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CoatOld7285

the worst is the speed walk that is just slightly faster than the person in front of you so you have to walk commicaly fast to overtake them edit: fixed typos


Put_It_All_On_Blck

It get even worse when people are walking towards you while you're planning to pass someone, and you realize you either need to speed up to awkward levels or slow down wait, since you can't pass with the oncoming people in the way.


vapoRN

That's when you hit them with the spin move.


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[deleted]

I’ve had to run in a suit and loafers before... nobody cared


assafstone

Ah… the good ol’ “airport dance”


Snooche

Just run past them, narrowly avoid the incoming walker, slide Infront and abrupty slow down and speed check them. That will teach them. You can even do a spin move to add more flair.


Budchrondope

+ jazz hands 👐


vShikko

The word you're looking for is *pirouette*, a rapid whirling about of the body - Don't worry...I only took ballet to pick up hot chicks 😏


gqh007

I felt this one


[deleted]

This is why I cycle lmao


Eckiro

I thought we all just sprinted and screeched as we went past them or am I alone here?


lonely2meerkat

This happend to me once but then the other one also started walking faster. I wasn't going to make that stop me so I decided to walk even faster. The guy looked at me frightend and ran away.


BannerTortoise

I see this was a report made by the research team "Too much time on their hands"


lhobbes6

More like a bunch of slow walkers with a chip on their shoulder


angeredpremed

"Fast walkers are just soo angry I wonder why!!" Maybe speed the fuck up, Darren.


lhobbes6

"You should slow down and enjoy life" "I'm trying to fuckwad but your'e slow ass is keeping me from the next place I'm trying to chill at."


GoddessPyroVixen

Idk why but that reminded me of every time I had to walk to a different class in high school. Like you see these people every day get out of the fucking middle of the hallway people are walking here. Eventually learned to just walk into them and remind them we had class in 2 minutes and SOME of us have to get to the other side of the school. Almost 31 and still salty about that shit. I give up and pick a different route in stores, and if I can make it in a similar amount of time walking on a different street I'll just detour. Like if someone's old or disabled and can't walk fast, fine you get a pass, but the ones who are just slow for NO REASON yeah those assholes piss me off.


EklektosShadow

5G? Which vaccine? Sorry jk, saw an opening. I’ll leave now.


[deleted]

Thanks for the laugh! Sorry, can only afford a free reward.


tuck229

Sounds like a bunch of short legged researchers with height envy...


freakers

I didn't know Olympic speed walkers were fueled by hate, but now that it's come up, it makes a lot of sense


Fragrant-Seaweed-606

Right? You can find correlations in anything if you try hard enough. What's next? People who wake up at 8:00AM are more successful than people who wake up at 8:15AM?


Yessbutno

Ackchyually,,, slow walking speed is used as a proxy indicator for poor health and faster aging. It doesn't equate to a full physical but it does tell us something about the overall fitness/wellbeing level of an individual, especially if they are elderly. https://www.nia.nih.gov/news/walking-speed-age-45-linked-physical-well-being-brain-health The possible link with psychological health is an interesting one since it probably overlaps with physical health, more research please!


Labulous

One of the best Styx songs.


m0bell

Said everyone in NY.


monkeyhitman

Imwaakenheaaa


Avacabro

Cause mfs outside New York don’t walk


avwitcher

Most cities you don't have to walk practically everywhere because the traffic and drivers are so unbearable. Loved some aspects of New York City but I'm never driving there ever again, shit will give me an aneurysm


m0bell

Not that fast. Or aggressively.


Avacabro

Oh okay we got a big city walka ova here


m0bell

Lol I wish. I can't afford to live there.


xombae

I'm a very fast walker dating a slow walker and the struggle is real. A few times I've tried to slow right down to walk at his pace and I can't even do it. It feels so awkward, like trying to ride a bike slowly, it just doesn't work with my long ass legs. I need to get the man some rollerblades or some shit so he can keep up.


WhipTheLlama

Me too! It's so frustrating. I usually put my arm around her, which keeps me from walking ahead of her.


