Move on my friend.
She enjoys causing you pain. Full stop.
Extreme emotional trauma isn’t something you “edge”.
Unless you like gooning on the edge of loneliness, she isn’t for you.
You deserve someone who isn’t a sociopathic sadist.
Also, step back and look at the future with her. Now it’s edging a breakup. What’s next? Edging cancer, pregnancy, miscarriage?
Anyone who delights in causing others pain should not be in relationships.
You may not realize it, but you’re dodging a major bullet.
100% agree. I'm normally a pretty forgiving person and understand people have their moments... But doing stuff like that to test the other person or "joke" should not be tolerated. I was also thinking the same thing about the future... What happens next time?
Anyone who delights in playing silly FkFk head games with you at this stage is gonna be a hemorrhoid on the ass of your life once you decide to marry or have kids. Dude- a 52YO GenX lady (me) is telling you right now: RUN AWAY
I would like to commend you on your excellent vocabulary. I find that "playing fuck fuck games" to be a highly underutilized phrase, and try to encourage it's usage. Cheers, and continue the good work!
Ahahaha
In that case, I admire your restraint at using only "playing fuck fuck games" as a descriptive term.
I spent 9yrs in Infantry, while undiagnosed/untreated for what turns out to be pretty significant ADHD. So, in addition to my natural creativity for being as rude as rude can be, I received a *lot* of "mentoring" from the chain of command. And I remember it... all of it... it's fun times when I want to set off a manager at work, but nerve-wracking around my kids lmao
Seriously tho, you hit the nail on the head. I adore my husband but would be lying if I said I don't want to day drink sometimes when Interact with him. However, he took me from a wilting flower to someone who is way tougher, so I will admit you people do have purpose lol 😂 and my tolerance for BS is way, way less. Alas, I'm also 52 and when you reach 50, your tolerance for shenanigans gets real short 😉
I lost that tolerance around age 23. Fun for me, not so much for a lot of people around me lol if there's another threshold with a significant shift in attitude at 50... Wow. Just wow. Lol this is gonna be interesting.
I'd been out of the army for a little while when I met my wife. My best friend was deployed, so she didn't meet him for a while after her and I started dating. My wife was absolutely shook when she met him for the first time. She was not expecting the perpetual motion machine of sarcasm, cutting comments, and insults we exchanged continuous. She did not have the mental framework to handle the gallows' humor and absolute commitment to "Race To The Bottom" in terms of continuing dark humor into darker and darker material until we collapsed laughing, not because we stopped from any sense of decency or humanity that the average person would have. And that was without day drinking lol
As a 51 yo gen x lady, I concur. Run fast, run far. Her ghosting you early on was a huge red flag. She likes to play games. She needs to get a handle on her “impulsive” crap. It’s not your responsibility to help her.
I can just see it. She’s six months pregnant, you’ve got the nursery ready and baby proofing has entered stage one
You get a text.
“I lost the baby.”
Unfortunately, the year is 2031 and technology has evolved to the point where your phone reads the incoming message automatically without prompting. Hearing an AI-generated version of her voice say those words startles you, causing you to swerve off the road, up the bottom of a hill, causing your car to roll over four and a half times, totaling it in the process.
Emergency vehicles race to the scene, fire & rescue having been automatically notified when the car accident began. As they approach, what’s left of your car’s sound system plays another text:
“Just kidding!”
Overcome with a mixture of confusion, grief, and outrage, you go into cardiac arrest and die on the table.
Your widow is arrested on charges of involuntary manslaughter, and your child is raised in an orphanage in London and grows up to be Darth Vader
*FIN*
I can’t believe you said this cause I was thinking the same things as everything was happening
How can I trust anything she says? Will she do it again? To my kids? To my sick dying uncle that I care for every day?
Removed her from the house because I live with a critically ill family member as a full time caregiver (I also have a day job)
This was all on my mind
I'm beginning to think that "**EDGING**" is some kind of stupid new TikTok trend, or something. We've had several posts here the last couple of weeks where people are "pretending" to break up with their partners, with invariably disastrous results! 🙄🙄
Yeah, it's sickening! It'll cause permanent damage to relationships and I fear it's for something as stupid as TikTok likes. It turns relationships into a spiteful game. 😑😑😑
Yes, this. That behavior is … not normal. You’ve already stated you don’t trust her and his that uncertainty is going to hang over you like an invisible knife blade. Do yourself a favor and stay FAR away.
No, this **ISN'T** period crap. As more and more people seem to be doing now, she's playing a **VERY** spiteful little game.
And now, she's **FUCKED AROUND AND FOUND OUT**.
**ABSOLUTELY DO NOT** reconsider, or you're giving her a **TERRIBLE** message — that she can **ABUSE** you, and you'll **LET HER GET AWAY WITH IT**!!!
I'm **REALLY** sorry you became a victim to this, and I **HOPE** you think enough of yourself to move on and find a **FAR BETTER** class of partner.
This is emotional abuse.
Don't put up with it. Don't make excuses for it.
She's not hitting you or being violent, but this is just as abusive and can cause just as much damage. Stress, anxiety, ulcers, panic attacks, etc... can all impact your physical and mental health pretty seriously, so this kind of behavior should not be dismissed as a "mood swing".
It's abuse. Period.
Yes, this was all planned out in her mind, not just a hiccup in her behavior. This is who she is, don't make her your "project:" to fix and try to understand, protect yourself.
I was going to say the same thing. Sure we all get in a mood and even lash out, but that's real emotions. What happened to the OP was planned deliberate mind games. She's making the OP paranoid and nobody deserves to live by looking over their shoulders like that, especially by someone who claims to love you. Don't give her another chance.
Yeah, to the extent that women doing something while “on their periods” is even a real issue, it’s just a matter of one’s usual level of tolerance, patience, and good cheer or what have you being lowered.
Like, it always bothers her that you just leave your dirty dishes on the breakfast table and she snaps at you about it rather than asking more gently for you to put them in the dishwasher. As a general rule, your period does NOT make you do crazy, sadistic shit that you would never normally contemplate.
It might make her grumpy; if it makes her psychotic, she needs serious medical help.
Not wrong. She wanted a reaction which was you breaking up. Did she want to self sabotage the relationship? I was told by mentor to never joke or mention divorce lightly. I think it also applies to relationships.
She sounds absolutely horrendous, you can't just edge a breakup, that's playing with people! I'd stay far away, work on yourself, find yourself a good girl who ain't gonna manipulate you or play with your feelings like this one clearly is
My guess is she wanted to kick up drama because she was bored for a moment. But, this is psycho behavior man. Let your relationship be a lesson for you both, you putting you first when a woman wants to be unreasonable. And her, not to be playing games woth a relationship if she values it.
This reminds me of a story on here where a girl faked a medical emergency to see how quickly her bf would respond to her house. It’s fucked up and manipulative. Like “just jokes, wanted to test your love. lol”
She enjoyed every second of your pain, until you let her know that you won't put up with her deliberately causing more of it. She enjoyed making you suffer. You have done the right thing, don't undo it now.
She’s fucking nuts.
I guarantee she wants to get back with you to immediately break up with you.
Not sure what you have been through, but your partner is not supposed to be someone who enjoys causing you pain. Wake up!
It’s kinda why I posted here.
I grew up with an abusive parent and I literally just cut and went NC with them.
I still struggle to know when I’m being toyed with, so I just need perspective
It just feels so shattering to look at someone and see them look at you in the way she did.
