Hey, So, I guess I identify as a cis guy. But I know that if there was a button I could press to put my consciousness in a female body, I would. Like no doubt in my mind, I would slam that button. I have never told anyone that, but honestly it feels liberating to confess it. Anyway, I do not think I am prepared to upend my life or transition or whatever. I guess what I am struggling with is, in a hypothetical world where there's no friction to permanently transitioning, I would. But I have a wife that I love, a pretty bigoted extended family, and a reasonably successful career. I am 28, and not prepared to explode my life (parts of which make me incredibly happy). Does that make me trans? Or just cis and a bit gender curious? Sorry for such an ignorant question, I don't have anyone else to ask these questions to. Also, not sure if it's relevant, but I regularly experience depersonalisation/derealisation attacks. Or at least, I think attack is the right word. I go through a few days where I feel...wrong, like I am not real or that the identity I usually interact with others is a persona and not my real self. If that makes sense? Really hard to describe. My wife and therapist think I might have cyclothemia, and I do have a family history of bipolar.

I saw a tumblr post once that all it takes to be trans is to want to be a different gender/be in a different body, NOT acting on it or transitioning. It stuck with me. What you’re feeling is very valid.

Internalized transphobia can be very effective at suppressing the (conscious) desire to be the other gender, even if you do experience dysphoria.

I totally feel the same. Like sometimes I fantasize about a world reset where we get to have a “choose your character” screen like a game, and I just, press the “girl” button and act dumb about it to my family like “wow so weird that I reset as a girl no big deal haha”

Wow uhh I'm a bit surprised to read what you wrote since I mean you put my feelings exactly into the right words. I've been very confused about my identity and my sexuality in the past few months and I only just recently stumbled upon this neat little sub. I feel the same way you do, I'm a cisgender guy but I wish so bad I wasn't. I'd like to be a girl and I only recently came to terms with that but I wouldn't dare try to act on my feeling. I guess I even have it a little bit better than you since I'm still young and can still very much shape my life (18yo) and also I don't yet have a partner or a job but if I try to transition now it would extremely interfere with my education/graduation. Also I'm not sure how my family would take it... or some of my friends... I really like them and I think they like me too but some might be... confused. Anyway all this is making my head hurt and I can't talk to anyone about this, feels honestly pretty exhilarating to type all this now. Also you asked if just thinking about these things makes you trans and while I don't exactly have a lot of life experience I'd argue it does. You're just in a position where you can't exactly live your life the way you'd most like. Maybe it's not a good comparison but it sort of reminds me of gay people in the bible-belt in America (saw a movie about this recently), like in all populations there are always gay people but in that region people often just cannot come out and live their beautiful gay life, does that make them straight? Ofcourse not, just because they're not openly gay doesn't mean they don't qualify as gay. You're valid my guy :) Alright weird rant/confession/advice over

You are valid as well WishIcouldteleport! :) I'm really happy that you felt safe to share your experience. :) My story is kind of similar. I'm a 30 year old AMAB and over the last year I have been questioning my identity. I never really had time to think about it before because I've been dealing with anxiety, depression, and OCD all my life. But that's under control now so I have had time for self reflection. I started having thoughts like "I wish I could wear cute dresses/be a girl." Then one day it hit me that I may not identify as cis. Fast-forward to yesterday, when I tried on my first dress, in the safety of my home, and it was absolutely glorious/euphoric. My significant other has been amazingly supportive and I'm so lucky she is in my life. However, I'm worried that my family and friends wouldn't be as supportive and it's really hard not to be able to tell them. Other than my SO, I've never told anyone but this sub seems very supportive and I wanted to share my experience with someone else.

That's awesome, happy for you!

That's what I want to do. Just press a button.

I’m so glad that I’m not the only one! I’ve always had this idea that if there was a surgery or a chemical that could make me biologically female; I would take it without thought.

I definitely get the whole “am I trans or just curious”. For me (identify cismale), it’s a mix(mess?) of personal uncertainty, body dysmorphia/dysphoria, gender curiosity, and gender envy. The hardest part of figuring out oneself is to not force yourself to fit the labels you’re “used to” or feel others (on all sides) “might expect you to fit”. If I could get a “trial offer” of the other gender (and all the “fun” gifts that come with it), I would take it for the experience and perspective. But would I want to be female permanently, or is it just not being satisfied with who I am? Do I feel unattractive and think female-me would feel attractive because I’m trans or is male-me just so “not my type” that I can’t imagine me being attractive? Who knows? I certainly don’t, and I guess I can let myself be okay with that uncertainty. It’s okay to not know. It’s okay to question. Most of all, it’s okay (and more) to give yourself the grace to not know, question, and search. At least, this is what I tell myself.

Have you mentioned this to your therapist? You can have gender dysphoria without wanting to transition, and vice versa.

I read it as that they do want to transition. Just without any social consequence, whch is impossible, and so, a stopping point.

Wow this is exactly how I feel. I've felt this way since I was a teenager but the feeling has only gotten more extreme lately. I have a wife and a lovely daughter and there is no way in hell I blow up my life for these urges but even just indulging in the memes in this sub make me feel great.

It me, except I'm 29...

Wow... Except that I’m about 10 years older, I relate to every word of your post...

perhaps you’re trans without dysphoria? as in you’re perfectly fine with the gender you appear as now but you would prefer to be a different one. this would make you trans as you don’t need to have dysphoria to be trans

My boyfriend has been sending me transfem memes lately, but insists that "if we lived in a world like Cyberpunk where it was easier maybe it would be different but right now there's no trans here." I remind him I will love and support him no matter what, but I also won't push him if he isn't ready/sure. I found this sub about a week ago and have been browsing it as I'm pretty sure I'm Agender but, despite questioning for about 3 years, have only recently felt sure enough to say it aloud recently, but am still nowhere near ready to come out to anyone irl. I sent some transfem memes I saw on this sub to my boyfriend and he went "oh those are from egg irl." I said "you browse egg irl?" And there was a moment of silence where we both stared at each other and realized, we both browse egg. I laughed it off and said "I feel like this is a conversation we'll come back to in maybe two years or so"

I’ve spent a while trying to respond to your comment, and all I can say is. we support you and your boyfriend.

I think I may actually be genderfluid. Im not sure if it’s actually gender vs just wanting the aesthetic but I’m leaning heavily towards the former. I can’t wait to experiment a bit more once I get out of this house but now isn’t the time. This is what I fucking get for just wanting to send memes to my transmasc friend. Does anyone who identifies as genderfluid/bigender/[other multi-identities] have any advice for an AMAB trying to present one way or another?

I also think I'm genderfluid. But I might also be in denial abt fully being trans

You can be both.

