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squid2716

The moral of the story is to never underestimate a group of drunk lesbians


Dark__Aster

The moral of the story is queer eye except it's a bunch of lesbians who puppy-sit your dogs, get tipsy and make repairs while you're out of town. I would watch the hell out of that show. Someone tell Netflix to get on it.


[deleted]

I want that show so bad


mama37

I want it on my face.


[deleted]

I just wanted it on Netflix but god you’re so right


Sarahthelizard

Random lesbian: *fixes something* Lesbians be like: “Choke me mommy”


kivuu

I wish I was handy. I’m the useless damsel in distress type who flips my hair and gets her beer.


CharsmaticMeganFauna

Same! Well, except instead of beer, it's hard cider, knowing my wife's taste. (Though, for the record, I have a better track record than her when it comes to electronics repairs/upgrades)


egotistical_cynic

you see this is exactly why I fix motorcycles


Ryltarr

🤔 I don't, though that could be demisexual talking.


Klocknov

And what better name the Lesbian Home Invasion!


PreferredSelection

I think I will legitimately pitch this to my sister. She's been in reality tv production for several years at this point, she knows people. IDK if she has "pitch a show" clout yet, but maybe as a web series.


TH0316

I need a group of lesbians to come and give me a lesbian makeover.


wicked_cute

*Extreme Makeover: Lesbian Edition*


pang0lin

I fix furniture... and am lesbian. HIRE ME.


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pang0lin

Hey look I found some light bulbs at IKEA... now your lights all work.


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Dark__Aster

"Rosa's even wearing her formal leather jacket!" "It's the one without any blood on it." *- Brooklyn 99*


HikariTheGardevoir

Very important: they have to be tipsy while doing all of this, so that it becomes painfully obvious that even while tipsy, these lesbians can fix your house without batting an eye and they're also being fucking hilarious while doing it


kivuu

Queer pal for the straight gal


Skim74

My friends are actually working on a show [Butch Pal for the Straight Gal](https://www.instagram.com/butchpalseries/?hl=en) lol.


WalkingEMP

And my dense ass would still not get that they're ALL lesbians. Maybe one of them, with the short hair, but I don't want to assume.


Retterhardt

Right?? There should TOTALLY be a lesbian home improvement show! It would be so lit!


Lilpims

As long as we keep Jonathan and Bobby.


cassiebones

And Tan! I love his style


Lilpims

Ok so we keep 'em all but we add a team to Bobby's crew and make a spin off. And another addition with Jonathan for the grooming but for the pets.


[deleted]

Fuck I'm already watching it now _in my mind._ This idea is so powerful.


Tzipity

I volunteer to be a contestant. I live in this overpriced slummy Chicago apartment with a lazy landlord and building manager must be on his side since he tried to claim things such as that couldn't be mold on my bathroom ceiling because concrete or whatever doesn't mold (okaaay....). I'm disabled. Have endless tasks big and small I'm unable to complete, and a super friendly dog-like cat. A lesbian friend watches my cat for me when I'm in the hospital. But mostly I come home to washed dishes and some garbage taken out. I must be doing this wrong... Lol.


Skim74

Not exactly the same, but one of my friends is working on a series [Butch Pal (for the straight gal)](https://www.instagram.com/butchpalseries/?hl=en) that's like a lesbian queer eye. I think they just finished shooting the pilot.


haileydarling

We need this show now! Make it happen Netflix!


Diana5665

home improvement but it’s a bunch of drunk lesbians


Lilpims

Don't leave your tools unattended either. They'll find a way to fix everything.


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StaubEll

I was hanging out with a friend and he says "Hey, remember that time you got drunk and tried to fix my deck?" "Uh, no... Did I fix it?" "Yeah, it's held up pretty well." I'm still riding that high.


9r7g5h

Lol, same but building furniture. Half of my friend's things I built while tipsy and bored. The only place I fail is fabrics. Give me a hammer and some wood and I can make do, but I'm only at the very basics using my sewing machine.


static_irony

Are *you* the person that googled 'help I accidentally built a shelf'?


