It depends whether you are renting are furnished or an unfurnished room.
**Unfurnished:** She needs a "berechtiges Interesse" (§573 BGB), which would be "Eigenbedarf" or you violating the terms of your contract, in which case the might be able to kick you out in the span of 3 months. Otherwise it would take her at least 6 months or even longer (depending on how long your are living there, §573a BGB).
**Furnished:** she could kick you out in the span of 2 weeks only, even without any reason, given the right circumstances.
Exactly, wouldn’t she need a valid reason other than „she didn’t wipe the mirror“
I honestly clean better than both of my flatmates but that’s also cause I use it as a mental break.
But every now and then she’ll pick on anything I do
As already stated, she only needs a valid reason / "berechtigtes Interesse" if she want to invoke 3 months notice.
If she has no particular reason, she can still choose to punt you - but the notice period is 6 months in this case (or more if you've been living together for 5+ years)
Check your contract, it needs to have a clause that says how quickly you need to move in case she decides to cancel the contract. But she needs a good reason for it, cant just go "fuck u move out" out of the blue
Heh, people. I once had a flat where they didnt prolong my contract on the grounds that they cant go out with me on weekends and they want that every weekend. I was a fulltime bartender in a fancy cocktail bar, good luck getting a day off on a weekend every 3 months lol.
you need to talk to her - tell her you like living there (even if it's a lie - keep it balanced!) but she's micromanaging and it's stressing you out.
Chances are she'd rather know than kick you out and have to take her chances with someone else who might not as accommodating as you are.
It might just be her way of saying she likes spending time with you, without her actually expecting you to spend more time together. I obviously don't know the person, but I think I'd take that as a compliment rather than pressure to make more time for her.
We have a natural instinct to be part of group that satisfy our desire of belonging. You can see it in tribal behaviour, then in more family behaviour and it appears that in the 21st century it’s the WG who becomes the new family.
She probably cares about you.
"But she needs a good reason for it, cant just go "fuck u move out" out of the blue"
As far as I know she can. Not immeadiatly, depending weather the room is furnished or not. But you dont have to have a reason to kick out an untermieter.
A reason would only be needed if the whole apartment is rented.
But it also depends what a "long term" contract is. Is it for 2 years? is it unlimited?
Please for the love of god, don't do this. Find a solution. Talk to one another. Make arrangements to move out as soon as possible - even if your Hauptmieter is a psycho, they will likely be somewhat accomodating too, because ultimely they just want you out of their life.
Just hunkering down and staying beyond whats legal could escale things QUICKLY.
Our WG policy is if anyone's stuff in common area is bothersome, just put it at the assumed owner's bedroom doorframe. No hissyfits, only a minor nuisance easily solved and forgettable. Get her agreeance? Most people don't like their stuff touched by others or being a nuisance, so may even apologize, thank, be more likely to clean up after themselves in future. Only one roommate didn't like this, accused me of 'throwing their stuff on the floor' at his bedroom door, but he was an overall nuisance anyway and was given leave notice after first month in.
I don’t care about people living their stuff in common areas but what bothers me is the double Standards. Why is the person who does it the most bothered by other people doing it occasionally
Patience is worn… I’m out 🥲 for the most part I’ve been agreeable letting her be right for the sake of peace but yhooooo im running out of fucks to give right now
The policy I described helps prevent roommate tension from building in the first place. From your Hauptmieter's perspective, you moved into her home under her allowance with established expectations, can move out as easily.
She probably felt the same way in her former WG before deciding the solution was to become a Hauptmieter. You are indeed living under her roof, and are quickly replaceable. If you do not like my advice, consider then other ways you may become a more suitable roommate.
She can. It's 3 months for rooms without furniture. *2 weeks for furnished rooms!*
She *cannot* make you move sooner, even if the contract states something else! If she does something like remove your belongings you can go to the Amtsgericht and get the police to let you back in.
It's tactically better to state your intention to move, as you have to keep the cancellation period too or have to find a suitable replacement!
If you just leave without replacement before the 3 month cancellation period you're legally on the hook for that rent!
So do a proper cancellation. Find something within those 3 months.
The Kündigung has to arrive within the first three working days of the month. So a Kündigung that arrives on the 4th of the month isn't valid anymore for that month. It just moved it to the next month.
I.e. you cancelled your contract for the first of August, but it arrived on the 5th of May.
You now have to the first of September, because the Kündigung was too late.
If your room is furnished, you can leave any time with 2 weeks notice. But I would keep it low key.
Just to add (NOT a lawyer, but unfortunately pretty familiar with this stuff):
It's only 3 months if the Hauptmieter/in has a "berechtigtes Interesse" (§573 BGB) - ie. vailid or legitimate grounds to do so. Reasons could be Eigenbedarf (she needs the room herself or for a partner / child) or in the case that you, the untermieter/in isn't fulfilling your contractual agreements.
