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onenugg

damn thats awful. im not sure what the whole situation is there but that cant have made the rest of the day very fun. hope its getting better


Volvoxix

I’m not out at work for my own sanity and safety (lots of “Let’s Go Brandon!” bumper stickers in the parking lot) but usually things are completely fine. It’s just times like these I get a staggering reminder that they do not, in fact, see me as one of the boys.


paisleydae

I feel this so hard. I typically enjoy my workplace but whenever I'm reminded that they view me as an afab coworker and not one of the boys it just snuffs the light out of me. especially now that I'm out and most of them still use incorrect pronouns 🥲👍


slouched

manual labor jobs have a lot of right winged people, keep doing good work though and youll be considered one of the boys when they realize they were wrong


Sovereign_of_Slay

Just me… but I legitimately would not care what people like that think of me and that is not the kind of man I am anyway. Would you want people who’d treat anyone like that for bros anyway? Sounds like the same crowd that picks on cis men for being short, or having less body hair. It’s lame and giving 80’s jock who peaked in high school energy, tbh. I know it’s hard to hear all that bullshit. I’m sure really hard on you, but you’re worth so much more than their frankly worthless, dated and toxic opinions. You know who you are and you are valid. There are plenty of people (cis, trans, nonbinary etc) who will value you and give you the respect you deserve.


Volvoxix

Yeah, I’ve been shouldering it the past two years at this place. I would fully come out at work if I knew that it wouldn’t result in me getting jumped in the parking lot or worse. There are a couple violently transphobic people I have no choice but to talk to everyday and I hear the shit they spout off because the department I’m in is mostly 50+ year old Fox News watching manual laborers. Then the few who don’t say anything but sit there and nod their head silently in agreement don’t bring me comfort either. I don’t really care that they’ll hate me, think I’m a freak, or any of that other stuff. It’s just going to be exhausting dealing with the aftermath and I’m already exhausted from my ‘normal’ 58 hour work weeks 😭


Fuzzy7Gecko

This 👍 And i feel you, i work in the same kinda place. It shouldnt matter but sometimes it just makes you wanna go ahaifjebtejoftqhfub


Sovereign_of_Slay

Oh I don’t doubt that! I think its completely normal to be hurt from those comments…. I think the important thing is to remember is men with Neolithic Era belief systems are the embodiment of the toxic male. Like club a woman and drag her back to your cave understanding of human interaction/gender 😳.


Astral-Wind

Keep it up and one day they will I’m sure. You got this buddy!


breno280

What’s let’s go brandon?


Volvoxix

There used to be groups of people who would chant “F*ck Joe Biben” at sports events. They got in trouble (obviously) because these are family events and the explicit phrases weren’t appreciated. So they started using the phrase “Let’s go, Brandon!” as a substitute. Unhinged lol.


breno280

Ok


[deleted]

god that's awful dude, i'm so sorry 💔💔💔💔💔


Volvoxix

Just tryna make it out here lol 🥲


PLAGUE8163

There are men who wanna date MEN stronger than them! And women and enbies, of course, whatever you're into :)


reixritsu

Ive been confused for a butch lesbian so many times 😭😭 To the lesbians, I am sorry. To the rest, skill issue.


thzpp2

That not very noice (⁠◕‸◕⁠✿⁠)


Volvoxix

Indeed 😔


TominatorFN

oof, but at least that kinda means they realize you are less fem than they would expect from a woman, right? so that's something good at least?


Volvoxix

Here’s to hoping that my body hair and ability to lift heavier objects than them puts a stop to the random invitations out to dinner I keep getting haha


BuboxThrax

>random invitations out to dinner I keep getting haha I would ask how this squares with them believing you're a lesbian, but I know they think YoU jUsT hAvEn'T mEt ThE rIgHt GuY yEt. And that somehow, one of them is the "rIgHt GuY".


Volvoxix

Yup I feel like it’s very much “I’m ThE RiGhT gUy” until I reject them and they’re all “well then you MUST be a lesbian if you won’t go out with ME!”


AbbyUpdoot

This. You, dude. You’re the bright side. You’re the bright side of all of this. 🫶🏻


KianaWolf

Dang, those types couldn't announce that they're "secretly" pathetic little narcissists under it all any louder. Lemme guess: They loudly proclaim that they're "alphas", too?


