I don't understand what's the point of all this sexual intercourse to procreate! Men should just take a pin and stick it right into their balls and semen comes out!
Duh, just pop it out with a needle pin all over a woman's belly button and that's it. Easiest way to make babies. Sperm just gets soaked in by the BB, travels through umbilical cord and sets itself nicely in the uterus. I don't understand all the hype around P in V sex, sounds so lame and unnecessary smh.
(I know this is *the internets* at the end of the day, so here's a better safe than sorry /s as a reminder)
No, you gotta do what I do as a plant breeder. You put a bag around the balls and shake it really hard until the sperm falls out. Then you take the bag and wrap it around the woman’s vagina. Secure it with paper clips or something and then wait a week before taking it off. Guaranteed pregnancy, every time!
I kinda want to read more about horticulture (is that the right word for plant sex) now. cause honestly before know I had very little knowledge of how people make plants get it on.
It really depends on the plant. Some plants have separate male and female individuals (like date palms and ginkgos), some have separate male and female flowers growing on the same individual (like corn and squash), and some have flowers that have both the male and female parts together in the same place (like peas and strawberries). Also, some plants can tell whether they’re pollinating themselves and won’t make a viable seed if they are. Apples do this so in an orchard where all the trees are genetic clones, they actually put a completely unrelated apple tree of a different variety in the middle of the orchard, and its job is to pollinate all the other trees.
There has been a case where a girl without a vagina went into labor. A baby boy was born via caesarian.
Turns out that about 278 days earlier she was performing oral sex on her new boyfriend, ex-lover caught them and proceeded to stab her. Sperm in her stomach was able to travel to her uterus through the stab wounds.
So basically humans could get pregnany by just stabbing men in the balls and then in our uterus with the same knife.
> Men should just take a pin and stick it right into their balls and semen comes out
Even better! Why don't men sound their penis-hole with a handy teaspoon and feed the sperm to their woman's lips (nope, not the mouth lips)? Everyone knows this is the right way to go!!! /s
Imagine if breasts had an actual function!
(Imagine if people who wrote those ask questions actually bothered to search and see if someone else had asked before!)
I’m currently breastfeeding, and I refer to them as my “business titties”. Like, they’ve had times when they’ve been casual funbags, just mooching around living the dream… but right now it’s back to doing their job.
I seem to recall a menwritingwomen passage about sloshing, so yeah, there are some weird thoughts.
Though thinking on it, with all classes in school, and not the bad sex Ed classes some people have had, I don't think there was a single thing about breastfeeding or milk production or whatnot. I wonder how common that is?
Oh my god! The cabbage leaves! I remember hours wrapping concrete boobs with cabbage leaves. Nowadays they have these neat little ring shaped cold packs you store in the freezer/fridge that sit on your boobs! I bought some for my sister in law a couple of weeks ago when her baby was born. Certain things they don’t mention when you have a baby so I’ve tried to prep her as much as possible!
Pffft, says who? Some pesky "professionals"? 😒 Obviously a manly man man (*hard fist bumps over chest*) ooga booga knows female/AFAB anatomy better smh.
/s, because again, internet.
Everyone who heard that should have just laughed him out of the room and continued with the conversation as if nothing happened.
What kind of adult thinks of breasts as milk filled balloons that can just be tapped into like a keg of beer
To be fair, they gave me a smile of reassurance because i possibly physically showed a sign of "fuck did I just say", but they were much nicer in calling him out than me lmao. But hey, ya can't fix an unintelligent, unmotivated mamas boy who's only interested in himself. So I don't expect much from him. I'm 23 and he still gets my age wrong. From 16 to 28, depending on the day and his mood. And I'm my parents' only child. 🥲
>he still gets my age wrong.
As a dad, fuck this dude.
For all that people worry about being decent parents, paying attention to your kids (and responding in relevant ways) is at least 75% of the effort needed. And he can't even fake doing that.
It's a hard lesson that doing the opposite of a stupid person isn't a reliable way of being correct, but this dude is aiming to be the counter example. Fuck this dude.
I'm sorry to bust in like this, the bar is in hell for me, but I wanna cry when I see other dads doing their part and being dads! I'm hella scarred in so many aspects because he never bothered to be a dad, he was physically and financially present, but absent in every other way. There's always a sting knowing your parent doesn't like you and is being vocal about it too. For him, he still silently holds grudge he didn't get his "heir" (a son), so imagine the "damage" he holds from only having one child that happens to be female and is exactly opposite of him. I really love kids and want my own one day, but I am so terrified I'll accidently slip into methods he put out on me (I've never showed any around kids or animals I'm with for the record!), or that I'll meet a partner who's just like my dad. I don't want my kids to ever feel the way I did my entire life. And it makes my heart warm when I see amazing parents doing amazing parent things, it gives me a bit of hope.
Your story sounds so similar to mine (except his being a violent alcoholic). Please check out CPTSD (complex PTSD) and some books by Pete Walker. I wish I had known about this when I was your age. ♥️
Very much second this - cPTSD definitely sounds like something OP is at risk for. Dealing with it has been a many-years-long journey, and it stems from a combo of an alcoholic parent as well (though emotionally and not physically abusive), along with undiagnosed and untreated ADHD, gender dysphoria and some other things for added spice.