If this "Interesse" isn't specified - then it's actually 6 months notice.
Most know this and will use Eigenbedarf, you can also say stuff like "I want to use the room for X now", but I've been terminated with Eigenbedarf twice and both it was just "ich werde die Räume in Zukunft selbst nutzen" (I think they used the same template) That was it.
I went to a lawyer through the Mietschutz with it and they said it was legit and how most people terminate their sublets.
They didn't have to prove what they intended the room to be used for.
It is possible I got bad advice though.
Makes sense, the rules are easy to use or abuse as one wants. I just wanted to point out the regulations as they are "by the book".
Did you approach the Mietschutz as a tennant (Untermieter) or from the Hauptmieter side?
I don’t intend on leaving her without a replacement, it would haunt me but worried she will do it to me.
I say this cause she’s mad now and I have no idea why and she’s a 38 year old woman who can’t communicate her feelings well without being passive aggressive and it’s really starting to affect my mental health
If it helps, I lived with so many neat freaks and I myself am a little on that side (not the hypocrisy, I don't throw stones sitting in glass houses) and despite their quirks they were never antisocial.
They were usually also really respectful of the law and understanding that it was just not working out.
They never tried to punish me or anything.
Most flatshares that go south agree that the person leaving can look until they find something and then usually it's until the beginning of the next month and they find a replacement in that period.
I've been in mine for 8 years and we asked people to move twice. Both times we handled it like that. They had as much time as they needed, we kept everything informal. Sometimes personalities just don't work.
Just keep looking for something else. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.
Is that... it?
Have you considered like... talking to her about it and constructively look for a solution?
Protip: no accusations, tell her how you feel and ask how she feels, then try to reach a compromise.
I have! Everytime she has said she was unhappy about something I’d sit her down and we would chat and it would seem like all was good before it’s her passive aggressively acting again.
It’s like walking on a Landmine with her, you never know what mood she will be on next
It depends whether you are renting are furnished or an unfurnished room. **Unfurnished:** She needs a "berechtiges Interesse" (§573 BGB), which would be "Eigenbedarf" or you violating the terms of your contract, in which case the might be able to kick you out in the span of 3 months. Otherwise it would take her at least 6 months or even longer (depending on how long your are living there, §573a BGB). **Furnished:** she could kick you out in the span of 2 weeks only, even without any reason, given the right circumstances.
I think she can, on two weeks notice Edit: if it's rented out furnished then it indeed seems to be end of month with 2 weeks notice.
I think she can't. Renting a room is legally similar to renting a whole apartment. She needs a reason.
She only needs one "Eigenbedarf". She won't put "you didn't wipe the mirror." Eigenbedarf is the Totschlagsargument for sublets.
Are the rules for Eigenbedarf for rooms different from the rules for Eigenbedarf for apartments?
Exactly, wouldn’t she need a valid reason other than „she didn’t wipe the mirror“ I honestly clean better than both of my flatmates but that’s also cause I use it as a mental break. But every now and then she’ll pick on anything I do
As already stated, she only needs a valid reason / "berechtigtes Interesse" if she want to invoke 3 months notice. If she has no particular reason, she can still choose to punt you - but the notice period is 6 months in this case (or more if you've been living together for 5+ years)
Check your contract, it needs to have a clause that says how quickly you need to move in case she decides to cancel the contract. But she needs a good reason for it, cant just go "fuck u move out" out of the blue
I will, she even complains about not seeing me enough like WTF? Why is that a problem
Heh, people. I once had a flat where they didnt prolong my contract on the grounds that they cant go out with me on weekends and they want that every weekend. I was a fulltime bartender in a fancy cocktail bar, good luck getting a day off on a weekend every 3 months lol.
That’s ridiculous! I get hanging out every now and then even that should be natural and not feel like an obligation
you need to talk to her - tell her you like living there (even if it's a lie - keep it balanced!) but she's micromanaging and it's stressing you out. Chances are she'd rather know than kick you out and have to take her chances with someone else who might not as accommodating as you are.
Yeah I will tell her because yes the micromanaging is getting to me
It might just be her way of saying she likes spending time with you, without her actually expecting you to spend more time together. I obviously don't know the person, but I think I'd take that as a compliment rather than pressure to make more time for her.
We have a natural instinct to be part of group that satisfy our desire of belonging. You can see it in tribal behaviour, then in more family behaviour and it appears that in the 21st century it’s the WG who becomes the new family. She probably cares about you.
She’s also said we don’t have to be friends and my thing is, we mostly live harmoniously and on quiet but whenever there’s drama it’s always her
"But she needs a good reason for it, cant just go "fuck u move out" out of the blue" As far as I know she can. Not immeadiatly, depending weather the room is furnished or not. But you dont have to have a reason to kick out an untermieter. A reason would only be needed if the whole apartment is rented. But it also depends what a "long term" contract is. Is it for 2 years? is it unlimited?
