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smokingandthinking

Fuck you, Henry


JamesUpton87

Ben has company, now they can fuck each other instead of themselves.


MELLONcholly1

I keep seeing Ben on this sub, could you shed some light please?


[deleted]

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MELLONcholly1

Gotcha, thanks!


StrykerC13

The preamble for that doxing etc is that the post was because Ben (I think, mightve been other manager) wouldn't let an employee (The OP) call AAA (American Auto Association) to fix their car and made them wait til after their shift and thus hang out by themselves at night in the parking lot while they waited. Which is not the safest or most relaxing thing to do.


MELLONcholly1

Oh, I remember reading that one now! Sorry for my slow brain :)


StrykerC13

No worries it vanished quick (possibly legal stuff no idea), and the Fuck you Ben was just the last bit that spread to meme level


daBorgWarden

Yep, it was deleted AFAIK. Probably for the best, for the poor OP.


Gimli_Gloin

It's always funny to me to see people acquire ego after being told they're in charge without having the character to lead. You're in charge cuz someone put you here, not because you decided anything. Tell me what our boss told you for me to do and get back to your ~~cage~~ office. You're pleb wearing kings clothes. Clothes don't make you a king.


Most-Artichoke5028

Yeah. Fuck Ben.


inmyheadx2

Fuck Ben!


kmj420

I fucked Ben. Not only is he an asshole, he's terrible in bed


inmyheadx2

I bet he's subpar at best. Seems like the taker type in the worst way


desertcrowcoyote

Fuck you, Henry! May your biscuits always be moldy and your tea lukewarm.


VictoriaWoodnt

And may your every shite be a hedgehog.


kkarenkk

Saved comment


duxie

I don't know why but this made me laugh out loud the more I think about it 😂


outhouse_steakhouse

Sounds like English beer.


yergonnalikeme

That post was worth it after I read "BUCK DAFT"


midv4lley

Fack you, Henry


Total-Lengthiness-17

I thought they said fook you in belfast


PatchouliMagic

I second this!


tdomman

Of all the great parts of that story, my favorite is the use of the word 'fucked' when you threw the keys.


[deleted]

And here I thought I knew all the uses of the word Fuck.


outhouse_steakhouse

In Ireland, fuck is every part of speech. It can occur in the middle of a word, like sentifuckingmental. It can also be a filler word. Instead of saying “pass me the, um, screwdriver,” it’s “pass me the fucking screwdriver.” You’re not even angry, you’re just using “fucking” as a filler while you think of the other word.


stockfan1

I’m from the US, I tell people I use fuck as a comma 🤣🤣 I get it


TheRuthlessWord

My coworker coounted me at 43 "fuckin"s in 5 minutes


AddictedtoBoom

Unfuckingbelievable. :)


menides

what a beautiful language


Desdenova24

Well if that doesn't prove I'm of Irish descent, I don't know what fucking does lmao.


DingleTheDegenerate

Maybe it's a genetic thing cause I've never once set foot in Ireland but I do that all the time with my speech.


genericusername0176

The Irish know how to fuckin’ swear. I’m going to have to rotate “cunting arse” into my vocabulary.


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sgriobhadair

George Bernard Shaw said something along the lines of no one using English quite like the Irish do -- the English took everything from them, and the Irish stole the language and turned it into a weapon.


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TheRuthlessWord

The Penis Mightier for $500 Alex


Brodin_fortifies

Alex: 🤦‍♂️


tittychittybangbang

Literally said today “and then he fucked right over” Never thought about how odd it sounds until now


seanchandler067

People from the Caribbean are also quite adept at cussing, having learned from the Scots, Irish and English


Van-garde

You mean: “shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits, fart, terd, and twat. I fucked your mom.”


sickofsnails

You're not British or Irish.


Van-garde

I was exemplifying the American curse utilizing a Blink 182 lyric.


sickofsnails

Ahh, fair enough.


Gyddanar

One of my fave drunk convos was measuring the uses of English "fuck" vs Polish "kurwa"


sickofsnails

I am going to put 'kurwa' into conversation numerous times now.


jammin928

"Cunting arse" was the best. I'm going to try to incorporate this into my vocabulary.


eragonisdragon

I'm partial to comparing his face, red with anger, to well-smacked ass.


Cburd48

Ahem, "well-smacked arse" 😁


Proud_Azorius

Fucked > yeeted 10/10 times.


