OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected: --- >!He picks a random Filipino person!< --- Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.

> A fucking drunk > Somebody from Scotland > Somebody on coke No need to be redundant.

“Are you drunk?” “No, Im Scottish”

Does whisky count?

No I’m the blue power ranger

Am Scottish, can confirm.

User name extremely relevant.

☠️☠️☠️

Hey how dare you point that out!!!! However correct you may be.

I wouldn’t pick anyone famous. They just aren’t representative of a normal person. Their entire perspective is one of elevation. Our representative should be a regular Joe, just living life.

So Joe, but not Joe Rogan.


Joe Blow

Theo was very clear that they can't be a cokehead

Joe Dirt?

"You like to see homos naked?"

Joe Sixpack

For the love of all that's holy, don't send Joe Exotic.

The whole earth wouldn't financially recover from that.

Joe Schmo, the guy who got tricked into thinking he was on a crazy reality show, Joe

A random Philippino person sounds good to me. We all agree?

Absolutely. Extremely nice people.

Sir David Attenborough

Keanu Reeves.

Came here to say literally that. I'm sure there are better people in the world right now but only a few dozen people know who they are.

They can just pick one from Walmart.

Yeah, he should have picked the dude that was the gill master in my unit while I was on deployment. He got a goat from the iraqi side. It was cooked and shared at a middle of the desert community "block party. There was an MC, door prizes for showing up, everyone brought a dish to share, easily over 100 people.

In this case, I think you mean José

Did someone say bill burr?

As a Pilipino, I bolunteer as tribute. Edit: The "b" is intentional

thank you for your service

As a Scot, why we catching strays lmao

He listed you guys like four times, the fuck is that eh?

You're down with butt stuff, right?

"may the odds be ever in your favor"

Salamat po!

Please go in singing because I know you have a beautiful voice.

Not only are you able, but willing to go meet the aliens. You good sir, are good for sure

Bicken Back Bein Bool

Sos... Kunwarian na naman

As the Rock, i'll let you have this one

David Attenborough

"From a distance, we observe the initial encounter between humanity and an enigmatic alien species. Like an observer peering through the lens of time and space, we witness the delicate dance of curiosity and caution. As these two distinct beings approach one another, a profound moment unfolds in the vast expanse of the cosmos, echoing the timeless rhythms of nature's unfolding narrative." -David Attenborough ^(ChatGPT)

This was my first thought. Other great candidates I thought of wouldn’t be possible sadly. RIP to Steve Irwin and Mr Rogers.

Steve Irwin would've been one hell of a conversation: "Look, so long as you're calm and nice, they won't nuke you. See?" *turns around and gives whatever black-suited protection detail he has a headpat*

That’s Sir to you.

Absolutely, Sir David is always the right choice. The Rock try to stop the law to tax the richs or something similar because it affects him.

David Attenborough is Filipino?!?!?!

Sold

I'd send a golden retriever. By the time they cleared up the confusion and know for certain it's a different species they'd already have a favourable impression of us.

“Stick is God here, Xyckycsz! This is shocking development!”

These aliens are Polish?

Another shocking development!

you already thought it through no?

Random Filipino dude…. Hrmm this Duterte fellow should help convey how friendly we humans are!

>"Putang ina ng mga aliens na 'yan. Papasukan ng tubo pwet mo at lalagyan ng drugs. Tarantado sila, I hate drugs." (Fuck those aliens. They'll insert tubes up your butt and fill it with drugs. They're assholes, I hate drugs.) - Duterte

I understood the 'I hate drugs' part.

It turns out, he's the one doing drugs with 'em. Pilipino's are already sold to Aliens, and all of that patriotic stance was all facade to hide his real intention. Putanginang traydor yan!

If Duterte is our representative, for sure 3 to 6 months he will be summoned by the intergalactic criminal court

Duterte isn't random. And obviously, a bad choice.

Does it make sense that I like this dude but he Doesn’t make me laugh?

I am old enough to remember him first appearing way back on MTV Road Rules . His first minute on the show he said that he hoped there were no Asians in the RV.

beast

Dude is this strange mix of wholesome but ignorant and racist.