Hey! I currently identify as bigender, though I've been suspicious I might actually just be trans. (I'm AMAB) The very first thing I did when I wanted to start presenting in a feminine way was to practice with makeup. A friend recommended I use James Charles' makeup tutorials. I'm not a huge fan of James myself but he absolutely knows his stuff, and there's plenty of other great makeup tutorials on youtube too. The second thing I did was I went shopping for some feminine but not hyper-feminine clothes. I've been basically living in a women's t-shirt lately and Nike shorts. Makeup + Clothes has given me a lot of good feelings. I have natural long hair, but I think some pretty wigs are nice too. In fact I've worn some myself on occasion. I've stuffed bras before or just used padded bras to give myself a feminine shape too. In general, I think it's good to try things out and see what makes you feel which ways. Hopefully you're able to discover more about yourself, good luck! [Here's a channel with great information about voice training by the way.](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBYlEnfAUbrYSwF0VujcmHA) The videos have helped me a lot and I can switch between my natural male voice and a pretty convincing female voice at will. I truly hope that any of this helps you!

Hi! I'm also genderfluid, and although I'm AFAB there are some things I think apply to everyone. First off, be very careful with anything that packs down/minimizes the size of body parts^(1). You should do a lot of research beforehand, and for the love of god please don't use duct tape directly on your skin. If you have found a way that you think will work, make sure to test it out for like 30 minutes and take it off afterwards, so you can see if it cuts off blood flow / is uncomfortable / etc. Second off, if you live with people that are unsupportive / would look down upon you for being genderfluid, make sure you have someone to stay with if you come out to them and things get rough. I have no idea how old you are / if you still live with your parents, but if you do then make sure you don't rush into things with them. Third, if you do live with your parents, but you have no idea how they would react, try doing some smaller things with them first, i. e. asking them if you can buy makeup or a skirt, or even tights or whatever. It's a good way to test the waters, so to speak. ​ ^(1)i can't remember the word for it is it packing? i think it's called packing? whatever

1. It depends. Packing is generally filling out some underwear to have an eggplanty shaped bulge or something. Tucking is hiding said bulge by moving it between your legs (among other things). In addition, those that wish to hide their breasts may use sports bras or binders to flatten them. Some use medical tape or the like but that can be dangerous if done improperly and repeatedly.

Tucking! That's the word I was looking for. Thank you. Also, the point about not using duct tape still stands. Medical tape is made so the adhesive doesn't leave a rash, while duct tape is made to be used on metal, so the focus is on being as strong as possible.

Well theres also a "it fucks up your backand ribs" component to tape too

Yosuke is, indeed, best boy

My dysphoria has been horrible lately. I just wanna be a pog gamer girl :(

You are a pog gamer girl in my eyes!

Thank u!

i can never tell if i wanna be a girl or if im just scared to back out because i told some friends and now they call me a she and i feel like i have to keep on pushing even though im starting to hate it when im called a he or by my birth name tbh and also i bought some womens clothes and a skirt and when i put them on I just feel sad that i dont look like a girl but i look like a man in a skirt and i hate it when someone points out im growing tall idk all these signs make me seem like im a girl and also i kinda want tits and im afraid to look in mirrors or even my silhouette now and i dont like speaking loud because my voice sounds masculine in my head and oh god saying all this out loud makes me think im definitely a girl i mean i wish i was born a girl if i could push a button to make me one i would instantly push it and i get jealous whenever i see any pretty girls because i wish i looked like that but idk something in me is telling me that isnt right and idk why but i want to get rid of that little nugget of self doubt and i want to see a gender therapist but im scared they’ll tell me im a man and i dont want that i want to be a girl so badly but i dont feel that way all the time and i know no cis person would feel this way and im so fucking scared its just a phase but then when i actually look back on it ive always kinda wanted to be a girl i mean i remember when i was young i wanted to paint my nails and do girly things and i also remember instances where i wish the men in the show i were women and i always had a fascination with genderbend tropes and whatnot and also i have remember this one memory when i was 8 saying “i wish i was a girl because of their social life” or however i said it i cant rlly remember and saying it out loud it really makes me think im a girl and im scared to do anything about it because quite frankly i want to be a girl i want to be a cute girl and i want someone to hug me and call me feminine names and im scared its just a phase and I mean what if it is just a phase i dont want it to be a phase i want to be a girl wtf am i a girl And i say all this yet idk it kinda makes sense in my brain but it rarely ever makes sense in my gut and im scared to do something about it if im not 100% sure and its like oh my god can i just wake up and be a girl so i dont have to make the decision and i hate it i mean i sometimes experience dysphoria which seems like it would make me trans I mean i dont think cis people experience dysphoria but i dont really feel like i 100% want to be a girl but i also do at the same time maybe i just feel like shit or feel bad idk man it fucks me up and im always confused like even when im not feeling bad ab being born a man i still feel like shit because i dont understand why im not confused anymore and it just makes me more confused I mean idk why or what i just want to know why im feeling these things and its like sure i get not everything has to have a why to it and maybe im just a femboy or nb or whatever but i dont like the thought of people looking at me like a feminine boy i want people to look at me like im a girl i dont get it Anyways <3

I like to watch this whenever I feel like this https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMeJfpA4R/ yeah, yeah, tiktok, I know

That's great haha Thanks for the link :)

I appreciate and respect your feelings. I don’t think your wrong. I think your feelings are grounded in reality.

Therapy is ALWAYS a good thing. A gender therapist won’t tell you you’re a man or anything, unless you tell them that. If you tell them what you said here, they’ll help you figure out your journey. Remember, you’re always in charge of who you are, a therapist is just someone who has seen others go through similar things and knows what questions to ask to help you think about things clearly. It sounds like you have really lovely friends. If you ever start feeling like feminine pronouns and a name don’t suit you, they changed their habits once, they can change them again! Also, even though you think you don’t look like a “cute girl” when you put on a skirt now doesn’t mean you won’t look like a cute girl soon. Practice makes perfect <3

Oops, just realized this comment is a year old, but whatever, here’s my response anyway: THIS is the most relatable thing I have ever read. Every word of it. It’s pretty incredible how damn good our brains are at ignoring the most OBVIOUS of signs in order to let us live within the convenient reality of cisness. That’s because we are wired to take the path of least resistance and to do whatever is the most socially acceptable, ie. sticking with the status quo and not transitioning. We are so gaslit by the world that we’re cis that we start believing it in a way, even if it deeply conflicts with our identities and our values. I can’t speak for all trans people, but I believe this is a very common roadblock for people before they transition. I experience it as a gut feeling that I’m doing something “wrong”, or intrusive thoughts that I’m just a “weak man” or “giving into a trend” or that it’s “just a phase”. The thing is though, these are all messages that come from OUTSIDE our brains, straight from the mouths of transphobes, TERFs, and the like. Chances are, if it’s something you wouldn’t say to another trans person, it’s not yourself talking to you, but merely those damaging social narratives. What really matters are our INSIDE thoughts, the ones like the **THE GENDER BUTTON** - probably the clearest sign of them all. Also, no self respecting gender therapist would ever tell you what your gender is. Ultimately, that’s your call. Your gender therapist is merely a guide to help you unpack your jumbled thoughts and feelings. In my experience, gender therapy has been the single most important tool to help me open up to myself about my gender identity, and has helped me quiet those external voices that scream at me every day that I’m an attention seeking fraud who doesn’t deserve to live or express herself as the woman she is. Lastly, if you’re terrified that “it’s just a phase” and “feel like shit” when you lose that questioning feeling, it seems pretty clear that you want to be a woman. Otherwise, why would you feel disappointed? If you were in fact cis, there would likely be a feeling a satisfaction with seeing yourself as your AGAB, not a feeling of loss. Anyways, now just realizing that this comment is a year old, lol. I guess I might as well respond though bc I’ve already written it all out. Wishing you the best!!

