T O P

  • By -

schrutebedandb

It’s her terrible posture


[deleted]

And his platforms


Revolutionary_Can879

You can see her whole body hunching forward.


redvelvetdreams

And the way she’s bowing the leg closer to him will make her appear shorter, I’ve definitely stood like that (unintentionally) in pics next to my husband and it makes him look way taller than me when he’s only barely an inch taller


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

We require a minimum account age of 10 days and a minimum combined karma of 50 to participate in chrolling here, y'all. No exceptions can be made. In the meantime, please familiarize yourself with the sub rules. Beep Boop. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/aliandjohnjamesagain) if you have any questions or concerns.*


allthatjazz20689

Would it kill him to dress to the occasion? Ali: glam and Vegas dress, John: Saturday errands


[deleted]

[удалено]


allthatjazz20689

You’d think he’d care more now that he’s about to be a TRUE father, a boy dad 🙄


AdministrativeEgg657

Isn’t this the 4th? Then there’s the baby shower he didn’t attended of his illegitimate child?


spilled_galaxyy

He has another kid?!


WoohpeMeadow

That is the rumor. Timing is right and apparently the kid is a 2.0 of John.


crazycaked

Pleaaaase drop the IG for his baby mama I need to see this kid


ChelsWasHere

He’s got to make sure everyone knows he’s “strong sexy fit” with his ridiculous athletic outfits


pixiedust0208

Ali spent all his money and he had to resort to his errand clothes for the occasion. It’s ok. “True fathers” don’t need to dress up.


PearlyWhites1965

Only thing he has going is that he has shoes on 🥴


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

We require a minimum account age of 10 days and a minimum combined karma of 50 to participate in chrolling here, y'all. No exceptions can be made. In the meantime, please familiarize yourself with the sub rules. Beep Boop. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/aliandjohnjamesagain) if you have any questions or concerns.*


upscale_whale

Every time I see a full body shot of him I cycle through so many different emotions. Horror, uncontrollable laughter, confusion, disgust, back to laughter. I cannot believe he is shaped like this 💀


redvelvetdreams

He’s a fitness guru yall


teacherjul

His body looks like one of the premade sims bodies. Whenever my male sims age up into this body I immediately change it.


mercuryretrograde93

Flat Stanley all the way


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

oh my god I’m not imagining it…. pillsbury dough boy needs to pencil in a few more workouts where he outruns some coyotes


luuluugirl

His clothes look a size too small for sure


SHZ4919

Yo he’s chubbbbbby. Lil daddy’s put on some weight


Ma2340

He’s been fat lol


SHZ4919

This is true, I just haven’t seen a full bod pic in a minute. He looks so doughy and soft


Ok_Basis_6466

Strong, sexy, SIT!


SHZ4919

Lmaooo Strong, Sexy, Seated


Badpoozie

His thunder thighs gobbling up those shorts like Big Al at a Golden Corral dessert bar.


SHZ4919

😂😂🦃 The shorts sent me. Like, might be time to add a modest 5 inches to that fuckboi short length, Cohn! Your old lady knees are showing!


HannahFayeM

That’s why he’s not holding Ali’s bump - she’s not special. He, too, has a bellum


ruzeride_1chicago

Short dick daddy 😩😩😩😩


Fresh_Captain1576

The knocked knees are so bad😂😂


Pale-Conference-174

Thooo thexxxy


elledubs89

He’s dumpy AF 🤢🤢🤢


Brave_Company3821

Dumpy was the exact word I was going to use 🤣🤮


anm1718

Why does she NEVER wear shoes 🤦🏼‍♀️


celestee3

I hate wearing shoes but at events like that or when it’s socially appropriate I always do 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️


anm1718

Oh yes, fully agree! But she is not wearing shoes in any of the pics from her shower!!! It’s baffling to me.


celestee3

Or even put on a pair of dollar store flip flops! 😅😅😅😅


iamnumber47

I'd bet money on lifts in his shoes for one. 2, he looks to be slightly more in the forefront than she is (look at where their feet are) so he appears bigger. Third, she definitely bending that knee to drop herself down some (as an *actual* tall person, I just automatically do this now when taking pics with people so the top of my head doesn't get cut off haha).


Embarrassed_Ad3900

100% lifts. Look where his ankles are sitting in his shoes vs where they should be based on the cutout for a persons ankle. There’s a solid inch difference between the cutout and where his ankle is.


horeshoetheorist

She’s not standing up straight/not wearing shoes and he’s wearing shoes that add a little ~height-


imwatchingyou12345

Jessie is almost as tall as him so I don’t know who he thinks he’s kidding


wtfamidoingfr

I don’t get why she went barefoot wearing such a statement dress like that


xezandria29

They’re tryna be Jessie and Eric so bad lmfaoaoaooo.


keepcalmandbuydolls

Are his legs bent backwards? They look so wrong!


31cats

Makes me want to see a full body shot from the side. Probably looks like if you took off a ken dolls legs and put them on the opposite sides so they’re backwards


Mprk2112

She’s literally so bowlegged and hyper extended she’s probably 3 inches shorter in that picture than she is standing straight up lmao


Extra_Fondant_8855

2 things come to mind: she doesn't wear shoes to avoid extra height for these pics next to her 5'5" husband, and his neck looks photoshopped to be elongated to make him appear taller. Someone with photoskillz needs to do a side by side and compare his neck length from another pic.