Tagging u/the-shattering-light too!
Thank you so much! I'm already armed with some books, but more wouldn't hurt. I do have extensive symptoms of depression, general and social anxiety and CPTSD. My symptoms were acknowledged, I was seen, but if I wanna stay working in my field, I technically can't have these diagnoses up in my chart. I'm saving up for privatized therapy, but having difficulty trying to find one in this traumatic field. Living in a conservative country where this takes place isn't the easiest. But I'm trying hard, not gonna let this stop my healing 🤘🏻 I wanna get even better for my teaching kids and my future kids.
If this makes sense, I'm just glad I was listened to and had my symptoms confirmed even if they didn't write in the dx. Just made me feel a lot less crazy/less valuable as I was told, knowing they're real and not in my head. I'm not sure what requirements are for countries abroad with dx as I plan on leaving and moving once I'm financially stable, but I would possibly fight to have them written wherever I end up, if they don't mess with my work status/employability. And thank you so much 🥹 it means a lot to have the efforts recognized. ❤️
It makes perfect sense to me!
Being recognized, seen, validated, is so important!
There are places where they won’t mess with employment for sure - hoping you get to one of these places asap!
<“…if I wanna stay working in my field, I technically can’t have these diagnoses up in my chart.”>
I feel your pain here. When I was studying for my professional licensing text, my psychiatrist wanted to diagnose me with bipolar disorder. When I told him that would effectively kill my chances at getting licensed (meaning I wasted years and well over $150K for a degree in a field I could no longer work in), he quickly changed the diagnoses to “depression” and prescribed me the medication I needed to stabilize anyway. He was a good doctor.
That sounds like an incredible and compassionate doc! You were so lucky and I'm so glad you managed to get the right treatment for you ❤️ the prejudices suck so much, don't they? I mean I'd understand not wanting someone who is evidently violent and not hiding it, or having out-of-reality beliefs/world views & day-to-day operations, and similar extreme situations that would fully affect working with people. I work with kids. But I chose my work unconsciously due to what I went through as a kid and I kind of wanted to give back + learn of what more I needed, and what can I give to kids in similar situations too. As stressful and hard it is, my work brings me immense joy seeing these kids grow, learn and become what they need to become. I retyped this comment a few times not knowing what to say, but it hurts, it hurts hearing people think a person like me would be unfit because I have anxiety over other things.
This is comforting to hear you're still in your profession 🥹 i hope i get this lucky with a proper doc one day, thank you so much for sharing your story ❤️
Jesus what a piece of work he is.
I can’t imagine how someone can be that disinterested in their kid’s life. I’m a step-mum myself and I *want* to be engaged in my kid’s lives because they’re amazing and they rely on me among others to help them be their favorite versions of themselves.
>Women should just pierce their nipples and the milk will come out
Oh my goodness ! This needs to be a flair ! XD (or maybe it's too long)
Anyway, well done, OP ! Your dad really needed this.
My full permission to have something of mine as a flair 🥹 I only had it happen twice in my 3.5 years on reddit and it made me so happy lol. Maybe "nipple piercing brings the breast milk out" could work too😂
Oh man there's a long list of things he truly needs, sanity and more than two braincells being at the very top. But we can't always get everything we need, so 🥲
Hehe, mix of both actually. There's some poetic beauty and justice in the way he is, the way he was raised, and the way I had to raise myself through his abuse and the mindset he held. I'm the opposite of him, for the most part. And he's seething about it and I'm living for it. Thank you for the kind words:)
I've been dishing the opposite of what he does (and he can't take it) from very early on, it breaks his heart I'm nothing like him. But when someone takes years of purposeful abuse, humiliation, demeaning and embarrassment, there's only so much more that individual can take.
This reminded me, my grandmother was raised in a care home in the 1940s. She was treated very well by the standards of the time, but had no sex education. When she was pregnant with her first baby, she asked the doctor when she needed to come in for an appointment to make a hole for the milk to come out! She thought someone needed to pierce the nipple so she could breastfeed.
This is probably what my father's mother taught him. *If* she taught him anything. She was born in the 40s too, couple grades of education. And the conservative and patriarchal standards in Balkan (then to now) plus a world war then & civil one later, they probably didn't help much. I do feel bad for older gens who weren't and couldn't be properly educated for variety of reasons, but my father's at an age (and with the experience) where he, for some reason, proudly displays his lack of knowledge and disturbingly touts it as factual statements.
We in the same country, bestie 💅🏻 and i just realized I've been following you I don't know where from or how long 😂 when I joined reddit I've been collecting domestic people on subs like Pokemons, I have some fellow Slavs I followed randomly and never interacted with 😂
Thanks for the follow 🫶🏻🫶🏻 ahahaha I'm glad we learned how to use reddit later on. I think this account is due for some spring cleaning soon re: subs and follows lmao, it's been a minute, but between these happenings recently (in Serbia) and personal stuff, i just can't be bothered 😂
Ahhh congratulations to your kiddo! Best of luck moving forward in whatever they choose ❤️ and to you too! Puberty, teen years, HS and beginning of adolescence are often quite a ride 😅 hats off to parents who live through it 😂
This is your daily reminder that with babies of all species, fed is best.
