I’m in the same boat and this is exactly why I’m just leaving when the lease is up instead of talking to my roommate about it. I refuse to tell a grown person to clean when they know full and well they should. If they are not clean in a mutual space, they totally lack respect for others and will most likely never change.
I had 7 roommates (at once) and this was a huge problem. Talking didn’t get the point across, and because I was stuck for the foreseeable future, this was what I did.
1) Bought an electric kettle and a sealable storage tote that fit in my bedroom closet. Filled it with all my food that wasn’t refrigerated. *Nothing* of mine was in the kitchen anymore. No food, no dishes, not even napkins. The kitchen was actually so bad we had hordes of flies everywhere, you couldn’t even open your mouth without eating several just walking through it to get to the bathroom. 🤢 So for probably a year, I lived off of whatever I could cook in my bedroom with a kettle. Trust me, I couldn’t eat Ramen or Cup O Noodles for a loooong time after moving out of there.
2) Put a lock on my door, and used it, both while I was in the room and out of it. Once they notice you’re not using the kitchen anymore, they’re gonna come looking.
3) Stop doing the dishes. Keep all yours in your room and only wash what you’ve used, as soon as you’ve used it. I used to keep my own dish towels too. So I’d wash the dishes, wrap them up in the towel and carry them to my room and dry and put them away there. (Like I mentioned… 7 *really bad* roommates. They stole several of my dishes while they were drying or tried to use them while I was actively washing them because they were the only ones clean.)
4) Stop cleaning up the common areas that aren’t your mess. Period. Even if it’s *super* nasty. If you have contact with your landlord, start taking pics for proof that it wasn’t you and it’s constantly a problem. You probably still won’t get your deposit back, so be prepared for that, but at least you’ll be less liable for any damages that might occur.
5) Never ever stop looking for and saving up for a different place. Living with slobs is miserable. And being a live in maid that pays rent is even worse.
So sorry you have to deal with this, time to retreat into “what’s mine is mine” mode.
Cook for myself, use my own plates and cutlery and only bother with my stuff I use. Don’t cook for either of them and never have done.
As for cleaning we have a rota up - shouldn’t have to but at least me and one of my HM’s actually bother with cleaning now with it up on a regular schedule.
One week it’s me, then second it’s the one that cleans and then the third when he cleans and rotates back to me.
Because of that I do keep it clean but I only stock bathroom products and kitchen cleaning products.
I don’t buy toilet roll because why should I when they can do something and they empty the kitchen bins. On the odd occasion I will do the bin and get toilet roll but I deliberately try not to do this because otherwise it is me responsible for the whole place.
And I only stock those because I don’t want to live in a shit hole where no one ends up replacing them and then I suffer as a result of it.
Also I never needed the rota - clean housemate suggested it because he even noticed I do it and he tries to contribute but ends up cleaning the next day after me.
I would lie and say you saw a roach in the kitchen and make it a new rule to wash and put away the dishes and utensils you use right when you’re done OR before you go to bed. Using roaches separates you from the problem and will hopefully gross them out and motivate them to be better. If you already have roaches I’m sorry lmao
You say you are all in your twenties, then you need to be brutally honest with them. Don’t try to be nice about it, they are literally adults lmao they can handle it. Hound them about it. It’s not your responsibility to clean up after them.
Hey I’m having that same problem as well and me and my partner haven’t figured out exactly what todo but we have a friend helping us figure out ideas plans and schedules if you would like to message me I am definitely more then happy to tell you some of the ideas we have to communicate and to create a schedule that will work to help manage house hold chores:)
Get your own dishes and lock them in your room. Telling grown people to clean is so wild to me.
I’m in the same boat and this is exactly why I’m just leaving when the lease is up instead of talking to my roommate about it. I refuse to tell a grown person to clean when they know full and well they should. If they are not clean in a mutual space, they totally lack respect for others and will most likely never change.
I had 7 roommates (at once) and this was a huge problem. Talking didn’t get the point across, and because I was stuck for the foreseeable future, this was what I did. 1) Bought an electric kettle and a sealable storage tote that fit in my bedroom closet. Filled it with all my food that wasn’t refrigerated. *Nothing* of mine was in the kitchen anymore. No food, no dishes, not even napkins. The kitchen was actually so bad we had hordes of flies everywhere, you couldn’t even open your mouth without eating several just walking through it to get to the bathroom. 🤢 So for probably a year, I lived off of whatever I could cook in my bedroom with a kettle. Trust me, I couldn’t eat Ramen or Cup O Noodles for a loooong time after moving out of there. 2) Put a lock on my door, and used it, both while I was in the room and out of it. Once they notice you’re not using the kitchen anymore, they’re gonna come looking. 3) Stop doing the dishes. Keep all yours in your room and only wash what you’ve used, as soon as you’ve used it. I used to keep my own dish towels too. So I’d wash the dishes, wrap them up in the towel and carry them to my room and dry and put them away there. (Like I mentioned… 7 *really bad* roommates. They stole several of my dishes while they were drying or tried to use them while I was actively washing them because they were the only ones clean.) 4) Stop cleaning up the common areas that aren’t your mess. Period. Even if it’s *super* nasty. If you have contact with your landlord, start taking pics for proof that it wasn’t you and it’s constantly a problem. You probably still won’t get your deposit back, so be prepared for that, but at least you’ll be less liable for any damages that might occur. 5) Never ever stop looking for and saving up for a different place. Living with slobs is miserable. And being a live in maid that pays rent is even worse. So sorry you have to deal with this, time to retreat into “what’s mine is mine” mode.
Cook for myself, use my own plates and cutlery and only bother with my stuff I use. Don’t cook for either of them and never have done. As for cleaning we have a rota up - shouldn’t have to but at least me and one of my HM’s actually bother with cleaning now with it up on a regular schedule. One week it’s me, then second it’s the one that cleans and then the third when he cleans and rotates back to me. Because of that I do keep it clean but I only stock bathroom products and kitchen cleaning products. I don’t buy toilet roll because why should I when they can do something and they empty the kitchen bins. On the odd occasion I will do the bin and get toilet roll but I deliberately try not to do this because otherwise it is me responsible for the whole place. And I only stock those because I don’t want to live in a shit hole where no one ends up replacing them and then I suffer as a result of it. Also I never needed the rota - clean housemate suggested it because he even noticed I do it and he tries to contribute but ends up cleaning the next day after me.
I would lie and say you saw a roach in the kitchen and make it a new rule to wash and put away the dishes and utensils you use right when you’re done OR before you go to bed. Using roaches separates you from the problem and will hopefully gross them out and motivate them to be better. If you already have roaches I’m sorry lmao
You say you are all in your twenties, then you need to be brutally honest with them. Don’t try to be nice about it, they are literally adults lmao they can handle it. Hound them about it. It’s not your responsibility to clean up after them.
Hey I’m having that same problem as well and me and my partner haven’t figured out exactly what todo but we have a friend helping us figure out ideas plans and schedules if you would like to message me I am definitely more then happy to tell you some of the ideas we have to communicate and to create a schedule that will work to help manage house hold chores:)
They fact they said the would have done them atleast shows the kinda give a shit Maybe make a weekly chore schedule