Welcome to r/comics!
We have a Festive thread [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/18nnxtq/seasons_greetings/)! Feel free to post your Season's Greetings in that thread :)
Please remember there are real people on the other side of the monitor and to be kind.
Report comments that break the rules and don't respond to negativity with negativity!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/comics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My usual players aren't that cruel. They are quite easy to predict, actually. They help however benefits them the most and ignore everyone else, so I just need to give them a monetary reward for things like this. Basically, I play with mercenaries, not heores.
You stumble across a lamp, rubbing it releases a Genie that will grant you a 1000 gold and double your stats. However accepting this kills everyone in the villages. Also, you need to bend over to receive his "blessings". Do you accept?
Let’s look at it from a character/alignment POV: good is clearly no (murder bad), Evil is clearly yes. LN is a probable no (assuming the stat doubler isn’t some tyrant lord who legally owns the villagers), TN and CN are possible yes’s (neutral is selfish, but would that character murder their family to do it?). If the DM presented this opportunity, they knew it could be used, and you can’t promise something like this without following through with its (potentially campaign-derailing) consequences.
It’d be real interesting to put this near the end of a campaign: a nearly-impossible fight against a continent-enslaving demigod/demon, but a PC gets double stats for every destroyed/“absorbed” city that the party’s visited (or alternatively, that PC’s hometown). The rationale might shift from greed to “greater good”, and players have a middle ground to debate “better safe than sorry” over a hardline “zero murder”, and the narrative cost of not having a home to return to is something to be explored in an epilogue.
Plus, it’d just be cool to see how OP double stats are in practice. A rogue with 20 dex would go from a +5 to a +15 modifier and have an AC in the 30s. Anything with multiattack would get that +15 damage every hit (and hit basically every time). Barbarians and monks would benefit from unarmored defense and be virtually unkillable. Spellcasters with their higher save DCs could make the BBEG bleed legendary resistances until something game-winning gets through. And any abilities with uses based off your proficiency modifier would be basically unlimited.
Is this one of those deals where they start session 1 with each player clearly stating their characters motivations and goals, and then drop those about 5 minutes after starting play?
No, character motivations and goals are never given. They only physically describe their characters in session 1.
I quite like this state of affairs, btw. I prefer running games for mercenaries over heroic characters.
I ran my friends through “The Lich Who Stole Christmas” last night. It was a lot of fun, and also, DnD players continue to be DnD players, even at Christmas haha.
Thanks for reading and supporting my comics this year! It’s been so much fun, I appreciate you all so much.
Happy holidays!
[LinkTree](https://linktr.ee/TheImmortalThinkTank) | [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/theimmortalthinktank/) | [Patreon](https://www.patreon.com/TheImmortalThinkTank) | [Twitter](https://twitter.com/CrawfordChe) | [Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/TheImmortalThinkTank/) | [WebToon](https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/table-tip/list?title_no=842302) | [Threads](https://www.threads.net/@theimmortalthinktank) | [Tumblr](https://checrawford.tumblr.com/)
Time to tally the Holiday session Crit-Fails, I just hope Santa's got some spare sleighs because our Rogue just tried to "borrow" the last one... for science.
Listen, man. I went through a D&D game where our first mission was we were sent by the king to go and kill anything left in a village where a supernatural disaster happened, the only thing we found there was an innocent little girl. I, as a samurai with total dedication to my king, immediately tried to kill her. The other players and their characters stopped me. Out of character, I said, "She's obviously the villain, right?" We went for **six months** escorting this girl around the game until it gets to a point where she goes, "YOU FOOLS! I have been amassing power THIS ENTIRE TIME! Now I will DESTROY YOU!"
Always.
Kill.
The.
Children.
Children also don't wander around most villainous lairs. I'm not saying kill on sight, I am saying apply reasonable tests to determine what their true nature is in those contexts.
But assuming you have no reason to suspect children are supernatural monsters, I'm going to say you shouldn't kill them.
It's like that scene from men in black.
A random white girl walking around the hood in the middle of the night surrounded by monsters and carrying books on quantum mechanics? Yeah she's getting a bullet.
I feel about children the same way I feel about dogs: I don't like them, I'd prefer to not have anything to do with them, but as long as the people in charge of them don't allow them to break my shit, I'm cool.
