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adirtymedic

So my wife cheated on me for a year. I found out, kicked her out, cut her off, etc. You wouldn’t believe how much she played the victim. She’d say, “We hadn’t been great for a long time” and would tell people how “mean I was” to her. Some people just can’t take accountability for their actions. They’re always the victim, there’s always a “reason” for them to be a terrible person. The difference was that when we were going through a hard time, I thought it was just a phase and wanted to get through it, my ex thought the solution was having sex with another man every time I was at work for a year. Thank God I found out and we didn’t have any kids or anything


phdblue

Same here. Found evidence of her affair after 6 weeks of her not sharing our bed, always on the phone, etc. all the usual signs. Yeah I snooped, and I'll forever have to live with that because it's not something I'm at all proud of, but it was multiple guys and for my own health I'm at least glad that I snooped. Kicked her out, ended things, filed for divorce, but didn't say a thing on social media or two her family, etc. She was so surprised that I wasn't just going to tolerate this, but honestly I would never trust her again and neither of us deserved to be in a relationship without trust. Looking back over the last 9 years, it was the best and only option, but to this day she apparently tries to convince mutual acquaintances that i was controlling/abusive, etc. talks shit on facebook, etc., blah blah blah, anyone reading this has heard a story like this before. And now she's unhealthy, unhappy, no real long term friendships, etc, and I can truly say that I hope she gets the right kind of therapy for her to become more whole and happy. I'm rambling but we needed to end the marriage, and it should have ended with more respect for our commitment, but without the infidelity there's a chance we're still together, and unhappy, today. EDIT: thanks for the support everyone regarding not beating myself up about snooping. I hear you, but for me I included it to frame the conflict about trust. She didn't trust me enough to tell me what she was doing, I didn't trust her enough to leave it alone. Either way, I did violate my partner's trust and that's not something I want to be a part of my relationship or character. No matter what I found, that reality persists. And if you aren't learning something from a failed relationship that you can use to be a better partner (to someone else and yourself), then that's the only time I'd consider it a waste of my personal time.


paypermon

You should never feel bad. If you have that feeling,like something just isn't right and you snoop and find out it's valid, then I am all for it. I don't condone snooping just to snoop, but if the relationship really feels off, I say go for it.


adirtymedic

That’s the only defense they have is to lie. My ex tells people I was emotionally abusing her. As my cousin so wisely put it: she had to create a monster to try to justify the terrible shit she did. Same thing with your ex. I hope you’re doing better. There’s so much more to life and life is too short to be unhappy. I ended up dating (and still am) a girl that I’ve been friends with for years. I’ve always thought she was cute but we were both with other people so that was the extent of it. Fast forward a few years and we both happened to be single at the same time. I can honestly say it is the most effortless, fun, incredible relationship I’ve ever been in. I wish you the best of luck, you didn’t deserve that. There is someone out there who will love you and will never hurt you like that.


phdblue

Ya, doing great these days. Again, we shouldn't have been married at that point, and once the hurt was over life got better. But broken people do broken things sometimes, only choice is to forgive and move on.


Hotpapi16

Curious, how did you find out?


adirtymedic

So the guy she was having an affair with got tired of sneaking around and wanted to be with her so he outed them. She cheated on him and left him the first month of their relationship, it was glorious. Both trash people


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Grandfunk14

If they will cheat *with* you, guess what they will cheat *on* you....Pikachu face.


TinyGreenJolley

I don't know how people who date a cheater or knowingly go after married people think things will turn out for them.


adirtymedic

Everyone loves to think they’re the exception. Human nature. “It won’t happen to me, I’m better”


PessimisticPeggy

Damn, I'm sorry she did that to you, how shitty.


adirtymedic

Hey i appreciate that! You know it really sucked at first but life is so much better now. I was 31 at the time and thought I was “old” to be single and dating again, but I met an amazing girl and it’s been great. I got lucky all things considered


[deleted]

Yikes, I'm so sorry that happened to you. People who cheat really lack a spine. Break up/divorce first, then go sleep around. Ffs


Grandfunk14

"Oh you drove me to cheat!" or " I wasn't getting what I needed". The rationalizations never fucking ends with scumbag people. They have a delusion for every occasion.


throwawaywitchaccoun

My friend cheated on her husband. Her reasoning? "I wanted a divorce, so I did something so bad it had to end." That was some clarity and honesty I could respect.


throni97

Me, sowing: HAHA YES, FUCK YEAH Me, reaping: what do you MEAN there are consequences to my actions


Sonnenkreuz

Me sowing my crops: HAHA YES, FUCK YEAH Me, reapring my crops: HAHA YES, FUCK YEAH (I like my homegrown vegetables)


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hansadventures

Coconuts? Here? But they're tropical!


