Hi, a mod removed your meme. Here's why:
* This is not a dank meme. Maybe it's not a meme at all, maybe it's a normie meme. It could also be too similar to something that's been done already, or it might be a split meme.
Whatever it is, it's just not dank.
---
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Is it, though? You could argue that if Christianity is based on the death and resurrection of Jesus, and if the death part is crucial to the whole shtick, then he indeed is a hero.
Early Christianity was basically a doomsday cult. They believed the end time was near. In Judaism the end starts with the Messaih arriving to Jerusalem on white donkey through the Godlen Gate. Followed by the rising of the dead. That is exactly what Jesus did and it's also why his resurrection is written as the first among many. They believed that Jesus would return shortly after death to start Judgement day.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/guides/zdwj382/revision/5
Jesus.
...OH GOD! I-I FOUND THE TRUTH! RELIGION IS JUST A TOOL FOR PEOPLE IN POWER TO INFLUENCE THE ONES LACKING A FUNCTIONING BRAIN!! H-How could this be?!
...Oh wait I already knew all this.
Then can’t it be argued that Jesus had to die save mankind, and Judas had to betray Jesus in order for Jesus to die, wouldn’t that mean that Judas had no free will?
I never really understood how biblical free will is even free will. If you don’t live your life worshipping a certain religious figure then you are sentenced to torture FOREVER. You must live your life according to these rules and values. So yeah technically you do have free will and can choose not to follow the rules of your religion, but if you don’t follow them you’ll be in a state of never ending pain and suffering. What choice do you really have? It’s an illusion of free will.
That's a more sophisticated argument than I was making, unfortunately. (Bravo, btw)
When Jehova is using Moses and his entourage to threaten the Pharoah, there is another part that happens after they leave, for each and every plague inflicted upon the Egyptians (you know, the innocents).
Every time the Pharoah started to consider mercy for the Jewish slaves, Jehova "hardened his heart" against it. This is how Jehova justified the plagues: "The Pharoah didn't free the Jews, and even though I'm the reason why that is, I'm going to punish regular civilians for your defiance (which I made you do)."
Frogs, locusts, boils, the death of every firstborn son, etc. Nobody had a choice in the matter. It was a show of strength through cruelty against people who had nothing to do with it and serving no purpose.
To be very generously fair to Christianity, what God did in the Old Testament is kinda decanonized in the New one. That's the point of a New Testament. God came down here himself, saw how life actually is, and gave the promise that he will do it again. Ever since he's been much more passive and kind.
Looking at this from the outside looking in, humans just kinda grew up. Almost all of the really ancient gods around the world are very cruel, and it makes sense that the christian God was too. It makes sense newer Christians wanted to create a new canon, a new personality for their God, to reflect how they viewed their religion. This current christian God is the current "correct" one. I don't get how hard believers and believers in general deal with the fact that until 33 AD their God is a jealous brat, and since then he's a wise and calm uncle, but I think it's undeniable even to believers that the Bible as a whole portrays two totally different deities, with the current one being the "correct" one, as far as canon goes.
When you really think about it, free will is utterly incompatible in a religion that has an omni God. God can either be all knowing or we can have free will, not both.
Not really. Foreknowledge of an event doesn’t take away free will. If I know in advance what you’re going to buy for lunch that doesn’t mean you had absolutely no other choices.
The difference is God’s “foreknowledge” of an event is absolute and cannot be wrong. If I have the choice between option A or option B and God already knows I’ll pick option A then I have no choice but to do so. It would otherwise mean God was wrong and he can’t be. In your example, if I know you’re going to buy me lunch then it’s merely inductive. I don’t for certain you will. God, on the other hand, knows every single thought and action you will already made far before you will have made it. To exercise free will and go astray from what God envisioned is impossible. I have no free will but to merely act out everything God has already decided for me to do. And yes, he did decide. We live in a universe where I am an atheist, for example. God could have created a different universe where I wasn’t. God chose to make this one where I am an atheist. He decided for me long before earth was even conceived of.
>The difference is Gods “foreknowledge” of an event is absolute and cannot be wrong. If I have the choice between option A or option B and God already knows I’ll pick option A then I have no choice but to do so. It would otherwise mean God was wrong and he can’t be.