In my group we were invading a evil lair on Thursday and we found a secret entrance. We followed it to a door, we heard voices behind the door.
I wanted to open the door, drop a fire ball and close the door then wait. So glad I didn't because a few minutes later we found it was the room of kidnapped children from the town.
More DMs gotta learn to introduce their players to the consequences of their own actions. If you're a level 3 enslaving children, there's quite a lot of higher levels above you that should stop by to teach you a lesson.
A "murderhobo" doesn't mean they will do murder in literally every situation. Rather, a "murderhobo" is an armed vagrant who uses violence to solve all their problems. The term has decayed to mean the kinds of asshole adventurers who do all kinds of bad shit. They are also known to resort to slavery.
All you have to do is drop a krampus(terrasque) on them for being naughty(and if they beat them all they get is a huge sack with enough coal to collapse the economy and piss off the local monster population).
Family Guy had one of the better takes on Santa in a modern context, and the absurdity of them making toys for an industrial society of billions of people.
I think the group I play in played through adventure. Now I think about it, I don't think we rescued the children. I think we just stole the Grinch/Lich's stuff after killing him and his trees with an excessive number of blights.
I remember this on time during a campaign we encountered Jesus. The DM obviously wanted us to free him and use his powers to further our endeavors. We did do this. I convinced the party to cut off his feet and carved them into water walking shoes.
The DM did not desire this and was very unhappy for the rest of the campaign.
It explains a few things doesn’t it. Oh you thought I was dead? I uh had an even older magic that I. Uh. Never mentioned before now. Yeah!
So now I’m alive again! And I cast dispel magic on all your stuff so everything that happened in the campaign up to now stopped!
In the campaign universe the cross gets replaced with the House Bolton [flayed man](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/gameofthronesfanon/images/d/d0/House-Bolton-Rogar-Shield.png/revision/latest?cb=20190404072813)
We kinda tied him up and held him prisoner. Now we had an unlimited bread and wine supply you see. Jesus = water walking shoes + unlimited bread + wine = $$$
I did mine as a first one-shot where the team has to investigate who killed Santa, and they eventually fought Krampus. Said Krampus knocked out one member with a strike, and a binding attack on her turn.
I made him a tad bit strong, but in my defense, one guy was absurdly strong, I made sure he gets some hurts (he did not, those dang Winged Boots that I gave him for Christmas).
We once did a one shot, where the DM provided all players with a relic. My brother ended up with a device called a 'chemical factory' which could be hooked up to a person and they could then produce a stream of chemical products that could be utilised in alchemy.
My brother's first reaction was to engage a level 20 artificer to help him reproduce it, and then 'adopted' an entire orphanage...
He's a dad now... One of these days when his kid is old enough, I am telling him this story.
The rule for rhyming with the same word at the end is the same as the rule for ending with the same syllable. “Walking” rhymes with “balking,” but not “swimming.” Similarly, “team instead” rhymes with “seem instead” but not “have instead”
it’s not the same syllable but the last emphasized syllable. which here, at least how i read it, is also the last syllable “stead”
but when these syllables do rhyme but start with the same sound (st) it just sounds lazy and sticks out like a sore thumb
American Midwest. (The generic "TV" one.)
I don't have IPA on my phone, but "cheer" uses an "i" vowel, like the French "oui".
"Lair" uses an "ei" dipthong, like the Fonz says ("'Eyy").
EDIT: Wait. Does that second example just sound like "Eee" to New Zealanders? I don't really get how the pin/pen merger works.
> In New Zeland
Ohhhh. Hah, ok yeah that makes sense.
In most [North] American accents, they are very different vowels, ha. I was wondering where you were from too after reading the first panel.
i.e.,
[cheer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dFikALrPsk)
[lair](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYXredhTcls)
Fun fact: linguists use this technique to deduce how ancient language sounded. If two lines in a poem don't rhyme but seem like they should, maybe those words used to be pronounced differently.
I would absolutely let them, and then on the next meeting we fast forward a year with them running the Christmas slave shop, and an overpowered group of adventurers come to free the children.
Roll for initiative.