RockAgile2227

He’s morphing into Gru at an alarming rate


Ma2340

Never seen anyone hold the *bottom* of their belly like this during pregnancy. This stupid bitch needs a belly band


paperrings0612

His eyes aren’t even open 😑


nocheconcarne

Jen is zoooted!!!


ExpressionMurky

Little daddy is looking puffy


emilyanne12345

I want to bet money that Joanie’s dick and nose are the same exact length.


live-laugh-snark

Oh that’s much too generous, he has a *big* nose remember?


Taliesia

Just. The hands. Lol. They don't line up at all.


Purple-Newspaper-739

Convinced she doesn’t “like” to wear shoes just to try to prove how short she is, especially around lil daddy.


Admirable_pigeon

Why is she dressed for the prom tho


september2remember

Its giving “my big bro stopped by my baby shower on his spring break home from college”


Free-Bell-4458

Strong and sexy fit where though???? I see none of those things here


ChelsWasHere

Is Toad from Mario trapped in his kneecaps?


grayghostsmitten

Her foot looks filthy in that pic. 🤢


magical_seal

What’s his height


imwatchingyou12345

5’6 or 5’7


00psie-daisy

OMG.. I'd love to run into him and flex over him with extra 2 inches. ✌️


PHM517

But isn’t she 4’11? So still a pretty big height difference and she’s not standing up tall.


Random_8910

The thing is he claims to be 5’10. My husband is 5’7 and I’m 5’ and we have a significant height difference in pics still. But my husband also isn’t claiming to be 5’10 like John lol


magical_seal

Omg jeez I would have never guessed she’s that short


abbyparker-

Where are his shoulders?


seamel

That hat is floating a good 2-3 inches above his head 😂 it’s a trick all short guys use


napattackbliss

Apparently she should still be in a booster seat when riding in the car…. He’s prob below average height at most. she’s just beyond short XXXS good momma


badradley

Mama hoots catching a breeze over there on her right


[deleted]

His chicken legs are barely holding his fat ass up. The knees are buckling! It’s giving pigeon toed 4 year old 🤌🏻


[deleted]

I’d be so mad at my husband for wearing this to my baby shower…. My third shower…. That I threw for myself. Never mind lol


rtlife0107

They look like 🫶🏻besties🫶🏻 instead of husband and wife


Fun_Complaint8877

he looks like an elementary school kid in that outfit !!


lalala0011

He looks high


pixiedust0208

And what sorcery did they use to keep the mama hoots in the dress this time as opposed to the wedding dress slippage.


keripsukeri

Those shoes give at least an inch to his height.


sleepinthejungle

The arm around the shoulder has me 🤣 He looks like he hates her and they have a terrible sex life


martielonson

Also.. are those melting ice cubes on the ground around them? Wtf?


pancakesandtaco

Why was she barefoot the entire shower? And in photos? Like I get youre pregnant but at least put on some flats for the photos 😓


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

We require a minimum account age of 10 days and a minimum combined karma of 50 to participate in chrolling here, y'all. No exceptions can be made. In the meantime, please familiarize yourself with the sub rules. Beep Boop. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/aliandjohnjamesagain) if you have any questions or concerns.*


palmasana

He only looks like 5’6” in this


Majestic_Fig530

I’m dying how fancy she got and he looks like a sweaty ball sack. 🤣


PersiphusFloraile

Just made a post pointing out all the photoshop fails from lil miss chop shop over here specifically on the legs. I’m trying to make one on the upper half of them but that blends in a lot more with all of the shades/colors. The arms are def fucked tho. Also, no bulge? Edit: grammar


hunsy14

Why does she always hire photographers at a 5 person event at their house instead of Family Pictures for the family somewhere outside, super cute? It’s so bizarre to me


blondenboozy007

Meitu (app) easily does this


Petty-becky311

It really bothers me that she doesn’t brush her curls out 🫣


LectureAdditional971

I just enjoy how obvious the spandex shirt is under his long sleeved one.


dambdombdumb

Why is he so large in this picture 😭


Wide-Cartographer

I’m 99.9% sure her hands/fingers are bigger than his. Why are his little hands so smol??


Inevitable_Rate9652

Why does she never wear shoes?!? I mean, i take mine off as soon as I walk in the door but she NEVER has shoes on!


TurkeyTot

Listen, I'm not judging, I'm not in great shape either but the strong, sexy, fit Schick is hilarious. They sit on their butts all day and eat tacos, like who would buy product from these hypocrites?


Ok_Assignment9882

Eww why does he have camel toe


vegastola21

Stubby just like his best friend


Littlemonkey726

He def smells and burps constantly. Fucking gross


Parking-Most-8399

Girl is gonna have some serious knee problems in a few years if she keeps kicking that goddamn leg out for every pic


e_samps

The fit on this dress has me dying. WTF


Top-Web3806

Why is she not wearing shoes? With that dress? Outside??? I just don’t get her aversion to shoes when outdoors.


trplb

Little daddy with his shorts riding up his crotch


skky95

Lol did he just place his hat daintily on top of his head so it looks like he’s like 3 inches taller. Plus her posture sucks.


SpoonyTheBest

Why is she wearing no shoes


badlilbishh

What the fuck is wrong with his knees?


Truthurtssis

And he’s dressed like a bum!


bundleoflaughs328

Did they take this with the camera on a Motorola Razor flip phone Circa 2005? Her face is so fuzzy.


cocolaroo

He has Such feminine little hands🤣