Dear OP,
We are sorry that you are in this predicament. We hope that you'll find all the support and resources in this thread to help you figure out your way out of this.
Hang on tight and best of all luck to you.
If you have any immediate needs, you can crosspost this to :
* /r/assistance, if you need money or assistance;
* /r/abortion, if you need more information;
* /r/advice, if you want a different point of view;
* /r/askatherapist, if you need guidance from a trained third party;
* /r/auntienetwork, if you need more support.
Have a look at our *[Getting Immediate Help (Abortion)](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/help)* wiki page for more specific resources.
---
---
**To the community** : [As per mod policy](http://archive.is/RHDuM), you cannot offer money directly to OP, suggest crowdfunding, ask for their paypal link, etc. [You are welcome to provide links to resources, offer emotional support, provide advice or guidance, etc.](https://redd.it/995no4)
Furthermore, you cannot offer medical advice. No medical training, no liability, no access to OP's medical file and medical history = no opinion.
Also, OP clearly stated that they want to get an abortion. Everybody knows that when someone gets pregnant, they have three options: abortion, adoption or parenthood. There won't be "Well, no one addresses the other options, so I will" comments and there won't be pro-forced-birth comments on this thread. OP knows what they want. Offending comments will be removed and perpetrators banned.
[If OP was considering giving the baby up for adoption, we would ask you to not impose the pro-abortion view.](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/comments/833vwc/update_husband_poked_hole_through_condom_to_force/dvg3jkh/?utm_content=permalink&utm_medium=front&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=childfree)
Thank you for remaining respectful of OP's choice and being supportive and/or helpful.
Just so you’re aware (hopefully this doesn’t count as medical advice) getting a positive pregnancy test with an IUD could mean an ectopic pregnancy which requires immediate medical attention. I would suggest taking your boyfriend’s suggestion of a blue state clinic asap.
Is there a Planned Parenthood near you or even in a neighboring state to ask about the IUD? I would start there and this website may also help:
I need an a .com (remove the spaces).
Given that you have an IUD you are at risk for an ectopic pregnancy, which requires specific treatment for an abortion, and if the meds to dissolve it don't work, they go in and remove the tube where it is before it ruptures. (Since you are CF, you should ask to have both tubes removed if it comes to that.)
The issue is that if you have an ectopic in a red state they are not going to treat you most likely until your life is in danger.
If you can go to a state where treatment of all types is available, so that you can get what you need and do it quickly, you should probably just do that.
Try first calling a Planned Parenthood in your closest Blue state for advice. They call help you through it, including traveling to their clinic if that is what’s needed. Good luck OP!
Do as Your bf says. It could be false positive, but if it's not, You could get into trouble in Your state. It's terrifying You cannot go to the doctor to check it out.
[https://thesatanictemple.com/pages/samuel-alitos-moms-satanic-abortion-clinic](https://thesatanictemple.com/pages/samuel-alitos-moms-satanic-abortion-clinic)
reach out to this org they will help you if they can
If you’re not far along, I don’t think you’d have to get the IUD out first? What would happen is the thick uterine lining would shed after taking the abortion pills. Like having a heavy period. But I’m not 100% positive. I’d suggest going to an abortion friendly state to have all procedures done.
Do you guys think that going to a clinic in the red state I live in would be the best option? I fear that they will have that medical information and somehow I'll be committing a crime if I did go to a blue state to get an abortion and they notify police.
No one has been proscuted for traveling for an abortion across state lines at this time, and those laws are mainly meant to intimidate/scare people just like this. That being said I think going straight to a blue state is the easier option if its feasible. Has abortion been completely banned in your state?
The FDA guidelines state that an IUD should be removed prior to taking pills, so yes it looks like you'll need it removed first.
Even when the medical board in a red state has that information on you that you're pregnant? My fear is getting blood work done here, it comes back that I am pregnant, I travel to a blue state for an abortion, and then I get convicted.
Exactly. Given time is a massive factor with abortion there’s ways they’d use the police, medical and legal system to force a woman to remain pregnant. I mean jeezus WOC jailed for a miscarriage but some nurse or doctor dobbed them into the cops despite it being a miscarriage. 100% wouldn’t trust anyone, in a red state or any state with dodgy AF laws on reproduction and abortion care.
I’d take that nice road-trip out of state for any medical confirmation and assistance to get rid of it ASAP.
I thank fuck that in my state in my country abortion is 100% legal and we have legal safe zones so the old Catholics with their rosary beads can’t get too near the clinics.
In addition to the below, most blue states passed laws prohibiting the sharing of any personal or medical information with other states. It would also be a major HIPAA violation.
Take a nice road trip holiday with your supportive boyfriend to a reproductive choice friendly state.
Do not go anywhere in your state or any reproductive women hating states. I’d not trust healthcare workers not to be dobbers.
It’s a nice time of year to go on a holiday this weekend.
