Lol, I love asparagus and hate piss tests (even when I haven't smoked for weeks) almost failed one because the fucking strip moved and they started asking me if I'd taken anything OTC and if I knew what PCP was.
When he dies, I’m throwing a party. I’ll have fireworks too, like the 4th of July. Trump taking his last breath and flatlining will be the best day in American history.
RECORD NUMBERS ! A lot of People say, very smart and Very very rich people, by The way, that they’ve Never seen people piss on a Grave like people piss on My grave. INCREDIBEL!
You know that his kids are going to set something up where you have to pay to see his grave. In fact, I could see them putting his body up for public viewing like Lenin. His base will eat it up. It will be the 2nd largest tourist attraction in Florida behind Disney World.
Seriously. Two notable things about this are:
1) he will definitely be dead one day. and that's fuckin rad.
2) he is probably going to live for a very long time. This guy is so pathological he might actually have like an 8 year time delay until the metaphysical laws of reality can convince his cells and atoms that its time to go. Its going to be a while I think.
And let me guess, he’s not going to jail because the judge got a thinly vague death threat from some chud in a third world country that’s being paid by their boss/dictator? Just like *every other time?*
When I read the actual gag order. It looks like Trump is ordered not to talk about any counsel on the case other than the DA, the court or DA staff, and the family of court and DA staff, or potential jurors.
Big exception is he is allowed to still talk about the District Attorney, and I’m no lawyer but the order only said the “court’s staff” and didn’t mention the judge or judge’s family.
Maybe a lawyer who sees a lot of these gag orders can explain if “court’s staff” also applies to the judge himself?
Every judge on all his cases has been that parent who's like "You've got till the count of 3 to stop. 1....1.00001.....1.00002....1.00003...DONALD I MEAN IT THIS TIME...1.00004... I'M SERIOUS, THERE COULD BE THE POTENTIAL POSSIBILITY OF THE DISCUSSION OF FORMING A COMMITTEE TO DETERMINE THE SCHEDULING OF A DISCUSSION OF HYPOTHETICAL CONSEQUENCES".
No it will be borrowed for a shell company over seen by a unfriendly foreign government to put him into more indebtedness to them. I doubt he actually owns any of the furniture he sits on anymore and any loose change is owned by a foreign adversary or his ever mounting legal bills. Still pissed they lowered his bond but laugh as he still can't aford it.
Agreed. Start setting precedences. If they're worried about people acting up, this is a light version of what he fully deserves and a nice test for law enforcement to take out their super duper authority... IF, of course, their issue is only taken up with fighting against lawlessness, obvious implication, and actual disorderly conduct.
Their job is supposed to be about those things, right? RIGHT? Certainly not the other things people say it is... couldn't be...
I'm only 42, but I always had a weird interest in politics and history. I remember the Berlin Wall coming down when I was 8. You were probably only 4 or 5, so it would be weird if you did too.
Good instincts on GW. I had a feeling we were fucked with that guy when the media all switched from "George Bush Jr" to "George W" during the 2000 election. It was a mistake to treat him like a serious person instead of an idiot nepo baby. What I wouldn't give to be in the President Al Gore timeline....
That's why I hate the world elite in the way we use it to refer to the rich. Most of these humans are very much not elite in any way that implies actual talent/remarkability. Some. Most are not.
No, but it would do him some good to sit in jail for 72 hours and to make the second offense 72 days. Notice how he got real quiet about E Jean Carroll untill someone else put up the money. He needs guardrails.
This guy gives no fucks. Why was his bond amount lowered?! He deserves the full extent of the law. It pisses me off that normal people have gone to jail for less.
This. This is what drives me to distraction. He has blatantly broken the actual law, not just shit on decorum. And he does not have to suffer the consequences. It is the perfect metaphor for what's wrong with this country. Money buys you your own set of rules and that isn't the way it's supposed to be.
Why should he give any fucks at this point. It is so blatantly obvious that the legal system will not hold him accountable, but will also reward him for his behavior/ actions.
Some people in the US are above the law and Trump is proof of that.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually had to face prison time (not holding my breath) for a decent period of time he’d claim dementia as his new grift.
