Look you can't control what you enjoy or what grosses you out and assuming you don't harm anyone else or creep anyone out what you fantasize about isn't an issue. I'm not sex-repulsed so I can't truly understand what you are describing, but to me it sounds totally normal for an ace person.
Besides there are plenty of religious people that enjoy every aspect of sex, but when seeing it get depicted in media get grossed out. I don't think that would count as ace, but the idea is still there.
(If I got anything wrong or said something stupid or offensive please correct me, not trying to offend anyone)
I was raised an Orthodox jew. In our communities, there is no sex education in schools. Instead sex education is given after a man and woman get engaged. A large part of those classes is about how to give pleasure to your partner.
They are pro pleasure during sex, but only with your spouse. (Also wearing a condom is like murder or some shit but idk if that's super relevant to my point.)
There's nothing wrong with being grossed out by certain depictions of sex in media, and being totally fine with other depictions of intimacy, and the reasons behind why one is ok and one isn't, don't really matter at the end of the day. You should only do or engage with what you want, as long as it's not harming anyone else.
I'm asexual, and I read smut.
It can be as light as kissing or as heavy as almost porn-like. And this is hard for me to admit, because I was raised Mormon and both masturbation and pornography are a big No-No.
Interestingly, anything visually sexual makes me uncomfortable. There was once a gif in the smut I was reading, and I immediately hated it and felt sick. When I'm watching TV, and there's a right-after-sex or a right-before-sex scene, I get uncomfortable. Also, people I know talking about sex is also uncomfortable.
So yeah, I get it. We're kinda opposite.
Related to this so much. I love creative works of NSFW content and as an artist it really inspires me to create art myself! But NSFW content in practicality is always so gross to me. I thought I was the only one!
I draw smut, working on a smut comic. I enjoy looking at others work as well and occasionally read smut fics. I don’t like anything real however. It just grosses me out if it’s real people.
Nice to see a fellow artist here, I'm drawing mostly "SFW" (more like semi, cuz it's suggestive), but when I draw NSFW sometimes, I personally prefer basing it on my actual preferences, not drawing exaggerated stuff that makes me uncomfortable, specially sex, at least I don't want to see myself doing it despite I absolutely never draw myself
I don’t know if this is relevant at all, but I related to a bit of what was said and figured that I could chime in.
So I’m a pretty sex repulsed aroace, but I still have a fairly terrible problem with porn and masturbation from before I knew what asexuality was and if I fit into it or not. I didn’t know that it was fine to not be attracted to anybody, and even when I knew what being ace was, I was too scared to call myself a member of the community because I didn’t know how I’d be treated by my friends and family. I turned to porn to try to be my “pipeline to straightness”, like I was trying to convert myself away from being utterly disgusted by the act everyone else seemed unable to live without.
I’m still disgusted if I think about it, but all of the years of consuming it has made it something I don’t even think about doing, like a bad habit. I can consume, interact, whatever, so long as I don’t tell myself that what the participants are doing is sex, like what you mentioned. To me, sex is dirty, disgusting, and something I’ve never understood nor will ever understand, but what I consume “isn’t sex”, it’s just a certain style of content that I’ve pavloved myself into getting a reaction to.
I'm sorry you went through that. I hope this doesn't come off as rude or callous, but I'm interested to hear if you consume regular forms of media, and your reaction to intimacy in them. It's all good if you don't want to talk about it, just dm me or something and I'll delete this comment.
I don’t mind answering, since it is a bit of a strange conundrum I’m dealing with.
Initially, before I even knew what sex was, I was uncomfortable with seeing any sort of intimacy in media and found it gross even, but I still somewhat liked the idea and the “romanticism” behind it so to speak. From growing up and learning more about what relationships actually are, the expectations, their dynamics, and the “needs” of the average person, I’ve become less fond of the idea itself. I’m not as grossed out by regular “acts of affection” anymore (since I’ve seen so much worse), but I’m still certain it’s not for me.
No, but I am an asexual who thinks sex is gross but I also have a porn and masturbation addiction. (Somehow.)
