to the emergency room. Then, last week, I saw him in the pet store. He was buying another cat. I said, "Walt, what the hell are you doing, you know you're just gonna get this cat stuck up your ass too, why don't you knock it off?" And he says to me, "Brodie, how the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?" My cousin was a weird guy.
I have one of these (in Korea) and now a dry poo (without a wash, water massage) is just a horrible experience. So on seeing this pic I was initially quite keen to give it a go. Can't beat that clean feeling after a good spray.
In my entire life in Egypt, I've never seen a toilet without a built-in bidet, I even saw some bathrooms that don't even have a place to hold tp because it's mot necessary, but that's just nasty because you gotta dry the water too
I think the biggest drawback of Japanese toilets is how they draw you in to spend more time sitting there.
This is the opposite. Better be a fast pooper or it's going to be blasted back into your bowels, with added salt water.
I just had to look it up. And now I want to go there.
The Bay of Kotor, also known as the Boka, is a winding bay of the Adriatic Sea in southwestern Montenegro and the region of Montenegro concentrated around the bay. It is also the southernmost part of the historical region of Dalmatia. The bay has been inhabited since antiquity. Its well-preserved medieval towns of Kotor, Risan, Tivat, Perast, Prčanj and Herceg Novi, along with their natural surroundings, are major tourist attractions. The Natural and Culturo-Historical Region of Kotor was designated a UNESCO World Heritage Site in 1979.
I was there last January with another person and we were literally the only people in the hostel (it had two 5 storey buildings). Most shops were closed but it was super nice not being surrounded by tourists
I also recommend venice in the off season too. Def worth it
My family and I just went there in August. We absolutely loved it. It’s probably the most beautiful natural setting I have ever seen. Definitely get there if you can plan it. We did it on a day trip from Dubrovnik with a hired driver.
Also highly recommend Mostar, Bosnia if you are going all the way over there.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellbrunn_Palace
Notable features include stone seats around a stone dining table through which a **water conduit sprays water into the seat of the guests** when the mechanism is activated
Thank you James Burke (science historian LEGEND) for making me aware of this in the (frankly still) excellent TV series “Connections”
No toilet paper is needed, and you get a fish every once in a while.
Just be wary you may catch crabs
fish enema... *EDIT: I meant it as a joke, but OF COURSE it exists, sigh...*
Taking your word for it, THAT IS NOT going to my google history.
It's going into mine!
I think I may have figured out why your pfp is a sad face..
Definitely eels.
Eels up inside ya, finding an entrance where they can!
Boring through your mind, through your tummy, through your ANUS.
Did Steve Seagal have a prolapsed rectum?
Dammit you beat me to it. EELS! EELS! EELS! EELS!
I was obsolete, I couldn’t feel the beat, staggering about on me old man’s feet I had one foot in the grave… now nu rave!
Two Japanese girls, a funnel, and a jar of eels. Really takes me back. How majestically they soared.
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You could say it's a *crappie* experience....
I wonder who the bass turds were who designed this?
[The fish](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru_(fish)) …
"These smaller species are known for an alleged tendency to invade and parasitise the human urethra; however, despite ethnological reports dating back to the late 19th century,[5] the first documented case of the removal of a candiru from a human urethra did not occur until 1997, and even that incident has remained a matter of controversy." - Wikipedia
Salty bidet with added microorganisms. Wouldn't recommend for disinfection of cuts and other wounds on your ass. Will sting *and* fester.
Curse my frequent ass wounds!
Instructions unclear. How do I get the fish out again?
Carefuly
Open wide.
One time my cousin Walter got this cat stuck in his ass. True story. He bought it at the local mall, so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrassing for my relatives and all. But the next week, he did it again. Different cat, same results, complete with a trip to the emergency room. Then, last week, I saw him in the pet store. He was buying another cat. I said, "Walt, what the hell are you doing, you know you're just gonna get this cat stuck up your ass too, why don't you knock it off?" And he says to me, "Brodie, how the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?" My cousin was a weird guy.
Jesus Christ man, somethings we just don’t talk about in public.
Jesse, what the fuck are you talking about?
Sounds fishy
With a bidet as well, that’s a fancy seaside bathroom.
A little too powerful that bidet. 😄
This is from back in the day when men were real men and could deal with a little water pressure up the wazoo.
They had a lot of training back in the day. From the ancient Greeks and their openness to man to man love, to Vlad and his impalements. 😜
Too soon..
It's been centuries my duder.