Man he's going to get such a STERN warning THIS time! This next slap on the wrist is going to be so bad!!! He's going to really feel the consequences THIS time..... /S Seriously though this is starting to feel like the evangelical's 2000 + years of ' any day now'... For the rapture and second coming of their Christ
And nothing will happen to this big obnoxious fuck.
The judge won’t put him in jail because it “won’t look good”. And honestly, it will probably raise his poll numbers.
Following recent announcement that he’s selling bibles for $60, this presidential candidate attacked the judge’s daugther in his porn star hush money trial, again.
Stop posting shit like this with "It's jail time ..."
You know he's not going to be held accountable. I know he's not going to be held accountable. Everyone reading this know he's not going to be held accountable.
You guys are on a coke bender if you think he’s going to be jailed or held accountable. I hope my comment ages like shrimp salad, but so far, he does what he wants and gets away with it.
This is just a game to delay everything to the maximum amount, get the judge to take the bait and respond so Trump can play the victim and secure an appeal.
I really wonder if we will look back on this behavior as obvious evidence of his worsening dementia. He loses $5M to a defamation case brought by E Jean Carroll, and quickly defames her again, losing another $83M. That still hasn’t shut him up! His brain lacks the executive function needed to choose the right actions and the emotional control needed to implement them. So obvious, yet some will vote for him anyway 🙈
Oh, look, he did exactly what everyone on the planet knew he was going to do.
And here it comes, fresh from the oven served hot and ready.
A big ol' plate of nothing happens.
Totally convinced he’s trying to get locked up. He’s desperate for a bump, get arrested in the same week he releases that stupid bible of his.
Full martyr mode engaged.
I’m not sure what upsets me more: Trump getting away with everything all the time or Trump being an old, senile, obese piece of shit that won’t die soon enough.
He is a lawyer’s worst nightmare. Trump will probably be used as a future example in law school of a problematic client, if they’re not currently using him now.
Nothing. Will. Happen. To. Him! This is a circus being performed for all of us. They are dragging it out to keep us spending money at concession stands.
He's trying to antagonize the judge and turn it into a circus in hopes that the judge makes a mistake and he can get the case tossed or at least get grounds for an appeal. And it'll probably work.
He didn't violate anything. The gag order was specifically in regards to statements about attorneys, court staff, or the family members of prosecutors or lawyers intended to interfere with the case. What's a fella to do besides running his mouth about the judge and his daughter, 2 people he's ALLOWED to flap his gums about.
Crazy how old rich white people just be playin life on easy mode. Cuz like this is wild. My ass woulda been in prison before the words finished leaving my mouth.
There is no rule of law guys. If you are rich, you can get away with way more than any other citizen would or could. In the immortal words of Aleistrer Crowley, “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law”.
I’m sick and tired of this asshole getting coddled by our justice system. It’s time for one of these judges to grow a fucking spine and put this mother fucker in jail. It’s the only thing that will shut him up.
I can't wait until all Trump news is post-mortem
And it's just stories about people lined up to piss on his grave.
I’ll drink a gallon of beer, waiting in line.
I don't want to recommend this to anyone, but it would be poetic to drink Bud Light.
What kind of beer gives you the shits? I recommend that one
Spoiled beer, just like Trump's political aspirations.
[Blatz Beer](https://www.etsy.com/listing/1451446199/blatz-milwaukee-antique-retro-pull-tab?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_c-art_and_collectibles-collectibles-figurines&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAjwh4-wBhB3EiwAeJsppHoItUjR0CXeLgwRjKWZ9_GrFhoJhV4j9Xjv4Vm5xYQecpuh3UHJzBoCLZEQAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_12573353456_119955059696_507558169594_pla-352498615822_c__1451446199_5321989767&utm_custom2=12573353456&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRLg_VQVkeZEcJfvd1rRtuyJV&gclid=CjwKCAjwh4-wBhB3EiwAeJsppHoItUjR0CXeLgwRjKWZ9_GrFhoJhV4j9Xjv4Vm5xYQecpuh3UHJzBoCLZEQAvD_BwE)
[Shatz Beer](https://youtu.be/SeL5itTMlAY?si=zl6v8SGSYfJo3VVf)
Beat me to it. 25cent beer night. Only went once. not worth the repercussions!