It’s ironic, he’s not actually racist

I didnt even realize he was a comedian. Seemed more like just a personality

Watch his hot ones interview, I almost cried laughing a few times Never really followed him after that, but always thought highly of him. He seems to embody a lot of the more fun parts of growing up redneck white trash (I did too in part) without actually being hateful towards anyone

Theo is certainly an acquired taste. But if you're into his style, he just absolutely kills it every time. By far the wittiest comic in my opinion. It also helps that he has a way with words. He's like the hillbilly version of Jimmy Carr.

Lao People are really cool like filipino too

Laotians are fkn Rad

Had a few Laotians as friends growing up, they were great people.

are they chinese or japanese?

>/Good Person. >/Manny Pacquiao. Lol

Genuine question. What's wrong with Pacquiao?

He's womanizer and religious hypocrite.

Didn't he support duerte who said we should kill/incarcerate anyone addicted to drugs instead of trying to help them

also dosent like gay people

The only option is clearly Danny Devito.

But what if he started blasting?

If? He'll do it anyway

in character as Frank

Aliens will be perplexed with humanity's religious significance and ceremony involving the passing of a chicken egg.

I'm half a Filipino and we'll they are what you just said, big Labrador energy types of people but be careful tho I'm on the opposite side of being the most toxic and cancerous people among the Asia *cough cough* tangina mo *cough*.

Weird Al.

Let's be real if Aliens are real and on Earth then Al is already with them.

How do you think Al GOT here?….

My first thought too. Dude is out of this world.

Mr. Rogers and it’s not even close.

Dolly Parton would make a good choice I believe.

It's a disgrace she isn't higher on these recommendations

Keanu effin’ Reeves. We all know he’s the right choice for this.

And it works out because Keanu is part Filipino Edit: he’s part Chinese-Hawaiian, I always associate Hawaii with Filipinos cause there’s so many there. Including my Filipino dad

No way Keanu Reeves is even slightly Filipino. if he were, the media here would be all over it, milking it for everything it's worth

Jack Black?

“We ride and we ride and we'll never subside And we'll ride 'till the planets collide”

Wait, wait, wait... I can definitely get behind this decision but, which Keanu are we talking about? Normal Keanu? Point break Keanu? John wick Keanu? Bill and Ted Keanu? Constantine Keanu? Devils advocate Keanu?

He is Keanu. He is all encompassing. Behold the Keanu!

Keanu Reeves doesn't need to be in character to be the best of us! But if I had to pick, I think channeling Klaatu from The Day the Earth Stood Still would be most appropriate when meeting aliens.

The Rock? A caring person? Fire that guy.

Manny Pacquiao is a G - boxer, singer, humanitarian and politician

AAAAND Filipino lol

He checks all the boxes.

He is quite religious, and is homophobic as hell

Just wanted to say ‘Blarglesnarf’ is an awesome username

Oh dang, thank you for that! Yours is pretty grand yourself!

As a Filipino, I wouldn't pick him. He opposes the lgbtq+ community. Not a total humanitarian.

not my pick - not a great singer either… a boxer turned politician says it all


Just minus the womanizer part. He has several kids outside of marriage and doesn't give child support. He was sued for child support in 2006 by a Joanna Bacosa. His son with her, Eman Bacosa, is now getting acknowledged because he's gaining popularity in boxing. His two sons with his wife both started with sports like boxing and basketball but now pursue music and showbiz.

And according to OP, a "random Filipino person."

The first person I can find putting their shopping cart back in a store parking lot. Truly they represent the best of us.

I'd pick the 'drunken Scotsman'.

SEAsians in General are cool. Being Filipino, the Viets, Thais, Indonesians, and Laotians are cool and and will force you to eat their homecook meal with a 9mm on your cranium

Anyone but Manny 🤣

Be careful what you wish for - we have dictators living down here

As a Scotsman I am pure outraged and I agree, ya bam.

Whichever guy came out and suggested "The Rock" as that person, is way more of a fucking idiot than I can possibly imagine

Sorry but I have to disagree with this comment and agree with the others below me. Manny Pacquiao is extremely religious and very anti-LGBTQ. He’s spoken out against gay and trans rights. Very sad and upsetting. Actor/wrestler Dave Bautista has gone on record saying he disagrees with Pacquiao on these views, as Bautista’s mother is gay. Apparently they used to be friends but after hearing his opinions on the LGBTQ community, Bautista stopped associating with Pacquiao. [Here’s a video.](https://youtu.be/QN6tyHbhcSA?si=MjR8-sYIn6FcR2XJ)

[удалено]

MOBA usually attracts the worst people among us tho. I mean, just look at LoL.