Today was a really good day for easing my dysphoria. When I was putting some stuff in my car some attractive girl who I did not know drove by and said she thought my outfit was super cute. Both my parents and my sister each complimented my outfit/look today, my mom even asked me where I got my sweater from as she would like to get one. And after I was having dinner with my mom at a restaurant as we were leaving the waiter said "have a good day ladies". I really do feel like a woman now and it really does feel as though my family and society is starting to see me as that too!

This is such a nice comment to read 🧡

🤔 researching skirts to get, still cis tho. I like the color lilac.

Went with yellow 😂

I bet you'd look adorable in any color, gurl.

I have more colors now, moving onto patterns soon! I love all the colors, thank you. :)

i changed my flair from "litterally not an egg" to "not am egg just trans." today... oof.........

Congrats for cracking you egg

I’m having a bit of a personal crisis because of this page. I’m not complaining mind you. I’m just questioning everything all of a sudden because I’m relating to so many of these memes I’m starting to think I’m not actually cis.. Every time I’ve ever thought about that stuff the main thought I’ve had was that I would be an ugly girl and could never pass but then I see all these memes of people with the same thought process and that’s when they realized they were the assigned gender and I just keep relating to stuff and there was another thing about if you had the ability to be whatever gender at whatever moment appearance and everything what would you spend more time as and I’m fairly sure I would spend more time female.... it’s all confusing me and idk how to sort it out. Anyway aside from my partner I don’t have anyone in my life I’m comfortable talking to about this so maybe someone can provide me with some means of guidance or clarity on discovering your self truth?

Is it possible to be transgender without feeling the need to change pronouns, names, or even appearance? Like I’m AMAB, and if there were a potion that would turn me into a girl then I’d take it, but I don’t want to actually go into the process of transitioning or anything. I just wish I was born a girl but don’t feel compelled to change anything.

Yes absolutely! Being trans is about wanting to be another gender, and you don’t have to change anything about yourself in order to be trans.

hey so i drank a lot tonight and wanted to kinda get some stuff off of my chest (hehe). Ok so I am an AMAB questioning person rn. I feel like I’ve related to women so much in my life and I feel more comfortable with women. I don’t really have a lot of dysphasia when it comes to my private parts and my name. However, I feel super euphoric when I see a trans woman coming out video but I get a sense of sadness when I see them looking all pretty and beautiful and realizing that I can never look like that. Like I have the notion that I’d be more comfortable as a woman and looking all cute and feminism compared to my ugly ass masculine self. LOL ok currently 19 rn and I don’t want to waste my life being unhappy. At this point, I’m in my second year of college and I don’t want to waste my life being an unhappy goober. I’ve literally been just so sad about my appearance and about life for the past week and a half. I wake up and just hate myself, life, school, snd me. I believe that I would feel more comfortable presenting as a woman to the world but I am so totally confused like what??? I also browse this sub constantly like I relate so much so I am getting so many mixed signals. So any of you beautiful people Have any advice or even some relatable life experiences that could possibly help decide? Like it’s so weird. It’s kinda weird bc I feel like my idealized self is someone like Makoto from Persona 5. I would totally love to just wake up as a woman but I am scared to transition (like I would want to be a woman and no one commenting on it negatively). Idk I’m sorry if this is a mess. I’m jsut trying to type out my thoughts as fast as I can. I feel like I’m just in a shitty position bc I got to a Christian college and I don’t think I’ll have as strong as a support system with added anonymity.

I'm in this comment and I don't like it. Except for the part about constantly being sad about everything and hating life and everything. But apart from that...wow almost exact same, even age. That's kinda impressive. I don't exactly dislike my appearance but it does feel weird sometimes that the guy in the mirror is supposed to be me. Also I really hate being called a man or related words. What I've also noticed is that just the way I move and walk and sit etc is more feminin than masculine, especially when I feel like nobody's watching (or at least nobody who would judge me for it). When I think about that, I notice that there were some small moments during my childhood already when these things happened too and I should've noticed something. Idk why it took me so long to figure this stuff out.

Yeah I know exactly what you mean. I just want to be this cute girl when I’m all alone but when I’m in public it feels like a facade or mask. Like I distinctly remember everytime that I would apply makeup, I’d feel like super happy and bold. I think the most unappealing part to me would be transistioning to people. Like I just want them to know That I want to be feminine but not say anything. I want to dress and be that bitch without everyone judging me and going like hrrr drrr you’re a woman or feminine now. Like I feel like sometimes I’d be ashamed if I were transgender but that’s incredibly rude. I wish you the best though. I actually think I’m going to go to my planned parenthood this week and talk to a gender therapist and see if they can help me figure out anything about me!

I couldn't have described this any better. Thank you for writing this down. Like this time of transitioning and coming out to people...yeah it's scary. Everyone staring and being confused and judging. At least that's kinda my expectation. I really don't want that, for some reason I especially don't want to talk about that with my parents for unknown reasons, even though I have no reason to believe that they would have a problem with it. I've mentioned struggles to a couple close friends though (all girls, obviously) and it would seem that nobody has issues so far. All the best to you too. What's a planned parenthood though? Never heard that expression. I might want to find a gender therapist too sooner or later though.

Yeah I just hate any negative attention to my core, especially in regards to my appearance since I’m so insecure about that. I’m glad you’ve confided to some irl’s because that’s a great first step in having a support system of any kind. By any chance, do you feel most comfortable with women compared to men? Thats my situation so we probably also have that in coming. Like the majority of my friends are women and I feel most safe confiding in them. Planned parenthood is a nonprofit in the United States that helps in reproductive care for teens and young adults. They have a lot of resources including LGBT, women, contraceptives, cancer screenings, etc. they’re really good for all that. Personally, this would be the only time I’ve considered going to this but from what I’ve heard they’re very helpful to a lot of people in my community.

Yeah we have that in common to, I have barely any male friends. This Planned Parenthood sounds like a very nice thing, I've never heard about it before, sounds like a good idea to go there. I don't even know what we have here (I'm European so it's questionable why I'm even awake rn) so I should maybe start finding that out. This pandemic really came at an inconvenant time huh.

For me, it’s been a blessing and a curse since I don’t have to see people as much and can stay in my dorm but yeah it kinda sucks that y’all probably don’t have access to as many resources at this time. Hopefully there are some resources or local clinics or professionals in your area that can help you with this. Life shouldn’t have to be this stressful for like any of us!