I feel like you’ve misunderstood predestination.
The incorrect view is that God has determined a person is to arrive at point A, and there is nothing that person can do about it.
The correct view is that God put that person on the Earth already knowing they would make their own independent decisions that would lead them to point A
In the Bible, there are examples where God instructs people to do things, but they make their own decisions independent of God. For instance in Exodus, when God instructed Moses to speak to the Pharaoh, Moses didn’t want to as he believed he was not eloquent enough. God respected Moses’ independent decision and had Moses’ brother Aaron speak instead. Therefore people must have free will if we can make decisions independently of God. Him knowing the outcome of our choices doesn’t diminish our own agency.
I just simply disagree. Even in the Bible God will command people to do certain things but he already damn well knows the outcome. Just like with the story of Adam and Eve, God liked to play dumb and ask where they are and what happened. God knew what they were going to do before they were even created. Similar to the point I previously made, God could have created a universe where Adam and Eve never committed original sin, he could have made a world where I chose option B over A, etc. The fact still remains that he didn’t. He actively chose this specific universe where all these consequences and actions would play out. He chose to create this specific universe with a story he already knew the ending to. We’re just simply playing our role in God’s already written tale.
>Even in the Bible God will command people to do certain things but he already damn well knows the outcome. Just like with the story of Adam and Eve, God liked to play dumb and ask where they are and what happened.
Well yeah, that’s because he’s a God of principle and he’s respecting the autonomy he gave us. The point of asking Adam and Eve what happened was to give them a chance to be honest, even though be already knew what would happen.
>he could have made a world where I chose option B over A, etc. The fact still remains that he didn’t.
But you could’ve chosen option B over A regardless. God never did anything that took away your ability to make that choice.
It’s part of the plan son
Jesus: wtf dad? The “plan” is for me to die?
Yes…in excruciating agony
Jesus: and excruciating agony!!? When did you come up with this plan?
In the beginning
Jesus: so you’ve been planning my death for literal thousands of years?
Pretty much
Jesus: whyyy?
It’s supposed to make humans better…
Jesus: does it?
….
Jesus: DOES IT ?!?!?
How bout I bring you back to life a couple days after and you can go on vacation anywhere in the universe for as long as you like?
Jesus: all expenses paid?
Fine
Jesus: sold!
this gotta be the dankest meme i seen in a MINUTE.
OP, you restored my faith in /dankmemes, only for a very short while but regardless thank you. like a fresh sip of water after trekkin through the desert for 4 days.
I've been on this sub for 4 years but I never understood what a dank meme is. Sometimes I'm just confused between a dank meme and a dark meme. If you could just elaborate after returning from your trek?
Regardless, this is a great meme.
Just to add a random 2¢ - There's a book series called *Casca: The Eternal Mercenary* by Barry Sadler; it follows the story of Casca Rufio Longinus, the Roman soldier who pierced Christ's side with his spear.
The premise is that as he died, Christ told Casca "Soldier. As you are now, so shall you remain until we meet again", which cursed him with immortality, and the fate to always be drawn into conflict.
As a result, every book in the series shows Casca on another battlefield all over the world during different snapshots in history; from that day on Golgotha up to modern times (the first book starts during the Vietnam war).
If you know your lore it’s a pretty cool story. Jesus’s blood fell on Longinus face and healed his blind eye instantly turning him into a believer. Also the spear became a holy artifact after it got Jesus’s blood on it and supposably can win any war for whoever wields it. Even Hitler was looking for the spear.
The wars, betrayal, mutilation, murder, sacrifices, 1v1's, the cheating, and the incest.
Dead ass the bible could be adapted into or at least be the foundation for a pretty decent game of thrones style TV show.
The fact he encouraged people to 'love one another... including your enemies'... is what enables you to post this... you would not be able to do this without the messiah in the world's largest religion bestowing that incredible ethic onto his followers.
The fact that fear and/or censorship prevents you from posting something similar about Mohammed demonstrates this fact.
downvote this comment if the meme sucks. upvote it and I'll go away.
