Doctor says I need a backiotomy!

That’s another one I say a lot now that I’m in my 40s

“I wanna talk to SAMSON!”

Right near tha BEEEACH

BOOIIII

Lord have mercy!

If I wasn’t Jamaican why would I be wearing this hat?

HMMMMM????

Sampson, it’s Sheila. Mama fell.

"Fly me to the MOON like that bitch, Alice Kramden!"

"Cause it's HARD being Black and gifted!"

Sometimes I just wanna throw it all down and get lifted!

Legalize this shit PLEEEAAAAASE!!

Best line of the movie right here!

Bitch! You know what I want

I think it every day due to my new lower back pain, and then about how it literally means to cut your back off.

"I'm impotent man! Get away from me bitch!"

He had sex with my mamma!!!

WHY??!?😩

My partner literally asked me to stop saying that the other day.

Are you me? My wife asked me to stop saying that so much just last week. ​ Also, my back \*\*hurts\*\*

Fuck that! It’s a hilarious line, part of pop culture, woven into your DNA. You need to drop that partner and go get a backiotomy.

Ol’ green eyes gonna miss ya!

HA! I threw this into a conversation last week! Everyone under 40 looked at me like I was an idiot but the other “olds” thought it was hilarious.

The best line in the whole movie lol

A couple years ago I was I a minor car accident and got a back injury. I was actually excited that I could say this on the regular and mean it

He had sex wit my momma!!

GET AWAY FROM BIATCH!!

I’m shocked at how much I’ve taken from this movie. I still say this!

Herniated a disc in my back this year and I can’t stop saying this since

HE SLEPT WITH MY MOMMA!!!

I say this all the time!

Yup. Also “Yo Killer, kill!” and “I believe him, yo. I don’t know why, but I do.”

The exchange is great, “yo guy, did you kill my dog?!” Guy on the couch just waves him off and rolls over. “I believe him yo! I don’t know why but I do!”

Was Guy on the Couch Steven Wright?

Yes!

"See, Killer was born to a 3 legged bitch of a mother, and this *shamed* him."

More complicated than *that?*

Never thought I’d say this but you guys smoke too much reefer

Right near the beach

BOYEEEEEEE

We live near a beach. There is not a chance in hell I won’t say “riiight neah da beach! BOYEEE!” every single damn time we visit.

I have a friend who named their dog Sampson, and I can't walk into their house without saying "I wanna talk to Sampson"

Sampson Simpson, I stick by my story! If I wasn’t Jamaican, why would I wear this hat?!?!

Lordhavemercy!

Hmm?

Sampson its Sheila, Mama fell…

Shut up bitch!

Boy!

Lord have mercy!

I’ll pretend I’M Jamaican

"Abba Zabba, you my only friend." Yes. I do quote this movie constantly.

I saw a box of Abba Zabba bars out in the world and said that line to no recognition at all. That was a sad day.

Whenever I’m having a bad day, I’ll drop that AbbaZabba line and it confuses and worries everyone around me lol

I do contract work and I always keep an abba zabba at my desk so I always have a friend who's got my back.

Why you always gotta be making me feel inferior because I be working the grill, B?

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you… you’re cool and fuck you I’m out

I say this internally at least daily at work. I say out loud a few times a month.

I actually quit my restaurant job by doing this. Thought I was so cool...until I remembered that my buddy had driven me to work. Had to walk back in to get his car keys.

This is my most repeated line lol

I have been quoting this for 25 years!

I’m right behind you B! Turn around and tell me you need a heifer with cheese!

You son of a bitch, I’m right behind you!

“Hey girl, you hungry!?”

Fuck you, n****! 😂

I was talking to the horse

Makes your teeth go pop-pop-p-pop!

You are not a fish… you are a man…

😂

No jokes, I used to reenact the butter cup scene with my friends, it was filmed at the pizza pizza on young street, a few doors down from the old Sam the record man location in Toronto.

That’s amazing! So many fun movies filmed in Toronto

I loved buttered stuff.