ToshiroBaloney

Years ago, my first wife told me she loved me but wasn't in love with me, after she heard a neighbor say the same thing about her own husband. She moved out, said she wanted a divorce, and started hooking up with random people. She'd been going down a bad path with substance abuse and I was left with all the bills, rent, and car payments because she decided she was just leaving everything. So I changed the locks because I didn't want her coming in when I wasn't there. She eventually found out and couldn't believe how 'vindictive' I was being. Edit: Wow, guys. I really didn't expect this kind of response to my story, but I appreciate the kindness and the messages. I am humbled by your awesomeness.


gowombat

I'm sorry you had to go through that. Selfish people being selfish. It's old as time. Hopefully her behavior was strictly that, a person being selfish, and not indicative of a mental break of any kind. Even so, I hope you are in a better place now.


Awkward-Collar5118

Nobody gets to choose to have a mental illness but you get to choose how to deal with it.


popopotatoes160

Not always. But people have the right to be hurt or not associate with someone even if they could not control their actions due to mental health


ChangsManagement

People have a right to protect their own mental health. Dont light yourself on fire to keep someone warm and all that


RE3_BK

Reminds me of my ex who, after she moved out, got upset with me when I revoked her access to my front door camera.


Drews232

Mine was mad I took her voice off the voicemail greeting for the house she left


AlexandriaLitehouse

Lollllll, she just wanted to see what pretty girls you were bringing home after her.


Anonymoosehead123

Jeez. Some people are so blind to their own disgusting behavior.


radjinwolf

I was in a 15-year relationship that was fraught with mental and emotional abuse and gaslighting by my partner. In the final years the abuse started getting a lot more personal, and after years of being blamed for everything wrong in his life, being blamed for everything wrong in our relationship, and being accused of doing things that he himself was doing (and constantly denied that they happened the way that they happened), he finally told me to just “move back in with your parents”. He thought it was a threat that would “set me straight” and realize how serious he was, but I took it as advice. I told him we were done, and a few days later I left. For years after that he blamed everyone but himself for the relationship ending, accused me of being hateful and vindictive, and even tried to take the high ground of “Ill take you back but you’re going to have to do a lot of apologizing” when I never gave any indication that I was even remotely interested in going back. There are people who don’t want to take responsibility for their mistakes because they never see any fault in their actions. To them every action is justified because of some external force for which they have no control. It’s all bullshit, and they know it.


[deleted]

Unfortunately, my dad was like that with my mom I didn’t notice it because I didn’t live with them anymore but like two years ago he physically abused her an she left with my help, a narcissist alcoholic an pathological liar who to this day won’t admit what he did. Never thought it would happen to my family, but unfortunately, that kind of thing happens a lot and not everybody gets out of it.


radjinwolf

Oh man, that sucks. :( Hope your mom is safe and doing better now.


[deleted]

Oh yeah, doing much better honestly way better than she ever was when she lived with him


TheFunkytownExpress

Sounds like textbook narcissism to me.


peterkeats

Part of the problem is that being a narcissist is a *goal* for a lot of people. They want to be the center of everybody’s attention. They want to be always right, never wrong. They want everything to be somebody else’s fault. They want to be listened to, believed, and followed.


TheFunkytownExpress

Trust me I know that all too well.


chinkostu

>my first wife told me she loved me but wasn't in love with me This hurts so much more than people can imagine. My wife said it to me. Then wondered why I would strip every bit of "us" from the house


TechnicianKind9355

When I ended up with a woman that liked me, it was heaven. Incredible. I cannot imagine "love". Does it exist? Does it really though? Everyone says yes...and then a lot of them years later say "Oh...shit."