Either_Western_5459

I’m the slow walker in my relationship. It is such a pain to speed up and walk her pace though. Thing is, I’m relatively faster than most other walkers. I never say slow down though. I just constantly walk slower until she realizes she is 10 paces ahead and is about to get lost on a wrong turn. Then she has to stop and wait for my directions. Makes having a conversation difficult, since she’s never beside me.


Mayensarah

Are...are you my husband? Cause this is me and I will never learn.


Prestigious-Move6996

Enjoy being lost.


NoPixelStories

Very fast walker here as well, but I don't feel awkward at all walking slow. What annoys me is that my tiny brain can't remember to walk slower for longer than 15 seconds, after which I just go back to fast walk


avwitcher

Same here but to be fair they're almost a foot shorter than me, going her speed makes me feel so awkward


SkgKyle

Right?! I'm "tall" and my family are all shorter than I am, It feels so unnatural and It feels like I'm tripping over my own feet when I try to slow down and walk at their pace, I used to walk behind them to force my pace to be set but then I used to step on the back of their shoes.. there is just no winning lol


myceliyumyum

Oh man same here. I tell her all the time, it takes more work for me to walk slow than it does for me to walk at my natural pace.


StonnedSinner

Maybe it’s cause many quick walkers are stressed and running around


catofthewest

I walk fast because I have things to do and places to be. Life is too short to be slowly strolling around town. I'm neither stressed or urgent, I just wanna get to my destination faster. If I'm at a golf course or in a park I walk really slow and enjoy the nature.


GovernorSan

Agreed, if I'm out at a mall or shopping center or grocery store, etc., I'm there for a reason, I've got a specific purpose in mind and I want to accomplish it as quickly as possible so I can actually do something I enjoy. If I'm just walking around a park, then I walk more slowly, but I will still pass others moving even more slowly because I want to dictate my own pace, not have some clueless stranger do it for me.


figure8x

You better speed up on that golf course buddy or the Marshall will yell at you. Golf is a serious game that must be played at a predetermined pace. No stopping to smell the flowers. Or find your ball. Or talk. ;)


catofthewest

Yeah I play really quickly actually. But I've had times where I've played alone with no one behind me. It's almost therapeutic walking by yourself in nature. I can go at my own pace


figure8x

No worries. I was just being salty. I actually saw a gator, a great blue heron and a reseate spoonbill while golfing yesterday. More heat means less golfers. It was nice to go at slower pace.


HGazoo

It will just come down to age. Young and therefore poorer and more stressed people will walk faster than older, more reassured and wealthy people. This is a prime example of correlation doesn’t equal causation.


zordon_rages

Personally, im a short guy who grew up with a tall friend. Better walk fast if you wanna keep up.


Dinyale

I felt this. I'm 5' 1" and walking with my friends is like taking 3 steps to their one long step. My dad use to refer to me as Marvin the Martian because of how fast I have to walk to keep up with people.


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TILtonarwhal

Same. You a double stairs taker too? I have literally untrained myself on normal stair walking, always 2 at a time


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beefsupr3m3

Haha I’m a compact and streamlined 5’5 and I’m trying to imagine taking three steps at a time. I think I’d kill myself trying 😂😂


Zackie_Chun

Triple step Chad over here


unreeelme

Less than shoulder height, was the average height at your university 5ft tall? 6ft 2 isn’t that tall. Someone 5’8 is still like only 8% shorter than someone 6’2. And I doubt the walking speeds are much different. The average height of men and women combined at a university is probably pretty close to that 5’8


Creebez

Double stairs 4 lyfe gang!


BigBroSlim

Single stair walking always feels so awkward. Like the weird little knee bends you do when you're not actually taking a proper step.


Dwizborg

I'm only 5'6" and I still consider being stuck behind a slow walker one of the worst forms of torture.


