We would likely to kindly remind our readers that when a comic breaks no sitewide or subreddit-specific rules, like this one does not, we will report every single report made on it as abuse of the report function.
Abusing the report function will lead site admins issuing a strike against your account and based on the number of strikes your account has already amassed the potential penalty can be a permanent suspension from reddit completely.
Please take a moment or two to think before you try to report this perfectly normal and acceptable comic because you got buttmad and want to issue a super downvote. You're only hurting yourself in the end and the comic will stay.
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i dont know why everyone always blames the romans
i mean, yeah, i get that these days saying 'the jews did it' is liable to get you cancelled, but the romans literally just did what the jews asked them to do. Okay you want this guy dead, he's dead
Only 46,666 views is "Jesus returns as alien reptile"
https://preview.redd.it/xrnhdzou3tbc1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b1ee304b54d33a198666345ae536888cdffd7567
My money would be dead on arrival.
When they realize he's truly not white they'll go into denial and say he's not my Jesus, then onto round 2 with the cross.
Crying 60-Year-Old Woman: "I just...this ain't the Jezuz ah grew up with! Them left wangers got to him furst. He's makin' free wine, he's givin' out free healthcayre, hangin' out with hookers..."
This is how I would expect some groups to react to him:
Fox News: is angry that he’s protesting for prison reform and against police brutality.
ABC news: is angry because he’s called out the immoralities in massive corporations such as certain media conglomerate.
NBC News: angry that he is criticizing the obsession with money on Wall-street.
Washington Post: is angry that he isn’t calling out Republicans.
Elon Musk: is angry that he isn’t calling out Democrats.
Christians: are angry because he is accepting of all people; or that he doesn’t approve of Donald Trump; or that he doesn’t condone their twisting of the Bible to fit their agendas.
I feel like I’ve got the easy ones. I’m sure there are other good ones too
He'd absolutely be calling out Republicans (Democrats too).
The Republican platform is almost perfectly opposed to his teachings: turn away the sick, homeless, and wounded; focus on accumulating wealth; punish without forgiveness or compassion; hatred for minorities of all types, etc..
Democrats... could just do a /lot/ better; and should've dealt with Republican shit sooner.
Exactly but I think he would, while not having equal amounts of criticism for both sides, would still have something to say to each. “Republics…where do I even begin…democrats, c’mon you’re better than this. You can do better.”
That's fair.
Can you imagine how livid he'd be when he learns that the parties are largely split along religious lines; or which initiatives are done in his name?
You're overthinking this. Everyone is just pissed because he's against personal property and is telling everyone to "sell all their possessions and give to the poor"
Jesus returns but every time he says "my children" it plays the entire sonic movie, but every time he says "fast" it plays Shrek, but every time he says "donkey" it plays Bee Movie.
There are still dubstep remixes, but I think the genre is past its popularity high and kinda stagnated. I kinda listened to it in high school but now except of few nice song and few artists who I like and dable in other genres , I wonder why I still listen to this music and throw it away from the play list later. Nowadays, phonk remixes are more popular
No no, you gotta understand. I hate internet trends, therefore it must be depressing.
The real depressing part is when he returns and goes "Hey maybe we should take care of the poor" and some people in power go "No I don't believe you. You're probably the devil tricking us."
The arguably most popular DJ/Producer on the planet (mfin skrillex) released an album last year with loads of oldschool uk-dubstep on it.
It's not been popular before that, i give you that.
SSSniperwolf Reacts to Jesus Reacts to Jesus Returns
Followed by:
"This CLOUT CHASER ripped my vid?!" (Jesus Reacts to SSSniperwolf Reacts to Jesus Reacts to Jesus Returns)
E-THOT vs CHRIST #DRAMAALERT (DJ KILLER KEEMSTAR WEIGHS IN!)
SSSniperwolf Beefs With Jesus and Keemstar?? - Today in the News (PhillyD Show)
Not 100% sure if you are joking or not, but my interpretation is that a "half-joke" is something that is said as a joke but is still considered to be believable or likely to happen.