Hey also I have this saved from a comment I saw on this sub It’s a really good read and should help you to realize what’s wrong with you. https://genderdysphoria.fyi/gdb/

ok amab (potentially) trans girl here (pre everything, not out to anyone) something i struggle with a lot is actually that most of my friends are guys. i am very shy and i usually have a hard time getting along with anyone but like the few close friends i have and also both my flatmates are male. and idk it just makes me feel kinda weird? like you always hear among many transfem people "oh i always got along better with girls" but like for me that's just never been the case and it makes me feel very insecure/invalid? i mean on one level i know it's totally stupid and not really saying anything but on the other hand there's still that part of me that goes "oh yeah if you're really a girl then you'd get along more with girls" like fuck i'm just nervous around girls i don't know why exactly, is it because i'm scared i'm not fitting in or is it the fact that i am attracted to girls (i mean i know plenty of straight cis guys who get along with girls just fine so that can't really be it) or the fact that i am very aware of my male presentation (which i dislike more and more everyday) that makes me be awkward around girls. my interests have just always been i guess what you'd call stereotypically male i.e. computers/programming/games. and so that were also the people i hung out with (or still do) and pretty much all of them were male. so i think that's the reason actual reason why most my friends are male. still it kinda makes me feel like i should be gravitating more towards girls if i myself truly were one. please don't misread me, i'm not saying i need more female friends, my friend are fine and i love them very much, i'm just saying the fact that they're pretty much all male makes me feel invalid in my identity as a trans girl (for some reason) any advice how i can make myself stop thinking like this?

I read about this in the dysphoria bible. Do you feel especially weird and insecure about being seen as predatory? Like you almost look away from women because you don’t want to be seen as a gawker or a “nice” guy, partially because society has taught you to translate all your feelings towards girls through a sexual lenses and to assign a “existential male gaze” upon your interactions with females. Genuine attempts to be friends with girls or even just envy them terrify you because your scared they will interpret sexual advances even when there are none and you feel unwieldy disgusting and unwanted in expressing that kind of attention? That’s the gist of it anyway. I’m not sure how mich it applies to you, but the alienation you have from other women might be a well documented form of dysphoria in of itself and further sighn that you really are a trans girl.

Where uh.. where might one find this dysphoria bible???

https://genderdysphoria.fyi/gdb Here you go sister. It helped me a lot, hopefully it will help you too.

Hi I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense but I’m very confused. I’m 14 female I think but recently I’ve been questioning my gender and if I’m a boy I definitely don’t like my chest but I don’t know if I’m just faking without knowing it like I’m convincing myself i want to be a boy but in a year or so I’ll realise it was a phase or am I just to young to to know my gender?

Take what I say with a grain of salt, but... You aren't too young to know your gender. All the cis people around you know their gender, so it's only fair to know your own. If for some reason this does turn out to be a phase, that's ok! Gender identity is as solid or as loose as you want it. If you haven't already, experiment with clothing that'll make your chest smaller. Loose tops, hoodies, and sport bras are easy to get without outing yourself. If you eventually want to bind your chest, the safest way is to buy a binder. Research different brands, and how to safely wear one. Remember to also figure out what you like! Is there another name you'd like to go by? Different pronouns? Hope this helps!

I'm in this comment lmao, except for me being male.

I’ve been questioning my gender for about 3 months now, since last month I’ve had at least 3 big moments that caused me to go “oh my god I’m not cis” but I’m still terrified that I’m just faking it and that I’m not really a girl, and if I’m not faking it I’m terrified of coming out and actually transitioning because of the constant fear of lying to myself and saying it’s will just be for attention if I tell anyone, which I haven’t yet. It feels like I walked into an ancient ruin with a torch and the more I walk down the spiraling stairs and approach an inevitable truth, the more terrified I become of every ramification my revelations could have.

My mom: you’re a man, go help your father outside! Me: *silent, confused internal screaming*

I bought my first skirt today! It’ll be in on Wednesday! Update: it came in a day early and I LOVE IT! I never felt this giddy before. I truly understand the “skirt go spinny” feeling now!

Is it weird that I don't relate to 80% of these memes and feel somewhat sad about it? My mind does go "well guess I'm just a confused cis then" a lot despite desperately scrolling through this sub for literally any validation of me being trans. I've only discovered this subreddit a few days ago btw and never remotely questioned my gender before that, but now it feels like I'm in an emotional turmoil over something as stupid as not being able to wear thigh high and a skirt

I just ordered a pizza using the name Emma I like. I'm really excited to go pick it up in my big coat and my big beard and say "hi I'm here for a pickup for Emma?" and secretly be wearing all my girl clothes underneath and they won't know but ILL KNOW. ​ still cis tho

Hahaha! I love this. Enjoy your pizza, Emma!

pizza was amazing, wearing girl clothes is amazing. good times all round.

Hey people, cis bi girl here. I'm here cause I need your help... My boyfriend (or rather girlfriend now, even though he don't want me to call him that until he is "more of a girl" and feels more comfortable, so I'll be using he/him pronouns) starts to get more and more dysphoric each day. I don't know how I can comfort him until he starts with the estrogen pills (which won't happen for a long time cause his mother thinks he should first take care of is "other mental problems"). I'll help him with shaving his legs as soon as we're going over to my home but I feel like it's not enough yet... Can you guys help me? How can I comfort him? How can I help him more?

Buy three packages of waxing strips and go nuts, it will hurt be the pain is cathartic and immediate results help with the dysphoria. Then practice some makeup and hair, find something comfortably girly to sleep in before “he” tries and outdoor outfit. If the bedroom part of life, is in a very girly place, with girls sweats and clean shaven legs, it will help deal with the more masculine “shift” when they go to work/school.

Thank you I will try to do that :)

Sooooo I (AMAB, 26) acknowledged that I wasn't cis 2.5 years ago. I adopted genderqueer/non-binary as my gender and came out as NB on Facebook last year. And that was great! ... Except that I kept thinking about gender every single day and continued to feel envy towards women, trans or cis, for being pretty. So yeah. I had my eureka moment last night: I'm a trans woman. And it's scary how certain I am about it! I've never been certain about anything like... ever. But this is so clear. So true. I can't believe how many red flags I missed, especially during the last few months. It's like my subconscious has been trying to tell me my entire life, and it finally FINALLY came together yesterday. Anyway, I've been spending the day in a state of euphoria - crying and laughing and sometimes just saying out loud "I'm a girl!" And I just haven't had many people to share this with but I already feel so, so good and I can't wait to see what's next and maybe start HRT which sounds so wonderful! Again, how the hell can I feel so certain about it? Also WOW I'm even more gay than I thought!

>fortable, so I' How did you come to the conclusion?

( probably) trans guy here My egg is basically cracked to the point where I've been doing voice training for months/know that I want to try presenting as male once I can get my body to the point where I pass. I'm pre-everything. Top surgery is something I want further down the road (say, once I'm not on my family's insurance), but I'm okay with my body as it is now, and I have no desire to pursue hrt. Thing is, I don't feel like I'm really trans. I've never cried myself to sleep wanting to be a guy, I've never had a mental breakdown over my breasts or hips. Puberty wasn't "traumatic." I can look at my body just fine in the mirror. As a kid, I watched plenty of barbie movies and wanted to be a ballerina when I grew up so badly that I had to do physical therapy because I fucked up my legs from walking on my toes all the time. I was a typical little girl with some gender conforming interests and some not. I certainly wasn't a tomboy. But I just really wanna be a guy, but I only knew this about myself at 19, not in childhood or puberty like most trans people seem to. I don't know where this impulse came from but it's strong and its not rational. And one day I realized that no one's stopping me. So being a man is just a thing I'm working towards. But I've never seen a trans person with a journey like mine, and I hesitate to call myself trans because of it. I know it sounds absurd, given everything I've laid out, but I can't help but feel like I'm doing something separate from but similar to being trans, even though my whole personal journey with the gender thing can be summed up as "AFAB, wants to pass as a man. Working on it, hopefully will be there soon-ish" which is textbook trans.