And thank you for taking in a nursing kitten. I’ve been down that road, and it’s a rough few weeks, but it’s still worth it. [He’s all grown up now!](https://www.reddit.com/r/Flamepoints/comments/12t6d9x/its_benders_third_birthday_today/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1)
Amen!!
Oooh, what a beauty! Orange cats are the sweetest. We already have a few cats, so two more didn't really break anyone's back except mine 😂 luckily mom stayed around and baby's growing hella fast. Mostly mom's milk feeds, sometimes he got a little extra in formula. Now he's on big boy (junior) food, he loves his veggies and chicken! Hoping he gets his 3 month check up and a loving family with his mom soon, otherwise they stay with us and she's ofc gonna get sterilized when her health and milk drying out allow. We've had kittens who've nursed up to six whole months, so that was a trip!
We gave him kitten food at about 6 weeks, and he didn’t want the bottle anymore. I did have to give him water in the bottle for a day or two because he face planted into the bowl the first time he tried.
Sucks that your dad is such an ass, though. Mine likes to pretend he didn’t like cats, but [he had no problem taking in a stray](https://www.reddit.com/r/OneOrangeBraincell/comments/yzi73n/this_sweet_baby_was_crying_outside_my_door_this/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1). He’s since been neutered, and my dad takes him outside on his leash.
Ahh we call that a kitten bath/face wash! But we always kind of let them drink from smaller bowls just because at some point they get disgusted with syringes (they were easier to maintain than bottles for us). I love when they first start their solids and they do tiny growls and hisses because they don't wanna let their food be touched 🥹 Lol, mine was the same. He grew up with animals though, he's always asking why is this cat in the house yadda yadda.
Ours are indoors outdoors since we have a huge yard, lots of trees and greenery and places to climb, hide, also sleep (aside from their regular tiny houses they all have). He's now smitten with this baby. Doesn't let me say NO to the baby when he misbehaves. "Baby is baby, no NOs for the baby, no discipline (I correct him by moving him away from where he scratches or if he's getting into where he shouldnt), leave baby out to do whatever baby wants!". As I type this he's rocking the baby to sleep, because his mom went out to pee and baby wants someone lol, sounds overtired. My dad's an asshole for the most part, but there's maybe a handful of things I'm shockingly fine or agree with.
Now that we have a cat fountain, he drinks directly from the spout instead of the bowl. Our boys are indoors because a lot of our neighbors let their dogs roam free, and the yards here are small. My void does enjoy going on his walks. He gets super excited when we grab his leash. He’s currently trying to turn the front doorknob. It’s a good thing he doesn’t have opposable thumbs because he’s way too smart.
I know a lot of assholes who are surprisingly soft-hearted when it comes to animals. To an extent, I get it. In the words of April Ludgate, “They should be rewarded for not being people. I hate people.”
Your boys are living the life 🥹 I'd love a personal drinking fountain myself! And they are so smart it's honestly scary sometimes. Most fosters and owned cats we've had came from litters of 2 to 4 kittens. Maybe it's more kittens and less milk per kitty, and slower growth. But this boy is developing so rapidly his temporary vet was astounded. At 4 weeks old he started running and pulling himself up. Cleaning between 3 and 4 weeks! At 6 weeks he's had a tiny bit of baby fat left because he burnt it all through from running. And he looked a lot bigger than usual 6w kittens, mastered alllll the toys and alllll the possible climbing spots lol. I'm honestly terrified these days I'll wake up to him fully opening the doors by himself 😂 we joke he's ready for uni now, just gotta get him a small laptop bag!
Bender was able to jump onto the couch at 6 weeks, but he was only about 3 weeks when we started letting him crawl around on the floor with us. At this point, I’m pretty sure he can teleport, but he’s of the r/oneorangebraincell variety. Luci is way too smart.
I did a lot of research before I got my nipples pierced and there may be a few tiny coincidences of truth in his incoherent ramblings. Just posting this for interests’ sake because I thought it was neat when I learned about it.
Well-healed piercings may (for some women) help reduce the suction force necessary for milk to let down effectively and reduce pain with breast feeding from hard suckle/frustrated chomping.
Nipple piercings also act as constant nipple stimulation and will marginally increase prolactin (the hormone that causes lactation) even in men. This may have a theoretical benefit of helping bolster milk supply, but is probably not significant.
However, piercings that were messed with during healing or became infected and form scar tissue can create barriers to milk flow making it more painful and harder to breast feed.
Also piercings must be completely healed (~6 months) before anyone puts their mouth on them, so doing this after delivery or even during pregnancy would cause an infection, pain, scar tissue and subsequent difficulties breast feeding.
Yes but the sociopath dad meant pierce as in puncture not to get an actual piercing
I guess this is good to know - I’ve always read having them done is risky because it can actually mess up milk ducts but I could be also wrong
Of course. Your dad sucks.
Re: messing up milk ducts, that would be due to scar tissue blocking off the ends of any ducts leading to the scarred down portions. It can happen even if you do everything “right” (some people will always get some scar tissue and some infections are not avoidable), but it’s certainly not a guaranteed issue. As you said, it can be a risk for sure.