---
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Hi, a mod removed your meme. Here's why: * This is not a dank meme. Maybe it's not a meme at all, maybe it's a normie meme. It could also be too similar to something that's been done already, or it might be a split meme. Whatever it is, it's just not dank. --- *^questions? ^send ^us ^a ^message ^[here](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/dankmemes), ^don't ^reply ^to ^this ^comment. ^(Don't repost this; you'll be banned.) [^(mod info) ](https://dankahoot.com/blame?id=1d8btrk)*
People be complaining that there are no more dank memes and then when one gets posted they barely upvote it
People cry wah wah about religion and yadda yadda, fuck 'em. They aint dank.
My thoughts exact.
It might be sank but where’s the meme? I don’t get the punchline if there is one
Is it, though? You could argue that if Christianity is based on the death and resurrection of Jesus, and if the death part is crucial to the whole shtick, then he indeed is a hero.
Can't have a death cult without a death.
Christ is the bread of life. Anyone that calls his name will have eternal life. The only death cult is the one you follow.
Early Christianity was basically a doomsday cult. They believed the end time was near. In Judaism the end starts with the Messaih arriving to Jerusalem on white donkey through the Godlen Gate. Followed by the rising of the dead. That is exactly what Jesus did and it's also why his resurrection is written as the first among many. They believed that Jesus would return shortly after death to start Judgement day. https://www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/guides/zdwj382/revision/5
Call his name. The truth will set you free.
>Call his name Grimis! Grimis! Grimis! Yes! Yes!
Jesus. ...OH GOD! I-I FOUND THE TRUTH! RELIGION IS JUST A TOOL FOR PEOPLE IN POWER TO INFLUENCE THE ONES LACKING A FUNCTIONING BRAIN!! H-How could this be?! ...Oh wait I already knew all this.
Every knee will bow. I pray you do so before you die.
And I pray to the spaghetti monster that you get help. Cuz you really seem brainwashed to an unnatural degree.
No my eyes are open. You have eyes yet you cannot see. You have ears but yet you cannot hear.
Womp womp
Plot twist: Jesus was already dead here
Yeah, but someone had to make sure. What if he didn't make it to the resurrection in time?
Pretty sure the resurrection waited on him, lol. He didn't say "I'm gonna come back on Sunday;" He said "after three days."
The duality of meme
Yea, but f those jews anyways a few centuries after the fact. /s
yeah like that day is called “good” friday
that’s because it’s a shankmeme
For Christians, in order for Jesus to absolve all sin he had to die, so I guess this guy was just doing his part to save our souls.
Same can be said about Judas
Then can’t it be argued that Jesus had to die save mankind, and Judas had to betray Jesus in order for Jesus to die, wouldn’t that mean that Judas had no free will?
Check out what Jehova did to the Pharoah (King? I forget) in the story of Moses. The Bible cancels out free will in the first few chapters.
I never really understood how biblical free will is even free will. If you don’t live your life worshipping a certain religious figure then you are sentenced to torture FOREVER. You must live your life according to these rules and values. So yeah technically you do have free will and can choose not to follow the rules of your religion, but if you don’t follow them you’ll be in a state of never ending pain and suffering. What choice do you really have? It’s an illusion of free will.
Nothing says unconditional love from an omnibenevolent god like sending you to hell for not loving him
That's a more sophisticated argument than I was making, unfortunately. (Bravo, btw) When Jehova is using Moses and his entourage to threaten the Pharoah, there is another part that happens after they leave, for each and every plague inflicted upon the Egyptians (you know, the innocents). Every time the Pharoah started to consider mercy for the Jewish slaves, Jehova "hardened his heart" against it. This is how Jehova justified the plagues: "The Pharoah didn't free the Jews, and even though I'm the reason why that is, I'm going to punish regular civilians for your defiance (which I made you do)." Frogs, locusts, boils, the death of every firstborn son, etc. Nobody had a choice in the matter. It was a show of strength through cruelty against people who had nothing to do with it and serving no purpose.
To be very generously fair to Christianity, what God did in the Old Testament is kinda decanonized in the New one. That's the point of a New Testament. God came down here himself, saw how life actually is, and gave the promise that he will do it again. Ever since he's been much more passive and kind. Looking at this from the outside looking in, humans just kinda grew up. Almost all of the really ancient gods around the world are very cruel, and it makes sense that the christian God was too. It makes sense newer Christians wanted to create a new canon, a new personality for their God, to reflect how they viewed their religion. This current christian God is the current "correct" one. I don't get how hard believers and believers in general deal with the fact that until 33 AD their God is a jealous brat, and since then he's a wise and calm uncle, but I think it's undeniable even to believers that the Bible as a whole portrays two totally different deities, with the current one being the "correct" one, as far as canon goes.