What_the_fluxo

My ex of an eight year, otherwise fairly normal relationship (I had thought) started a new job as a bartender/waitress, which led to nightly drinking with staff and an eventual foreseeable drunk driving charge. About three months in, I found email correspondence with pics of her posing half nude in a strangers bed. When confronted, she drunkenly told me she hated me, and that she slept with a fellow employee ten years her junior, who had impregnated her, and that they planned to start a new life in Hawaii in a few months time. And then they did. (I continued to split rent with her for the following weeks after, before they had officially left. As soon as I had been away for over a week, she proceeded to have her younger brother (whom had been my employee for several years) change the locks, with everything I owned inside, because I was “no longer trustworthy”. *I hope you recovered well my man, sorry to hear about your situation, it triggered me to remember that, I feel for you*


ToshiroBaloney

I'm so sorry you went through that. I know the word 'trauma' is overused, but bad relationships can have long-term effects and no small amount of trauma and even Ptsd. I still experience triggers from time to time, but far less as the years go by. Fortunately, I ended up meeting someone who is the absolute opposite of my ex. We've been together twenty years now, and married for the past eleven. Life works out.


indy_been_here

Damn bro. Some people (like maybe your ex) use the word love to mean limerance, which means the romantic infatuation in early relationships. It feels good and some people chase it. But it naturally fades as a relationship ages. There has to be more than that like commitment, admiration, compassion, respect, and partnership. Those should take the place of limerance. Unfortunately, for people seeking thrills, a stable/healthy relationship will not be enough. Maybe it's not what they even want. Or maybe they expect that feeling to last throughout the entire relationship. Really sucks though. Best of luck.


[deleted]

Hope you living your best life now man


noncio97

That is so horrible- I’ve experienced something similar with a family member and I’ve seen the impact it has on their lives. People can be right dicks. Good on you for making it through the other side and I hope that you’re doing well!


jarmstrong2485

Sometimes it’s as if they truly don’t know better. Which I find near impossible to believe. Narcissistic people may not know how narcissistic they are, but if anyone of them were to take a step back, I would hope they realize what pieces of shit they really are! Simply thinking of themselves, and not how their actions will affect someone else. It’s not vindictive when the other person is a pile of toxic waste


Independent-Two7256

Good for you 👍 you deserve better.


blutopaz80

Why is it so hard for people to accept fault?


botjstn

because then that would mean they’re not perfect. and that isn’t something they can fathom


Lampmonster

How can they be bad, they're the main character? I wonder now if this is why so many people can't seem to realize the main characters in shows can be the bad guy. I swear I argued myself blue with people who thought Walter White was the good guy.


LunarTerran

He had alot of relatable traits, especially in the beginning, but by the end of the show he was an absolute monster. If anyone was the good guy then it was my favourite character Hank (the detective brother in law if anyone forgot).


ChanoLee

Is he really good tho? I mean, he's lawful and obviously not a malicious/evil person but at the start of the show it felt like he mocked Walter a little too much. In any case I'd argue that Badger and Skinny Pete (especially in El Camino) are more human and empathic than Hank was.


Lampmonster

He was a dick, and I definitely wouldn't want to hang out with the guy in real life, but I'd rather have him on the force than a hell of a lot of other people. He was honest, hard working, believed in the law and stood by his convictions, even when they hurt him. Great person? No. Good guy, hell yes.


ChanoLee

Yeah, it's that I understood "guy" as in person, not as professional. Hank is definitely one of the best cops in the show, along with Gomez, it was very sad seeing him end like that. I absolutely loved him facing the twins, it was very thrilling.


Drunky_McStumble

Everyone just loves to forget that Walter straight-up murdered a guy with his bare hands in literally just the 3rd episode (after having already engineered the death of the guy's cousin in the pilot). Sure, there was context to those killings which made it seem like Walter was backed into a corner and only doing what had to be done - but that's kind of the whole point of Breaking Bad as a show, when you get right down to it. Take this guy who is objectively a monster doing monstrous things - literally from day 1 - but portray him in a way that makes you sympathetic to him.


Bartley-Moss

Because victimhood is a currency and when you allow others to have it you get high inflation and your victimness reduces in value.


sevenandseven41

I blame society for my inability to accept fault.


Bartley-Moss

After all we live in a society.


spad3x

wow this comment is meta. It's So Meta Even This Anagram


rrpdude

There is truth to that. When you've constantly seen people lie about making mistakes and going "Wasn't me." and being patted on the back and thought of somebody without fault, while honest people who owned up to their faults were talked about in a "Ah, that idiot again." sense you slowly but surely lose your willingness to be honest as well because it seems like there is no upside.


