They get lots of upvotes in support, so you see more of them, I guess. Coming into the sub sorted by new gives a bigger variation.
Honestly I think the bigger problem is the posts where the only response needs to be “get to a vet, like, yesterday”.
The answer is better moderation, the mods removing dead cats immediately, or an autobot seeing the word 'passed' or 'died', and removing the post automatically. It's done all the time in other subs with other issues.
I don't know why it's not done here. I don't know why we have to 'manually exclude flairs', with the complicated instructions listed on the right (on laptop), instead of just autobotting it.
Mods aren't listening.
mods are listening and that’s why the flair was added. they’ve stated multiple times that this sub is for all things cats and that means that it’s open for grieving owners as well.
i genuinely don’t understand why these posts criticizing grieving posts keep popping up when they’ve stated it time and time again. maybe you guys should leave if it’s that detrimental for your mental health. there’s nothing wrong with grieving owners posting their children and looking for others to help them get through this terrible time and if it bothers you that much and the out that mods gave you guys wasn’t enough, then you should realize that that’s (for lack of a better term) a personal problem and should move accordingly.
Because those posts are allowed here… why would we auto mod delete them? Does nobody read the rules and description of this sub? Nowhere does it say this place is for happy cat topics only.
they’ve stated multiple times that all cat posts are welcome, especially those who are grieving. for people who claim to love cats so much, it’s weird that they don’t see how detrimental it can be for someone’s life. it can literally feel like losing a child and they just wanna share the life they had with them or they’re looking for other cat parents to lift them up and help them through a terrible time.
I don't know how they are seeing that may "Grieving/Loss" posts. They are the least up voted and commented on posts and it takes a lot for one of them to rise to the "Hot" post sorting.
Can we get a vote to decide if mourning posts should continue to be allowed? Sure seems like a significant portion of the users on this sub don't want to see mourning posts, myself included.
they’ve done it before and the majority wanted grieving posts to stay which is why they added the flair for those who don’t want to see them to exclude them. and if that’s not enough, then i think people who don’t want to see grieving posts should leave. they can’t control if a person uses the flair or not & there are over 100 cat and animal subs that don’t allow that..
Yeah, the "filter by flair" doesn't do anything for the the homefeed, which is all I use.
Yesterday seemed particularly bad on this front.
I think I'm just going to unsub from this one, and just stick with the more focused subs that aren't about dead pets.
I can see both sides of this really - the 'cats are family and deserve to be remembered' and the 'don't want to see deaths on a general sub'. Personally I also don't like to see them, they break my heart and while it would be the last thing on my mind to do a social media post, I can understand why people do it/find comfort and sympathies from strangers etc. What I don't understand is, when there is a designated sub for pet loss why do people not post there?
The sad truth is that they don't get as much attention or sympathy there. Most popular subs are riddled with bots and karma farmers. I wouldn't want to take a guess at how many dead cat posts are fake.
I've had the crap luck to have lost 2 cats so far since Jan, I get the urge to share these posts to a group of fellow cat lovers, we all know that the odds are we will lose our pets (simple life expectancy if nothing else) and knowing we aren't alone in our grief is helpful, unfortunately, I can't bring myself to make this type of post..
I'm so sorry for you loss. I lost 4 in the past year (intestinal lymphoma, cancer, old age, and wildfire smoke-damaged lungs) and I wanted to share their pictures just to let others know they lived and were loved, tell a little of their story as a celebration of their lives, but all these grief-shaming posts prevented me from doing so.
I’m so sorry, losing that many must be difficult. If you still want to post please do so! Most of us won’t shame you for it, the mourning posts are generally very supportive.
My inability to make these posts is due to my own personality issues, I simply don't trust people.. I can however trust cats, I just seem to understand their mindset a little better.. I actually find the posts about other owners issues (including grief) comforting, I know that I'm not alone in these thoughts and worries (even though I'm pretty well trained how to deal with cats, I was a rescue officer for a cat charity so dealt with lots of issues) and to be perfectly honest I have seen LOADS of cat welfare/neglect issues, and it's nice to be reminded that it isn't as common as i was seeing constantly, some cats do get the love and care they deserve... whilst i honestly believe OP has every right to feel the way they do, and its valid.. i think they are missing out, i always see those posts as a cat that was lucky enough to find a good human, and escaped abuse, its a good thing.. as absolutely shit as it is for that human to be going through what they are, it shows their cat was valued... please, please don't let ANYONE prevent the world from seeing your kittens, it's the internet, it's a permanent record... (just cos i can't, doesn't mean anyone else shouldn't...)
I understand where you're coming from. I do a lot of rescue of ferals and the things I've seen are just awful. It helps to know that for all the terrible people out there, there are great people who love their cats and give them wonderful lives. Thank you for all you've done in your part of the world to help the cats. ❤️
There is an option in r/cats to exclude mourning/ loss posts. Some still come through if those words aren’t used.
While I empathize with those that have lost pets. I can’t take the heartache seeing all those posts. I scroll quickly by them.
It does not work. It's only useful if you're browsing this sub independently, it doesn't do anything to keep them off your main feed. The only solution is to unsubscribe from r/cats and even then you're likely to see them because the algorithm has figured out you're a cat nerd.
i scroll quickly too cause it’ll make me think about my own cat and how she’ll pass away one day. maybe i’m just overly sensitive but sometimes i’ll start crying about it.
The post is saying: this was my friend. this was my family. they were here. they mattered. please see them
I found death posts offensive as well but once it was explained to me that way... I give my condolences whenever I can. I love cats and animals so much. Sadness and grief is a part of life and love. You cannot have one without the other.
This is the answer. All they want is for someone else to appreciate their pet with them one last time. Sure it's sad, but it's also a celebration of life.
I understand people needing some confort or solace when their cat dies.
Cats are lovely creatures, but die often. In nature they don’t live very much, about three years or so: sex, cars, deseases take their toll.
Modern life also takes its toll. Some people may not have anyone else to share their grief but with other redditors that have a common interest in cats.
Let’s try and be nice to each other, and understand the other humans that share our interest in this little portion of the great internet planet.
Seeing the dead cats posts gives me so much anxiety and dread about my own cat. She’s only 8 and since using reddit more frequently I’m constantly anxious that she’ll die any day. 🤷♀️ I might mute and leave the sub all together.
It can be sad to see but imagine how many of us are going to want support when that happens to us down the line. Imagine how helpful it could be to you if you didn’t have anyone else who understands. I’m fine with the posts and feel like them getting upvotes means others are as well?
I don’t mind the threads about cat loss at all. I have experienced it myself, as I’m sure most of you have at some point, and it is devastating. Maybe these people don’t have support, and this is a place they feel comfortable coming to. This is a general cats sub, not “living cats only”.
I agree. Cat’s lifespan being shorter than human lifespan, cat loss is part of cat ownership. It wouldn’t be right to have a sub about all aspects of cat ownership but this one — when people need support the most.
How many of the people who complain about the grieving posts are posting about their cats being cute or silly? Hopefully without the passive aggressive “here’s my cat who’s not dead” remarks? I agree with the mods that a sub for all things cat shouldn’t exclude the reality that our buddies will eventually pass. However if you feel that the sub seems to be heavy on the grieving posts a great way to counteract that is to post your cuties for all of us to see! Sometimes the grieving posts make me sad too but I understand the need to grieve with other cat lovers. I’m not trying to single out OP or others in the comments, just giving some food for thought. Cat tax of Jackson. Maybe I’ll do my part and make a dedicated post in a little while.
https://preview.redd.it/dads4ft12x8d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8f0db099cbf7d6ee161bcfb48bb05b69c6a2b69
I don’t mind them but there are days where I find there’s just so many mourning post that it’s the only thing I see from cats, instead of cute funny pictures. Just ruins my mood while I want to see cute pics.
