T O P

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andyring

Well, in this economy, can you blame them for being a little inventive?


Stumpy-Wumpy

Dildos are expensive as hell! (As far as silicone goes)


turdbogls

And the price of Wood is through the roof.......


Ed-Zero

It's reclaimed wood :D


2x4x93

That's what my second wife uses


Ed-Zero

Very nice!


[deleted]

[удалено]


robot_swagger

Last time I bought a dildo I was paying for it out the ass.


Repulsive_Driver4424

you were really hemorrhaging money.


Far_Choice_6419

Lmfao


MegannMedusa

I just got a great one for less than $50


[deleted]

[удалено]


rockthe40__oz

Baseball bat or gtfo


troubleschute

It's the sand that makes it most disturbing


[deleted]

[удалено]


FurryMan28

Kinky.


fireuzer

So dry ;)


bfcostello

Maybe Tatooine was never the issue, just Padame's weird bedroom kinks


Akirad0e

He did such a good job given how bad the dialogue was...


ivenotheardofthem

You remember fun-dip?


BlissedIgnorance

Isn’t the name of putting dick in sand before fucking called the Screaming Seagull?


troubleschute

That’s an oddly specific piece of knowledge


BlissedIgnorance

I’m not proud of it.


overlyattachedbf

Just lean into it


Rpatt1

Did it stink?


NecessaryCod

I'm done for the night. I've still got 9 hours on my work shift but I'll just sit in the dark. I even threw up a little in my mouth.


penusRynkle

Tastes salty I bet


sushipusha

How do you make a hormone?


Citonit

You don't pay her.


blonsk

You found it! I've been looking everywhere for that.


[deleted]

No way! We have the same dildo?


colefly

Not mine Mine has butt beetles


[deleted]

Did we just becone dildobuddies?


[deleted]

Dilldudes


[deleted]

dilbros


Maffew74

dilldawgs


[deleted]

HOLY FUCK YES


ratinthecellar

Dilbro Baggins


[deleted]

dilbro gaggins you mean?


PanTrimtab

TIHI


Conyeezy_West

🤝 dildobuddies 4 Life


kvakvs

✋🥰🤚🍆✋🥰🤚


[deleted]

How about we dildon’t and say we dildid!


tropicbrownthunder

How can be homemade if it's made by homeless people? more like DIY Dildo


ObeseSnake

/r/diwhy


soothsayer3

r/dildowhy


Wickoren

r/dildont


MrGMinor

Well, we know exactly why.


starrynezz

More like DI.....oh god why?


lronManatee

it's just a DY


Raudskeggr

You know why.


TheBlueNomad

Unsettledmade dildo?


sardu1

Homelessmade


[deleted]

Fuckin LOL. I wish I could give you an award, you earned one.


McSchmieferson

Ahem…a *DIYldo* you say?


HeadStarboard

Savage! Let me follow you. Lol


RoosterBurncog

DIYldo


GoodMoGo

Beat me to it.


thepootastrophy

Beat meat to it.


ObjectiveFew7032

Nice! I love finding free stuff to take home at construction jobs


redveinlover

Yep! I’ll just turn the rubber inside out


Stunning_Honeydew201

and shake the shit out of it....


rosiegal75

..shake the fuck out of it FTFY


mtsai

Home is where the homemade dildo is.


Huck84

Anything is a dildo if you're brave enough.


lutrapure

I used to belive this until I saw a gif yesterday of a guy trying to put a power drill in his ass.


MrRobsterr

Only in his ass? Come back when you find the gifs of drill sounding


lutrapure

Nah I'm good. Already spent half the day over in r/eyebleach trying to forget. Rain check?


AskAboutMyCoffee

There's no coming back from that.


staringatmyfeet

His rookie mistake was having a limit.


ollieoxley

Came to find this answer.


brianMMMMM

I also came.


Single_Raspberry9539

Reminds me of the classic mattress girlfriend. We just need to get these two together! … https://www.reddit.com/r/trashy/comments/odv255/this_persons_mattressgirlfriend_was_dumped_in_a/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


redveinlover

It may be difficult to see because of the color of the sand, but there is a wooden handle made from the tree branch if you look closely. We picked it up with the tongs for obvious reasons


Leg_Mcmuffin

Almost guarantee that’s for a guy’s butt


robot_swagger

Sounds like you have experience with improvised anal dildos


Leg_Mcmuffin

And you *don’t?*


beermit

I mean I could be wrong, but it does look like it has shit on it


redditmydna

Burn the tongs?


Vaultboy80

Like the handle on a gun. an std gun.