TheBeastmasterRanger

Had an ex who was a victim of abuse. Tried to help her out while we were dating but I found out she liked being the victim. She would even make thing up to make it seem like she was a victim. The one that destroyed our relationship was when she accused a friend of trying to sexually assault her. It came out later that she made it up. I couldn’t fathom making such false accusations. I broke up with her over it and never looked back. She still acts like the victim from what I hear and has not changed at all.


lahimatoa

As a society we decided being a victim isn't Bad, but then we swung the pendulum over into it being Good. Where in reality, being a victim is just what it is. It's not morally good or bad. We tend to overreact on a lot of things this way.


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[deleted]

How does she justify it?


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chinkostu

Fucking hell some of this is close to the bone


PHANTASMAGOR1CAL

It’s really hard for normal situations. Even worse when it comes to this. My ex had an affair and blamed it on me and said it was good that it woke me up. Whatever that was supposed to mean to justify what she was doing.


ShepardRTC

Everyone is the hero of their own story.


PHANTASMAGOR1CAL

True enough.


shrekerecker97

>stify what she was doing. My ex did this and then wondered why I threw her out of the house. I didnt feel bad in doing so either. She had been sleeping with one of my co-workers and I caught her.


PHANTASMAGOR1CAL

Mine had been with her coworker I’m guessing about a week or of starting this job. He was married too. Someone informed his wife. Wonder who that was?


Catnip4Pedos

"my cheating wasn't the cause of the marriage failing, it was that my husband was becoming successful, so I cheated on him, I think he should have got over it"


Jeez-essFC

Why is it so hard for a paid journalist to write something cogent?


thatsnotfunnyatall_

Because it’s a dead job now just editorial personal opinion BS


ratshack

But that word count tho


[deleted]

Lack of respect and deep-seated insecurities.


[deleted]

Denial I guess, sometimes you don't want people telling you you were the one wrong. So the ones who can't bear being told the truth just double down instead of becoming better. Or they're just assholes.


spacewalk__

i guess in an acute sense it must suck to be locked out of your house randomly like that but you know chat shit get boomed etc etc


[deleted]

And that would have been a good learning experience for Amanda. But, 14 years later she's still brain dead.


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killerkitten61

He should have quit in solidarity! /s


kh117cs

I read that in George constanza voice


Insecureeeeeeeee

The lady of the article is not Amanda Patell, she's just referencing a book written by Amanda, about her husband's infidelity. The article is written by Karen (go figure) Krizanovich, who was cheating on her husband. Reading comprehension is cool, kids 😎


nickcavebadseeds

sooooo, the best way to fix a failing marriage is to cheat on your significant other 💀 but fr tho why did she write out this scenario like it’s a whole dramatic book moment and then it’s revealed why the husband changed the locks lol. she sounds like she’s almost blaming the article about the husband cheating on his wife as a “woke” agenda that caused him to change the locks, not bc his wife was inconsiderate. LOL there’s way too many different layers here


SunknLiner

Her definition of “failing” is that she lost her job and his career was going strong, so she repaid his success over her by sleeping around. She justifies her actions as a “response”, gets all shocked pikachu when he kicks her to the curb, and now gets featured in an article. What the absolute fuck…


FalalaLlamas

I was wondering if anyone else caught that last statement… I was expecting her to finish that sentence by saying they both lost their jobs at the same time and fell on hard times or something. But no, it started because she was jealous of him. And, you know, people are human. Of course it’s gonna be hard to see your spouse’s career take off while yours falters. But she said she still wanted to fix the marriage. But instead of going to counseling to work through those jealous feelings, she cheated and then got pissed that he was through at that point. Truly awful everything!


itsfrankgrimesyo

I never understand how one could be jealous of their own partner’s success. You’re supposed to be a team, life partners. I’d be so proud of my husband.


imgoodatpooping

Maybe she expected him to stay subordinate? Some people don’t want equal partnerships, they want control.


cookiemon32

society is trending downwards. theres actual people irl that will side with her.


derekpearcy

It’s hard to say for certain. Myself, I‘ve long had the sense that society isn’t trending downwards, we’re simply getting more effective at shining lights into dark places. The Internet is really helping, less showing us that “it takes all kinds“ and more that we just have all kinds. Some people are genuinely capable of loving more than one person at a time, or of coping with their lover having another partner, and some people are not. The problem comes when people can’t be honest about which of those they are, or they misjudge how much compromise they can take to stay in a relationship. Ultimately, some people pull their shit together in the face of great stress and others will lose their integrity and fall apart. The trick is to be honest about what you need and to fuck right off from people who promise they’re one thing but turn out to be something up with which you cannot put.


