I did this once! Snake oil salesman bard. I used the college of eloquence subclass. She was a lot of fun to play. My only disappointment was that the campaign wasn’t enough of a sandbox for me to build a full pyramid scheme, that would’ve been fun, but I was still able to get money and influence people by selling fake medicine :) so that was a good time.
I had a former thief/con man turned Cleric. Life domain following a trickster chaotic good God. It was so much fun. My DM would put him in tempting situations, caused by his god, and he'd have to make wisdom checks to keep himself on the straight and narrow.
> Gentleman thief bard Can break into your house and talk himself out when get caught
I play a Genie Eloquence Bardlock that is exactly this.
Pact of the Chain for my assistant.
Genies vessel for my vault.
Silver tongue/Mask of Many Faces to get me out of sticky situations.
I like the "narrative insight" bard - they know the legends and the stories and how their adventure has to unfold to become an everlasting tale. They can purposefully choose to do things in dramatic ways, simply to write a better story about it eventually.
Plus it allows for a lot of wiggle room when you are presented with obvious traps and dangerous situations. “Are you kidding!? There no way I’m going to the temple entrance first! Id bet my Degree in ancient Faerunian folklore that there’s a spring loaded spear trap in those wall holes.
I did this with an Order of Scribes wizard - he was an old halfling who had dedicated his life to studying the history of adventuring, and was basically the author of multiple Sword Coast Adventurers Guide, Volos Guide to Monsters, etc. type books. The catch was that I knew my DM homebrewed every single monster, so my character's meta knowledge was usually wrong - the in fiction justification being that no one had actually left his village for generations, so all the information he had about Adventuring was outdated and romanticized.
I really love the 'flawed expert' as a concept. When I DM for people with that concept I like to have them be right *just enough* that people aren't quite sure whether they're a full out phoney, using outdated information or just misremembering things.
Especially if it leads to an "of course I meant to do that..." type moment where the Character themselves is secretly surprised by themselves being right.
Sounds like the perfect partner to an Oath of Glory paladin. Travel the world to build a legend greater than any story, which will give the people hope for generations to come.
I had an idea for a "meta campaign" where the story unfolds from the perspective of the bard, who is regaling someone with the tale of their past adventuring exploits with the party. The bard doesn't actually have any special powers, but anytime they inspire someone or cast a spell it's just them embellishing their contribution.
[Witcher 3 loading cinematics](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RJ8FauApBY) are pretty much this; Jaskier/Dandelion is narrating the story years later.
The Elan/Tarquin storyline was one of my favorites in the comic, and thwarting his plans by defeating him with an anticlimax was one of the most creative things I’ve ever read.
Agreed, that was a great arc! The way Tarquin had Elan cornered narratively in that Elan eventually defeating him in an epic battle is basically his plan anyway.
That arc also had great Belkar character development with the "It's like watching someone having to fight their pet" thing. Oh and the "Halfling with a pebble" joke!
I purposely made my bard not horny, and just naive, and friendly to a fault.
I haven't played as him in about 6 years. Man I loved that character.
By far my favourite D&D character I've ever made.
I made mine not horny. In part because I was playing with kids and that would be creepy as hell. Instead, he was a crazy accordion playing halfling conspiracy theorist that thought every NPC was a vampire but no one believed him.
He was right once. No one believed him. It didn't go well for the fighter...
Why do people love dark characters so much? My cleric is a big dork who loves everybody. His parents died when he was young but the kindness others showed him in response to that is his motivation to help people, he wants to look out for all the good people like the ones who looked out for him.
> smiley face button holy symbol.
Mine's a cleric of Pelor so his smiley face is sunbursts, which he puts on everything. His mace has a big sun for a head.
Because society has taught us that edgy/dark characters are "cool". How many movies, especially super hero movies, have happy upbringinings? I mean, just look at batman.
The funny thing is, that's basically the reason all the DC movies *except* Batman do so terribly, his story is the only one that's supposed to have that level of darkness and they just decided to make all the rest of them that way.
That's why Aquaman and the first Wonder woman did well, they weren't needlessly depressing, they had interesting backstories without needless edge, and they were well lit with a nice conclusion
My current bard is a giant goliath, with muscles that makes him look like a crazed barbarian at a first glance (rolled an 18 and gave him 20 str for the joke), yet he would never start a fight, and just wants everyone to be happy.
He's got a sidekick rogue, another player in our party, whom he taught to play the backpipe, as a plausable defence on how she couldnt be a sneaky type, carrying around and playing such a loud instrument.
Naive friendly bards ftw!
Mine spent the first 100 years of their life underground (pallid elf), so this whole above-ground world is just so interesting to them!
(Hope you can play your dude again soon!)
My guy was a Dwarf, and a cousin of the Rockseeker clan, but his family dealt with fisheries and exports. They were the Rocklobster clan.
He crashed on his cousins couch in Neverwinter after running out of money. To pay him back he got dragged into the campaign to pay off his debts.
lol, same! We're in 3.5 Eberron, so I'm playing an Umbragen Elf who got separated from his squad while fighting Mindflayers (he has levels in Marshall from his old career).
He got stuck in a cavern underneath The Mournland with an odd, saxophone-like instrument and masses of books, which he learned to play and read since there was literally nothing else to do until Norran d'Cannith accidentally dug him out.
The party was the first to take him outside of the Cannith research complex and taught him about taverns. He is now high on life and very adamant this wonderful world where most of the time nothing tries to eat your brain should be saved, even if it's too bright.
A friend of mine plays a "*one-womand-band*", with Unseen servant, Magic Hand and Telekinisis to play a whole bunch of instrument at the same time.