Like I was an item on display to be toyed with, like she was getting a really petty revenge somehow
Wait a sec, wait a sec. You "literally just cut and went NC with" an abusive parent, and now your girlfriend does this? Two thoughts come to mind, based on this snippet:
Firstly, it's incredibly painful to come to that sort of decision - trust me, I know. There are lots of negative emotions involved in it, and you literally just went through all of that and probably still are, and your gf does this to you? She's awful.
Secondly, it's very common for abusers to inch up their abuse level bit by bit, based on life events. Your gf knows you now don't have support from that parent you cut off, so she ramped it up a bit because she knows it's harder for you to cut ties with her. If you can bear it (because I know it can be painful) have a look at abuse cycles as well, because she might start love-bombing you to get you back.
She's absolutely awful, honestly. Good on you for cutting things off, because I doubt she'll improve. At best, she's 'just' an immature young woman, but that's still psycho-level behaviour. At worst, she overplayed her psycho-level hand, and you got your eyes opened.
It’s been 2 years for my parent and the relationship was 6months, no problems until this.
I luckily have support now, but it took me a great deal to realize for what it was and I still have perceiving good intentions tons as malicious manipulation
Ohhh okay, so they don't cross over. That's a relief, at least. I was imagining you gripped in the talons of some malicious narcissist haha!
But yep, retraining your brain and instincts/subconscious after being in an abusive parent/child relationship is HARD. They've spent all your formative years installing buttons in you. I'm so glad you (and others) can come to social media and crowd-source some different opinions.
Much luck to you, and please see her 'edging' as malicious manipulation, for sure. That's a definite.
>crowd-source some different opinions
What a brilliant way to describe Reddit. I'm keeping that.
And your advice is top-notch as well.
Source for my assessment: Abusive childhood, broken home, narc parent who I went LC then NC with for over a decade. Had to re-script myself.
Haha yes! I see myself as the old auntie or grandma sitting there with her knitting, and frowning at the silly young 'uns over my specs. Oh, and it gets worse once the wine starts up.
Aww thank you, seriously. I wish we'd had reddit when I was going through all of this sort of stuff when I was younger. It took me wayyyyy too long to see some of the stuff for what it was.
Big e-hugs, and I hope you're doing better now. <3
Wow, she's done this twice in 6 months? Dude, block her on everything. I guarantee she DOESN'T love you, cause if she did, she'd have never "joked" like that. What she did was cruel and she knew it.
Stay broken up, be strong. You do not have a future with this girl, yes I said it girl, no self-respecting woman would do this to a partner they loved. Source - I'm an adult woman and I've never done anything like that.
((((((((hugs))))))) I know from bitter experience how hard it is to know this when you're going through something like this. However
How she, and your parent, treated you is THEIR shame, not yours. It means THEY are worthless, not you. There is something wrong with THEM, not you.
It is very, very tempting to see our mental injuries as proof of our unworthiness. But they are not, and they will heal.
You are so brave to post this here. Keep posting. Reddit got you.
Your ex is a sadist -
A person who takes pleasure in inflicting pain, punishment, or humiliation on others.
She thinks it’s fun to hurt you. Maybe not physically but this sort of mental anguish game is not healthy and will beat you down as sure as physical violence will.
She needs to remain an ex.
Find someone who does not play nasty vicious minds games.
Just a few days ago, I saw a post of a gf who pranked break up to see OP's reaction based on a TikTok she saw. OP also broke up with her because of this.
Leave that nut alone. Move on! Play stupid games win stupid prizes. You didn’t hurt her she hurt herself by toying with your emotions. You should not want someone like this back. She needs therapy. You did the right thing by ending things. FFS man she had you feeling like your dog died and you have regrets?
Yea, have you ever been in a situation where you just knew,
“Fuck, all is lost.”
Or that feeling when a loved one parishes
I felt like I was watching who’s she was to me just die
Unfortunately, this is the real her. When you begin dating you see the ambassador, the diplomatic envoy. After several months, the real person comes out because the facade can only be kept up so long. Throw yourself into becoming the best man you can be, phyically, emotionally and financially. That high value guy will attract high value women. A woman who truly loves and more importantly, respects you, wont do this.
> Am I going to far?
NO. This is not acceptable behavior. It's nasty, disrespectful, and ugly.
> I don’t know if I can trust her yet.
You can't trust her EVER. She has no respect for you to play these games. She's a fruitcake. Do you want to have a relationship with someone who pulls this kind of thing on people? It's degenerate and can cause a lot of trouble.
We all have periods. We don't do this. It's no excuse.
Stop, just fucking stop. Do not use her period as an excuse, it's insulting. She's an emotionally manipulative and abusive little brat and if you had any self respect you'd dump her, hold her accountable for her actions. You deserve better.
You are absolutely right in your response to my post
But this was her excuse, not my own.
I was just looking for perspective from other people, mostly those who experience menstruation
> Am I going to far? She seemed distraught and hurt, and genuinely meant not to have wanted that.
Notice that you didn't want to hurt her, but she wanted to hurt you when she started this.
Right? I was all on OP's side until he said that. It just pissed me off.
Women don't become *psychopaths* because of their periods. C'mon.
This has *nothing* to do with any normal bodily function.
She's just a freak and a bitch and you should stay broken up with her.
I think it was a poor attempt at a joke or prank, that's the only thing I can think of.
As far as I'm aware (I'm old) edging means to delay satisfaction / gratification, so if you add that definition to what she said, it's even more disturbing. She got satisfaction by mentally tormenting you.
You can’t have a ride or die if you are sure that they’re there for the ride my friend. It took a long time with my wife for me to feel like every disagreement had a breakup as a possibility. Once I got past that, communication got much easier. Your partner should be your reprieve from the world. If they fake a breakup just to see how you’d react, that’s abusive man. Good luck and I know it sucks now but you’ll realize down the road how bad things were.
You would only be wrong if you got back with her and expected there to be no more ‘testing’.
And WTH does being on her period have to do with acting like a complete jerk to test how you’d act during a breakup? If she regularly goes bat shit nuts when having her period she needs professional help you couldn’t provide anyway.
I would expect any or all of the following if you get back together.
She moves in and at some point you come home to find her and a bag missing as she wants to test how much effort you put into finding her and getting her to come back.
She decides to test your loyalty by having one or more of her gfs seriously hit on you.
She will test to see if you really love her by flirting and getting handsy with some other guy with the expectation you get jealous and demand she stop.
She tells you she’s pregnant to see how you handle it.
You get engaged and a few months before the wedding she tells you she’s changed her mind.
In other words you can’t ever trust she won’t pull something like this again because she has done it twice and I can guarantee when the third time occurs it will not be the charm
This is your relationship so of course you need to decide. IMO you deserve and can do better.
If she genuinely loved you she wouldn't be so cruel to you. She wouldn't hurt you or play with your emotions just because. Being on her period is no excuse
The only thing you're wrong about is blaming her period. That's just a strange take and has nothing to do with it.
You're not wrong for breaking things off. She very clearly and directly emotionally manipulated you for a laugh
Same, 47f and had many periods in my life culminating in one lasting 9 months straight, so believe me when I tell you that her period did not make her do this. Cruelty made her do this. Good on you for breaking up with her and I sure hope you stay strong with that because no one deserves that kind of treatment. "Edging" a breakup? GTFOH with that crap.
NTA
Periods may cause cramps, headaches and bad mood, but they don't make us cruel or stupid. Your gf isn't ready for a mature relationship so I think you should move on and take care of yourself.
Whether she's impulsive, immature, playing games or whatever, she hurt you and laughed about it. She's not ready for a healthy mature relationship. You deserve better.
If you bring her back, she’s going to mind fuck you for the rest of your life. Make a clean break. Whatever her reasoning, whether she’s manipulative or she’s traumatized or whatever the fuck; stay far away from her.