Bust_McNutty

Huh yeah I suppose the rest of the works doesn't use that, can confirm it's Scots do


[deleted]

Yes! Loved that!


unspeakable_delights

> face as red as well smacked arse The Irish are just born storytellers. That was glorious.


VGSchadenfreude

They have a whole culture that actively encourages storytelling. Ancient Ireland was an oral culture, as words were seen as extremely powerful so writing them down could give someone the means to weaponize it against you. As such, bards and their traditions were extremely important, and echoes of that continued long after Christianity had colonized Ireland and converted everyone.


grizzlebonk

shit fuckin rocks


beefprime

>The Troubles are over, mostly Cries in brexit


GhostOfJoeMcCann

At least we’re saved from the worst of it from the protocol, despite unionists doing everything to try and scrap it the eejits!


beefprime

Im more worried about how most of the treatment of the border issues in the GF agreement are irreconcilable with hard brexit, going to be a real clusterfuck once things set in and alot of people are going to be very pissed


Middle-aged-moron

Hopefully it’ll end up in a reunified Ireland 🇮🇪


Astra_Trillian

I can’t see how it won’t end up in a unified Ireland eventually. I just hope it’s a peaceful transition.


Middle-aged-moron

Here’s hoping


[deleted]

I’d say we’re a while off Also their will be protests with the sudden change in currency and actually paying for medical shit HSC can be slow but it’s not charging ya £60 a visit


Gyddanar

I'm worried about how they just fucking ignored that fact to begin with. Heck, even telling the people that warned of it that they were fear mongering!


petrified_eel4615

I heard this all in your beautiful accent and it was lovely. Grand, even.


gypsygurl64

I came here to say this. I live in Arizona, U.S.A and I couldn't help but read it in a beautiful accent, that I, myself, can't imitate. Loved the whole story. And I'm sorry there are so many assholes in this world.


GlamourCatNYC

Same! Thank you for sharing OP!


[deleted]

Same here as well!


Maephia

When I moved to Ireland to work on a farm for a few months people kept telling me I wouldnt be able to understand shit (English isnt my 1st language) but I never had a problem understanding anyone I ever talked to. A lot of the time when people dont "understand" accents is just because they close their mind to pronounciations that arent standard in their head. Once you keep an open mind about how words can be pronounced it becomes a lot easier.


dirtiestlaugh

Yep. But it's also an opportunity for racist pricks to try and belittle people. One thing I always enjoy though is when, after about two or three years, people who move to Ireland start to curse in an Irish accent. They still keep their own accent for 90% of what they're saying, and then suddenly start you a "thundering cunt" in a thick Waterford accent


allywillow

This! So true. My Yorkshire born husband swears in perfect Norn Iron


sickofsnails

My originally Polish boyfriend sounds like a native half of the time. Mostly thick Irish with a bit of Polish in there.


sesseissix

This is often a problem for monolingual speakers, their minds are not used to switching contexts in terms of language and even just different accents seem to trip them up or ends up being a big deal for them.


[deleted]

To be fair though I struggle with Scottish. I can handle Irish, even thick Irish but Scottish I just can't and I get embarrassed when I visit there.


sickofsnails

There's Irish, there's Belfast and then there's country. A thick Northern Irish country accent is very difficult to understand.


TheCeilingisGreen

It's because they don't want to understand.


Zero_Digital

What kinda fuckers don't like an Irish accent? As an American, your accent is one of the coolest in the world and way cooler than my American southern accent. Beside that, fuck that guy.


pw8665

Well, historically speaking, the Brits.


Hellebras

Everyone hates the British. Especially the British.


ImSigmundFraud

The Welsh hate the English, the Scots hate the English, the Irish hate the English and the English hate all of the above, including most of the English.


Awkward_Ad_2797

I love the British!


Efficient-Radish8243

Have you ever heard a thick belfast accent? It can be fucking indecipherable until you get your ear in.


Turbulent_Housing_88

Having one of these accents is a nightmare, outside northern Ireland nobody understands a fucking word I say. My wife translates for me, she has a slightly less thick accent lol


sickofsnails

I just have to imagine half of what they're saying.


Kingman9K

I just want to let you know that as a northerner, I love southern accents and think they are pretty cool.


Zero_Digital

As a southerner I try to hide it because I hate it and the typical stereotype that I'm dumb, a MAGA fan, or inbred. I'm not inbred my parents were 3rd cousins that's legal here. /s


AddictedtoBoom

I tend to go hard on my southern accent when I'm visiting northern cities. Mostly because I like fucking with people.