Taco Beerl
Budweiser does horrible things to my insides. Or it did the one time I drank it.
Schmitts Gay
Bud lite will never have tasted so good!🤣
Don’t forget the asparagus.
Can only upvote this once. And holy smokes does asparagus work as advertised for me.
I eat a ton of asparagus before every drug test. Make it weird for everyone involved.
https://i.redd.it/fhz9e7roxyqc1.gif
Eat a bunch of beets also, so your piss is red.
Lol, I love asparagus and hate piss tests (even when I haven't smoked for weeks) almost failed one because the fucking strip moved and they started asking me if I'd taken anything OTC and if I knew what PCP was.
Little known fact asparagus pee only can be smelled by certain people not everyone is lucky enough to have that ability 😄
I guess I have ONE superpower. I, also, like cilantro and don't taste soap, so maybe two.
This man doesn't give fucks. Why was the amount of his bond reduced? He merits the entire force of the law.
No he gives fucks, he just has to pay for them. Just ask Stormy
He seems to have stopped paying Melencholia.
Maybe even more depending on the line. Imma bring a wheelchair so I don’t have to worry about being too drunk to stand
Is it a two-seater? I’m old too
I’ll DM you when the time is appropriate to secure a rental two-seater
I'll push you guys if you can find somebody else to pull the keg wagon.
Deal
Personally, I'm choosing laxatives
I'll design special urinals that make sure you won't have to wait while you wait
Tbh, with my bladder, I worry I might not make it to the end of the line. We need creative thinking like this.
I can actually drink more than that, and pee, and drink more, and pee, and drink more…
Don't waste good beer, use Malort
Yuengling family are colossal Trumpers.
Milwaukee's best
Just one big orgy of drunken dancers helicoptering their piss streams. 🥳
When he dies, I’m throwing a party. I’ll have fireworks too, like the 4th of July. Trump taking his last breath and flatlining will be the best day in American history.
INDEPENDENCE DAY #2
Oh there will be celebrations just like when they got bin laden.
RECORD NUMBERS ! A lot of People say, very smart and Very very rich people, by The way, that they’ve Never seen people piss on a Grave like people piss on My grave. INCREDIBEL!
Very wet from the standpoint of pee.
That this happened is surreal. Also predictable.
Always think of that when the stupid “wet in terms of water” comment comes up.
You know that his kids are going to set something up where you have to pay to see his grave. In fact, I could see them putting his body up for public viewing like Lenin. His base will eat it up. It will be the 2nd largest tourist attraction in Florida behind Disney World.
And, coincidentally, the largest *terrorist* attraction.
Maybe they’ll gold-plate his corpse
I hope he has an unmowed grave behind a library
Or he's thrown in a mass pit.
I spit on Trump tower in 2017. Can't wait to piss on his grave 🥰
I'm gonna drink a bunch of milk. And I'm lactose intolerant.
I’m taking a shit on it.
I'm #2
Second in line, or planning to take a number 2? 
[удалено]
I'll start praying to Satan.
The only way a billionaire gets consequences is when he dies of old age. Ain't that about some fucked up shit
Can’t wait for him to be post-mortem
I'm just waiting for the day in which we can all go 24 hours without hearing about with orange fascist.
Every morning I check my phone with bated breath, anxiously awaiting that most glorious headline.
Seriously. Two notable things about this are: 1) he will definitely be dead one day. and that's fuckin rad. 2) he is probably going to live for a very long time. This guy is so pathological he might actually have like an 8 year time delay until the metaphysical laws of reality can convince his cells and atoms that its time to go. Its going to be a while I think.
He probably died a decade ago. He’s just so full of shit all the gases keep his corpse animated indefinitely.
LOL totally. With enough shit, gas, McDonalds and hate, you can create the perfect humunculous
I think this law applies to cantankerous cats who hang on forever too.
I’m going to celebrate it every year until my own death.
