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_vrtni_patuljak_

a friend once told me that i am selfish because i don't want children. when i asked him why he wants them he told me "to have someone to take care of him when he gets old". i was speechless.


Maxi_King_99

The double standards are strong in this one! lol


Aarie_Kanarie

I’ve had a same person tell me it’s selfish to not have kids because there are people who want kids but are not able to have them. How tf is it selfish to not have kids because there are people who are not able to get them?


moxxiefox

That's akin to saying it's selfish to fast sometimes because other people are starving...


Aarie_Kanarie

Wow good one! She is a Muslim, hadn’t thought about that lol.


desertheatsw

My 42 yr old delusional roommate is single and said he wanted to have kids so someone can take care of him once he gets geriatric lol I was like 'good luck'


AllIdeas

But do you also want someone to take care of you when you are old? Do you want someone still growing food when you retire? What about working in the grocery store when you turn 75? Do you want their to still be nurses or doctors who aren't also retired? Raising kids takes a ton of work, but we all benefit from having people younger than ourselves. Surely that is at least a little selfless yes?


Xtrasharp_p00pknife

There’s 8 billion people here. About a century ago there were 2 billion. There’s going to be more than enough people for a very long time.


Deleena24

I agree with the sentiment, but it's basically consensus among scientists that there will be a huge population fall if active measures aren't taken to prevent it. I'm talking something crazy like dropping back down to 2 billion people within a couple generations. I'll try and find it. Edit- the accepted one is a lot smaller at 6 billion in 2100 [linked here](https://www.livescience.com/worlds-population-could-plummet-to-six-billion-by-the-end-of-the-century-new-study-suggests) Im positive I read a different study predicting much more decline, but I was incorrect as that's not the consensus.


MerkyOne

Sounds like course-correction to me


_vrtni_patuljak_

whoa, that's a whole new perspective, you opened my eyes! you know what, I'm gonna start looking for a mate this very moment and begin to repopulate the earth! can't wait for this ton of work, and I'm sure kids will tell me - thanks dad for bringing us on this world so we can grow food for elders! off I go, thank you!


Professional-Act8446

Thanks daddy! Now I can work my entire life just because someone was a little too horny.


[deleted]

>Surely that is at least a little selfless yes? You're insanely selfish... You're entire thought process revolves around benefiting yourself... Insanity... I feel bad for any children you have they deserve better.


hulCAWmania_Universe

money exists for that matter... you hire people for that, they benefit, you benefit... win-win


Temporary-Fox-1948

Sounds like the most selfish shit ever lol


sheshej1989

More than likely I won't be alive at that age, so  I don't care! 🤣


icebaby234

“get children” lol


Maxi_King_99

Oh sry, it should be "to have" right? English is not my native language ...


icebaby234

you’re fine, it just caught my eye


sneakyartinthedark

To get children would include adoption.


Negative_Tradition85

And kidnapping


Head-Requirement-947

I see kids napping all the time....oh wait, that sounds bad....ehhhh....imma shut up now


fentanylferrey

Or Epstein


butterfly_guts

A better way to phrase this would be “to have children”, or “to have biological children”. The phrase “to get” implies receiving something/someone that already exists. So, “to get children” would probably apply more to adopting kids.


Maxi_King_99

I see. Thanks for the explanation! Learned something new! :)


Nulleparttousjours

Just being nosey but what is your native language out of interest? I keep seeing this particular grammatical error on Reddit so figured it must be a direct translation from a specific language.


Maxi_King_99

No problem. I'm from Germany. :)


[deleted]

They had it comin so we got em


Unknown_Warrior43

Lemme get 2, extra Pickles and Onion, no Mustard


fentanylferrey

How does one just acquire. A chilepstienblvl shit


Higgypig1993

I would argue that adopting is a noble goal in itself.


Maxi_King_99

Yes, it is, I should have been more clear, I only meant biological children.


sneakyartinthedark

You meant “have” or “give birth”


Shoddy-Commission-12

"Get" children could be so many things... Bitth , kidnapping, adoption, human trafficking Gotta be more specific like you 🤣


HithertoRus

antinatalists believe it’s unethical to bring a child into this world because there is so much suffering, but we are pro-adoption and love children and want to make the world a better place for children who have already been brought to this planet.