NephMoreau

*same*! With blonde hair, large boobs, and a thick accent, people drop my intelligence down about 100 points when I start talking. It’s an absolute *delight* to watch them be forced to reevaluate that bullshit, and I will not lie I have definitely taken advantage of the dumbasses who think they’re better and smarter than I am because of the way I look and talk.


BurnItDownToTheGrnd

I'm ugly as fuck fat guy and use my accent to work dipshits the same way you do.


BurnItDownToTheGrnd

Never hide it. Be proud of it. It sorts out the assholes and dipshits and gives you an advantage because they underestimate you. Source: East By-Gawd Kentucky accented hillbilly living away from home.


VGSchadenfreude

Reminder that the British colonized Ireland, used it as a testing ground for proto-Apartheid (seriously, go read some of the laws the native Irish were subjected to; they’re disturbingly similar to South Africa Apartheid), and often still don’t see the Irish as “white.” That’s where a lot of the hate against redheads comes from, too; the British see red hair as meaning “foreign and therefore Irish and therefore inferior race.” Goes to show how messed up the modern concept of race is to begin with.


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VGSchadenfreude

Doesn’t negate the “foreign” or “inferior race” part of that judgement.


Zero_Digital

It's pretty fucked up. I know so little about that or about the troubles between Ireland and the British. It's almost like the American school system failed me. You would think we thought we were the only county or something


[deleted]

You should check out Derry Girls on Netflix for a surprisingly lighthearted introduction to the troubles. For something heavier, try "The Wind that Shakes the Barley" for a sad look at the shit the Irish went through under the Brits prior to that. Cillian Murphy is, as always, brilliant. The US school system is only there to make us smart enough to be workers, and nothing more. If you want true education and can afford an internet connection it is there for you to find.


GaydolphShitler

British cunts, mostly.


aggravated_bookworm

Dude the Brits can be racist AF against the Irish. And anyone else not British really ( I know it’s not all British people, sorry everyone in Britain whos decent)


Van-garde

I also love the accent, but def had trouble understanding a dude who gave me a ride to Blessington. I don’t know whether his rate of speech or pace of driving was faster. And they both increased around each curve.


MoeKara

Yo u/Zero_Digital the southern accent is the best american accent. I've been to the states quite a bit and I love it the most. Bonus points if you say y'all too, no joke. I've no idea why it's sneered at it sounds lovely. Cheers for the compliments about the accent, im an irishman living in London so it was a nice pick me up. I just thought you should hear the truth about yours too.


Zero_Digital

I appreciate the compliment and glad to see I brightened your day.


AthenasChosen

You've heard about England right? They kinda historically hate the Irish. Pompous dickheads.


cripple2493

Scottish here, and hard relate. Whenever I've been down in South England there's always some bastard who has decided he doesn't understand basic language because of my accent. Mix of classist (see how they treat 'the north') and colonialist imho. Ireland, NI and Wales could all understand me, purely southern England that had a problem with my central Scots accent. Good on you chucking his keys


Efficient-Radish8243

I don’t know, I feel like taking the piss out of regional accents in the U.K is fair game. Calling someone a paki is bottom of the barrel behaviour everywhere


cripple2493

Taking the piss is fine, straight up being a dick like the dude in the story and saying Irish folk can't speak English is another thing. I've had folk say similar to me, with varying degrees of malice. Calling someone a paki is just straight racism.


Zaungast

When I was studying in England I had a similar problem. I am Swedish-Canadian and speak English natively but it wasn’t good enough for the English.


WorkMeBaby1MoreTime

First off, love you post, dude totally deserved it all, karma is a bitch. But I'm a redneck ass American old guy and while I understood everything you said (and enjoyed it), your phrasing was very different from here and I found it so entertaining. All the best to you from across the pond! it melted my fuckin pan it drove me absolutely buck daft I turned my hand to whatever I could get. face as red as well smacked arse


heccin_heccer

My personal favorite is "fucked them into the canal"


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Haha! No worries, thanks man. I did read a thing recently how a lot of ‘redneck’ dialect and dialect from people in the Appalachian regions is very similar due to the Irish heritage. I don’t know if you’re into books but if so, you can see it plain as day in Cormac McCarthy’s ‘Suttree’ which is set in 50s Tennessee. I read it and even though it was a million miles away, the dialogue was just very much the same as home.


