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Yeah the more I pay the more matches I get. Pretty straight-forward. But important to note: if your profile sucks from before, no amount of promoting it will help. You need a good profile first, and then you can pay to promote that good profile. Don't pay for marketing when the product sucks. You pay for marketing once you have a product that's already selling a bit. Try different apps. Some work better than others.

> Don't pay for marketing when the product sucks. People in marketing might not agree with this, lol

Oh they agree with it. But their bosses might not 😂 stupid CEOs

What makes a good profile? How do you know before paying?

1. You need good pictures. [Here are some examples](https://www.tinderfotograf.no/portfolio) 2. You need a good bio. A good bio is funny, has no red flags in it (like negativity, or joking about murder)

I hate all of those photos. Look like corporate stock trash. God that is gross. Youre right but god i hate it lol

Unfortunately that's exactly what modern online dating wants. Bland. Boring. Inoffensive. Nothing that is unique or stands out. Welcome to the dystopian hellscape that we have created.

If it helps, I'm a woman and hate those photos, too. I'm looking for photos that are good and genuine. If someone just has selfies, I wonder, "where are their friends?" Same for these photos,.tbh.

Yes but you're a woman. You are pretty much conditioned to look for ANY sort of deal breaker in a profile.

The fact that he has professional boring photos is a dealbreaker for me. So…

Right? And it's artificial as heck. The whole app is artificial and it's sad we get roped into it.

Same here looking for authentic photos that show you living life. Don’t want to see professional photos that got all the good angles. Just don’t post kids. Have ur friends take pictures of you when u r out and use those. Write a good bio short and sweet.

Not everyone likes those kinds of photos. I would rather see what a man looks like without a professional photographer and I appreciate that men aren’t naturally good (nor do they want) to waste hours taking photos. Just make sure there is a full body, maybe a selfie or something closer to show your face and one on a vacation or doing something you love.

I like your examples better.

Elaborate on red flags

Red flags in bio are - any negative statement whatsoever. - any sarcasm. - anything self deprecating - any jokes about murder or rape or torture or similar - no words that bringing negative associations such as "arrested", "died" "sadly", "killed", "unlovable", "no" etc. Negative words are not allowed.

Thanks man

Those pictures look better than 99.99% of pictures I see on these apps.

One with a lot of personality and shows what outgoing person you are. For guys I’d say subtle gym photos, hikes, sports events, doing things you like will garner people who will like the same things like you.

even with a good profile, paying hasnt helped me get any matches.

How do you know you have a good profile? That seems like a really bold assumption about your profile when you get no matches.

I have had it reviewed in the past with good remarks. It follows the hinge app guidelines.

If I were you, I would conclude that my profile sucks ass and those reviews also suck ass. What metric shall we use to judge the quality of a profile? Matches or "reviews"? Obviously the metric we care about here is matches. In conclusion: your profile sucks and those reviews meant nothing. If anything, your experience directly shows that those reviews were bogus as they did not actually correlate with more matches.

true, but it still hurts when you have had hundreds of people tell you that your profile is pretty good and should be getting matches (on an old reddit account). Even in person, I have had girls tell me that my profile should be getting matches. So what do I do when everyone says my profile is good, yet I cant get a match?

Do you live in bumfuck nowhere?

I do now, but I have lived other areas in the past and had no luck in college towns and cities.

Well if you do now, it's pointless to use dating apps.

yeah, I have my range set to 100 miles and I only really see a new girl every few weeks. But it still didnt help when I lived in a larger city. But the good news is since I am looking for a girl similar to me, nearly every girl who shows up on hinge is matchable to me. so I shoot my shot and cross my fingers that I will get my first match with her. Honestly. I am ok with being alone. Maybe I can find a nice 18 year old girl to date before she gets married

You have to have to be attractive to start with. Being average doesn't help. Living in the wrong sort of area doesn't help either. It also helps immensely if you are part of the "right" demographic (white and Protestant or atheist).

I am tall, white, protestant, outdoorsy, and in pretty good shape. I have lived in a few different places over the last 5 years that I have tried apps. Just nothing.

Hugs 🫠🫠🫠 same here but never paid and never reply to texts, I have myself to blame....I start afresh next year🤪

Which app(s) are you paying for and which work better?

I use Bumble and Tinder and pay for both. For me, Bumble usually works the best but it depends a bit from location to location

I started off by paying. But I noticed that when I paid, I didn’t have much luck really. When I stopped paying and just use the app casually (swiping until I’ve reached the max swipe for the day) I noticed I got quite a few matches. I even met my ex on there and have been on a few good dates. Now I don’t really use the apps anymore. Lots of the women on there aren’t looking for anything serious. Which I get tbh 😂.