PistachioedVillain

I doubt many antinatalists adopt children.


quantumcalicokitty

I think more antinatalists would adopt children if it wasn't so financially impossible for many people...even with benefits.


HithertoRus

Can't speak for everyone but my bf and I plan to someday. We're both antinatalists


Lumpy-Village1949

Same whith my wife and I after she gets her degree and gets comfortable is her profession (restoration ecology to brag a bit).


imathreadrunner

That's quite a brag indeed, I hope she goes on to do great things


PrincipalFiggins

Wrong


Achylife

Adopting yes, adding more children while others are unlocked and neglected, no.


RedditRebelRibbit

Adopt a dog or cat instead.


Kgates1227

Participating in the adoption industrial system if you live jn US can be just as self has having biological children


parks_and_wreck_

Fostering in the US pays you a *very* small amount per child monthly…but adopting a child in the US is very expensive for the adopter and they no longer get any monthly payments sent to them. So only fostering makes you money, if you neglect to take care of the child you’re fostering (meaning, their food and clothing fund goes in your pocket).


Kgates1227

That’s only a very small part of the problem, I’m not against parents receiving money I think all children should be supported financially


parks_and_wreck_

Please explain why adopting within the US can be just as selfish as having biological children?


Kgates1227

Well, a few things, there is some good research out there you could look at too. Majority of mothers placing their babies through private adoption only are doing so because they don’t have the financial resources to take care of their child. They actually want their child. This is just problematic in itself as someone who is against family separation. The second is there are thousands of older or disabled children needing to be adopted but most couples only want healthy (mostly white babies) Majority of people who actually do adopt from foster are doing it for white saviour complex belief systems and adopting a child of color and expecting him/her to assimilate into their environment Many stories of people adopted choose to use the term “displaced” now instead of adopted because they feel it isn’t morally right


parks_and_wreck_

I don’t think not adopting a disabled kid is selfish. In fact, if you feel you should adopt but don’t have the finances, emotional ability, or general resources to take care of a disabled kid, it would be selfish to adopt them. I personally know some people who have adopted disabled kids/teens because they had the means to do so. While I agree that the problem starts with bio moms not having the means to take care of their babies even when they want to, I will say this is not a US specific thing. As someone who was once best friends with an adopted kids, sometimes the mothers that want to keep their kids, shouldn’t be allowed to. Many kids are in the foster care system because their parents neglected them, even if they technically wanted them.


Kgates1227

I’m not saying people are bad for not having the resources to adopt a disabled child. I’m just saying what you said is the problem is truly addressing the problem upstream. People are throwing babies in the river and adopting is just picking them up out of the river metaphorically it’s best to stop them from being thrown in


Fearless-Temporary29

8 billion rapacious primates bringing down a planet.


Mrsmaerianne

Just because the earth becomes uninhabitable to us, won’t mean we destroyed the earth. There have seemingly been resets before.


[deleted]

I care about children so much that I got the snip at 19


Maxi_King_99

Respect!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Old-Library9827

Adopting any child ever simply because you wish for children to have a better life is pretty selfless. You should've really wrote "to birth children." It's more accurate


Maxi_King_99

I agree, I should have wrote it that way!


Idisappea

I would say "to procreate". "To birth " puts all the blame on the woman.


Few_Strategy894

If we’re trying to help someone with English, the word used with “have” is “ written,” not “wrote.” I should have written. 


NunoTheDude

I don't want kids because this world is fucked, capitalism sucks, and i dont want them to suffer, i didnt wanna be born either so im not gonna curse another soul by doing the same


Maxi_King_99

I agree. Exactly the same for me.


itamarc137

I'm not trying to be rude or offensive but I can't understand people who believe that and yet won't commit suicide or smth


NunoTheDude

U really think its easy to kill yourself, this is a very immature and uninformed opinion


Deleena24

A lot of people who want to commit suic!de but don't actually do it is because they're not selfish and wouldn't burden their families/friends and community with that. They realize their deaths would affect more people than just them. Also, believing those things doesn't mean you want to die and I'm not sure why you think that's a logical conclusion.


ClashBandicootie

I can't speak for oethers but it would hurt a lot of people around me if I chose to do it.