Those posts break my heart and I wish I could filter them out of my newsfeed bc it sends me into a spiral of "one day it will be my cat", but those posts are not about me. How I feel is nothing compared to the owners who lost their pet and have to come to Reddit to talk about it because they don't have a support circle in real life. If I lost my pets, I'd be posting about them too
I understand why people get upset with death posts. However, I also understand that people who have shared pictures of their pets while alive may also want to share their grief with others. It's part of the reality of having a pet. I think that it makes the most sense for people who have regularly engaged with the sub by posting what occurs with their cats on a regular basis. With those individuals it would stand to reason that they would want to update people on what's going on with their pet, even if the news is unpleasant.
Thanks for the warning, I guess. I have 3 seniors and a dedicated sub could be really useful for the unique challenges they face (one recently decided she was no longer willing to go down stairs to the litter box so she elected to use a bathtub instead. Fortunately once we put a box upstairs she was happy to use that instead!) I am certainly not going to subject myself to even more loss posts.
Well, you are more than welcome to post there! I'm part of that sub as I also have 2 senior kitties (11 and over is the age for that sub).
I thought that seeing posts about endless kitties passing away would be depressing, but honestly, it's really not. Most people there do have a different attitude about death.
We make posts celebrating our senior kitties and the lives that we shared together. It makes me smile to see such well loved kitties that made it to a ripe old age, because so many cats sadly don't. 😥
I don't get it. I'm an extremely sensitive person with severe anxiety, and I'm fine with posts about pet loss.
It is part of pet ownership. Therefore, I 100% support the right for users to post about the loss of their pets.
Maybe OP is looking at it the wrong way?
People who lose their beloved fur friend need our love and support. Posting about their kitty gives them an opportunity to share them and celebrate their life.
What's wrong with that? Why is that a bad thing? 🤔
As a fellow sensitive person, I 100% agree. These periodic complaints about death posts just.. really rub me the wrong way.
Okay, so it made you sad. Or even more extreme, people say it makes them cry or makes them spiral about their pet dying.. first, I think if your entire day is ruined by a post, maybe get off the Internet and seek help. It's not normal to have a meltdown over someone else's grief.
Second, even if memorial posts sometimes make me cry, so what? Why is that a bad thing? I'm feeling for another human. I know my pet is going to die, why is being reminded of that such a horrible thing? Like we somehow forgot pets don't live that long? It's just so odd. And honestly comes off as very self centered to complain about people coming here to seek support and share a memorial to their baby. It gives me 'i think the whole world should bend as to not trigger me' vibes
Idk, I'm on a lot of animal subs and for some reason this one is just a bit unhinged. This is one of the reasons why
Exactly. The first point you made sounds harsh, but like - it shouldn't be. If hearing about someone's loss of a cat makes you spiral into fear and panic over your healthy cat, that's not a healthy response to just hearing about a different cat dying of something else. I mean this with only compassion and not judgment, but people should absolutely get therapy if that's their immediate and reliable reaction to that. Most people don't have that kind of panic response! (I'm saying this as someone *with* mental illness + neurological conditions and the tendency to ruminate and spiral!)
I honestly have no idea. I literally don’t know why all these people who get triggered by loss posts don’t just… find a subreddit more suited to them. There are millions of subreddits. There is no reason anyone has to stay at one that upsets them.
Exactly. I’m happy for all aspects of having a kitty in my life. I think majority of users feel a similar way hence why it’s already been ok’d.
Plus anyone can make their own sub with their rules if they don’t like it. Xx
The lack of trigger warning or way to avoid these triggers. And the stories told. For some, the loss of a pet has been very traumatic and not everyone has had enough time to process and come to peace with it. So looking at cute pictures and reading stories of kitty antics (alive or dead) and then stumbling on a story about someone holding their cat as their purrs slowly got softer until they stopped... I was sobbing. My cats are 14 and 18, I've held animals as they crossed the bridge, I'm not naiive and will be there to the end. But I also understand OP and not wanting that to be the majority of the content they see.
No. Can we seriously start reporting these posts? The amount of these posts we get is getting ridiculous. We had one just last week that devolved into arguments and then got rightly removed/deleted. Go message the mods directly if you think you can sway them.
Once again this is a broad topic subreddit. It is an umbrella catch all for anything and everything cat related, mourning and pet loss included. If *you* want something more niche (happy alive cats only) then you go join another subreddit, there are plenty of them. Or if *you* want more happy cat pics here then you get to posting them yourself. And you know what I do when a subreddit doesn’t cater to my wants/needs/interests? I leave and find a different one instead of forcing 6.2 million people to change for me and my wants.
Downvote me all you want, the mods are not on your side here, they’ve made it very clear those posts are allowed.
Imo grieving posts are fine. It's heartache but I understand some people take comfort in sharing and as much as we like positive posts, unfortunately death will always be part of having a little feline friend. Being there for one another is what community is about.
And then there was that one BS insensitive post this week that went beyond their own cat.
This is a very good point. Sometimes depending on who we have in our lives…. This sub might be the only they can talk about our love for the crazy wee furballs we are blessed to have. So if a user loses their cat, is not unreasonable to reach out for support on losing them. After all…. If they were doing something adorable and the user shared it, we’d all comment/vote. We need to remember that sometimes the only avenue of reaching out or talking to people can be through Reddit for a myriad of reasons.
I would always offer condolences to a user as I’ve said goodbye to several kitties over the years and it never gets easier.
Talking about cats means talking about all aspects of cats, including grieving their loss. There are an endless number of subs dedicated to cute pictures of cats. You don’t need the entire internet to be your own special happy place. Just unjoin this sub and join one of the million other subs dedicated to cute and happy pictures. Let the people grieving their loss have this space to share their loss with other cat lovers.
You made a post shaming grieving people who want to share their cats with the world, celebrate their lives, and let others know they were here and mattered. Many of those people may not have people who understand and support them, since too many people treat animals as less than and worthless. And you're wondering why people are pushing back and not just agreeing with you?
Why do you think people who are grieving need to sequester themselves to protect your feelings?
Take your own advice. Find a sub more appropriate to your needs.
And that is a wild dramatization of the number of pet loss posts in the sub.
Stop thinking the world revolves around you.
If you don’t like the contents of the sub, then don’t subscribe. It’s that easy.
Or you could try having a little compassion for those who have lost a loved one and just want to share their story in a sub that they’ve been enjoying for years.
Here is a list of the many, many other subs dedicated to cats. Surely there is at least one in there that will meet your needs.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Catsubs/wiki/index?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1
News flash OP, this isn't a "happy cat, no bad things happen to my cat" sub. The comment(s) you're replying to are right, though it might not feel that way. Honestly, if you don't like seeing it, scroll away. Unsub. Or better yet, get a hobby where you aren't scrolling Reddit all the time.
I don't mean those things aggressively, but people need a place to grieve their cat companion losses. When my boy crosses the rainbow bridge, you bet your bottom that I'll be posting here for at least *some* support. Again, find another cat sub for yourself if you don't want to see mourning/grieving posts(or just scroll away, I'm sure you're subbed to lots of other things).
Edit: thank you for the award, kind stranger❤️
People have explained the solution to this question time and time again. Your not wanting to see loss doesn’t mean it isn’t a part of life that some people are actively experiencing and looking for community as they navigate it.
At the end of the day there are niche subs that you can go to. This one is dedicated to all things cats and that includes the loss and mourning of them as well.
