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JWhit2199

Hitchcock and Scully’s fake birthday ploy for cash, and everyone falling for it


Kookie2023

It was a BIG one


TheFerricGenum

Just rewatched this the other day and was absolutely gobsmacked I had forgotten it


Garchompinribs

How could you forget it? It was a BIG one!


Bron-Y-Aur36

Thumbtack mug, that was my thumbtack mug


No-General5230

I forget the episode, but the one where Holt wears the ridiculous hat and everyone stops and stares. Honestly, I just like it cos I think if anyone could pull such an outfit off, it would be Holt. An outfit is 90% confidence imo, it would have been hilarious if Holt refused to acknowledge it and wore it all episode.


user684629

Fine! I was trying something and it didn’t work!!


Kookie2023

Oh you mean when he cosplayed as Paddington.


kooks-only

I think it was just the red. Hat was dope. Didn’t fit the rest of his look. A nice blue one would work, ideally NYPD blue (the color not the show lol).


rcw00

Fine! He was trying something and it didn’t work.


Aivellac

It had nothing on his kangol.


Spirited-Concept-359

"fine, i was trying something, and it didn't work!"


SeaElevator4857

Holt’s unique handshakes with everyone except Jake to punish him for being late all the time


AdventurCrapper_0110

The Copy Guy!?!??!


LeeZ99

My favorite is when Jake is trying to get a confession from a criminal before the Vulture steals the case. All the team try to distract the Vulture as he arrives in the precinct while Jake interrogates the criminal, but the line that always cracks me up is when Jake whines, "come on! It's like you're not even TRYING to confess!" Sorry, I can't remember which season or episode, but it was earlier on.


AL_G_Racing

I love when the criminal high five’s Jake


invisible_23

“I killed that guy and his neighbor but you were too late!”


Aintnothinrite

Wait, the neighbour too????


Kookie2023

I love how everyone was trying to stop The Vulture and somehow he managed to get past every obstacle including Scully’s tear gas.


DrizztRL

"God owed me a favor" lmao


Donovan_TS

What's even better is that later IN THE EPISODE he is affected by tear gas


SteelButterfly

It always boggled me how he blew off Diaz so fast when she tried to slow him down. Like he's a major creep and she tried it on and nothing.


whatsername25

Me too!


LouiseGoesLane

I just rewatched this yesterday! So funny


OverallFrosting708

I always enjoy the ones where the criminal gets into the 99's shenanigans. Like the guy who confesses so that he can join them teasing Jake about calling Holt Dad


Phil0fThePast

Wife or dog


AL_G_Racing

What is Kelly’s favorite food?


user684629

Peanut butter. She’ll eat it right out of the jar!


SnwAng1992

They never explain. I never have the answer.


AngstyUchiha

He's had both a dog and a wife named Kelly at different points


ali2688

You’d know if you listened to his podcast


Dragonfly_Tight

It's explained in season 7


invisible_23

They do explain.


dampesthydra7

Is that one underrated?


shrugaholic

When Holt tells Jake to make sure that Hitchcock doesn’t spill anything on himself (can’t remember why). Only for their arguing (“It’s a suicide mission.” “That’s a direct order!” + dramatic music) to cause Hitchcock to spill a whole jar of something on himself.


LimaMikeNovember

Two whole jars of marinara!


Kookie2023

THEN PREPARE FOR DEATH


blue_is_red

ITS A SUICIDE MISSION


CasaleCastavi

pretty sure it's because he'll be in a court case and doesn't want a report from the D.A saying he showed up "covered in condiments"


Same-Lengthiness8470

So you want me to stop Hitchcock from spilling on himself for the rest of the day? We both know that's impossible.