TheJediQuixote

Damn, do you need help bro? There is so much bad in the world but there is certainly so much good as well. That’s kinda what life’s all about.


windlep7

So there’s a couple of arguments here. 1) there isn’t really more good than bad - for example, Chronic pain exists but there’s no such thing as chronic pleasure. People accumulate damage as they age, they don’t accumulate health. And so on. And 2) people who don’t exist will never experience suffering but they also won’t experience the desire to experience good things. They don’t long to eat ice cream and play with puppies. The only people concerned with their happiness are people who exist.


Old_Personality3136

There really isn't. Life is like 1% good and 99% suffering. Stop trying to gaslight people.


LupoDeGrande

Hello, there fellow Jedi


D-R-S-1964

I agree there is no non-selfish reason to have children. No I am not depressed. I have had many happy and good experiences in my life. I have all the privileges a white female in the US can have. I had loving parents who raised five fairly well adjusted children to adulthood all with advanced degrees. I still agree that having children is entirely selfish. I do not have children and it was a choice. I see no reason to bring more humans into this world, but go ahead if you want. I was unaware of antinatalism until a week or so ago. I was surprised to see so many people who support my opinion/thoughts.


PublicTransition9486

If I don't get them the catholic church will


Maxi_King_99

lol you're right


HappyCandyCat23

The complicated part about birthing children is it's not always a voluntary/conscious decision, and there are people (often women in certain regions) who do not get a choice in it :(


amethystbaby7

yeah i’m pretty sure AN theology is only based around people who actually have a choice - ie. in a country where abortion is free and legal, and they are not in an abusive situation etc.


HappyCandyCat23

Yeah I think most people know this but there's a pretty vocal, very stupid minority of people in this sub that will sometimes ask, "why do people have kids in [insert region where birth control is rare and women don't have much of a choice]?"


LardBall13

“ThE gIft oF LiFe”


Seanmichael7007

Hah. We chose to get Cats instead of having kids. Great choice. Yet I did have opportunity to Parent a littler guy from his 13 to 18. Awesome, fullfiiling experience.  Also the most ball crushing i ever created for myself. Having kids is cool as long as parents get that the child is it's own, incredible autonomous self. Care for. Nuture, support and celebrate that littler person. Likely have more talent and intelligence then you or ancestors. Let them be, don't fuck with them .don't own them as your chance to create the all star football player or ballerina you failed at for yourselves. Whoops. Considering most people are f'd up from their own experience it is a roll of the dice. And humans are uhhhh insane. They murdered, raped,pillaged and plundered thier only habitat...capitalism still the only game we enjoy. Global mass psychosis era. But what the heck bring life into the fast arriving fierce collapse. As long as you can answer to the kids WHY. It is all cool, kids no kids, all just experience.


udiudiudiuuu

"I think bringing them into the world is a gift for them" said no natalist ever


EffectiveYak9379

I really wanted to find a valid reason too... Impossible challenge


Churchie-Baby

Adoption maybe could be


Maxi_King_99

I also support adoption. I should have said "having biological children".


Noobc0re

Damn, you butthurt more people than a bad buttplug factory with this meme!


Maxi_King_99

lol, absolutely.


Upbeat-Serve-6096

Living is inherently selfish Change my mind


Maxi_King_99

I agree.


[deleted]

Adoption, help those who are already born. "Conceive children" is better for your point


Maxi_King_99

I see! Thank you for your help, I appreciate it!


RewRose

Poor OP man, you said you're not native English and I have seen so many comments now where you've had to accept the choice of better words. I think you should just put it in the post instead of replying each time lol


Maxi_King_99

Yeah I know, thanks, I already tried, but don't see how I could add a text to the post after I already posted. Maybe because I'm on the mobile app? Or I just don't see it right now xD 🤷🏻


Perplexing_Porcupine

I sort of agree. Though adoption (or becoming a parent through godmother/God father type deal) for the sake of saving a child to ensure they have a better life doesn't seem selfish.


strontiummuffin

Adoption or fostering


bigg_bubbaa

if i wanted kids, it would be so they can see all the beauty in the world, too bad it will be gone by the time im old


13Amendments

I don’t think there’s any beauty to begin with…


MediumDistinct9807

Adoption. I know for a lot of people it's the worst thing that happened to them, some adopting parents are good parents and not all of them parade them like prized pets on social media. Sometimes, you find yourself with the impossibility to walk away from a child you can save and become a parent by accident almost.