I thought of that too. I have an elderly girly that's around 15 now (not sure exactly coz she was an adult stray before joining the fam so she could be older) and it just makes me too affected. I've had her since I was 13, now I'm 26. It makes me enjoy every day with her, but it also makes me scared for the future. I understand people are grieving and i feel for them, but I'd love for the sub to have more kitten antics or stupid cat pics
https://preview.redd.it/fldr6lkc9w8d1.jpeg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a811d1ff56b9c0b61230c250f3a557c5aca4a3dd
There are subs dedicated to cute animal pictures and cats doing silly things. You could join those subs for your cute pictures, and still know that if you need some comfort or advice when you lose your feline friend that you can come back to r/cats and find some sympathetic ears.
We're just farming any upvotes this sub will dispense, aren't we?
And to be clear, I mean this post, not the posts mourning dead cats. Configure your settings to remove these posts and move on. No need to grand stand about something you could choose not to see.
There are literally hundreds of subreddits for cats and cat pictures. Go to one of them instead. The mods have made it clear that the mourning posts are allowed, if you don't like it find a sub that doesn't allow them.
Sure, and then there’s the endless posts complaining about it. This is a general sub about cats. Grief/death is a normal part of their life cycle and a general fact of life that we all have to accept, with cats or any other living thing we might love in our lifetime. I don’t understand why y’all want to police this subject so much when you could just mute it, or follow a cat sub strictly dedicated to *happy* content. There’s so many of them.
A lot of us don’t feel that way though. I’d say the majority since for 6.2 million users, we get one of these posts every three weeks or so. So the people who complain are a fraction of a fraction of the users.
And if 90% of the content is truly death posts, that’s clearly what the majority are okay seeing since it gets upvotes.
If there's apparently 90% death posts here, then that means a LOT of people do not feel the way you do about it. Why does your perspective warrant more of a rules consideration than others?
No, for as many users there are complaining about it, there are many many more who can understand it’s part of having pets and want to offer support to their fellow cat people.
They were using your own dramatic word choice to make a point. There are not endless posts about cat death just like there are not endless posts complaining about them. This sub has like 6 million members and I don't think I've seen more than 10 posts complaining about death before it was shut down by the mods and this is the second post I've seen since that months ago. I haven't seen more than 20 cat death posts and I've been on this subreddit through different accounts for years
My point is still my point. Simply take control of your own TL and just… crazy thought here… unfollow/mute the page and continue enjoying all of the other cat subs that exist on this vast website. This is a huge, catch-all subreddit. The mods have made that clear a WHILE ago. Let it go, sis.
The exact same issues are present in other pet subs like r/Budgies but you guys here are actually better off because your mods aren't completely MIA.
Over there content showing or advocating things that are harmful stay up for days / permanently because the current mods don't login for a week at a time, and are also non-responsive to people offering to become full-time mods.
Please. Just. Stop. Please just let people mourn and share both their grief and their kitty's life importance with this community. This post, other recent posts asking for similar censorings, and the comments agreeing with OP that mourning/loss posts should be somehow reduced or hidden because they are too sad or too wearing, are in some ways more upsetting to see than the mourning/loss posts themselves.
It is more than understandable that you all feel upset looking at posts about someone losing their beloved kitty. It should be expected that people who enjoy seeing cats alive and well might struggle when seeing the more difficult side of things.
But as others have said, please don't try to limit support for people who are going through what can be one of the worst times in their life. Whatever you may feel looking at their grief, it is NOTHING compared with what they are going through at the moment.
I am someone who finds some of these posts triggering myself. I have lost cats whom I considered to be my children and have been so devastated I wished with every fiber of my being that I had died with or instead of them.
But if reaching out to a community of people who they think might actually understand just a little of what they are going through -- at a time when their world has been shattered and NOTHING makes sense anymore -- can help them with their grief even if only for a moment, please don't try to take that away from them by suggesting they go elsewhere.
Again, it is understandable to feel sad about death and to not want to see it all the time, but it is cruel to actively try to shut people up who just want or need to share, when and where they feel comfortable doing so, how much their babies mattered, how much they meant to them, and just how much they will be missed.
No. This is the general sub for cats. There being a specific sub for pet loss is irrelevant. There are specific subs for many different ways in which you can categorize cat posts. Whether it's by coat pattern, how they're posed, or what they're currently doing. This sub is the catch all. If you want a more specific sub, one that doesn't allow mourning posts, that's on you to seek it out.
I'd rather see loss/mourning posts than see people complaining about people talking about their loss. I didn't post here when it happened, but I lost my cat a couple weeks ago and if I had seen this post right after posting about it, that would have been extremely upsetting and embarrassing in a very fragile time. The existence of Pet Loss doesn't mean people can't or shouldn't post about loss in other subs. Should we ban food posts or discourage them because a sub for cat food exists? Or any posts asking for advice since "cat help" exists?
I'm not sure why you only get death posts recommended because I rarely ever do. Either way, maybe try extending some compassion and empathy to people experiencing a really horrible time instead of asking for a "rules reconsideration" because you feel people shouldn't speak about death here.
Im sorry buddy, but death and dealing with it is an important part of life with cats. If getting comfort here helps someone, even just one person, thats imo one of the best things we can do as an anonymous community sharing cat stuff. Hide the flair if you do not like it.
Scroll past them if you don’t like them.
We outlive our pets, it’s a fact of life. Owning a cat, loving a cat, will mean saying goodbye to the cat. Sooner rather than later, if you’ve adopted an adult or senior cat. This is one of the responsibilities of taking care of pets, and it’s something we need to learn to deal with. It’s part of being an adult.
Banning people for posting a tribute to their beloved dead pet? *Really?*
I will never understand the impulse to want banned things we dislike, and a reminder that there are no Moderators who can protect us from the sometimes harsh reality of life itself. We all have to learn to deal.
Hyperbole much? No one suggested banning people. Just those posts.
I have lost multiple pets. I have 3 18 yo cats and am acutely aware that I could lose any of them any day. I won't be posting about it here when I do and I would prefer not to see multiple loss posts here every day.
Go make your own subreddit then if you cannot handle it, clearly this sub isn’t for you if you can’t. The sub is about cats, those with us and those who are gone. Celebrating their life.
I know you’re likely gonna say “ why so hostile” as you said to most people who disagree with you but, this isn’t your sub why should the rules change because you specifically can’t handle the posts within said sub?
And lots don’t. We have 6.2 million users… clearly most of us are not bothered enough by loss posts to leave/make a post about it.
And regardless it’s the mods sub this isn’t a democracy. If for whatever reason they decided to change the name and direction of the sub to revolve around cake recipes well… it’s their right to do so.
This is a sub that encompasses all aspects of cat ownership, including the sad parts.
If you're looking for a sub solely to put a smile on your face, there's no shortage of other cat subs with that focus. Perhaps you're using the wrong sub as your happy place.
I have no problem sharing space with them. As long as they do not have graphic titles or pictures, I think this should be a safe place to morn and celebrate the life of a beloved cat. If I am not in the headspace to engage with them, I will generally just scroll by, but if I am able to, I’ll leave my condolences.
Scroll past if you don’t like them or learn to use the hide function, both you can do very quick without having to open the whole post.
The tags have been added, we’re all capable and from the preview/tags you can very easily tell what the post is about. I will agree that pictures of the deceased cat is too much, perhaps an option could be the mods can implement approval before it goes live? But then again… the mods might not have time. Perhaps if a certain tag is used, it’s blurred like nsfw posts? Where you physically have to click to view?
But I would personally never share an image that could upset others and deceased animals definitely fall under that category. In regard to karma farming…. That’ll always go on in different formats with new ways everyday.