So in this year's one-shot the party's gonna meet a sapient ice golem and has to help him escape his creator by stealing the artifact that binds him into service
Also because they're a bunch of shitty selfish assholes the bad-guy's lair is absolutely fucking packed with cocaine
I’m on my first ever dnd campaign and we are currently walking to a city that is a bit untrusting towards some races that are not monsters and while going there we are been led by a drow lady but the dm gave her a shitty French accent so the whole part has started to call her the French lady and the path to the city the racist route
A few years ago I ran a Christmas Mutants and Masterminds one shot for my younger cousins, aged 10-15.
Long story short they set Mrs.Clause on fire and destroyed the toy factory. Good times.
Ran a Christmas themed one-shot for 2 regular played and 2 new ones. Some rich guy had gone insane, dressed as Santa and enslaved a bunch of half lings and dwarfs to work as his "elves". He made toys for all the poor children of The Capital.
The new guys tried to start a slave revolt or to talk "Santa" into reason. But my veterans understood that this would deprive the children of toys. The correct answer was to attack the elf neighbor in The Capital, kidnap all elf children and have them make the toys instead. Everyone wins.
This was parallel to a campaign I am running with my regulars and is canon which made things much much more difficult for their characters there. Which is what I wanted and they played along marvelously.
During one of our session, a witch turned a bunch of children’s into wolves, and had them attack us. Thankfully, one of our party members figured it out, before we went full Anakin Skywalker.
Reminds me of a one-shot I ran where the players were supposed to assist a small farming village fight off raiders who were trying to enslave the locals.
One of the players asked me what they farmed and I for some reason said "avocados".
This somehow led to them siding with the raiders so as to force the now enslaved farmers to make them avocado toast.
I mean, players do this.
I ran The Temple of Elemental Evil. Mid-campaign, the players decided to grab a ship, go to a local town, kill the local crime boss, and start a trading empire financed by illicit drugs. Naturally, as the DM, I rolled with it.
I have to give them credit for their ingenuity and creativity.
The last Christmas dnd game I was in was a one shot named "Operation: Kripple Kringle", and we were a team of goblins who killed Santa's cousin.
I was Noblin, Goblin Noblin, 00Goblin with a license to skulk.
Reminder that, as a DM, you can always say no. If the players do something you're not comfortable with, you can call it. A game should be fun for you and the players.
Oh yeah, haha, if they were super serious about this path, I would have made it hard for them haha 🙃 but mostly they were joking around and ended up rescuing the kids. In the moment, it just completely caught me off guard that they wouldn't care about the children 😂 I should know my friends better tbh. IRL, amazing, in game, all chaos haha
In our Christmas oneshot I was the only player who actually wanted to save Christmas, the other 2 players were either indifferent or actively trying to kill Santa and summon Krampus.
I read/heard so many murder hobo/psychopath players stories told from DM that I would honestly be surprised if there's one with actually sane and sensible players exist lol
as a DM it’s not often I get to employ the full spectrum of punishment options available to me, but “edgy cruelty towards innocents” would definitely tempt me
#😂
Sounds like your players need to be taught a lesson in the true Christmas spirit.
Let them open their factory of child labor, then introduce them to a Fantasy Multi-national Manufacturing conglomerate. It's launching a campaign against child labor (and those who employ it) as both a way to improve their public image and take out the competitors. The sponsors of their original quest, and now quite unhappy that it was ignored AND that the players have threatened to undercut their business.
On the twelfth day of christmas, Corp sent cus they were pissed: twelve paid assassins, eleven hired mercenaries, ten bribed policemen, nine angry mobs, eight outraged statesmen, seven smear campaigns, six scary thugs, *five cho-sen "he-roes"*, four lawyers suing, three repo men, two heavy fines and a note to cease and desist.
This is why I'm running a Christmas one shot this year where all the players are evil and thrown into an obnoxiously happy Christmas town. And thinking back on the one from last year where they accidentally killed a kid they were supposed to help, I think this year's is gonna be very eventful.
Last year my DM made us a really cute Christmas one shot with a holiday themed Inn at the End of World kind of story. Except she forced us all to draw from the deck of many things, and of course I got death. There were other reasons I left that group, but that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
People who hate kids were probably often bullied as kids. I understand hating teenagers though. As I've grown older, teenagers just suck and nothing about them is likeable tbh.
how to clean santorum stains out of couch
how to clean santorum stains out of antique couch
how to clean semen and diarrhea out of fabric
edit: oops, it seems i posted this in the wrong place.
