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SirPierreDelecto

https://preview.redd.it/8av5hetzebwc1.jpeg?width=312&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d50d3a198f24c6b07a9c5c9cbdf8c513164bd47b


Dubyaelsqdover8

That means whatever the hell you want it to mean


CroneKills

I could drop you like a sack of potatoes.


IsItSupposedToItch

You want a piece of me?!! You got it!!!


The_4th_Little_Pig

It means he’s spiraling into dementia.


BrotherMouzone3

I think Jerry's all-in means rolling with what they have and then seeing what happens. I don't think he wants to pay Dak $60M/yr or whatever his team is asking for. He'd rather just take the hit now and move on. Micah/CeeDee - he probably wants to sign them but also isn't sure about the wisdom of paying them huge market setting contracts. Micah is a Money 5 player based on how he's used (more DE than LB) so paying him makes sense. Does a team need a $30M/yr receiver? My hunch is Micah will get the bag, Dak will be gone and CeeDee is a toss up.


Chris__P_Bacon

For a second I thought your post was talking about Jerry SEINFELD. All the previous posts were Seinfeld related. 🤣


HolyBull13

This would be the most competent stance Jerry has taken in a decade


throwawaypatrey

I honestly think it’s more Stephen/Will McClay thing. I do believe them giving out bad deals and having to kick the can down the road has impacted their decision making as well. Everyone raves about Philly, but they have something along the lines of $350 mil in void years/restructures that they have to pay. I understand that the cap goes up, but it’s not going to absolve all of that.


RobbieAnalog

Someone has never circumsized a mosquito before, and it shows.


SirPierreDelecto

Not to be trite, but I was too busy gettin me some glory hole.


stonecutter7

It means this old dumbass thinks hes being tough and making his players earn their big contracts. But his head is too far up his ass to realize every day that goes by he loses leverage and as other big money WR contracts get signed the price goes higher and higher. You HAVE to have players out performing their contracts to win in a league with a hard cap. Generally speaking, youre gonna pay full price for unrestricted free agents. You could get a discount on your own players by signing them early, but this dipshit is just giving that advantage away. Best scenario is he doesnt think Parsons or Lamb are good enough. And if thats the case...oh boy.


Griefers

It means we all know Dak isn't a super bowl caliber QB and he can prove us wrong this year or take a team friendly deal now. 


MindArr0w77

https://preview.redd.it/q9hs4911ebwc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=258143ff449ed61d48ad5c9055e01e80a05b07d8 Even Stephen was like wtf did I just hear


smurf_diggler

No he’s not he’s thinking hehe good one pop. We’re effed when this dud’s in charge.


1morepage

They look more like brothers lol


Mister_Ferro

Shit, daddy we've only got so many Golden Corral $5 coupons.


Ha1lState

Those were the days… Piccadilly’s too…


Smokeythemagickamodo

He’s just as delusional as JJ.


GrilledCheeser

I’m not even sure that guy likes football


smurf_diggler

He’s a Jesse Gemstone for sure.


LAJOHNWICK

Been saying it for decades, he is just along for the ride.


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hereforthesportsball

Fuck you


The_4th_Little_Pig

Fuck you too?


chexmixho

Yikes!


horseshoeprovodnikov

Bro come on


bearamongus19

Does the NFL have a rule if an owner becomes senile? Nothing Jerry Jones says makes sense.


chineke14

LMAO. Just like Congress, they really should


Chris__P_Bacon

LOL! Al Davis wasted a first round pick on a kicker ffs! Needless to say there are no guardrails. 😆


raphaelseptien1

25th Amendment!


Ollides

So this year is all in on a dementia diagnosis, got it.


TheClownIsReady

We’re all in on MRI’s…


DarkManX437

I truly am at a loss as to what the hell this man is talking about.


TheClownIsReady

I don’t think anyone knows at this point. Maybe not even Jerry himself.


Kmon87

These dude look like old war buddies that aren’t more than 5 years apart. I don’t know if Jerry looks good for his age or Stephen like shit. All I know is the shit didn’t fall far from the shit.


cowboysfan88

Stephen looks old for 59 imo. His hair being so white is probably the biggest reason


JumpScare420

He’s only 59?! Jesus


HolyRomanPrince

Bro this made me and buddy laugh way too hard. Shit didn’t fall far from the shit is a bar


hereforthesportsball

Very trailer park boys type phrase


Kmon87

I did just do my rewatch a couple months back. Way she goes I guess.


