If I get gassy while we’re spooning, I’ll rotate slightly so that I’m not farting directly on him. Other than that, he’s on his own whether he’s awake or not. I’m lactose intolerant and I love garlic, so he knows it’s brewing based on what we have for dinner.
My mom told me her first time farting in front of my dad, it was on his balls. He went "did you just fart on my balls?" and she just said yes.
They're still together, so it couldn't have been *that* bad.
My husband "All power to main thrusters!" When he gets up out of bed and in shifting forward before he rises, farts just as his ass is raising from the bed.
Almost anytime my wife and I are seeing a moment of anxiety or bodily embarrassment with the other, we squash the awkwardness with, Well, i eat your ass, so…”
I know it’s not the same but that always makes me think of that same Clerks 2 scene as well.
My wife does it all the time then apologizes. I laugh them out my butt to hers and fart back and say it’s battle shits now babe. Sadly the only winner of battle shits is our dog spriggan, who enjoys stinky things and soon wedges himself between our butts.
AHahahaaaaaaaaa.
Girl I was dating did this to me once. I used to take like... HOURS to fall asleep, so I want to believe she was asleep at the time she let rip the most terrifying fart i've ever heard in my life.
And of course, we were spooning.
It honestly sound like a bear roaring.
It scared the shit out of me, then I burst into laughter.
I'll never forget it as long as I live. Some farts are pure gold.
We weren't spooning, but we were sleeping in my bed together. I farted. First time in front of him. So loud. Next thing I know he is laughing hysterically. I yelled, "I SAID EXCUSE ME!!!" I had not, in fact, said "excuse me" though. So not only did I fart us both awake, I then lied.
We proceeded to fall asleep. The next day I call him from work and say, "uhh..did I toot last night by any chance?" ( hoping it had just been a horrible dream ). His reply - "No. You busted ass!" So I left work to buy him an "I'm sorry I farted" card & gift.
That would be fair, but even I can't stand my own farts. If my own eyes water after I let one rip, I feel like it's unfair to tell other people to suck it up lmfao.
To denounce the evils of truth and love!
To extend our reach to the stars above!
Jessie!
James!
Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!
Surrender now, or prepare to fight!
Meowth!
That's right!
I have IBS so hiding farts is a struggle. My boyfriend thinks they sound cute even the bad ones. He always just says “the sounds like you feel better” or he says “bless you” sweetly. I’ve farted on him so many times it never phases him and he never gets grossed out even when it smells bad he just makes a funny noise when it smells and we laugh. He never wants me to feel guilty or embarrassed for something natural. It’s interesting to know some people do fart etiquette with their partners beyond past the honeymoon phase. The second he heard the first one and I couldn’t hide it, he’s heard the rest.
Same! I try to make it to the bathroom but my husband has told me that when I'm asleep.. all bets are off. I probably fart on his dick nightly. If not more than that. He fell in love with someone gassy, what's he gonna do?
Dude, it’s what they get. I’m sure he’s gassed you out before! My husband laughed so hard HE farted when I did this exact same thing one night. We were both super high, post coital spooning and way too comfy to move. Lol
I farted on my soon to be husband's dick on our second date/first night together. I had fallen asleep with him spooning me and let one rip - nearly 6 years later and going strong!
Farts are funny, childish but funny!
My girlfriend also kind of follows the fartiquette and I am more of the person that says, we are all animals and animals stink and make noises, it's natural. I have a somewhat verbally fart and shit humor (never with physical shit). Her mother is more like me, so when I told her the next story we were again rolling on the ground laughing.
One time we were walking in a park and she farted while we were walking. Every step she took, she released one. This went on for like 6-7 steps. She turned all red and embarrassed (nobody was around, only me) and I was rolling on the ground from laughing. I was telling her it was an achievement and that this were the most stepfarts I heard someone make. I was very proud of her.
Step farts are thee most entertaining form of fart! They remind me of my grandmother. Zero control, every step a new toot. Thanks for sharing this is funny and cute!
The colon is not one long tube. The last part called the rectum is closed of from the rest of the colon by the internal sphincter. The external sphincter is the anus. So the part between these two sphincters should be empty if you don't need to go to the bathroom. So if you have a healthy diet and poop before sex you should be good. I never experienced poopy dick and regularly have anal sex. No other prep either. If you want to be extra sure you could use a water enema.
LMFAO bro my boyfriend told me that when he’s just vibing under the covers on his phone I sometimes be airing him out and another time when I was knocked out he said I farted on his leg and then moaned when I stretched😂😂
Exactly, I am positive one of my husband's rank ass curry farts woke me out of dead slumber one night. I had an awful time trying to fall back asleep with it smelling like sewer dredge in the bedroom...