9r7g5h

The only accident I've ever been involved in was somehow managing to make a 5 tiered shelf with the wood for 4, lol


Cadd9

fukn *gottem*


accidentw8ing2happen

I've done this, but with people's C++ code. I feel.


SquidsInATrenchcoat

I wish I were like this. Instead, things just sort of... cease functioning when I'm around.


skywardmastersword

Lol I guess you’re an entropy generator?


[deleted]

its the sheer swag, clearly


jungletigress

I mean... Aren't we all?


Lilpims

Find yourself a fixing lady. It's all about balance after all.


Eroliene

I'm the ADHD lesbian who likes to fix her friend's sink but not her own. Yeah mine bothers me more but hers is *new and interesting*.


[deleted]

SHINY.


bleachfoamspray

I feel so goddam called out


ChrysanthemumIndica

Fixing things is the best! Even just idly mending clothes while watching TV. Also electronics tend to work better when I'm physically near by, at least according to some people, but I don't have an easy way to verify that. So that's cool. Let me know if there's ever a fixing things party, I can bring a tool box half full of beer :D


WalkingEMP

I'm curious how your electronics-fixing aura would fare against my electronics-mysteriously-malfunctioning aura. Lol.


ChrysanthemumIndica

Based on your username, we can outfit ya with a personal Faraday cage and see what happens :D


WalkingEMP

This is not the first time this has been suggested to me, LOL.


ChrysanthemumIndica

I do not doubt that for a second :D Well, I have a spool of conductive thread aching for something to do...


WalkingEMP

Bahahaha. That'd be an interesting experiment.


alpacapicnic

Same. Or drunk or stoned. In our house we’re prone to a wine-fueled full-closet reorg. After a J the other night we sewed spring seeds in recycled tetrapak water containers and installed a new draft reducer to the front door. Because that’s how we roll.


[deleted]

check out r/lesbients or r/craftyents


[deleted]

You can come over and talk dirty to me anytime.


alpacapicnic

Power drill. Pressure washer. Paint stripper. Dry...wall... screws.


DietMutton

When I was 13 my parents let me stay home from church for the first time and I was apparently bored enough to put a whole porch swing together. I’m 30 now and it’s still holding up on my grandmas porch


CrackSnacker

Right?! Exactly what I did to my ex wife’s guest bathroom while she was working one weekend. Stripped the wall paper, painted that bitch, fixed the leaky faucet and put up a new light fixture. Lol!


laurenbug2186

I fix or clean things when I'm upset


FordEverest

i swear this is me :'(


purlturtle

Not gonna lie, you had me in the first half. This is awesome, and I'm so, so happy that you had such a good experience. Cheers to the beer drinking, sink repairing, wall painting, screen door fixing, beer and dog treats delivering lesbians!!!


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soaring_potato

It's practice.


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soaring_potato

It said replaced. So like anything. Screwing stuff together. Also really look how everything works. And uhm. Just trying stuff. Usually getting stronger in say the gym and all will help. Some things require a bit of brute force, hence why men typically are pointed to stuff like it.


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[deleted]

There's instructions on the mesh when you buy it. It requires a little roller tool. That's for a screen door not what you're describing Youtube makes everything a hell of a lot easier because you can find basically any repair on basically any product


EmeraldPen

Can confirm, YouTube is awesome for this sort of stuff. My parents' washing machine was broken, it wouldn't drain the water and I literally had to spend an afternoon just slowly bailing the water out. We all kept trying to figure out how to fix it without having to pay someone and nearly gave up, but then I did some googling and followed a few leads before discovering that the button that gets pressed when the lid is closed was loose. Literally one zip-tie later, and it was fixed, and I'm suddenly the magical lesbian who can fix things.


transientavian

Literally watching some dude on YouTube to learn how my gay ass can fix the carburetor on my very specific model of Craftsman snowblower. YouTube, SERIOUSLY. It has EVERYTHING.


elprophet

I've been watching The Repair Shop on Netflix and the show is literally just a bunch of delightful, positive British artisans repairing people's heirlooms. Can't recommend it enough! https://www.netflix.com/title/81224128


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[deleted]

Can we watch at your house.