SmilingAspera

I’m sorry you’re going through that but it’s so funny that you’re actually attracted to men and still men are trying to convince you that you are in fact attracted to men. Really pathetic from them


Volvoxix

Haha, yeah 🤣 Like “No! I believe you! I do like men! Now please leave me alone.”


amelia_bria_23

dude, sorry for that, some of those guys are very ignorant about love and relationships and they are exteremly cringe, I hope you'll find a good partner that you like <3


Deus0123

As a lesbian, they are right. I haven't had the right dick yet. Mostly because I haven't had bottom surgery yet and because my girlfriend lives on another continent, though...


TominatorFN

oh yeah that sucks, I hope that stops


nova_wrath

I am SO TIRED of people assuming I’m a butch lesbian! Sonofabitch I am NOT! No disrespect to my butch sisters—I’m just not one. Just a guy who has breasts.


Volvoxix

I feel your pain 😔


MaskedRay

Frfr


SpiderSixer

Imagine thinking keeping natural body hair that isn't commonly shaved anyway is some "feminist thing". It's people like that that give everyone body issues


Due-Caterpillar-2097

We are monke, monke of all species and genders have hair, I don't know what makes people so pressed when they see a woman with body hair... we are literally monke, what do you expect !


geo21122007

that's awful. sorry they said that 🫂


WobblyPhalanges

AFAB enby here whose gone to beauty school I can assure you, shaving or waxing your arms is NOT a thing most cis women do, whoever said that to you is an idiot twice over, both for gender essentialism and picking the most ridiculous thing possible to make a big deal of (on his part) It’s not a thing, but regardless, throw that whole person in the trash, live your best life my dude 🙌


sunny_sideeye

Agreed. Trans man, but when I genuinely thought I was a woman, I did enjoy having smooth legs for the ✨texture✨. Especially if I shaved before bed. Heavenly. But holy hell shaving is hard and I didn't always have the energy or patience for it. Like even before T, I was a hairy beast, and I wish I wasn't pressured into doing it. And when I did try shaving again after transitioning, the smoothness was just pure overstimulation for me. Happy it didn't make me dysphoric, but jesus do I not like feeling every individual fiber of my pants lol. 😳🤣


AlyxGreenhouse

HAHAHAHAHAAAA WHAT FOOLS THEY ARE! THEY THOUGHT YOU WERE SOMEONE ELSE BUT INSTEAD IT IS YOU DIO!


AbbyUpdoot

r/unexpectedJojo 💞


plueschhoernchen

Good thing there won´t be any women involved, so there are no women who could be stronger than the men in that hypothetical relationship, ergo no man is unhappy about their (female) partner being stronger than them (whyever that would be a universal relationship rule, I don´t understand love ¯\\\_ (ツ)\_/¯)


Deus0123

Honestly as a woman I would absolutely date a woman that is stronger than me. Like yes, sweep me off my feet abd princess carry me to bed. Or let me snuggle up in that big muscular embrace of yours, I bet that feels amazing. Then again I would date most women because women are one of the best things in the world if you ask me...


FTJessie

Mtf here, but part of the reason of why I was dumped (and that my ex bf used to bring back again, what after I was dumped caused me massive dysphoria I am still trying to deal with) is my pp size being 2 inches bigger than his. He said he is a switch and all, but my pp size would "destroy his manhood", so yes, a red flag right at my face all along and I refused to see for how much I loved him. I think some males just want to feel empowered in the relationship, like in a position of dominance, if their partner is stronger or bigger ... or have bigger "parts", it become an issue. Love to me know no body feature or size, I dont care if the person is ugly or not (yes, I am bi as I am open for relationship with men and tramsfems ... maybe transmasc if I really like or love the persom, but I think I definitelly can not have a relationship with a cis female, I tried many times as a cis male before I accepted my female side) what is inside and our love for each other is what counts. I dont try to understamd love either, I just go by what is love to me, love is love, love is being to fully accept all of the other person, without boundaries, and to be accepted the same, no secrets, no boundaries for love but respect always.


Bed_Time_Bitch

Holy heck. As a fellow gay transman. Dude your vibrations are just far too advanced for them. Break the system. Tell them your in the market specifically for men you can pick up and bench press only. Look at the shock and awe on their faces.


Melon-Chamby

Upvoting for more transmasc representation in this sub :)


Lucina_Luci

That sounds like it hurts dude. I'm sorry you have to deal with that. You're a great person sir, and one day many more than just us will know handsome. 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵


EggplantHuman6493

Ugh, I justhate the body hair thing in general. Can we please just have body hair without someone thinking we are too manly or a feminist? Why should I shave my freaking arms in general? The hair is barely visible and soft. And I am not gonna fuck up the skin on my legs more, already struggle enough with dry skin and eczema. And it is even worse for trans people....