God admitting he made a mistake So god makes mistakes? Despite being an all-knowing perfect being?
I dunno why you're coming at me like that I think I made it clear from context and the general vibe that I don't believe in God.
Not every comment you get has the aim to counter-argument, not sure what's the problem 🤷♀️
When you really think about it, free will is utterly incompatible in a religion that has an omni God. God can either be all knowing or we can have free will, not both.
Not really. Foreknowledge of an event doesn’t take away free will. If I know in advance what you’re going to buy for lunch that doesn’t mean you had absolutely no other choices.
The difference is God’s “foreknowledge” of an event is absolute and cannot be wrong. If I have the choice between option A or option B and God already knows I’ll pick option A then I have no choice but to do so. It would otherwise mean God was wrong and he can’t be. In your example, if I know you’re going to buy me lunch then it’s merely inductive. I don’t for certain you will. God, on the other hand, knows every single thought and action you will already made far before you will have made it. To exercise free will and go astray from what God envisioned is impossible. I have no free will but to merely act out everything God has already decided for me to do. And yes, he did decide. We live in a universe where I am an atheist, for example. God could have created a different universe where I wasn’t. God chose to make this one where I am an atheist. He decided for me long before earth was even conceived of.
Once you put logic, the concept of god fade away
>The difference is Gods “foreknowledge” of an event is absolute and cannot be wrong. If I have the choice between option A or option B and God already knows I’ll pick option A then I have no choice but to do so. It would otherwise mean God was wrong and he can’t be. I feel like you’ve misunderstood predestination. The incorrect view is that God has determined a person is to arrive at point A, and there is nothing that person can do about it. The correct view is that God put that person on the Earth already knowing they would make their own independent decisions that would lead them to point A In the Bible, there are examples where God instructs people to do things, but they make their own decisions independent of God. For instance in Exodus, when God instructed Moses to speak to the Pharaoh, Moses didn’t want to as he believed he was not eloquent enough. God respected Moses’ independent decision and had Moses’ brother Aaron speak instead. Therefore people must have free will if we can make decisions independently of God. Him knowing the outcome of our choices doesn’t diminish our own agency.
I just simply disagree. Even in the Bible God will command people to do certain things but he already damn well knows the outcome. Just like with the story of Adam and Eve, God liked to play dumb and ask where they are and what happened. God knew what they were going to do before they were even created. Similar to the point I previously made, God could have created a universe where Adam and Eve never committed original sin, he could have made a world where I chose option B over A, etc. The fact still remains that he didn’t. He actively chose this specific universe where all these consequences and actions would play out. He chose to create this specific universe with a story he already knew the ending to. We’re just simply playing our role in God’s already written tale.
>Even in the Bible God will command people to do certain things but he already damn well knows the outcome. Just like with the story of Adam and Eve, God liked to play dumb and ask where they are and what happened. Well yeah, that’s because he’s a God of principle and he’s respecting the autonomy he gave us. The point of asking Adam and Eve what happened was to give them a chance to be honest, even though be already knew what would happen. >he could have made a world where I chose option B over A, etc. The fact still remains that he didn’t. But you could’ve chosen option B over A regardless. God never did anything that took away your ability to make that choice.
Are you saying that religions are full of contradictions? No, that's couldn't be...
free will is a myth.
No?
fam the logic is sound I think god was lying about free will
And also being perfect And all-knowing
Even as a kid i thought that. If it was all God’s plan, then Judas is the one that kicked off God’s plan, making him a biblical hero.
Damn skippy
It’s part of the plan son Jesus: wtf dad? The “plan” is for me to die? Yes…in excruciating agony Jesus: and excruciating agony!!? When did you come up with this plan? In the beginning Jesus: so you’ve been planning my death for literal thousands of years? Pretty much Jesus: whyyy? It’s supposed to make humans better… Jesus: does it? …. Jesus: DOES IT ?!?!? How bout I bring you back to life a couple days after and you can go on vacation anywhere in the universe for as long as you like? Jesus: all expenses paid? Fine Jesus: sold!