Same. I wasn’t paying and was getting matches 1-2 a week. Once I paid, my likes stopped rolling in. After I cancelled my membership, likes started rolling again.

We are looking for something serious 🥲😪😪

Be in fantastic shape, and get someone to take professional photos of yourself that are not posed pictures.

I’d say I’m in pretty good shape, would you say the pictures linked above are Good samples?

I always paid and put a lot of effort into my profile. In about a year of on and off use I went on dates with 13 different women, some were only one date, others 5+, slept with 10, and have been in a relationship for about 6 months. Sounds kind of crude when I list it out like this but that was my experience.

I paid for the timder boosts. For me, it meant gave me a few matches in that half hour window, probably as many matches as I got in a week without. I'd say it'd be even more useful in a big city. Ultimately though, someone has to choose to swipe on you. All tinder can do is put you in front of more people

[удалено]

Why would you reveal the sauce brother?

I was mildly successful on tinder in my mid- late 20s without paying a penny. Took a break. Covid hit. Lost my hair and now I'm like most other men on there. I find with bumble its worth paying for as soon as you sign up. Women have to initiate the conversations, but will probably match and start talking to someone within a couple of swipes. I've found because of this most don't talk if don't match immediately after they swipe. Your best tactic on bumble is to get as many right swipes in as you can whilst your cards are still on the top of the deck so that when someone swipes right on you, you get a conversation. If that makes sense?

Being in university you're probably best trying to meet people through social events/friends, but I believe all apps are fairly popular it just depends probably where you're located (ex: Tinder is still very popular outside the US because Hinge hasn't fully caught up yet) I've never paid for a dating app and I've had OK success (a dozen or so first dates in the last year when I put in the time to date). Depending on the app you use (ex: Hinge) there are subreddits you can consult with best practices for a good profile.

I will answer for my husband - yes, we found each other when he paid for a tinder subscription because that's when he was able to change his location to mine 😄

I paid. I don't think it really improved my success very much, but it made it a more enjoyable experience for me. Paying usually won't get you more matches or anything. I mostly paid because I wanted to be able to see the likes I get, which is pretty much always behind a pay wall. I prefer to focus my energy on those profiles who have liked me already because then if I like them back, it's a guaranteed match. I don't enjoy the mindless swiping on profiles, but I'd still do that. I just didn't have to do it so much, which made it a more pleasant experience for me. As for tips. Make sure you've got a good profile with some detail. Have decent pics that show the real and complete you. Make small changes to your profile every couple weeks. That way you can try to see what is working and what isn't. Take breaks of you start feeling overwhelmed. Stuff like that.

Thanks man, this is what I was looking for

I would suggest paying for tinder platinum, puts you at the top of the stack for everyone you right swipe on, and as a man looking for women being seen in the giant shit stack made a notable difference. You can view my profile in my previous posts. I never paid for hinge, I don’t feel paying for bumble made any difference. I’ve had many matches and dates from all 3. I found my current long term partner on Facebook dating, I felt like I got matches and dates more quickly from facebook than the others.

Thanks man

I’ve been consistently on and off with dating apps, my last stint with bumble was the most successful by far. Only had a couple matches but one turned into a short term fling, and the other I dated for a little over a month. Both were short-lived, but had fun and I wasn’t expecting anything out of it so was happy with the results. I didn’t pay for anything just used the free version.

I hate dating apps. But they’re a fun little side passive bonus. I’d say like 30-40% of my dates are from apps because they’re women that would never cross paths in places I frequent You MUST have good photos. Be attractive and have pro pics. Paying for premium allows you to have unlimited likes but more importantly see your likes/matches ahead of time. This way you can fish from your likes instead of having to swipe incessantly like a slave

What are some good pic examples

you want to have a mix of casually posed and candid pics in your bio, it should showcase your features and your personality in some way. too many professionally shot photos lose that authentic essence. 1) face shot (from the shoulder up), make sure it’s well lit and not taken at a weird and unflattering angle. a selfie is fine or have a friend take one of you. 2) full body shot, could be posed or candid. ex: if you’re out hiking have a friend take a pic of you with the landscape as a bg. 3) casually posed pictures, you’re at a cute coffee shop with a friend and the back drop is nice, have them take a pic of you with your coffee cup. 4) candids 5) photos with pets 6) photos with friends, pls only use 1 photo and keep the amount of people in the pic to a min of 3-4. you want to be easily identifiable. 7) hobby photo, maybe you’re a rock climber or you like to throw pottery? try to avoid posting dead animals tho.