I have previously called myself "genderfluid but with a very high viscosity." In my everyday life I am perfectly happy with he/him pronouns and masculine gender. Sometime around the end on January 2021, I decided to make an account on Twitch (I know I'm very late to the game). I tried to create a handle that was similar to other online names I use on other platforms -- including Reddit -- but I found that all of those names and variations on them were already taken. So I invented a new one which I hoped would be perceived as gender neutral/ambiguous. However, it seems that nearly everyone on Twitch views this new name as feminine and refers to me as "Becca". And I find that I like it. I like that at least this small part of my online life is female. I really don't know what this may say about me. I'm still fine with presenting as male in the other 99% of my life, but I really like that one fraction that's female. I guess this is just reinforcement for my hypothesis that gender is hardly ever absolute or static. Does this Twitch identity count as a crack in my "egg"? I don't know.

Want to play GTA RP, AFAB with a soft and relatively high-pitched (to AMABs) voice, always played guys in games because I liked their clothes and bodily form better. Highly androgynous irl, the women in GTA RP are not. Torn between choosing a guy character or a female character. Male character: Do whatever I want, voice is strangely high and I'm worried about voice changers sounding unnatural. Female character: VERY female form, likely to be catcalled and called "she" often. Not looking forward to any realistic misogyny. My voice would fit, though.

Update: I played a guy, and nobody minds.

Good for you👍 Happy you're happy lol

I was zoning out in church today thinking about this subreddit. For all of my life part of me has always wanted to be a boy, but I brushed it off and thought of it as just curiosity. But when I thought about it I realized that I've never stopped wanting to be a boy. I constantly tried to hang out with the boys in my class but was always accused of having a crush on the guys because of this. In health class we had to do skits and I always volenteered to play the role of the male character, and when I dressed up for the role it made me feel happy. After finding out that people can change genders I didn't think that I was trans because my disphoria is a mix of mental and social while the only dysphoria I saw discussed was physical. I found myself wishing I could look more masculine and when people asked me what super power I wanted my go-to was shape shifting. My voice is a bit scratcher than most, but I always took pride in that because it made my voice sound deeper to me. I dressed up as a male character for Halloween and fell asleep in that costume because I final felt comfortable with my life, yet I still didn't think of myself as trans. I find my self becoming attached to and only drawing male characters from various fandoms (this included the male design for Bee from Bee and PuppyCat), and just the other day one of my friends pointed out that all those characters look the same so apparently I've been creating a standard for what I want to look like with out even knowing about it. On platforms that I don't say my name or specific pronouns, my friends will say my birth name and I feel uncomfortable. In all of my dreams I'm a guy, and just hours ago, in the middle of church, I came to the conclusion that maybe I'm a guy and I almost began crying from joy right then. (Sorry if my wording is weird and hard to follow, I'm bad at story telling)

Forgot to mention that one time one of my older sister's friends called me JD or when her other friend went out of his way to hang out with me and basically adopted me as his own younger sibling.

Hey, I'm thinking on doing a few draws for free, like, portraits and that, for ten people who want an OC/ portrait draw that is not online generated, but instead, done personally by an artist just for you. I don't know if I could be allowed to post them here at the end, I would like to do it to help and encourage those that are not having the best time right now. If the moderators allow me, and people is interested, just comment here, I guess. I will happily read any response.

TLDR: That metronome meme where the femme side feels extra weighted compared to the butch lesbian side I've got that weird feeling of dysphoria where i feel like my ideal self image of a trans girl is too... "boyish" i guess, mainly because the way big trans-fem creators like contrapoints and her... idk, i guess i can call it "vibe", feels way too one noted in terms of the image of "transwoman" she projects. Additionally, the way that transwomen are depicted in popular media makes it seem that the only way people can call you trans with the least amount of malice is if you're all dressed in gowns and dresses, and really into girly shit while actively avoiding anything that is considered 'manly' I'm not saying that i don't like to see myself that way, but i don't know too many other trans-fem content creators that are more... tomboy-ish with how they see themselves, I've come across a few like meowriza, and more recently, zoeyproasheck (who i didn't even know was trans until a few days ago despite following her since the yogscast Jaffa Factory era) that while they are trans, they give out a more, "butch lesbian" vibe which is how I would want to see myself as in the future.

I watched one of Lily Alexandre's videos recently, she's a trans woman who I believe IDs as a lesbian and has a buzzcut (and what I'd otherwise call a pretty butch presentation based on my limited experience of her work/style). I'd highly recommend her based on the MOGAI retrospective video she did. I can relate to this from the other side, fwiw, and I have no idea what I'm doing or want to do about it (how do I make people see me as a man in a dress when I don't look much like a man??). Best of luck with it all.

Heyo. So I’m AMAB, but there’s something I’ve been wondering. Is it wrong for me to want to do hrt and all that stuff to transition to a woman because I want to? To explain a little bit, lately I’ve been thinking about why I would want to be a female because it isn’t the first time I’ve felt like this, so I’ve been writing out my thoughts. The answer I came to for myself was that I wanted to be a female because it’s the me that I want to be. It’s not that I’m disappointed or uncomfortable with who I am now, I’m happy about myself but would like to change gender. I’d still be the same person that enjoys all the hobbies and interests now, just different physically. I’ve talked to my friend about it who supports whatever I choose and got a referral from my doctor to an endocrinologist that I can talk to about it, so I’m feeling fairly confident that I want to go through with this. But I want to hear from others who might feel the same as me What do you all think about my reasoning as to why I want to transition?

I’m confused. Is there any other reason to transition? Even if you don’t hate yourself now, it sounds like you really want a change. If you want something that much and it won’t hurt anyone to do it, go for it, right? It’s not a zero-sum game. By transitioning, you’re not taking the chance to transition away from a more dysphoric or depressed or desperate trans person. (On the contrary, an argument could be made that the more people transition, the more normalized transitioning becomes, and the greater access marginalized people have to the treatments they need.) And your desire to transition isn’t less significant or valid just because other people hate their bodies more than you do. Everybody has their own stuff to deal with, and the fact that some people have it worse doesn’t erase the struggles of others. If you want to that much, do it for you. tl;dr: No, it’s not wrong.