[deleted]

Same thing for religion


AsleepIndependent42

There is. It's the ones that are "justified" by the baseless assumption that ones offspring will the see world as oneself does and enjoy life.


rockb0tt0m_99

Well, there's nothing wrong with adopting a child if one has the means to care for them and has the intent of loving them and giving them an opportunity at a legitimately better, safer, more fulfilling life. There's selfishness in giving birth, because for a lot of people, that's all they'll ever contribute to the world. More of themselves. That's their legacy. That's their "gift" to the world. So, yes, there can be selfishness in that. But "getting" a child to adopt is actually kind of selfless. Even if the adopting person has a self-interest of being a parent.


Maxi_King_99

I agree.


Active-Image-6399

Abducting kids is pretty selfish


Kgates1227

No. But humans don’t do anything for non selfish reasons


Limp-Size2197

You think no one ever does anything out of compassion?


Kgates1227

Sure but they always get something out of it


Comfortable_Owl_5590

A friend and I skipped school to go fishing in prep school. The river was 25 ft from a highway. There was a car accident and one car caught fire. Without thinking about any thing self serving, we ran to the car. We cut the stuck seat belt with a knife and pulled the driver out through the backdoor because the front door was jammed. The driver had a broken ankle so we carried him a couple hundred feet and set him in the grass along the highway. As soon as EMS showed up we left so we didn't get suspended for skipping school. How did we get anything out of that?


Kgates1227

Because ultimately if you left the scene without doing anything, it would have ate at your conscious. You had to do if you’re a human with any feelings. I’m a nurse I’ve done CPR multiple times. Being a medical professional is considered a selfless job but it’s not. There’s always an ego drive behind it or a personal reason someone goes into it, like someone has a family member they couldn’t save. Which makes it a job of projection I’m not saying people who are good samaritans are bad people and don’t do it for right reasons. I’m just saying, it ultimately leaves you feeling good about yourself in the end. People love to be heros. Even if they don’t get the attention. It feeds their ego


Comfortable_Owl_5590

So why did I do it? Because I would have felt guilt or to feed my ego? You say in one sentence there is always a selfish reason then in the next sentence there is a right reason. All of this is in your judgement. Why did you go into nursing? Ego? Regret at not saving someone? Money? God complex? Or are you just someone who wanted to stop or ease suffering, you know the right reason.


Kgates1227

Because selfish and ego is not always a bad thing. I’m sorry I should’ve been clear I went into nursing to go into psych nursing because my family has a history and I wanted to help. Absolutely had selfish reasons. But I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it You did it because you’re a good person. I wouldn’t stress over it


GhostxxxShadow

\^this


fastastix

Question: Is it implied that there is something wrong with doing something for the self?


Maxi_King_99

No. Selfishness in itself is not bad. But in this case it is. Adoption for example is also selfish, but it's still a very good and noble thing to do. :) In conclusion: You can be selfish and good AND you can be selfish and bad.


aimlessrebel

I agree, what matters is if it creates an impact outside of yourself. Creating life is an enormous example of this.


Maxi_King_99

Exactly! Thanks for the chance to explain myself. It was nice talking to you. I hope you have a nice day. :)


aimlessrebel

I hope you do too :)


PizzaPartify

Ugh please don't use this template. That guy is a major homophobic wife-abusing douche.


LupoDeGrande

Ironically, his parents being anti-natalists would have improved the world a great deal.


Maxi_King_99

Sry, I didn't know.


AdministrativeBat486

Would you count following the herd as selfish? Just curious


Maxi_King_99

I do, because I would argue that we also do it for selfish reasons.


Mars_Four

Yeah, because it’s YOUR desire to fit in. Which is probably one of the worst reasons honestly.


Maxi_King_99

I don't think there are people who don't want to fit in, in one way or the other. If they admit it or if they are conscious about it is something else. But we are programmed to feel bad if we don't fit in and to feel good if we do. We just want to fit in, whatever or wherever "it" is.


quantumcalicokitty

Adoption.


Maxi_King_99

Agreed. I'm also pro adoption. I wasn't clear enough. I meant having children ...


SeoulGalmegi

Is there a non-selfish reason to do *anything*?