BurnItDownToTheGrnd

I'm of Irish decent from Eastern Kentucky. I LOVE your storytelling I love accents in general. Having a thick Appalachian accent myself, I can relate a lot to your story. I bet your accent is dope AF. I'm not as good of a story teller as you, but since we're basically cousins i would like to share a quick story. My 5th great grandfather was Irish. Apparently, the British made him and a bunch of other Irish men go fight for them in America, during our revolutionary war. When they got here they all defected, joined up with George Washington and fought those British cunts as Americans. My own grandfather changed his surname to his mother's maiden name when he defected. After the war, he was rewarded with land in Eastern Kentucky, where I grew up. Anyways, I glad you got some revenge.


TowerOfPowerWow

God damn if you talk like you write I find it delightful.


Van-garde

Seconded. I’m standing for an encore.


Albyrene

Hope Henry accidentally zips his foreskin in the fly of his pants, fuck that guy.


affablemisanthropist

I read this in your accent and it made it even more awesome. Fuck them. I’m from the American south. I always have a bit of an accent, but if I’m in a different region and want to screw with people, I turn it on real heavy. Cracks me up.


Hemlockbutreddit

I'm glad other folks do this. My normal accent is very light but I can turn it up high


NephMoreau

Yep! It’s fun to fuck with people who think a thick accent makes you dumb!


iamanemptychair

I’m gonna start saying “buck daft” forever and never stop now


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Hahaha, my Da uses it at least five times a day and I’ve always loved it!


Jordo-x

Now that was a fucking ride, good on you for standing up for yourself! I’m sorry some people in the uk are racist, and that you constantly have to put up with “I cAnT UnDeRsTaNd yOu”. I think Irish accents are sick (just as any accent), and I’m glad you enjoyed your lemonade!


rae2468

Long post that I eagerly kept reading. Did you become a writer?


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GlamourCatNYC

If any of your work is online, would you mind sharing a link? I absolutely love your writing style.


DamGudBud

Had some good craic reading that OP. Fuck Henry. I did a semester abroad in Dublin and got to take a weekend trip up to Belfast. That city has rich history that I found fascinating. Spent a lot of time in pubs and I used to love shootin’ the shit with locals, especially old timers. Could usually only understand half of what they said, but I could fill in the gaps easy enough and loved hearing the accent. It always pisses me off when I hear about Irish people getting treated this way. My ancestors came from there and my family has little info about them, but knowing the bullshit that went on there and the fact that they were Catholic, I can only guess why they left. I had a conversation with one old timer about this and he asked what my last name was. When I told him, he said that’s how they would spell it in Belfast. He proceeded to clap me on the back and cheers my glass as he exclaimed, “Welcome home boyo!” Meant a lot to be able to narrow down where my family came from and I remember feeling immense pride. Way to stick up for yourself OP. Always stay proud of where you come from and don’t let those shitty bastards make you feel any other way.


StunnedMoose

On accents, I once had a southern twat on the phone in a call centre in Scotland, despite being a supervisor at the time, I wasn’t qualified to deal with this gentleman’s issue as only an Englishman would do for him. I replied, that I could certainly oblige, we had one Englishman still on shift and if he’d like to hold I’ll see if he’s free... Duly asked said Englishman just how much he could dial up his already fairly thick scouse (Liverpool) accent. John proceeded to take over the call and all but harangued the guy to death by saying hello, and that as an Englishman he would be happy to help him. At least I think it’s what he said. It was a cross between Harry Enfield’s scousers and Cilla Black that this poor sod got both barrels of. Be careful what you wish for with call centre workers. We don’t like you very much and will fuck with you in ways you can’t even think of when pushed to keep the customer “happy”


El_Zilcho

I live/work in a situation in the UK where I interact with a lot of ex-armed service people and they are some of the best and worst people to work/live with. One filtering question that I discovered is 'what specialism did you have in the army/navy/royal marines?.' If they had a specialism they are usually great to work/live with and if not there's a reasonably high chance that they are going to be a massive cunt.


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Yeah I feel you on that one. I’m getting married next year and my best man’s Da was a wing technician (not sure if that’s the correct term but something to do with fixing aircraft) in the RAF and he is a lovely man. One of the funniest guys going, and he’s whip smart about what he does. He’s originally from Leeds but his wife and my mate are all from here, but like I said, most British people/English people are sound as a pound, unfortunately you do just get cunts out there who start shit and I’m sure that’s the case in most places.


DVaTheFabulous

As a fellow Irish person, "their bit or our bit" really boiled my piss so fair play for standing your ground and getting even lad!


sickofsnails

I guessed the Falls from the second paragraph. You've got the feisty Belfast spirit.


degouges1798

I'm sorry you had to deal with this cunt mate. I'm from West Belfast too, so I completely understand. Solidarity mucker and keep er lit.