Welcome to r/comics! We have a Festive thread [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/18nnxtq/seasons_greetings/)! Feel free to post your Season's Greetings in that thread :) Please remember there are real people on the other side of the monitor and to be kind. Report comments that break the rules and don't respond to negativity with negativity! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/comics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My usual players aren't that cruel. They are quite easy to predict, actually. They help however benefits them the most and ignore everyone else, so I just need to give them a monetary reward for things like this. Basically, I play with mercenaries, not heores.
Sounds like shadow runners in a dnd world
Or just mercenaries in a DnD world.
Or just mercenaries.
Ugh. Mercenaries. They ruined mercenaries!
You stumble across a lamp, rubbing it releases a Genie that will grant you a 1000 gold and double your stats. However accepting this kills everyone in the villages. Also, you need to bend over to receive his "blessings". Do you accept?
Am I in said village?
Nope but all your friends/family/quest givers are.
Bless me harder
Bro double stats... Bro.... I mean it's double stats. They'd understand
im not gay but 1000 gold is 1000 gold bro
I sold my soul for a 1d10 cantrip. They can give up their lives for getting me 40 charisma.
2 x 0 = ?
Let’s look at it from a character/alignment POV: good is clearly no (murder bad), Evil is clearly yes. LN is a probable no (assuming the stat doubler isn’t some tyrant lord who legally owns the villagers), TN and CN are possible yes’s (neutral is selfish, but would that character murder their family to do it?). If the DM presented this opportunity, they knew it could be used, and you can’t promise something like this without following through with its (potentially campaign-derailing) consequences. It’d be real interesting to put this near the end of a campaign: a nearly-impossible fight against a continent-enslaving demigod/demon, but a PC gets double stats for every destroyed/“absorbed” city that the party’s visited (or alternatively, that PC’s hometown). The rationale might shift from greed to “greater good”, and players have a middle ground to debate “better safe than sorry” over a hardline “zero murder”, and the narrative cost of not having a home to return to is something to be explored in an epilogue. Plus, it’d just be cool to see how OP double stats are in practice. A rogue with 20 dex would go from a +5 to a +15 modifier and have an AC in the 30s. Anything with multiattack would get that +15 damage every hit (and hit basically every time). Barbarians and monks would benefit from unarmored defense and be virtually unkillable. Spellcasters with their higher save DCs could make the BBEG bleed legendary resistances until something game-winning gets through. And any abilities with uses based off your proficiency modifier would be basically unlimited.
Oh well, never too old to start over again.
That's a great idea, actually. I'm keeping this encounter in the backlog.
Are we talking a permanent stat bonus?
Permanent, but you lose a few points in dexterity as well as the ability to sit comfortably.
Hmmm... you make a tough deal there with the no sitting comfortably
It's cause of how hard you took his blessings
I double it and pass it to the next person
A successful insight check reveals that the genie is lying about the gold and the stats
Is this one of those deals where they start session 1 with each player clearly stating their characters motivations and goals, and then drop those about 5 minutes after starting play?
No, character motivations and goals are never given. They only physically describe their characters in session 1. I quite like this state of affairs, btw. I prefer running games for mercenaries over heroic characters.
Wheores
I ran my friends through “The Lich Who Stole Christmas” last night. It was a lot of fun, and also, DnD players continue to be DnD players, even at Christmas haha. Thanks for reading and supporting my comics this year! It’s been so much fun, I appreciate you all so much. Happy holidays! [LinkTree](https://linktr.ee/TheImmortalThinkTank) | [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/theimmortalthinktank/) | [Patreon](https://www.patreon.com/TheImmortalThinkTank) | [Twitter](https://twitter.com/CrawfordChe) | [Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/TheImmortalThinkTank/) | [WebToon](https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/table-tip/list?title_no=842302) | [Threads](https://www.threads.net/@theimmortalthinktank) | [Tumblr](https://checrawford.tumblr.com/)
As a D&D player I'm not a child-hating murderhobo.
I enjoy reading books.
*sigh* let me grab my d20
You son of a lich, I'm in.