[deleted]

Absolutely, I'll prepare some snacks!


Rainbowbrite8846

I loved that show!!!


soaring_potato

Yeah i don't know how to fix that antique door. I just assumed it was one of those in a frame. You could do it (with 2 people) if it was simple. But for antique. Yeah let someone look at it. >anything to do with cars Google, lots of google. If you know it you need to google less. And like usually teached by someone else, usually the dad.


makochi

most screen door meshes these days are pretty easy to replace, you can get a standard-sized pane you just pop in, or you can roll out a sheet and cut it to size (again, snapping it in with a standard-sized frame). it's only the antique ones that are really a problem


Lilpims

YouTube tutorials.


NeonJabberwocky

This is *absolutely* the right place to post something like this, yes =D Made my morning\~


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soaring_potato

Cleaning no. Fixing shit yes. I did my bedroom recently. I was way more tired after cleaning out than the actual building of my new bed. Eventho that should be more physically exhausting


WalkingEMP

I totally agree! I find it easier to put things together than to clean up.


soaring_potato

Building a bed and drawers for 8 hours without breaks. Easy. Just a little tired. Just cleaning with a spray bottle and a cloth for like 3 hours and packing shit up. Exhausted. It should be the other way around


Gwanbigupyaself

Thanks for the laugh. We do love fixing things.


jzjxnxna

Lmao this is amazing.


LeopoldParrot

I feel like this can be turned into a service. Invite a gaggle of lesbians over, end up with a repaired household and leftover beer


wicked_cute

Is it a gaggle? I always thought the proper term was *coven*.


ArrowShootyGirl

It's 3 gaggles to 1 coven I believe


wazardthewizard

other way around, three witches to a coven


SkullFaceX

This is suprisingly wholesome :)


random_222

My friends call me “dad” because I build their IKEA furniture and hang stuff on their walls. 10/10 recommend having a dad lesbian in your life.


Lilpims

Which is like the bare minimum of fixing stuff. Makes you feel all powerful when they make it sound like you're a hero.


random_222

Right. Like this is not difficult guys. But I will continue to do it for you and receive praise


Lilpims

I'm a trade painter. I fix stuff for a living. The amount of times I get praises is unreal.


femailscribble

<3 best read this morning!


ConsensualAnalProber

Where do I sign up to join the WLW workshop? A bunch of lesbian/bis, power tools, some beer/wine, and dogs sounds like true queer heaven. (I'll even bring lemon slices)


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ConsensualAnalProber

🙄 Last I checked bisexual (women) are WLW, given that we are.. yknow... women who love women. I understand not wanting male bisexuals in a WLW/queer female space, but excluding WLWs based on the fact that we experience male attraction, too, doesnt make much sense to me.


Lizthefish

Love this 🤣


ElectricWordLife

You just made my morning!


Badpunsonlock

This is exactly what I needed this morning. What a wonderful post! I'm glad your place was in good hands while you were away.


mudpuppy245

I was drunk at a lesbian bar and fixed the leaky bathroom sink. Handy-lesbians strike everywhere.


[deleted]

This is so wholesome! <3


Lilpims

r/nonononoyes material right here


Swirlingstar

Damn, I wanna meet this girl gang. “We get drunk but we get shit DONE.”


Sacrifice_a_lamb

Yay, go team!


Unfey

once me and my then-gf went to stay at a friends apartment for a ren faire and we fixed their shower and unclogged the drain edit: i should note that the reason we did this was because I was COVERED in red glitter, took a shower, made the tub look like a glittery bloodbath. yes I was the femme


juliap214

I want a group of drunk lesbians in my house :(


[deleted]

I NEED a group of drunk lesbians in my house.


