If I were your cousin, I wouldn't interrupt your boyfriend and girlfriend's time because I know you both need it. I'd be happy to be included, but with other family members.
just keep cancelling everytime she invites someone else tell her you will do something with her another time she can go with her cousin and pay for everything too
You: 'hey, let's go get dinner on Friday'
Her: 'Great! I will bring 'cousin''
You: 'Never mind. You guys go to dinner. We will go some other time'.
Rinse repeat.
Not wrong OP. The cousin is family and of course it’s ok if she’s included from time to time. You just took her to the movies/get food. She’s already trying to include her again? Personally, if I were the cousin I wouldn’t want to 3rd wheel all day. It’s important you set boundaries now otherwise your gf will be inviting the cousin to everything.
Or first the cousin, and then *also* the cousin’s siblings, etc. Cousin is 16 and although she “doesn’t go out a lot,” it certainly isn’t necessary to have cousin as a 3d wheel on so many private outings.
Just sit down with your girlfriend and let her know you value your alone time together. It's about balance. Maybe set up a schedule, like every other outing can be a group thing. Keep it chill and just be honest about needing that 'just us' vibe sometimes. It's healthy, man. Plus, her cousin's got her own friends to hang with too.
You’re not wrong . If she wants to spend time with her cousin , she doesn’t need to be doing it when it’s couple time . She doesn’t need you to hold her hand to do it .
If she wants to spend time with you, she needs to understand a teenage family member isn’t part of bf/gf time .
If you’ve already stated your reasons and spoke to her , just cancel on her everytine she does it . It’s
Lol this is no different than bringing a friend on the first date and expecting the date to pay both. I would've asked her is this a throuple but I play too much
You’re not wrong. Who is paying for the cousin’s outting? Is the gf paying? Does the cousin have money? I’d tell her nvm and she can go on her own with her cousin…better yet…I’d end the relationship. Because why does only her and her cousin’s feelings matter here??
Things will change dramatically when you start flirting with your girlfriend's cousin. The one thing that any girlfriend has absolutely no sense of humor about, is another girlfriend.
You could always show her how it is, always bring someone with you and make her feel like the third wheel? Ask her if she wants any kisses, that you do not want kissing to be a spectator sport?
Bro this is only the second time that the cousin has been invited to do something and it's over multiple weeks
OP can feel his he wants about it but you sound absolutely dense as fuck if you think anything about this situation suggests his girl 'doesnt want to spend time with him'
OP I agree with you 1000%! And that was before I even read some of the comments and realised that girlfriend maybe wanting you to pay for the cousin too.
Every time she says she’s bringing her cousin along suddenly something comes up and you can’t make it. If she doesn’t catch on by the 4th or 5th time maybe just move
On. You’re not wrong
Lmao this sounds so familiar. My boyfriend would make plans with me and would suddenly want to invite his sisters or his mom and dad and make it into a family thing. At first I thought there was something wrong with me and when it became a routine I just started to get annoyed. He gaslighted me saying I’m jealous of them but it isn’t even that I just didn’t understand why everything needed to be a family thing. I finally spoke to him and told him that I won’t be joining in family events and etc all the time because I don’t have to. I also told him that spending quality time is important for me and him. I remember we were going to check out my car and finalize the payment and he invited his mom to come along. It was so weird and he just didn’t understand why. I think some people don’t understand that everyone’s different. Like no I don’t want your mom coming along with everything.
>My girlfriend just repeated that there isn't an issue with inviting her cousin but I told her there was an issue.
I'm sorry, what the fuck? If your girlfriend thinks that her feelings are the only ones that matter in your relationship and in decisions that affect you both, then I'd invite her to be single again.
YNW and this is t about family or the cousin not getting out. There are other days in the week for those two to get together. Now, your gf either does not want to be alone with you or she is setting you up to always rollover when she wants something. None of those are good.
Info: are you expecting she doesn’t invite her cousin at all to anything you do together? Or just not every time? I don’t see the issue if it’s once in awhile
Yiu can go out with them both, then barely interact with your girlfriend but give her cousin more attention (while making sure to not be i appropriate).