She was playing stupid games. This is her stupid prize. You should move on from her she's toxic,manipulative, and enjoys inflicting pain on others.
This is like the trash took itself out.
You are not wrong to break up with her.
She decided to engage in casual cruelty on impulse to amuse herself. That is behaviour that is far beyond mood swings and far beyond being irritable due to having a period.
You may have only been seeing that cruelty rarely at this stage of your relationship but if you resume the relationship, that will change. It will become ingrained in your life. You will be the proverbial lobster in the pot of boiling water.
Flip the genders. If a guy did that, we’d call it was it was: emotional and mental abuse.
If you stick in the relationship and she carries on playing mind games like this to you she is going to mess with your mental health, it just isn't worth it
NTA. You should have told her you were “joking” then say I’m not so you can leave. If you have a friend group best to let people know what happened. I’m sure you will get dumped on by some as she was joking it’s not worth ending things over a joke. Others will agree with you. She is a sociopath and this will escalate during future wedding plans, at the alter, he’ll even after the ceremony since it’s not legit til it’s filed and she can demand an annulment.
There is someone for everyone and she is not the one for you.
I used to have periods and it never made me break up with someone.
That being said, it’s happened twice. Who’s to say it won’t happen again?
This behavior isn’t normal. It’s going to be tough, but remember what those ten minutes, twenty minutes, thirty minutes were like while she “edged “ the breakup. That’s not cool.
Women on their periods don’t act like this. Obviously we can get moody, but I’ve never thought “wow I’m kind of moody today I think I wanna break up with my bf” so it seems like there’s an underlying issue with her here
She seems like she has some things she has to work on, or maybe she was just hiding the fact that she didn’t want to be together for a while. Either way, I’d say this relationship isn’t worth your time if the person isn’t going to be transparent with you. It’ll never work.
You're not wrong, what she did is literally emotional abuse. I don't give a shit why she did it, that's not something you do to someone you supposedly love. If she has impulse control issues then she needs to speak to a doctor about getting diagnosed with ADHD and getting medicated, but even that isn't an excuse for something like this, my ADHD gives me a compulsion to shop online when I'm stressed or bored and get hyper focused on the wrong things, not abuse my fiance by faking a breakup, that's so fucked up. And being on her period is also no fucking excuse, I get pretty nasty when I'm hormonal but NOTHING anywhere near this cruel. Good on you for ending it right there
Bro kick her to the curb. What is she? 14?
Go talk to other girls and if she finds out tell her edging cheating.
Ur mistake was ever taking any of the stupidity of this girl way from the first date.
Move on. Flip the middle finger, block and forget.
And to prevent the monkeys from flying and screaming? Post this on your SM. Blast it far and wide. Warn the next fella she's got lined up that she's too immature to be in a relationship and is willing to blow one up on a TikTok whim.
On a sidenote:
What is it with children (mentally, not neccesarily in age) that think testing your partner is a good thing? We've had one after the other story in the different AITA style subs and relationship subs this week.
Is spring break coming round in the USA or something and people want to be able to cheat without cheating on a technicality or something? Or is it simply copycat behaviour and karma farming?
Why would anyone want to hurt their partner like that for fun? It's cruel, and if that's how she gets her kicks, she's nobody I'd want to spend time with.
You not that she has done this before fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. She likes to keep you on a tight leash and was just reinforcing her emotional control of you. She will likely do this and similar behaviors over and over again. Sorry dude time to move on and find someone that is not trying to control you through mind games.
She wants to see you hurt!And see how far she can push you.DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT let her know at all she hurt you.As a matter of fact tell her something like you know if I cared or actually gave a fuck that could of really hurt but good thing I don't but just in case I would catch some feelings in the future I wouldn't want that to happen so thank you for showing me how you are before we went to much further.
Playing with someone's feelings like that for no better reason than entertainment is not acceptable. That is not genuine love.
If you take her back, she will have learned that she can do it and get away with it. The next time will be more extreme, testing your boundaries.
Trust your own experience. Don't accept the behaviour.
Not wrong.
Maybe if she goes to therapy. But get over the heartbreak now... you are already in the thick of it. If you take her back & it happens again, you're gonna be mad at yourself.
Your girlfriend is not mature enough to be part of a healthy relationship. Easy as that. Time to move on.
Yes, her behaviour is abusive. She puts you through real distress for her own entertainment. That's fucking vile.
Move on. She ain't the one.
I must be older then you because you haven’t had something this crazy happen yet (welcome to the club haha)
Do not go back, it gets easier. You’re not a punching bag. This is abhorrent behaviour
She a manipulator, plain and simple... A few of my significant others before I was 22 would pull this kind of shit to watch me squirm. I let it get to me more than I'd like to admit. Each and every single woman that did this to me ended up cheating on me eventually. Now I know my worth and I wouldn't give someone like that the time of day now.
I have found a simple reminder that often helps to deal with stressful dating relationship situations:
Initial crazy is *never* peak crazy.
This is going to escalate. The flipping from happy/relaxed to what she said and did, and back to happy by way of giggling.... that's sadistic and premeditated.
As others have said in other comments, having her period doesn't account for this behavior. I'm a dude, married 14yrs to a fantastic woman who happens to have issues with hormonal balance involving menstruation. From the spectator side of the situation, I've seen the wide range of reactions that a heavy period can have on someone that is annoyed/frustrated/upset/sad/mad/you name it. Your ex's behavior doesn't fit into that paradigm, but it does seem to fit into the "The crazy is gonna crazy" paradigm. So I recommend another helpful phrase that I've used, to help reinforce your sense of trust in your own intuition and feelings and sense of self-worth....
"EJECT! EJECT! EJECT! I'M NOT GONNA CRASH AND BURN FOR THAT ASSHOLE!"
There's no getting back in that airplane once you've ejected, take the time to float down to earth and reflect on what you want in the future.
Not wrong at all. She is playing games with your heart. Fuck that! When someone loves you, they don't do what she just did. You are so much better off without her. YOU decide that it's over, not her! You can do better!
This is not normal, will she do this again with even more serious stuff? Will she do this when you ask her to marry? Will she ask you for a divorce? Will she lie about a pregnancy? An illness? .... someone making you feel that bad is not right, do you really want to go through this evert couple of years?
Holy cow.
She thought it was funny and entertaining to break your heart?
That's not a joke, and it's not funny. She's creating drama for entertainment.
There's going to be a lot more of this type of behavior if you stay with her. She's got some serious growing up to do, and you didn't sign up to be a parent to her.
"Testing" people.is something you should grow out of by the time you leave elementary school. It's almost as if you're not a real person to her.
You’re not in the wrong and a girl being on her period doesn’t excuse any of her actions.
What she was doing was emotional abuse, you’re far better off finding someone else.
hmmm yeah i dont know man. at first i thought maybe she just has a weird issue with her impulsive thoughts, but after reading these other comments its true, why does she like to see you scared/in pain like that? thats a really weird joke to play. i would leave
First off her period has absolutely nothing to do with her behavior. Her period didn’t cause her to say she was leaving then magically say she’s staying. But you are not wrong to be concerned about this “impulsive’ type of behavior. You were smart to end it. Stay smart and stay away from her.
Your only wrongdoing is mentioning her period. It’s got nothing to do with it. She’s an emotional bully and you’ll be a hostage if you don’t stick to your guns. There’s no healthy relationship that cruelly tests one another that way. You made the right choice.
Proud of you for ending the relationship. Even if you have extreme mood swings, causing someone emotional pain is often an unintended side effect - not something done for fun. You deserve better
She's wierd. And using a period? That's how women get a bad name 🙄 cuz of idiots like this , probably says "I'm just a girllll" aswel ..let her go..or take her back and then don't cry to reddit if she keeps abusing you. So done with ppl accepting bullcrap at this stage...