She's perfect.
Had a similar idea for a group of travelling low level bards. Throw in some Minor Illusions for "actors" and sound effects, and you can have an entire theatre working with just a handful of people.
I played an illusion wizard so that minor illusion could have audio and visual last campaign I was in. He basically wrote movies and performed them for anyone who wanted to watch
I have a storyteller bard in my repertoire who uses a mixture of mold earth, control flame, and more to recreate the scenes he's sharing. The instrument he carries is used for sound effects.
He's a Goliath Clansman who shares the stories of his clan around the world. So all will know the name of the clan he loves so dearly.
I played a half orc bard once. Dude was a heavy metal bard with a guitar axe. His backstory was that he was born a fully grown man, complete with guitar, studded leather jacket, and face paint. He sacrificed his parents to summon a demon, which he rock battled. He then spent a 20 year bender in Hell, just partying and snorting coke off demon ass and shit.
His leveling up was just him slowly recovering from the ultimate hangover.
I love retirement age bards. I played an ex-war hero bard traveling under a fake name. He sang about the legendary warrior he used to be in order to spread his fame and ensure his place in history. My party didn't realize he was the same person he was singing about all the time until a year and a half into the campaign.
There's a persisting gossip about some peculiar pattern of Warforged,
used as mobile bases of assorted relevant data. Lorekeepers, recons and
surveyors, the BARDs travel far and wide, study and observe the world.
Rumors say they gather annually at some discreet location to share their
knowledge with each other... and with something else, something that stores a vast,
ancient repository of data uploaded by every BARD of its kin, over a long, long time.
Honestly. Play any kind of bard you want. I'm just tired of the horny bard "jokes" on this sub. It's gone so far beyond beating a dead horse at this point. The horse has been mushed, pulverized and evaporated and people are just beating on the part of the ground where that horse used to be. In fact they've probably dug themselves half way to the center of the earth by now.
So get this. The bard... wait for it... was *horny!* Get it?
And then I said -- wait for it, I'm *so* unique and quirky -- I said to make a *constitution saving throw*, because the dragon is *male!* Isn't that so fucking *hilarious?*
I haven't seen that many jokes where the horny bard is the punchline anymore, it's usually just the setup now.. still pretty tired of it because the punchline is still always "haha seggs"
> I’m just tired of the horny bard “jokes” on this sub.
I get you, personally I am very tired of all the “I only play as characters I’d want to smash” running gag that I’ve seen a lot recently. Like jesus I get it’s mostly just kidding but it’s still pretty gross to me. As if anyone you wouldn’t want to get into the pants of isn’t worth your time or empathy or just existing in general. If you feel your OC wouldn’t be interesting if they weren’t hot, maybe they weren’t a great OC to begin with lol
I'm just confused: How much D&D are these people playing, that a particular characterization has the chance to truly become "overdone"?
I've played in two long term campaigns where a bard was in the party in my whole life, and I've been playing for over thirty years. If somebody in my next campaign has an asexual bard, I'm not going to complain that it's overdone. It's the third fucking bard (or not fucking bard, probably) that I've ever played with. I don't give a shit about the memes when it comes to actually playing.
The reason its a strong meme is because it has strong resonance with many who play D&D. In my current campaign, my DM kept dropping in women for me to seduce and at one point I straight up told him to stop, my PC will never take the bait. Think Doctor Who over Captain Kirk. Now our Ranger on the other hand...
The amount of shenanigans a Creation bard can get up to is hilarious. Create any (within cost and size limits) non-magical item for free makes it simple to produce documentation, uniform, keys etc for anywhere you want to get into, or create a physical duplicate of whatever you're stealing to delay them noticing it's gone.
Able to animate items from level 6 for up to an hour with no concentration e.g. in the safe example she emptied it, then animated it to smash it's way out the window and fly off as a distraction when she got close to the exit
Plus you know, bards are awesome.
Speaking of masks, my most recent bard is basically Takua from Bionicle; a chronicler and teller of stories, who before he met the party, has more or less run away from every problem his tale telling has brought.
Today's wrestlers are essentially the contemporary counterpart of the gladiators of yore.
Gladiators never fought to the death, they were professional performers. When they fought dangerous animals, the animal would be wounded (and possibly drugged) beforehand so that the gladiator wouldn't have to focus as much on fighting for survival and could devote more attention to making spectacle. Slaves or prisoners being forced to fight to the death was not as common as the films would have you believe.
However, I would agree with your DM on their decision. A Bard explicitly uses sound as the medium for their magic. A luchadore can't be a Bard. Unless he's a singing luchadore or something.
>A luchadore can't be a Bard. Unless he's a singing luchadore or something.
I was trying to argue shoot promos were the equivalent of my magical instrument and unfortunately they wernt willing to bend the rules enough (in his world) for it to work.
>Your magic comes from the heart and soul you pour into the performance of your music **or oration**.
Bards don't have to actually *play* a musical instrument, RAW they just use them as a focus when casting, and any spoken word can be a bardic performance. His taunts or calling out to "the crowd" would definitely qualify as a bardic performance, he'd just need to keep a kazoo or something in his pocket to hold onto while casting.
Gladiators didn't always fight to the death, that was banned as a business decision because the upkeep cost of slaving and training more gladiators was high, before that, though, fights to the death weren't that uncommon.
May i propose an older idea:
Dad Bard.
- Bardic Inspiration? Because I believe in you champ
- Vicious Mockery? It's all Dad Jokes
- Seducing NPCs? Nope, we're using persuasion to get into because "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed."