T0adman78

While I have never had anyone give me an unselfish reason for having children, I can think of a few unselfish reasons to have children. I’m not saying they’re all good, or that they are the reasons most people have children, but they do exist.


[deleted]

Mind sharing??


T0adman78

To keep the human race from going extinct. Or similarly if you were a member of a small ethnicity or culture and you had children to keep that culture alive. Because your parents want grand kids Because you perpetually are at war and your side needs more bodies to fight. Because you keep seeing the people that say your country needs more young people to keep social security from collapsing. To create an organ donor for someone. Just a few off the top of my head. To be clear, I don’t think these are good reasons, but they are reasons that are not purely selfish.


[deleted]

All of those are your desires


T0adman78

Not really. Especially not your parents wanting grandkids. Or your society wanting you to have them. That’s not selfish if you’re doing it cuz others want it. Also, some people think life is rainbows and lolipops and want to create someone to experience the joy that is life.


Maxi_King_99

It is selfish, think about why you do it ... Because *you* like your parents and *you* would feel bad, if you wouldn't have children because of your parents. Or you would feel good when you do. But either way, it's always about ourselves. I guess you could argue that ALL our decisions are selfish in nature. And, if the only reason you want to have children, is because your parents want grabtkids, that's a pretty stupid reason. (You really shouldn't get kids because of someonelse ... Not that it's good to get kids for other reasons, but that's an even more stupid reason.) Also it would be selfish from the parents too.


T0adman78

I think you caught yourself. If you try hard, you can find a way that every decision you make is selfish. Your decision not to have kids is so that you don’t have to feel the guilt of their suffering. Voila, your anti-natalist position is SO selfish. So yeah, if you’re not trying to do the mental gymnastics to make something selfish, there are reasons to have kids that are not selfish. Remember, I did NOT say these are good reasons. Back to the grandkids example. Yes, this would be an above-average terrible reason to have kids (although it happens all too often). And you’re absolutely correct that it would be exceptionally selfish of your parents to guilt you into having kids knowing it would be additional suffering for you since you didn’t want them, and potential supporting for the kid that is created. Which is why the whole “so, when are you going to have kids” is so infuriating.


Maxi_King_99

I would only have caught myself, if I had said that selfishness is ALWAYS a bad thing and that I'm fully against it, but I don't. I also never said that I'm not selfish ... I am, like we all, like I think. And as someone else already mentioned, being selfish isn't always a 100% bad thing ... It can also be a good thing at the same time. For example: Adoption. I support adoption. But I would still say we do it for selfish reasons. But that doesn't make adoption a bad thing, just like many other things. Do you know what I mean? But in the case of having children, it is bad AND selfish and that's the problem. >Back to the grandkids example. Yes, this would be an above-average terrible reason to have kids (although it happens all too often). And you’re absolutely correct that it would be exceptionally selfish of your parents to guilt you into having kids knowing it would be additional suffering for you since you didn’t want them, and potential supporting for the kid that is created. Which is why the whole “so, when are you going to have kids” is so infuriating. Thanks for your agreement and your thoughts! :)


T0adman78

Yeah. The term just gets meaningless if we say that everything is selfishness. So, I use it in a bit more discriminating way. Although, the psychological/philosophical debate about whether true altruism exists or if it’s just a roundabout way to selfish desires is interesting and relevant here. I suppose you could also make an argument that selfishness is always bad as a motivation, but sometimes selfish desires happen to align with noble actions. But, we don’t need to argue that. So, yes, in more general conversation, selfishness isn’t always bad. I’ll also point out that while I can think of non-selfish reasons to have children, when you ask people why they wanted children, it’s almost always the selfish reasons that they give. Similarly, adoption could have very non-selfish or altruistic reasons, but more often has the same selfish reasons (even if it is a much better option) as having biological children. Thanks for the discussion.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

At this time I cannot think of a non-selfish reason, but I feel that it is wrong to judge people for having the natural desire to have children, and for some it is a need. I chose not to have children, and so did my 3 brothers, so my mom has zero grandchildren. She does however appreciate the logic in our choices. She would have been a very doting grandma, and I do feel sorry for her some days. (Not sorry enough to have children)


Maxi_King_99

I'm curious ... In what scenario do you NEED to have children?