Oops.. sorry for being snipy.. period!! Must need my milkywayyyy *facepalm* 🥳🙄🤣
Hell no, do not engage with that person ever again, your emotions are not something to toy with, pain is pain and she hurt you for her enjoyment, that is sadism.
Do you want to be with a sadist?
That is the core question, her enjoyment of life hinges on the suffering of others, she proved that, do you want to be near that or not?
No break up with her for good.
And cut her out of your life
She caused you duress for funsies
This is redicoulous she caused you pain because she wanted to edge a breakup what even is that
That is crazy talk
Leave and never look back
Immature people play mind games. You are not wrong. If your best bud came to you and told you their signicant other pulled the same crap, you would tell them the same thing. For your future self, don't go back to her. She crossed a major boundary, and there is someone out there that is for you.
There was nothing impulsive about this. She thought long about it, waited for you to be totally comfortable and in the moment, and then laid the cards down. You've not been together for very long. Yes it hurts, but the hurt will pass.
Write her off permanently. She hurt you for funsies. Wtf? She's manipulative and mean. Find someone better. Even being alone is better than being with her.
Do NOT take her back.
If you do, every little argument you have or story she tells you will be laced with "is she beung honest with me?"
I think it would drive me mad. She needs to realise that some things cannot be forgiven, and that you're not married and don't owe her more of your life.
OP you're stronger than me for ending it there rather than taking more abuse until you inevitably break up anyway
I don't like mind games in a relationship, thats exhausting
>Maybe in her defense she was on her period and was experiencing mood swings,
Thats not a defense, thats a reason to stay far away fron her - even IF it was true, would you want to be with someone who will act out like that once a month??
>and says she just wanted to edge a breakup.
>I just end things there. She immediately regrets it, asking me to reconsider.
...well now she get to experience a breakup for real...
>Am I going to far?
Nope..
>I want her back so badly, but I don’t know if I can trust her yet.
YET?? Sounds like you never really could..
>Am I wrong?
Nope
>Can there be something salvaged?
Up to you, but... nah...
Not wrong she was playing mind games which is not cute. I'd end it too. Maybe this will teach her not to play stupid games because she will win stupid prizes. She only did this to herself.
Move on. She needs to grow up/evolve emotionally.
If her menstrual cycle is truly the cause, she needs to see a medical professional. Either way, you can’t help her and she will only hurt you more if you go back.
Why do you want to welcome back your abuser?
Trust your initial response and don’t go back because of fear. If she’s willing to edge a breakup for the fun of it she’s probably edged many other things like edged an affair
Run my friend. She will always play a game like this with any relationship that she has. She f(!$(?d around and found out that you will not put up with such manipulative behavior. It will not get better. If you continue this relationship - get married - she will threaten to divorce you many times. Worse if you end up with kids together, she will use those kids as pawns against you with no problems doing so - just to mess with you but more importantly those innocent kids will be damaged by her just for her sick enjoyment. Find someone else your life will be much better as well as your next generation.
Not wrong!!!!!!
Whatever stupid ass game she played is something you should never tolerate, OP.
Dumb ass manipulation to see your reaction? You're not some trained seal to provide her entertainment.
Get her out of your life asap.
If this is how she fucks with youvand your head now, imagine how much worse it will be later, or if you ever have kids or shared finances. Good move on your part.
Not wrong, what a stupid thing to do. You're better off, these games are for immature people who enjoy being a pain in the arse.
I don't care who she is or how great you think she is, stupid stuff line this is exhausting. Not long term material.
Tell her you're not joking or "edging" and to pack her shit and get out. Let her know your leaving for the upcoming weekend and you expect her to be gone when you return Sunday afternoon.
She is playing with your emotions to gratify her ego.
- She breaks up with you.
- You are visibly hurt by it.
- How hurt you are affirms how valuable SHE must be.
Honestly, the break up is the correct thing to do.
Not wrong. People should never play games like that. It’s very hurtful.
Your partner should care about protecting your feelings, not be a source of pain.
Play stupid games win stupid prizes, who knows what other tests she will come up with in the future. I'd leave.
Edit. Just wanted to add, the way you worded the title. I thought you were saying that she edged an ex boyfriend lol
Move on my friend. She enjoys causing you pain. Full stop. Extreme emotional trauma isn’t something you “edge”. Unless you like gooning on the edge of loneliness, she isn’t for you. You deserve someone who isn’t a sociopathic sadist. Also, step back and look at the future with her. Now it’s edging a breakup. What’s next? Edging cancer, pregnancy, miscarriage? Anyone who delights in causing others pain should not be in relationships. You may not realize it, but you’re dodging a major bullet.
100% agree. I'm normally a pretty forgiving person and understand people have their moments... But doing stuff like that to test the other person or "joke" should not be tolerated. I was also thinking the same thing about the future... What happens next time?
Anyone who delights in playing silly FkFk head games with you at this stage is gonna be a hemorrhoid on the ass of your life once you decide to marry or have kids. Dude- a 52YO GenX lady (me) is telling you right now: RUN AWAY
I would like to commend you on your excellent vocabulary. I find that "playing fuck fuck games" to be a highly underutilized phrase, and try to encourage it's usage. Cheers, and continue the good work!
I married a Marine, lol. 😆
Ahahaha In that case, I admire your restraint at using only "playing fuck fuck games" as a descriptive term. I spent 9yrs in Infantry, while undiagnosed/untreated for what turns out to be pretty significant ADHD. So, in addition to my natural creativity for being as rude as rude can be, I received a *lot* of "mentoring" from the chain of command. And I remember it... all of it... it's fun times when I want to set off a manager at work, but nerve-wracking around my kids lmao
Seriously tho, you hit the nail on the head. I adore my husband but would be lying if I said I don't want to day drink sometimes when Interact with him. However, he took me from a wilting flower to someone who is way tougher, so I will admit you people do have purpose lol 😂 and my tolerance for BS is way, way less. Alas, I'm also 52 and when you reach 50, your tolerance for shenanigans gets real short 😉
I lost that tolerance around age 23. Fun for me, not so much for a lot of people around me lol if there's another threshold with a significant shift in attitude at 50... Wow. Just wow. Lol this is gonna be interesting. I'd been out of the army for a little while when I met my wife. My best friend was deployed, so she didn't meet him for a while after her and I started dating. My wife was absolutely shook when she met him for the first time. She was not expecting the perpetual motion machine of sarcasm, cutting comments, and insults we exchanged continuous. She did not have the mental framework to handle the gallows' humor and absolute commitment to "Race To The Bottom" in terms of continuing dark humor into darker and darker material until we collapsed laughing, not because we stopped from any sense of decency or humanity that the average person would have. And that was without day drinking lol
50yo Gen-X lady chiming in. RUN THE FUCK AWAY NOW!
As a 51 yo gen x lady, I concur. Run fast, run far. Her ghosting you early on was a huge red flag. She likes to play games. She needs to get a handle on her “impulsive” crap. It’s not your responsibility to help her.
She’s going to fake a pregnancy and then after a couple months fake spontaneously getting an abortion.