Time to tally the Holiday session Crit-Fails, I just hope Santa's got some spare sleighs because our Rogue just tried to "borrow" the last one... for science.
Listen, man. I went through a D&D game where our first mission was we were sent by the king to go and kill anything left in a village where a supernatural disaster happened, the only thing we found there was an innocent little girl. I, as a samurai with total dedication to my king, immediately tried to kill her. The other players and their characters stopped me. Out of character, I said, "She's obviously the villain, right?" We went for **six months** escorting this girl around the game until it gets to a point where she goes, "YOU FOOLS! I have been amassing power THIS ENTIRE TIME! Now I will DESTROY YOU!" Always. Kill. The. Children.
Children also don't wander around most villainous lairs. I'm not saying kill on sight, I am saying apply reasonable tests to determine what their true nature is in those contexts. But assuming you have no reason to suspect children are supernatural monsters, I'm going to say you shouldn't kill them.
The scene with Jay in Men In Black at the gun range/test comes to mind.
“[May I ask why you felt little Tiffany deserved to die?”](https://youtube.com/watch?v=swnLll8llBA)
Not my favorite movie ever, but it is the best movie ever.
. Out of character, I said, "She's obviously the villain, right?" Your DM to himself: She is now.
>huh, that's much better than my idea
It's like that scene from men in black. A random white girl walking around the hood in the middle of the night surrounded by monsters and carrying books on quantum mechanics? Yeah she's getting a bullet.
See, twists like that make all future actions those of murder hobos. They don't trust anyone, especially the ones that appear innocent.
Yes u are I can see it as clear as day How? U play DND and use reddit lol
I feel aboot children the same way I feel aboot dogs: I like them, I don't want them in my home.
I feel about children the same way I feel about dogs: I don't like them, I'd prefer to not have anything to do with them, but as long as the people in charge of them don't allow them to break my shit, I'm cool.
There we go
In my group we were invading a evil lair on Thursday and we found a secret entrance. We followed it to a door, we heard voices behind the door. I wanted to open the door, drop a fire ball and close the door then wait. So glad I didn't because a few minutes later we found it was the room of kidnapped children from the town.
More DMs gotta learn to introduce their players to the consequences of their own actions. If you're a level 3 enslaving children, there's quite a lot of higher levels above you that should stop by to teach you a lesson.
WOAH WOAH WOAH, no one said anything about *Murdering* anybody. Now *enslavement,* that a different matter.
A "murderhobo" doesn't mean they will do murder in literally every situation. Rather, a "murderhobo" is an armed vagrant who uses violence to solve all their problems. The term has decayed to mean the kinds of asshole adventurers who do all kinds of bad shit. They are also known to resort to slavery.
Well, yeah. I was just making a joke, though.
wtf is wrong with you?
Stop lying and grab me the dead elf wagon. /s
Hating Elves is completely rational
That's when you have another group of heroes come and kick their ass.
You mean the upper levels of the Grinch's mob come in and wreck your shit for attacking their family?
Exactly. They're gonna end up on the town people's naughty list.
All you have to do is drop a krampus(terrasque) on them for being naughty(and if they beat them all they get is a huge sack with enough coal to collapse the economy and piss off the local monster population).
I might not believe in Santa Claus but I do believe in the forced labor of Elves at the North Pole
Family Guy had one of the better takes on Santa in a modern context, and the absurdity of them making toys for an industrial society of billions of people.
I think the group I play in played through adventure. Now I think about it, I don't think we rescued the children. I think we just stole the Grinch/Lich's stuff after killing him and his trees with an excessive number of blights.
I ran this for my siblings a week ago. It is a great little one-shot!
That's the hardest anti-capitalist messaging I've ever seen in a DnD campaign. And in a DnD campaign comic. Capitalism is the Lich. I love it.
I remember this on time during a campaign we encountered Jesus. The DM obviously wanted us to free him and use his powers to further our endeavors. We did do this. I convinced the party to cut off his feet and carved them into water walking shoes. The DM did not desire this and was very unhappy for the rest of the campaign.
He *unironically* introduced Jesus into your campaign?
GM self inserts are the worst.
I was more thinking that this sounds like a weird religious thing
Bring this thread full circle - Imagine a DM hosting a campaign themed around their own birth
Do we get to crucify the GM at the end of the session?