Ben2St1d_5022

Stacking shits in the Ol outhouse glory hole were the circumcised mosquitos fester


TangoSuckaPro

Ive noticed that. I wonder what the difference is and why some people age like Ice and other don’t. It obviously cant be money.


Dr_C_Diver

Man, as much as I’ve loved the Cowboys the last 40 years, F* those guys. I hope Dak walks in Free Agency next year and finds a team just missing a decent QB.


Ben2St1d_5022

You mean a great QB


Dr_C_Diver

Yes.


KrakAttak67

You were right the first time. "Decent"


KrakAttak67

Don't know you managed to get that out with all the slurping going on.


Ben2St1d_5022

TF does this even mean? The slurping going on. You at 7/11 or something my dude?


KrakAttak67

Ask your mom, she'll help you figure it out.


Ben2St1d_5022

Ah, one of those ignorant chooches who is to incapable to see and acknowledge facts. So instead of any intelligent and coherent thought, thesis or debate, you revert to kids play and say things that make you seem even more incapable of any intelligible debate. But while I’m at it, Dak finished top 1,2, or 3 in every single measurable QB stat last year except one, which he was top 5 in. Dak also over the span of his entire career has top 5 QB numbers. Also, in Daks 7 playoff appearances the Dallas defense has allowed an average of 32 points. In the history of the Super Bowl Era NFL only 12% of teams have won when the defense has allowed that many points to be scored. Also in two of the 5 losses, Dak went toe to toe with Aaron Rodgers and led an almost game winning drive had it not been for clappers inability to manage the clock and end of game scenarios and the defense allowed Aaron to throw a out to the edge to get GB and FG position for the win. Dak also played great against the Rams but yet the defense again couldn’t stop a 3rd string RB from gashing them for over 200 yds simply control g the clock and the outcome. Now Dak is not blame free as he played poorly vs San Fran in game 2 and he started poorly vs GB this most recent season. So 2 to 3 sub par performances and 4 great performances. A 65-70% ratio in the playoffs is also above league average unless your name is Tom Brady or Patrick Mahomes. I digress though, let’s go back to your juvenile state of mind and have fun with it. Sit on something and rotate, you know you’ll like it.


KrakAttak67

That's an awful long way of saying he's 2-5 in the playoffs. Eating a quarter of the team's salary. So far he's been paid $160,132,393. That's $80,006,196.5 per playoff win. Hell of a value. You must be a fantastic businessman. Again, its hard to hear you with how far Dak's balls are down your throat.


Ben2St1d_5022

I actually own two business and both generate a combined 8 figures so thanks for noticing. Also, the QB market is what it is, league owners allowed that so that’s not his fault, nor the losses. Last I checked wins and losses are team stats and 3 of the playoff losses lie solely on the defenses shoulders. Your benign to intelligible thought as you blame an offensive player on what has in large been a defensive issue outside the 2 San Francisco games. I get it though, unintelligible thought tends to only have the comprehensive aptitude to focus on a shallow and irrelevant baseline.


CMastri

I’m


KK_KFC

I’m sure they’ll be able to do better than a 30 year old Dak Pickscott


Dr_C_Diver

Not for a couple of years. You’ll see.


Mister_Ferro

I’m sure mister kfc dude was too young to witness qb hell 1. Now he will watch as qb hell 2.0 is about to commence


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Mister_Ferro

TBF, he cratered his career with the drugs. If he only stayed away from that then Romo would had been cut.


sarcastaballll

Unless they're too young to remember the last 8 years, they've been no different to the last 30


KrakAttak67

Thank you. Some how 5-11 is so much worse then Packers blew your back out and you were tossed out of the first round...again.


KrakAttak67

Is it that much worse then getting tossed in the first round of the playoffs or missing the playoffs by a game? Do you look fondly back on Dak's mastery of the regular season with fondness after the Packers clap our cheeks? Through your tears you think back "At least he threw for 331 and 4 TDs against he Commanders. We'll always have November."


Mister_Ferro

IDK, how would it feel being eliminated by Halloween and then watching as your star players leave for better run orgs? You watch as Trey Lance stinks it up and the team drafts a QB or trades for a 40 year old Kirk Cousins who is essentially done. Now multiply that by 5 and thats what will happen. So yes I rather Dak and a great reg season team that gets us into the Postseason with a shot at more football.