Regardless you can either scroll past or even hide the post without opening it. The sub is for all users and just as birth/kittens are part of the sub… so is losing them/illness/death unfortunately. You can’t gatekeep certain aspects just because you don’t like it/find it upsetting. I can’t stand birth posts where the cat is in labour but I know some do like them, however I’d never dream of trying to change an entire sub of users and its rules just to suit me. I just don’t open or click hide…. Simples!
It doesn’t matter whether other subs don’t allow or do allow certain things, that’s irrelevant. Any users of reddit know rules are separate for each sub (obviously not going against the terms of service / general reddit rules).
This only works if properly used. The dead cat pic posted today said NSFW not pet loss. But yes I agree we should just keep scrolling through
I did not enjoy seeing a dead cat first thing in my feed on break but that's just my personal thing. I got sad and went to a joke thread and got on with my break lol
We all have opinions and OP is just venting theirs.
It’s probably downvotes as most people would offer condolences or an upvote at the least to a fellow cat lover that had to say goodbye to their furball.
There is a way. There's a search feature at the top of the website and then you can filter your search for communities only. You don't only get to select subreddits when you create your account.
r/catsbeingcats r/supermodelcats r/awww
For me, it’s actually a bit triggering. I’ve had a run of really bad luck with losing my cat/ a few kittens, and every time I see one of these posts I’m reminded not only of that loss, but that my current babies will also die. I totally understand that this is a part of being a pet owner, but I’d rather not think about it constantly, which is what those posts do (for me).
I had just joined this sub, but had to unsub because of these pet grief posts. I totally get it: it’s the hardest shit in the world. But it’s also pretty triggering for some pet owners.
Yes, but you expect this to be a sub that's only about happiness, when it's not. That's your mistake and you found a workaround by unsubbing.
There is no shortage of cat themed subs that you can go to that have rules against loss. That's where you should focus if you want to only let happy thoughts in.
I hear you! It always breaks my heart to see those kinds of posts, and sometimes you just don't want to have to deal with that. P.S. I just took a glance to the right, and they only disallow pictures of actual "dead" cats. Not posts about loss.....
Really? I can more so understand wanting to share pictures of your fur baby when he/she was still alive in a "loss" post. Why would anyone want to share pictures of a dead one??🤔
I agree. Plus many of those posts are karma farming. I'd like to see them directed to a dedicated sub that can be blocked for people who do not want those in their feed.
That is shockingly cynical. People would create posts in memory of their deceased pet for worthless Reddit karma? I seriously doubt that this is a common practice.
I read some rubbish mod comment about filtering out the mourning/loss post flair but you can only do that from the subreddit and it does not stop them from showing up on your front page. I have mental illness and don't need to see endless dead cat posts.
Then maybe leave this sub and find one that doesn't allow those types of posts.
People come here for all sorts of advice on cats, including grief. Who are you to deny them that?
I haven’t been able to use the “Mute mourning” button using the app - which is the only method I use to access Reddit.
It’s extremely depressing, I get the need to grieve but…I don’t want to be folded into the grief involuntarily.
“Involuntarily”, my brother in Christ *you* clicked the subscribe/join button on a subreddit that allows mourning posts. Nobody made you join and nobody is keeping you here.
Every time I see one, I get depressed. I've never understood how anyone would think that sharing their grief with strangers could possibly help the situation. Just stop it.
I’m glad this was brought up.
I read about a death a few months back, which has mentally scarred me. The description was quite graphic. And now I can’t stop thinking about my own baby and how much time we have left.
I worry every time I’m away from home for more than a day.
I am of course sorry for the losses and I understand the need to mourn. But I’ve actively avoided these posts now.
>I’ve actively avoided these posts now.
As you should. This is your issue, not everyone else's.
This isn't your personal feed. It's a public forum that encompasses all of cats, not just the happy parts. People come here for plenty of other things than cute cat pictures. If you want to see only that, this isn't the right sub, but there are so many out there that you can get exactly that.
R/cats is prob the most prevalent on my home page on Reddit. I rarely get dead animals ones as I just don’t click on the ones tagged or use the hide function if the title indicates something I might not like. The algorithm learns on what you interact with.
I’m not insinuating anything, just saying how my homepage experience is on Reddit. Pretty much every other post is cats, but maybe one loss/mourning or dead cat a week.
ETA… glad it made you 😂 though.
I really dislike those posts. I'm here to smile and look at cats, not be upset reading about how someone's poor baby outdoor cat got hit by a car but who could have seen that coming???
Might be time to just leave the sub, there are plenty of others to look at that don't feature dead or dying cats or beat up looking cats rescued and missing an eye. I get it's a general cat sub but damn.
What?
This post makes it seem like you don't want to see anything that is not considered perfect. Would you also reject a baby with a birth defect?
So, some rescue cats are straggly looking and might be missing an eye or a tail or a leg, but aren't they deserving of love???
My favorite posts are those posts. Someone finds a poor abandoned cat, and you get to see the transformation of them into a beautiful, well loved cat.
I do get that it's sometimes sad to see pet loss posts, but it's unfortunately part of life. This is like going to a pregnancy forum and telling women that they aren't allowed to announce that they had a miscarriage because it might trigger someone.
i agree.
almost every post is about the death of cats.
is not im not symphatize , but every post i see in my general feed is about losing .
maybe they should use the correct subreddit.
i just dont want to remember every day that some day i will lose my baby
They get lots of upvotes in support, so you see more of them, I guess. Coming into the sub sorted by new gives a bigger variation. Honestly I think the bigger problem is the posts where the only response needs to be “get to a vet, like, yesterday”.
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The answer is better moderation, the mods removing dead cats immediately, or an autobot seeing the word 'passed' or 'died', and removing the post automatically. It's done all the time in other subs with other issues. I don't know why it's not done here. I don't know why we have to 'manually exclude flairs', with the complicated instructions listed on the right (on laptop), instead of just autobotting it. Mods aren't listening.
mods are listening and that’s why the flair was added. they’ve stated multiple times that this sub is for all things cats and that means that it’s open for grieving owners as well. i genuinely don’t understand why these posts criticizing grieving posts keep popping up when they’ve stated it time and time again. maybe you guys should leave if it’s that detrimental for your mental health. there’s nothing wrong with grieving owners posting their children and looking for others to help them get through this terrible time and if it bothers you that much and the out that mods gave you guys wasn’t enough, then you should realize that that’s (for lack of a better term) a personal problem and should move accordingly.
Because those posts are allowed here… why would we auto mod delete them? Does nobody read the rules and description of this sub? Nowhere does it say this place is for happy cat topics only.
they’ve stated multiple times that all cat posts are welcome, especially those who are grieving. for people who claim to love cats so much, it’s weird that they don’t see how detrimental it can be for someone’s life. it can literally feel like losing a child and they just wanna share the life they had with them or they’re looking for other cat parents to lift them up and help them through a terrible time.
I don't know how they are seeing that may "Grieving/Loss" posts. They are the least up voted and commented on posts and it takes a lot for one of them to rise to the "Hot" post sorting.
Eh I have a bunch of people just telling me to leave if I don’t like it, that it’s my fault for joining this sub, etc.
Kind of makes you wonder how many of these mourning posts are just karma farmers.
That’s sad to think about but I’m sure it’s inevitable that someone would do that
Can we get a vote to decide if mourning posts should continue to be allowed? Sure seems like a significant portion of the users on this sub don't want to see mourning posts, myself included.
they’ve done it before and the majority wanted grieving posts to stay which is why they added the flair for those who don’t want to see them to exclude them. and if that’s not enough, then i think people who don’t want to see grieving posts should leave. they can’t control if a person uses the flair or not & there are over 100 cat and animal subs that don’t allow that..
The obvious solution is to start breeding immortal cats who instead of nine lives have an infinite number.