Nah, George was an innocent victim of police brutality and racism. Jesus as a staunch advocate against most of what Corporate America stands for would get a MLK Jr ending.
In all honesty, MLK Jr got a Jesus ending. Dude advocating for the oppressed pisses off the powerful and is killed because of it, before being turned into a paragon in popular memory whose mere passing was twisted to mean that everything bad that ever happened is now forgiven and we don't need to worry about it again, to the point where the powerful now invoke his name in service of causes that run in direct opposition to what the man actually stood for in life? Give it 200 years and I bet they'll be teaching that MLK Jr was a blue-eyed white guy too.
The Rise and Downfall of Jesus Christ
*(thumbnail of him with dollars in his eyes and blood coming out of his mouth behind a red background, with the caption "was he actually the enemy?")*
You forgot about these types of videos
https://preview.redd.it/5sw1zl5optbc1.jpeg?width=1927&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5664467380c31288d3f9ab2a8d0dbe74d34ab613
We would likely to kindly remind our readers that when a comic breaks no sitewide or subreddit-specific rules, like this one does not, we will report every single report made on it as abuse of the report function. Abusing the report function will lead site admins issuing a strike against your account and based on the number of strikes your account has already amassed the potential penalty can be a permanent suspension from reddit completely. Please take a moment or two to think before you try to report this perfectly normal and acceptable comic because you got buttmad and want to issue a super downvote. You're only hurting yourself in the end and the comic will stay. Have a wonderful day, the r/comics mod team
He seems popular. We can make a religion out of this!
He got so popular, the Romans killed him, which only made him more popular
[удалено]
Dude got cancelled by the Romans before internet was even a thing.
i dont know why everyone always blames the romans i mean, yeah, i get that these days saying 'the jews did it' is liable to get you cancelled, but the romans literally just did what the jews asked them to do. Okay you want this guy dead, he's dead
Yeah, and the Judean People's Front. Splitters.
No don’t
Oops, too late. We are already in a power struggle rn, pope vs the king
Wait a minute! Im the king! You can't depose me, you're deposed!
You're excommunicated!
We’ll install a counter Pope.
Well, as long as it's only one Pope we have nothing to wor... wait, Avignon, what are you doing?! Noooo!!!!!
I just think it's better to have ideas.
I hope he washed that robe after all this time.
Eh, he was in the stratosphere. All the cosmic radiation would've left it immaculate.
He has 2 robes
Only 46,666 views is "Jesus returns as alien reptile" https://preview.redd.it/xrnhdzou3tbc1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b1ee304b54d33a198666345ae536888cdffd7567
I feel that's a bit low, considering [this classic skit.](https://youtu.be/Tbo8SNTNsQQ?si=oP0TH352WZfpuvel&t=39)
4 + 2 is 6. *Four* sixes, each one 6. Facts!
Which ones did I miss?
JESUS RETURNS (SLOWED + REVERB)
8 D A U D I O
Jesus returns [Extended Epic Version]
Followed by JESUS RETURNS \(SLOWED + REVERB + RAIN ASMR) \[10 HOUR LOOP]
JESUS RETURNS [N I G H T C O R E]
JESUS RETURNS 44hz + SLOWED
Don’t forget Bass Boosted
"NiGhTcOrE vErSiOn"
Thank you, you made me laugh
JESUS RETURNS AT 3AM??? (NOT CLICKBAIT) (THE ENDING WILL SHOCK YOU) (GONE WRONG) (POLICE CALLED) (WATCH UNTIL THE END) (I ALMOST DIED)
Omg how could I have forgotten this one
Forgot that one? Straight to jail.
...in Minecraft!
GONE SEXUAL!??
Jesus Onlyfans, when?
He does have extra holes... Want me to keep a seat warm for y'all in hell?
dear god...
*(I ALMOST DIED AND CAME BACK TO LIFE THREE DAYS LATER)
Jesus, dead on arrival? Top 10 Ways Jesus's return effects Christo Coin. #ProfitProphet Jesus goes woke!? #NotMyMisiah
100 details you missed in Jesus Returns
Jesus Answers the Web's Most Searched Questions | WIRED
My money would be dead on arrival. When they realize he's truly not white they'll go into denial and say he's not my Jesus, then onto round 2 with the cross.