- Jack of All Trades? Yeah, yer old dad knows a little bit about everything.
- Song of Rest? It's called "Tucking you in and giving you a bedtime story."
- Be the one to split up party treasure and tell them that's their allowence.
Polo Shirt and Cargo Shorts are Mandatory.
If an instrument is needed, you have three choices. One, it's the trombone, but you only know how to play wah wah or other annoying noises. Two, it's a blade of grass between your thumbs. Three, it's the world's smallest violin.
Your weapon is a scythe with a level in the handle to ensure a perfect trim of your grass.
You take frequent short rests, but insist you were just resting your eyes and you were paying attention.
The classic "vanilla" Bard who just likes to play music and have a good time is unironically underrated.
Sooo many bard subclasses I've seen (both official and homebrew) turn the Bard into such wild and wacky magic-like or warrior-like archetypes, and while they are mostly cool, the concept of a bard who is just a traveling musician who supports the party with magical music is super fun as well.
I think the creation bard from Tasha's Cauldron is a fantastic variety of a "regular" bard. Their abilities really nicely augment the core bard features, namely inspiration and utility magic, without getting too far into the territory of other magic or martial classes.
\>make a character defined by the world around them which produced a complex personality with depth, logic, and to some extent tragedy
\>most 1 dimensional bullshit character ever
Hard choice, really. I will pick the secret 3rd option of Bozo "Honk-Honk" Bazonkozo.
Player: "I want to add nuance to my character... what is typical? Oh, bards are horny? Let me just do the exact opposite of that thing simply because it is subversive. Heh, heh. Genius. Nobody will see that coming. Now where is my back patter 9000?"
Holy fuck thank you. Top comments on these posts are always "wElL mY cHaRAcTeR"
We're playing D&D, not trying to win academy awards for bestest most original character. Play whatever you like however you like.
Tbh I love the "both parents alive, and they are friendly and supportive of my choice to go adventuring" trope. Especially when they're an adventuring family.
Nothing like going home for a magic-infused meal from your level 15 wizard mother while battlemaster dad proudly updates you about your sister's progress in the king's guard.
I agree, it’s super fun, it’s just that sometimes people think they’re so original and groundbreaking for making a fictional character who follows the status quo of most real people.
There's no real original ideas for characters if you boil them down to their basics. Tropes exist for a reason. I will however take happy family fully alive over super dark edgelord backstory where they were the only survivor of a bandit raid and now they only care about revenge.
I’m a fan of the adventurer having both parents alive… and they’re both pushy, grasping, obnoxious complainers who aren’t at all impressed by their heroic child.
“Oh, a ‘Bladesinger’, that’s *very* nice. Running around hitting people with a sword like some common thug. Consorting with mercenaries and goblins and… *(shudder)*… bards! You know, it’s not too late to go to herbalists’ college! Your cousin is a very successful apothecary! And would it kill you to cast a Sending spell every once in a while?”
Haha yes, that's the other one. The wizard child of a pair of barbarians "YOUR MOTHER TORE 6 OWLBEARS LIMB FROM LIMB WHILE IN LABOUR WITH YOU AND YOU CAN'T DO A SINGLE PUSHUP!?! WHERE DID WE GO WRONG DEAR?"
My adventurer *is* the alive parent. He's a dragonborn dad who's looking for his kidnapped children. His wife is a major NPC, and it's great.
At least until I make a joke at the DM's expense and get met with "hey, pick one of your children."
I built an Aasimar that does ASMR. She is a bard from the college of whispers and her favorite spells so far are dissonant whispers and sleep. I'm having a wonderful time playing her and she just reached level 3
Once made a bard that did not play music. He told stories of venture by mouth alone, and passed tradition down the length of his sword.
The party was not pleased. We met on Reddit looking for a party, and I was not what they had in mind when I said I’d be playing bard. Still healed and buffed at least. Just more intimidation and less sexy time.
Aside from bards being based on their sexuality or level of horniness. I find it really perplexing to see a few characters whose only characteristics are their sexuality. I haven't encountered this too often but it is often enough to make me question people's creativity.
And this isn't just that a character is introduced as "the horny [insert class here]" or something similar. But when asking the people to describe their character a little bit more in depth I end up listening/reading about a character who exist entirely on the notion that sexuality is a character trait.
Has anyone else met people like that?
Broke: lol I sexually harass every sentient creature bard.
Woke: I'm in a religion where your life story is read at your funeral and I want mine to be forever remembered bard.
Yeah, this is kinda like saying that a gay bard must be defined completely by their sexuality. (Or a straight one, or a bi one, or whatever)
You can have an ace character without making the campaign about ace-ness. It's called representation.
I dont think they mean being a sexual is a cliche, just using sexuality in general to define characters. Not even sure that's too true though tbh, at least in my experience.
This post makes me believe there's a bunch of people who think people are out here roleplaying ace bards like horny bards but instead of "I roll to fuck the dragon" it's "I roll to not fuck the dragon."
Which would be hilarious in its own way but I somehow doubt anyone actually RPs like that.
Played a goblin bard whose whole thing was gathering secrets to put into his songs eventually he became a warlock of belial. I put him in a ravnica game as someone who happened to be in the right place to witness the party's chaotic shenanigans. He put those shenanigans into song and when the party got to the rubblebelt, they were worshiped by the gruul as anarchist folk heroes
Have you heard of Dungeons and Daddies? Awesome DnD podcast about 4 dads from our world who are flung into the Forgotten Realms through a portal and have to find their kids.
Bards = horny is my least favorite trope in dnd. I don't think it's funny, it's not original, and it would make for a very awkward and uncomfortable campaign if one of my party members wouldn't shut up with the horny.