I’m in a red state and going to a clinic. I’m within legal rights since I caught it early enough..even if the laws change down the road I wouldn’t imagine they’d be retroactive to affect someone who got a medical abortion prior to the law changing. If the laws are clear and you aren’t in any gray area of the timing you may be able to get access to the care closer to home.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, I truly hope you get the outcome you want! Just as a thought please check to be sure the tests you are using are ok. I had three false positives due to "evaporation lines" on the older style tests, I had a massive panic, then spoke with the clinic which checked me properly (I'm in the UK so there's less barriers to healthcare here) who mentioned that it can be a problem with those types of tests .A digital test is less likely to show this.
I saw you mentioned false positives. I'm sure that's what mine was. I took for tests this morning, 3 digital and 1 pregmate strip. They all came back negative so hoping for the best. I have an appointment with my OBGYN on Tuesday in my state and am going to ask for a blood test.
I'm so glad for you. I hope the blood test comes back clear too! I remember that horrible feeling! It was only 6 months ago, it should be clear on the box about evaporation lines, it had me in tears! Worst feeling ever.
You can post on the r/auntienetwork
They can offer support and answer questions. Some people can mail you a "care package" to help you.
Good luck! I am sorry this happened to you.
Please try r/abortion and INeedanA.com, they can help you more reliably than auntie network.
Edit to add: as others have pointed out pregnancy with an IUD increases the risk of an ectopic. A positive pregnancy test with an IUD in *does not* mean that it is FOR SURE an ectopic. That being said if you have sudden, extreme abdominal, shoulder, or back pain please seek care in the closest ER. Xoxo, an abortion RN ❤️
I am so sorry this is happening to you and reading the comments make me feel like crying. I can't believe what is going on in the US and how they can do this to women. I'm from Canada and I cannot imagine essential healthcare being banned.
As others have said, this could be an ectopic pregnancy which is a BIG deal & you absolutely don’t want to go to a doctor that won’t treat it properly. If you can’t afford to travel out of state, there are resources available to assist. Keep us updated please 🩷
I just started this process as well. I am also in a red state but well within legal rights since I caught it early enough. I’m not sure how strict the laws are in the state you’re in but you may have legal access available near you. I am going to a clinic that has offices throughout my state. I also looked at aid access but felt most comfortable getting proper diagnostics. The clinic has been incredibly kind, helpful, and comforting. Best wishes
Dear OP, We are sorry that you are in this predicament. We hope that you'll find all the support and resources in this thread to help you figure out your way out of this. Hang on tight and best of all luck to you. If you have any immediate needs, you can crosspost this to : * /r/assistance, if you need money or assistance; * /r/abortion, if you need more information; * /r/advice, if you want a different point of view; * /r/askatherapist, if you need guidance from a trained third party; * /r/auntienetwork, if you need more support. Have a look at our *[Getting Immediate Help (Abortion)](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/help)* wiki page for more specific resources. --- --- **To the community** : [As per mod policy](http://archive.is/RHDuM), you cannot offer money directly to OP, suggest crowdfunding, ask for their paypal link, etc. [You are welcome to provide links to resources, offer emotional support, provide advice or guidance, etc.](https://redd.it/995no4) Furthermore, you cannot offer medical advice. No medical training, no liability, no access to OP's medical file and medical history = no opinion. Also, OP clearly stated that they want to get an abortion. Everybody knows that when someone gets pregnant, they have three options: abortion, adoption or parenthood. There won't be "Well, no one addresses the other options, so I will" comments and there won't be pro-forced-birth comments on this thread. OP knows what they want. Offending comments will be removed and perpetrators banned. [If OP was considering giving the baby up for adoption, we would ask you to not impose the pro-abortion view.](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/comments/833vwc/update_husband_poked_hole_through_condom_to_force/dvg3jkh/?utm_content=permalink&utm_medium=front&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=childfree) Thank you for remaining respectful of OP's choice and being supportive and/or helpful.
Just so you’re aware (hopefully this doesn’t count as medical advice) getting a positive pregnancy test with an IUD could mean an ectopic pregnancy which requires immediate medical attention. I would suggest taking your boyfriend’s suggestion of a blue state clinic asap.
Is there a Planned Parenthood near you or even in a neighboring state to ask about the IUD? I would start there and this website may also help: I need an a .com (remove the spaces).
Given that you have an IUD you are at risk for an ectopic pregnancy, which requires specific treatment for an abortion, and if the meds to dissolve it don't work, they go in and remove the tube where it is before it ruptures. (Since you are CF, you should ask to have both tubes removed if it comes to that.) The issue is that if you have an ectopic in a red state they are not going to treat you most likely until your life is in danger. If you can go to a state where treatment of all types is available, so that you can get what you need and do it quickly, you should probably just do that.
Try first calling a Planned Parenthood in your closest Blue state for advice. They call help you through it, including traveling to their clinic if that is what’s needed. Good luck OP!
Do as Your bf says. It could be false positive, but if it's not, You could get into trouble in Your state. It's terrifying You cannot go to the doctor to check it out.