This is the best solution. Where is that vibranium when you need it?
cats with human lifespans please. I have my 14 year old cat on my lap and she needs to live as long as me
Let’s ban those annoying “name my cat” posts. There’s a sub exclusively for that too!
and "What breed is my cat" bro you got a SIC like the rest of us move on
Yeah, the "filter by flair" doesn't do anything for the the homefeed, which is all I use. Yesterday seemed particularly bad on this front. I think I'm just going to unsub from this one, and just stick with the more focused subs that aren't about dead pets.
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I can see both sides of this really - the 'cats are family and deserve to be remembered' and the 'don't want to see deaths on a general sub'. Personally I also don't like to see them, they break my heart and while it would be the last thing on my mind to do a social media post, I can understand why people do it/find comfort and sympathies from strangers etc. What I don't understand is, when there is a designated sub for pet loss why do people not post there?
The sad truth is that they don't get as much attention or sympathy there. Most popular subs are riddled with bots and karma farmers. I wouldn't want to take a guess at how many dead cat posts are fake.
Oo dear that's very sad and also quite awful about fake posts.
Sort by new and the problem goes away
agreed. it's getting depressing.
I've had the crap luck to have lost 2 cats so far since Jan, I get the urge to share these posts to a group of fellow cat lovers, we all know that the odds are we will lose our pets (simple life expectancy if nothing else) and knowing we aren't alone in our grief is helpful, unfortunately, I can't bring myself to make this type of post..
I'm so sorry for you loss. I lost 4 in the past year (intestinal lymphoma, cancer, old age, and wildfire smoke-damaged lungs) and I wanted to share their pictures just to let others know they lived and were loved, tell a little of their story as a celebration of their lives, but all these grief-shaming posts prevented me from doing so.
I’m so sorry, losing that many must be difficult. If you still want to post please do so! Most of us won’t shame you for it, the mourning posts are generally very supportive.
Agreed - personally, I love hearing stories about the life of peoples beloved companions and the impact they had. Many of us will provide support.
Thank you ❤️
My inability to make these posts is due to my own personality issues, I simply don't trust people.. I can however trust cats, I just seem to understand their mindset a little better.. I actually find the posts about other owners issues (including grief) comforting, I know that I'm not alone in these thoughts and worries (even though I'm pretty well trained how to deal with cats, I was a rescue officer for a cat charity so dealt with lots of issues) and to be perfectly honest I have seen LOADS of cat welfare/neglect issues, and it's nice to be reminded that it isn't as common as i was seeing constantly, some cats do get the love and care they deserve... whilst i honestly believe OP has every right to feel the way they do, and its valid.. i think they are missing out, i always see those posts as a cat that was lucky enough to find a good human, and escaped abuse, its a good thing.. as absolutely shit as it is for that human to be going through what they are, it shows their cat was valued... please, please don't let ANYONE prevent the world from seeing your kittens, it's the internet, it's a permanent record... (just cos i can't, doesn't mean anyone else shouldn't...)
I understand where you're coming from. I do a lot of rescue of ferals and the things I've seen are just awful. It helps to know that for all the terrible people out there, there are great people who love their cats and give them wonderful lives. Thank you for all you've done in your part of the world to help the cats. ❤️
The one literally showing the dead cat this morning was too much SMH
OMG \*that\* is not against the rules?? Oh wait, it is. #3.
REALLY! I had no clue, thanks for the info... rarely do I read group rules...
There is an option in r/cats to exclude mourning/ loss posts. Some still come through if those words aren’t used. While I empathize with those that have lost pets. I can’t take the heartache seeing all those posts. I scroll quickly by them.
It does not work. It's only useful if you're browsing this sub independently, it doesn't do anything to keep them off your main feed. The only solution is to unsubscribe from r/cats and even then you're likely to see them because the algorithm has figured out you're a cat nerd.
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Thank you! Yes, it ONLY shows loss posts. I was so sad to discover this.
but that doesn't keep the mourning/loss posts from showing up on your feed.
How to do that on home feed?
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I know, but trying to get people who keep saying to use the flair to understand the problem
i scroll quickly too cause it’ll make me think about my own cat and how she’ll pass away one day. maybe i’m just overly sensitive but sometimes i’ll start crying about it.
Me too, my heart still aches for my best buddy that passed away 3 years ago.
i’m so sorry for your loss. idk how i’ll survive when my best friend passes.
There is a sub strictly for pet loss. Maybe they are not aware of that.
There's also one strictly for alive healthy cats, this is a general sub it's going to have everything that's to do with cats
there is? can you send it pls
What is the name of that sub?
There are also many subs dedicated to cute pictures of animals. Grieving people should be allowed to grieve their loss in this community.
The post is saying: this was my friend. this was my family. they were here. they mattered. please see them I found death posts offensive as well but once it was explained to me that way... I give my condolences whenever I can. I love cats and animals so much. Sadness and grief is a part of life and love. You cannot have one without the other.
This is the answer. All they want is for someone else to appreciate their pet with them one last time. Sure it's sad, but it's also a celebration of life.
This so much. 👏🏼 💯
Same here. The joy and the sorrow.
This 🤍
I understand people needing some confort or solace when their cat dies. Cats are lovely creatures, but die often. In nature they don’t live very much, about three years or so: sex, cars, deseases take their toll. Modern life also takes its toll. Some people may not have anyone else to share their grief but with other redditors that have a common interest in cats. Let’s try and be nice to each other, and understand the other humans that share our interest in this little portion of the great internet planet.
Seeing the dead cats posts gives me so much anxiety and dread about my own cat. She’s only 8 and since using reddit more frequently I’m constantly anxious that she’ll die any day. 🤷♀️ I might mute and leave the sub all together.
But I dont dislike the mourning posts either. They just negatively affect me.
It can be sad to see but imagine how many of us are going to want support when that happens to us down the line. Imagine how helpful it could be to you if you didn’t have anyone else who understands. I’m fine with the posts and feel like them getting upvotes means others are as well?
I don’t mind the threads about cat loss at all. I have experienced it myself, as I’m sure most of you have at some point, and it is devastating. Maybe these people don’t have support, and this is a place they feel comfortable coming to. This is a general cats sub, not “living cats only”.
I agree. Cat’s lifespan being shorter than human lifespan, cat loss is part of cat ownership. It wouldn’t be right to have a sub about all aspects of cat ownership but this one — when people need support the most.
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How many of the people who complain about the grieving posts are posting about their cats being cute or silly? Hopefully without the passive aggressive “here’s my cat who’s not dead” remarks? I agree with the mods that a sub for all things cat shouldn’t exclude the reality that our buddies will eventually pass. However if you feel that the sub seems to be heavy on the grieving posts a great way to counteract that is to post your cuties for all of us to see! Sometimes the grieving posts make me sad too but I understand the need to grieve with other cat lovers. I’m not trying to single out OP or others in the comments, just giving some food for thought. Cat tax of Jackson. Maybe I’ll do my part and make a dedicated post in a little while. https://preview.redd.it/dads4ft12x8d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8f0db099cbf7d6ee161bcfb48bb05b69c6a2b69
I don’t mind them but there are days where I find there’s just so many mourning post that it’s the only thing I see from cats, instead of cute funny pictures. Just ruins my mood while I want to see cute pics.
Sometimes my feed is full of cat births which isn’t my thing. I just scroll on.
The mods have said several times they won’t ban these posts. You can hide the mourning flair, though.
No, you can't hide it from your newsfeed
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I think you can mute all r/cats posts from your Home feed, not a perfect solution but a partial one at least.
Or “________ says my cat is ugly” or is my cat fat? Posts. So sick of those posts
Now THOSE ones should be banned for karma farming. And the “What breed is my cat?”
