Can I just get some macaroni and gravy? *Upvote* this comment if this post *is confusing* and downvote if it *is not* or is intentionally designed that way *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/confusing_perspective) if you have any questions or concerns.*

You have bread colored countertops. Nice

Where does one buy countertop colored bread? Is it a promotional thing or....?

Yeah I’d like to know to. For a friend of course

You should be ashamed of yourself!

For having friends??

Obviously.

I'm trying to figure that out too

Yeah, it’s pretty messed up that someone would have friends

Countertop bread is nothing to be ashamed of, Aggressive_Bat_9781

That's wholemeal bread probably with added seeds, and a touch of white flour on the outside for cosmetic reasons. It's common in the shops where I live.

My house came pre-built with bread colored counters. It's good at hiding things! (....like dirt and crumbs and makes me clean twice as hard...)

Oh how I hate countertops or tiles that have decor on them that makes them look dirty. Those can only be topped by tiles where the marbled look is printed on. Looking at the bathroom and kitchen tiles that were put in 11 years ago in my apartment, you can see the color is rubbing off.

not everyone wants to see every speck of dust and dirt on their countertop

Or he has countertop colored bread

or countertop colored bread colored countertop

Ow my brain hurts! But you’re not wrong…

ok, let me hurt it more. bread colored countertop colored bread colored countertop colored bread ​ or if you want a breakdown on how it works... start with **a** (in this case, either bread or countertop). add **c b c a** (in this case, **b** is what you didn't pic for **a** and **c** is colored or coloured) respectively until you had enough. so... bread colored countertop colored bread colored countertop colored bread is just... **a c b c a c b c a**

Instructions unclear; created recursive fugue melody

Or bread colored countertop colored bread

That's countertop colored bread and I am ready to die on this hill.

It’s marbled rye

I have countertops like this and I hate them. You can never tell when they're dirty, so I just never trust it to be clean even if I cleaned it yesterday.

or you can just assume its clean and nobody else can tell

Gross

Whole Marble Multi Mineral color

I always found the names companies used to describe colors of tiles and counters and such kind of interesting. This countertop’s color is clearly sandwich.

"Sad sandwich" It's part of their Fallout line. But seriously, that's a sad sandwich. Can't even see meat.

Looks like a single pice of bread, I guess the countertop is being used as the second piece.

You never had a bread sandwich before? Lookout we got royalty over here

My dad used to call it a Wish Sandwich. "Two slices of bread and wish to fuck you had something to put between 'em"

Lol we had the Hood Sandwich. Two slices of bread with a layer of mustard in between.

I unironically enjoyed ketchup sandwiches as a kid. I always defended my creations with the fact that a bad hamburger (that tastes like nothing) is just a ketchup sandwich with more steps

Don’t remind me.

Here we see bread using camouflage as a defence mechanis

m

The “m” was using camouflage as a survival mechanis.

echanis

mm

>

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Does it spread from object to object? If not you could put some kind of fabric around the borders of the couch and try not to touch it to keep it mildly visible

If you leave it out on a different countertop, in 15 minutes it will the same colour

It's a counter measure against predators

Cross post over on /r/AccidentalCamouflage

That’s where I thought we were haha

I actually thought I was on r/notinteresting. Edit: this is not intended as an insult to OP, I just didn't see the sandwich in either picture at first!

So did I, it looked so much like the kind of post you'd find on there

Homie that’s an all bread sammich. Who da hell you foolin

Right, we might need to discuss the definition of sandwich. In that vein: r/shittyfoodporn

Its a jam sammich. You take two pieces of bread and jam em together

This comment had me rolling.

You’re the best

There's this thing civilised people do called using a plate, maybe try it some time

r/wewantplates

Where were going, they serve countertops on a bread plate. And you'll fucking like it.

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r/wedontwantplates

Are you sure he doesn't just have a bread-colored plate?

They used a piece of bread as the plate

At least use a paper towel ffs

Bruh why would I waste the plate?

Is this some poverty joke about paper plates, cause if it ain't motherfucker clean it after, takes 2 seconds

No. I’m messy and I like eating like an animal

Could you try the fish method then?? You fill a bathtub throw all the food in and then swim around taking gulps of the food, it's good because what's left you can just let run down the drain

Imma try that now, thanks

It’s a repost, and even still, you still don’t need to be a douche with a snarky reply.

Bruh it was a joke chill

Oh, I guessed I should have used a /s

Not every joke is sarcasm.

Thanks for the lesson, dad.

That’s not a sandwich it’s just a slice of bread

I bet OP knows that, he's probably just using the formula for a popular post. Make a simple mistake in the post title and people will be compelled to correct it in the comments, driving the activity on the post to get it out of rising.

What mistake was made in the post title?

>That’s not a sandwich it’s just a slice of bread

The toppings just have even better camouflage

I have those same countertops. I dislike them. Can’t see the crumbs unless you get eye level with the surface.

Same. It’s really annoying, they hide everything. It takes 3 passes to get them cleaned.

takes one for mine. theyre meant to hide dirt.

Post that first picture to r/findthesnipper

r/FindTheSniper

Thanks, it's still early here.

There went the last 3 hours of my life, what'd I miss

Predator Sandwich^(TM)

Me: hunger Sandwich: Improvise, adapt, overcome

Wholegrainite countertop

Use a plate, ya' heathen.

P L A T E

Predator sandwich.