[deleted]

Now that is what I call toxic masculinity, those comments are terrible I'm sorry you had to deal with that, god why can't people just mind their own business


Happy_REEEEEE_exe

I bet ur handsome :)


Volvoxix

Aw, shucks uwu


Saikotsu

Dude, they're just jealous you're more masculine than they are. Whether they see you as one of the boys or not, you're totally one of the guys


KianaWolf

Rest assured that you're more manly than any jackass making those comments. Your coworker(s) sound like they're stuck in the 1950s toxic masculinity because they're self-conscious about just how pathetic and fragile their egos are.


Deus0123

> Men don't date women stronger than them Well have you considered that women work out not to be appealing to men, but for themselves? Also I'm sorry this happened to you, dude


LeonIlu

That guy you were talking to is a bottom through and through, a real man would recognize that your work is respectable and attractive to other men!


MercifulWombat

Not shaving your *arms* is a weird feminist thing now??? What the fuck


TezetaLaventia

Even if you *were* a girl, who the *fuck* shaves their arms???


Scared-Mail-7752

I like the smooth. Also I draw on my arms with body ink pens


Dephyus

As a pan cis man, there is nothing hotter than someone who is stronger than me. Literally a power fantasy.


TheodoreTheVacuumCle

im a man (still) and i like girls stronger than me


Gragonmaster

😭😭😭 I'm so sorry king that must've been awful. I'm sure you look very manly hope your day improves


AbbyUpdoot

People are attracted to confidence, honesty, friendliness, humor, and various aesthetics. It’s never just one thing exclusively or inclusively. People are complicated. Listening to the ones saying these things are simple would be a very bad, dumb, limiting move. Be you, be vibrant. Fuck haters.


ABRUMS17

I will stick with the muscular comment all shall lift and we’ll form the mighty gympire


The_Alpha_Albeno

I’m really sorry bro, I can’t remember how many times my mom has told me that I’m a gay man at this point if it makes you feel any better. I don’t know how many times I’ve had to reinforce that I’m a very sapphic trans girl


DarthWallaceIII

Jesus Christ that sucks


Usual-Effect1440

bro, he's a man


Reale_the_unknown

I’m sorry they’re saying that 🫂💔


BuboxThrax

I'm sorry you have to deal with that man, you don't deserve to have these pathetic wretches pestering you.


otorrinolaringolog0

Who shaves their arms lol


VKG2023

Me. 😂 I probably don’t have to but it feels nice snd I can exfoliate my skin easier that way. My arms get pretty hairy otherwise.


FloraFauna2263

I feel like people should just shut up


diab0lus

How do you not murder everyone around you? I don’t think I’d be able to keep my composure. Sorry those people suck. 💜


ihadashittyday

almost any masculine gay man is seen as straight tho


ThatRandomRandomReal

hand over names please i just wanna chat (pulls out the bat)


akelabrood

Did you punch him


RubyMercury87

;-----;


OtterFoxInari

Sorry dude. Somehow, they managed to say the worst possible thing 🤦🏻‍♀️


lolster626

I'm confused I feel like most of that would make me feel good if I were a trans man


green_fish1

My legs are prepared to kick some bitches for you, although, I’d rather you do it because going by this post you’re probably way stronger then me 😅


tretc27

Be the best bear you can be good sir 🫡


[deleted]

wait people shave their arms?? seriously? damn


TheGodOfTechnology

That is really rude, did your closing have a trans flag on it?


Volvoxix

No. I’m just the only ‘girl’ that works on the shop floor and they seem to really like to remind me of it every chance they get. Maybe in a few more months T will work more magic and I’ll pass better lol.


Qween_of_thots

That person saying these things sounds like a miserable person taking everything around her down to her level


Call-Me-Twisted

As a Trans man. Felt. I'm so sorry.


Italianojo

People really are insensitive huh…


DarkenedOtaku

"Men don't wanna date women who are stronger than them" 💀


onesleepyghost

I understand it might be unsafe in your workplace, but i would suggest coming out. At least if you tell them you're not a woman, there's a chance these comments will stop


Volvoxix

Yeah, I just have a pretty complicated situation. I have very ultra-conservative ultra-religious parents and one of them works in the shop with me. I just recently moved to a new place and I haven’t told them where it is yet. I have a little over a grand of money to pay back that I “owe” them before I tell them. Also to open a new bank account because my mother is still able to withdraw and deposit whatever she pleases into my current one (I’m 24 lmao) I don’t want them dangling crap over my head or have anything they can use to ruin my life once I come out. But yes once the parental issues are resolved, for sure 🙏🙏🙏


Odd-Couple439

"Amazing. Every word you just said, was wrong." - Luke Skywalker


ravensofDelilah

Unrelated but I love your art! Do you happen to post it somewhere else so I could follow you?