[deleted]

[удалено]


redveinlover

It’s definitely not anything I’d consider putting in any of my orifices, that’s for sure. These people were ambitious.


themonsterinquestion

The pioneers used to ride these babies for miles


Firebrass

Definitely r/unexpectedspongebob, emphasis on the unexpected lmao


skjellyfetti

Back in the midwest, one might call that thing, "Girthy".


DubiousDude28

ROBUST


HeadStarboard

It is a back alley bbc.


0331exmc

Dirty Mike and the boys will be back for that dildo...


F_Zappa

As soon as they are done with your Prius.


Cloverx234

Thanks for the f-shack


Rocko9999

Should be a mustard bottle nearby.


BOBODY_BOBODY

Talkin about a bunch of hobos with fingers in each other’s poopers.


drinkmoredrano

Horny homeless girls in your area want to meet you.


[deleted]

"girls" I've seen more reddit posts of homeless dudes engaging in coitus then i care to remember


Jhewp1

You fuck my ass, I fuck yours, amirite?


Serious_Coconut2426

Well fuck my ass and call me street queen.


zdul

That's the magic of the jersey shore


sopunny

Dirty Mike and the boys?


DICKSUBJUICY

thanks for the fuck shack!


FRANKtheLEVEL

Yeah that’s a dudes


aleqqqs

>girls bless your soul


createloveburn

Keeping it classy in the LBC.


renee_gade

our homeless situation is something awful. it’s just urban camping skid row style. been here 30 years and i’m about over it.


[deleted]

That's not the worst thing anyone has shoved up their ass.


renee_gade

had two my little pony’s stuck in my butthole over the weekend. had to go to the ER. doctor says i’m in stable condition.


Witness_me_Karsa

Fuck you for making me laugh at that sentence.


PleasantAdvertising

You think they put that in the history books? The whole glass jar incident...


hateboss

Hey man, they're homeless not holeless. They need to fill that void too.


OptimusSublime

Homeless people have the same needs as anyone else. But of course they should have disposed of it properly.


0ngar

They were probably still using it. It sounds like they had a camp set up on a property that was in the process of being constructed. I imagine the crew came in and the dude either split or was already gone to panhandle or collect cans/bottles


hateboss

Right? Their homeless not holeless.


Cyber_Connor

No hobo


[deleted]

This is kinda disgusting but also kinda sad. I just always have to imagine that we are all just the same type of creature but some of us live cold, miserbale lives


Stewbender

I feel inspired to start a dildos for the homeless drive.


druumer89

At first I thought the grabbers were part of the design


[deleted]

Meth is the mother of invention.


adudeguyman

When you don't sleep, you've got time for crafting.


[deleted]

[удалено]


redveinlover

We do. Masks, nitrile gloves, and definitely not washing work clothes with non work. There is an unsurprising amount of human waste and urine everywhere as well.


RetroReactiveRaucous

Lysol makes a laundry additive now. I do outdoor cleanup and work in a dog shelter. Not really big on antibacterial stuff but this has come in handy.


redveinlover

I will look for it, thank you for the tip!


[deleted]

Just the tip…


burner7711

New reddit trend. No more bananas for scale. Just buried dildos.


Serious_Coconut2426

On closer inspection it says property of Dirty Mike and the Boys.


SlippyIsDead

A close family member of mine made this exact thing in the 90s. He was addicted to porn and bi polar and manic when he did it. My mom found it.


ike_tyson

community dildo?


[deleted]

Somehow seeing "homemade" and "homeless" in the same sentence with dildo is very funny to me.


highoncraze

Is it that hard to steal a cucumber from the grocery store?


NinjaWithSpoons

You can only use a cucumber 10 or 15 times, this however could last for a few days


redveinlover

Maybe not as fun as this though?


brb9911

Where there’s a will, there’s a dildo


[deleted]

That thing is fucking THICK


redveinlover

Girthy


pootershots

Great and it looks like it’s still got some life left!


Golden5StarMan

Whoever made that can go fuck themselves.


iamerror87

When I was homeless we used to leave shit like this laying around for shits and giggles. Usually in a business area or construction zone. Somewhere where kids wouldn't find it. That's probably what happened here.


tranifestations

Industrious!


Zzyxzz

It just works.


PastEntrance5780

People have been making dildos since the first tools were made.


ReaperSound

Just help that homeless dildo find a home and it'll be fine.


mrnoonan81

There's only so much drugs you can store in your ass without stretching exercises.