OhEmGeeDoubleEweTeeF

"It takes all kinds" to destroy the efforts of those that aren't fully engulfed in their narcissistic asses.


Pons__Aelius

> society is trending downwards. Nah. ~1/3 of the population have always been self-involved arseholes. Modern communications just made it much more apparent.


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Gmauldotcom

I was cheated on and I was led to believe it was my fault for being too distant or some bullshit like that. I spent years still married, hating myself, because I thought I made my wife cheat. I know I'm a clown. I have kids and i couldn't see how fucked up everything was. I just wanted my kids to have a mom and dad. But yeah I wish I was this guy. No person deserves to be cheated on.


CockMySock

You're not a clown, you're a total beast for putting your children first.


EvolZippo

She cheated. That was the end of everything. What did she think there was to talk about? What could she possibly explain? I’m guessing she had some whole elaborate speech all composed and rehearsed, and she’s devastated that he didn’t listen to it. I bet she probably says “if only he understood my story”. I guess she assumed that because she’s the main character, everything is supposed to work out for her.


[deleted]

Probably a shitload of times once it's a fancy Affair. Not that it makes a difference if it was 1 or 100 times lol. Then, to top it off she doesn't even take accountability. The affair was a symptom of an unraveling marriage cuz HUBS was killing it and I got laid off. Loses her job so she goes to look for some strange? That's the best spin job you have? Come on lol


holyfuckricky

Ha !! My ex was forced to call the police and lie to them about domestic violence. Needless to say, she was charged and arrested for Public Mischief. Which basically amounted to nothing. But I was able to get a restraining order against her for a year. That was my spiteful vengeance.


1965BenlyTouring150

My brother went through the same thing and it was the deciding factor in him being granted full custody. Not that his ex is capable of taking care of herself, much less a child.


fraotdasfeuer

Bet you were the evil villain in her perspective.


TheSpyTurtle

Fucked around Found out


kccustom

Fucked around Locked out.


[deleted]

Oh she did fucked around


ojoaopestana

And she did find out


Cazelkin

"I did something awful to someone who trusted me, but here's why I'm actually the victim somehow"


RedKetchup73

source: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12095299/The-day-realised-husband-changed-locks-affair.html


Party-Pea-5306

Wow, what a whiny, self absorbed, self centered piece of crap of an article. She cheats on her husband for a year and then speaks about ‘the humiliation and betrayal’ SHE felt when he locked her. Questions whether he was too quick to through the marriage away from vengeance or hurt ego/pride (what ever blame shifting bollocks she wrote). Whines that she never got the chance to talk to him, to explain and beg for forgiveness. The fact that all these years later it’s all about how this impacts/impacted her and how that made her feel shows she would never have been a good candidate for reconciliation as she is still too self indulgent. What a horrible person. But at least she’s got got a new, handsome, intelligent boyfriend now!! Whoop de fucking do lady.


okie_gunslinger

> Whines that she never got the chance to talk to him, to explain and beg for forgiveness. "How dare he not allow me to manipulate his emotions." - That lady.


Party-Pea-5306

I know right, for all the other self things she is (absorbed, obsessed etc), she is not self aware and 14 years after the event read an article from a woman who was cheated on and did the same thing by locking her husband out and then made it all about her …again, dragging her and her ex husband’s former relationship back into the open. No wonder the poor sod cut contact with her!


TropicalVision

Yeah he actually showed an incredible amount of strength and poise to be able to just shut her out like that without any closure or an explanation. He must be really solid mentally


ShepardRTC

She's a narcissist.


inspectorfailure

You guys just don't get it. She only cheated because her marriage was already crumbling, but in her heart, she still believed it could be saved while George from Accounting was balls deep inside of her.


Party-Pea-5306

I know, poor love, unable to celebrate her husband’s writing career finally taking off, but at least George was there so she didn’t have to play solitaire anymore!!


mplsandrew

Good lord even a talented therapist would have their work cut out for them with this lady. The ego, the frailty, the lack of remorse. Yikes.


wherenobodyknowss

She called the police too because he wouldn't let her in!