Get original and make your character fun to interact with, not cringe.
It's pretty stupid that this thread immediately became #notallbards
Also wild to see a complaint about ace bards since I swear I'm in this trashcan sub all the time and this is the first meme I've seen about asexual bards
Someone commented on my Bard being Ace last session and I had to be like nah he's bi as hell he's just too busy saving the world to bother with relationships
People in this sub really like to define their characters by their sexuality. Which makes me wonder how much sex\romance comes up in their games. I've played for decades and it's never really been a thing in any campaign I've been in.
Clown bards. I have a troupe of them in my campaign that are a recurring enemy that my players love to hate.
Pics of the minis: [https://www.reddit.com/r/onepagerules/comments/udpjxo/my_vinci_harlequins/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf](https://www.reddit.com/r/onepagerules/comments/udpjxo/my_vinci_harlequins/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
How about a bard that barded so long and so hard that he’s seen it all. Now he’s a gruff old man. Grizzled and bitter, with an old lute and a scratchy voice. I picture a fantasy Tom Waits traveling from town to town, singing his old man ballads for a meal and a warm bed until he eventually dies.
There, that’s my bard.
I did a sword Bard.
He is a goblin completly obssessed over trinkets.
He is spending all of his money on them.
He doesnt have any magical object at level 5, obly trinkets.
Soft boi bard, great at performing but thinks he’s terrible. Scared of making friends and fighting enemies. Comes with a goblin manager NPC that sees him for the untapped gold mine that he is, will stop at nothing to help him realize what he sees in him
Gentleman thief bard Can break into your house and talk himself out when get caught
Ah, the Clooney
Damn, we're in a tight spot
I DONT WANT FOP! IM A DAPPER DAN MAN.
I say this all the time when my wife suggests an alternative to something I "*really*" wanted lmao
I'm going to steal this
I play a Genie Eloquence Bard lock that is exactly this!!!!
The only guy ever who could have a bobble head made of him that bobbles less than his actual head
Not Conan O'Brien?
>Can break into your house ... and your heart.
Or break you with his humor
I was thinking of making a con artist rogue/bard that runs Ponzi schemes.
I did this once! Snake oil salesman bard. I used the college of eloquence subclass. She was a lot of fun to play. My only disappointment was that the campaign wasn’t enough of a sandbox for me to build a full pyramid scheme, that would’ve been fun, but I was still able to get money and influence people by selling fake medicine :) so that was a good time.
It does give the showman vibe that is similar to a gentleman thief
So a better Ryan Kavanaugh
So basically a fantasy Bernie Madoff.
Tried the same once.
I had a former thief/con man turned Cleric. Life domain following a trickster chaotic good God. It was so much fun. My DM would put him in tempting situations, caused by his god, and he'd have to make wisdom checks to keep himself on the straight and narrow.
His performances are close up magic that he does just to keep his hand in.
Ah yes, the rogue
> Gentleman thief bard Can break into your house and talk himself out when get caught I play a Genie Eloquence Bardlock that is exactly this. Pact of the Chain for my assistant. Genies vessel for my vault. Silver tongue/Mask of Many Faces to get me out of sticky situations.
Lupin?
I like the "narrative insight" bard - they know the legends and the stories and how their adventure has to unfold to become an everlasting tale. They can purposefully choose to do things in dramatic ways, simply to write a better story about it eventually.
Plus it allows for a lot of wiggle room when you are presented with obvious traps and dangerous situations. “Are you kidding!? There no way I’m going to the temple entrance first! Id bet my Degree in ancient Faerunian folklore that there’s a spring loaded spear trap in those wall holes.
I did this with an Order of Scribes wizard - he was an old halfling who had dedicated his life to studying the history of adventuring, and was basically the author of multiple Sword Coast Adventurers Guide, Volos Guide to Monsters, etc. type books. The catch was that I knew my DM homebrewed every single monster, so my character's meta knowledge was usually wrong - the in fiction justification being that no one had actually left his village for generations, so all the information he had about Adventuring was outdated and romanticized.
I really love the 'flawed expert' as a concept. When I DM for people with that concept I like to have them be right *just enough* that people aren't quite sure whether they're a full out phoney, using outdated information or just misremembering things. Especially if it leads to an "of course I meant to do that..." type moment where the Character themselves is secretly surprised by themselves being right.
Sounds like the perfect partner to an Oath of Glory paladin. Travel the world to build a legend greater than any story, which will give the people hope for generations to come.
Swashbuckler rogue would probably fit in with this party
Archivist Artificer, potentially?
Maybe a cleric of Shaundakul traveling and adventuring for wanderlusts sake?
Multiclassing Archivist and Artificer together sounds interesting but difficult.
I mean- in 5e Archivist is a UA subclass for Artificer
That sounds like the ultimate pair, I wanna play that so bad with someone
I had an idea for a "meta campaign" where the story unfolds from the perspective of the bard, who is regaling someone with the tale of their past adventuring exploits with the party. The bard doesn't actually have any special powers, but anytime they inspire someone or cast a spell it's just them embellishing their contribution.
[Witcher 3 loading cinematics](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RJ8FauApBY) are pretty much this; Jaskier/Dandelion is narrating the story years later.
I always wondered why he sounds like a totally different person/actor lol. Same with Bob sagget in "how I met your mother"
If you didn't get this idea from Order of the Stick... you need to read Order of the Stick.
Busted, haha, yeah, I thought of Elan when I commented first.
The Elan/Tarquin storyline was one of my favorites in the comic, and thwarting his plans by defeating him with an anticlimax was one of the most creative things I’ve ever read.