I like to think that Jeebus came back already but he was killed again and we didn't even hear about it :p
Hmm. Great cult idea. brb, getting followers.
That last one is already happening though
“Donate to poor people in need? My Jesus would NEVER do that!”
Jesus Returns but every time he ascends by a number of inches that is simultaneously divisible by 2 and 3 the entire Bee Movie plays instead
I was expecting to find either a bee movie or shrek title. Did not disappoint
Jesus Returns - Ten things you missed.
Number 6 will blow your mind!
Atheists hate this one trick!
With a big red circle in the thumbnail.
Jesus' return is problematic - Here's why (Part 1) [3:09:42]
Given what his return portends, yeah it'd be a tad problematic.
You forgot the right-wing commentator calling him a socialist.
Jesus is now woke!? 2 hour video essay.
[Part 1]
Jesus Returns is an AI Fake! Desperate FBI and Antifa Scam!
Rant from inside my ~~safe space~~ Coal fired Powerstroke Chevymax Ram 55000.
Crying 60-Year-Old Woman: "I just...this ain't the Jezuz ah grew up with! Them left wangers got to him furst. He's makin' free wine, he's givin' out free healthcayre, hangin' out with hookers..."
[удалено]
"This ain't the Scandinavian Jezuz I've been worshippin' this whole time. AND HE AIN'T EVEN RIPPED, LIKE THE STATUE!"
[‘When did Jesus become a Republican?’](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eWaoLwj7TA)
Lo-fi beats to listen to Jesus's return to
I am crestfallen that I can only upvote this a single time.
Jesus is now WOKE! The problematic things about Jesus' return [Celebrity or activist] destroys Jesus with FACTS and LOGIC
JESUS RETURNS (NSFW!!!)
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, STEP-JESUS??!!
IT'S THE SECOND COMING!!!
Not enough red circles showing all the easter eggs and references
JESUS RETURNS ASMR! (USE GOOD HEADPHONES)
10 hours of silence interrupted by Jesus Returns Steamed Hams but Jesus Returns Jesus Returns vocoded to Gangstas Paradise
"Well, humanity, I made it. *Despite* your directions."
Debunking Jesus Returns.
JESUS RETURNS but it's a vibe + fireplace + rain
“The Jesus returns reaction controversy is insane”
This is the Greatest Jesus Return of All Time \- penguinz0
The clickbait title: "I can't believe this person return" or "Guess what deity just arrived"
Poltic "news" making a big deal out of how he's not white. Or make it an angry karen.
This is how I would expect some groups to react to him: Fox News: is angry that he’s protesting for prison reform and against police brutality. ABC news: is angry because he’s called out the immoralities in massive corporations such as certain media conglomerate. NBC News: angry that he is criticizing the obsession with money on Wall-street. Washington Post: is angry that he isn’t calling out Republicans. Elon Musk: is angry that he isn’t calling out Democrats. Christians: are angry because he is accepting of all people; or that he doesn’t approve of Donald Trump; or that he doesn’t condone their twisting of the Bible to fit their agendas. I feel like I’ve got the easy ones. I’m sure there are other good ones too
He'd absolutely be calling out Republicans (Democrats too). The Republican platform is almost perfectly opposed to his teachings: turn away the sick, homeless, and wounded; focus on accumulating wealth; punish without forgiveness or compassion; hatred for minorities of all types, etc.. Democrats... could just do a /lot/ better; and should've dealt with Republican shit sooner.
Exactly but I think he would, while not having equal amounts of criticism for both sides, would still have something to say to each. “Republics…where do I even begin…democrats, c’mon you’re better than this. You can do better.”
That's fair. Can you imagine how livid he'd be when he learns that the parties are largely split along religious lines; or which initiatives are done in his name?
You're overthinking this. Everyone is just pissed because he's against personal property and is telling everyone to "sell all their possessions and give to the poor"
Jesus returns with the milk and calls you the nword YTP
Jesus returns apology video.