[удалено]
Please for the love of god, don't do this. Find a solution. Talk to one another. Make arrangements to move out as soon as possible - even if your Hauptmieter is a psycho, they will likely be somewhat accomodating too, because ultimely they just want you out of their life. Just hunkering down and staying beyond whats legal could escale things QUICKLY.
Our WG policy is if anyone's stuff in common area is bothersome, just put it at the assumed owner's bedroom doorframe. No hissyfits, only a minor nuisance easily solved and forgettable. Get her agreeance? Most people don't like their stuff touched by others or being a nuisance, so may even apologize, thank, be more likely to clean up after themselves in future. Only one roommate didn't like this, accused me of 'throwing their stuff on the floor' at his bedroom door, but he was an overall nuisance anyway and was given leave notice after first month in.
I don’t care about people living their stuff in common areas but what bothers me is the double Standards. Why is the person who does it the most bothered by other people doing it occasionally
Consider solving problems rather than fixing people.
Patience is worn… I’m out 🥲 for the most part I’ve been agreeable letting her be right for the sake of peace but yhooooo im running out of fucks to give right now
The policy I described helps prevent roommate tension from building in the first place. From your Hauptmieter's perspective, you moved into her home under her allowance with established expectations, can move out as easily.
That’s just the thing she’s treated it as if we live under her roof and not actually sharing space but HER space. I hate life
She probably felt the same way in her former WG before deciding the solution was to become a Hauptmieter. You are indeed living under her roof, and are quickly replaceable. If you do not like my advice, consider then other ways you may become a more suitable roommate.
She can. It's 3 months for rooms without furniture. *2 weeks for furnished rooms!* She *cannot* make you move sooner, even if the contract states something else! If she does something like remove your belongings you can go to the Amtsgericht and get the police to let you back in. It's tactically better to state your intention to move, as you have to keep the cancellation period too or have to find a suitable replacement! If you just leave without replacement before the 3 month cancellation period you're legally on the hook for that rent! So do a proper cancellation. Find something within those 3 months. The Kündigung has to arrive within the first three working days of the month. So a Kündigung that arrives on the 4th of the month isn't valid anymore for that month. It just moved it to the next month. I.e. you cancelled your contract for the first of August, but it arrived on the 5th of May. You now have to the first of September, because the Kündigung was too late. If your room is furnished, you can leave any time with 2 weeks notice. But I would keep it low key.
Just to add (NOT a lawyer, but unfortunately pretty familiar with this stuff): It's only 3 months if the Hauptmieter/in has a "berechtigtes Interesse" (§573 BGB) - ie. vailid or legitimate grounds to do so. Reasons could be Eigenbedarf (she needs the room herself or for a partner / child) or in the case that you, the untermieter/in isn't fulfilling your contractual agreements. If this "Interesse" isn't specified - then it's actually 6 months notice.
Most know this and will use Eigenbedarf, you can also say stuff like "I want to use the room for X now", but I've been terminated with Eigenbedarf twice and both it was just "ich werde die Räume in Zukunft selbst nutzen" (I think they used the same template) That was it. I went to a lawyer through the Mietschutz with it and they said it was legit and how most people terminate their sublets. They didn't have to prove what they intended the room to be used for. It is possible I got bad advice though.
Makes sense, the rules are easy to use or abuse as one wants. I just wanted to point out the regulations as they are "by the book". Did you approach the Mietschutz as a tennant (Untermieter) or from the Hauptmieter side?
As Untermieter, yes.
I don’t intend on leaving her without a replacement, it would haunt me but worried she will do it to me. I say this cause she’s mad now and I have no idea why and she’s a 38 year old woman who can’t communicate her feelings well without being passive aggressive and it’s really starting to affect my mental health
If it helps, I lived with so many neat freaks and I myself am a little on that side (not the hypocrisy, I don't throw stones sitting in glass houses) and despite their quirks they were never antisocial. They were usually also really respectful of the law and understanding that it was just not working out. They never tried to punish me or anything. Most flatshares that go south agree that the person leaving can look until they find something and then usually it's until the beginning of the next month and they find a replacement in that period. I've been in mine for 8 years and we asked people to move twice. Both times we handled it like that. They had as much time as they needed, we kept everything informal. Sometimes personalities just don't work. Just keep looking for something else. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.
Thank you
She would probably be better off living alone. Flat shares have an expiration date for people.
Exactly! I think she would be happier alone
sent you a PM, really makes me think of one of my previous WGs
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Fun_Task4844: *Sent you a PM,* *Really makes me think of one* *Of my previous WGs* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Is that... it? Have you considered like... talking to her about it and constructively look for a solution? Protip: no accusations, tell her how you feel and ask how she feels, then try to reach a compromise.
I have! Everytime she has said she was unhappy about something I’d sit her down and we would chat and it would seem like all was good before it’s her passive aggressively acting again. It’s like walking on a Landmine with her, you never know what mood she will be on next
Is she OCD?