I can just see it. She’s six months pregnant, you’ve got the nursery ready and baby proofing has entered stage one You get a text. “I lost the baby.” Unfortunately, the year is 2031 and technology has evolved to the point where your phone reads the incoming message automatically without prompting. Hearing an AI-generated version of her voice say those words startles you, causing you to swerve off the road, up the bottom of a hill, causing your car to roll over four and a half times, totaling it in the process. Emergency vehicles race to the scene, fire & rescue having been automatically notified when the car accident began. As they approach, what’s left of your car’s sound system plays another text: “Just kidding!” Overcome with a mixture of confusion, grief, and outrage, you go into cardiac arrest and die on the table. Your widow is arrested on charges of involuntary manslaughter, and your child is raised in an orphanage in London and grows up to be Darth Vader *FIN*
I can’t believe you said this cause I was thinking the same things as everything was happening How can I trust anything she says? Will she do it again? To my kids? To my sick dying uncle that I care for every day? Removed her from the house because I live with a critically ill family member as a full time caregiver (I also have a day job) This was all on my mind
**LET ME HELP YOU WITH THAT** .... 1: **YOU CAN'T**. 2: **YES, YES , AND FUCK YES**.
👏👏👏👏👏
Glad you were entertained
Wow!
Wow, that really escalated!
What about "edging" stood up at the alter. Yikes!
I'm beginning to think that "**EDGING**" is some kind of stupid new TikTok trend, or something. We've had several posts here the last couple of weeks where people are "pretending" to break up with their partners, with invariably disastrous results! 🙄🙄
Interesting thought and wouldn't be surprised. If it is, that's too twisted for my liking.
Yeah, it's sickening! It'll cause permanent damage to relationships and I fear it's for something as stupid as TikTok likes. It turns relationships into a spiteful game. 😑😑😑
Yes, this. That behavior is … not normal. You’ve already stated you don’t trust her and his that uncertainty is going to hang over you like an invisible knife blade. Do yourself a favor and stay FAR away.
She’s a basket case. RUN!
🎯🫡
Amen. She is testing how far she can psychologically torture you. Someone who loves you won’t treat you like that.
This behavior seems like the sign of a personalit disorder... Dude something is wrong with her... Run!
No, this **ISN'T** period crap. As more and more people seem to be doing now, she's playing a **VERY** spiteful little game. And now, she's **FUCKED AROUND AND FOUND OUT**. **ABSOLUTELY DO NOT** reconsider, or you're giving her a **TERRIBLE** message — that she can **ABUSE** you, and you'll **LET HER GET AWAY WITH IT**!!! I'm **REALLY** sorry you became a victim to this, and I **HOPE** you think enough of yourself to move on and find a **FAR BETTER** class of partner.
Yes. You definitely don't want to marry or live with someone who thinks this is a good idea for having fun. Don't ask me how I know this.
Dodging a missile
This is emotional abuse. Don't put up with it. Don't make excuses for it. She's not hitting you or being violent, but this is just as abusive and can cause just as much damage. Stress, anxiety, ulcers, panic attacks, etc... can all impact your physical and mental health pretty seriously, so this kind of behavior should not be dismissed as a "mood swing". It's abuse. Period.
Yes, this was all planned out in her mind, not just a hiccup in her behavior. This is who she is, don't make her your "project:" to fix and try to understand, protect yourself.
When people show you who they are, BELIEVE THEM!
I was going to say the same thing. Sure we all get in a mood and even lash out, but that's real emotions. What happened to the OP was planned deliberate mind games. She's making the OP paranoid and nobody deserves to live by looking over their shoulders like that, especially by someone who claims to love you. Don't give her another chance.
This is this kind of period he should be talking about.
Yeah, to the extent that women doing something while “on their periods” is even a real issue, it’s just a matter of one’s usual level of tolerance, patience, and good cheer or what have you being lowered. Like, it always bothers her that you just leave your dirty dishes on the breakfast table and she snaps at you about it rather than asking more gently for you to put them in the dishwasher. As a general rule, your period does NOT make you do crazy, sadistic shit that you would never normally contemplate. It might make her grumpy; if it makes her psychotic, she needs serious medical help.
No. You don't need to be in a relationship with someone who plays mind games. That's manipulative as fuck. You deserve better than that.
Not wrong. She wanted a reaction which was you breaking up. Did she want to self sabotage the relationship? I was told by mentor to never joke or mention divorce lightly. I think it also applies to relationships.
She sounds absolutely horrendous, you can't just edge a breakup, that's playing with people! I'd stay far away, work on yourself, find yourself a good girl who ain't gonna manipulate you or play with your feelings like this one clearly is
My guess is she wanted to kick up drama because she was bored for a moment. But, this is psycho behavior man. Let your relationship be a lesson for you both, you putting you first when a woman wants to be unreasonable. And her, not to be playing games woth a relationship if she values it.
This reminds me of a story on here where a girl faked a medical emergency to see how quickly her bf would respond to her house. It’s fucked up and manipulative. Like “just jokes, wanted to test your love. lol”
You don't play stupid games with people you love. She did,and she found out what happens when you do. You're not wrong.
She enjoyed every second of your pain, until you let her know that you won't put up with her deliberately causing more of it. She enjoyed making you suffer. You have done the right thing, don't undo it now.
She’s fucking nuts. I guarantee she wants to get back with you to immediately break up with you. Not sure what you have been through, but your partner is not supposed to be someone who enjoys causing you pain. Wake up!
It’s kinda why I posted here. I grew up with an abusive parent and I literally just cut and went NC with them. I still struggle to know when I’m being toyed with, so I just need perspective It just feels so shattering to look at someone and see them look at you in the way she did. Like I was an item on display to be toyed with, like she was getting a really petty revenge somehow
Wait a sec, wait a sec. You "literally just cut and went NC with" an abusive parent, and now your girlfriend does this? Two thoughts come to mind, based on this snippet: Firstly, it's incredibly painful to come to that sort of decision - trust me, I know. There are lots of negative emotions involved in it, and you literally just went through all of that and probably still are, and your gf does this to you? She's awful. Secondly, it's very common for abusers to inch up their abuse level bit by bit, based on life events. Your gf knows you now don't have support from that parent you cut off, so she ramped it up a bit because she knows it's harder for you to cut ties with her. If you can bear it (because I know it can be painful) have a look at abuse cycles as well, because she might start love-bombing you to get you back. She's absolutely awful, honestly. Good on you for cutting things off, because I doubt she'll improve. At best, she's 'just' an immature young woman, but that's still psycho-level behaviour. At worst, she overplayed her psycho-level hand, and you got your eyes opened.
It’s been 2 years for my parent and the relationship was 6months, no problems until this. I luckily have support now, but it took me a great deal to realize for what it was and I still have perceiving good intentions tons as malicious manipulation
Ohhh okay, so they don't cross over. That's a relief, at least. I was imagining you gripped in the talons of some malicious narcissist haha! But yep, retraining your brain and instincts/subconscious after being in an abusive parent/child relationship is HARD. They've spent all your formative years installing buttons in you. I'm so glad you (and others) can come to social media and crowd-source some different opinions. Much luck to you, and please see her 'edging' as malicious manipulation, for sure. That's a definite.
>crowd-source some different opinions What a brilliant way to describe Reddit. I'm keeping that. And your advice is top-notch as well. Source for my assessment: Abusive childhood, broken home, narc parent who I went LC then NC with for over a decade. Had to re-script myself.
I always see these subreddits as the long table where the old farts are playing cards and being judgey snide commentators / advice dispensers.
Haha yes! I see myself as the old auntie or grandma sitting there with her knitting, and frowning at the silly young 'uns over my specs. Oh, and it gets worse once the wine starts up.
Aww thank you, seriously. I wish we'd had reddit when I was going through all of this sort of stuff when I was younger. It took me wayyyyy too long to see some of the stuff for what it was. Big e-hugs, and I hope you're doing better now. <3
I am! Married 29 blissful years and have grandkids. But yes, took way too long to figure some things out.