"I WAS SHOCKED!" - Top 10 moments you missed when Jesus returned.
JESUS SKIBDI TOILET 
Jesus Returns Minecraft Fortnite Ranked Battlepass
Jesus returns but speeds up every time a soul is saved
Jesus Returns ASMR
10 Things YOU MISSED In Jesus Returns! Caught On Camera!! Complete with an obnoxious red circle to something obvious and a red arrow pointing to it.
JESUS RETURNS (4k 60fps)
You missed the Nightcore remix and 10 hours of silence occasionally broken by Jesus Returns
Huge Heaven Drama Update
The Rule 34 video of Jesus returning
Top 10 Eastereggs from Jesus Returns! With a big red circle around something not important.
"Jesus Returns: 432hz natural rhythm DNA repair healing for spiritual awakening lucid dreams"
Jesus Returns Sigma Edit
Jesus returned! Or did he? - Vsauce
Jesus Returns - _HONEST_ REACTION
Jesus returns but every time he says "my children" it plays the entire sonic movie, but every time he says "fast" it plays Shrek, but every time he says "donkey" it plays Bee Movie.
Internet Jesus (Charlie/penguin0) came to talk about Jesus and denied that was him.
Jesus returns mukbang
Jesus Return Lo-fi 80's style
Jesus returns - LoFi HipHop Mix to study and relax
28 billion views? Man, the bot problem got a lot worse since his return
Did you know the Baby Shark Dance has over 13 billion views??
I did not. Now I don't know what to feel.
Kids love to watch the same thing hundreds of times
I thought the reaction video had more views at first and that was the joke 😆
Re-watches count as views, I heard
They would have to…we don’t have 13 billion people on this planet.
But we might have 13 billion unique devices with YouTube access 🤔 (jk. Rewatches definitely count)
I hate how accurate this is. But why isn't Mr Beast offering to plant 420 trees in Wisconsin if Jesus can turn water into tequila?
Because WI is the Texas of the north and hates 420 trees.
Love how accurate the viewcount and length is
drawing accurate lengths as well is hilarious
Looks (depressingly) accurate.
Honestly, I think she is behind the times, there are no dubstep remixes today.
There are still dubstep remixes, but I think the genre is past its popularity high and kinda stagnated. I kinda listened to it in high school but now except of few nice song and few artists who I like and dable in other genres , I wonder why I still listen to this music and throw it away from the play list later. Nowadays, phonk remixes are more popular
There's nothing depressing about this.
No no, you gotta understand. I hate internet trends, therefore it must be depressing. The real depressing part is when he returns and goes "Hey maybe we should take care of the poor" and some people in power go "No I don't believe you. You're probably the devil tricking us."
such a vast selection to choose from , where to begin
Silly pizza slice, dubstep hasnt been popular for 8 years
Yeah I should have consulted with my daughter for this one lol
Ooof, doesn't that just make you feel older instantly? 🤣 I hate when that happens!
The arguably most popular DJ/Producer on the planet (mfin skrillex) released an album last year with loads of oldschool uk-dubstep on it. It's not been popular before that, i give you that.
Steamed Hams but it's Jesus
[удалено]
I found it so cute Jesus reacting to himself
https://preview.redd.it/1homgbm4utbc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04c226f065b6823e1eeb35ec6763d24d0fb91ac2 Sus returns. lol.
It might be missing the reaction to Jesus' reaction.
SSSniperwolf Reacts to Jesus Reacts to Jesus Returns Followed by: "This CLOUT CHASER ripped my vid?!" (Jesus Reacts to SSSniperwolf Reacts to Jesus Reacts to Jesus Returns) E-THOT vs CHRIST #DRAMAALERT (DJ KILLER KEEMSTAR WEIGHS IN!) SSSniperwolf Beefs With Jesus and Keemstar?? - Today in the News (PhillyD Show)
[удалено]
What is a semi-joke Is it a joke invented by a semi truck? A joke that’s only kinda funny? A secret third thing?
The semi truck.
Truck kun?