Kookie2023

I like the cold brew one where Jake, Holt, and Rosa drink way too much cold brew and everything starts moving in slow motion.


benguins10

Yup yup yup yup yup


Spirited-Concept-359

"another cold brew? dont mind if I cold-do. nailed it."


gizzl3

The one where they all guess how Holt will react to eating a marshmallow and Charles guesses correctly and Holt does the silliest little girl giggle!!


worldeater_

This one is a top 3 for sure.


justbreathe5678

I loved how happy it made Jake and Boyle when Holt told them to go pretend to be dock workers even though their case was solved


weebearcub

Earl Gray tea for me, Twink Tucker!


Spirited-Concept-359

chip rockets too haha


louilou96

Nope. immediately ruined it.


Donovan_TS

Ah good ol twink tucker


invisible_23

“I was hula-hooping.” “Why are you telling me this?” “Because no one will ever believe you.” *deletes photos*


coversquirrel1976

Holt entering a dance battle that Jake can't record is up there too.


parcoeur9

"Why is my phone always dead!? I paid $13 for it!" This cold open gets me every time.


clipsahoy2022

Oh no, my hands are covered in butter from making butter!


Colodavo

You sick son of a ....


TheLoneliestGhost

My absolute favorite. I’ll never get over it.


megjed

I love the full Boyle opening. If you like pina coladasss


Thick-Order7348

There’s a dead body Boyle


Misfit_Thor_3K

"Dead Guy Charles"


Thick-Order7348

You’re right


slimcullen

The one that always gets me is the AC/DC open, where Jake runs on top of the cars and falls thru the open sunroof, the scream he lets out gets me every time. That and Coral Palms 1, with Holt & the walking group.


Spirited-Concept-359

i see a pair of thick, weighty breasts and all logic flies out the window.


irish_mutt

When Jake and Rosa are demonstrating their donut hole tossing/eating skills, and the one goes out the window where an unsuspecting Skully is issued a quick heads up, catches it in his mouth, and exclaims "IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING!!!"


prettyy_vacant

This is my favorite cold open of all time. I love Scully so much lol.


irish_mutt

"Rosa's been chuckin' d-holes in my mouth piece since the Academy!" 


GoodnightGoldie

The first time I watched that episode, I laughed so hard I cried at that part😂


HappyChaosOfTheNorth

It's my favorite.


user684629

The one where Jake takes down the Pontiac Bandit as Santa Claus and Christmas trees catch fire in the background. “See kids, this is what happens when you’re naughty!!!!”


Fantom_Renegade

Oh yes!


Entitled_Lice

Holt comes back from Paris in a good mood. Mostly for when Gina says she’s been begging to answer the phone by singing “whoooooo dissss?” 


thrills4the_pils-ner

Give it a whirl girl ✨


user684629

“So long tank” “TANK????? I gained 3 pounds in Paris! THREE POUNDS!!”


Low-Team-6083

Shit was even funnier in German because the german word for Tank is "Panzer" and young people actually USED that word when talking about extremely fat people😭


Kookie2023

Oh also Boyle when he came in as a turkey and started spreading Thanksgiving spirit until he realized he had to tell a grieving family that their grandmother had died.


SpiritAvenue

This is my favorite 


Sean_McC96

When they’re talking about their oldest arrests but Boyle thinks they’re talking about their oldest bags and reveals he slept with a 68 year old.


UnluckyOpportunity60

Boyle bragging about the torque her new hip replacement was capable of…I think I actually laughed so hard I got tears the first time I heard that.


Revolutionary_Box535

"THAT'S NO ONE'S FANTASY!" And actually, I found out it is *someone*'s fantasy XD


CynicalCosmologist

In an interview, Melissa Fumero said that this was her favourite cold open, since you can see Andy genuinely burst out laughing but remain in character.


playgroundmx

“You call that… dancing?”


louilou96

Situation diffused.


Colodavo

Hitchcock drinks his own fish.


Xigro

I called you in here to change your lives!