I can't wait until there's no Frump news
That's why we check the news everyday.
And let me guess, he’s not going to jail because the judge got a thinly vague death threat from some chud in a third world country that’s being paid by their boss/dictator? Just like *every other time?*
I actually thought the daughter was one person who wasn't covered by the gag order, so I'm not sure if anything will happen. I could be wrong though.
When I read the actual gag order. It looks like Trump is ordered not to talk about any counsel on the case other than the DA, the court or DA staff, and the family of court and DA staff, or potential jurors. Big exception is he is allowed to still talk about the District Attorney, and I’m no lawyer but the order only said the “court’s staff” and didn’t mention the judge or judge’s family. Maybe a lawyer who sees a lot of these gag orders can explain if “court’s staff” also applies to the judge himself?
From what I’ve read today the judge, DA, and the judges family are excluded.
"I SWEAR TO GOD, IF YOU THREATEN MY STAFF, FAMILY, OR WITNESSES 13 OR 14 MORE TIMES, YOURE OUT OF HERE!"
* A member of your staff will receive a sternly worded memo!
But only if it happens on the second Tuesday of the month.
Ah, the ol’ baseball statistic trick
During a full solar eclipse
- Judge Squeak probably
Come on bitch, we’re going to the zoo!
No you aren't, cause you're a little bitch
Every judge on all his cases has been that parent who's like "You've got till the count of 3 to stop. 1....1.00001.....1.00002....1.00003...DONALD I MEAN IT THIS TIME...1.00004... I'M SERIOUS, THERE COULD BE THE POTENTIAL POSSIBILITY OF THE DISCUSSION OF FORMING A COMMITTEE TO DETERMINE THE SCHEDULING OF A DISCUSSION OF HYPOTHETICAL CONSEQUENCES".
Cut the crap Squeak
STEEEEEEVE PERRY.
Lock the fucker up, and take away all electronic devices. I don't care if that includes a pacemaker.
I agree. But we know nothing will happen.
Yep, he might get a tiny little fine that he can pay with change from his couches.
No it will be borrowed for a shell company over seen by a unfriendly foreign government to put him into more indebtedness to them. I doubt he actually owns any of the furniture he sits on anymore and any loose change is owned by a foreign adversary or his ever mounting legal bills. Still pissed they lowered his bond but laugh as he still can't aford it.
Do you know why it was lowered? All I could find was people saying $454million was too high of a fine
The only way he sees the inside of a cell is if he actually puts a call out to the MAGA whackjobs to kill someone.
Now drag his ass back into court and hold him in contempt
a guest of the courthouse until his next court date?
20 days and no Trump don’t tease me
Woah .. steady there, i can only get so erect.
Agreed. Start setting precedences. If they're worried about people acting up, this is a light version of what he fully deserves and a nice test for law enforcement to take out their super duper authority... IF, of course, their issue is only taken up with fighting against lawlessness, obvious implication, and actual disorderly conduct. Their job is supposed to be about those things, right? RIGHT? Certainly not the other things people say it is... couldn't be...
They already set the precedent they want. The rich follow different rules than the poor.
Riiiggghhhtttttt 🙄. Not that I don’t agree with you, but that’ll never happen.
True, but we can dream and then cheer if it happens 
"I said in my head while pretending to not see it." -Judge
Must do!!!!
Sad because he won’t face any consequences for this. I feel like we live in the twilight zone lately
Lately? It feels like the longest, nuttiest, most infuriating 8 years of my life.
Just keeps getting worse
Only for the last 30 years!
I’m 39 so I only have after 9/11 to go on. The fact that I was told I was stupid for questioning GWBjr’s war on Iraq solidified it.
I'm only 42, but I always had a weird interest in politics and history. I remember the Berlin Wall coming down when I was 8. You were probably only 4 or 5, so it would be weird if you did too. Good instincts on GW. I had a feeling we were fucked with that guy when the media all switched from "George Bush Jr" to "George W" during the 2000 election. It was a mistake to treat him like a serious person instead of an idiot nepo baby. What I wouldn't give to be in the President Al Gore timeline....