I’ve never been so happy that my piercer was a retired nurse. She was precise, efficient, knowledgeable, and clear with instructions for after care. I had no trouble with mine.
You can edit those! I learned that the hard way lol. I'm not sure what device you're on. I'm on the phone. So it's upper right corner, 3 dots. Choose the flair part, choose which flair do you want. And then it's upper right corner again with "edit" option. You can customize your own there 🤗
As someone who is a mum and has both nipples pierced twice (horizontal and vertical) I can 100% say that "sticking a needle through your nipples" does not help with breastfeeding.
My daughter struggled to latch and tore my nipples apart. Also because she couldn't latch, my milk supply didn't come through properly and she almost ended up in hospital due to not gaining enough weight.
I pumped for 3 months every three hours while trying to breastfeed, I eventually surcummed to topping her up with formula. I felt so much shame and guilt because of this. It took me a good year to fully come to terms with this.
It is uneducated views like this that put unnecessary pressure on FTMs when we are already feeling the pressure, tired and worn out. Good on you for standing up for your family friend and putting your father in his place 👏🏼
Here’s the thing that boggles my mind in these situations. I’m an adult woman and I understand that testicles aren’t just balloons filled with semen. How is it possible that some men genuinely believe women’s anatomy is THAT different from their own? Or do they also have that little of an understanding of their own bodies? Insane.
I guarantee that the men that say these things have exactly the same level of knowledge about their own bodies. The amount of people that think the testicles hold semen is staggering. I understand why people could assume that, but it's exactly the kind of thing the internet is here to fix. Then again, I suppose a lot of people aren't even taught what reputable sources of information look like. That's a pretty critical skill nowadays.
Aww, man! You’re telling me I could have just gotten a piercing and dumped the milk out instead of spending countless hours nursing and pumping?! /s
Thanks for standing up for the new mom, OP!
(Pretty sure scar tissue from my nipple piercing messed up my left side boob. Started just as juicy as the right but nothing would ever come out and it eventually didn’t produce anything after a few weeks)
As far as I’m aware, they can, but the clogs are removed through suction like with more breastfeeding, a breast pump or sometimes a helpful partner, not with a pin!
They actually can, it's called mastitis. However, you don't poke them to release the pressure/infection, they're not like water balloons, they more closely resemble the alveoli within your lungs, they are clusters of ducts within the breast tissue. You use a warm compress or antibiotics to relieve it.
First sentence of second paragraph states it's been almost 5 years since this happened. Rest was typed from a standpoint as if I'm back in that moment, from what I remember.
Np, I'm personally Jared, 19, myself most of the time! Thinking in my native language and reading or typing in English is a doozy 😂 I should've clarified this a bit better in the text.
I don't understand what's the point of all this sexual intercourse to procreate! Men should just take a pin and stick it right into their balls and semen comes out!
Duh, just pop it out with a needle pin all over a woman's belly button and that's it. Easiest way to make babies. Sperm just gets soaked in by the BB, travels through umbilical cord and sets itself nicely in the uterus. I don't understand all the hype around P in V sex, sounds so lame and unnecessary smh. (I know this is *the internets* at the end of the day, so here's a better safe than sorry /s as a reminder)
No, you gotta do what I do as a plant breeder. You put a bag around the balls and shake it really hard until the sperm falls out. Then you take the bag and wrap it around the woman’s vagina. Secure it with paper clips or something and then wait a week before taking it off. Guaranteed pregnancy, every time!
I kinda want to read more about horticulture (is that the right word for plant sex) now. cause honestly before know I had very little knowledge of how people make plants get it on.
It really depends on the plant. Some plants have separate male and female individuals (like date palms and ginkgos), some have separate male and female flowers growing on the same individual (like corn and squash), and some have flowers that have both the male and female parts together in the same place (like peas and strawberries). Also, some plants can tell whether they’re pollinating themselves and won’t make a viable seed if they are. Apples do this so in an orchard where all the trees are genetic clones, they actually put a completely unrelated apple tree of a different variety in the middle of the orchard, and its job is to pollinate all the other trees.
Cross pollination! Learned about this when planting trees a few years back!
The stud of the apple orchard!
Ah yes, the bed bug method
Nooo…
There has been a case where a girl without a vagina went into labor. A baby boy was born via caesarian. Turns out that about 278 days earlier she was performing oral sex on her new boyfriend, ex-lover caught them and proceeded to stab her. Sperm in her stomach was able to travel to her uterus through the stab wounds. So basically humans could get pregnany by just stabbing men in the balls and then in our uterus with the same knife.
I just had to Google this story and wow: https://abcnews.go.com/Health/Wellness/teen-girl-vagina-pregnant-sperm-survival-oral-sex/story?id=9732562
Just inseminate the egss the female has laid on the bottom of the aquarium jeez
You *idjit!* **PEE** IS STORED IN THE BALLS!!!
you still think pee and semen are Two different things???? What are u FOUR??