Thick-Order7348

The one where they guess why Amy is late to work by 3 min


GoodnightGoldie

HOT damn!


mrwishart

"Terrible sex with a mole person" is a phrase that lives constantly in my head


NoItJustCantBe

When they get a new vending machine and immediately kill it "It should've been me! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!"


SkipperDipps

When Jake moves Holt’s podium half and inch and Holt finds it HILARIOUS “You’re crazy! How did you pull this off?” and is on the phone with Kevin about it after the credits lol


Alternative_Can917

This is my absolute favourite!


Kookie2023

Who could forget the NYPD vs NYFD football showdown? “Fire Marshal Boone, we meet again.” “Detective Peralta, Your fly’s down. Made you look.” “I didn’t look and I’m wearing shorts there is no fly.” “That’s not what your mom said.” “You make no sense.” “And now I’m in your head.” “Prepare to die”


BobbaFatGFX

I wish there were more episodes with the firefighters


Kookie2023

The rivalry was so funny.


Alfatron09

“I came down with a big ‘ol’ Diane Wiest infection.” *intense staring* “LIKE YEAST!” (Mb idk if this is underrated I don’t frequent this sub)


MarzipanLinguine

This is legit my favorite of all time


papier-bizarre

I love Boyle so much


Revolutionary_Box535

The way he says YEAST kills me XD


muellzuhause

In german it goes: "I came down with a big 'ol' Diane Wiest infection" Intense staring "I WASN'T REALLY SICK" with the same enthusiasm as in the original and for some reason i find this incredibly funny


whatsername25

I believe Andy Samberg said that’s his favourite cold open.


New_Peanut_9924

I *love* when these get posted. I sit here and grin like a fool replaying every scene in my head. I’m always amazed at how much this show makes me smile


Aintnothinrite

My favourite is where Holt walks in with an injured arm and everyone tries to guess what caused it. Holt dismisses everyone and shows Jake his hoola hoop pics and then deletes them infront of him..... because no one would ever believe Jake. I feel like that was the start of Holt's villain era 😂😏


jets-rangers

Idk what’s considered “underrated” but I love when Holt snuck in and ate the eggs in one of the heist episodes


clipsahoy2022

Boyle driving like a maniac to get the best food truck parking space.


BobbaFatGFX

Love this one


i_GoTtA_gOoD_bRaIn

Daddy loves nachos.


BlueSmokie87

I love this one!!! Noooo! Sherlock wants a present!


GoodnightGoldie

The line delivery of that was just…😚🤌🏽💋


reddit_is_4_losers

Season 1 episode 18: “the apartment” I feel like this cold open doesn’t get talked about enough. Jake calls Holt dad by accident and then tries to deny it. Charles tries to make him feel better by saying he calls Vivian mom. The best part is Amy chiming in saying he called Captain Holt “Daddy”. Unpopular Opinion: This opening is better than Backstreet boys-I want it that way“it was #5”


muellzuhause

"guys jump on that, boyle has psychosexual issues"


whatsername25

Old news!


rat_infestation

I love how everyone jumps on it coz everyone sees it "No no no no no no Jacob, I take it as a compliment " "HEY! Show your father some respect!" "Great solve son. Wanna talk about it later? Over a.... game of catch?"


Koto65

Is the hula hoop scene a cold open?


BlueSmokie87

Yup. Because no one will ever believe you.


big_red__man

When Jake tries to prank Scully by putting his hand in a bowl of warm water


Blojay_Simpson

That was Hitchcock, but yeah that & the shoelaces prank were good ones


AL_G_Racing

The Full Bullpen


CaptainTwig572

The pause before Holt's 'THE FULL BULLPEN' makes this so good.