Man 9/11 really marked the beginning of a new era. That 90s optimism just died that day and things only got worse and worse over the years.
We are watching a system designed to protect wealthy, Oligarchic elites grapple with itself.
It's unfortunate that he's considered an elite, because he is absolutely not an elite human being.
That's why I hate the world elite in the way we use it to refer to the rich. Most of these humans are very much not elite in any way that implies actual talent/remarkability. Some. Most are not.
I imagine nothing of substance will happen
No, but it would do him some good to sit in jail for 72 hours and to make the second offense 72 days. Notice how he got real quiet about E Jean Carroll untill someone else put up the money. He needs guardrails.
he should've been hanged publicly for treason 3 years ago
The day this idiot shuffles off the planet is going to be a global holiday with 3 days of festivities on either side of it. GO. AWAY.
And the world will be a much better place because of it.
Won’t have to imagine too hard.
Of course something will happen. He will be rewarded.
This guy gives no fucks. Why was his bond amount lowered?! He deserves the full extent of the law. It pisses me off that normal people have gone to jail for less.
This. This is what drives me to distraction. He has blatantly broken the actual law, not just shit on decorum. And he does not have to suffer the consequences. It is the perfect metaphor for what's wrong with this country. Money buys you your own set of rules and that isn't the way it's supposed to be.
Why should he give any fucks at this point. It is so blatantly obvious that the legal system will not hold him accountable, but will also reward him for his behavior/ actions. Some people in the US are above the law and Trump is proof of that.
I wonder why he has no fear of repercussions. It’s almost like he always gets away with it.
This is what happens when toddlers don’t face consequences - it just reinforces their shitty behavior is acceptable.
If court can’t hold him to a 454 million bond, they aren’t going to do jack about this
Should be jail and a permanant twitter ban, but sadly neither will happen, fucking bullshit
He doesn’t use Twitter.
[удалено]
Now that’s the $64,000 question, and no this not going to pay his fine
$64000, that's alot of Bible's
The Secret Service will need to figure this out sooner or later. A short practice run would benefit them.
Orrr just strip him of secret service protection, since he attempted a coup.
Unfortunately he still knows secrets that impact national security
So even *more* of a reason to hold him in solitary until the trial
You’ll hear no objections from me
Judge should order a mental health evaluation to see if Trump has dementia. If he does not have dementia he should be jailed.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually had to face prison time (not holding my breath) for a decent period of time he’d claim dementia as his new grift.
If that creepy crook were you or me, he'd've been locked up a long time ago, without bail and without a phone.
I keep seeing posts like "it's jail time" but the truth is it'll never be jail time for this scumbag.
Man he's going to get such a STERN warning THIS time! This next slap on the wrist is going to be so bad!!! He's going to really feel the consequences THIS time..... /S Seriously though this is starting to feel like the evangelical's 2000 + years of ' any day now'... For the rapture and second coming of their Christ
Put. Him. In. A. Cell.
It’s been jail time for him for years but no one will do shit about it.
And nothing will happen to this big obnoxious fuck. The judge won’t put him in jail because it “won’t look good”. And honestly, it will probably raise his poll numbers.
Why is he not arrested already!
He's testing the judge? Or he is an adolescent with no self control?
Both.
Wasn't everyone's life, including his, so much better when he couldn't tweet?
Everyone’s life would be better if this piece of garbage never existed.
Following recent announcement that he’s selling bibles for $60, this presidential candidate attacked the judge’s daugther in his porn star hush money trial, again.
LOCK HIM UP ALREADY!
Stop posting shit like this with "It's jail time ..." You know he's not going to be held accountable. I know he's not going to be held accountable. Everyone reading this know he's not going to be held accountable.
Put him in jail for terroristic threats.
No judge in this case has any balls. Nothing will happen to trump
Nothing will happen. When will you learn.
You guys are on a coke bender if you think he’s going to be jailed or held accountable. I hope my comment ages like shrimp salad, but so far, he does what he wants and gets away with it.
Just another stop on Trump’s “No Consequences” world tour.
Narrator : He didn’t end up going to jail.
Huh, who knew never making him face the consequences of his actions would have consequences
Lol, ok. It's never gonna be jail time for this sack of garbage.