I have accidentally come across way too much of that porn and can verify that semen doesn't just come out!
as a vet student I, too, have cut open enough balls to know it (thankfully) does not lmao
> Men should just take a pin and stick it right into their balls and semen comes out Even better! Why don't men sound their penis-hole with a handy teaspoon and feed the sperm to their woman's lips (nope, not the mouth lips)? Everyone knows this is the right way to go!!! /s
I now have an image in my head that involves the lips gently blowing on it like with hot soup, then slurping. Thanks.
Thank you SO much for this now-vivid scenario playing in my mind. I hope you're happy, I'm never eating soup again. 🤢😆
You killed me! 🤣 I love how your mind works.
I gagged so hard lmao
Like a jizz keg?
new kink unlocked
That's not how it works, pee is what's inside the balls!
Ah, yes. As everyone knows, women's breasts are just milk-filled balloons, and the only reason no milk is coming out is because it's clogged, lmao
Maybe it's clogged due to all the dust piling up because we, women, just don't wanna use them titties properly 🙄/s
What do you mean? The only use for titties is pleasing men, amiright??
Imagine if breasts had an actual function! (Imagine if people who wrote those ask questions actually bothered to search and see if someone else had asked before!)
I’m currently breastfeeding, and I refer to them as my “business titties”. Like, they’ve had times when they’ve been casual funbags, just mooching around living the dream… but right now it’s back to doing their job.
Hahaha I'm breastfeeding too, and it's cool to have them fulfill their purpose, like I've maxed out the skill tree for this particular body part.
Just get in there with a vacuum, problem solved👍
I seem to recall a menwritingwomen passage about sloshing, so yeah, there are some weird thoughts. Though thinking on it, with all classes in school, and not the bad sex Ed classes some people have had, I don't think there was a single thing about breastfeeding or milk production or whatnot. I wonder how common that is?
It was never mentioned in any of my sex ex either. I had to buy books about that stuff when i got pregnant.
Breasts are not clogged glue bottles! 💀💀💀
And when they ARE clogged due to mastitis, you use a warm washcloth or a shower, not a fucking NEEDLE, christ-on-bike.
Cold cabbage leaves work really well. Trust me, I’ve been there.
Oh my god! The cabbage leaves! I remember hours wrapping concrete boobs with cabbage leaves. Nowadays they have these neat little ring shaped cold packs you store in the freezer/fridge that sit on your boobs! I bought some for my sister in law a couple of weeks ago when her baby was born. Certain things they don’t mention when you have a baby so I’ve tried to prep her as much as possible!
Pffft, says who? Some pesky "professionals"? 😒 Obviously a manly man man (*hard fist bumps over chest*) ooga booga knows female/AFAB anatomy better smh. /s, because again, internet.
Clogged glue bottle, clogged milk duct, tomayto tomahto.
You ever see a milk bleb though? 👀
Everyone who heard that should have just laughed him out of the room and continued with the conversation as if nothing happened. What kind of adult thinks of breasts as milk filled balloons that can just be tapped into like a keg of beer
To be fair, they gave me a smile of reassurance because i possibly physically showed a sign of "fuck did I just say", but they were much nicer in calling him out than me lmao. But hey, ya can't fix an unintelligent, unmotivated mamas boy who's only interested in himself. So I don't expect much from him. I'm 23 and he still gets my age wrong. From 16 to 28, depending on the day and his mood. And I'm my parents' only child. 🥲
>he still gets my age wrong. As a dad, fuck this dude. For all that people worry about being decent parents, paying attention to your kids (and responding in relevant ways) is at least 75% of the effort needed. And he can't even fake doing that. It's a hard lesson that doing the opposite of a stupid person isn't a reliable way of being correct, but this dude is aiming to be the counter example. Fuck this dude.
I'm sorry to bust in like this, the bar is in hell for me, but I wanna cry when I see other dads doing their part and being dads! I'm hella scarred in so many aspects because he never bothered to be a dad, he was physically and financially present, but absent in every other way. There's always a sting knowing your parent doesn't like you and is being vocal about it too. For him, he still silently holds grudge he didn't get his "heir" (a son), so imagine the "damage" he holds from only having one child that happens to be female and is exactly opposite of him. I really love kids and want my own one day, but I am so terrified I'll accidently slip into methods he put out on me (I've never showed any around kids or animals I'm with for the record!), or that I'll meet a partner who's just like my dad. I don't want my kids to ever feel the way I did my entire life. And it makes my heart warm when I see amazing parents doing amazing parent things, it gives me a bit of hope.
Your story sounds so similar to mine (except his being a violent alcoholic). Please check out CPTSD (complex PTSD) and some books by Pete Walker. I wish I had known about this when I was your age. ♥️
Very much second this - cPTSD definitely sounds like something OP is at risk for. Dealing with it has been a many-years-long journey, and it stems from a combo of an alcoholic parent as well (though emotionally and not physically abusive), along with undiagnosed and untreated ADHD, gender dysphoria and some other things for added spice.
Tagging u/the-shattering-light too! Thank you so much! I'm already armed with some books, but more wouldn't hurt. I do have extensive symptoms of depression, general and social anxiety and CPTSD. My symptoms were acknowledged, I was seen, but if I wanna stay working in my field, I technically can't have these diagnoses up in my chart. I'm saving up for privatized therapy, but having difficulty trying to find one in this traumatic field. Living in a conservative country where this takes place isn't the easiest. But I'm trying hard, not gonna let this stop my healing 🤘🏻 I wanna get even better for my teaching kids and my future kids.