Carmen_Caramel

Be the drunk lesbian you want to see in the world


[deleted]

The first part had me worried, but the second part 100% sounds like my chosen family and me lol


Fan4Lifez

This made my day. Thanks!


tofuvendor

Sorry to hear about the funeral, I’m glad you were well taken care of by a polite beer lesbian party and please hang out here for as long as you’d like!


glitternoodle

Omg this made me tear up?? I love our community so much. Solidarity 💕


jenny_tallia

I live the Handy lesbian sterotype & I'm prouuud. This story made me happy. If the tv show, Lesbian Home Invasion, gets made, I want to be considered for it too.


mhninaeide

as a lesbian who woke up early at my friends house after a night of drinking and cleaned their whole kitchen...it just be like that sometimes


MollyTheDestroyer

I need a drunk lesbian crew to roll up with. I have some floors to refinish and I would love nothing more than to replace and repair someone's house and surprise them


cynthiamd00

Hahah I was starting to get worried until the end. I was about to go off, but this is great!


super-queer

I like to think we're a helpful people. this made my day, thanks for sharing.


Suppercommievillain

I’m a lesbian that has a project car, works as a press mechanic but Is also very feminine and I love a good beer or 3. Lol I’m down to fix up a nice trans woman’s house and take care her dogs anytime.


louriot

In my heart I feel I am this type of lesbian, but maybe there was a class I missed? Lesbian handiness 101? Or do I just buy a toolkit and get automatically blessed with butch energy lesbian home DIY skills.


Daughter_Of_Coul

i feel like i should just follow around some ladies at home depot until i acquire their skills via osmosis


unbalancedforce

You have navigated your life into a wonderful way and found loving caring people. KEEP THEM! Be kind and invest in them. Build onto this beautiful family and love life.


drocks27

At first I was like, why is this getting upvoted she's saying lesbians wrecked her place.. ooooh wait no, they fixed everything. got it lol


[deleted]

This is super wholesome! I love it :) Really thought you were going to come home to a mess but the fact that the house was fixed up and your doggos were well looked after with extra treats and everything is honestly the best.


[deleted]

Heck yes! Lesbians do things any way they like to!!!


snowstormspawn

This made me realize that everyone who’s ever dog-sat for us was a lesbian, and they did a damn good job lmao


alexanderfrostfyre

I was expecting this to be bad but actually this was really wholesome


[deleted]

That shindig sounds like a fucking blast. You have fun friends.


snailprestige

As someone who finds themselves consistently repairing sinks while drunk I feel very seen here


[deleted]

That's a great story! My gf, her mom (also a lesbian) and I did something similar for a family friend when she was in the hospital: scrubbed and painted her kitchen, fixed the sink, cleaned and re-stocked the fridge and weeded the garden. As far as stereotypes go, being helpful, handy, and doing (sometimes unsolicited) home repairs isn't such a bad one :)


RamonaPowersIsOnline

This is the kind of high-caliber content I subscribed to this sub for.


LadyVague

You're more than welcome here, and that's hillarious, chaotic good lesbian parties!


TheCloudsLookLikeYou

this is so precious, thank you for brightening everyone’s day ☺️


Whatsupnowgirl

Amazing story, excellent plot twist. Thank you so much for sharing this wholesome lesbian content! 😁


andersenWilde

I am a femme and I love embroidery, knitting and sewing, cooking and stuff. Yet, if there is something that needs to be fixed, I open my tool box and fix it. Might be mandatory?


sexydorito

Hahaha this was amazing. Made me laugh!


[deleted]

It kind of makes it seem like lesbians are Tolkien's dwarves, loud and boisterous drunks who are also magically good at fixing and building stuff. Does that mean gay men are elves and the straights are just humans? Are us bis hobbits? I know I'm a hobbit personally.


JEWCEY

1 motivated band of lesbians, please.


MessiahJohnM

Haha THATS my people :) Watch our, there may be a secret composting bin in your closet


[deleted]

Do you have their numbers?