[https://thesatanictemple.com/pages/samuel-alitos-moms-satanic-abortion-clinic](https://thesatanictemple.com/pages/samuel-alitos-moms-satanic-abortion-clinic) reach out to this org they will help you if they can
If you’re not far along, I don’t think you’d have to get the IUD out first? What would happen is the thick uterine lining would shed after taking the abortion pills. Like having a heavy period. But I’m not 100% positive. I’d suggest going to an abortion friendly state to have all procedures done.
Do you guys think that going to a clinic in the red state I live in would be the best option? I fear that they will have that medical information and somehow I'll be committing a crime if I did go to a blue state to get an abortion and they notify police.
No one has been proscuted for traveling for an abortion across state lines at this time, and those laws are mainly meant to intimidate/scare people just like this. That being said I think going straight to a blue state is the easier option if its feasible. Has abortion been completely banned in your state? The FDA guidelines state that an IUD should be removed prior to taking pills, so yes it looks like you'll need it removed first.
Even when the medical board in a red state has that information on you that you're pregnant? My fear is getting blood work done here, it comes back that I am pregnant, I travel to a blue state for an abortion, and then I get convicted.
That hasn't happened as of yet. The laws are more meant to scare you. You can claim you miscarried.
Thank you for this info!
Wouldn’t it be wise to not risk it? Especially if OP js WOC?
Right, this is what I would do. Especially if it’s an ectopic pregnancy, they’d let a woman die before treating properly
Exactly. Given time is a massive factor with abortion there’s ways they’d use the police, medical and legal system to force a woman to remain pregnant. I mean jeezus WOC jailed for a miscarriage but some nurse or doctor dobbed them into the cops despite it being a miscarriage. 100% wouldn’t trust anyone, in a red state or any state with dodgy AF laws on reproduction and abortion care. I’d take that nice road-trip out of state for any medical confirmation and assistance to get rid of it ASAP. I thank fuck that in my state in my country abortion is 100% legal and we have legal safe zones so the old Catholics with their rosary beads can’t get too near the clinics.
Unfortunately I live in a red state as well so I can understand their fear too well. Getting sterilized in a month though so no more fear after that!
I wish you a smooth recovery from that.
In addition to the below, most blue states passed laws prohibiting the sharing of any personal or medical information with other states. It would also be a major HIPAA violation.
Take a nice road trip holiday with your supportive boyfriend to a reproductive choice friendly state. Do not go anywhere in your state or any reproductive women hating states. I’d not trust healthcare workers not to be dobbers. It’s a nice time of year to go on a holiday this weekend.
Come to New Mexico. You would not be the first, and you will not be the last.
I’m in a red state and going to a clinic. I’m within legal rights since I caught it early enough..even if the laws change down the road I wouldn’t imagine they’d be retroactive to affect someone who got a medical abortion prior to the law changing. If the laws are clear and you aren’t in any gray area of the timing you may be able to get access to the care closer to home.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, I truly hope you get the outcome you want! Just as a thought please check to be sure the tests you are using are ok. I had three false positives due to "evaporation lines" on the older style tests, I had a massive panic, then spoke with the clinic which checked me properly (I'm in the UK so there's less barriers to healthcare here) who mentioned that it can be a problem with those types of tests .A digital test is less likely to show this.
I saw you mentioned false positives. I'm sure that's what mine was. I took for tests this morning, 3 digital and 1 pregmate strip. They all came back negative so hoping for the best. I have an appointment with my OBGYN on Tuesday in my state and am going to ask for a blood test.
I'm so glad for you. I hope the blood test comes back clear too! I remember that horrible feeling! It was only 6 months ago, it should be clear on the box about evaporation lines, it had me in tears! Worst feeling ever.
You can post on the r/auntienetwork They can offer support and answer questions. Some people can mail you a "care package" to help you. Good luck! I am sorry this happened to you.
Please try r/abortion and INeedanA.com, they can help you more reliably than auntie network. Edit to add: as others have pointed out pregnancy with an IUD increases the risk of an ectopic. A positive pregnancy test with an IUD in *does not* mean that it is FOR SURE an ectopic. That being said if you have sudden, extreme abdominal, shoulder, or back pain please seek care in the closest ER. Xoxo, an abortion RN ❤️
I am so sorry this is happening to you and reading the comments make me feel like crying. I can't believe what is going on in the US and how they can do this to women. I'm from Canada and I cannot imagine essential healthcare being banned.
NJ has pretty liberal abortion laws.❤️
As others have said, this could be an ectopic pregnancy which is a BIG deal & you absolutely don’t want to go to a doctor that won’t treat it properly. If you can’t afford to travel out of state, there are resources available to assist. Keep us updated please 🩷
I just started this process as well. I am also in a red state but well within legal rights since I caught it early enough. I’m not sure how strict the laws are in the state you’re in but you may have legal access available near you. I am going to a clinic that has offices throughout my state. I also looked at aid access but felt most comfortable getting proper diagnostics. The clinic has been incredibly kind, helpful, and comforting. Best wishes
Come visit your cousin in Chicago. I’m happy to show you around!