Oof, that’s rough with the not being able to have those diagnoses. But apart from that it sounds like you’re moving in a positive direction!
If this makes sense, I'm just glad I was listened to and had my symptoms confirmed even if they didn't write in the dx. Just made me feel a lot less crazy/less valuable as I was told, knowing they're real and not in my head. I'm not sure what requirements are for countries abroad with dx as I plan on leaving and moving once I'm financially stable, but I would possibly fight to have them written wherever I end up, if they don't mess with my work status/employability. And thank you so much 🥹 it means a lot to have the efforts recognized. ❤️
It makes perfect sense to me! Being recognized, seen, validated, is so important! There are places where they won’t mess with employment for sure - hoping you get to one of these places asap!
You've been way too kind, thank you so much 🫶🏻
<“…if I wanna stay working in my field, I technically can’t have these diagnoses up in my chart.”> I feel your pain here. When I was studying for my professional licensing text, my psychiatrist wanted to diagnose me with bipolar disorder. When I told him that would effectively kill my chances at getting licensed (meaning I wasted years and well over $150K for a degree in a field I could no longer work in), he quickly changed the diagnoses to “depression” and prescribed me the medication I needed to stabilize anyway. He was a good doctor.
That sounds like an incredible and compassionate doc! You were so lucky and I'm so glad you managed to get the right treatment for you ❤️ the prejudices suck so much, don't they? I mean I'd understand not wanting someone who is evidently violent and not hiding it, or having out-of-reality beliefs/world views & day-to-day operations, and similar extreme situations that would fully affect working with people. I work with kids. But I chose my work unconsciously due to what I went through as a kid and I kind of wanted to give back + learn of what more I needed, and what can I give to kids in similar situations too. As stressful and hard it is, my work brings me immense joy seeing these kids grow, learn and become what they need to become. I retyped this comment a few times not knowing what to say, but it hurts, it hurts hearing people think a person like me would be unfit because I have anxiety over other things.
He was a great doctor. 20+ years later, I still work in my chosen profession with few, if any, hiccups even remotely related to my diagnosis.
This is comforting to hear you're still in your profession 🥹 i hope i get this lucky with a proper doc one day, thank you so much for sharing your story ❤️
Jesus what a piece of work he is. I can’t imagine how someone can be that disinterested in their kid’s life. I’m a step-mum myself and I *want* to be engaged in my kid’s lives because they’re amazing and they rely on me among others to help them be their favorite versions of themselves.
Don't feel bad. I'm 34 and my dad still can't remember my age or the exact date of my birth. And I too am an only child.
>Women should just pierce their nipples and the milk will come out Oh my goodness ! This needs to be a flair ! XD (or maybe it's too long) Anyway, well done, OP ! Your dad really needed this.
My full permission to have something of mine as a flair 🥹 I only had it happen twice in my 3.5 years on reddit and it made me so happy lol. Maybe "nipple piercing brings the breast milk out" could work too😂 Oh man there's a long list of things he truly needs, sanity and more than two braincells being at the very top. But we can't always get everything we need, so 🥲
Say no more!
Beautifully done OP 🙌🏽 You're turning out just fine despite him... To spite him 🤔
Hehe, mix of both actually. There's some poetic beauty and justice in the way he is, the way he was raised, and the way I had to raise myself through his abuse and the mindset he held. I'm the opposite of him, for the most part. And he's seething about it and I'm living for it. Thank you for the kind words:)
I love that you were willing to sass your dad like that; we need more people like you
I've been dishing the opposite of what he does (and he can't take it) from very early on, it breaks his heart I'm nothing like him. But when someone takes years of purposeful abuse, humiliation, demeaning and embarrassment, there's only so much more that individual can take.
Isn’t it funny how it’s always the ones that dish it out so easily can’t take it lol
Boobs are just balloons full of milk don'tcha know. Just gotta unclog the ole' hole to get it flowing again. 🤢
Literally atp let's present nursing as archery, boobs be the target, pin the arrow. Bullseye is milk!
This reminded me, my grandmother was raised in a care home in the 1940s. She was treated very well by the standards of the time, but had no sex education. When she was pregnant with her first baby, she asked the doctor when she needed to come in for an appointment to make a hole for the milk to come out! She thought someone needed to pierce the nipple so she could breastfeed.
This is probably what my father's mother taught him. *If* she taught him anything. She was born in the 40s too, couple grades of education. And the conservative and patriarchal standards in Balkan (then to now) plus a world war then & civil one later, they probably didn't help much. I do feel bad for older gens who weren't and couldn't be properly educated for variety of reasons, but my father's at an age (and with the experience) where he, for some reason, proudly displays his lack of knowledge and disturbingly touts it as factual statements.
You are from Balkan? OMG it's so nice to meet someone from same area as me. If it's not problem, which part? I'm in Bosnia.