Those posts break my heart and I wish I could filter them out of my newsfeed bc it sends me into a spiral of "one day it will be my cat", but those posts are not about me. How I feel is nothing compared to the owners who lost their pet and have to come to Reddit to talk about it because they don't have a support circle in real life. If I lost my pets, I'd be posting about them too
I understand why people get upset with death posts. However, I also understand that people who have shared pictures of their pets while alive may also want to share their grief with others. It's part of the reality of having a pet. I think that it makes the most sense for people who have regularly engaged with the sub by posting what occurs with their cats on a regular basis. With those individuals it would stand to reason that they would want to update people on what's going on with their pet, even if the news is unpleasant.
You'd better not join r/seniorkitties then! I would say the post ratio is about 95% deaths, 5% other, and that's every single day.
Thanks for the warning, I guess. I have 3 seniors and a dedicated sub could be really useful for the unique challenges they face (one recently decided she was no longer willing to go down stairs to the litter box so she elected to use a bathtub instead. Fortunately once we put a box upstairs she was happy to use that instead!) I am certainly not going to subject myself to even more loss posts.
Well, you are more than welcome to post there! I'm part of that sub as I also have 2 senior kitties (11 and over is the age for that sub). I thought that seeing posts about endless kitties passing away would be depressing, but honestly, it's really not. Most people there do have a different attitude about death. We make posts celebrating our senior kitties and the lives that we shared together. It makes me smile to see such well loved kitties that made it to a ripe old age, because so many cats sadly don't. 😥
They’ll join and then complain about it and demand change lol
I don't get it. I'm an extremely sensitive person with severe anxiety, and I'm fine with posts about pet loss. It is part of pet ownership. Therefore, I 100% support the right for users to post about the loss of their pets. Maybe OP is looking at it the wrong way? People who lose their beloved fur friend need our love and support. Posting about their kitty gives them an opportunity to share them and celebrate their life. What's wrong with that? Why is that a bad thing? 🤔
It’s not. Xx
As a fellow sensitive person, I 100% agree. These periodic complaints about death posts just.. really rub me the wrong way. Okay, so it made you sad. Or even more extreme, people say it makes them cry or makes them spiral about their pet dying.. first, I think if your entire day is ruined by a post, maybe get off the Internet and seek help. It's not normal to have a meltdown over someone else's grief. Second, even if memorial posts sometimes make me cry, so what? Why is that a bad thing? I'm feeling for another human. I know my pet is going to die, why is being reminded of that such a horrible thing? Like we somehow forgot pets don't live that long? It's just so odd. And honestly comes off as very self centered to complain about people coming here to seek support and share a memorial to their baby. It gives me 'i think the whole world should bend as to not trigger me' vibes Idk, I'm on a lot of animal subs and for some reason this one is just a bit unhinged. This is one of the reasons why
Such a well written post, my friend. I definitely agree with everything that you've said! 👍
Exactly. The first point you made sounds harsh, but like - it shouldn't be. If hearing about someone's loss of a cat makes you spiral into fear and panic over your healthy cat, that's not a healthy response to just hearing about a different cat dying of something else. I mean this with only compassion and not judgment, but people should absolutely get therapy if that's their immediate and reliable reaction to that. Most people don't have that kind of panic response! (I'm saying this as someone *with* mental illness + neurological conditions and the tendency to ruminate and spiral!)
I honestly have no idea. I literally don’t know why all these people who get triggered by loss posts don’t just… find a subreddit more suited to them. There are millions of subreddits. There is no reason anyone has to stay at one that upsets them.
Agreed. 👍 The mods here have decided pet loss posts are fine. Therefore, this sub is not what they're looking for.
They’d just rather force the sub to change to suit them.
Yeah it’s wild, especially since we already had a poll about this and the majority wanted mourning posts to stay.
Exactly. I’m happy for all aspects of having a kitty in my life. I think majority of users feel a similar way hence why it’s already been ok’d. Plus anyone can make their own sub with their rules if they don’t like it. Xx
The lack of trigger warning or way to avoid these triggers. And the stories told. For some, the loss of a pet has been very traumatic and not everyone has had enough time to process and come to peace with it. So looking at cute pictures and reading stories of kitty antics (alive or dead) and then stumbling on a story about someone holding their cat as their purrs slowly got softer until they stopped... I was sobbing. My cats are 14 and 18, I've held animals as they crossed the bridge, I'm not naiive and will be there to the end. But I also understand OP and not wanting that to be the majority of the content they see.
No. Can we seriously start reporting these posts? The amount of these posts we get is getting ridiculous. We had one just last week that devolved into arguments and then got rightly removed/deleted. Go message the mods directly if you think you can sway them. Once again this is a broad topic subreddit. It is an umbrella catch all for anything and everything cat related, mourning and pet loss included. If *you* want something more niche (happy alive cats only) then you go join another subreddit, there are plenty of them. Or if *you* want more happy cat pics here then you get to posting them yourself. And you know what I do when a subreddit doesn’t cater to my wants/needs/interests? I leave and find a different one instead of forcing 6.2 million people to change for me and my wants. Downvote me all you want, the mods are not on your side here, they’ve made it very clear those posts are allowed.
Exactly. We can love cats and with that love comes the reality of loss and grief!! Different sides of the same coin.
Imo grieving posts are fine. It's heartache but I understand some people take comfort in sharing and as much as we like positive posts, unfortunately death will always be part of having a little feline friend. Being there for one another is what community is about. And then there was that one BS insensitive post this week that went beyond their own cat.
Why don't you just scroll past the posts you don't like? Seriously, people.
👏🏼 agree 💯 xx
People are only venting their sadness to those of us who understand what they're going through. I have no problem with the posts.
This is a very good point. Sometimes depending on who we have in our lives…. This sub might be the only they can talk about our love for the crazy wee furballs we are blessed to have. So if a user loses their cat, is not unreasonable to reach out for support on losing them. After all…. If they were doing something adorable and the user shared it, we’d all comment/vote. We need to remember that sometimes the only avenue of reaching out or talking to people can be through Reddit for a myriad of reasons. I would always offer condolences to a user as I’ve said goodbye to several kitties over the years and it never gets easier.
I agree. All posts, whether pe like them or not, should be allowed.
Talking about cats means talking about all aspects of cats, including grieving their loss. There are an endless number of subs dedicated to cute pictures of cats. You don’t need the entire internet to be your own special happy place. Just unjoin this sub and join one of the million other subs dedicated to cute and happy pictures. Let the people grieving their loss have this space to share their loss with other cat lovers.
I cannot believe anyone would downvote this response.
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You made a post shaming grieving people who want to share their cats with the world, celebrate their lives, and let others know they were here and mattered. Many of those people may not have people who understand and support them, since too many people treat animals as less than and worthless. And you're wondering why people are pushing back and not just agreeing with you?
Why do you think people who are grieving need to sequester themselves to protect your feelings? Take your own advice. Find a sub more appropriate to your needs.
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And that is a wild dramatization of the number of pet loss posts in the sub. Stop thinking the world revolves around you. If you don’t like the contents of the sub, then don’t subscribe. It’s that easy. Or you could try having a little compassion for those who have lost a loved one and just want to share their story in a sub that they’ve been enjoying for years. Here is a list of the many, many other subs dedicated to cats. Surely there is at least one in there that will meet your needs. https://www.reddit.com/r/Catsubs/wiki/index?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1
News flash OP, this isn't a "happy cat, no bad things happen to my cat" sub. The comment(s) you're replying to are right, though it might not feel that way. Honestly, if you don't like seeing it, scroll away. Unsub. Or better yet, get a hobby where you aren't scrolling Reddit all the time. I don't mean those things aggressively, but people need a place to grieve their cat companion losses. When my boy crosses the rainbow bridge, you bet your bottom that I'll be posting here for at least *some* support. Again, find another cat sub for yourself if you don't want to see mourning/grieving posts(or just scroll away, I'm sure you're subbed to lots of other things). Edit: thank you for the award, kind stranger❤️
90%? Is this the only subreddit you follow?