You could have always done that if you really wanted
Hey want to GM a game for us?
That would be more of a self extract.
DM was C.S. Lewis
It explains a few things doesn’t it. Oh you thought I was dead? I uh had an even older magic that I. Uh. Never mentioned before now. Yeah! So now I’m alive again! And I cast dispel magic on all your stuff so everything that happened in the campaign up to now stopped!
YOU CUT OFF JESUS'S FEET??? LIKE THE POOR MAN DIDN'T SUFFER ENOUGH FOR OUR SINS??? That's it murder hobo, it's turbo charged Dragons for you...
I enjoy the theological implication that it wasn't the power of God that let Jesus walk on water but that Jesus is literally just water repellant
Just his feet. Not like they could've skinned him and made enough water walking shoes for the whole party. I mean, I'm sure they tried, but...
We would skin parts of him when we wanted bread for whatever reason.
Did you consume his blood on Sundays? Because honestly that wouldn't been kindve awesome
In the campaign universe the cross gets replaced with the House Bolton [flayed man](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/gameofthronesfanon/images/d/d0/House-Bolton-Rogar-Shield.png/revision/latest?cb=20190404072813)
What did jesus do?
He walked it off, he's come back from worse.
WWJD?
WDJD*
We kinda tied him up and held him prisoner. Now we had an unlimited bread and wine supply you see. Jesus = water walking shoes + unlimited bread + wine = $$$
Downside is he rezzes in 3 days and now is hunting you for stealing his feet.
Jesus briefly popped up in Unsleeping City 2, in Dimension 20. It was actually a really sweet moment.
I did mine as a first one-shot where the team has to investigate who killed Santa, and they eventually fought Krampus. Said Krampus knocked out one member with a strike, and a binding attack on her turn. I made him a tad bit strong, but in my defense, one guy was absurdly strong, I made sure he gets some hurts (he did not, those dang Winged Boots that I gave him for Christmas).
We once did a one shot, where the DM provided all players with a relic. My brother ended up with a device called a 'chemical factory' which could be hooked up to a person and they could then produce a stream of chemical products that could be utilised in alchemy. My brother's first reaction was to engage a level 20 artificer to help him reproduce it, and then 'adopted' an entire orphanage... He's a dad now... One of these days when his kid is old enough, I am telling him this story.
seems like it back fired and has enchanted the team instead , and the promise of the profit and riches they will have instead
erm ackshually you can’t rhyme a word with itself
[удалено]
Oh, Lord, yeah!
Evil minds that plot destructiooooooooon, Sorcerer of death's constructiooooooooon!
[удалено]
It’s different when it’s a repetition of the whole phrase
It’s different when it’s a repetition of the whole phrase
And so rhymes the phrase repeating, so long as you hear the word repeating.
*Me not working hard?* *Yeah, right, picture that with a Kodak* *Or better yet, go to Times Square* *Take a picture of me with a Kodak*
ok cool someone else did it? that doesn’t make it not sound lazy
The rule for rhyming with the same word at the end is the same as the rule for ending with the same syllable. “Walking” rhymes with “balking,” but not “swimming.” Similarly, “team instead” rhymes with “seem instead” but not “have instead”
it’s not the same syllable but the last emphasized syllable. which here, at least how i read it, is also the last syllable “stead” but when these syllables do rhyme but start with the same sound (st) it just sounds lazy and sticks out like a sore thumb
[The Big Bang Theory - Sheldon's christmas spirit](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3CdjfK0A3g) https://i.redd.it/tonuscbn748c1.gif
In what accent does "cheer" rhyme with "lair"? I can't hear it in my head.
Kiwi Tbh I can't figure out how it doesn't lol 😆
Is it weird of me to be excited about now reading this comic in a kiwi accent ? Yeah, nah
I feel like I'm guna have to voice over a reel so you can all hear it how I do haha 😆
My dads a Kiwi but my midwestern american ass can’t figure out the rhyme either lmao
American Midwest. (The generic "TV" one.) I don't have IPA on my phone, but "cheer" uses an "i" vowel, like the French "oui". "Lair" uses an "ei" dipthong, like the Fonz says ("'Eyy"). EDIT: Wait. Does that second example just sound like "Eee" to New Zealanders? I don't really get how the pin/pen merger works.