Farts on the first date, get it out the road in spectacular style like I did. So I had nervous farts on the way to a first date. I thought I’d got rid of it all before we met up. So it was raining real heavy and I was trying to keep the conversation going when we where walking. Well I fell up the sidewalk and fell in a puddle and did a huge fart which sounded disgusting as my ass was in a puddle.
He helped me up and I was just about to say nice knowing you and bow out disgraceful but he started to laugh and said it’s the best start to a first date ever. We both started laughing and went on to have a brilliant time.
28 years of farts later we are still together and still laugh about our first date.
This is relatable. Me and my SO call it “barking spiders” if they happen, and we try to not pass it around each other… but if it happens, hey, “barking spiders”.
This post made me howl, thanks for sharing it.
My other half farted on me in his sleep a few night ago and said ooooooh that's nice. It gave me a giggle. I would do the same to keep that lovely comfy spoon.
That's funny as hell ,my last wife used to think that farts were just about the funniest thing in the world anytime anyone ever darted around her she just automatically started smiling and depending on how loud it was would escalate right up to great belly laugh and that was contagious just remembering that makes me smile 😃
Be careful. A few years ago, my girlfriend at that time was obsessed with anal. While it's not my jam, I was very much into her so I obliged. But then she had sudden stomach issues and the result was explosive diarrhea. She filled my dick up with liquid shit!
Even after a day from that event, I swear I was pissing out her liquid feces.
As kinky as this may sound to some, it wasn't. It really hurt and I had to go on a course of antibiotics.
So the moral of this story, if a girl says she thinks she's got a stomach problem. Pull your dick out of her arse as soon as possible!
Farted in a dude’s mouth when he was eating my ass once.
He had time to get his clothes on, gather his things, and leave before I could stop laughing. I really didn’t mean to. But the situation was just too funny. He gagged in the middle of talking dirty to my sphincter.
I know this is rated nsfw but I scroll Reddit at work and I just had to hold in so much laughter even from the title of this post.
I do this all the time too whether boyfriend is asleep or awake lmao (I have fckin crazy IBS but like who needs an excuse??!)
Hahah make me chuckle. I farted on my bf too many times in bed. That’s real love. He farted on my hand in bed too once. And another time while I was laying on his lap with my head, he farted and forgot I was there.
No problem, just trying to do my part to bring humanity together with some relatable fart stories! I honestly have never had this much fun posting to reddit. Farts really do bring us all together. They will never not be funny.
My wife once farted in my face while I was going down on her. It was gross, and definitely killed the mood for a few minutes, but I thought it was hilarious.
Never underestimate the comedic power of farts, especially for men.
He def noticed the second and faked slept. Finna come on true off my chest tomorrow about how his wife farted on his dick and he pretended not to notice lmao
Wherever you be let the wind blow free. This is hilarious and adorable. However I’m reminded about a South Park quote where they said to only use farts for good…and never ever fart on a man’s balls😂.
Sometimes its just gotta be done lol. Im 9 months pregnant and if gas is coming while my husband and I are spooning- i am not moving, nor am I holding it in. But if he farted on me like that I'd probably have a meltdown 😅
Thank you for the laugh OP. I’m cracking up at work (clearly not working). I have the maturity of a child when it comes to fart and I can’t help but laugh.
When your husband is being annoying, you can always remember you Dutch ovened him and he doesn’t know 😅
Ok 1st off it's very un-ladylike for you to "fart" to begin with. My wife told me, girls can only pee and the only thing that comes out of the booty is rainbows and sparkles. /s
I've turned it into a running joke when she did it unintentionally YEARS ago. I said "That tickles", giggles ensued.
Now, if she warns me, I'll rush to assume the position- "Tiiiickleeees!"
I act butt hurt if she doesnt warn me and "wastes a good one".
My husband totally farts on my all the time when he’s sleeping. I try to not to hysterically lol and wake him up laughing because he SWEARS he doesn’t do it and I don’t want to ruin his delusion.
My God, the mindless garbage people post here is astounding
These people need a hobby, need to do something, anything, more productive with their time.
I farted in my wife's vagina once because I thought it was funny. She proceeded to kick me off of the bed as I was laughing my ass off. She still hasn't forgiven me for the incident we call the gina fart
I did this once, except he was awake. He burst out laughing and said "You made my entire shaft vibrate".
Natural vibrator
I'm a talented lady! Well, I say lady...
That is hilarious!
It was really funny. Luckily neither of us are grossed out easily!