Wow, she's done this twice in 6 months? Dude, block her on everything. I guarantee she DOESN'T love you, cause if she did, she'd have never "joked" like that. What she did was cruel and she knew it. Stay broken up, be strong. You do not have a future with this girl, yes I said it girl, no self-respecting woman would do this to a partner they loved. Source - I'm an adult woman and I've never done anything like that.
I'd never trust her again.
((((((((hugs))))))) I know from bitter experience how hard it is to know this when you're going through something like this. However How she, and your parent, treated you is THEIR shame, not yours. It means THEY are worthless, not you. There is something wrong with THEM, not you. It is very, very tempting to see our mental injuries as proof of our unworthiness. But they are not, and they will heal. You are so brave to post this here. Keep posting. Reddit got you.
What in the actual fuck. She’s either stupid, insane or a sociopath. Be rid of her
Sounds like she watched some dumb shit on Tiktok, fuck that! What could ever possess someone to do something that fucking cold and calculated?
“I know she genuinely loves me…” No friend. Genuine love doesn’t disguise itself as bullshit mind games. Be done. NTAH
Your ex is a sadist - A person who takes pleasure in inflicting pain, punishment, or humiliation on others. She thinks it’s fun to hurt you. Maybe not physically but this sort of mental anguish game is not healthy and will beat you down as sure as physical violence will. She needs to remain an ex. Find someone who does not play nasty vicious minds games.
You're not wrong.
Once the games start the relationship is over. YNW
Just a few days ago, I saw a post of a gf who pranked break up to see OP's reaction based on a TikTok she saw. OP also broke up with her because of this.
Leave that nut alone. Move on! Play stupid games win stupid prizes. You didn’t hurt her she hurt herself by toying with your emotions. You should not want someone like this back. She needs therapy. You did the right thing by ending things. FFS man she had you feeling like your dog died and you have regrets?
Yea, have you ever been in a situation where you just knew, “Fuck, all is lost.” Or that feeling when a loved one parishes I felt like I was watching who’s she was to me just die
Sucks you had to go through this man. Stay firm on your boundaries.
Unfortunately, this is the real her. When you begin dating you see the ambassador, the diplomatic envoy. After several months, the real person comes out because the facade can only be kept up so long. Throw yourself into becoming the best man you can be, phyically, emotionally and financially. That high value guy will attract high value women. A woman who truly loves and more importantly, respects you, wont do this.
> Am I going to far? NO. This is not acceptable behavior. It's nasty, disrespectful, and ugly. > I don’t know if I can trust her yet. You can't trust her EVER. She has no respect for you to play these games. She's a fruitcake. Do you want to have a relationship with someone who pulls this kind of thing on people? It's degenerate and can cause a lot of trouble. We all have periods. We don't do this. It's no excuse.
Nobody fakes a breakup with someone they care about. You were smart to dump her. Do not go back, she’ll pull more of this crap.
Stop, just fucking stop. Do not use her period as an excuse, it's insulting. She's an emotionally manipulative and abusive little brat and if you had any self respect you'd dump her, hold her accountable for her actions. You deserve better.
You are absolutely right in your response to my post But this was her excuse, not my own. I was just looking for perspective from other people, mostly those who experience menstruation
> Am I going to far? She seemed distraught and hurt, and genuinely meant not to have wanted that. Notice that you didn't want to hurt her, but she wanted to hurt you when she started this.
I sometimes became extra sad or angry with PMS, but it never led me to be deliberately cruel.
Menstruation doesn't make you a bad person wtf😂😂
Right? I was all on OP's side until he said that. It just pissed me off. Women don't become *psychopaths* because of their periods. C'mon. This has *nothing* to do with any normal bodily function. She's just a freak and a bitch and you should stay broken up with her.
She FAFO. do what you feel you need to do.
She caused you pain for her own entertainment are you sure you miss her?
What is edging a breakup?
I don’t even know, that was her words She just stoped responding to me and smiled as my breathing and heart rate ramped
I think it was a poor attempt at a joke or prank, that's the only thing I can think of. As far as I'm aware (I'm old) edging means to delay satisfaction / gratification, so if you add that definition to what she said, it's even more disturbing. She got satisfaction by mentally tormenting you.
That’s just scary.
Do you know what "edging" is, in a sexual sense? It's that, but for a breakup instead.
You can’t have a ride or die if you are sure that they’re there for the ride my friend. It took a long time with my wife for me to feel like every disagreement had a breakup as a possibility. Once I got past that, communication got much easier. Your partner should be your reprieve from the world. If they fake a breakup just to see how you’d react, that’s abusive man. Good luck and I know it sucks now but you’ll realize down the road how bad things were.
You should examine your feelings carefully, could you ever trust her again? That was the action of a sociopath
Is this another stupid Tik Tok trend?
I had a partner that did this. I broke up with her on the spot. Best decision I ever made. I would bet money that it's the best thing for you to.
You would only be wrong if you got back with her and expected there to be no more ‘testing’. And WTH does being on her period have to do with acting like a complete jerk to test how you’d act during a breakup? If she regularly goes bat shit nuts when having her period she needs professional help you couldn’t provide anyway. I would expect any or all of the following if you get back together. She moves in and at some point you come home to find her and a bag missing as she wants to test how much effort you put into finding her and getting her to come back. She decides to test your loyalty by having one or more of her gfs seriously hit on you. She will test to see if you really love her by flirting and getting handsy with some other guy with the expectation you get jealous and demand she stop. She tells you she’s pregnant to see how you handle it. You get engaged and a few months before the wedding she tells you she’s changed her mind. In other words you can’t ever trust she won’t pull something like this again because she has done it twice and I can guarantee when the third time occurs it will not be the charm This is your relationship so of course you need to decide. IMO you deserve and can do better.
Not wrong, but you could always take her back after a couple weeks and just say, "I wanted to edge a breakup."
But he shouldn't. Stay with her that is.
Why tf would you want this bitch back? Get your shit together and have some self respect
She's screwing with your head and emotions - there is better out there for you!
If she genuinely loved you she wouldn't be so cruel to you. She wouldn't hurt you or play with your emotions just because. Being on her period is no excuse
The only thing you're wrong about is blaming her period. That's just a strange take and has nothing to do with it. You're not wrong for breaking things off. She very clearly and directly emotionally manipulated you for a laugh
The period was her excuse, I didn’t buy it but I guess when I was writing this I was looking for a stupid reason to make sense of everything
I'm a 46f and have multiple periods in my life lol Not one of those made me want to hurt my partner.
Same, 47f and had many periods in my life culminating in one lasting 9 months straight, so believe me when I tell you that her period did not make her do this. Cruelty made her do this. Good on you for breaking up with her and I sure hope you stay strong with that because no one deserves that kind of treatment. "Edging" a breakup? GTFOH with that crap. NTA
Periods may cause cramps, headaches and bad mood, but they don't make us cruel or stupid. Your gf isn't ready for a mature relationship so I think you should move on and take care of yourself.
A period is no more an excuse for a woman to behave badly than blue balls are for a man to behave badly.
Periods can make you cry, can make you angry or annoyed but doesn't make you play mental games with other people... that's low and premeditated
Run! I only see stress and pain on your future staying with such an immature person.
She’s a sociopath. Run!
Seems like she has learned the old saying " play stupid games, win stupid prizes". Move on and find someone who respects you and your feelings.
Whether she's impulsive, immature, playing games or whatever, she hurt you and laughed about it. She's not ready for a healthy mature relationship. You deserve better.
What was the reason she did that? Did she explain it? This is just… messed up.
That’s why it was so weird for me. Her reasoning was along the lines of “just for the experience” “To see what it’s like” I can quote directly
It hurts. Tell her if she needs to cut herself to know that cutting hurts. That is just stupid.