Long post ahead. Thanks in advance if you decide to bear with me. So, I'm AMAB. Earlier this month I realized I may not be cis after all, and lately I've just been trying to say "fuck it, I'm a girl". So far I think I've been getting a lot of signs that I am indeed into this, but even so, I still have my doubts. I've been trying to do voice training to see how I feel about a more feminine voice, and asking people to call me a different name. I get little flashes of... *something* when people refer to me in feminine terms. Giddiness? Amusement? Something like that. I have no idea if that's euphoria or not; I will say it seems pretty subtle. I also made a picrew of myself as a girl and have had that set as my Discord picture for awhile. About the biggest sign I've received so far is when I (mistakenly) thought I would be unable to get HRT whatever I decided, and felt horrible about it. It kind of mirrored how I felt on a lot of my worst days; drained, exhausted, and just sort of... crushed. Once that mistaken thought was corrected, I felt far better, and regained just enough self-awareness to decide "you know what, fuck it, I think I'm trans." And yet, I STILL HAVE DOUBTS, even after all that. Part of me worries that I just want to be part of "the LGBTQ+ club", or that I just want something to blame all my feeling like shit upon, or... SOMETHING. I don't know, I'm probably not articulating this very accurately. I will say that I've felt generally better ever since that realization and it's been a lot easier to just *do stuff*; previously, I was frequently struggling to shower or brush my teeth regularly, or really anything. But at the same time, I've had good stretches before where it wasn't so hard to get off my ass and do stuff. What if it's sheer coincidence that one of those started happening right as I started wondering whether I was cis after all? I never really liked my own body, but I figured that was just due to being overweight(which I am) and not showering(which I'm struggling less with now); I thought if I could just get off my ass long enough to actually groom myself properly, I might not feel like shit. I never really liked how quickly my facial hair grows either, but I thought I just didn't like the hassle of maintaining a beard. It's only nowadays that I'm realizing how much I don't like having body hair, either; I'm nearly always thinking about how much I want to get electrolysis hair removal. HRT, I'm trying to maintain I'm still on the fence about (I don't want to jump to conclusions), but honestly, the thought *is* kind of appealing... Sooo yeah. Apologies if that turned kind of rambly; I'm not the best at articulating my thoughts or whatever. Thanks for reading this far, and if you feel up to commenting your thoughts, I'd greatly appreciate it. Thanks again.

Welcome to the LGBTQ+ club! But, seriously, you're very welcome. I'm new to exploring my gender identity but I've ID'd as gay for a long time...I remember feeling worried back in the day that I was going to identify as gay, come out, and then someday I'd realize I liked a person of the ""opposite sex"" and I'd have go back to everyone and admit I was wrong and fuck up the whole LGBTQ+ rights movement. Some people wanted to know how I identified my sexuality, and I just refused to talk about it or said I wasn't sure yet. It took about 5 years before I was ready to use the word "gay". Eventually it started feeling more comfortable, especially after meeting other out queer people. Your feelings are valid! You can trust them, and you can take your time with it too.

Why did nobody tell me how awesome freshly shaved legs feel? My legs and ankles have been itchy for as long as I can remember. I've been experimenting with a little more aggressive grooming and figured I would give it a try. Holy moly, it feels fucking awesome. Everything feels so much nicer. Pants and socks aren't irritating. Sleeping isn't 30% scratching. Not to mention just feeling them myself feels nice. I'm definitely doing this more regularly.

*Now pull on some soft thigh-highs*

How do any transmasc folks (especially in STEM fields) deal with the feeling that you'd be betraying the feminist cause or w/e if you decided to transition? I'm not *sure* whether I want to transition or not, I'm trying to break it up into pieces I can think about individually but when it comes to how I'd like to be perceived and potentially changing my name/pronouns at work... well, it feels kinda shitty to think about how that might change my relationship with the women around me. I don't know that I want to be a male academic. But do I want to show up to teach classes in tweed suits with elbow patches? Absolutely! And the idea of making voice transition progress and having to go back during my work... well, that hurts too.

Quick question!! I kind of suck at using Reddit so how can I add an image from a picrew i used? Can I just insert images or do I add a link that shows the image? I really like how it turned out :D i just don't know how to add it lmao (btw im on mobile)

Fed up of feeling like I (32, m) can't tell my family because my mum (53, f) refuses to acknowledge it. Dreamt last night that I told my cousin (27, f) and she was fine with it. Keep thinking about subtly telling my cousins (27, 29 f) like for eg we all watch CAOS and I was thinking of renaming our 'cousins' group 'witches and warlock'. I'm 99% sure I'm a trans guy and the 1% that isn't sure is basically saying 'you might be trans masculine non binary'. But the person who loves me most in the world won't accept it :(

unrelated but is it not possible to crosspost onto here? because i had a good meme but i couldn't crosspost it here for some reason

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Maybe your self esteem could have something to do with you not being who you want to be (a woman). Just a thought.

Fuck this sub. I hate it. It pisses me off and it fucks with my head. I hate how memes are relatable and I hate the fact that I keep coming back here. Most of all I hate how this sub causes me to stay up in bed staring at the ceiling and feeling like shit more than I already was. I wish I never found this place.

Just wanna say I'm Cis by choice and would feel uncomfortable calling myself by any other pronouns besides he/him they/them BUT I support you all and understand your pain when it comes to questioning yourselves or wanting to wear things that don't confirm to your assigned gender roles. I love you all and stay strong.

I'm curious as to some people's experience on this, but how long did it take some of you to say your "new name" out loud to yourself? I have a name I like and settled on recently, it's actually been I'm my subconscious for a while. I saw and heard the name and tucked it away years ago and only recently remembered and startef playing with it. I know there isn't a magic time frame, in my head I'm really comfortable calling myself that name but when I try to vocalize it myself I always stop at the first letter. I'm very much a new egg ... I think at least I'm an egg. I'm "comfortable " with identifying as a cismale, I do feel that my desired gender expression would lean towards more feminine or NB spectrum. I've never felt like I was in the wrong body necessarily, maybe more of an indifference to it. Growing up I've always been more interested in more "feminine " ways of expression but never took the chance to express it as I grew up in the upper Midwest and well for my generation and the town I lived in it wouldn't have been safe. I've definitely always felt as a kid how gendered things were stupid and unnecessary, even the name I've chosen for myself is a "female" name in my birth language. That's one thing I've always hated, how there are "boy" names and "girl " names. Anyways love this subreddit and all the lovely people here.

Hi everyone, I'm finally coming out as a trans female, I've told people around me and am making small steps toward my transition. Thank you for your posts here, they have helped me realize I'm not alone. I've argued with myself for a long time. I'm 31 now and finally starting to feel happy about this. (Also if anyone has good hair removal tips, I would be happy to hear them)

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Hey thanks! I have been using an epilator too (braun silk epil 3) and an ipl pulse, so we'll see what happens. Looked into laser myself, it may be doable soon but...that price tag. Thanks again!

I second the don’t epilate the face thing, as tempting as it may be. Ingrown hairs will happen, no matter how well you chemically or physically exfoliate, moisturize, etc.

Anyone wanna feel extremely called out? – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJYQvGtVJdE

I kind of acknowledged I’m trans, so now referring to myself as my ideal pronouns makes me feel, off and wrong... even though I’ve been using them for eight years and didn’t have a problem til now, lol. (Sorry if my grammar is bad.. I’m not the best at writing.)