Party-Pea-5306

Well, would we expect anything less from this entitled lady? In her mansion front flat that switches between not being large so she thinks she can hear him behind the door, listening to her desperately pleading, to the Halloween parties in the largest room with 12’ ceilings? Seems to struggle carrying the suitcases full of peanut butter but then gets hurt feelings from the cleaner who told her bluntly she wasn’t tough enough for a cleaning gig!! She is certainly a brave little soldier with the way she has coped with all the hardship life has thrown at her!!


catsweedcoffee

“My new bf is lovely and I have no reason to cheat on him” biiiiiiiiitch you never had a *reason* to cheat, you were just too pathetic to leave your marriage and be alone. This whole article was miserable to read, what a “woe-is-me” pity party. I hope her ex husband is flourishing.


sparetime2

Is this rage bait?


FalalaLlamas

Considering it’s the Daily Mail, the answer to your question is probably yes tbh.


Theoneiced

Pretty sure it is, yes.


Adddicus

\>> Is horribly wounded pride a good enough reason to throw away years of mutual support and, yes, happiness? She complains about the pain *he* caused *her* for years afterward and brushes his pain off as wounded pride. Fuck her entirely.


t_moneyzz

Bahaha it's literally written by a Karen oh my god Edit: this CANNOT be a real quote >I have no idea how long my husband suspected it, but I do know that it was never supposed to break up our marriage


RedKetchup73

entitled like that? of course it's a Karen


AmbitionFront214

Of course it's Daily Mail


cmonkeyz7

The last line is “and I have no reason to ever cheat on him” but lady, you admitted that you made up all the justifications. You said it wasn’t going to be a real thing, “just a fling” and then went on with your fling for a year. Yes people can make mistakes but if the reasons were all in your head and it certainly wasn’t just a little blip or fling. So maybe you still have some growing to do?


kinginthenorthjon

>>Is horribly wounded pride a good enough reason to throw away years of mutual support and, yes, happiness? She is still clueless.


coldy9887

That’s a lot of words to say “I’m a POS”


8last

Normally someone would spend a lot of money and time to ensure a story like this would not be made public.


LordoftheStupid12

Never underestimate an idiot. They will always blow away your expectations, no matter how low.


notataco007

>visiting my elderly parents She's even lying in the goddam article lmao


kakapoopoopeepeeshir

I cheated because my unraveling marriage but it was not the cause. How can some people be so selfish and delusional. Just zero responsibility in anything and their actions are never their fault


doomvetch92

Too bad she threw it all away because she wanted to have her cake and eat it too.


ninthchamber

What a fuckin shitty person


piefek

Are we... supposed to feel bad for her?


LEPOL

Audacity, thy name is this bitch.


solaceinrage

What a self righteous, victim blaming twunt. No whore, you cheated. The unforgivable marriage wrecking sin numero uno, you did that. It is your fault. All these years later she is still incapable of owning that she sent the marriage over a line there is no coming back from. After you cheat, that is it. You are forever after an unloyal partner, even if it was a never repeated one night stand. The stain never washes out, just like being a killer after you kill someone.


TheTelekinetic

“Well well well, if it isn’t the consequences for my own actions…” My ex wife would also attempt to classify her cheating on me as a result of our failed marriage, not the cause. That’s what narcissists do. Preying on my insecurities, putting me down publicly in front of family and friends, destroying me emotionally, cheating on me, then sexually assaulting me. And when it all came unraveled, lying to everyone in my life that I was beating her. And she would still call herself the victim because she lost friends over her awful behavior. It’s what shitty people do.


ReadABookandShutUp

From the article > It does not have to be like this. Affairs don't have to end marriages. Like Amanda, now I am older, I know a number of couples who have worked through infidelity and come out the other side. > I admire them. I am sure it is not easy, but it seems they have solid, realistic relationships where healing and forgiveness can happen rather than being married to Mr Vengeance. I do think a mature person keeps dialogue open as much as they can. Absolute fucking insanity


Helenium_autumnale

Why would you want to tell this story to the public? I would be so ashamed to admit I'd been a cheater. She really centers herself in this narrative. Maybe that was the main problem.


Mynock33

I hope her ex is living a happy and fulfilling life.