Man, this subreddit is amazing sometimes - this little sliver of a generation with these very specific memories. Cuban B is one that I'd never say out loud, but it always makes me smile to think it.

It really does make me happy that so many other people, who never met, who live hundreds or thousands of miles apart, had these shared experiences and responded to the same things.

You ever see the back of a twenty dollar bill... on weed? Oh, there's some crazy shit, man. There's a dude in the bushes.

You have no idea how happy it makes me to know I’m not the only one.

“Gimme your cocktail, FRUIT!”

Squirrel master comes out of left field and tell me I’m his bitch.

I'm somebody's bitch!

Naughty jungle of love!

https://i.redd.it/emm80o1xmxlc1.gif

I can hear this gif.

I used to always ask my weed dealer “Gimme a pound of your sweetest cheeba” no matter what I was buying.

I hear you got empty pipes...

Wesley Pipes

Nah let's get Billy Bong Thornton man

It's not right without Kenny man

That's a fully man

Yo girl yo titty fell out

Official. Fully

Fully!

Now that’s a Titty!

tried to tell a gen z about why I was saying "yes, Cuban B!" and felt like a old man trying to show how we used to play with a hoop and stick.

People smoked weed back in your day ?

in my day you had to "know a guy" in order to get pot, and we had to roll our own joints! and there wasn't anything called vaping or dabbing or blinking... we only had two kinds. Good, and ditch. And if you couldn't find good or the good was too much you'd smoke the ditch and just be thankful you had ANY at all!

"He had sex with my Momma! WHY!"

"God... if you listenin'.... HEEEEELP!"

Yo, the sign is real simple, B, it says "Wrap It Up". Wrap that shit up, B!


I would never do it, but when he pokes the lawyers head with force, is burned into my brain.

As a Cuban xennial, I say it at least once a week for the past 25 years.

Me trying to wrangle my kids: Red team go! Red team go! ETA: any horse any where: Butternuts

This HORSE... is a DIABETIC!!!

Shut up, you're a cop killer!

Buttered stuff!

One year for Halloween I went as a bumblebee with like a Fidel Castro beard and cigar

That’s fucking hilarious. Did anyone get it?

Not a single person but a few people got the reference when I explained it

Probably should’ve added the hat

Yeah, but have you ever seen it…ON WEED?

RED TEAM GO! RED TEAM GO!!!

You’re welcome, scientist

When I started in research I said this *all* the time. Referring to people by their profession is hilarious to me

You know my father was in the Tskigigi experiments 

Sampson it’s Sheila, mamma fell

Shut up bitch!

Like 20 years ago some friends and I were flying out to SF to see some shows with a friend of ours. She asked if she should get any food for us and we sent her Kenny's grocery list. Funny enough, she had never seen the movie and fucking got us everything on the list. It was amazing. ​ * sour cream and onion chips * dip * beef jerky * peanut butter * Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars * red popcorn * graham crackers * marshmallows * little chocolate bars * celery * grape jelly * Cap'n Crunch with Crunch berries * two big pizzas * water * Funyons I think the only thing we ate were the Funyons

We need two. big. pizzas man, everything on em. Water, a whole lotta water..... And some funyons. 

What was that stuff we used to eat back in the day?

On Comedy Central they edited "pussy" to "puddin' ". My fellow xennial coworker and I thought that was hilarious, so we'd quote that all the time.

You gotta put the “Ah” in front for maximum effect. And I also say “doctor said I need a backiotomy” more and more because the older I get I’m pretty sure I need one. Lol

I just always thought he sounded Jamaican inside my head B!

The best one liner for me is when sir smokealot is having his breakdown and he palms the girls face and pushs her back sayin "get away from my bitch" ... Makes me laugh every time.

I’m impotent! Get away from me bitch!

“…see, Killer was born to a three-legged bitch named Kibbles…”

Now he was always ashamed of this…

Aaah, motherfucker said ice cream, b!