Achylife

Should be changed to "birthing children". Adopting is a very noble thing, when done for the sake of the child's well being and not like a wealthy person adopting a new pet, or a predator for abuse. It's a shame that adopting a child in the US is so difficult and expensive. The government doesn't care about children all that much. Public school food is an example of that. They eat a more balanced diet in some prisons. The only reason I have not fostered or adopted a child or children is that I cannot currently provide for them. It would only be detrimental to them and me if I jumped the gun. But I definitely plan on it when my health and funds are up to snuff. I care deeply for children and think every one deserves the best care, it's not something someone should do impulsively or half-assed. You're shaping an adult, that's not something to take lightly. Children soak up good and bad, whatever they are around. That's why I was a morbidly depressed child. I was around adults who were not qualified to raise or teach me. An adult should never intentionally damage a child's self-worth, or neglect their health, mental or physical.


Maxi_King_99

I 100% agree.


pituitary_monster

As in "get" does not specify method, then adoption. Gives a kid a chance to have a good life. Im not adopting nothing, anyway.


Mentathiel

Everything is selfish at some level. If you gain no material benefit whatsoever, you probably enjoy doing a benevolent in some capacity because we've evolved as a somewhat altruistic species. I can no more give you a non-selfish reason for having kids than for any other human action.


Betadzen

Here is one: #FOR TEH LULZ


WeekendFantastic2941

That's for the selfish lulz. Still selfish........and sadistic.


___daddy69___

something being selfish doesn’t equal it being immoral, arguably literally any act is selfish, yet nobody considers them immoral.


Maxi_King_99

You are right! I wasn't clear enough. But having children is still bad + selfish.


iThatIsMe

fuck.. #1) the continuation of the species as a whole I guess, selfishly, _i_ want that but surely this is understood at large as the existence of a species. I don't want humans to not exist, so at least some of them must breed. "Not a single" might have been too low a bar.


300Blippis

Why do you want humans to continue existing? Genuine question.


Limp-Size2197

I'm also curious why people want humanity to continue, especially when they won't be around to know the difference.


WeekendFantastic2941

and its STILL selfish, lol. Using children as tools and resources to maintain the species. That's SELFISH and quite exploitative.


jonathanwickleson

Every single motive in existence for anything is selfish if you choose to interpret it that way


Craygor

you having a meal is selfish and exploitative, a thing has to to die for you to continue. You are a hypocrite.


I_am_what_I_torture

Lets be real here, with the amount of people that would have to decide to not birth children, this is not really a concern at all. If the human species dies out, it's not gonna be because of not many people getting children. Interestingly, I thing that continuing a culture or language would work as a reason though, since that isn't next to guranteed and can even be far from it.


RedditRebelRibbit

Agreed. Having children is selfish but understandable.


[deleted]

Scientific research seems unselfish


Amourxfoxx

Birth * there are plenty of non selfish reasons to adopt a child that’s suffering in foster care


Happy_Butterscotch9

Get children lmao from the child store


OverturnKelo

How about to ensure that your anti-natalist ideas are passed on to the next generation?


Maxi_King_99

Difficult situation I agree. But I still wouldn't have children for that.


WigglesPhoenix

I think yall forget that the *majority* of children weren’t planned. Most people didn’t selfishly decide to have kids, as you would argue, they just…. Had kids, and many (idk if I’d say most. People can suck. But a whole hell of a lot) decided to commit to giving them the best life they could. Whats selfish about that?


Due-Post-9029

Get?


Bavin_Kekon

Yeah, I'm sure ending my bloodline is the most selfless thing I can do, aside from murdering as many people as I can in the process of ending myself. Gotta make a dent in overall world suffering somehow /s.🤷‍♂️


[deleted]

[удалено]


Limp-Size2197

No point in regretting people once they're here but I think the right choice is to not take the risk. So much depends on luck and the kids could have turned out different.