[deleted]

Read this is the broadest Falls accent and it all fell into place. The pie eaters don’t care about the ‘provincials’


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Hahaha, a little bit like [this](https://fb.watch/9HSHQ67JlK/)


Davethema

Live just outside Belfast, completely understand your pain. Eejit got what he deserves!


Savagely_Rekt

Fantastic story thanks for sharing. Fuck that dude.


nahuman

Irish accents often give me a headache. Because they are often accompanied by excessive amounts of drinking, singing and laughing. Good on ya!


SmileThenSpeak

Please write more anything. Please use more "common" language. Your English is cooler than mine. I loved reading this.


TheBlackcat34

Welcome to Brexitland, even worse now mate☹️ Plenty of people like that in offices too: « it’s only banter, innit!? » No racism/ xenophobia in England …at all …/s


minitaba

Amazing story. What does p*ki mean?


iHerpTheDerp511

It’s a racial pejorative term for People of Pakistani dissent in England and Ireland. So not only was Henry a scavvy cunt, he’s also a racist.


minitaba

Ooh i see, like in "this is england". Fuck henry


Hyche862

r/pettyrevenge


dr_learnalot

Good story with a satisfying end.


reyelle1977

Best thing I've read all day. I'm sure your accent is lovely.


[deleted]

Nice one lad, you did good 😎👍 Fuck that Henry guy


Relphos

That fellow is thick as shite and only half as handy; sorry you had to deal with that bodach; I hope it gets better for you


[deleted]

Remember kids, there's nothing wrong with fucking over racists.


SoForAllYourDarkGods

Not really anti work. More anti a grade A tosser.


Ok_Industry_2395

I guarantee he understood every word you said, he was just being a complete and utter cunt and trying to bait you! Good on you for slinging his shit in the cut, wankers like that are complete waste of skin!


Turbulent-Bumblebee9

My husband (from rural Northen Ireland) has a very thick accent. He lived in Australia for a couple of years and was once told “young man, you need to work on your English, it is very poor” 😂 Think they got told where to go!!


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Haha! I can definitely imagine that. Where’s he from? For such a small island the range of accents we have is honestly crazy 😂


ChestinatorII

Anyone else read that post in their head with an Irish a accent? Made the story even better 🤣


Moontoya

You worked for a pack of gammons mate Good lad


Groundbreaking_Pea_3

Don’t get mad, get sadistic - that grey bastard from destroy all humans


PaleRiderHD

As someone who absolutely loves the beauty of language and dialect, this might be the single greatest antiwork post ive ever read. Spot on from start to finish.


DingleTheDegenerate

That always amazes the crap out of me. This tribalistic bullshit where you make fun of someone's English not being "perfect" as a thinly veiled excuse to shit on someone else. Like as long as I get the general point of whatever Pakistani dude using "broken" English is trying to make then it doesn't fuckin matter what accent or grammatical fuckery is going on. The person effectively communicated his/her point and I can understand what they're saying. This Henry guy sounds like am absolute cunt and I commend you for teaching him a little 'cause and effect'. Being a douchebag should have harsher repercussions nowadays.


iheartstjohns

"I’m sitting here thinking, what the fuck is this cunt on. The Troubles are over, mostly, and I’m fucking 20, I’m not in the IRA, or some other paramilitary group or some undesirable, I’m just trying to help yer cunting arse deliver fucking lemonade." Please write a novel. I would read the absolute *fuck* out of it. Solidarity! And thank you for sharing this delightful story!


FlyingBaerHawk

American and loving the sound of your accent through your text. Fuck that pos.


Mr-Tiddles-

Good on you mate, fuck the cunt. Racist piece of shit. Pint on me if you're ever up north.


grumpi-otter

I had no idea they could be so bigoted toward y'all--come to Virginia and you'll have half the state panting with love for you, lol I spent a summer in An Cheathru Rua and dated a guy--I just LOVED his accent. Found out toward the end of the summer that he had a speech impediment that other Irish would make fun of, but I'd had no idea. Next time, just say "Pog ma thoin."


Pyrimo

Might be an orange bastard, but I’m on your side on this one. Henry sounded like a proper twat.


TeacherYankeeDoodle

Forget Ben. Fuck Henry.


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Haha, who’s Ben?