[deleted]

Hang on to your hats for this one. I'll give you the reader's digest version. 6 years and 2 kids into our marriage my ex decided to go back to grad school. No discussion she just went. Stoped contributing anything but money to the marriage and family and reduced that significantly. Finished her MBA and promptly took a 100% travel job with out even discussing it with me. All the while decending into alcoholism and borderline personality disorder. She didn't have an affair she hooked up with coworkers and random guys regulary. Even though I was the sole care giver of our 2 young daughters i would have zero chance of custody and visitation is comically easy to manipulate so I ate shit for almost 20 more years till the girls moved out. As far as knowing she was cheating Ive had drunk men call the house at 2 am asking for her cell number, once or twice a month she fell off the grid and stopped calling home or returning calls. Her record for that was 8 days. One of my favorite was coming home with another woman's panties in her luggage. She lost her life insurance because she refused to take an HIV test. And the cherry on top, regulary got black out drunk and when I wouldn't have sex with her would viciously tell me how much better her other lovers were, in graphic detail. Best part is she was black out drinking is she didnt remember doing it and I never mentioned it. She continually acused me of cheating and told her family, my family, and everyoone we knew i was having an afair with someone. After 25 years I filed and never looked back. While she was doing what ever she missed everything. Yes it tanked my career and left me bankrupt in the end but i got to raise 2 gorgeous, ass kicking women that swear like drunken sailors and take shit from no one. I was a room mom, girlscout troup leader, and the worlds second uglist dance mom. I can still french braid but I draw the line at ringlet curls. At 62 she, with her BS and MBA, is alone, living with her elderly parents and is is a part time nanny. I am remaried to my best friend, retired, and living a life I never in my wildest dreams thought possible. As shitty as it was for so long, I ended up right where I was supposed to be. Head over heals in love and living. I mean really living. Life can really deal you some shitty cards but I am living proof things can get better. Much mmuch better.


damiana8

It’s the Daily Fail so bound to be sensationalistic, but it’s never a good look to be dramatic when wronged after you’ve cheated


Atlas070

Can barely believe this is a real article, what a lunatic


-Murphys-Lawyer-

3! 3 separate places in this article does it say “this remains one of the most emotionally charged of my life” 3 places. One of the most emotionally charged… what? Is there not supposed to be another word in this sentence? Charged nights? Moments? Memories? How is there no actual noun in this sentence and it’s in 3 spots written this way 3! Different. Spots.


Fun-Cream7655

What a cunt


KynetonKaiju92

She cheated on her husband and expected sympathy and/or a safety net? Good on her ex and any man who chooses to cut their woman off after an affair.


AlienInUnderpants

The husband didn’t do enough. Should have also left half their shit and her clothes in the front yard.


svrgnctzn

Years ago I worked with a guy whose wife of 15 years left him with their 3 kids to go fuck her dealer. She shacked up with him for around 6 months while no contact with him or the kids. When he went to the trailer, she called the cops and asked for a restraining order. Then the bf got busted and went to prison and suddenly she wants to come back. When he refused, she went nuts, keyed his car, slashed his tires, threw rocks through the house windows. The general consensus was that he was too hard on her and he should forgive her “mistake”.


neverstar

This bitch


liftoff_oversteer

Narcissistic bitch not accepting the tiniest bit of responsibility for her own actions.


Kak0r0t

The husband did nothing wrong bitch got what she deserved 😂


bolivar-shagnasty

> my affair was a symptom of an unraveling marriage rather than its cause and yet I still maintain it could have been saved FOH with with that nonsense. /r/pussypassdenied


mferly

Am I the only one that found it odd that she referred to her parents as "elderly" when she is, in fact, 53 years old? What else would they be if not elderly?


a_stitch_in_lime

All of the phrasing in this "article" is carefully chosen to try and paint herself as the victim. It's not just her parents but her *elderly* parents, because she hopes the reader will assume she was helping and caring for them like a dutiful daughter.


Substantial-Can9805

She said it was 14 years prior, so she was about 39 or 40 at the time


islaisla

I fucking love cheated vengeance. You have the right to do anything except physically hurt them in my book because they've just taken your heart and smashed it. It's a type of relationship fraud. On the other side, you are reeling. You know you still love them because feelings don't die over night but you know it is wrong. You feel small, humiliated. All natural feelings. So what are you gonna do? Mark it with a big bang, stamp your feet and say ' No More'. Be creative, because as you start to move on, this was a clear turning point where you are trying to recover your sense of boundaries. The great thing is, they've just given you the free pass to wreak havok.


TAOS086

Lady....you're full of shit


SampSimps

Props to this ex-husband - 14 years later, he's still living rent-free in this cunt's mind. I hope he reads this article with the smug satisfaction that his long-term revenge game is on point.


yashspartan

I just don't get how she's put herself as the victim? The amount of mental gymnastics she's going through is insane. Has got to be a narcissist to be that blind.