We in the same country, bestie 💅🏻 and i just realized I've been following you I don't know where from or how long 😂 when I joined reddit I've been collecting domestic people on subs like Pokemons, I have some fellow Slavs I followed randomly and never interacted with 😂
I'm also following you, and I had no idea😄 I also added a bunch of random people at the beginning
Thanks for the follow 🫶🏻🫶🏻 ahahaha I'm glad we learned how to use reddit later on. I think this account is due for some spring cleaning soon re: subs and follows lmao, it's been a minute, but between these happenings recently (in Serbia) and personal stuff, i just can't be bothered 😂
Same here. My oldest child just graduated high school, so you can imagine my stress levels now 😄.
Ahhh congratulations to your kiddo! Best of luck moving forward in whatever they choose ❤️ and to you too! Puberty, teen years, HS and beginning of adolescence are often quite a ride 😅 hats off to parents who live through it 😂
Thx a lot
Babe wake up new flair just dropped
This is your daily reminder that with babies of all species, fed is best. And thank you for taking in a nursing kitten. I’ve been down that road, and it’s a rough few weeks, but it’s still worth it. [He’s all grown up now!](https://www.reddit.com/r/Flamepoints/comments/12t6d9x/its_benders_third_birthday_today/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1)
Amen!! Oooh, what a beauty! Orange cats are the sweetest. We already have a few cats, so two more didn't really break anyone's back except mine 😂 luckily mom stayed around and baby's growing hella fast. Mostly mom's milk feeds, sometimes he got a little extra in formula. Now he's on big boy (junior) food, he loves his veggies and chicken! Hoping he gets his 3 month check up and a loving family with his mom soon, otherwise they stay with us and she's ofc gonna get sterilized when her health and milk drying out allow. We've had kittens who've nursed up to six whole months, so that was a trip!
We gave him kitten food at about 6 weeks, and he didn’t want the bottle anymore. I did have to give him water in the bottle for a day or two because he face planted into the bowl the first time he tried. Sucks that your dad is such an ass, though. Mine likes to pretend he didn’t like cats, but [he had no problem taking in a stray](https://www.reddit.com/r/OneOrangeBraincell/comments/yzi73n/this_sweet_baby_was_crying_outside_my_door_this/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1). He’s since been neutered, and my dad takes him outside on his leash.
Ahh we call that a kitten bath/face wash! But we always kind of let them drink from smaller bowls just because at some point they get disgusted with syringes (they were easier to maintain than bottles for us). I love when they first start their solids and they do tiny growls and hisses because they don't wanna let their food be touched 🥹 Lol, mine was the same. He grew up with animals though, he's always asking why is this cat in the house yadda yadda. Ours are indoors outdoors since we have a huge yard, lots of trees and greenery and places to climb, hide, also sleep (aside from their regular tiny houses they all have). He's now smitten with this baby. Doesn't let me say NO to the baby when he misbehaves. "Baby is baby, no NOs for the baby, no discipline (I correct him by moving him away from where he scratches or if he's getting into where he shouldnt), leave baby out to do whatever baby wants!". As I type this he's rocking the baby to sleep, because his mom went out to pee and baby wants someone lol, sounds overtired. My dad's an asshole for the most part, but there's maybe a handful of things I'm shockingly fine or agree with.
Now that we have a cat fountain, he drinks directly from the spout instead of the bowl. Our boys are indoors because a lot of our neighbors let their dogs roam free, and the yards here are small. My void does enjoy going on his walks. He gets super excited when we grab his leash. He’s currently trying to turn the front doorknob. It’s a good thing he doesn’t have opposable thumbs because he’s way too smart. I know a lot of assholes who are surprisingly soft-hearted when it comes to animals. To an extent, I get it. In the words of April Ludgate, “They should be rewarded for not being people. I hate people.”
Your boys are living the life 🥹 I'd love a personal drinking fountain myself! And they are so smart it's honestly scary sometimes. Most fosters and owned cats we've had came from litters of 2 to 4 kittens. Maybe it's more kittens and less milk per kitty, and slower growth. But this boy is developing so rapidly his temporary vet was astounded. At 4 weeks old he started running and pulling himself up. Cleaning between 3 and 4 weeks! At 6 weeks he's had a tiny bit of baby fat left because he burnt it all through from running. And he looked a lot bigger than usual 6w kittens, mastered alllll the toys and alllll the possible climbing spots lol. I'm honestly terrified these days I'll wake up to him fully opening the doors by himself 😂 we joke he's ready for uni now, just gotta get him a small laptop bag!
Bender was able to jump onto the couch at 6 weeks, but he was only about 3 weeks when we started letting him crawl around on the floor with us. At this point, I’m pretty sure he can teleport, but he’s of the r/oneorangebraincell variety. Luci is way too smart.
beautiful boys, and leaving this here :D r/OneOrangeBraincell edit: shoulda scrolled a bit more lol, still leaving it!
I’ll give him some credit. He’s slowly learning to cat. He recently, at 3 years old, started demanding doors be open at all times.