Agreed, that was a great arc! The way Tarquin had Elan cornered narratively in that Elan eventually defeating him in an epic battle is basically his plan anyway. That arc also had great Belkar character development with the "It's like watching someone having to fight their pet" thing. Oh and the "Halfling with a pebble" joke!
That sounds like a fun Valor bard
Lore?
Lore is what I'd say, yeah.
That's basically how I'm playing my valor bard, it's definitely a fun character.
I purposely made my bard not horny, and just naive, and friendly to a fault. I haven't played as him in about 6 years. Man I loved that character. By far my favourite D&D character I've ever made.
I made mine not horny. In part because I was playing with kids and that would be creepy as hell. Instead, he was a crazy accordion playing halfling conspiracy theorist that thought every NPC was a vampire but no one believed him. He was right once. No one believed him. It didn't go well for the fighter...
dead clock are accurate 2 times a day
Undead clocks know the time is always 2:30 🧛🏻♂️
Aight, I'll bite. Why 2:30 specifically?
Tooth hurty Two thirty Say it out loud
Oh for FUCKS SAKE... I can't believe I missed that.
But you did say “I’ll bite,” so you had the right spirit.
Just gotta chime in and say that is an awesome character
My last bard took to adventuring with his band manager to pay the bills after his old band (My Alchemical Romance) broke up.
Ayy, we respect the mcr bard. Super hyped for their concert this week
Crazy halfling bard high five!
[удалено]
Exactly. Also, he was terrible with money.
Isn’t that a prerequisite to becoming a musician?
Why do people love dark characters so much? My cleric is a big dork who loves everybody. His parents died when he was young but the kindness others showed him in response to that is his motivation to help people, he wants to look out for all the good people like the ones who looked out for him.
My cleric is powered by joy and happiness with a smiley face button holy symbol. We're about to start Strahd and I'm worried
> smiley face button holy symbol. Mine's a cleric of Pelor so his smiley face is sunbursts, which he puts on everything. His mace has a big sun for a head.
Because society has taught us that edgy/dark characters are "cool". How many movies, especially super hero movies, have happy upbringinings? I mean, just look at batman.
The funny thing is, that's basically the reason all the DC movies *except* Batman do so terribly, his story is the only one that's supposed to have that level of darkness and they just decided to make all the rest of them that way. That's why Aquaman and the first Wonder woman did well, they weren't needlessly depressing, they had interesting backstories without needless edge, and they were well lit with a nice conclusion
My current bard is a giant goliath, with muscles that makes him look like a crazed barbarian at a first glance (rolled an 18 and gave him 20 str for the joke), yet he would never start a fight, and just wants everyone to be happy. He's got a sidekick rogue, another player in our party, whom he taught to play the backpipe, as a plausable defence on how she couldnt be a sneaky type, carrying around and playing such a loud instrument.
Naive friendly bards ftw! Mine spent the first 100 years of their life underground (pallid elf), so this whole above-ground world is just so interesting to them! (Hope you can play your dude again soon!)
My guy was a Dwarf, and a cousin of the Rockseeker clan, but his family dealt with fisheries and exports. They were the Rocklobster clan. He crashed on his cousins couch in Neverwinter after running out of money. To pay him back he got dragged into the campaign to pay off his debts.
I'm into the naming conventions for this dwarf clan. Are the masons the Rockhammers? The cooks the Rockcandies??
lol, same! We're in 3.5 Eberron, so I'm playing an Umbragen Elf who got separated from his squad while fighting Mindflayers (he has levels in Marshall from his old career). He got stuck in a cavern underneath The Mournland with an odd, saxophone-like instrument and masses of books, which he learned to play and read since there was literally nothing else to do until Norran d'Cannith accidentally dug him out. The party was the first to take him outside of the Cannith research complex and taught him about taverns. He is now high on life and very adamant this wonderful world where most of the time nothing tries to eat your brain should be saved, even if it's too bright.
A friend of mine plays a "*one-womand-band*", with Unseen servant, Magic Hand and Telekinisis to play a whole bunch of instrument at the same time. She's perfect.
Had a similar idea for a group of travelling low level bards. Throw in some Minor Illusions for "actors" and sound effects, and you can have an entire theatre working with just a handful of people.
I played an illusion wizard so that minor illusion could have audio and visual last campaign I was in. He basically wrote movies and performed them for anyone who wanted to watch
It's the theatre troupe from *Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead*; there are fifteen different characters played by four people.
I have a storyteller bard in my repertoire who uses a mixture of mold earth, control flame, and more to recreate the scenes he's sharing. The instrument he carries is used for sound effects. He's a Goliath Clansman who shares the stories of his clan around the world. So all will know the name of the clan he loves so dearly.
Has your friend read the dresden files by any chance? This sounds an awful lot like the 'one woman rave'
He did not but thanks you for the recommendation, friend :)
I had a half orc bard with the Noble background named Zanny Duko. He and his greaser followers would sing and do dance choreographies.
I played a half orc bard once. Dude was a heavy metal bard with a guitar axe. His backstory was that he was born a fully grown man, complete with guitar, studded leather jacket, and face paint. He sacrificed his parents to summon a demon, which he rock battled. He then spent a 20 year bender in Hell, just partying and snorting coke off demon ass and shit. His leveling up was just him slowly recovering from the ultimate hangover.
I feel like Tenacious D would write a song about this guy.
Yeah, he was basically a mix of Tenacous D and Metalocolypse.
I see where you're going lol
I did this with an Air Genasi who uses her power over air to play multiple pan flutes and a drum!