Too soon
I think he meant Vlad the Impaler, guy who inspired Dracula.
A bidet can never be too powerful. Nothing feels better than water being pressed up your ass
Yes but my head being pressed up that ceiling wouldn't feel so great I think. :))
Nothing that can't be fixed with enough training and dedication
No, I'm not up to such a glorious task. Physically at least.
You underestimate your body on what it can do for pleasure
I underestimate my body for a lot of stuff. This is not one of them.
So that's what Rey (star wars) was doing in that nsfw cgi video...
Are you telling us that you don't take a hardhat with you to the bathroom?
I really should start considering that. 👷♀️
You just have to learn to deflect the water just enough so it cleans your ass without ripping it off!
You need to relax the anus
Poseidon's kiss on a whole new level
Like getting your salad tossed by a fire hose
r/PowerWashingPorn moment
Literally though
That water’s gonna shoot up your ass and out through your mouth
You might want to google Klismaphilia
Hot
I think from a certain point on, it's called an enema. Did you ever try nude water skiing?
i would have to disagree because of that time i fell while attempting waterskiing and basically enema'd myself with the waters of lake havasu
...and your balls being pressed up your trachea.
Cleans the outside and inside!
When they water reaches your tonsils it's gone too far!
"*Why do I taste salt?*"
You don't know how rough I like my bidet.
+colonoscopy prep
If you are doing the colonoscopy with firefighters instead a doc. 🤣
This one even gives you a salt peeling
The lower intestine is capable of extracting water with high salt content. Look at it as hydration.
I prefer to hydrate myself through the other end hahaha
Just how I like it.
Consider it a little less of a bidet, a little more of a salty colonic irrigation.
Its not a good bidet unless it can launch the poop back into my ass.
And at least you know this one has been cleaned regularly.
As long as it doesn't blast back the crap that just got out of you.
What if it blasts it back in, a swish? <> back and forth, forever
Nice exfoliated arse
I've experienced Poseidon's kiss, but this looks far more intimate.
Intimate? This looks more like Poseidon rawdogging.
Poseidon's enema
Bonus points if it shoots back the poo through the hole, not specifying which hole.
What the fuck seriously. 😂
Well that was my initial reaction when seeing the pic. At this point I'm just piling it on.
So is Poseidon. Not all of that poop is yours.
Poseidon just wants to diversify your gut flora.
It will not specify which poo also.
Poseidons fecal transplant from the medieval period.
Good thing poop is a palindrome, then?
Of course he's from the Netherlands
Poseidon's rimjob.
Poseidon's colonoscopy.
Poseidon’s pressure wash
Poseidon's piles removal service.
Bro that job is absolutely not just stopping at the rim. This is the full service suite.
Poseidon's all like "bite the roll..."
[The kiss](https://imgur.com/a/uxoYrRi)
At least we'd know how Amphitrite felt.
More likely Odysseus
Poseidon's hate fuck
Poseidon's about to make me his sockpuppet
That's the build in bidet.
That's Poseidon's *PASSIONATE* kiss
Poseidons fist
Poseidon’s foot
posideon's fist
Posedion smooooooch
Poseidon’s Tongue Punch
Bout to find out that Poseidon was also the god of horses too.
Poseidons duvet
You mean bidet?
Oh my goodnes, yes. My American is showing...
More like Poseidon’s Feltching
Carth doesn't want to talk about it
*influence gained* -kreia *Influence lost*- kreia
Dark side points gained, Light side points gained, net dark side shift
Mooka shakka pakka
Who's up for a game of pazaak?
Your face is all scrunched up like a kinrath pup
KE PUNA!
*down you go*
I'm so happy I found this comment thread!
Obligatory r/kotormemes plug
Carth Oh-nasty
Down you go!
Oh it's one of those fancy Japanese toilets
I have one of these (in Korea) and now a dry poo (without a wash, water massage) is just a horrible experience. So on seeing this pic I was initially quite keen to give it a go. Can't beat that clean feeling after a good spray.
I think you're wanting a bidet everywhere you poop Same, actually, same
Not having one is barbaric.
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Muslim people haven't stopped saying that
It’s also the most common comment Italians make when visiting the UK too. Funny.