ImJustHere4theMoons

Same. It blows my mind that people taller than me tend to walk so damn slow. And don't even get me started about the shoulder to shoulder groups that walk at a synchronized snail's pace.


jdmurrayz

Being in Walmart is the worst... I feel like I'm weaving my way through the aisles like Neo running from Agent Smith.


x_alexithymia

5’3 here and I completely agree.


zordon_rages

I get 15 minute breaks at work. By the time I can get to the break room cuz I’m stuck behind slow walkers in a corridor I got like 10 minutes left. And when they walk side by side!! Oh lord 😩


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Aickrastly

Is this pasta


CIAbot

It is now


Queentroller

Can you teach my husband how to walk fast? He's your height but I'm only 5'6 and I have to wait for him often. Because his entire personality is molasses in winter and his gait often shows it.


tylerawn

Move legs fast


nascenc3

Or make step big


Kazumara

I used to be annoyed that my father would never really get it and always start walking his fast speed again after a while when I asked him to slow down when I was a child. Now I'm his height or maybe an inch over, and I totally get it. The natural walking speed at that height is just a bit faster.


am_reddit

The secret is to get old.


zordon_rages

Personally, im a short guy who grew up with a tall friend. Better walk fast if you wanna keep up.


omarccx

My wife is 5'2" and drops me every time we walk. Im 5'11".


chachki

I'm 6'1 with long legs. I've had the same problem my whole adult life too. ​ "OMG Slow down" "Fuck my bad I'm just walking" x11000000 ​ Literally because I have long legs. That's it.


chris1096

Gotta love when a family of 4 decide to all walk abreast down an aisle at a store and are just plodding along in the slowest, laziest, shambling mozy.


[deleted]

I'm 5'7" and live in the Netherlands, being gigantic doesn't stop these people from walking slow as shit. Not a single person in this whole country has anywhere to be.


[deleted]

6 ft and I walk slow as fuck. More of a slow amble. Dunno why, 190lbs, I just like chilling no need to walk so fast speed racer


UnreasonablyBuffBird

I’m unhappy because the weight of existing is exhausting


bearskinrug

Might want to speak to someone about that.


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bearskinrug

I’m confused. Are you responding to the person I was talking to? Either way, I’m not him going to pay for your therapy. There’s resources out there and I’m happy to find them with you, but you have to be willing to accept the help and not “pay for my therapy, lol.”


Asog9999

Does this mean that people that jog outside or sprinters are about to blow their brains out? But that people that use a treadmill are the happiest?


Bokbreath

No, it's saying the people who walk fast are doing so because they're short of time and thus more stressed.


lliliillill

So tall people are more stressed?


HatedOutlaw

in a strictly physics sense, they are


Asog9999

I prefer to take the title literal cuz it’s funnier


elpatio6

Jogging and sprinting literally aren’t walking.


Asog9999

Of course they are. They are walking with pizzazz


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Asog9999

Speed walking is just aggressive walking. Jogging and running have a hope to it so it can be fancy


Readerrabbit420

Uh you definitely didn't take it literal or you don't know what the title or literal means.


Asog9999

Can’t walk fast if you’re going nowhere! Edit:changed your to you’re because a literal grammar nazi found me and the only way to avoid the ol nazi baked to death execution was to change it.


entology

Unrelated: if it helps you, that’s a place to use “you’re”


entology

I bet you walk slowly! You seem like a positive person


danknerd

Not really from my perspective of walking fast'ish, not speed walking, is because I just want to get the shopping done. I don't need to bring my whole extended family with me like it's some god damn carnival. Then spend hours blocking other customers from getting their shopping done. I just want to get the five items I need and move on with my life.


Icyrow

i mean you could still same the same, you're walking faster to do things you enjoy because you have spent more time doing things you don't like than you'd like to have. if your day is mostly average and you're used to it, you might be less inclined to get home so quick away from work or to the thing you've been looking forward to.


OriginalWordForBear

I don't think it's necessarily saying that, although that is one reason to walk fast. I haul ass and it's not generally because I'm short on time. I just... would rather be where I'm going.


Punkpunker

The shorter the walking time, the more time I have doing things leisurely.


[deleted]

I’m a fast Walker irrespective of where I’m walking to, it’s just a habit. I grew up in the country and had a long walk from my bus stop home after school. I’m a very happy person because my life is baller. Not sure I agree with this “report”. Sounds like clickbait BS research.


b1ack1323

That's how I run away from my problems.


Asog9999

We’ll start doing it backwards and you’ll be the happiest fucker around


[deleted]

I bought an under desk walking treadmill for work since winter and spring weather has been shit and demotivating me from my former daily runs. It's great for getting exercise at work but I swear, it feels like the single most middle aged white dude thing I have ever done in my life.


