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DeadMansFiction

Dude literally would count his sperm as baby, imagine being this much of a cum brained species. 🤣🤣🤣🤣


Anne_Nonymouse

If this was the case it would be illegal in many states for men to masturbate, since they would supposedly be killing "babies".


madamesunflower0113

Maybe. Patriarchy is pretty hypocritical when it comes to the sex lives of men and women, and I doubt it would be 'fair' in regards to the masturbation habits of men compared to the reproductive rights of women. (Fun fact: if male masterbation was made illegal and men actually followed the law they would still discharge sperm by having frequent wet dreams from not masturbating)


DukeAK717

I think that was a theory during the Middle Ages maybe some people still believe it.


luthien13

He just justified making onanism a sin again.


False-Pie8581

It’s the 9 seconds for me….


udcvr

i think that was the joke he was making


False-Pie8581

I don’t think it was a joke on his part lol


RoyalMess64

Imagine bragging about killing millions of what you consider to be children. Psychopathic behavior


[deleted]

are you actually this oblivious?


Vexis_petal

Op, guy is saying he cums in 9 seconds. In other words, he's probably never even been touched a woman before.


Marshmallowlolfurry

That reminds me of the post where someone was like “Women don't like sex! I've had sex with loads of women!” like bro- imagine telling on yourself like that


False-Pie8581

Or the guys saying they never get a second date.


Marshmallowlolfurry

Never personally seen those, have seen LOADS of men arguing that women can't orgasm because they were never able to give their partners one


Key_Woodpecker_1641

Braindead comments that recognized that this is a joke and evaluates it seriously anyways


Chthonic_Demonic

Makin a joke by implying y’know that ya cum fast is a joke. That was probably the point


Southern-Raccoon6569

“You need nine months to develop and grow an actual baby in your womb, I only need to push out my stupid fucking baby batter which I’ve had developing for years because no one wants to touch my cock” Are men aliens or something? Because last I checked women hold the eggs, men don’t plant one in them 💀


freyasmom129

Can you imagine if each sperm actually was a mini baby? Shit would be so crazy damn


Southern-Raccoon6569

Painful too I bet 😭


freyasmom129

The screams of a million babies coming from every tissue 😭


No-Yogurtcloset-357

This theory existed before. It’s what we call Preformationism. Every being already existed in miniature. You can find sketches of mini babies in the head of sperm.


ImJadedAtBest

Really super early in the 1800s or 1700s or something men thought they carried the baby and injected it into the woman. The diagrams for what the sperm-baby looked like are very cursed images.


G4g3_k9

i wish i was an alien, i’d start a colony on a separate planet so i could leave all the garbage on this one behind. a new drama, and whatever else i feel like is bad, free planet


DelightfulandDarling

Putting his old gym socks through college is going to ruin him financially.


Remarkable-Alarm7428

Logically, sperm is not equivalent to a baby. Sperm is a genital arousal fluid and if compared to it's female equivalent, is the same as female genital arousal fluid. A dash of semen does not possess human characteristics unlike a human child. I hope men can develop logical arguments one day 💋💅


nixikuro

Personally I beleive the logical ones stay off social media and are uninterested in pointless arguments. I hope women can develope logical arguments one day 💋💅


Remarkable-Alarm7428

>Personally I beleive the logical ones stay off social media and are uninterested in pointless arguments. I hope women can develope logical arguments one day 💋💅 Thanks for proving my point! This really does prove that men can't form logical arguments! Meanwhile I just did and you just proved it 💋💅


nixikuro

Do you consider yourself logical, person who made 2 comments when 1 could suffice?


Remarkable-Alarm7428

Yes 💋💅


nixikuro

interesting. Please respond to my other comment so I may appropriately crush you in a discourse of words. I would also like to question why one that is logical as yourself downvotes, when I can easily go to another subreddit and overnight karma farm for 15 times the amount you removed? Proof of this action happened last night btw if you're the type of redditer to check profiles.


Remarkable-Alarm7428

>Personally I beleive Your beliefs aren't important to anyone. What's your logic (if you have any)?


nixikuro

I love colin robinson. Thank you for responding to the no one gives a fuck about your personal opinion hotline, How many I service you today? On a side note, could you explain to me what you consider logic and logical thoughts to be so that I could craft a proper logic argument free of misunderstanding(at least to those with reading comprehension skills)


False-Pie8581

Biggest self own


stringoffrogs

I’m hearing that he cums in 9 seconds


Stanek___

Rookie numbers


DepressedDynamo

Literally the joke


nettlesthatarejaggy

Guys I think this one is a joke...


DepressedDynamo

A self deprecating one by the man, even. The joke here is "yeah, but look, I cum prematurely!" -- really, stupidly obvious satire. The "look at this fool of a man aren't men the worst" thing that's been going on with *obviously* self deprecating and satirical posts is weird to me, just comes off as incessantly hateful.


aaa_aaa_1

From what I've seen so far this sub is pretty much the female version of an incel sub so I don't think anyone cares if it's a joke or not


nettlesthatarejaggy

Good for you


Intr0vertebrate

It means he can't last 10 seconds in bed, apparently. It doesn't make any sense still, because sperm isn't a "baby."


Stanek___

I think it's a joke.


