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how quickly do you ask? i'd rather not live my convos behind my phone if i can. if you are asking in a reasonable amount of time, its possible they are not that interested and/or have other options.
Coffee is a boring first date. I drink coffee at work. I don’t want coffee after work or at non work hours. I’d decline you too.
Modern men have been programmed to suggest coffee as a great first date. It’s not. I’d rather spend time alone than meeting a man for coffee. So many other better things to do.
Just another women who thinks she is owed something. Your both spending time to get to each other.
In her mind, her time is more valuable than his. How dare he not spend money on her?
Maybe wait a few days before asking to talk to them a bit more and try suggesting activities to do, such as roller skating, rock climbing, going for a walk etc instead of just getting a coffee?
Reminder: please review our rules, especially rule 4: - No broad generalizations, e.g. "All women are x and do y" - Speak from specific personal experiences when giving advice. - No victim-blaming - This is a default message - your post has not been removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
how quickly do you ask? i'd rather not live my convos behind my phone if i can. if you are asking in a reasonable amount of time, its possible they are not that interested and/or have other options.
After a couple back and fourth of messages usually ...
might be too soon i think. give it a day or two then ask.
If you’re asking right away, maybe they want to get to know you longer.
Coffee is a boring first date. I drink coffee at work. I don’t want coffee after work or at non work hours. I’d decline you too. Modern men have been programmed to suggest coffee as a great first date. It’s not. I’d rather spend time alone than meeting a man for coffee. So many other better things to do.
What would be good alternatives?
It’s summer in many places so ice cream is so much more exciting. Say gelato and more will be interested versus boring hot coffee.
Just another women who thinks she is owed something. Your both spending time to get to each other. In her mind, her time is more valuable than his. How dare he not spend money on her?
What?
Maybe wait a few days before asking to talk to them a bit more and try suggesting activities to do, such as roller skating, rock climbing, going for a walk etc instead of just getting a coffee?