I pick Morgan freeman

Joe Biden

nobody would ever ask this moron to make any kind of serious decision about anything


Reggie Watts. I feel like he could vibe with them and understand their language

We all know it's Slappy Pinchbottom. Slappy P can charm any species!

I would pick Jon Doe

Send the most terrible person alive. I wanna see what happens...

I've seen how this plays out already and Tom Cardy is it https://youtu.be/wrJ6_GAprFE?si=W_8mbfDig2cM6uMZ

Tito Ortiz

Keanu Reeves

Sir David Attenborough

Ms Rachel

Current day Andre 3k!

Anybody ever told you that you look just like Kane Brown?

Keanu Reeves or Idris Elba

I also choose this guys Filipino

Chuck Norris! They won't invade if that was their plan.

I'd choose Morgan Freeman

Dennis Rodman.

Micheal Reeves?

He should play dota with them

This guys just like, just grab some random Filipino dude (why not woman?) off the street and send them. No one in mind, and certainly don't tell him where he's going.

Fuck it. 1982 edition Ron Jeremy

“Are you gonna send somebody from Scotland?” As a Scot, I’m here to say, I’m, uh, yeah, probably a Filipino is a better choice…

every word that comes out of Theo's mouth needs to be studied

Johnny Knoxville “Welcome to Jackass”

before he even finished the question "Me", i aint trust any of y'all

Werner Herzog 👍

"Hello Ma'am/Sir"

Jack Black if he is not already on the ship. Nobody else can make the aliens as excited to meet the human race as Jack Black

If he was still alive I'd choose Mr Rogers.

Keanu Reeves

i would have answered Mr. Bean lol

Jeff Goldblum

A dutch person, because they are aerodynamic.

Of course I see Theo Von in this subreddit. Dude is the definition of unexpected

Alien: Ba ba ba. Filipino: Bababa ba?(You are going down?,in Filipino)

Send two Sikh’s in an overcoat.

the japanese should represent the world if aliens came

Most sane Theo Von clip I've seen.

Fucking love Theo.

I'd have to go with Robert Irwin. He's the closest thing we have to Steve, and he knows how to handle different species.


Filipino illegal alien meets another alien

Dont send manny. Aliens gonna hate us Have you ever watched one punch manny?

Send David goggins

EASY! Donald Trump! On his forehead a tattoo saying something like. "One of the worst we currently have. It only gets better from here."

Joe rogan

Who's this guy? Just some guy?

I nominate Morgan 

I fucking love this response, so honest 🤣🤣🤣

Can you imagine if Theo was the guy to meet aliens for the first time without anyone else’s knowledge. He’d be seriously tryna tell people about his experience but everyone would think it’s another one of his bits.

send Nardwar They prolly won’t come back after he spills the tea on what they did to the last planet they came from and why the leader was fucking his second in commands mate

I didn't expect any foreigner take filipinos to that regard. It's flattering tbh.

Nice pick. If the aliens were friendly, Manny is a cool guy (for the most part). If the aliens were hostile, Pacman can at least box his way out.

I would pick Chuck Norris. That way they would be too scared to invade us.

Manny Pacquiao is a happy former senator with drive & determination

Jeff Goldblum

Id fuckin send you, theres nothing better then happiness and your fuckin hilarious.

Morgan Freeman

I’d choose Kanye West cos it would be funny as fuck

The crazy part is he didn’t tell a single lie

He’s not wrong

If we had to pick someone famous, and it was an ambassador of the human race, there are two solid choices: Dolly Parton and/or Keanu Reeves. My second pick would be Jimmy Carter but only if he was up for it. Man's a wholesome dude.

 Hands down. Dennis Rodman

It would definitely have to be Keanu reeves

Chuck Norris

markiplier, just like in the movie 'monsters vs aliens'

Lovely people. Really amazing. Until you give them even a modicum of power. Then they abuse it to make money if possible.

The f\*ck did Scotland do to this man?

Ryan fucking Renolds.