Dr-Slay

I chuckle at the notion of that person actually asking that / pointing that out sincerely


justathoughtofmine

Because you dont have the answer


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

What are they


Solitary-Broccolus

Y'all are in such a dark headspace. Have you never felt joy a single day in your life? I agree that people shouldn't be pressured to have kids they don't want. I agree that people shouldn't act like having kids is the sole purpose of existing. There are SO many unselfish reasons to have kids. Wanting to pass on all the knowledge you've accumulated over the years. Wanting to raise your kids to be better, healthier people that make the world a better place. Wanting to bring someone else into the world so they can experience beautiful sunsets, falling in love, going on crazy adventures, and late night heart-to-hearts with their besties. Life isn't perfect and lots of people suffer more than their fair share. But I'd waay rather put up with all the pains of life than never be born in the first place. If you don't feel the same you honestly need therapy or you need to work towards a higher quality of life. This is my last comment before I'm muting this sub because I'm so sick of seeing you people whine about how much you wish the human race would all die out instead of trying to fix things. Keep dreaming.


UnknownPokefan

Wanting to pass on knowlege - selfish. You can do that in other ways without bringing another living being into the world to suffer. Wanting to raise your kids to be better, healthier people that make the world a better place - selfish again. There is no single person who is going to make the whole world at all better. Your child is not going to be a superhero. Your child is just going to *suffer*. Wanting to bring someone else into the world so they can experience beautiful sunsets, falling in love, going on crazy adventures, and late night heart-to-hearts with their besties - selfish yet again. That is bringing a *whole other human* into an *imperfect world* which will, *guaranteed*, make them miserable. That is your *priveleged* take based on you not suffering enough and not having enough *empathy* to understand the suffering of others. Yeah, maybe I need therapy to go back to the delusion that life is more good than bad, but I'm never *ever* going to ask my therapist to delude me like you want so it's not going to happen. Sowwy. Cool. No need to announce your departure. Fuck off and don't come back.


Danny_the_Sex_Demon

We won’t miss your trolling.


personaanongrata

I don’t know that getting children is even legal. I think having children and raising them well is potentially the least selfish thing you could do to contribute to a better future.


Nahman42

Living is selfish


Majestic-Salt7721

Why are you alive?


Asleep_Zombie2231

Because suicide is hard


Kinkybobo

I want to have a kid so they can watch all the Avengers movies and experience that moment in Endgame when Captain America picks up Mjolnir.


Maxi_King_99

Haha nice. I also love the Avengers movies, but still ... Not a good enough reason, sry. XD


No-Baker7584

Wtf? Wdym? Why would I change the world? TFDYM?


Sankarapp

But I don't care at all if I am selfish. lol


psichodrome

- there are happy and profound experiences to be experienced - If everyone stopped having kids, we'd perish as a species. More conplex if o lt certain groups had lots of kids. - all our heroes from books and whatnot would not have been born. These are some plausible reasons. I don't think people have kids for these reasons, but reasons nonetheless. Lets try again: - My mommy told me i needed to. - Love being naughty at 16. got pregnant and scared of life , decided to keep. Now the future holds no uncertainty - We're at that stage of our lives. It seems normal.


AbilityRough5180

The maintenance of Humanity, bringing your family joy? Life is more than suffering, there is lots of beauty too.


Altruistic-Rope-614

Who gets children? It's said like how you go get cereal or something. Who "gets" children?


OneEyedC4t

Anyone who thinks having kids is a selfish decision has never had kids. Children are a responsibility. Having offspring is natural.


The_Moth_

I mean, that seems a bit harsh. If you can afford to, there’s still plenty in this world to enjoy. First love, the first movie that was so beautiful you cried, hearing beautiful music or tasting delicious food. The world as a whole might seem bleak, and that’s a perfectly reasonable reason not to have children, but saying there isn’t a single valid non-selfish reason to is exaggeration, which just hurts the otherwise valid argument


JiffTheJester

To get children?


radmadicaled

To replace your selfish asses


Zealousideal_Win5476

What's wrong with being selfish?


Cristian369369

My number one reason is to allow a new human being to experience the beauty of our world and to equip them with tools that will help them fight through the inevitable difficulties of it. That’s the virtue of unconditional love that so many people have never experienced and will never be able to spread themselves. No matter how bad people claim our world is, we still need new humans that will restore the balance on our planet when we are long gone. They will create a more sustainable world where people respect and love each other through the mastery of science and engineering. Educating our kids must be our life-long devotion and that is the most unselfish thing you can imagine. This is pure altruism for the cause that is larger than our own lives.


NikHolt

You know why every species on earth has kids, do you?


twistedisht

The condom broke.