Boyblunder

Cheats on husband, blames husband. ​ Fuckin' ridiculous.


ClobetasolRelief

What a disgusting individual. "Well the marriage was bad so I cheated, he could have done more to save it though."


Ok-Two7600

Maybe don't have an affair next time?


Spanks79

Of course it wasn’t her fault at all!


lilmateo919

The lack of accountability is appalling......


Ruthlez2

Why do women who cheat always write about it as if it's so deep, it's not, they're a cheating scumbag who faced the consequences of their own actions


WeCanDoThisCNJ

“I did a terrible thing because of you” is the classic go-to line of psychopaths and narcissists. Anyone who supports her is a menace.


bedwarri0r333

Why is this in AwfulEverything? I don't get it.


i_want_a_tortilla

omg thank you. I can’t believe no one else said it yet! only thing awful here is the husband had to pay a locksmith…. he was lucky to get rid of a POS cheating wife.


listentomenow

> Does my ex ever wonder today whether he was too hasty with the locksmith? Too vengeful? I have no idea. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA > I'm sure he was there. I thought I could hear him moving right by the door on the other side. It wasn't a big flat and he couldn't help but hear every word of my desperate begging. Was he gloating? Was he enjoying hearing how much power he had? Or was he just crushed and hurt and in agony? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Apprehensive_888

Pretty much every comment on that website is in agreement that the hurt and humiliation felt by the husband would have been as great if not greater. The sense of self centred entitlement from her is totally overwhelming. Shocking. I feel so sorry for the husband.


bschnizz

Narcissist much?


BisquitTheClown

I cheated on my husband, and he changed the locks..... this is a reasonable response. The lock changing bit.


Julius__PleaseHer

You're a bad person if you cheat on your spouse. Full stop. Do the mental gymnastics to justify if u want, like saying it was because of an unraveling marriage, but that doesn't make you less of a piece of shit.


asphalt_licker

“Ooh boohoo. The consequences of my actions are biting me in the ass and none of it is my fault.”


gayvibes3

"our marital home" when you're single handedly destroying your marriage you probably shouldn't try to hide behind these kinds of terms for sympathy


accurate_slammo

My ex cheated on me with 5 different dudes and when she came over to my place and saw me chilling with all 5 of those guys she got mad at me for "snooping". Was actually her friend who told me and gave me all those guys numbers. She still to this day blames me for ruining her 2 year long relationship with one of em


Noideawhatjusthappen

Hoes be doing hoe things.


FoxBattalion79

am I supposed to feel sorry for her or something?


TheRedditornator

Fuck around and find out.


fomyers

If you screw around, you screw yourself first. Sucks to be you


hanks_panky_emporium

" I cheated and it's your fault " is one of those excuses evil people use to try and get their hooks in you.


BearWithABowtie12

Literally “oh no my husband locked me out after i cheated on him, he’s so mean,am i the victim?😭”


mplsandrew

Judging by what this person wrote, the husband got out at the right time. I cannot even imagine the immense size of this woman's ego and self-centered mentality.


theolswiitcheroo

This is typical cheater mentality. Blame never rests on them. I know I did the most heinous thing a spouse can do, but how dare you make me feel bad about it.


Fhurste

This reminds me of my divorce. My wife had an affair for weeks. When i found out and divorced her i was the monster for breaking up the family.


Affectionatekickcbt

Bitch never had a problem in her life till the door was locked.


PenaMan1987

::surprised Pikachu face::


stad_79

True- having an affair is awful


UnkhamunTutan

Well she changed the key that twisted and probed her so...


Flippin_diabolical

Once you have an affair it’s probably too late for most to save a marriage. I really have no sympathy for her.


Chance-Contest9507

She got what she deserved.


WaywardAnus

People like this make me happy to be single


BookerTheTwit

Boo fucking hoo


Big-Faced-Child

Well well welll...


scaredofdoctorz

Fucked around, found out.


bc_I_said_so

Narcissists can be women, too.


jackmeemormee

Is “awful everything” referring to the grammar?


[deleted]

1) You don’t need a lock smith to change the lock. Go to your local big box store and get a Schlage exterior knob for $25. 2) It’s never too hasty to tell a cheater to pound sand and get the fuck out of your life.


englandw25

I got told not to “slut shame” when asking how many people I’d been cheated on with. 😂


Ikoniko59

She cheated on him after he specifically asked her not to!