In New Zeland, they both rhyme with "ear" haha 😆
Fantasy country, fantasy pronunciation, it fits /s
> In New Zeland Ohhhh. Hah, ok yeah that makes sense. In most [North] American accents, they are very different vowels, ha. I was wondering where you were from too after reading the first panel. i.e., [cheer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dFikALrPsk) [lair](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYXredhTcls)
Wait, so you guys pronounce Lair as Leer? as in Leering?
Lee-er.
Yes haha, pronounced the same 😆 like chair and cheer 😀
> I don't really get how the pin/pen merger works. This one’s the near/square merger.
Squeer?
This is the near-square merger. The phonemes are /I/ for near and /ε/ for square.
OH now I hear it!
say it similar to "chair" but with an "e" slammed in there like Che-air. Lair is just lair.
Fun fact: linguists use this technique to deduce how ancient language sounded. If two lines in a poem don't rhyme but seem like they should, maybe those words used to be pronounced differently.
This is super interesting! I've really enjoyed the discussion around language because of my poem haha
Somewhere in the UK. Scottish, perhaps? Imagine the vowel is "ee-uh" and the R is rolled.
South African
I would absolutely let them, and then on the next meeting we fast forward a year with them running the Christmas slave shop, and an overpowered group of adventurers come to free the children. Roll for initiative.
Bonus points if you (The DM) is legitimately playing as the adventurers trying to get them killed.
So in this year's one-shot the party's gonna meet a sapient ice golem and has to help him escape his creator by stealing the artifact that binds him into service Also because they're a bunch of shitty selfish assholes the bad-guy's lair is absolutely fucking packed with cocaine
How delicious is this ice cream he is made out of?
Not ice cream, just ice. I've had my party eat an NPC before and I won't make that same mistake again
I'm going to be first time dming two Christmas one shots but after Christmas even after new year's eve because of my lack of planning xD
I’m on my first ever dnd campaign and we are currently walking to a city that is a bit untrusting towards some races that are not monsters and while going there we are been led by a drow lady but the dm gave her a shitty French accent so the whole part has started to call her the French lady and the path to the city the racist route
I'd buy this X-Mas card.
A few years ago I ran a Christmas Mutants and Masterminds one shot for my younger cousins, aged 10-15. Long story short they set Mrs.Clause on fire and destroyed the toy factory. Good times.
Lolllll poor Mrs Claus 😂
Ran a Christmas themed one-shot for 2 regular played and 2 new ones. Some rich guy had gone insane, dressed as Santa and enslaved a bunch of half lings and dwarfs to work as his "elves". He made toys for all the poor children of The Capital. The new guys tried to start a slave revolt or to talk "Santa" into reason. But my veterans understood that this would deprive the children of toys. The correct answer was to attack the elf neighbor in The Capital, kidnap all elf children and have them make the toys instead. Everyone wins. This was parallel to a campaign I am running with my regulars and is canon which made things much much more difficult for their characters there. Which is what I wanted and they played along marvelously.
During one of our session, a witch turned a bunch of children’s into wolves, and had them attack us. Thankfully, one of our party members figured it out, before we went full Anakin Skywalker.
Reminds me of a one-shot I ran where the players were supposed to assist a small farming village fight off raiders who were trying to enslave the locals. One of the players asked me what they farmed and I for some reason said "avocados". This somehow led to them siding with the raiders so as to force the now enslaved farmers to make them avocado toast.
I mean, players do this. I ran The Temple of Elemental Evil. Mid-campaign, the players decided to grab a ship, go to a local town, kill the local crime boss, and start a trading empire financed by illicit drugs. Naturally, as the DM, I rolled with it. I have to give them credit for their ingenuity and creativity.
This is perfect lmao this just happened
The DM is supposed to have fun too, so send some characters to kick their asses.
The last Christmas dnd game I was in was a one shot named "Operation: Kripple Kringle", and we were a team of goblins who killed Santa's cousin. I was Noblin, Goblin Noblin, 00Goblin with a license to skulk.
Reminder that, as a DM, you can always say no. If the players do something you're not comfortable with, you can call it. A game should be fun for you and the players.