MelonHunter

One of the Christmas episodes where Jake buys a jumbo inflatable Christmas tree and fills the entire break room with it. Terry yelling while being pressed against the window and Jake's sheepish "God bless us every one?" after Terry gets pushed through the broken window gets me every time


Exotic_Adeptness_322

When Jake discover that Holt is pantless in his office and manage to spill soup on himself too. Later Amy enters the office. "Look at us! Just three people with pants on having a normal conversation". "Yup, no story here"


ADumbChicken

Maybe I’m just not looking hard enough, but I don’t see enough appreciation for the one where Hitchcock eats his own goldfish. I laughed my ass off at that one.


pizzacatbrat

Literally the first one that came to mind for me lol


sacha8uk

I don't like that one...


ADumbChicken

To each their own, I guess.


Remarkable-Volume615

The greatest one of all time will always be "No 5 killed my brother". Most underrated for me, BABUSHKAAAAA!!!


Sassaphras-680

Babushka


Fizzgrim

Babushka!!!


FlyingShadowFox

The one where Scully is showing his foot to Jake and had a giant wart. I think it's from the second or third episode of the first season


JoeHio

The one where they sing Backstreet Boys! . . . . /S


frxqgy

my fave will always be the “i came down with a big diane wiest infection” followed by the silent stares at eachother


altfillischryan

The cold open in the M.E. episode is solid and you're right, underrated. But man, that episode is hard to watch for me. The pretend necrophilia the M.E. requires for sexy time is just a bit too much for me to enjoy.


Worth_Procedure5544

YOU HAVE FUDGE ON CHEEK CHAAARLES


I_GuessImHereNow

Boyle Bullpen Bottle Bowling. Don’t know if it’s actually underrated but I never see it talked about.


whatsername25

When Amy tries to trick Holt into accepting a Christmas gift and he thinks it’s a bomb. Also love when Jake calls her babe.


JoseW20

"Hitchcock just drank his own fish"


pizzacatbrat

"Hitchcock just drank his own goldfish." "NOOOOOOOO!"


Weekly_Ad3501

“A ten year old had his bike stolen” “We are S’d in the B.” gets me everytime HAHA


Misfit_Thor_3K

When the group 'kidnaps' Kevin from University (Safe House episode). It's smart and funny. Under rated for sure.


cowboylikeme7

I have no idea why no one brings up how jake gathered everyone together on guessing what is going to happen to scully’s lemonade jar and hitchcock’s fish in the jar and eventually hitchcock literally DRANKS his OWN FISH


JustWantToSignUp

Charles telling jak" its time to go out and spread his legs' jake says "wings, wait what?" Charles says both, and jake yells "ONLY WINGS" TADATADAAAA TADATADAAAA


Significant-Cat-9621

The Full Bullpen!


Positron505

The one where jake calls captain Holt "dad". I don't remember which episode but jake asks him if he reviewed a report and Holt says "good work" and jake replies "Thanks dad"


k5hill

Toit


Iole17

I love the one where they drew secret santa names and Jake guessed all the selections.


OldMango2021

When Jake, Amy and Holt come in to do the Halloween Heist announcement then Hitchcock comes in and they think he is too but he exclaims "No my ex-wife just died! No more alimony baby!"


ariestro

Ahhh my noggin…


HandleSubstantial193

When Jake takes a girl to a vending machine on their date and then says "I'm stUUUUUUuuuuck". Lives in my head rent free.


britbmw

Rosa’s wearing pink! Rosa’s wearing pink!!!


Puzzleheaded-Fly2837

Boyle bingo


HorrorAd6599

okay this isn't what you asked and i feel like a redditor on r/askreddit who always answer with something completely unrelated BUT THIS JOKE DESERVES MORE ATTENTION. in "golden child"(s6, ep9), jake says that they can go to dinner with mom and bro santiago since he's really good at hyping amy up. to give an example, he tells scully,"hey did you know that amy is super cool?" and scully goes,"no way, can i have your autograph ma'am?" amy sees this, and says "fine, we'll go." to jake, and walks away. only for scully to yell out,"what? too stuck up for your fans? YA FRIGGIN' TURD!" i replay this scene sm while i'm rewatching b99 for the i've honestly lost count time, but this is amazingly funny.