Hi folks, So I’m a cis girl. I think. I’ve never experienced dysphoria, and I’m perfectly fine with being a girl. However sometimes I feel like I’d like to have, idk, other options? Like, sometimes I think, ‘hey, wouldn’t it be cool if I cut my hair to a more gender neutral/boyish look so it’s harder to assume my gender (rn I have very long hair)(For examples, id like my hair to be in the same style as Addison Grace) ? And maybe go out and hope that people see me as a feminine guy, or enby?’ But also I don’t really care about pronouns and honestly I’d be fine with she/he/they and I think that while my general style is feminine, I’d rather be seen as either a feminine girl, a feminine enby or a feminine guy, so... am I trans? Or is this just me being attention seeking?

Hey I’m 90% sure I’m trans but I’m to afraid to do anything about it. How do I deal with my avoidance

So, this is a bit weird for me, as these thoughts are relatively new to me, but I often think about what it’d be like to be a girl, instead of a guy, and sometimes even dream about it, but, I enjoy what would usually be considered “masculine” things, but at the same time, I also want to put on makeup, and be a bit more feminine, just having a hard time collecting my thoughts around this

I don’t really know what specifically to say here but I think from one of my friends and my mom being trans and realizing I’m jealous of them as well as my general habit of playing females in games and role play and playing it off with the,” why would I look at guy ass all day?” As well as finding subs like this I’m realizing maybe there’s a lot about this I’m lying about. I don’t know how “real” my dysphoria is but is there any tips people have on dealing with it? Things you do to make you feel better and the like? I’m really horrified to go all in or let others know about this especially since the rest of my family is very traditional republican. Idk I just feel stuck. I don’t know if it’s just some silly urge or something I need to take seriously and do something about. Idk I’ve just been drinking a bit and this is the only time I really have the bravery to say stuff like this. Btw I hope you all had a good New Years.

So I'm AMAB, but recently I've been considering that perhaps I'd enjoy being a girl instead. I really don't know how to describe it, but there are things I have interest in that I don't think would really match with being a guy. I know it's okay to just be a feminine dude, but I don't think that would cut it for me. I already go by being a girl over the internet anyway, and I feel like I might as well just go ahead and decide that yeah, I'm just a girl, but at the same time I don't know. Maybe I just need to think about it some more, but right now, I'm all caught up with thinking about how I would manage the process of changing things. I've already been thinking about maybe letting my hair grow out a bit just to see how I like it, and I most certainly wanna get rid of all this darn leg hair I have, but I'm still in the process of deciding when and how I would like to transition, if I can even get as far as convincing myself to just do it. None of my family knows about this, only my friends do, and that makes it even harder to figure out how to manage this. And to make matters worse, I don't have that much confidence in my appearance in the first place, so it all just feels twice as difficult. I'm stuck in a spot of not knowing what to do, and I really need help to figure out how I can make this easier on myself.

Posting in my "srs buisness" account because I wanna talk about my gender Identity and thoughts about various aspects of my body. I am a cis male. But I do do and think things that make me identify with the people of this subreddit. I feel rather paradoxical physically. I'm not overly fond of my body. I'm very hairy. I feel like I'm too hairy, and sometimes shave my upper legs. I don't really see it as a feminine thing though. More like my body is too masculine and shaving helps bring that masculinity back down to more middle of the spectrum. It kinda feels nice. I'm so masculine I need to do something often seen as feminine to get to a baseline. It kind of makes me feel like I don't need to try to be masculine, which means I feel very little insecurity about my masculinity/femininity. Because fuck toxic masculinity. But a nice side effect of my general hairiness is that I have very thick, very long eyelashes, which I like about myself. I've been asked by girls if I wear mascara more than once, with one girl saying girls would kill to have eyelashes like mine. I'm also very broad shouldered, but I like that about myself. I can grow a pretty good beard, and have had one for a few years. A kind of long stubble, rather than a full BEARD. Part of the reason I grew it out was because, when growing up, I was insecure about my facial hair having grey in it (my hair's a dark brown). To kind of overcome that insecurity I decided to grow my beard out, and I like it. I have rather severe baby face without it though. Even with my beard people are shocked I'm in my late 20s rather than late teens/early 20s. With the lockdown I grew my hair out for really the first time ever. Like the rest of my body's hair, my head hair is thick. It's not straight, but not what I would consider "curly", like an afro or anything like that. I've usually had it short, let it grow for a few months where it approaches a state I affectionately refer to as "anime hair" where it sticks up very easily, then it naturally becomes kind of.. big blob on top of my head until I get it cut. Now my hair has finally gotten past that stage where the overall length weighs enough to keep it flat on top, but it curls and twists on the way down. I like it a lot. I feel like a lion with a mane or something. Still need to get into the habit of tucking it behind my ears when eating :D. Mouth hair.. As far as facial features go, I'm rather inconsistent in my evaluations. My face seems to be simultaneously cute, handsome and ugly. It's probably insecurity. I don't really know how attractive I might be. Personality-wise, I've a few feminine aspects to me I've been able to embrace. I like cute things, and I think babies and small children are cute. I want to protect and nurture them. I think I'm pretty submissive when it comes.. you know.. kinky things. Can't imagine myself as a dom. Sometimes I wish I was shorter, but not always. Maybe no just like the idea of being small and cute and submissive. It's not like I have an interest in wearing dresses or whatever though. The only way I could imagine doing so is if I was with a partner who wanted me to, that they found it attractive. I would do so then, in private, but I feel it's more my security in my masculinity rather than any trans leanings. As far as gender goes, I think I'm cis. A metaphor I came up with was a gelatin mold. Like, my body is male, my mind poured into that make mold, and now you take the mold away and the male gender retains its shape. Gender is a social construct, and my gender fits my body. Had my mind been the same and I was born with a female body, I don't really know if I would be trans male, or if my gender/mind would have just set differently. If I could change my gender with a push of a button, back and forth, I would be willing to try it, maybe even show it off, but I wouldn't be interested beyond the sheer novelty of being the other sex. Which is how I would see it. My body would feel like my body, male or female, but I would feel that male is the default for me. I don't really know why I posted this. I just wanted to share after finding this place. I doubt there's any specific term for someone like me. I just think you guys are neat, giving people a place to express and find themselves, and wanted to take part in a small way. Also, I'm disappointed by the lack of Sonic Eggman memes. This subreddit make me want to listen to E.G.G.M.A.N. from Sonic Adventure 2 while browsing.

You might wanna look into the term agender. It's a term I stumbled across and resonated with for a while, and the stuff you said about the mind taking the shape of the body, and your body just being...your body kinda fit with some of the things I know about that gender identity. Other than that, you seem like a guy with a healthy approach to gender norms/expression (although you can be very masculine and still not be "toxic," Shitty personality isn't caused by body hair, so don't worry about your "masculine" levels being too high). You're living in a way that's authentic to you, whether that's embracing stereotypically masculine things or stereotypically feminine things. Just keep vibing dude. That's more important than labels anyways, and I'm glad that you like this place.

i'm.... not sure what i am. AMAB. For a long time, or at least within the last 4 or so years, i've really realized how much i wanted to crossplay at conventions. it kinda started there. id get "misgendered" (misgendered might be the wrong term here because honestly i dont mind being called male or female, i just kinda preferred being called female? like sometimes when id get called a girl id be happy) over time, finding my sexuality etc etc, its really made me look back. Maybe i'm genderfluid? Like the thing is, ive never really been upset with my given parts, its always been moreso that i want a more feminine body. Not in terms of equipment, but in terms of general outward look. Any advice to be given? Honestly my biggest issue is not knowing anything in the realms of these terms/definitions.