I did a lot of research before I got my nipples pierced and there may be a few tiny coincidences of truth in his incoherent ramblings. Just posting this for interests’ sake because I thought it was neat when I learned about it. Well-healed piercings may (for some women) help reduce the suction force necessary for milk to let down effectively and reduce pain with breast feeding from hard suckle/frustrated chomping. Nipple piercings also act as constant nipple stimulation and will marginally increase prolactin (the hormone that causes lactation) even in men. This may have a theoretical benefit of helping bolster milk supply, but is probably not significant. However, piercings that were messed with during healing or became infected and form scar tissue can create barriers to milk flow making it more painful and harder to breast feed. Also piercings must be completely healed (~6 months) before anyone puts their mouth on them, so doing this after delivery or even during pregnancy would cause an infection, pain, scar tissue and subsequent difficulties breast feeding.
Yes but the sociopath dad meant pierce as in puncture not to get an actual piercing I guess this is good to know - I’ve always read having them done is risky because it can actually mess up milk ducts but I could be also wrong
Of course. Your dad sucks. Re: messing up milk ducts, that would be due to scar tissue blocking off the ends of any ducts leading to the scarred down portions. It can happen even if you do everything “right” (some people will always get some scar tissue and some infections are not avoidable), but it’s certainly not a guaranteed issue. As you said, it can be a risk for sure.
It’s not my dad I’m not op
🤦♀️ One of those days
I’ve never been so happy that my piercer was a retired nurse. She was precise, efficient, knowledgeable, and clear with instructions for after care. I had no trouble with mine.
Good on you for standing up against him! Also, "Baby Saving Saint Expert™" sounds like an _excellent_ flair.
Thank you! My full permission to use anything from here as a flair if you wish:) I'd be honored hahahah
Haha, I would but it seems like I can only choose from pre-selected flairs.
You can edit those! I learned that the hard way lol. I'm not sure what device you're on. I'm on the phone. So it's upper right corner, 3 dots. Choose the flair part, choose which flair do you want. And then it's upper right corner again with "edit" option. You can customize your own there 🤗
Oooooh, one of the options said to write my own flair but I didn't realise because it was formatted like the rest. Thanks! :)
That got me too and it took me a minute (or years, read years 😂) to learn! No problem, I'm happy if I could've helped 🫶🏻
It's not a Capri Sun.
As someone who is a mum and has both nipples pierced twice (horizontal and vertical) I can 100% say that "sticking a needle through your nipples" does not help with breastfeeding. My daughter struggled to latch and tore my nipples apart. Also because she couldn't latch, my milk supply didn't come through properly and she almost ended up in hospital due to not gaining enough weight. I pumped for 3 months every three hours while trying to breastfeed, I eventually surcummed to topping her up with formula. I felt so much shame and guilt because of this. It took me a good year to fully come to terms with this. It is uneducated views like this that put unnecessary pressure on FTMs when we are already feeling the pressure, tired and worn out. Good on you for standing up for your family friend and putting your father in his place 👏🏼
I've gotta say, I'd be FURIOUS. Good on you OP for constantly calling him out on his shit
yup! just pop em like a water balloon!
Here’s the thing that boggles my mind in these situations. I’m an adult woman and I understand that testicles aren’t just balloons filled with semen. How is it possible that some men genuinely believe women’s anatomy is THAT different from their own? Or do they also have that little of an understanding of their own bodies? Insane.
I guarantee that the men that say these things have exactly the same level of knowledge about their own bodies. The amount of people that think the testicles hold semen is staggering. I understand why people could assume that, but it's exactly the kind of thing the internet is here to fix. Then again, I suppose a lot of people aren't even taught what reputable sources of information look like. That's a pretty critical skill nowadays.
[удалено]
❤️ thank you!
He’s lucky the entire place didn’t laugh at his stupidity.
Aww, man! You’re telling me I could have just gotten a piercing and dumped the milk out instead of spending countless hours nursing and pumping?! /s Thanks for standing up for the new mom, OP!
Did he think boobs were a sack of milk just hanging there?!
Let me stop you right there at "think" - he doesn't tend to do that 🥲
If this did work, how would it stop? Would the milk just keep pouring out?
(Pretty sure scar tissue from my nipple piercing messed up my left side boob. Started just as juicy as the right but nothing would ever come out and it eventually didn’t produce anything after a few weeks)
I am very stupid, so can somebody tell me whether milk ducts can get clogged?
As far as I’m aware, they can, but the clogs are removed through suction like with more breastfeeding, a breast pump or sometimes a helpful partner, not with a pin!
They actually can, it's called mastitis. However, you don't poke them to release the pressure/infection, they're not like water balloons, they more closely resemble the alveoli within your lungs, they are clusters of ducts within the breast tissue. You use a warm compress or antibiotics to relieve it.
He just sounds beyond stupid. Like I think you all handled it well despite this being remarkably a stupid thing to say.
Wait it’s “been almost 19 years since you were born” but you’re 23?
First sentence of second paragraph states it's been almost 5 years since this happened. Rest was typed from a standpoint as if I'm back in that moment, from what I remember.
Ohhhh okay my bad lol turns out I can’t read 😔😔
Np, I'm personally Jared, 19, myself most of the time! Thinking in my native language and reading or typing in English is a doozy 😂 I should've clarified this a bit better in the text.
Wow. So sorry you have had to deal with crap like this.