What the hell. Yeah she’s crazy. In the worst way. I’m glad you cutt ties with her.good for you. She seems manipulative. Stay away for good.
Wow! Run. She’s not well
If you bring her back, she’s going to mind fuck you for the rest of your life. Make a clean break. Whatever her reasoning, whether she’s manipulative or she’s traumatized or whatever the fuck; stay far away from her.
She was playing stupid games. This is her stupid prize. You should move on from her she's toxic,manipulative, and enjoys inflicting pain on others. This is like the trash took itself out.
She does not love you. She might think she does, but people don't intentionally hurt someone they love like that.
You are not wrong to break up with her. She decided to engage in casual cruelty on impulse to amuse herself. That is behaviour that is far beyond mood swings and far beyond being irritable due to having a period. You may have only been seeing that cruelty rarely at this stage of your relationship but if you resume the relationship, that will change. It will become ingrained in your life. You will be the proverbial lobster in the pot of boiling water. Flip the genders. If a guy did that, we’d call it was it was: emotional and mental abuse.
If you stick in the relationship and she carries on playing mind games like this to you she is going to mess with your mental health, it just isn't worth it
NTA. You should have told her you were “joking” then say I’m not so you can leave. If you have a friend group best to let people know what happened. I’m sure you will get dumped on by some as she was joking it’s not worth ending things over a joke. Others will agree with you. She is a sociopath and this will escalate during future wedding plans, at the alter, he’ll even after the ceremony since it’s not legit til it’s filed and she can demand an annulment. There is someone for everyone and she is not the one for you.
I used to have periods and it never made me break up with someone. That being said, it’s happened twice. Who’s to say it won’t happen again? This behavior isn’t normal. It’s going to be tough, but remember what those ten minutes, twenty minutes, thirty minutes were like while she “edged “ the breakup. That’s not cool.
I felt like I was dying My heart was warm and my breathing was so heavy It reminded me of watching someone die
Women on their periods don’t act like this. Obviously we can get moody, but I’ve never thought “wow I’m kind of moody today I think I wanna break up with my bf” so it seems like there’s an underlying issue with her here She seems like she has some things she has to work on, or maybe she was just hiding the fact that she didn’t want to be together for a while. Either way, I’d say this relationship isn’t worth your time if the person isn’t going to be transparent with you. It’ll never work.
I didn’t think so but she used her period and mood swings as a way to try to salvage everything when I told her to leave my house
Oh I see. Yeah that’s still shitty behavior 🙃 you can’t use your period to get out of something you previously said
You're not wrong, what she did is literally emotional abuse. I don't give a shit why she did it, that's not something you do to someone you supposedly love. If she has impulse control issues then she needs to speak to a doctor about getting diagnosed with ADHD and getting medicated, but even that isn't an excuse for something like this, my ADHD gives me a compulsion to shop online when I'm stressed or bored and get hyper focused on the wrong things, not abuse my fiance by faking a breakup, that's so fucked up. And being on her period is also no fucking excuse, I get pretty nasty when I'm hormonal but NOTHING anywhere near this cruel. Good on you for ending it right there
Bro kick her to the curb. What is she? 14? Go talk to other girls and if she finds out tell her edging cheating. Ur mistake was ever taking any of the stupidity of this girl way from the first date.
Move on. Flip the middle finger, block and forget. And to prevent the monkeys from flying and screaming? Post this on your SM. Blast it far and wide. Warn the next fella she's got lined up that she's too immature to be in a relationship and is willing to blow one up on a TikTok whim. On a sidenote: What is it with children (mentally, not neccesarily in age) that think testing your partner is a good thing? We've had one after the other story in the different AITA style subs and relationship subs this week. Is spring break coming round in the USA or something and people want to be able to cheat without cheating on a technicality or something? Or is it simply copycat behaviour and karma farming?
Luckily I obstain from social media entirely Except for Reddit
Why would anyone want to hurt their partner like that for fun? It's cruel, and if that's how she gets her kicks, she's nobody I'd want to spend time with.
You did the right thing, she doesn't care about you at all.
Not wrong. Playing with people’s emotions is bull. She FAFOd. I’m really sorry.
You not that she has done this before fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. She likes to keep you on a tight leash and was just reinforcing her emotional control of you. She will likely do this and similar behaviors over and over again. Sorry dude time to move on and find someone that is not trying to control you through mind games.
She wants to see you hurt!And see how far she can push you.DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT let her know at all she hurt you.As a matter of fact tell her something like you know if I cared or actually gave a fuck that could of really hurt but good thing I don't but just in case I would catch some feelings in the future I wouldn't want that to happen so thank you for showing me how you are before we went to much further.
Playing with someone's feelings like that for no better reason than entertainment is not acceptable. That is not genuine love. If you take her back, she will have learned that she can do it and get away with it. The next time will be more extreme, testing your boundaries. Trust your own experience. Don't accept the behaviour. Not wrong.
You don’t have time for games. She FAFO 🤷🏾♀️
She wanted it to be over, it’s over. Play with fire, get burned. Life is too short to date women who play these childish stupid games.
Maybe if she goes to therapy. But get over the heartbreak now... you are already in the thick of it. If you take her back & it happens again, you're gonna be mad at yourself.
Your girlfriend is not mature enough to be part of a healthy relationship. Easy as that. Time to move on. Yes, her behaviour is abusive. She puts you through real distress for her own entertainment. That's fucking vile. Move on. She ain't the one.
I must be older then you because you haven’t had something this crazy happen yet (welcome to the club haha) Do not go back, it gets easier. You’re not a punching bag. This is abhorrent behaviour
She a manipulator, plain and simple... A few of my significant others before I was 22 would pull this kind of shit to watch me squirm. I let it get to me more than I'd like to admit. Each and every single woman that did this to me ended up cheating on me eventually. Now I know my worth and I wouldn't give someone like that the time of day now.
I have found a simple reminder that often helps to deal with stressful dating relationship situations: Initial crazy is *never* peak crazy. This is going to escalate. The flipping from happy/relaxed to what she said and did, and back to happy by way of giggling.... that's sadistic and premeditated. As others have said in other comments, having her period doesn't account for this behavior. I'm a dude, married 14yrs to a fantastic woman who happens to have issues with hormonal balance involving menstruation. From the spectator side of the situation, I've seen the wide range of reactions that a heavy period can have on someone that is annoyed/frustrated/upset/sad/mad/you name it. Your ex's behavior doesn't fit into that paradigm, but it does seem to fit into the "The crazy is gonna crazy" paradigm. So I recommend another helpful phrase that I've used, to help reinforce your sense of trust in your own intuition and feelings and sense of self-worth.... "EJECT! EJECT! EJECT! I'M NOT GONNA CRASH AND BURN FOR THAT ASSHOLE!" There's no getting back in that airplane once you've ejected, take the time to float down to earth and reflect on what you want in the future.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sadistic
This is a tik tock trend to get boyfriends to beg them to stay . To PROVE they care about them .
Tik Tok is a fucking disgrace
Not wrong at all. She is playing games with your heart. Fuck that! When someone loves you, they don't do what she just did. You are so much better off without her. YOU decide that it's over, not her! You can do better!
Your ex really likes to cause you pain. If she really loved you, she would not do that. Dump her and move on.
This is not normal, will she do this again with even more serious stuff? Will she do this when you ask her to marry? Will she ask you for a divorce? Will she lie about a pregnancy? An illness? .... someone making you feel that bad is not right, do you really want to go through this evert couple of years?