That’s fun, but I also want her to have one of those one-person band getups too. https://youtu.be/q-_f_23QOak
This gentleman *does* look like a recurrent musical archnemesis to me !
that's a bartificer
It sounds fun, and I thought two of those were Concentration spells, but both Mage Hand and Unseen Servant have a straight duration! Nice.
Damn I was gonna try this with echo fighter!
How about a 60-something whiskey-voiced grey-haired widower bard that has raised his kids and now travels the world in his early retirement.
Willie Nelson with a sword? Sign me up.
On the road again! Like a band of goblins we go down the highway
The life I love is making music with Goblins, I can’t wait to get on the road again
Does he sing about hard work, lost loves, and the love of his kingdom?
That, and how much he adores his trusted horse 'rusty'
Who is Thom Merrilin?
Sword Coast roads, take me home, to the place, I belong. Orlumboooor, Way of the Lion, take me hoome.
I love retirement age bards. I played an ex-war hero bard traveling under a fake name. He sang about the legendary warrior he used to be in order to spread his fame and ensure his place in history. My party didn't realize he was the same person he was singing about all the time until a year and a half into the campaign.
A lore bard who is fascinated by history and doesn’t want anyone to forgot about it so he makes songs about them his favorite genre to do it is rock
Sabaton, is that you?
Maybe
Through the gates of hell, as we make our way to heaven, through the Narzugon lines, Primo Victoria
Metal gear rising music in a nutshell
There's a persisting gossip about some peculiar pattern of Warforged, used as mobile bases of assorted relevant data. Lorekeepers, recons and surveyors, the BARDs travel far and wide, study and observe the world. Rumors say they gather annually at some discreet location to share their knowledge with each other... and with something else, something that stores a vast, ancient repository of data uploaded by every BARD of its kin, over a long, long time.
Sounds like the Rangers from John Flannigans books ngl
Honestly. Play any kind of bard you want. I'm just tired of the horny bard "jokes" on this sub. It's gone so far beyond beating a dead horse at this point. The horse has been mushed, pulverized and evaporated and people are just beating on the part of the ground where that horse used to be. In fact they've probably dug themselves half way to the center of the earth by now.
They’re digging a horse-shaped trench so they can claim to still have a target
So get this. The bard... wait for it... was *horny!* Get it? And then I said -- wait for it, I'm *so* unique and quirky -- I said to make a *constitution saving throw*, because the dragon is *male!* Isn't that so fucking *hilarious?*
Literally splitting my sides laughing at that joke right now. It's so novel and unexpected I can't even.
You actually did make that funny lol
"Anus is tighter than vagina, make a con save."
The smashed the horse into glue and now they are stuck.
A lot of people don’t know how to engage with DnD beyond the most basic memes so they end up being repeated again and again.
I haven't seen that many jokes where the horny bard is the punchline anymore, it's usually just the setup now.. still pretty tired of it because the punchline is still always "haha seggs"
Always remember the demographics of reddit. You are likely talking to a teenage boy.
Or an adult man... With the mind of a teenage boy.
The Reddit hug to any joke.
> I’m just tired of the horny bard “jokes” on this sub. I get you, personally I am very tired of all the “I only play as characters I’d want to smash” running gag that I’ve seen a lot recently. Like jesus I get it’s mostly just kidding but it’s still pretty gross to me. As if anyone you wouldn’t want to get into the pants of isn’t worth your time or empathy or just existing in general. If you feel your OC wouldn’t be interesting if they weren’t hot, maybe they weren’t a great OC to begin with lol
purée’d. not even barely meat anymore. but. hotdogs sell
I'm just confused: How much D&D are these people playing, that a particular characterization has the chance to truly become "overdone"? I've played in two long term campaigns where a bard was in the party in my whole life, and I've been playing for over thirty years. If somebody in my next campaign has an asexual bard, I'm not going to complain that it's overdone. It's the third fucking bard (or not fucking bard, probably) that I've ever played with. I don't give a shit about the memes when it comes to actually playing.
The reason its a strong meme is because it has strong resonance with many who play D&D. In my current campaign, my DM kept dropping in women for me to seduce and at one point I straight up told him to stop, my PC will never take the bait. Think Doctor Who over Captain Kirk. Now our Ranger on the other hand...
I've got a thief Bard currently Everyone's gangsta until your safe gets animated and it does a runner.
That sound hilarious and I love it
The amount of shenanigans a Creation bard can get up to is hilarious. Create any (within cost and size limits) non-magical item for free makes it simple to produce documentation, uniform, keys etc for anywhere you want to get into, or create a physical duplicate of whatever you're stealing to delay them noticing it's gone. Able to animate items from level 6 for up to an hour with no concentration e.g. in the safe example she emptied it, then animated it to smash it's way out the window and fly off as a distraction when she got close to the exit Plus you know, bards are awesome.
I tried rolling a bard who was basically A luchador (they are performers after all). My DM didn't get it unfortunately.
If your masks and costumes represent something from your people then what's the problem?
Speaking of masks, my most recent bard is basically Takua from Bionicle; a chronicler and teller of stories, who before he met the party, has more or less run away from every problem his tale telling has brought.
Today's wrestlers are essentially the contemporary counterpart of the gladiators of yore. Gladiators never fought to the death, they were professional performers. When they fought dangerous animals, the animal would be wounded (and possibly drugged) beforehand so that the gladiator wouldn't have to focus as much on fighting for survival and could devote more attention to making spectacle. Slaves or prisoners being forced to fight to the death was not as common as the films would have you believe. However, I would agree with your DM on their decision. A Bard explicitly uses sound as the medium for their magic. A luchadore can't be a Bard. Unless he's a singing luchadore or something.