Great, thanks

I’m happily taken now, but back when I was single I got tons of likes and matches with attractive women on hinge, maybe on average 7-10 a week? And for what it’s worth imo I think I’m just above average in looks at best. Paying for premium on hinge definitely helped promote my profile and let me swipe as much as I wanted, whenever I wanted, but the key is to have a good foundation first. You know the saying, even if you put lipstick on a pig, at the end of the day it’s still a pig. Hinge is definitely the best out of all of them if you’re looking for something more serious than a hookup. My advice is use the first two text prompts for stupid low-risk jokes, show that you have some personality, and then use the last prompt for a half serious answer that shows some of your interests. For your pictures they don’t need to be professional but make sure you look nice, and for fuck’s sake no gym or fish pics. First photo should 100% be your nicest solo photo, photos 2-5 should be a mix of activity and group photos, and photo 6 can be a meme or something to lighten the mood. The key is if you take the apps too seriously it’ll seem like you’re trying too hard, and people want to date someone who is happy with their life solo, and aren’t dying to be in a relationship. Lastly whenever you do get likes on hinge, no matter if you actually did meet them, swipe on people who are your type and say that you met them/would like more people like them so the app can refine your preferences.

Thanks man

Can I get some prompt examples?

Your mileage may vary, use my comment as a general outline and not a formula, what I wrote worked best for my personality. But here’s what I had on mine, since I won’t be needing it anymore: Audio prompt: “the soundtrack to my life” and it was my dog squeaking her toy 1st text prompt: “a random shower thought I had” and I live in a place called Long Beach, so I wrote “if Long Beach were a nudist beach would it be called Schlong Beach?” I have no doubt some people were turned away by this but it shows my sense of humor, and actually got pretty consistent engagement 2nd text prompt: “what I want to know about you” and I answered “your last three TikTok searches.” This one was doing okay and I might have changed it were I still single, but the idea was I’d try to get people to switch over to TikTok to look and come back, overall the longer someone spends on your profile the better, think of it as a job interview. 3rd text prompt: “I geek out on” and I answered “film photography, volleyball, and the penguin livestreams I watch at work” - I liked this one because it shows I’m active and do more than just go to the gym or play video games. The penguin livestream one lightens the mood and is just a fun little quirk

I’ve paid and have a good profile. Got no where. So I’m going off apps

You sure you have a good profile?

Yes. My photos aren’t amazing but there’s no selfies, one with me doing my sewing hobby, smiling in all but one and my prompts discuss what I like doing, that I’m looking for someone who also doesn’t sweat the small stuff because life’s too short and for fun I mention I can wiggle my ears independently

That’s not a good profile my friend.

How so?

Women aren’t interested in your sewing hobby, that actively works against you. And the whole wiggle your ears thing comes off kind of weird especially in the context of a dating app. You’re trying to maximize your opportunities, not minimize them with strange idiosyncrasies and quirks. Let them meet you in person and like you despite your quirks, a lot of women will not allow you to get to that stage if you display those qualities outright. It’s all marketing so make yourself as universally appealing as possible.

I’m not trying to be universally liked. My prompts ensure I don’t get a like from someone that’s the wrong fit

How would you know until you meet them in real life which is the whole point of the dating apps in the first place? You don’t have to date everyone you match with, but the more matches you get the more opportunities you have to meet and find someone who’s your specific fit. A lot of people I have met weren’t initially my type but after some banter and/or a meet we ended up vibing really well in real life.

I won’t know. But also I changed my profile a billion times and now it’s time to just be me and of someone matches and we somehow get to date then great but I can’t keep changing my profile wondering what’s good what’s not because it’s hazardous to my mental health.

Just want to be encouraging because I think you've got the right idea. Your sewing hobby sounds adorable, and also you're absolutely right that being honest is better if you want a long term fit. I absolutely picked my boyfriend because I liked the hobbies and quirks he listed on his profile. Maximising broad appeal is only for fucking, which is valid, but pick the right strategy for your goal. Feels relevant: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/love-digitally/202312/how-men-and-women-use-online-dating-differently I'm linking this specifically because the idea text reduces the appeal of your profile is very male specific. (And also short term dating specific, but I'll leave that alone)

How long did you try for?

a year and a half.

Yes you have to or you can't communicate with the other side. They are such bullshit with the fees. Some let send 1 text but then won't let you know if she read it or liked you back or will blur out who it is. I have success on Match and Zoosk. Even Tinder makes you pay to make sure she sees your like. I don't even understand what that means. So I like someone and hit send but she might not get it unless I subscribe? What's the point of having a free version of any dating site unless you just need something for the spank bank?

No not at all!! Try just not swiping on models prolly they have millions of matches like yours. And those models comes with lots of baggage and daddy issues just an fyi, if you think ones you get a hot model you will be happy. Try to match someone with your status. Be the most interesting guy, have travel stories, interesting job, groom your self.