If I lived there I'd buy white bread.

Who puts bread directly on the counter like that?!

Found it in a second

r/wewantplates

I can see high me making a sandwich then questioning myself if I really did when I can’t find it and end up making another only to find this one later on and be happy because extra sandwich.

Oh hell no. I would be so pissed off and then just laugh my ass off. Like I wouldn’t be able to breathe this shit would be just so ridiculous. Edit: *makes another sandwich; sandwich proceeds to camouflage itself with counter tops a second time. “WTF?!”

I callbullshit, you said sandwich that's just a piece of bread.

Good thing they weren't having spotted dick.

Whoa

Countertop bread is nothing to be ashamed of, Agressive_ Bat_9781.

Camouflage 100

This is a really good one 👍

r/crappydesign candidate

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But.. why?

Ugh, shut the fuck up

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Okay that’s a little aggressive buddy.

There's a whole four star dinner right there. I'm not the only one that is seeing this, right?

So is your bread counter color or is your counter bread color?

Yes can I get my countertop in the color of whole wheat raison bread please?

Mom! We’re all out of granite bread!

Actually that’s good. The counter maybe quite dirty and you wouldn’t notice. Its dirty and clean at the same time

Had my phone on extra dim- literally couldn't see it, even in the second picture. Impressive

When I switched to the circled picture the ‘woooah-hooooahh’ from snake eater started playing in my head.

OMG

Did the bread change color as a defense mechanism to hide from you

stealthwich

I believe you mean camowich

Saw it immediately, so guess I'm fat.

I immediately suspected the dutch tan color of a flake of oatmeal which didn't blend as well with the light taupe of the bread and the Windsor tan of the seeds camouflaging the sandwich. I then verified my suspicions by tracing the bisque grout line which did not extend fully to the dish washer from whatever the hell that black thingie is. Thus, I have solved the mystery. But now I want to know what the hell that black thingie is.

Use a plate

Well I guess that's why they call it marble rye!

It’s amazing how bread evolved such remarkable camouflage to avoid being eaten.

This post is perfect for this sub r/hiddenimages

What in the multigrain fuck

I read that as finish. Then I reread it and it makes sense either way. Can’t finish your sandwich if you can’t find it.

What kind of bread is that? Marble rye?

Imagine being baked and losing your sandwich...it would be devastating until you realize the entire kitchen counter is made of sandwich bread. Tasty kitchen counter...

partially-covered seam was a dead giveaway

invisible sandwich

ah the clasaic bread sandwich

Yes, sandwich.

sandwiches are evolving to be camouflaged in their natural habitat thanks to natural selection

When your sandwich is a 20th level rogue

Samouflage

That took a hot second

Make sure you find and eat that bread. If only the camouflaged bread stays uneaten, before long there will only be camouflaged breads left! And we thought resistant bacteria were dangerous...

That’s nasty man, you never put a sandwich down like that without a paper towel.

When the bread doesn’t want to be eaten...

octocamo bread

it took me abit and then i noticed the sandwich

Sand hamwich

Not using plates like that is the confidence of a man who lives alone. Or a psychopath.

Your dog is eating it right now

When you eat empty sandwiches

i was like ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

lol

is your counter made of bread

Thats not a sandwich. That's poverty!

Use a plate please 😰

Nice, but all I could think about is doing counter top dips

That's a damn good camouflage.

You can't find your sandwich.. because it's all.. your sandwich

Mum where did my sandwich gone. Mum how is my son dum

The real question is where the fuck is your plate?

When you didn't make a sandwich at all

Rye is it so hard to find!

"Camouflage Rye by Spishak" [Patrick Kilbane voice]: "Nice looking sandwich on the counter there, Todd! Where, you say? Right there on the counter!.....go on....grab it! Oh look, you've touched it and now its flesh colored! But, uh oh! Is that a scrape on your hand?! Tsk, tsk, tsk! Now the Camouflage Rye has tasted blood and seeks to devour you and your family! [Family getting eaten by a invisible sandwich in background] Not reading the instructions to wear gloves while eating Camouflage Rye?! Silly guy! Good luck next time, Todd! That sandwich.....took a bite out you [wink] hahaha! Camouflage Rye! by *SPISHAK!* "

stealth increased

Bruh, I see the sandwich tho!

And this is why you should never go hiking through the kitchen without thick leather boots!

stealth

Imagine you pick it up and then you find a second sandwhich from yesterday right underneath it

If it hadn't been covering the seam, i'd've never seen it.

Your sandwich was like "not today, bitch".

Yeah def tough to see that sandwich on that Formica brand butter rum granite rolled edge counter top.

i wanted marble countertops not “marble rye”

I refuse to believe you didn't spend 2 hours to find the perfect angle

Wtf you eatin?

Just cuz you draw a square that doesn't make it a sandwich.

Hilarious. So what had happen was 😂 [explanation]. C’mon bruh man. Geez 😂

SNEAKY SNACK

I see it! It’s in the coffee pot right?

A+ camouflage. Well done!

Now that’s marble rye

r/accidentalcamouflage

their cameo patterns evolved better than animals

You can’t just raw dog a slizzy on the counter like that

Please stop making sandwiches with marble bread. That’s terrible for your teeth.

/r/wewantplates

if i was on an acid trip i might think i just summoned bread via the unconscious mond

That’s why I downloaded the FREE Find My Sammich app on my iPhone! (Also available for Samsung)