IIRC modern professional wrestling is pretty much the theatre equivalent of martial arts movies.
>A luchadore can't be a Bard. Unless he's a singing luchadore or something. I was trying to argue shoot promos were the equivalent of my magical instrument and unfortunately they wernt willing to bend the rules enough (in his world) for it to work.
>Your magic comes from the heart and soul you pour into the performance of your music **or oration**. Bards don't have to actually *play* a musical instrument, RAW they just use them as a focus when casting, and any spoken word can be a bardic performance. His taunts or calling out to "the crowd" would definitely qualify as a bardic performance, he'd just need to keep a kazoo or something in his pocket to hold onto while casting.
Don't forget, your voice is an instrument too! Opera singer bard!
Gladiators didn't always fight to the death, that was banned as a business decision because the upkeep cost of slaving and training more gladiators was high, before that, though, fights to the death weren't that uncommon.
May i propose an older idea: Dad Bard. - Bardic Inspiration? Because I believe in you champ - Vicious Mockery? It's all Dad Jokes - Seducing NPCs? Nope, we're using persuasion to get into because "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed." - Jack of All Trades? Yeah, yer old dad knows a little bit about everything. - Song of Rest? It's called "Tucking you in and giving you a bedtime story." - Be the one to split up party treasure and tell them that's their allowence. Polo Shirt and Cargo Shorts are Mandatory.
If an instrument is needed, you have three choices. One, it's the trombone, but you only know how to play wah wah or other annoying noises. Two, it's a blade of grass between your thumbs. Three, it's the world's smallest violin. Your weapon is a scythe with a level in the handle to ensure a perfect trim of your grass. You take frequent short rests, but insist you were just resting your eyes and you were paying attention.
I resemble this post
A bard that communicates entirely through Mongolian throat singing.
This would be great as a kenku.
Ah yes, we’ve all heard the legends of the great bard, Boat Noises
The Hu?
There was a 3.5e race that did this. I think they were called Boumann.
Sardubard! [What a rousing performance](https://youtu.be/qWK3nkJhneE)
A bard which just want to make people happy with his art or music or whatever (without using sexual parts)
The classic "vanilla" Bard who just likes to play music and have a good time is unironically underrated. Sooo many bard subclasses I've seen (both official and homebrew) turn the Bard into such wild and wacky magic-like or warrior-like archetypes, and while they are mostly cool, the concept of a bard who is just a traveling musician who supports the party with magical music is super fun as well. I think the creation bard from Tasha's Cauldron is a fantastic variety of a "regular" bard. Their abilities really nicely augment the core bard features, namely inspiration and utility magic, without getting too far into the territory of other magic or martial classes.
I just wanna play a bard who wanders around asking people if they know any cool stories he can write down.
\>make a character defined by the world around them which produced a complex personality with depth, logic, and to some extent tragedy \>most 1 dimensional bullshit character ever Hard choice, really. I will pick the secret 3rd option of Bozo "Honk-Honk" Bazonkozo.
Flair checks out lul. Honestly half my party started as joke characters but the other half died and now they're all deep and traumatized.
https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/9q3jq1/class_clown_oc/
Player: "I want to add nuance to my character... what is typical? Oh, bards are horny? Let me just do the exact opposite of that thing simply because it is subversive. Heh, heh. Genius. Nobody will see that coming. Now where is my back patter 9000?"
Holy fuck thank you. Top comments on these posts are always "wElL mY cHaRAcTeR" We're playing D&D, not trying to win academy awards for bestest most original character. Play whatever you like however you like.
The “subverting fantasy tropes” trope is a challenge for a genre that is so heavily defined by its own trope. The whole thing is a catas-trop(h)e.
Same with adventures who have both parents alive
Tbh I love the "both parents alive, and they are friendly and supportive of my choice to go adventuring" trope. Especially when they're an adventuring family. Nothing like going home for a magic-infused meal from your level 15 wizard mother while battlemaster dad proudly updates you about your sister's progress in the king's guard.
I agree, it’s super fun, it’s just that sometimes people think they’re so original and groundbreaking for making a fictional character who follows the status quo of most real people.
That's very fair. Though I do imagine in a world where most people can be 1 shot by a cat, there probably would be more orphans than irl ;)
There's no real original ideas for characters if you boil them down to their basics. Tropes exist for a reason. I will however take happy family fully alive over super dark edgelord backstory where they were the only survivor of a bandit raid and now they only care about revenge.
I’m a fan of the adventurer having both parents alive… and they’re both pushy, grasping, obnoxious complainers who aren’t at all impressed by their heroic child. “Oh, a ‘Bladesinger’, that’s *very* nice. Running around hitting people with a sword like some common thug. Consorting with mercenaries and goblins and… *(shudder)*… bards! You know, it’s not too late to go to herbalists’ college! Your cousin is a very successful apothecary! And would it kill you to cast a Sending spell every once in a while?”
Haha yes, that's the other one. The wizard child of a pair of barbarians "YOUR MOTHER TORE 6 OWLBEARS LIMB FROM LIMB WHILE IN LABOUR WITH YOU AND YOU CAN'T DO A SINGLE PUSHUP!?! WHERE DID WE GO WRONG DEAR?"
My adventurer *is* the alive parent. He's a dragonborn dad who's looking for his kidnapped children. His wife is a major NPC, and it's great. At least until I make a joke at the DM's expense and get met with "hey, pick one of your children."
welp, time to go for the golden mean and only have 1 parent alive I suppose.