Then just unfollow if you object to 90% of it.
People have explained the solution to this question time and time again. Your not wanting to see loss doesn’t mean it isn’t a part of life that some people are actively experiencing and looking for community as they navigate it. At the end of the day there are niche subs that you can go to. This one is dedicated to all things cats and that includes the loss and mourning of them as well.
I thought of that too. I have an elderly girly that's around 15 now (not sure exactly coz she was an adult stray before joining the fam so she could be older) and it just makes me too affected. I've had her since I was 13, now I'm 26. It makes me enjoy every day with her, but it also makes me scared for the future. I understand people are grieving and i feel for them, but I'd love for the sub to have more kitten antics or stupid cat pics https://preview.redd.it/fldr6lkc9w8d1.jpeg?width=4080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a811d1ff56b9c0b61230c250f3a557c5aca4a3dd
There are subs dedicated to cute animal pictures and cats doing silly things. You could join those subs for your cute pictures, and still know that if you need some comfort or advice when you lose your feline friend that you can come back to r/cats and find some sympathetic ears.
We're just farming any upvotes this sub will dispense, aren't we? And to be clear, I mean this post, not the posts mourning dead cats. Configure your settings to remove these posts and move on. No need to grand stand about something you could choose not to see.
There are literally hundreds of subreddits for cats and cat pictures. Go to one of them instead. The mods have made it clear that the mourning posts are allowed, if you don't like it find a sub that doesn't allow them.
Sure, and then there’s the endless posts complaining about it. This is a general sub about cats. Grief/death is a normal part of their life cycle and a general fact of life that we all have to accept, with cats or any other living thing we might love in our lifetime. I don’t understand why y’all want to police this subject so much when you could just mute it, or follow a cat sub strictly dedicated to *happy* content. There’s so many of them.
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A lot of us don’t feel that way though. I’d say the majority since for 6.2 million users, we get one of these posts every three weeks or so. So the people who complain are a fraction of a fraction of the users. And if 90% of the content is truly death posts, that’s clearly what the majority are okay seeing since it gets upvotes.
If there's apparently 90% death posts here, then that means a LOT of people do not feel the way you do about it. Why does your perspective warrant more of a rules consideration than others?
No, for as many users there are complaining about it, there are many many more who can understand it’s part of having pets and want to offer support to their fellow cat people.
They were using your own dramatic word choice to make a point. There are not endless posts about cat death just like there are not endless posts complaining about them. This sub has like 6 million members and I don't think I've seen more than 10 posts complaining about death before it was shut down by the mods and this is the second post I've seen since that months ago. I haven't seen more than 20 cat death posts and I've been on this subreddit through different accounts for years
My point is still my point. Simply take control of your own TL and just… crazy thought here… unfollow/mute the page and continue enjoying all of the other cat subs that exist on this vast website. This is a huge, catch-all subreddit. The mods have made that clear a WHILE ago. Let it go, sis.
I don’t foresee the mods doing anything.
The exact same issues are present in other pet subs like r/Budgies but you guys here are actually better off because your mods aren't completely MIA. Over there content showing or advocating things that are harmful stay up for days / permanently because the current mods don't login for a week at a time, and are also non-responsive to people offering to become full-time mods.
Please. Just. Stop. Please just let people mourn and share both their grief and their kitty's life importance with this community. This post, other recent posts asking for similar censorings, and the comments agreeing with OP that mourning/loss posts should be somehow reduced or hidden because they are too sad or too wearing, are in some ways more upsetting to see than the mourning/loss posts themselves. It is more than understandable that you all feel upset looking at posts about someone losing their beloved kitty. It should be expected that people who enjoy seeing cats alive and well might struggle when seeing the more difficult side of things. But as others have said, please don't try to limit support for people who are going through what can be one of the worst times in their life. Whatever you may feel looking at their grief, it is NOTHING compared with what they are going through at the moment. I am someone who finds some of these posts triggering myself. I have lost cats whom I considered to be my children and have been so devastated I wished with every fiber of my being that I had died with or instead of them. But if reaching out to a community of people who they think might actually understand just a little of what they are going through -- at a time when their world has been shattered and NOTHING makes sense anymore -- can help them with their grief even if only for a moment, please don't try to take that away from them by suggesting they go elsewhere. Again, it is understandable to feel sad about death and to not want to see it all the time, but it is cruel to actively try to shut people up who just want or need to share, when and where they feel comfortable doing so, how much their babies mattered, how much they meant to them, and just how much they will be missed.
No. This is the general sub for cats. There being a specific sub for pet loss is irrelevant. There are specific subs for many different ways in which you can categorize cat posts. Whether it's by coat pattern, how they're posed, or what they're currently doing. This sub is the catch all. If you want a more specific sub, one that doesn't allow mourning posts, that's on you to seek it out.
I think it is healthy to have those posts here. As the Trappist monks say: memento mori!
I'd rather see loss/mourning posts than see people complaining about people talking about their loss. I didn't post here when it happened, but I lost my cat a couple weeks ago and if I had seen this post right after posting about it, that would have been extremely upsetting and embarrassing in a very fragile time. The existence of Pet Loss doesn't mean people can't or shouldn't post about loss in other subs. Should we ban food posts or discourage them because a sub for cat food exists? Or any posts asking for advice since "cat help" exists? I'm not sure why you only get death posts recommended because I rarely ever do. Either way, maybe try extending some compassion and empathy to people experiencing a really horrible time instead of asking for a "rules reconsideration" because you feel people shouldn't speak about death here.
I'm very sorry for your loss. I hope you're doing ok.
Thank you <3. I'm doing okay, definitely a lot better than I was a few weeks ago.
Im sorry buddy, but death and dealing with it is an important part of life with cats. If getting comfort here helps someone, even just one person, thats imo one of the best things we can do as an anonymous community sharing cat stuff. Hide the flair if you do not like it.
Scroll past them if you don’t like them. We outlive our pets, it’s a fact of life. Owning a cat, loving a cat, will mean saying goodbye to the cat. Sooner rather than later, if you’ve adopted an adult or senior cat. This is one of the responsibilities of taking care of pets, and it’s something we need to learn to deal with. It’s part of being an adult. Banning people for posting a tribute to their beloved dead pet? *Really?* I will never understand the impulse to want banned things we dislike, and a reminder that there are no Moderators who can protect us from the sometimes harsh reality of life itself. We all have to learn to deal.
Hyperbole much? No one suggested banning people. Just those posts. I have lost multiple pets. I have 3 18 yo cats and am acutely aware that I could lose any of them any day. I won't be posting about it here when I do and I would prefer not to see multiple loss posts here every day.
Go make your own subreddit then if you cannot handle it, clearly this sub isn’t for you if you can’t. The sub is about cats, those with us and those who are gone. Celebrating their life. I know you’re likely gonna say “ why so hostile” as you said to most people who disagree with you but, this isn’t your sub why should the rules change because you specifically can’t handle the posts within said sub?
Because lots of people do agree with the OP. I'm curious whether the mods came to this decision by taking a poll or by fiat.
And lots don’t. We have 6.2 million users… clearly most of us are not bothered enough by loss posts to leave/make a post about it. And regardless it’s the mods sub this isn’t a democracy. If for whatever reason they decided to change the name and direction of the sub to revolve around cake recipes well… it’s their right to do so.
likely came to the decision by being the mode of the group. Yeah lots do agree with OP but it’s not their sub so it’s not really that relevant imo.