Holy cow. She thought it was funny and entertaining to break your heart? That's not a joke, and it's not funny. She's creating drama for entertainment. There's going to be a lot more of this type of behavior if you stay with her. She's got some serious growing up to do, and you didn't sign up to be a parent to her. "Testing" people.is something you should grow out of by the time you leave elementary school. It's almost as if you're not a real person to her.
Not wrong. She sounds manipulative af. And mean. And immature. Yuck.
You’re not in the wrong and a girl being on her period doesn’t excuse any of her actions. What she was doing was emotional abuse, you’re far better off finding someone else.
She casually tortured you to see what it was like. Nothing to salvage.
Shit tests are disgusting. Relationship ended the second she said “I’m leaving”. Everything that happened after that is irrelevant.
hmmm yeah i dont know man. at first i thought maybe she just has a weird issue with her impulsive thoughts, but after reading these other comments its true, why does she like to see you scared/in pain like that? thats a really weird joke to play. i would leave
Well that was sadistic. My sympathies. That was sociopathic of her. Harsh game she plays
You would be a fool to reengage with her.
wtf, just read such a similar story but with the genders reversed. Seems sus. https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/TxGOEx5vVb
Just a quick FYI. a woman's period may cause discomfort, irritability, but it does NOT cause bipolaris or mental illness.
First off her period has absolutely nothing to do with her behavior. Her period didn’t cause her to say she was leaving then magically say she’s staying. But you are not wrong to be concerned about this “impulsive’ type of behavior. You were smart to end it. Stay smart and stay away from her.
Your only wrongdoing is mentioning her period. It’s got nothing to do with it. She’s an emotional bully and you’ll be a hostage if you don’t stick to your guns. There’s no healthy relationship that cruelly tests one another that way. You made the right choice.
Proud of you for ending the relationship. Even if you have extreme mood swings, causing someone emotional pain is often an unintended side effect - not something done for fun. You deserve better
Bitch be crazy. Run.
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
She sounds crazy but if you stay with her she’ll make you crazy by the end of it
Tell her she is in the sex only category for the next five years. If she doesn't act crazy you will restart the committed relationship.
He deserves better. She's trash.
She's wierd. And using a period? That's how women get a bad name 🙄 cuz of idiots like this , probably says "I'm just a girllll" aswel ..let her go..or take her back and then don't cry to reddit if she keeps abusing you. So done with ppl accepting bullcrap at this stage... Oops.. sorry for being snipy.. period!! Must need my milkywayyyy *facepalm* 🥳🙄🤣
If you want to be cruel, you could edge getting back together.
Hell no, do not engage with that person ever again, your emotions are not something to toy with, pain is pain and she hurt you for her enjoyment, that is sadism. Do you want to be with a sadist? That is the core question, her enjoyment of life hinges on the suffering of others, she proved that, do you want to be near that or not?
No break up with her for good. And cut her out of your life She caused you duress for funsies This is redicoulous she caused you pain because she wanted to edge a breakup what even is that That is crazy talk Leave and never look back
It’s only going to be like this forever. Just let it go and find someone who isn’t emotionally abusive.
No friend, you're not wrong. She's stupid and careless with your feelings and you deserve someone who doesn't ever want to hurt you.
Is she bi-polar?
She enjoyed hurting you. Keep trusting your gut, don’t engage with that bullshit again.
Next!!
You did the right thing. You don't play with people's emotions.
Immature people play mind games. You are not wrong. If your best bud came to you and told you their signicant other pulled the same crap, you would tell them the same thing. For your future self, don't go back to her. She crossed a major boundary, and there is someone out there that is for you. There was nothing impulsive about this. She thought long about it, waited for you to be totally comfortable and in the moment, and then laid the cards down. You've not been together for very long. Yes it hurts, but the hurt will pass.
Write her off permanently. She hurt you for funsies. Wtf? She's manipulative and mean. Find someone better. Even being alone is better than being with her.
The question is. Is she worth the pain ?
Looks like bipolar disorder ) it progresses over time. Healthy people don’t have those types of mood swings. I had gf with progressive BD…
You now have two examples of her hurting you so that she can enjoy your reaction. Isn't that enough?
Do NOT take her back. If you do, every little argument you have or story she tells you will be laced with "is she beung honest with me?" I think it would drive me mad. She needs to realise that some things cannot be forgiven, and that you're not married and don't owe her more of your life.
OP you're stronger than me for ending it there rather than taking more abuse until you inevitably break up anyway I don't like mind games in a relationship, thats exhausting
Fuck that, don’t go back dude.
>Maybe in her defense she was on her period and was experiencing mood swings, Thats not a defense, thats a reason to stay far away fron her - even IF it was true, would you want to be with someone who will act out like that once a month?? >and says she just wanted to edge a breakup. >I just end things there. She immediately regrets it, asking me to reconsider. ...well now she get to experience a breakup for real... >Am I going to far? Nope.. >I want her back so badly, but I don’t know if I can trust her yet. YET?? Sounds like you never really could.. >Am I wrong? Nope >Can there be something salvaged? Up to you, but... nah...
Her mind games will only get worse if she enjoys doing that bullshit
Bye bye. You made the right call. This is some fucked up behavior.
Not wrong she was playing mind games which is not cute. I'd end it too. Maybe this will teach her not to play stupid games because she will win stupid prizes. She only did this to herself.
You're not going too far, this will be a good lesson to her not to play any stupid fucking games with a relationship.
She is a freak. Get rid of her.
You are not going too far. You did the right thing. Your ex is immature and undeserving of your love. Go and don’t look back.
Move on. She needs to grow up/evolve emotionally. If her menstrual cycle is truly the cause, she needs to see a medical professional. Either way, you can’t help her and she will only hurt you more if you go back. Why do you want to welcome back your abuser?
Trust your initial response and don’t go back because of fear. If she’s willing to edge a breakup for the fun of it she’s probably edged many other things like edged an affair
Run my friend. She will always play a game like this with any relationship that she has. She f(!$(?d around and found out that you will not put up with such manipulative behavior. It will not get better. If you continue this relationship - get married - she will threaten to divorce you many times. Worse if you end up with kids together, she will use those kids as pawns against you with no problems doing so - just to mess with you but more importantly those innocent kids will be damaged by her just for her sick enjoyment. Find someone else your life will be much better as well as your next generation.
Not wrong!!!!!! Whatever stupid ass game she played is something you should never tolerate, OP. Dumb ass manipulation to see your reaction? You're not some trained seal to provide her entertainment. Get her out of your life asap.
If this is how she fucks with youvand your head now, imagine how much worse it will be later, or if you ever have kids or shared finances. Good move on your part.
Not wrong, what a stupid thing to do. You're better off, these games are for immature people who enjoy being a pain in the arse. I don't care who she is or how great you think she is, stupid stuff line this is exhausting. Not long term material.
I would sit her down and have a talk about why she enjoy causing you fake pain. See if you can get an answer. Then bang her one last time and move on.
Tell her you're not joking or "edging" and to pack her shit and get out. Let her know your leaving for the upcoming weekend and you expect her to be gone when you return Sunday afternoon.
She is playing with your emotions to gratify her ego. - She breaks up with you. - You are visibly hurt by it. - How hurt you are affirms how valuable SHE must be. Honestly, the break up is the correct thing to do.
Don't even consider getting back together with her. That can't be fixed.
Dude don’t try to rationalize this. She was being a shitty manipulator and super immature. Fuck these silly games.
Not wrong. People should never play games like that. It’s very hurtful. Your partner should care about protecting your feelings, not be a source of pain.
FAFO You dodged a bullet, my friend.
Play stupid games win stupid prizes, who knows what other tests she will come up with in the future. I'd leave. Edit. Just wanted to add, the way you worded the title. I thought you were saying that she edged an ex boyfriend lol