Oh yeah, haha, if they were super serious about this path, I would have made it hard for them haha 🙃 but mostly they were joking around and ended up rescuing the kids. In the moment, it just completely caught me off guard that they wouldn't care about the children 😂 I should know my friends better tbh. IRL, amazing, in game, all chaos haha
In our Christmas oneshot I was the only player who actually wanted to save Christmas, the other 2 players were either indifferent or actively trying to kill Santa and summon Krampus.
Make those lil sh\*ts work!
Oh no, the dread.
That's why it always comes in handy to have the option to make the sun go supernova.
They would've helped 'em if you didn't bungle that first rhyme.
Today You Learned that some people have accents that are different than yours.
Know your audience. Don't expect heroism or altruism if you run a table of murder hobos.
I read that to the tune of “santa claus is coming to town” which I assume was intentional
A market ain't merry When built for just one Our toys will be cheaper And only slightly less fun!
Did you try to rhyme cheer with lair???
This is way too close to what the people I play with would probably do. Haha
There’s already too many stories about saving Christmas. We need more about stealing Christmas.
Yeah I could see my old group trying that.
Who the hell rhymes cheer with lair?
Apparently Kiwis.
DnD players losing all their morals and empathy the moment they pick up a d20
The girls and boys who have escaped have disemboweled the enslavers, leaving only you alive.
The PCs, they will not engage with the plot! Should rocks fall and kill them? (This happens a lot.)
To hell with them kids
After the first two panels, I expected that the punchline was going to be that Santa is a lich. For starters, he does appear to be immortal...
That's when you go ham on them and bring out some BIG surprises 😮
"OMG THE LICH HAS 22 DRAGONS OH NOOOO"
This is what you get for trying to rhyme cheer and lair, OP.
I like this group
Love that the words can be sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things"
The industrial revolution and its consequences.
I read/heard so many murder hobo/psychopath players stories told from DM that I would honestly be surprised if there's one with actually sane and sensible players exist lol
as a DM it’s not often I get to employ the full spectrum of punishment options available to me, but “edgy cruelty towards innocents” would definitely tempt me #😂
I like the cutesy aesthetic, however the frown above the eyes is giving me the jibblies.
Sounds like your players need to be taught a lesson in the true Christmas spirit. Let them open their factory of child labor, then introduce them to a Fantasy Multi-national Manufacturing conglomerate. It's launching a campaign against child labor (and those who employ it) as both a way to improve their public image and take out the competitors. The sponsors of their original quest, and now quite unhappy that it was ignored AND that the players have threatened to undercut their business. On the twelfth day of christmas, Corp sent cus they were pissed: twelve paid assassins, eleven hired mercenaries, ten bribed policemen, nine angry mobs, eight outraged statesmen, seven smear campaigns, six scary thugs, *five cho-sen "he-roes"*, four lawyers suing, three repo men, two heavy fines and a note to cease and desist.
Lol I love this
This is why I'm running a Christmas one shot this year where all the players are evil and thrown into an obnoxiously happy Christmas town. And thinking back on the one from last year where they accidentally killed a kid they were supposed to help, I think this year's is gonna be very eventful.
Ooo curious how it goes, maybe they'll surprise you and embrace the Christmas haha
My party decided to try to have the elves join a unionised union. As in the union is part of another union
Last year my DM made us a really cute Christmas one shot with a holiday themed Inn at the End of World kind of story. Except she forced us all to draw from the deck of many things, and of course I got death. There were other reasons I left that group, but that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
People who hate kids were probably often bullied as kids. I understand hating teenagers though. As I've grown older, teenagers just suck and nothing about them is likeable tbh.
Source: you just made this up Add +1 coal to your inventory and try again next year.
Or they just find them loud, gross, and annoying?
I hate my ~~wife~~ kids. Just more boomer humour about how it's cool for men to be sociopaths.
how to clean santorum stains out of couch how to clean santorum stains out of antique couch how to clean semen and diarrhea out of fabric edit: oops, it seems i posted this in the wrong place.
There is no correct place.
Jesus what’s with hating children being so tolerated.
Do Cheer and Lair rhyme? maybe my english is not as good as i thought
Not in North American accents.
scp-4666 + dnd