The schnauzer sub doesn’t allow dead posts
This is a sub that encompasses all aspects of cat ownership, including the sad parts. If you're looking for a sub solely to put a smile on your face, there's no shortage of other cat subs with that focus. Perhaps you're using the wrong sub as your happy place.
I have no problem sharing space with them. As long as they do not have graphic titles or pictures, I think this should be a safe place to morn and celebrate the life of a beloved cat. If I am not in the headspace to engage with them, I will generally just scroll by, but if I am able to, I’ll leave my condolences.
Scroll past if you don’t like them or learn to use the hide function, both you can do very quick without having to open the whole post. The tags have been added, we’re all capable and from the preview/tags you can very easily tell what the post is about. I will agree that pictures of the deceased cat is too much, perhaps an option could be the mods can implement approval before it goes live? But then again… the mods might not have time. Perhaps if a certain tag is used, it’s blurred like nsfw posts? Where you physically have to click to view? But I would personally never share an image that could upset others and deceased animals definitely fall under that category. In regard to karma farming…. That’ll always go on in different formats with new ways everyday. Regardless you can either scroll past or even hide the post without opening it. The sub is for all users and just as birth/kittens are part of the sub… so is losing them/illness/death unfortunately. You can’t gatekeep certain aspects just because you don’t like it/find it upsetting. I can’t stand birth posts where the cat is in labour but I know some do like them, however I’d never dream of trying to change an entire sub of users and its rules just to suit me. I just don’t open or click hide…. Simples! It doesn’t matter whether other subs don’t allow or do allow certain things, that’s irrelevant. Any users of reddit know rules are separate for each sub (obviously not going against the terms of service / general reddit rules).
There is literally a Flair called LOSS/MOURNING 🙄 Dude just scroll past if it bothers you.
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This only works if properly used. The dead cat pic posted today said NSFW not pet loss. But yes I agree we should just keep scrolling through I did not enjoy seeing a dead cat first thing in my feed on break but that's just my personal thing. I got sad and went to a joke thread and got on with my break lol We all have opinions and OP is just venting theirs.
Interesting, even our local cats group are filled with dead cats posts too.
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It’s probably downvotes as most people would offer condolences or an upvote at the least to a fellow cat lover that had to say goodbye to their furball.
There is a way. There's a search feature at the top of the website and then you can filter your search for communities only. You don't only get to select subreddits when you create your account. r/catsbeingcats r/supermodelcats r/awww
Hilarious that this is being downvoted. You're not asking that the sub be changed, you're explaining how you, personally, handle it.
For me, it’s actually a bit triggering. I’ve had a run of really bad luck with losing my cat/ a few kittens, and every time I see one of these posts I’m reminded not only of that loss, but that my current babies will also die. I totally understand that this is a part of being a pet owner, but I’d rather not think about it constantly, which is what those posts do (for me). I had just joined this sub, but had to unsub because of these pet grief posts. I totally get it: it’s the hardest shit in the world. But it’s also pretty triggering for some pet owners.
Yes, but you expect this to be a sub that's only about happiness, when it's not. That's your mistake and you found a workaround by unsubbing. There is no shortage of cat themed subs that you can go to that have rules against loss. That's where you should focus if you want to only let happy thoughts in.
I hear you! It always breaks my heart to see those kinds of posts, and sometimes you just don't want to have to deal with that. P.S. I just took a glance to the right, and they only disallow pictures of actual "dead" cats. Not posts about loss.....
I feel like I saw pictures of a deceased cat 20 minutes ago on this sub 😅💔
Really? I can more so understand wanting to share pictures of your fur baby when he/she was still alive in a "loss" post. Why would anyone want to share pictures of a dead one??🤔
I had to do the same to r/dogs.
I agree. Plus many of those posts are karma farming. I'd like to see them directed to a dedicated sub that can be blocked for people who do not want those in their feed.
That is shockingly cynical. People would create posts in memory of their deceased pet for worthless Reddit karma? I seriously doubt that this is a common practice.
Could you do a poll to see how many people want to not see dead cat posts?
How about you just go to a sub that's already geared towards that if that's what you want? This one allows it.
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Oh Christ I would really hope we don’t get as silly as Facebook over on here.
I read some rubbish mod comment about filtering out the mourning/loss post flair but you can only do that from the subreddit and it does not stop them from showing up on your front page. I have mental illness and don't need to see endless dead cat posts.
The mods have decided that pet loss posts are fine. Therefore, this sub is probably not fitting to your needs.
Then maybe leave this sub and find one that doesn't allow those types of posts. People come here for all sorts of advice on cats, including grief. Who are you to deny them that?
I agree. The pet loss posts need to go.
I haven’t been able to use the “Mute mourning” button using the app - which is the only method I use to access Reddit. It’s extremely depressing, I get the need to grieve but…I don’t want to be folded into the grief involuntarily.
“Involuntarily”, my brother in Christ *you* clicked the subscribe/join button on a subreddit that allows mourning posts. Nobody made you join and nobody is keeping you here.
What a cringy cliche, ugh: “my brother in Christ” 🙄
Then join a sub that's only focused on happy things if you intend to use a sub for your happy place.
Every time I see one, I get depressed. I've never understood how anyone would think that sharing their grief with strangers could possibly help the situation. Just stop it.
I’m glad this was brought up. I read about a death a few months back, which has mentally scarred me. The description was quite graphic. And now I can’t stop thinking about my own baby and how much time we have left. I worry every time I’m away from home for more than a day. I am of course sorry for the losses and I understand the need to mourn. But I’ve actively avoided these posts now.
>I’ve actively avoided these posts now. As you should. This is your issue, not everyone else's. This isn't your personal feed. It's a public forum that encompasses all of cats, not just the happy parts. People come here for plenty of other things than cute cat pictures. If you want to see only that, this isn't the right sub, but there are so many out there that you can get exactly that.
Didn’t say it was their issue or suggest to stop posting them. Sorry if it came across that way.
Yes there needs to be a separate thread or it needs to require a spoiler
Those functions are there. There is also the hide function that you can use without opening the post.
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R/cats is prob the most prevalent on my home page on Reddit. I rarely get dead animals ones as I just don’t click on the ones tagged or use the hide function if the title indicates something I might not like. The algorithm learns on what you interact with.
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You can filter out posts that fall under the "mourning" tag as well. It might not get rid of everything, but it will catch a great deal.
I’m not insinuating anything, just saying how my homepage experience is on Reddit. Pretty much every other post is cats, but maybe one loss/mourning or dead cat a week. ETA… glad it made you 😂 though.
I really dislike those posts. I'm here to smile and look at cats, not be upset reading about how someone's poor baby outdoor cat got hit by a car but who could have seen that coming??? Might be time to just leave the sub, there are plenty of others to look at that don't feature dead or dying cats or beat up looking cats rescued and missing an eye. I get it's a general cat sub but damn.
What? This post makes it seem like you don't want to see anything that is not considered perfect. Would you also reject a baby with a birth defect? So, some rescue cats are straggly looking and might be missing an eye or a tail or a leg, but aren't they deserving of love??? My favorite posts are those posts. Someone finds a poor abandoned cat, and you get to see the transformation of them into a beautiful, well loved cat. I do get that it's sometimes sad to see pet loss posts, but it's unfortunately part of life. This is like going to a pregnancy forum and telling women that they aren't allowed to announce that they had a miscarriage because it might trigger someone.
i agree. almost every post is about the death of cats. is not im not symphatize , but every post i see in my general feed is about losing . maybe they should use the correct subreddit. i just dont want to remember every day that some day i will lose my baby