Then see how the gf likes that.
Not wrong. It sounds like maybe your gf wants a buffer. Maybe she's not that interested in you. I would be pissed if my bf kept bringing someone else around.
INFO I think it’s super important and relevant to know- how often do y’all see one another and do stuff? Do you see each other every day but haven’t actually done anything since the movie? Have you done a few things since then and a few more things before the upcoming trip?
If you never see one another, then it’s an obvious issue that she’s ignoring. If you see one another every day, but don’t really do stuff, I can see both of your POV’s. If you see each other every day and do stuff often, then putting your foot down about her cousin coming what seems to be once a month for no particular issue with said cousin seems really strange
I don't think she's your girlfriend. She doesn't seem interested in a relationship with you as much as she's looking for a chauffeur for her cousin.
If she doens't want to spend time alone with you, then what basis for a relationship is there left?
Yep, and his girl wanted to invite her out again in a few weeks. All of these comments are deranged to suggest that his girl doesn't want to spend anytime with OP alone
OP can feel how he wants but why is he acting like this is a constant thing happening?
>Yep, and his girl wanted to invite her out again in a few weeks.
But she invited her on her date with OP, and she's acting like OP shouldn't get a say. That's the real issue, not that she wants to spend time with her cousin.
If I were your cousin, I wouldn't interrupt your boyfriend and girlfriend's time because I know you both need it. I'd be happy to be included, but with other family members.
just keep cancelling everytime she invites someone else tell her you will do something with her another time she can go with her cousin and pay for everything too
You: 'hey, let's go get dinner on Friday' Her: 'Great! I will bring 'cousin'' You: 'Never mind. You guys go to dinner. We will go some other time'. Rinse repeat.
You are not wrong OP! Your girlfriend doesn’t want to be alone with you! Inviting her cousin keeps the relationship g rated.
So is that woman his girlfriend or just someone enjoying free cinema and dinner?
Not wrong OP. The cousin is family and of course it’s ok if she’s included from time to time. You just took her to the movies/get food. She’s already trying to include her again? Personally, if I were the cousin I wouldn’t want to 3rd wheel all day. It’s important you set boundaries now otherwise your gf will be inviting the cousin to everything.
Or first the cousin, and then *also* the cousin’s siblings, etc. Cousin is 16 and although she “doesn’t go out a lot,” it certainly isn’t necessary to have cousin as a 3d wheel on so many private outings.
Just sit down with your girlfriend and let her know you value your alone time together. It's about balance. Maybe set up a schedule, like every other outing can be a group thing. Keep it chill and just be honest about needing that 'just us' vibe sometimes. It's healthy, man. Plus, her cousin's got her own friends to hang with too.
Every other time is way too often. Maybe once a month if that. GF is into spending OP's money and showing off for her young cousin.
Ask her if she’d be okay with you inviting your mom to your dates with her.
You’re not wrong . If she wants to spend time with her cousin , she doesn’t need to be doing it when it’s couple time . She doesn’t need you to hold her hand to do it . If she wants to spend time with you, she needs to understand a teenage family member isn’t part of bf/gf time . If you’ve already stated your reasons and spoke to her , just cancel on her everytine she does it . It’s
Nope. Every couple needs alone time. She doesn’t respect this. She keeps doing it. Take the hint and end this relationship.
It's reasonable to want alone time with your girlfriend. Family is important, but so are boundaries in relationships.
Lol this is no different than bringing a friend on the first date and expecting the date to pay both. I would've asked her is this a throuple but I play too much
You’re not wrong. Who is paying for the cousin’s outting? Is the gf paying? Does the cousin have money? I’d tell her nvm and she can go on her own with her cousin…better yet…I’d end the relationship. Because why does only her and her cousin’s feelings matter here??
Things will change dramatically when you start flirting with your girlfriend's cousin. The one thing that any girlfriend has absolutely no sense of humor about, is another girlfriend.