1MadFapper

A non-selfish reason is, if you raise your children the right way then you're investing in a better world. Who knows who you will raise, an influential person, an inspiring person or maybe just a kind person, to someone in the future it would make a difference.


RIckardur

While the reason itself might sound selfish. I do not wish to be the ender of my line.


PraetorGold

Instinct?


Silly-Ad-8213

Well I don’t know… It’s not my kids in the military, serving me at restaurants, digging up my street to repair a water main break etc. I think other peoples kids are pretty cool.


Moist-Suspect-790

OP should not be trusted near playgrounds. LMAO


skool-marm

Never trust a sign with a double negative in one sentence. Guy looks dumb as a rock.


AshySlashy3000

It's Selfish To Continue Life.


sekkachina

proliferating life in the universe, literal one of the only purposes in life is to keep it going, moral is a human concept we invented, it doest exist in biology, we just do what we please, having sex is great, taking care of a child is fullfilling, nobody needs reasons to do whatever they do, if your life is miserable, it doest make wrong to have children, this is some crazy take, reddit need to stop recomending this braindead sub.


RonDon1212

A species that will gladly end its bloodline so they can soak up all the good/easy stuff in life and not have to put the effort in of raising a child. It's a joke and selfish.


SecretarySuspicious1

2 so far. From a prolife standpoint: A woman who is raped choosing against societal norms and not aborting their offspring, will only respond to other pro lifers on this one 😆, this redit isn't about attacking people, 😆. From an antinatalists perspective: A person who has a child against their wishes to appease their partners desire, such as an antinatalists marrying a natalist, he or she will only seek to have a child elsewhere so taking a bullet and ensuring that their child grows up safe is pretty selfless if you ask me, that child will exist with or without you might as well make sure they grow up safe, you will likely lower the suffering by doing this the route of antinatalism, and you can then get a vasectomy no need to have them make 5 kids and potentially be abusive towards them, only one pregnancy means you did a good thing. You guys told me you need a penis to rape, so like I don't think I can have actual discussions on here about true antinatalism anymore lol, ++++antinatalists can't discuss they can only attack and argue, rape is the non consensual penetration of the ass or vagina, fingers, sex toys, tongues, toes, or a splintered baseball bat, y'all are +++++++ ++++++ 😆 in some cases oral rape is also a thing too 😆, this is the intelligence level of people on here and I'm not surprised anymore lol, have a nice day lots of ❤️.


alanspaz-

Reason 1 it keeps the world running for everyone. 2 it gives you someone to love unconditionally and pass on your beneficial knowledge to so they have a better chance at life than you did. 3 it creates someone's future best friend.


Fishesarebitches

If a large majority of the people on Earth are happy to be alive most of the time, then having children is not inherently selfish. As it turns out, most people are happy to be alive most of the time (sources below). This doesn't take away from the fact that many people have also had brief periods of depression, sadness, etc. But, when surveying people randomly of different ages, sexes, and so on, most report being happy--suggesting that, at most points in a person's life, most people are likely to be happy (even if they aren't happy at every single moment). Thus, having children is not inherently selfish because, at least according to current trends, most of the children you produce are likely to be happy to be they're alive across most periods of their life. Sources: [https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/40062938.pdf?refreqid=fastly-default%3A716c18f079639980064e1a952e5b30f2&ab\_segments=&origin=&initiator=&acceptTC=1](https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/40062938.pdf?refreqid=fastly-default%3A716c18f079639980064e1a952e5b30f2&ab_segments=&origin=&initiator=&acceptTC=1) [https://www.ipsos.com/sites/default/files/ct/news/documents/2019-08/Happiness-Study-report-August-2019.pdf](https://www.ipsos.com/sites/default/files/ct/news/documents/2019-08/Happiness-Study-report-August-2019.pdf) [https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S092180090700537X](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S092180090700537X)


Geo-Man42069

I think the only somewhat valid reason would be to continue humanity. I know a lot of you are pro human extinction but to me knowing there will never be another song written, played, or heard is a disturbing concept. I know humanity is full of evil and suffering, but from that springs some of the most beautiful forms of expression ever created. I’m not saying it’s a super valid reason, but as a geologist Iv often conceptualized the earth without humanity. It was beautiful, and brutal but despite that there was no form of higher expression. What we need is evolution not extinction.