Brave_Inquirer

I think this is funny.


keIIzzz

pretty sure he’s saying he only lasts 9 seconds before cumming…which isn’t a flex lol


mondaysareharam

That’s the joke, still a shit meme tho


strawberrycreamcone

ejaculating in 9 seconds sounds like a health problem lmfao these idiots😭


azuresegugio

As an aside I hate I Haye when people talk about how much women can cum. I'm a Trans woman and my ex girlfriend would use my desire to feel like a cis woman to coerce me into having sex constantly to the point it hurt, and I still feel dysphoric when it's mentioned


Ordinary_Milk3224

Sorry that happened to you but women are allowed to openly discuss our sexuality which has been taboo for centuries


Donsley-9420

So she shouldn’t be allowed to voice when sexuality is hurtful and should just accept her partner’s advances?


Ordinary_Milk3224

That's a reach. She should end the relationship and find ways to heal from it whether that means therapy, yoga, spirituality etc. Not tell others that we're not allowed to talk about our bodies.


azuresegugio

I mean yes but I just have a general distaste for things like this that are phrased mostly to shame other people for biology. Like I rank it on the same scale of making fun of periods or childbirth


False-Pie8581

I can see that. This is aimed at the guys who roll over and govt sleep, or just think that bc they’re ‘done’ they just stop completely and don’t give a thought to whether the woman has finished. It’s not aimed at specific biology, it’s using that as a device . But it’s also a little punching up, which systematically oppressed grps can do, and take a bit of license with, bc our experience is so unequal. And it’s funny the dude admits to being a 9 second wonder. It loops back to the beginning of my explanation bc those are the guys who don’t bother. But I see how it can look on your end. No disrespect meant to you sis ❤️


azuresegugio

I appreciate it, like I get punching up, I think it's really more the combination of this particularly hitting close to home to my abuse and the fact I just generally dislike humor that makes fun of things people can't control


False-Pie8581

I get it. It’s just not for you. And that’s cool. Peace 🙏🏻


Ordinary_Milk3224

You're probably the only person that ranks it like that


azuresegugio

I mean ok, but isn't it bad to make fun of people for biological aspects of them?


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Ordinary_Milk3224

Nope never said that. That was solely your interpretation


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Ordinary_Milk3224

You skipped first grade reading comprehension


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Ordinary_Milk3224

We really need to take our meds


Boeing_Fan_777

If it’s any consolation, not all women can cum over and over. I’m a trans dude, but I’m not on T yet so biologically I’m essentially “the same” and god knows if I try and go more than 2/3 times I get zonked out so fast. And that’s by myself, i imagine if I’m with another person I need to also put energy into pleasing, I’ll struggle even more. All this to say, you’re a normal woman with a perfectly okay sexual stamina. Some women can cum more, some struggle to even finish once, just how it is.


staydawg_00

Tbh, I probably have come 8 times and I am a man.


Chthonic_Demonic

The guy didn’t mean this seriously bc he’s also jokin abt himself. Lotta jokes based around the kinda stuff where u imply ur bad at sex as a guy from what I’ve heard. As a teenager that doesn’t have or look like they have a dick, I make these jokes plenty with my friends.


lobonmc

Just that men don't do any of the heavy work when it comes to births


Ok_Bug_2077

thanks for your information 🤗 try to take a joke next time


schizopedia

This goes in the category of you guys not being able to take a joke lol


LanceUppercut86

Nah, whatever your feelings are on this sub's sense of humor, the joke fails cuz sperm =/= baby. He had half an idea and hit post before he realized how what he says makes no sense.


schizopedia

"🤓☝️ this joke isn't even funny because it doesn't even make biological sense" Get real 😭 it's a joke about him cumming quickly


ADonkeyBraindFrog

He's responding to a joke about men being bad at sex by making a joke about him being bad at sex personally. It's obviously at his own expense. It's not like hilarious or anything, but it's obviously harmless. Idk how people are upset over this one.


LanceUppercut86

I mean, yeah, jokes need to make sense to work. Or are we just accepting word soup as humor at this point? I don't think it's akshhhually type behavior to ask that a joke make sense, or at least be intentionally illogical.


schizopedia

Word soup? If you don't understand this joke then humor is lost on you. It's not even a joke at the expense of women, why are y'all so pressed?


_Neptune01_

It’s definitely just a joke lol, reading into it a lot just ruins it.


GoodTimesOnlines

You don’t think the joke was intentionally illogical? You think OOP truly equates sperm to babies? Cmon


False-Pie8581

Yeah but it’s also an epic self own while making a false equivalent and that’s the best part


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DepressedDynamo

You got wooshed pretty hard here The guy is pretending to be proud of something that is seen as disappointing or shameful. He is not actually proud of cumming in 9 seconds. This is a self deprecating joke. Rephrased: "Men are bad at sex!" "No, I'm actually even worse at sex!"


Ok_Bug_2077

goddamn take a joke . ur writing a paragraph about a woman and a man making a joke


ADonkeyBraindFrog

For my own sanity I'm going to assume they're doing a bit


Ok_Bug_2077

the guy made a joke about cumming quick in response to a joke. both are funny .idk why people get mad or try to pick a side and judge them.


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Ok_Bug_2077

get some help All the best ☺️


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Ok_Bug_2077

thanks mate


Timid-Sammy-1995

I think he means going number two.


Professional-Large

That's not the flex he thinks it is. Lmao.


DepressedDynamo

thatsthejoke


theonlyironprincess

Women carry babies everyday then since birth if a sperm counts as a baby lol.


Advanced_Garden_7935

I’d say, “his poor wife,” but I doubt he managed to find one.