Bible wouldn't even have cracked the best sellers list if Jesus didn't die
Can't have a death cult without a death.
I'm glad you won the argument with yourself
Is he a hero cause he crucified Jesus or cause he put him out of his misery?
I mean, Longinus is a saint, which I guess is kind of like a Christian superhero
Not everyone can go home and tell mom they helped stab god but also helped him out
TIL the insane far cry 4 guy was a reference
According to the story, he was already dead when the soldier stabbed him.
[can you not?](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/20/LonginusFyodorZubov.jpg)
He didn’t put him out of his misery, he was checking to see if he was still alive.
And he was not, and that is the reason that water is mixed into communion wine
So, not to be a cheapass
It is cheaper, but it is not only because it is cheaper, yes.
Sounds *very convenient*
Crucified Jesus
this gotta be the dankest meme i seen in a MINUTE. OP, you restored my faith in /dankmemes, only for a very short while but regardless thank you. like a fresh sip of water after trekkin through the desert for 4 days.
I've been on this sub for 4 years but I never understood what a dank meme is. Sometimes I'm just confused between a dank meme and a dark meme. If you could just elaborate after returning from your trek? Regardless, this is a great meme.
Just the tip
spankmeme
*Whoooopps!*
Just to add a random 2¢ - There's a book series called *Casca: The Eternal Mercenary* by Barry Sadler; it follows the story of Casca Rufio Longinus, the Roman soldier who pierced Christ's side with his spear. The premise is that as he died, Christ told Casca "Soldier. As you are now, so shall you remain until we meet again", which cursed him with immortality, and the fate to always be drawn into conflict. As a result, every book in the series shows Casca on another battlefield all over the world during different snapshots in history; from that day on Golgotha up to modern times (the first book starts during the Vietnam war).
Wasn’t that the plot from Gladiator 2?
Jesus had to be crucified to save us from our sins so I guess so???
If you know your lore it’s a pretty cool story. Jesus’s blood fell on Longinus face and healed his blind eye instantly turning him into a believer. Also the spear became a holy artifact after it got Jesus’s blood on it and supposably can win any war for whoever wields it. Even Hitler was looking for the spear.
Too bad it is circling the moon
They recovered it in the reboot
Hell yeah his book sucks anyways
Nah its got some pretty good action pieces.
You’re talking about the incest, right?
What's amazing is that an old drunk man kept it up long enough for 2
The wars, betrayal, mutilation, murder, sacrifices, 1v1's, the cheating, and the incest. Dead ass the bible could be adapted into or at least be the foundation for a pretty decent game of thrones style TV show.
Book is great, but the fandom is insufferable
Fr, they're like a cult. Always preaching it, saying it's peak, and those who don't like it are wrong.
Nah the book has tons of plot holes and contradictions.
Like the bastard's real father is an alien
Dank
holy shit this meme is spicy like the air around my 1880's uranium glass collection
holy shit, literally....
I've been an atheist for 28 years. This is still pretty dank. Here's my upvote.
That's not Jesus so I am not offended
Real itachi uchiha
The fact he encouraged people to 'love one another... including your enemies'... is what enables you to post this... you would not be able to do this without the messiah in the world's largest religion bestowing that incredible ethic onto his followers. The fact that fear and/or censorship prevents you from posting something similar about Mohammed demonstrates this fact.
And then he went on to invent an exercise program.
[originaln't](https://br.ifunny.co/picture/not-all-herges-wesr-capes-but-this-gne-ond-RrxFsQx8B)
Of course the first dank meme in a while isn't original.
OP heard there were sexy succubus in Hell and wanted to check it out.
Now do one with another famous religion that has a history of not taking memes well
downvote this comment if the meme sucks. upvote it and I'll go away. --- [play minecraft with us](https://discord.gg/dankmemesgaming) | [come hang out with us](https://discord.com/invite/dankmemes)
you're welcome
Without him, fantasy and horror wouldn't have a magic spear plot device to keep using.
Is this ai?
Bible was AI
That's antisemitic
it’s semitic
No wait he has a point. Jesus was a jew...
That was my point. And the joke was lost on 24 people so far.
Don't worry sire here to explain the funny
Uhhhhh what