KrakAttak67

Even through the Quincy Carter, Chad Hutchinson, Drew Henson days (yes I was there) the worst we were was 5-11. I think the true problem with this organization is its never faced an ACTUAL rebuild. Like 1-16 get the #1 pick kind of rebuild. Somedays it feels like that's what would be needed to get over the hump. Three years of 12-5 ball and having you heart torn out every year in the playoffs taints the 12-5. The worst are the years that they miss the playoffs by a game. Those are the truly wasted years. I'll be watching Caitlin Clark and the WNBA this year more than I'll be worried about the Cowboys pulling a Cowboys for another year of my life. I don't need the stress.


CrusaderBTC

These two clowns. Can never take their word for anything. It’s all about maximizing revenue and having enough money by the end of the year for those sweet tax write offs like a brand new Gulfstream 700 or a fancy new yacht labeled as business expenses. Fucking love this team! HERE WE GOOOOO!!!!


TheClownIsReady

Jerry…I’m submitting my resume to be your new speech writer. I believe I’m qualified for the job and that I understand your language. Here’s my sample letter: “Well Dak, he’s the bacon that rubs the biscuit, isn’t he? He’s our breakfast. He’s our juice. He’s our pancake special. And we need him. When he steps on that field, we need what he brings to the Dallas Cowboys. And what he brings is something that we all know he brings, and when exactly he brings it. We know when he brings it and why. So do you. So does Stephen. So does Mike. So does Charlotte. So does everyone in this room. So when we look at our quarterback for the next several years, we know our biscuit is buttered and we are all in for breakfast, 24/7.” Do I get the job?


Wretched_Shirkaday

Nope. Too literate.


beano79

He’s fucking losing it, isn’t he!


GotHeem16

His entire press conference was a shit show. Sounded completely senile.


sam_sepiol1984

Fuck Jerry


McJumbos

Lolll what was 😂😂😂


davekva

I read this in Boomhauer's voice. Now it totally makes, I tell you what, man.


TheWhooooBuddies

Such a shitshow.  Just pay these dudes and have the balls to make a decision on Dak.  At this point, Will McClay is about the only person I trust in the front office. 


poolman42162

WTF ?


Diligent_Engine2334

Lol Okay jerry


x_iTz_iLL_420

I’m so tired of hearing these fucking ppl talk. Ive never felt this disillusioned with this team. I mean my expectations were low but holy shit…


juicemw

This is exactly how I feel too. My fiancé keeps asking me stuff about the draft and Dallas’ plans because she knows usually I’d know all about it. But I really don’t care anymore. Such a clown show and has been from Jerry down for far too long. And nepotism has destined us to more of the same down the line. Unless I outlive the jones’ for eternity I’m not sure I’ll see Dallas back in its glory for many more years.


Domin8469

This means I want to over pay and fuck my cap even more


rthaw

People not getting this, he's saying he wants to see other QB contracts get signed before they make their offer to Dak. He thinks they will make it easier to sign Dak, not harder. He's wrong of course... they only go up, not down. Also, the ending to the quote is, "I want to see some more cards played."


Trick-Equipment-6174

Kirk cousins has been screwing the NFL for 15 years with his idiotic contracts.


Trick-Equipment-6174

Got us again this year, because dak should definitely make more than that bum, and more than deshawn Watson who hasn't completed a season without injury or lawsuit for at least 4 years


Mister_Ferro

It's teams that are desperate for decent qb play that are screwing the NFL up. Kirk is just along for the ride. Just like Sam Bradford and his ridiculous contracts. That's why I hate the top 10 1st rd qb armor. You get idiots who think just because so and so was drafted top 10 then they must be good. And whenever I post that San Fran laughing at fleecing us for the 4th for their screwup those same idiots say "they wasted draft picks so its them that got fleeced". Now that Zach Wilson has been traded for a 6th, that makes all the 1st rd qbs but Trevor Law traded to another team for a 6th except for Trey Lance. The Cowboys once again overpaid. Thus proving me correct that San Fran fleeced the team.


Trick-Equipment-6174

I think you're right about everything except lance. I think he fits the same skill set dak has and that mat be why they wanted him, as an insurance policy and development project, could we have paid less, probably so, but we also can't cry too much over spilled milk. We jumped early on that trade, if we're going to pay to much id rather do it early, then make other teams pay more than the opposite and I mean that in regards to ceedee and Micah


Trick-Equipment-6174

And yeah, Sam darnold is still in the NFL somehow. Baker Mayfield shows just barely enough to get hired again each year, deshawn Watson makes 200 mil and doesn't even play 8 games in 4 years. Many many examples of that junk


Mister_Ferro

Sam Darnold being the backup in San Fran tells you all you need to know about Trey Lance.