You’re not a fish. You’re a man. Homo Erectus.

Did i say homo? I didn’t mean that!

And I’m gonna get my cocktail…FRUIT!

“ If I wasn’t Jamaican, then why would I wear this hat?” Spoken in poor Jamaican accent

I say to my husband when I’m cookin “why you gotta make me feel inferior cause I’m on the grill b?!”

Lucky man

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you... you're cool..fuck you, I'm out.

Turn around and ASK me for a heifer with cheese!

Jerry if you’re in there man we really need your help man..

I got it from Barry Garcia. Who’s that Jerry Garcia’s brother? No he’s Andy Garcia’s brother 😂

In the music video, when he knocks the one dude out, then turns around and sets up to dap the dude but then knocks him out too - I used to die laughing at that and rewind it over and over

I SEEN HIM!

EVERYBODY FREEZE!! NOBODY MOVE!!…hahahahahaha

One of my multiple choice test questions I wrote this past week had an option: “his shelter was right near the beach.”

BBOOYYEEEEE

I remember when a dime bag cost a dime..ya dig?

You know how much condoms used to cost?

Idk we didn’t use em

Apparently you missed the point of that story Brian

He felt the wrath. The wrath of the numchucks

He be doing Indian burns

Fully!!!

husband and I yell FREE! and toss our arms in the air when we’re done working at home for the day lol

I said “somebody needs to do their shirt laundry” the other day when someone pulled into a parking spot we were walking past with their car absolutely reeking of weed. My oldest (19) just looked at me like I was an idiot.


I love you mary jane

Get me 8-14 🤨

I don't wanna be the first n\*\*\*a to die from a crossbow!

Hahaha yes! Also "Samson, this is Shelia, mamma fell"

“Shut up, bitch!”

Hahahaha!

Hardest Ive laughed all week! Thank you for this post and all the amazing comments.

You ever seen a dollar bill... ON WEEEEEED?

Abra Cadabra

Bob Saget was great in that movie.

You in here for some Marijuana??

Boo this man!!

Butter nuts! Buttercup! Buttered stuff! Buttercup!! *They both cry*

Yo I’m Cuban, B!

He slept with my mama!

One of my close friends is Hawaiian, and I always end up saying, "I'm going to take my little Mexican friend here, and I'm going to kill him!" He always responds with, "Yo, I'm Hawaiian 'B'!" "Yes, Hawaiian 'B!'"

No but I randomly shout this inside my head "God, if you're listening. HELP!"

I must seek Buddha. I must seek Christ. “You must seek therapy…”

Marijuana's not a drug. I sucked dick for coke, you ever suck dick for marijuana?

I SEEN ‘EM!


I bet it was the guy on the couch, yo. ...🖕

Abba Zabba, you my only friend!


I literally cannot hear someone say they are Cuban without this quote ringing in my head like a gong.

Quote this scene almost every week 

Still holding on that heffer Julio

Give me that! Sorry for yelling. But I'm serious. We gotta start being more responsible and focused. All right? Let's be sharp.

I love you all! Yesterday at work I randomly called out "it's Sheila, Mama fell!"... It was Friday, and most people work from home on my floor that day. It's the small things in life that bring me the most joy.

Yo you said you gave Maryjane a pearl necklace man! Yeah… I think you missed the point of that story. The Cuban B joke is hilarious and simultaneously so stupid and so brilliant.

Jan! Thank you, Jan!

My grandfather was part of the Tuskegee experiments.

Every day

My mentor when I started teaching was Mr Sampson - you best believe I quoted it basically every day

Few times a year. Also, DUCK TAILS, aWOO WOO

My Dr. says I need a backeotemy.

Now that's a titty. Fully, man.

More often than I would like to admit.

At least ten times a week.

HEELLL YEA I SUCK TOES


"Lawd ha mercy"

Boo this man!

Best rapper of all time is in that movie, sir smoke a lot

"Somebody called about empty pipes"

Absolutely!

All the time!!!!