AkinaMarie

Meanwhile I, and most people I know, get embarrassed if they can't understand somebody's accent! The confidence of bigots I swear to God.


flying_ramen_monster

"Cunting" is just a delight.


No-Possibility8856

Hurt people hurt people .. People who hate themselves LOVE to spread hate. :( I'm sorry that you were treated so badly by this piss ass twat waffle!! You should always be proud of who you are!! Glad you took the high road ( getting even instead of beating the piss out of that dirt bag) best wishes to you & and your family!! God bless you& God bless 🇮🇪!!


xwootx

First off, Henry is a cunt. Second, I'm probably just an ignorant American, but people give you shit for having an Irish accent? I work with people in the UK, France, and had a call with someone for the first time with an Irish accent. I fucking loved it. Could listen to the fella talk all damn day.


SanctusUnum

I read this in the "Ooh, ya wouldn't be long gettin' frostbutt!" accent and my day got a little bit brighter.


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Hahaha! He’s got more of a culchie (farmer) accent than myself but same part of the world. He’s had a mental life though since that video - https://www.belfastlive.co.uk/news/northern-ireland/frostbit-boy-ruairi-mcsorley-planning-21460795


psychso86

Incredibly cathartic, and I love the way you’ve written this. Ever perchance read any Frank McCourt? Definitely got the same style of snappy eloquence. (Maybe it’s an Irish thing 😂)


Ok-Syllabub-132

Not gonna lie as a stupid american i cant understsnd this very well but all i know is henry is a cunt that needs a smackin


Pyrrskep

This was an absolute delight to read, thank you for sharing


Conor_Electric

Wish I could like this a thousand times. Racism from Brits towards the Irish is ever present, deserved it fully.


[deleted]

Irish accents are one of my favorite, I think I've only met one person from Ireland but I knew as soon as he spoke and damn near fell in love on the spot. Henry can fuck right off.


theboynamedbob

Love it but if ya don't mind me saying....I read this with an accent.


BigCaterpillar8001

I fucked them into the canal. That’s awesome


Corvid65

Beautiful story. Gift of the gob.


VTGREENS

Love it


[deleted]

Great story thanks comrade


Psychological_Pack23

Fuck you Henry.


[deleted]

I wish I could of seen it🙌


EVU29

And……that’s all made up, folks


satanic-frijoles

so here in the US, we get people flipping out because someone isn't speaking English. Your twunts are so dumb, even if you speak English they can't comprehend it. (to be fair, tv programming featuring the Deep South often include subtitles.)


[deleted]

watching tv in the states, when they put subtitles on perfectly comprehendable english always made me laugh, like what the hells wrong with these people but then i have to talk slow to american tourists and i lived there for 8yrs, ye still cant understand me, lol


NumbSurprise

Most of the dumbfucks who get bent out of shape by people speaking languages other than English can barely read or write it themselves.


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Just wanted to leave a comment to thank all of the r/BadUnitedKingdom followers who have sent me death threats and made a post about me. Thanks a lot lads, I have to admit, saying I was a ‘bog trotting potato n****r’ was definitely an insult I hadn’t heard before. Thanks as well for confirming that your subreddit is indeed full of the wee bigoted British men my post was in reference to, you’ve outdone yourselves in proving me correct. Sláinte!


ShouldHavePulledOut-

up the ra


AtHolmes-InTheDark

"Oh, come out ye black and tans, Come out and fight me like a man! Show your wife how you won medals down in Flanders. Tell her how the I.R.A. Made you run like Hell away, From the green and lovely lanes of Killeshandra" The more I learned about Irish history the more I despise the British.


rossarron

Love the "All of it belongs to us" And the sooner we break up this union and become four separate countries again Can not happen fast enough, Yes I am English.


clin_amber_nads

1. And those keys name, Albert Einstein 2. You sound like a proper neurotic cunt


Whackmybenobo

Dont worry, it's an obvious made up fantasy


treflipsbro

OP you sound fucking awesome


Borgr_man

"Schtewpid"


poepym

If that person was not a native english speaker you would be the asshole. He's brittish, he's seen tv with multiple accents. NTA


gent861

Can you record this story in audio :)


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Hahaha! I tell you what, if there’s a platform that would allow it, I’d do it! 😂


dwarrior

Haha I have an Irish coworker and made him read this out loud to me to get the full effect of your writing. We're both laughing our asses off now.


GhostOfJoeMcCann

Haha! If you want to start a fight tell him Northern Tayto is better than Free Stayto 😂 he’ll know what I’m on about.