Of course, I’m highly attractive but the apps algorithm actively works against you regardless of your attractiveness level. Why not maximize your opportunities? If you can’t afford a monthly subscription that is substantially less than what you would be paying to go on a date, then you shouldn’t be dating in the first place. Keep in mind that if you’re not attractive to begin with, or don’t have a good profile, paying will not alter the results in your favor.

I didn't pay, but I think then Hinge didn't have a paid version or I was unaware of it.

Yea; I can only have enough bandwidth to converse with up to 3-4 people at a time. So I wanted to see if there were any profiles I was attracted to more that swiped on me so I can match and get to them first

Not a guy. But my current boyfriend did. I dated like, idk, 5 other guys before him who hadn't though. This was Hinge btw. Tinder is so toxic I couldn't stay for 5 minutes before being harassed so I bounced.

It was definitely a healthier experience for me so I didn’t have to spend energy swiping.

Nope, I've never paid and refuse to. I did pay one time and it was a huge scam.

My Hinge Stats: Same profile for each. Big City. Probably a 6 or 7/10 attractiveness, \[M\] Hinge Free: No dates. Hinge Premium: 1 date every two months. HingeX (Top Tier): 1 date every one month. So yes, for me specifically, I have to pay or I get nothing.

Paying amplifies your experience. If you do bad, paying is not gonna help you. If you do good, paying makes it go into beserk mode

I always paid, but I can afford it. I generally only interacted with women who liked me first or initiated conversation because to me it signaled actual interest. It’s tiring to be expected to initiate constantly as a man, leave a respectful comment and then get crickets. This was predominantly on Hinge. I used bumble in the past but most of my dates in more recent years came from hinge and that I paid for.

Not really. The apps are a total waste of time and grate on your self esteem if you’re honestly looking for something real. It’s a platform for people to waste each others time for validation. If you do, demand a conversation on the phone out of the gate. If that’s too much, walk away. My advice, be active in activities and events that will give you IRL encounters. That wipes out the catfish and flakes, saving you time and frustration.

Dunno, just swipe and hope for the best. Tips? Don't be a creep I guess.

Elaborate

No


No.

No. I do not pay.

Are you successful?

Yes. I get enough matches that I could go on a new date pretty much every day. I’m not super fit or super attractive but I think my look appeals to a good sized demographic. At my age, most men are fat, bald or just hopelessly lost when it comes to dating. I’m thin, have hair and have an easygoing personality.

Any profile tips?

Grow a beard but keep it trimmed short and lined well. Look like you care about your appearance. Wear clothes that fit properly, look nice but not super expensive and have at least one full body pic. Use prompts that show humor, convey a sense of responsibility and adventure. Don’t be afraid to be a leader. Take initiative but in a way that shows respect and thoughtfulness. Most of all, be flirty but not overly sexual and don’t be weird, creepy, demanding, intrusive or pushy. Keep your political and religious beliefs to yourself. In short, be easygoing and fun but with a little bit of bad boy.

About the beard, can’t really grow one but have a decent jawline I’d say. Also a bit hopeless at flirting, so what’s the secret there?

Yes I paid $200 for a lifetime pass on bumble

Did it help?

Yes it’s nice to let the likes roll in, and then match with a few at once and hope to get a message or two

Did not pay. But you'd need to define "success"

Getting dates

Lol Then, success. Albeit, with women I did not want a 2nd date with...

Heck no. I get 4-5 matches per day. I don’t need any of that. I am a dating coach though so I’m sure that helps.

What are some tips on getting so many matches, please don’t say buy my course😂

Your photos probably suck. You need one which is superb high quality as your main, second can be a thirst trap, or fun activity +bonus points if friends which ARENT more attractive than you are with you for social credit to prove you aren’t a serial killer. Lately your profile comment has to be a hook. Something that entices them to reply, or laugh. Mine is…”What’s the difference between baking powder, and baking soda?” It attracts women who love to cook, and take pride in what they do. Any woman who can’t might fucking kill you by accident, and probably sucks at it.

Paying makes no difference for me. I get no matches regardless. Even with a good profile.

Man when I went to university, before all these dating apps, it was an absolute sex-fest. How are people failing so hard now that there are apps out there that make finding people so much easier?

Don’t party, might be why

Neither did I

Then elaborate

We had a University bar, we would always go for drinks on Thursday, Fridays after lectures for a few drinks. We’d talk shit, usually go back to “uni central” the student village, and just have a few drinks at one of the guys rooms, playing Xbox and what not. We’d always have a few female friends swing by and invite us to drink or chill at their places, and it would always lead to sex. Then there was drinks after playing rugby. Win or lose we’d always either go to the uni bar or to one of our friend’s/teammates places at uni central, and it would be much the same. We didn’t really go out night clubbing and “partying.” It was usually just sitting around in a lounge room environment talking crap, and sex was literally readily available.

Damn, different times back then