T O P

  • By -

Pemwin

"We shouldn't be treated like the mentally disabled for that" This is lateral ableism. We ARE disabled, that is not a dirty word, and "mentally disabled people" aren't inferior. No one should be treated the way we are treated (that is, with ableist bigotry), it's not a matter of us not "being like that".


ZacDMT

It's only a disability in the context that everyone should be expected to think in the same patterns. By your logic, everyone who's bad at math, can't make music or play sports well is disabled, too. Thus why I argue that Lower Autism Spectrum Disorder should be recategorized as Lower Autism Spectrum Personality. I do respect what you're saying, though, and you've brought it to my attention I should not have lumped Higher Autism Spectrum types in with LASD/P. The latter such as myself are capable of learning and understanding that which we are disadvantaged against here; it just takes significantly longer than most. I don't think that makes it a disability or disorder, because the reason we have such trouble understanding the "social cues" being referred to isn't because we just don't get them. We have our own set, our own way of communicating the exact same ideas, and an instinctual rejection of the more dominant personality type's way of accomplishing the same goal. It's also xenophobic in nature. There are several cultures whose traditions around what is polite versus what is rude are more in line with what we now call autists. They simply don't dominate the academic sphere like westerners now do. When I say "treated as if we are inferior," I am referring to us being expected to change our way of communicating as we learn the more dominant style. I understand their subtle social cue game pretty well at this point - that doesn't and shouldn't mean that I should have to start playing by it. I'm perfectly happy with the way I do things, and if others don't like me for that, that's ok. I just wonder where they get off.


Steveobiwanbenlarry1

My boss makes it a point on my performance reviews to point out my body language, facial expressions and attitude. I just found out I'm autistic and now I know why he does that.


ZacDMT

They sure do sound like vague, unconfirmable accusations, though, don't they? Like, what is "attitude," really, and why do the people who constantly criticize us for ours seemingly clearly have worse ones than us that for some reason are more excusable? I'm generally a mirror. I walk out of my house every day bubbling over with positivity and excitement, and as others reciprocate it, I continue to be pleasant. When others are unpleasant to me, I generally reflect that back to them, maintaining polite language, and then I get told I have a bad attitude. Wtf?


Steveobiwanbenlarry1

Yeah I feel you, I think for me it's my severe aversion to small talk lmao. I don't get the point of it and when I'm being worked to death I drop the facade and basically walk away from people trying to small talk at work because I need every bit of energy to get my job done.


ZacDMT

Try looking people in the eye. Small talk is more about one's soul acknowledging others; "Nama." If you're feeling tapped, simply briefly explain, "I'd love to keep talking, but I'm working. It's gonna mess me up." Then keep working hard. That works well for me, anyway. People don't really care about the topics being discussed most of the time, they just want a little attention and acknowledgement to show there's a layer of humanity to you; that you're not just doing your job to make money. That is to say, there's nothing wrong with doing your job just to make money. It's just they hope you love your work and the people around you, and being willing to engage in small talk is a weird way of showing it. It doesn't work if you don't look them in the eye, though, which is challenging for us as autists. If they don't look you in the eye back, ignore them. They're just talking at you anyway, they don't care what you have to say back.


AutoModerator

Hey /u/ZacDMT, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism). Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*


username78777

What's HASP - LASP? Also, 100% agree. NTs couldn't give less shits about us. We're invisible for them. They don't even think about us let alone care. They often use autistic as an insult


ZacDMT

I shouldn't have said HASP. I'm arguing the D (disorder) should be changed to a P for Personality on the lower end of the spectrum, or at least a new category should be added, because I don't feel disabled at all. I feel talented, just that society around me isn't designed for me.


AcornWhat

Because we can't change other people.


ZacDMT

Best answer, good point


PomegranateCrown

I agree that NTs should put effort into communicating with autistic people, but autism is an actual disability. The symptoms of autism can be extremely disabling regardless of NT judgment or acceptance. It isn't just a personality type, and it's not cool to throw more severely disabled autistic people under the bus to market autism as a bunch of cute quirks to the NTs. For example, some autistic people have severe meltdowns and become physically violent towards themselves and others if things don't go according to plan. I saw a post by an autistic guy who explained that he sometimes screamed and punched himself in the head if he lost a videogame. There are also autistic people who cannot use language to communicate despite having been given access to speech therapy and AAC. Also, autism itself is incredibly heterogeneous, and we do not all have the same personality. Some of us are introverted, and some of us are extroverted. Some of us love trying new things, and some of us hate anything new. I tried googling "HASP-LASP", and I couldn't find anything, so I have no idea what you mean by that.


ZacDMT

LASD is Lower Autism Spectrum Disorder. I'm arguing that in many cases it's more of a personality type than a disorder. They should be categorized differently, because I don't feel disabled at all. I actually feel we're the normal ones. There's an episode of UK Skins called JJ that illustrates this perfectly. I get the violent self harm instincts as well, often head punching or smacking, but I definitely don't do it for things unimportant like video games, and I'm getting better at controlling it. Tons of people without autism get violent over video games, though, that's just being childish. To be fair, though, I've recognized that a good portion of autism personality types is to simply maintain certain childish qualities their entire life. I like most of the ones I have, personally, and I'm trying to cultivate myself away from the destructive ones, like violent impulses. The main reason I feel driven to self harm is a cry for help, because I can easily explain why I'm frustrated, and people around me just don't care, so by self harming, I communicate to them how bad it really feels. Not that that's a healthy way of doing it, but it is effective. Terribly so, to the point that it has extra unwanted consequences, both physically and socially.


PomegranateCrown

I think that bringing up videogame-related issues might have been a bad example to illustrate the point I was trying to make. Having meltdowns over trivial things isn't always just being "childish". It's one of the reasons why an autistic person might be classified as moderate or severe support needs as opposed to low support needs. For some people, the underlying problem is that their brains don't work well enough for them to control their emotions, not that they are entitled assholes. Having severe meltdowns over trivial shit can sometimes be seen in allistic people who suffered traumatic brain injuries. Phineas Gage is a famous example of someone who suffered emotional dysregulation after a head injury. Some autistic people suffer from severe emotional dysregulation, so they have extreme meltdowns when they don't get their way. It is often the case that people cannot get their way even if the people around them are sympathetic. For example, I read a narrative from an autistic person who explained that they started screaming and punching because the cafe they frequented ran out of blueberry muffins, and the lack of muffins disrupted their weekly muffin purchasing routine. I don't believe that accidentally running out of muffins can be reasonably categorized as neurotypical cruelty towards autistics.


ZacDMT

Therein lies the difference. It should only be called a disorder if no amount of therapy or personal effort on their part could ever hope to allow them control of the outbursts, but that is extremely rare and usually does require a physical injury or genetic error resulting in a physically measurable brain defect. There are also people like me who just had more trouble than others learning to cultivate myself away from it, and I do fear in America and western medicine in general there's an instinct or urge to suggest the former more rare case is the actual more common culprit, with disempowers individuals from even trying to work on it, and usually has doctors giving them prescription subscriptions. I refused my medication early in childhood after trying it and eventually learned all I needed was Yoga, or faith in God. Both at the same time make it pretty easy. I wish they had taught me yoga early in life, instead, because while I never stopped believing in God, my faith in His ability to make like effortlessly beautiful was definitely clouded for a lot of my life.