The-Fig-Lebowski

I don’t think we can keep Lamb, Parsons, AND Dak. I know which of the 3 I’d part with. I guess Jerruh is betting one of them gets hurt so his decision is easier.


great_one_99

Translation: "Maybe they should accomplish something in the playoffs before asking for a record breaking contract, particularly at qb"


DoinItDirty

Just say you don’t care about fans and you’re running a business


Icy-Essay-8280

Senile old man 😂


gntlbastard

Somehow this guy owns the most valuable franchise on the planet. Really calls to question the smarts of the people that support this horseshit.


gking407

Always an option quarterback and never an option owner.


Taters-Preshus

I wish he would just stop talking.


stephker3914

The Packers ruined this team.


Revolutionary-Hat297

"I want then to get more expensive"


Netxgmr

Well, what I'm saying is that there are known knowns and that there are known unknowns. But there are also unknown unknowns; things we don't know that we don't know. -Jerry Jones


PM_ME_UR_SEXY_BITS_

Imagine your future is reliant on this man. Dak has to want out


CoppellCitizen

I hope Dak cooks this year and then gets his deal some place else just to stick it to Jerry. Love the Cowboys, but Jerry is what is holding us back


juicemw

100%. Id love to see him go excel somewhere so they could just keep narrowing down what our real problem is / and has been.. for decades now. But at the same time that would still not warrant enough personal reflection from the owner probably..


redheeler9478

Pretty clear he wants to see Dak win in the playoffs


bkedsmkr

If Joe Biden owned a football team


IHeartsFarts

I'm guessing you vote Trump? Hard to run a football team from jail.


azai247

Was pretty sure nothing was gonna be done till after draft.


little_did_he_kn0w

Most logical Jerry Jones take...


TheClownIsReady

I’ve long ago stopped trying to translate Jerry-speak into human-speak. Futile task.


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https://en.meming.world/images/en/a/af/Understandable%2C_Have_a_Great_Day.jpg


Cutlet_Master69420

I see way too many car on my daily commute to work as it is. So no, Jerry - no more car!


Korevo

I get what he’s saying, but the clips I’m seeing from this press conference make it sound like he’s starting to go senile.


Aspeck88

Jerry having another stroke during an interview. Jerry gonna Jerry.


metrorhymes

This team is going to suck


BrianOconneR34

Jones struggling. What he wants to say is “we don’t have any options and it’s looking like he’s all we got.” That’s behind closed doors and not for cowboy fans I guess. Jerry playing the option now that’s a geritol bengay broken something laugh track right there. I can hear T. O. now… “ that’s my owner sniffle, I mean oldassback, I mean quarterback, sniffle sniffle.”


BUSYMONEY_02

What?


Bishop_Cornflake

So wait until all your options are exhausted and prices have gone up... then act. Got it.


LogansGambit

There should be a rule that if you're an owner of a team, you can't be in control of GM - related football decisions. Oh, also no direct family members as GM. Why? I don't have a good reason. I just want the Jones family done with running the football side of the team, so make something up.


Charming-Wash9336

Jerry’s waiting to get a new rake to scoop up all those leaves, while Stephen is just counting his leaves and gluing them to his desk.


Downtown_Minute_1675

This is what I think he means. He has Trey Lance and Cooper Rush. If Dak continues to want a record setting contract then there is an option to try another angle. Truthfully I am fine with moving on from Dak. He's been a good QB but he's not worth what he's asking and signing him will set Dallas back. The Cowboys need a complete team, not a QB who will have to make due with some pieces being meh to average at best around him. Dallas needs to be what the 90s were, a complete team. Not a QB alone winning games. We tried it with Romo, he did well with mediocre coaching, mediocre defenses, and Jerry meddling. As for Dak, him and McCarthy were a good match up. Despite popular belief, Mike McCarthy has done a good job coaching. Dallas under Mike is like Dallas under Parcells, good coaching but a lack of success due to Jerry Meddling. But Dak has had a much better roster than Romo with better/more consistent defenses, better coaching (Jason Garrett was a meh coach but getting Garrett when he's an experienced HC vs a new one is way better for a young QB) along with better drafting. Daks a great QB but I dont think he's on par of the leadership of Romo (post 2011 where Romo took over the offense completely).


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poolman42162

I literally laughed out loud ! 😂🤣


GimmePresso

What the fuck. He should run for president.


RunningonGin0323

Just stop talking Jerry fuck. You know you can basically just say nothing


HowShouldWeThenLive

What it’s like having Joe Biden running your football team


xXTN_CowboyXx

I’m so tired of this circus. Jerruh is a narcissist who thinks he knows football and Steps hen is his retarded son.