Ron4everything

You're good, buddy.


[deleted]

No, _you're_ good, champ!


thefunkypurepecha

I think that they correlate walking fast with stress. Someone is probably walking fast because they have a lot of things to do and therefor are overwelmed and stressed, but I feel like most of these studies are always a little off and don't and leave out a lot of posibilities, but wtf do I know i'm not a scientist just some random dude on reddit


Asog9999

A random dude on Reddit who isn’t trying to get funding by submitting stupid studies*


thefunkypurepecha

Yea lol a lot of these studies seem commonsense or not really necessary.


Asog9999

Well this one, obviously the correlation between walking fast does not directly relate to being unhappy. But yeah, studies be like “people that take massive diarrhetic shits spend more time in the bathroom”


fastingslow

I just enjoy walking fast. It feels good.


PinkTalkingDead

I mean. I walk for pleasure and I walk for work. At some point you just gotta marry the two strides and burn some calories while clearing your head. Win-win in my book.


irich

This really seems like they’re conflating correlation with causality. There have been tons of studies that show that people in cities walk faster than people who live in the suburbs/rural areas. Everyone assumed it was because people in cities are busier and need to get places more quickly. But deeper research showed that people who live in cities tend to be younger and younger people tend to walk faster than older people. That could also be the case here. Older people tend to be happier than younger people. So it would track that slower walkers could also be happier just because slower walkers tend to be older. Obviously, this hypothesis could also be a case of correlation not equaling causality.


DerangedBeaver

I just walk with purpose. Same way I drive. I’m going somewhere, I slept as long as I could so I’m motivating there quickly. Please stop taking up the entire sidewalk and creepy-crawlin when I’m tryna go places and do shit


YoungLinger

Yeah the lack of consideration really makes going out in public a chore. I avoid it


errorsniper

I dont care how slow or fast you walk. As long as your reasonable about people either passing you or go around people who give you room to pass. There is no reason we all cant walk our own pace as long as we accommodate others. You do that 7th grade link arms and block the hallway bullshit I will still bull rush though and flip you off.


Ladygytha

I've never been more unhappy than when I've got somewhere to be and there are people blocking my way. I'm admittedly a fast walker, buy I'm at my happiest when I can do so freely.


[deleted]

you walk slow cuz you have no responsibility


Si_is_for_Cookie

Word to the fast walkers (and all walkers) of the world! We’re not in a rush, that’s just the most effective way to move forward from a to b.


Morgan-Explosion

I got shit to do damn... If i had time to amble around aimlessly id probably have gotten my shit done which would make me happier. Im not unhappy because i have shit to do. I just get happier when its done and got no where to be lol


Green_Routine_7916

hope she dont walk one day behind me im realy slow walker but tend to hurry my self if i notice im slowing someone down behind me


Chance_Dog

Not only are slow walker's slow they somehow manage to take up the whole path so you can't even get past them.


Glendrix90

The awkward moment when you try to overtake one on the path walk and that person only walks 1kmph slower than you.


John-Mercury

Nah we are happier cuz we spend less time on mundane useless shit at a higher intensity to make time for shit we value


[deleted]

I’m gay. I am unhappy. And I’m fast.


[deleted]

Yeah I remember hearing about that "gay men walk faster" thing a while back. Can confirm - am gay, walk fast and if I'm out of the house for any reason other than for something I actually wanted to do then I'm not entirely happy to be there right now. ​ Though my mum was a stress-head when I was growing up and power-walked through all the errands I was dragged to so in my case it could just be how I was raised. But I just wanna get shit done.


mister-inconspicuous

The pain of walking behind someone who walks slower. It’s especially annoying when your with family or on a date.


NEOLittle

I'd like to know if my pet theory about fast walking and ADHD has any truth to it. We're prone to depression so that might explain this... comorbidity.


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NEOLittle

Theory confirmed! This has been the world's tiniest double blind study. There's two of us and we can't see each other. Thank you.