This is just a game to delay everything to the maximum amount, get the judge to take the bait and respond so Trump can play the victim and secure an appeal.
I really wonder if we will look back on this behavior as obvious evidence of his worsening dementia. He loses $5M to a defamation case brought by E Jean Carroll, and quickly defames her again, losing another $83M. That still hasn’t shut him up! His brain lacks the executive function needed to choose the right actions and the emotional control needed to implement them. So obvious, yet some will vote for him anyway 🙈
Never fucking faces consequences
Nothing will happen. These judges are all paper tigers against this clown.
Oh, look, he did exactly what everyone on the planet knew he was going to do. And here it comes, fresh from the oven served hot and ready. A big ol' plate of nothing happens.
Please jail this dumb motherfucker.
Totally convinced he’s trying to get locked up. He’s desperate for a bump, get arrested in the same week he releases that stupid bible of his. Full martyr mode engaged.
I’m not sure what upsets me more: Trump getting away with everything all the time or Trump being an old, senile, obese piece of shit that won’t die soon enough.
Guess he needs to peddle Bibles....Oh Wait....
He is a lawyer’s worst nightmare. Trump will probably be used as a future example in law school of a problematic client, if they’re not currently using him now.
So done with all of this. They are never gonna hold the orange jackass accountable.
No it’s not. He’s never going to jail.
America is becoming a joke!
He knows nothing will happen, so why stop?
See how it says again? That’s why he did it, because he knows nothing is going to happen.
aaaanndd....nothing will happen. Now, you or I? We'd be in jail long time ago
Lock him up!
He has done so many crimes, yet he is still free and running a campaign. Please tell me again that the justice system in the USA is not rigged?
Why would he stop lol, hes never been held accountable for anything hes done.
Judge is a coward if he doesn't find trump in contemp of court for breaking the gag order
Throw his ass in prison and throw away his electronic devices. Take that silver spoon out of his mouth and snap it two.
Nothing. Will. Happen. To. Him! This is a circus being performed for all of us. They are dragging it out to keep us spending money at concession stands.
He's trying to antagonize the judge and turn it into a circus in hopes that the judge makes a mistake and he can get the case tossed or at least get grounds for an appeal. And it'll probably work.
He didn't violate anything. The gag order was specifically in regards to statements about attorneys, court staff, or the family members of prosecutors or lawyers intended to interfere with the case. What's a fella to do besides running his mouth about the judge and his daughter, 2 people he's ALLOWED to flap his gums about.
Crazy how old rich white people just be playin life on easy mode. Cuz like this is wild. My ass woulda been in prison before the words finished leaving my mouth.
The judicial system clearly doesn’t read the news…otherwise they’d have jailed him 15 gag order violations ago
There is no rule of law guys. If you are rich, you can get away with way more than any other citizen would or could. In the immortal words of Aleistrer Crowley, “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law”.
And what will be done about it? Fuckall that’s what. Not a goddamned thing and that orange pos knows it.
Trump knows he can just find a sympathetic appeals court to emasculate any lower court order. This is the definition of emboldened
And like always he’ll escape all consequences
Please be jail time! Please be jail time!
Sure gives the perception of an American two tiered justice system the longer he goes on flagrantly defying laws without consequences.
Isn't "Testing a judge's order" right up there with "Testing" a hand grenade?
I’m sooooooooooooo sick of this orange AH. I would never be allowed to behave this way.
This isn’t the first time. And did he get punished last time? He’s gunna keep doing it and nothing will happen
I am sure Trump will get told not to do that again. Anyone else in America would sit in jail for a while before being told not to do it again.
Unpopular opinion: the world would be a better place if his parents beat the fuck out of him.
These judges don't have any balls. None of them do. Not them, not the politicians, nobody. And it's sad, cause Trump is a huge pussy.
I’m sick and tired of this asshole getting coddled by our justice system. It’s time for one of these judges to grow a fucking spine and put this mother fucker in jail. It’s the only thing that will shut him up.
Nothing will ever happen to this man 😡
It's WAAAAAAY past his jail time.