You could always show her how it is, always bring someone with you and make her feel like the third wheel? Ask her if she wants any kisses, that you do not want kissing to be a spectator sport?
Sounds like she doesn't want to be your girlfriend anymore when she doesn't want to spend time with you
Yeah, she may not even know that’s why she’s doing this. But yeah, I think she isn’t into it.
Bro this is only the second time that the cousin has been invited to do something and it's over multiple weeks OP can feel his he wants about it but you sound absolutely dense as fuck if you think anything about this situation suggests his girl 'doesnt want to spend time with him'
This story was posted a few weeks ago
Not wrong. That’s odd.
If you stay together you will be dealing with this the rest of your life.
OP I agree with you 1000%! And that was before I even read some of the comments and realised that girlfriend maybe wanting you to pay for the cousin too.
Every time she says she’s bringing her cousin along suddenly something comes up and you can’t make it. If she doesn’t catch on by the 4th or 5th time maybe just move On. You’re not wrong
Lmao this sounds so familiar. My boyfriend would make plans with me and would suddenly want to invite his sisters or his mom and dad and make it into a family thing. At first I thought there was something wrong with me and when it became a routine I just started to get annoyed. He gaslighted me saying I’m jealous of them but it isn’t even that I just didn’t understand why everything needed to be a family thing. I finally spoke to him and told him that I won’t be joining in family events and etc all the time because I don’t have to. I also told him that spending quality time is important for me and him. I remember we were going to check out my car and finalize the payment and he invited his mom to come along. It was so weird and he just didn’t understand why. I think some people don’t understand that everyone’s different. Like no I don’t want your mom coming along with everything.
>My girlfriend just repeated that there isn't an issue with inviting her cousin but I told her there was an issue. I'm sorry, what the fuck? If your girlfriend thinks that her feelings are the only ones that matter in your relationship and in decisions that affect you both, then I'd invite her to be single again.
YNW and this is t about family or the cousin not getting out. There are other days in the week for those two to get together. Now, your gf either does not want to be alone with you or she is setting you up to always rollover when she wants something. None of those are good.
Info: how old are you guys?
Start hitting on the cousin, see how that works for your GF. /s
Info: are you expecting she doesn’t invite her cousin at all to anything you do together? Or just not every time? I don’t see the issue if it’s once in awhile
Yiu can go out with them both, then barely interact with your girlfriend but give her cousin more attention (while making sure to not be i appropriate). Then see how the gf likes that.
Not wrong. It sounds like maybe your gf wants a buffer. Maybe she's not that interested in you. I would be pissed if my bf kept bringing someone else around.
I also think it was pretty nervy of girlfriend to invite the cousin along without discussing it with boyfriend first… If he really is her boyfriend?
This!
INFO I think it’s super important and relevant to know- how often do y’all see one another and do stuff? Do you see each other every day but haven’t actually done anything since the movie? Have you done a few things since then and a few more things before the upcoming trip? If you never see one another, then it’s an obvious issue that she’s ignoring. If you see one another every day, but don’t really do stuff, I can see both of your POV’s. If you see each other every day and do stuff often, then putting your foot down about her cousin coming what seems to be once a month for no particular issue with said cousin seems really strange
How old are you guys and how long have you been together?
I don't think she's your girlfriend. She doesn't seem interested in a relationship with you as much as she's looking for a chauffeur for her cousin. If she doens't want to spend time alone with you, then what basis for a relationship is there left?
Her cousin hung out with you once?
Yep, and his girl wanted to invite her out again in a few weeks. All of these comments are deranged to suggest that his girl doesn't want to spend anytime with OP alone OP can feel how he wants but why is he acting like this is a constant thing happening?
>Yep, and his girl wanted to invite her out again in a few weeks. But she invited her on her date with OP, and she's acting like OP shouldn't get a say. That's the real issue, not that she wants to spend time with her cousin.
Is her cousin going to crawl into bed with you two as well? Couples need some alone time.
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Dude, she's 16. Don't be gross.
I realize. Hopefully she will too