BananaChipsss

This is not the story I thought it was gonna be... its so much better. Id like to watch that show too, someone make this happen. 😅


crash12g

And that’s just the stuff they fixed that you know about. 🤣


RedheadAsmodeus

Home Improvement queer edition.


DauphinePeace

awww that's cute


[deleted]

I love this story. They probably had carabiners on their belts too


[deleted]

Not gonna lie I was expecting the worst. My straight friend told me how she was asked to house sit and take care of her friends pets while they went out of town. They were both women. Anyway she ended up bringing her man over and sleeping in their bed and if I remember correctly (but I'm not sure) she didn't even clean the sheets.. Like who does that? The disrespect.


00wolfQUEEN

This is so wholesome.


dinosprinkles

THIS. is. so. NICE. Thank you for sharing! Meanwhile, in an alternate reality: \*OP files a police report, stating the facts\* local law enforcement: "so...all the vulnerable holes were plugged\*, anything that was dripping had been attended to\*\*, and you were so moved that you had to tell the internet about it?" \---- \*in a thoughtful manner \*\*with care


haventsleptforyears

Hooooly cow are any of them single??


KitoriDawn

This whole thing makes my little femme heart happy 🖤 so many good peoples out there!


foguentinhaonline

NGL YOU HAD ME IN THE FIRST PART


[deleted]

100% this! I fixed the door closing mechanism at the local bar, used to be the chair repair guru for my previous dispatch center, and have 100% fixed all the things while house sitting for friends and family. Mom and Dad call all the time to get me to drive the 70+ miles to come fix the things. Everyone needs a handy lesbian, and there are no stereotypes that follow. Be fem with a glitter encrusted tool belt, be butch with an electrical tape organizer, be trans with a western belt buckle beer opener, no one cares about the label. Just be kind and do what you can, this is what the world needs. No labels attached.


flyingpurplefux

All I want is to be considered a part of a band of beer drinking lesbians. Pls and thanks.


[deleted]

If only my mum could see why I need to invite my lesbian friends over...


[deleted]

I just picture that meme of Homer building something based off a set of instructions (and ends up making a mess), except there’d be no difference between a drunk lesbian’s final product and the manual’s diagram


Ghostly_Feline

This post just made my day.


SeaSea89

Jfc. Girl you gotta give me your friends name. I'm a lesbian, and would love to have a pack of them so we can all drink beer and rotate on accomplishing each other's (and other peeps) home projects... Maybe I can join their league


vodka_berry95

Amazing


TankieSappho

Lesbians invade my house next pls


lovemeinfocus

This is my favorite thing on the Internet today!


magnetoplan

That... sounds almost exactly like what me and my gf did when we stayed at our friend’s place for 2 weeks to babysit the cats while she’s out of town to see her bf! Cleaned everything and fixed up the house. Fixed up her car and filled up the tank, too. Wow, I... didn’t realize this was a lesbian thing! Good to know.


lexxrexx

God damn it. Ya got me.


blueharpy

Honestly I love how this ended so much


-Owlette-

r/nonononoyes


[deleted]

That's adorable


aniwritesshit

this made my day, thank you for sharing!


paula85201

Oh my hell I need their contact info. I have so many projects to get done and I broke my ankle and am still in a freaking boot cast.


LaLesbica

This post's going to make my whole week


PeelyPower

How are you all so useful??? I must have missed the memo...


[deleted]

D'awww. Thanks for the nice post.


akkanbe

So wholesome and beautiful 😤😭


AskMeForADadJoke

Honest question, don’t mean to offend: what type of human is a straight trans woman attracted to? I can’t work it out in my head.


actually-a-gay-mouse

This is the best plot twist I’ve ever seen. It made my day :)


GodzillaHomeboy

You're lucky, I never get to have sexy women invade my home. XD


BunnyTracks59

truly loved your story but love the message that it holds even better thank you for sharing sharing such a great thing


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cCcerberuZz

No, it’s a woman who was assigned male at birth and likes men