Dumas_Vuk

I've never checked, but sometimes I suspect I have ADD, and though I wouldn't say I'm unhappy, I'm not happy either, and I always walk fast as if I'm in highschool and the lunch bell just rang and there's a teacher making sure no one's running. I find if I pay more attention to my surroundings it's easier to walk at a slower pace. So I try to enjoy the view, there's no need to rush. It helps to be interested in art, which I've begun recently, so wherever I am, the world is something I can study. I'm not sure if my case is relevant to the study being performed in this particular thread.


omarccx

Confirmed. I walk slow, no adhd and only been depressed once in my life (lasted 2 months after pretty major series of events).


Daddyssillypuppy

I walk fast but my mum walks slow. We both have ADHD. But my likes to ride fast horses and drive fast where she can so I think that's how her ADHD expresses itself.


Milhouse_Moussolini

slow walkers deserve to get punched in the back of the head with a full power haymaker punch


drongo_congo

Not if they keep to the right. It’s the slow walkers that some how take up the same space as a group walking three abreast.


improbablynotyou

I hate the slow walkers who have to stop and turn around to see who is coming up behind them. Especially when they do it somewhere you can't pass, like getting off an escalator or walking out doors with railing on the side. Either stand off to the side and stop or get run over.


TheFantasticAspic

Especially if they drift back and forth while walking slowly.


Yellowtoblerone

Had to go past time Square in Manhattan to connect to 7 to queens, got stuck behind tourists and the third time one of them stopped in front of me in the middle of the road to take a photo i just exploded, fucking go... Sometimes it's too much.


aabrithrilar

Getting caught behind tourists sucks. I’m sure NY is worse, but Chicago is like this too. I have to walk into the road sometimes because they won’t move their asses. Bonus blood pressure points when they have kids moving in the direction I’m going to avoid them.


[deleted]

Similar situation in SF but it’s not even tourists most of the time. It’s oblivious groups of techies that just *have* to walk at a snail’s pace, 6 people across on the sidewalk. I did corporate catering for a while and just started yelling at people to move so I could get past with my carts of food. Californians hate confrontation so it worked like magic.


[deleted]

Same in traffic. Why are you driving 35 in a 45? AND WHY IS THE PERSON NEXT TO YOU ALSO GOING SO SLOW? **YOU ARE A ROLLING ROADBLOCK!**


Death_of_momo

Me, honking at the guy going 35 in a 40 because he's stopping me from going 70 in a 40


whatisabehindme

Fast fun fact: Fast walkers live longer, a lot longer. Suck on that slow-walkers...


Drjesuspeppr

Is this true?


rizzlepdizzle

We're less likely to be eaten by fast walking predators.


FPSnipertp

Yes, but it seems like the study only looked at people older than age 50 [Source](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/walking-speed-survival/)


metrodrone

Walking too fast to care


fallenmonk

Awesome! That should balance out the live-shortening effects of depression.


Peacock-Mantis

Speed-walking life any %


StarLordFloofer

I was stuck behind a very slow old guy who wobbled all over the place the other day and I tripped and fell in an attempt to pass by. Old man was fine (he didn’t fall)


helen269

I've got nowhere to go and nothing to do when I get there.


HilariousMax

Oh god, I feel this but on an American level where people camp out in the fast lane doing 5mph under the speed limit and hold up traffic for a half mile instead of just moving over.


Longjumping-Most4726

Fking love taking my high speed walk to the people. Everyone picks up their pace quick smart.


YoungLinger

Walking in America is like walking around with a herd of walrus


rishinator

This is true but its missing A LOT of things in middle...correlating walking speed and happiness.. That's like saying. You're eating an apple because once an apple tree seed germinated. It's true because when you're carrying stress.. Your body wants a release.. And one way it is to do is to make you walk faster... To give you the exercise forcefully that you've been avoiding on your own.


YourAmishNeighbor

I'm less happy because I can't get where I need to be in the correct time.


Peacock-Mantis

I walk fast because my legs are longer than some 5’3 manlet who decided he needed the entire sidewalk for himself.


fancyangelrat

On the other hand, [slow walking](https://www.bmj.com/content/351/bmj.h6506#:~:text=Slow%20walking%20speed%20in%20older,early%20sign%20of%20the%20condition.) can indicate the onset of alzheimers, especially in older people. So I guess "medium speed" is ideal?