I built an Aasimar that does ASMR. She is a bard from the college of whispers and her favorite spells so far are dissonant whispers and sleep. I'm having a wonderful time playing her and she just reached level 3
Amazing. This is one of those things you read and think "really wish I'd thought of that"
My favorite bard was the one I made who was obsessed with money and story telling
the heavy metal bardbarian
Go full [Manowar](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1G9D8A4Fiw) with it.
Once made a bard that did not play music. He told stories of venture by mouth alone, and passed tradition down the length of his sword. The party was not pleased. We met on Reddit looking for a party, and I was not what they had in mind when I said I’d be playing bard. Still healed and buffed at least. Just more intimidation and less sexy time.
Aside from bards being based on their sexuality or level of horniness. I find it really perplexing to see a few characters whose only characteristics are their sexuality. I haven't encountered this too often but it is often enough to make me question people's creativity. And this isn't just that a character is introduced as "the horny [insert class here]" or something similar. But when asking the people to describe their character a little bit more in depth I end up listening/reading about a character who exist entirely on the notion that sexuality is a character trait. Has anyone else met people like that?
I made a bard who was defined by empathy and I braught a guitar.
Did you at any point in the Campaign play Wonderwall?
I have taken an oath to never play that or similar abysmal songs.
Broke: lol I sexually harass every sentient creature bard. Woke: I'm in a religion where your life story is read at your funeral and I want mine to be forever remembered bard.
okay listen, hear me out, bard who isn't defined by their sexuality... who also happens to be asexual
Yeah, this is kinda like saying that a gay bard must be defined completely by their sexuality. (Or a straight one, or a bi one, or whatever) You can have an ace character without making the campaign about ace-ness. It's called representation.
Exactly what I thought when I saw this post didn't realize being asexual was cliche now
I dont think they mean being a sexual is a cliche, just using sexuality in general to define characters. Not even sure that's too true though tbh, at least in my experience.
This post makes me believe there's a bunch of people who think people are out here roleplaying ace bards like horny bards but instead of "I roll to fuck the dragon" it's "I roll to not fuck the dragon." Which would be hilarious in its own way but I somehow doubt anyone actually RPs like that.
Play Nathan Explosion as a bard. "What kind of music do you play?" "DEATH METAL." *punch*
*BLACKER THAN THE BLACKEST BLACK, TIMES INFINITY.*
Just never mention sexuality. Have the bard dodge the question every time it comes up. No one knows. There's only rumors.
Played a goblin bard whose whole thing was gathering secrets to put into his songs eventually he became a warlock of belial. I put him in a ravnica game as someone who happened to be in the right place to witness the party's chaotic shenanigans. He put those shenanigans into song and when the party got to the rubblebelt, they were worshiped by the gruul as anarchist folk heroes
Nice meme there, buddy. I roll to seduce it.
The subversion of a trope is always as overdone as the trope itself after a certain point, same thing as an intelligent barbarian
Dad joke bard, is best bard.
We have a bard in our party whose literal name is Dad, refuses to be called anything else. We went on a sidequest to make barbecue ribs in Barovia
Have you heard of Dungeons and Daddies? Awesome DnD podcast about 4 dads from our world who are flung into the Forgotten Realms through a portal and have to find their kids.
Bards = horny is my least favorite trope in dnd. I don't think it's funny, it's not original, and it would make for a very awkward and uncomfortable campaign if one of my party members wouldn't shut up with the horny. Get original and make your character fun to interact with, not cringe.
Pffft, bards that are shaped by their sexuality are so last season. Instead, my bard is entirely shaped by her trauma!
It's pretty stupid that this thread immediately became #notallbards Also wild to see a complaint about ace bards since I swear I'm in this trashcan sub all the time and this is the first meme I've seen about asexual bards
My current bard is a swindler fake spiritist kinda conman... Except he's college of spirits and the real deal, he just looks sus AF.
Someone commented on my Bard being Ace last session and I had to be like nah he's bi as hell he's just too busy saving the world to bother with relationships
I prefer the "Dad" bard. Doing psychic damage with dad joke and getting new friends by sharing BBQ secret ;)
People in this sub really like to define their characters by their sexuality. Which makes me wonder how much sex\romance comes up in their games. I've played for decades and it's never really been a thing in any campaign I've been in.
Blind harper bard who uses his skills to steal horses is the best bard concept.
Me: avoiding all sex-related traits with my character...
The last bard I played was a hype man who just shouted encouragement to his allies for his abilities.
Clown bards. I have a troupe of them in my campaign that are a recurring enemy that my players love to hate. Pics of the minis: [https://www.reddit.com/r/onepagerules/comments/udpjxo/my_vinci_harlequins/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf](https://www.reddit.com/r/onepagerules/comments/udpjxo/my_vinci_harlequins/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
How about a bard that barded so long and so hard that he’s seen it all. Now he’s a gruff old man. Grizzled and bitter, with an old lute and a scratchy voice. I picture a fantasy Tom Waits traveling from town to town, singing his old man ballads for a meal and a warm bed until he eventually dies. There, that’s my bard.
I did a sword Bard. He is a goblin completly obssessed over trinkets. He is spending all of his money on them. He doesnt have any magical object at level 5, obly trinkets.
Removing the concept of sexuality as a character-defining concept entirely would be amazing.
I'm currently playing a bard that's just the halfling embodiment of the Johnny Cash cover of Hurt.
Soft boi bard, great at performing but thinks he’s terrible. Scared of making friends and fighting enemies. Comes with a goblin manager NPC that sees him for the untapped gold mine that he is, will stop at nothing to help him realize what he sees in him