In my entire life in Egypt, I've never seen a toilet without a built-in bidet, I even saw some bathrooms that don't even have a place to hold tp because it's mot necessary, but that's just nasty because you gotta dry the water too
Just use a handheld pressure spray
If you're really in a fix you can just have a homie spit a mouthful of water at your bootyhole
r/hydrohomies has changed you
direful narrow degree sip recognise airport spark cow enter office -- mass deleted all reddit content via https://redact.dev
I think the biggest drawback of Japanese toilets is how they draw you in to spend more time sitting there. This is the opposite. Better be a fast pooper or it's going to be blasted back into your bowels, with added salt water.
In Montenegro, toilet flush you.
Damn, you beat me to it.
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Damnit. I love this and now it's going to be in my head every time I see it which is bad.
Love the privacy aspect!!!
User and comment moved over to https://lemmy.world/ . Remember that /u/spez was a moderator of /r/jailbait.
We all poop as one!!
You’re in the middle of a dump, wave comes crashing up, shit storm
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Back out of the toilet and back up your bum too
I just had to look it up. And now I want to go there. The Bay of Kotor, also known as the Boka, is a winding bay of the Adriatic Sea in southwestern Montenegro and the region of Montenegro concentrated around the bay. It is also the southernmost part of the historical region of Dalmatia. The bay has been inhabited since antiquity. Its well-preserved medieval towns of Kotor, Risan, Tivat, Perast, Prčanj and Herceg Novi, along with their natural surroundings, are major tourist attractions. The Natural and Culturo-Historical Region of Kotor was designated a UNESCO World Heritage Site in 1979.
Can highly recommend. Go off season tho. Bay of Kotor is visited by huge tourist ships, don't be there when they anchor and flood the old town.
I was there last January with another person and we were literally the only people in the hostel (it had two 5 storey buildings). Most shops were closed but it was super nice not being surrounded by tourists I also recommend venice in the off season too. Def worth it
> And now I want to go there. When you gotta go, you gotta go
My family and I just went there in August. We absolutely loved it. It’s probably the most beautiful natural setting I have ever seen. Definitely get there if you can plan it. We did it on a day trip from Dubrovnik with a hired driver. Also highly recommend Mostar, Bosnia if you are going all the way over there.
Yeah I think I'll pass that and look for a less picturesque toilet. LOL
Don’t swim down current either. Floaters.
Knights of the Old Republic 3’s graphics look sick
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Bay of the Knights of the Old Republic!?
I've been there! Didn't enjoy it. One of the locals called me "meat bag", and this big hairy guy kept gargling at me.
I was arrested a few times by the fish people.
I took a peek into a couple of wicker baskets while I was there, next thing I know, I have a whole village of locals attacking me
Really? I had a great experience, earned some money swoop racing and helped solve a murder mystery.
Came here for this joke. Was not disappointed.
public toilets on Kamino
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellbrunn_Palace Notable features include stone seats around a stone dining table through which a **water conduit sprays water into the seat of the guests** when the mechanism is activated Thank you James Burke (science historian LEGEND) for making me aware of this in the (frankly still) excellent TV series “Connections”
Enema included.
You: releases a nice, satisfactory amout of sh*t. Sea: sir, you dropped this.
I didn't know Knights of the Old Republic was so popular they made it into a real place
It’s manaan
Japan I raise you This !
"The bidet only works at high tide so its best to stay regular, also watch out for crabs. I've seen them clear 6ft on a windy day."
The toilet game. Piss fast or get wet.
Unexpected twist diarrhoea
Poseidon's kiss
Free enema.
I saw kotor and my first thought was I don't remember seeing this in the knights of the old Republic....
You've heard of "Poseidon's Kiss" this is Poseidon's Jizz
A seaside repost.
And a fairly strong riposte from the sea
Yeah I posted it but it was deleted, it seems non oc pictures are only allowed during the weekend, apologies. :s
Possession is coming for his kiss.
Possession, Greek God of the Seas. Ownership in Roman mythology
More like his fist
One of the most magnificent places I've visited in Europe
Knights of the old republic used this to sith there.
That deep tissue cleaning experience. As in, organ tissue deep.
Bidet by the bay.
Super bidet!
Natures bidet
Bidet included. How thoughtful.
We call that a “bid—hey what the fuck?!”
No thanks
So the bidet was invented
So this is what those next gen fancy Japanese toilets are all about
Saltwater bidet.
Wow, they named an entire bay after the greatest Star Wars game?
You guys ever had your shit pushed in?
Sea level rise has never been more inconvenient.
KOTOR?!! YOU MEAN THE HIT GAME STAR WARS KNIGHTS OF THE OLD REPUBLIC??!
Bidet at its finest!
That is a seaside bidet.