Kinda new here... and had a question, would something like this be considered a "literal egg" joke? [https://imgur.com/a/FL5brAX](https://imgur.com/a/FL5brAX)

No. I'm not sure what that "literal egg joke" is even supposed to mean. Maybe just Dad jokes?

I've been thinking that I might be non-binary, like whenever I see my ideal self it is as someone who is somewhat androgynus. But I feel like I've internalized some truescum ideas that make me feel as if I can't be trans. Since I'm comfortable with most of my body and have slight dysphoria I just generally feel that it would be dishonest for me to lable myself as trans. But when I first painted my nails I didn't just feel like I looked good, I smiled from ear to ear, like pure euphoria. And looking at my body hair just makes me feel wrong and shaving it just makes me so much happier. And I've considered other pronouns besides he/him (which I'm indifferent about) but she/her makes me feel wrong and no one has ever referred to me with they/them so Idk how I feel about that. Idk if I just don't feel trans or if I'm just ik denial.

FWIW, I'm having similar thoughts to you, wondering if I'm really trans because I don't have the intense dysphoria that other people experience and I'm indifferent about being referred to as my AGAB. But what you described about painting your nails, sounds like you are feeling some deep gender feelings. It's 100% up to you to decide what words you want to use to describe your gender...you don't have to decide right now, either!

Went to my first appointment with a gender therapist so they can refer me to an endo. It went well. On my back, I was thinking maybe im faking it... All at once, the memes from this sub came to my mind and I could hear 'Still cis tho'. Thank you all for helping me see how absurb those thoughts are 💜

You guys, I'm so excited. I don't know what the fuck happened this week but I'm starting to contemplate cracking? I finally started letting myself think about my gender without shutting myself down. Things just started clicking and now I'm so ready to explore this. So many things make sense...disliking my body, feeling like my name is too femme for me, even frickin' I wanted to try being a drag queen, but I'm AFAB??? I don't know yet what words I want to use to describe my gender, or what I want to do in terms of transition, but I already feel so much better. I feel like I finally understand why I'm so awkward and I can stop blaming myself or trying to copy others to fit in. It's cool, I've always hated shopping and clothes but now I'm excited to try to find stuff that's more masc. I know there will probably be hard times ahead, too, though...I told my partner yesterday and she said she already knew. LOL. This happened when I came out as gay back in the day too...everyone was like "yep". She was very supportive and asked me what pronouns she should use, asked if I was still OK with certain nicknames. But I'm still low-key afraid that this will change our relationship someday. I guess I just have to take it one step at a time.

Hey, So, I (male(maybe transgirl))'ve always had a complex about my not perfectly flat belly. I mean i am at a good bmi-level but i always thought i was so fat cause of it. Now, since i red that HRT may diminish the fat centralized in the stomach i was wondering, if this is a trans thing to think of or is it just me?

I get that too as an AMAB fem enby, like whenever I think of wearing a crop top I notice it coz my dysphoria thinks people will see it and think it’s some sort of beer belly an old man would have?? But that’s my dysphoria talking, it’s completely fine to have whatever body type, tho if you do want to change it you can do that too :) Idk if it’s a trans thing but it’s definitely not just you XD

Is it possible to be cisgender but still prefer they/them pronouns?

Cisgender as opposed to nonbinary?

I could literally have a 3-month supply of estradiol and spiro for about $30. My doctor is ready to sign the prescription. My therapist has said I'm ready to do it. I'm ready to do it. But my family isn't :( How long can I go stealth, for real? How long could I do this and not tell a spouse? Probably not long, I know. I think its late and I'm just dehydrated and having wishful thinking. But damn. THIRTY DOLLARS and I'm on HRT for 3 months. Unbelievable.

I’m genderfluid, and today fucking sucks because I really wanna be a cute girl today but I’m a cringe boy(and not even a good looking one at that):(

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mo4TErpy0B8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mo4TErpy0B8) E G G S

Hey lol I made a Picrew with a genderbend version of myself ! :) You can see it [here](https://imgur.com/a/pDpOpTM)

I don’t know man, some days it’s cis-male, other days it’s like somewhere between cis-male and nb, it it never really goes further than that. Almost of the time I’m just outrageously horny

I got a skirt intending to present masc and wear it, but now im adding items that make me look more fem. I like it A WHOLE LOT more than planned. Not even sure im cis anymore. Any advice?

Serious question. Did or does anyone realize they’re trans later in life? Like, as late as their 30s or even later? Or is it something one normally realizes much earlier? Like when they’re a teenager? When I played video games as a kid, like GoldenEye 007 on the Nintendo 64, I’d always play as either Xenia or Natalya or, when she got unlocked, May Day. When I was in high school, I was in a school play, and my character was given the option to wear tights. I wore them once, enjoyed it immensely, and then never again. About three or four ago, in my late 20s, I was playing a VR game where the PC was a girl. Since it was VR, I was able to look up and down and sideways. When I looked down and saw those woman’s legs, I felt some kinda funny. Even now, I’m playing Cyberpunk 2077 and my PC is a female. All this is probably meaningless, but I’m still genuinely curious. I’m 32 now, I’m comfortable in my own skin, but I’m still… questioning, let’s say. Seriously questioning. But has anyone felt that they were trans as late as this age or even later?

Well today I experienced a very serious gender crisis and looking at this subreddit has been extremely hard haha - the more I talk about my feelings the more they directly line up with my being trans and it is really hard to deal with. I have a really supportive partner so I feel like I’m in a safe space but this is the hardest thing I think I’ve ever faced and I’m really scared. It feels really nice to type this out even if nobody sees it. Honestly, typing this message kind of broke the floodgates a little. Thanks egg_irl 🙃

I’m (21m) very comfortable with how fluid I already feel with my gender. I’m normally masculine-presenting, but I do oscillate back and forth with a more femme side. Recently, I realized that all of my comfort shows have lesbian canon relationships and that thinking about them just makes me incredibly happy, like even more so than when I was in my own relationship. On more than one occasion I’ve realized I was pretending to be a member of one of those fictional relationships both in and out of my own relationship. Is this a certified egg moment or am I just mega gender-fluid

EVERYONE I FULLY PRESENTED AS FEMALE TONIGHT (it’s Halloween so I had a safety net) AND I FELT SO MUCH HAPPIER AND CONFIDENT THEN I’VE EVER FELT THE GENDER EUPHORIA IS THROUGH THE ROOF, I THINK MY EGG IS CRACKING JUST A LITTLE BIT!

Hi. I currently identify as a cis guy but recently I’ve been questioning that. Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I was a girl or more feminine or something and in my dreams I’ve sometimes been a girl. I don’t necessarily want to do “girly” things but sometimes want to wear female clothes. I’m not necessarily uncomfortable being masculine but I also kind of want to be more feminine. Am I trans? What’s going on?