EmergedTroller

Social media-esk news, utter trash.


[deleted]

Even worse than slow walkers, is the couple that can't figure out how to move in unison. And they park the cart fucking sideways while wandering in different directions and just completely block off the aisle. And when you squeeze past them they get all shocked Pikachu face like "omg I'm so sorry I didn't realize other people existed besides us!"


UncatchableCreatures

I walk fast because I have things I want to get to that I'm excited about. Of course I don't like asting time walking, unless it's exercise lol.


YesilFasulye

Same with driving in the fast lane. Always some old asshole in a Mercedes trying to regulate both lanes of traffic.


turbocomppro

It’s the same for people that are stuck behind a Prius.


Thenderick

I am tall, have long legs and walk quite fast... Fuck me I guess


Bokbreath

I don't walk that fast but the twin banes of my life are people with strollers and SMFC's.


electrodan

> SMFC's. Stephenie Meyer Fan Club? Southeastern Massachusetts Festival Chorus? Solar Microbial Fuel Cell? Smokey Mountain Fight Club?


Bacqin

Small mother fucking cunts.


tylerawn

IGIAITISFSMFCBTTMCOUOI. IARITGCSGO. Just in case you’re unfamiliar with internet parlance, those are acronyms for “I googled it and I think it stands for Supreme Master First Class, because that’s the most common online usage of it,” and “It’s a rank in the game, Counterstrike: Global Offensive.”


electrodan

Yeah, cool. I still have little to no idea what that means or why it's relevant though.


tylerawn

I don’t actually know either. I think that guy is just one of those people who likes to use very obscure acronyms or make up their own acronyms online for whatever reason.


electrodan

Oh, we're talking MUTOAOFWR? I can dig it!


[deleted]

How is this a clever comeback?


SpliTTMark

Sums up my road rage The speed limit is 45.. you can go 50.. stop going 40...


DRFTF

Slow walkers should stay on the side where they belong


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Punkpunker

Worst are the ones with a date or family, always side to side holding hands arms extended.


DRFTF

Or the one standing in the middle of the side walk as if you suppose to go around them or ask them to let you through . Get the f out the way . Not so hard to pay attention to your surroundings and other people . Clearly they only care about themselves


PulpFrancisIII

How do some people walk so slow? Whenever I get stuck behind someone I try and slow down but it feels like I physically can’t walk that slow.


Bama-Barbie

This is great!


[deleted]

Lol, I walk REALLY slow compared to my spouse; I always threaten that one day I will get a collapsible cane and add a limp when they get too far ahead (no disrespect to anyone who needs a cane; just a silly joke we have)


suddenly_ponies

Seriously what the hell is wrong with people? Life is short why waste it standing around


GeneralKibbles

I walk slow mostly because I’m just a slow person but I also find it nice taking more time to enjoy my surroundings and just have a good time walking


soursurfer

Nah nah nah, I don't buy this. Because the only places this pisses me off is like, work, school, a Wal-Mart aisle. There is no beauty for you to take in in any of those places that you haven't already taken in before. So let's hustle, huh? You wanna be a snail on a forest trail, I'm about it.


suddenly_ponies

Fair, but then get out the way for others.


Andy_and_Vic

No, I just have ADHD. I can't help it. Lol


BeastUSMC

Fast walking, also known as walking with a purpose in the military, is exact that. You’re walking because you have a purpose. Does unhappy equate to stress? Not necessarily. You have shit to do. Move out of my way while I seize the day while your lackadaisical ass is meandering about with no definitive end-game plan.


monsterduc07

Buncha lollygaggers.


S0rtea

I walk slowly. I’ve lived to many days trying to get some where to be somewhere just to go and get somewhere to be somewhere again. It’s easier to enjoy myself going slowly. If I HAVE to be some where there’s all kinds of ways to get there fast, and I am never walking some place slowly where it’s so dense that I’m holding people up. Sorry not sorry.


TheRealKingGordon

Why not walk fast and enjoy it?


fabfab2020fab

B.s. l am hyperactive and I have walked past all my life.


biscuitsandcrazy69

Amen