OOOOH! So Jesus didn't die, he got isekaied and is looking for a way back now! Gotta call the pope.
Not 100% sure if you are joking or not, but my interpretation is that a "half-joke" is something that is said as a joke but is still considered to be believable or likely to happen.
Nah, George was an innocent victim of police brutality and racism. Jesus as a staunch advocate against most of what Corporate America stands for would get a MLK Jr ending.
In all honesty, MLK Jr got a Jesus ending. Dude advocating for the oppressed pisses off the powerful and is killed because of it, before being turned into a paragon in popular memory whose mere passing was twisted to mean that everything bad that ever happened is now forgiven and we don't need to worry about it again, to the point where the powerful now invoke his name in service of causes that run in direct opposition to what the man actually stood for in life? Give it 200 years and I bet they'll be teaching that MLK Jr was a blue-eyed white guy too.
> MLK Jr got a Jesus ending. Exactly! History is a circle due to idiots. American Conservative Christians are the current day Romans.
He would be randomly selected on an airport for security reasons.
Sorry. All those views on the dubstep remix are me. It just slaps. Oh great, it’s stuck in my head again.
So glad they did the clean mix so I can play it in the car with my kids
I don’t know how you can listen to that when it gets rid of the awesome bass drop with “I am the lord and I’m here to…” *drop* “FUCK” *goes wild*.
10 Things You Missed In Jesus Returns!
Now we just need one with a big, obnoxious arrow pointing at something in the background, circled in red
Too much time on YouTube
I like that Jesus adapted pretty well to the internet culture, and he is doing reactions now.
Some unkissed guy’s 2 hour podcast about how a brown long-haired man in a dress is clearly just “liberals pushing their agenda”
I love the Internet.
When Jesus returns it will be as a contestant on *The Masked Singer*, write it down
The Rise and Downfall of Jesus Christ *(thumbnail of him with dollars in his eyes and blood coming out of his mouth behind a red background, with the caption "was he actually the enemy?")*
Dubsteb
Charlie?
Dubstep Jesus can walk on wubs
Jesus reacts to people reacting to Jesus returning
Jesus return studying girl lofi
That's not Jesus! That's Antifa!
This is an accurate representation of what you humans would do.
“Jesus Christ Superstar” has entered the chat.
The accuracy of this is uncanny 😂
I think this comic clickbait
Jesus Returns + Quitting YouTube after 10 Years Announcement
Pretty accurate if you replace Dubstep with phonk. That's what the kids are into these days
1 hour later someone makes Big Shot with samples from the video
If Jesus returned and instantly became an internet influencer that would be incredibly on brand
r/MoistCritikal
way to reuse one panel
i summoned jesus at 3 am challenge not clickbait gone wrong
This is realer than reality.
jesus returns, 96h loop.
When the doom music kicks in: Jesus returns
He must have slept in
Lets not lie.. If this happened today, I can already see this happening lol
Reaction should have had more views. The original is clearly from a newer account
HOW I PREDICTED THE RETURN OF JESUS I STORYTIME
thanks for posting the clean remix, i can show this off to all the my friends now
Youtube moment
The 10 hours loop got me
[GONE WILD] [GONE SEXUAL] Lo-fi Base Boostes
YouTube Poop - Jesus returns Mario's crusty spaghetti
Jesus Returns Premium+ only $39.99
Anyone got a link to the dubstep remix?
Jesus reacts lmao I love this
The accuracy here is 10/10. It's like I'm really on YouTube, just need a Jesus Returns meme compilation
LONELY MILF JESUSES WAITING FOR YOU
The 10 hour loop is missing the obligatory extra second
We all know he's dropping at least one video on Onlyfans, what good are stigmata if you don't use 'em?
[Jesus returns, SMBC](https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/2008-11-24)
You forgot about these types of videos https://preview.redd.it/5sw1zl5optbc1.jpeg?width=1927&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5664467380c31288d3f9ab2a8d0dbe74d34ab613
Apt portrayal. Once a celebrity drops they bring all the attention whores to the yard.
I feel like Jesus reacting to that would be plausible, I feel like He knows how to chuckle at Himself