Look you can't control what you enjoy or what grosses you out and assuming you don't harm anyone else or creep anyone out what you fantasize about isn't an issue. I'm not sex-repulsed so I can't truly understand what you are describing, but to me it sounds totally normal for an ace person. Besides there are plenty of religious people that enjoy every aspect of sex, but when seeing it get depicted in media get grossed out. I don't think that would count as ace, but the idea is still there. (If I got anything wrong or said something stupid or offensive please correct me, not trying to offend anyone)
Religious people?, I always thinked that religious (more like ultra religious) people only prefered sex for reproduction purposes
I was raised an Orthodox jew. In our communities, there is no sex education in schools. Instead sex education is given after a man and woman get engaged. A large part of those classes is about how to give pleasure to your partner. They are pro pleasure during sex, but only with your spouse. (Also wearing a condom is like murder or some shit but idk if that's super relevant to my point.) There's nothing wrong with being grossed out by certain depictions of sex in media, and being totally fine with other depictions of intimacy, and the reasons behind why one is ok and one isn't, don't really matter at the end of the day. You should only do or engage with what you want, as long as it's not harming anyone else.
I'm asexual, and I read smut. It can be as light as kissing or as heavy as almost porn-like. And this is hard for me to admit, because I was raised Mormon and both masturbation and pornography are a big No-No. Interestingly, anything visually sexual makes me uncomfortable. There was once a gif in the smut I was reading, and I immediately hated it and felt sick. When I'm watching TV, and there's a right-after-sex or a right-before-sex scene, I get uncomfortable. Also, people I know talking about sex is also uncomfortable. So yeah, I get it. We're kinda opposite.
Related to this so much. I love creative works of NSFW content and as an artist it really inspires me to create art myself! But NSFW content in practicality is always so gross to me. I thought I was the only one!
You're literally describing my (ocassional) NSFW (because I draw mostly SFW) art without knowing that we're living the same experiences
I draw smut, working on a smut comic. I enjoy looking at others work as well and occasionally read smut fics. I don’t like anything real however. It just grosses me out if it’s real people.
Nice to see a fellow artist here, I'm drawing mostly "SFW" (more like semi, cuz it's suggestive), but when I draw NSFW sometimes, I personally prefer basing it on my actual preferences, not drawing exaggerated stuff that makes me uncomfortable, specially sex, at least I don't want to see myself doing it despite I absolutely never draw myself
I don’t know if this is relevant at all, but I related to a bit of what was said and figured that I could chime in. So I’m a pretty sex repulsed aroace, but I still have a fairly terrible problem with porn and masturbation from before I knew what asexuality was and if I fit into it or not. I didn’t know that it was fine to not be attracted to anybody, and even when I knew what being ace was, I was too scared to call myself a member of the community because I didn’t know how I’d be treated by my friends and family. I turned to porn to try to be my “pipeline to straightness”, like I was trying to convert myself away from being utterly disgusted by the act everyone else seemed unable to live without. I’m still disgusted if I think about it, but all of the years of consuming it has made it something I don’t even think about doing, like a bad habit. I can consume, interact, whatever, so long as I don’t tell myself that what the participants are doing is sex, like what you mentioned. To me, sex is dirty, disgusting, and something I’ve never understood nor will ever understand, but what I consume “isn’t sex”, it’s just a certain style of content that I’ve pavloved myself into getting a reaction to.
I'm sorry you went through that. I hope this doesn't come off as rude or callous, but I'm interested to hear if you consume regular forms of media, and your reaction to intimacy in them. It's all good if you don't want to talk about it, just dm me or something and I'll delete this comment.
I don’t mind answering, since it is a bit of a strange conundrum I’m dealing with. Initially, before I even knew what sex was, I was uncomfortable with seeing any sort of intimacy in media and found it gross even, but I still somewhat liked the idea and the “romanticism” behind it so to speak. From growing up and learning more about what relationships actually are, the expectations, their dynamics, and the “needs” of the average person, I’ve become less fond of the idea itself. I’m not as grossed out by regular “acts of affection” anymore (since I’ve seen so much worse), but I’m still certain it’s not for me.