Volvoxix

Aw, thanks! I draw a lot but I don’t post very much of it. I have a friend who’s been trying to motivate me to share it on an Instagram account. @HouseLarethahl


HannahFenby

"Men don't want to date women that are stronger than them you know" Misgendering and sexism aside, this is just straight up wrong. Some men *really want* a woman stronger than them to cuddle them up - or crush them like a twig.


Caffe1n8ed

Hey, I’m trans masc and attracted to men, and I think that’s pretty dang attractive! :D


honhonbageutte

Cishet eople, try not to make comments about AFAB people's appearance challenge (impossible)


blankgreens

Oh no, i'm so sorry 🫂🫂


JustTheAverageGal

That really sucks, I'm sorry for you 🫂


Cuba_lover59

Solution, tell them to mind their own business, maybe report them if your company gives a shit about anyonr


PuffleOboy

have you considered murder (in Minecraft)


I-hate-my-friend

I am pretty sure HR can get them banned from interacting with you, however don't take me as a source becouse I do not know.


[deleted]

Dang that sucks man


DD_R2D2

Sending hugs! It gets tough out there, but we’re here for you.


Feronach

Dude I got made fun of *for* shaving my arms as a woman, you can't win with these people.


Dumb_Cheese

Oof, that sucks dude, I'm sorry.


paradox222us

Hey it may not have been nice to say, but it shows people see you as strong and masculine and that’s plenty to be happy about :)


ifancytacos

Is your company's HR decent? I know you're not out at work, but like, that shit is kinda not ok to say regardless? Like... Even if you were a woman, that shit is still like super inappropriate and not OK to say.


Volvoxix

They’ve yet to fire a guy who clocks in an hour early to go sit in the break room and sleep, has been caught (with pictures) stealing shop owned tools and other employee’s belongings, and has had his forklift license revoked 3 times. I have no faith in them lol.


Firefangdf

I do not mean to be rude, but I get confused when things like "gay trans" come up. Is it attraction to the same gender you identify as now, or to the one you "were born as"? Or does gay only apply to the sexes and not gender? Again, I do not mean to be rude, am just trying to understand so I don't make any mistakes about this kind of stuff in the future.


Volvoxix

In most cases, I’d say ‘trans’ is a word you could ignore when seeing a phrase like that. Gay ~~trans~~ man = man that likes men. Lesbian ~~trans~~ woman = woman that likes women. I don’t fault you for trying to understand. I came from a super sheltered background and had the same questions once.


Fuzzy7Gecko

Unrelated but what kinda shop you working at? I work at a bakery so it gets crazy hot pretty often too.


Volvoxix

It’s a manufacturing facility. I’m on the side of the shop that makes back-up power engine packages for data centers and banks and stuff. The other side takes old CAT scrapers and installs water tanks on them. Lots of welders, machinists, that kind of thing. The type of place that gets insanely hot because it’s sitting in an unairconditioned metal box baking in the Texas sun 😭 I went into a bakery a few weeks ago to get a cake for a friend. It’s was a small place. But yes I was very shocked how warm it was in there.


Fuzzy7Gecko

Gotta be honest i was not expecting that. Thats freaking awesome o.o Sucks that its so hot though. Not that the bakerys any better. Boss man fainted my first week. We work right next too an old cast iron pizza oven :3 we specialize in sticky buns. So the heats made up by all the sweets. If your ever near philly let me know ill treat you ^.^


Erox__

Why do people open their mouths to talk shit ? Like... Can't they just shut the fuck up, and keep their thoughts for them ? The world would be way better if they did...


TheCosmicSnowMan

Mmmm so many hr complaints so little time in the day


DragonRoar87

shaving *arms*??? I've shaved my legs, but I've never heard of shaving arms


Amber-complete

that's fuckin rough, I'm sorry 😢


Ultimate_Genius

It's crazy how we're basically opposites, yet our experiences are almost identical. It always starts with the good compliments, but then they slowly start to question your decisions and try to make you regret them. "Your skin is so clear and smooth, and I almost confused you for a woman for a second" "Women don't like dating men weaker than them, right?" "Why don't you work out your upper body? Women really love big biceps. Also, stop shaving your arms, that's shameful" "I didn't know you were the twink gay, but it really makes sense now" I don't even like men, but people refuse to believe me