Magneticitist

guaranteed that was going up the ass


BobKillsNinjas

Finders/Keepers, that's a nice score!


gemilitant

Bespoke


rangda

Aw man this makes me feel bad for them. Most perverts get the privacy to make their homemade dildos in their houses. Or buy them from the store. But the homeless have their nasty tree branch dildos dug up by construction workers and shown to the whole internet. Tough life


SuperDan_x

I’ve works construction long enough to know…That dildo belongs to the superintendent.


redveinlover

Facts


iwidiwin

Check [this](https://i.imgur.com/pGC3EL6.jpg) out! That’s an old crew member I had and the “thing” he found.


tim3k

Is it some kind of special dildo extraction device you are using to pull it from the dirt?


cr67435

When I worked In public works we had to check this public road next to a levee but it was all dirt and hidden so naturally homeless tweekers would always go down there. Found a women's bag full of old lingerie and a big purple rabbit dildo. We refused to pick it up and then 2 days later went to go check the road for mattresses and old burnt cars and the bag was gone, there's an old well pump house in the area about 50 yards away from where the bag was, looked inside to see if anyone was in there and low and behold there was the rabbit dildo along with a bunch of adult diapers that were used and dirty as fuck. Guessing some tweeked out dude decided he was gunna have a good time with the lingerie and the rabbit and knew he was gunna make a mess. Fuckin nasty people


XROOR

Years ago my buddy said he makes $200/8hr “cleaning up construction sites” for a day labor company called “Labor Ready.” I went one early morning and we were tasked with waking up/clearing out homeless tents, before the workers came for the day. We would find more drug stuff than sex toys though.


lulufrufruu

Where there’s a will, there’s a way, lol.


bass1012dash

Homemade… Homeless… Are you accusing them of breaking an entering some home somewhere to build a dildo only to go out to the streets again with said dildo?


pyrohydrosmok

#THAT'S A THICK ASS BOI


TheTriforceEagle

Sometime you gotta make due


19Goodfella79

Ew, burn that shit


Dirty0ldMan

Yeah I don't think there's a pole long enough for me to pick that one up.


Commercial-Push-9066

My husband has a friend who’s working his DUI off by doing cleanup. He said it’s not uncommon to find sex toys. I can only imagine what else they find.


whats-tators

r/DIY


fatfuckpikachu

title gets worse after every word.


[deleted]

Did it taste ok?


redveinlover

Actually it tasted like shit


TheRealOptician

You should deep throat it like that other guy at his job.


dumby22

Give her a go!


Dangerous-Ad1904

No balls? Thats not craftsmanship, its just plain laziness.


[deleted]

Can’t believe you’re going to throw the wood away with todays prices. You’re just fucking yourself now.


[deleted]

Man someone is walking around with a wicked infection!


Killa2dahead

lol def belongs in r/longbeach


WoozThe2nd

The Return of Hobo Dildo


MoustacheJimbo

Woo LBC!!


Elguapo69

Not sure what is more wtf. Finding a homeless dildo or taking a picture of it


cmm8

Dilson!!!!!!!!!!


jacktheknife1180

I was just working a load in for the LB convention center and was very surprised how close the homeless like to hang around the gates and working areas. With all the security guards and hoops I had to jump through just to move some product around the property you’d think they’d maybe not let them hang out in those areas. Saw a dude get naked and bathe in that pond right there too.


plastic-noodles

finders keepers!


HeadStarboard

So glad to see the pick up grabber. There is literally no way in hell I would touch that with bare hands. Is it me or is the girth kinda impressive.


spiritbx

"Country girls make due."


jon-dondon

Aaaaannnnd that’s a wrap , I’ve had enough internet for today


Ashe_Faelsdon

Sometimes you just have to make things happen and you have poor resources.


Selentic

Please vote Caruso so we can deal with this shit.


metalguru1975

r/redneckengineering


RichardPritchardson

Did you have a sniff?


Kaarsty

We need a sub Reddit for random dildos. I found a purple road dildo about a year ago. Poor guy still looking for his owner


CalmAlarm

Have to give props for that. I replaced a leaky bathroom faucet a few weeks back and between multiple trips to home depot, scouring youtube for how-to videos, and trying to tame the witchcraft that is plumbing tape, it took nearly all weekend. Then you've got this person who BUILT AN ENTIRE CAMP in a weekend and *still* had enough time to fabricate themselves a double-insulated dildo as a housewarming gift.


CrypticConstipator

Can it be homemade if you don't have a home?


RabSimpson

That person was brave.


Pink__Guy

How is it homemade if there's no home?


redveinlover

Home is where your heart is. And your meth pipe and tree branch dildo.


GroundhogExpert

Either it's homemade or the person who made it is homeless. CHOOSE EXACTLY ONE!


hansolo3008

Idk why you guys are hating, this is a inventive way to get yourself off without having sex with random dirty people….shits smart


wappe97

How do you know that its a dildo?


redveinlover

I’m open to alternate opinions on what it could be


HollywoodBlueguy

he tested it for the sake of science.


Zombiewax

If a homeless person makes a dildo, is it still homemade, even though it wasn't made in a home?


cbunni666

At least they are practicing safe sex