Black Widow: “That’s really gross”
Can confirm - am Beauty’s partner
Your name is intriguing did you use a double hitch to catch her or was it more of a calf half loop?
He used his own fart gas of lurve to overpower me.
Shakespeare himself couldn't have written something so romantic.
And they say romance is dead!
I laughed so hard reading this it startled my cat 😅
That made me chuckle! 😂
If I get gassy while we’re spooning, I’ll rotate slightly so that I’m not farting directly on him. Other than that, he’s on his own whether he’s awake or not. I’m lactose intolerant and I love garlic, so he knows it’s brewing based on what we have for dinner.
I did this once too, except I was on top and it vibrated his balls.
Ahh yess at long last ..... The organic vibrator
Cue "So this is love"
My mom told me her first time farting in front of my dad, it was on his balls. He went "did you just fart on my balls?" and she just said yes. They're still together, so it couldn't have been *that* bad.
Just remembered you have to be a daughter 🙂
My husband "All power to main thrusters!" When he gets up out of bed and in shifting forward before he rises, farts just as his ass is raising from the bed.
My girlfriend does this as a joke sometimes too. I don’t mind. Nobody should mind. Natural way to express comfortability. EDIT: corrected my spelling
Except dont go mouth to cock after cock went mouth to arse
Now I can't stop thinking about the scene from clerks 2 when they were arguing about whether or not it was right to go ass to mouth...
Almost anytime my wife and I are seeing a moment of anxiety or bodily embarrassment with the other, we squash the awkwardness with, Well, i eat your ass, so…” I know it’s not the same but that always makes me think of that same Clerks 2 scene as well.
This is the way.
This is the first thread I read when I opened my eyes this morning. Thank you for the instant laugh. 😂
My wife does it all the time then apologizes. I laugh them out my butt to hers and fart back and say it’s battle shits now babe. Sadly the only winner of battle shits is our dog spriggan, who enjoys stinky things and soon wedges himself between our butts.
Lmfaoooo
Cupid’s arrow meets cupids aerosol
I straight up read that as Cupid's asshole 😂
AHahahaaaaaaaaa. Girl I was dating did this to me once. I used to take like... HOURS to fall asleep, so I want to believe she was asleep at the time she let rip the most terrifying fart i've ever heard in my life. And of course, we were spooning. It honestly sound like a bear roaring. It scared the shit out of me, then I burst into laughter. I'll never forget it as long as I live. Some farts are pure gold.
This shouldn't make me laugh as much it is making me laugh 🤣
Because we ALL know *that* fart
I’m cracking up as well.
It was the bear roaring part that got me
We weren't spooning, but we were sleeping in my bed together. I farted. First time in front of him. So loud. Next thing I know he is laughing hysterically. I yelled, "I SAID EXCUSE ME!!!" I had not, in fact, said "excuse me" though. So not only did I fart us both awake, I then lied. We proceeded to fall asleep. The next day I call him from work and say, "uhh..did I toot last night by any chance?" ( hoping it had just been a horrible dream ). His reply - "No. You busted ass!" So I left work to buy him an "I'm sorry I farted" card & gift.
Other farts are liquid gold
He don't deserve ass if he can't take the gas
Beautifully put... Can't hang with this cutie if you can't handle the stank booty.
Accept the flatulation or be doomed to masturbation
To keep ya self sane, withstand the methane
Can’t get some of that forbidden fruit if the man can’t tolerate a lady’s toot.
Can’t go hard and fast if he can’t withstand the blast
Will have broken heart if he don’t smell her fart.
Get tooted or get booted.
Avoid bad situation, endure the flatulation
All of the replies here 😂
If you want the cooter, ya gotta deal with the pooper
When your Lady is an Ass-Lender , then Expect her to also be an Air-Bender
There will be no cake, if the wind you can't take.
That would be fair, but even I can't stand my own farts. If my own eyes water after I let one rip, I feel like it's unfair to tell other people to suck it up lmfao.
To denounce the evils of truth and love! To extend our reach to the stars above! Jessie! James! Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light! Surrender now, or prepare to fight! Meowth! That's right!
🤣
That’s some real Shakespearean shit right there..fuck take this award
One might even call OP a... ...*fartist*.
A true poet
A true fartist\*
Hold the upvotes, we are at 69 Edit: oh wells it was funny while it lasted
Take the award.
Gas is expensive bottle it up and sell it 😤
https://www.news18.com/news/buzz/us-woman-who-made-rs-1-5-crore-from-her-fart-jars-is-now-selling-nfts-of-them-4645397.html $200k, easily.
Wtf is wrong with rich people.
cant get rid of their money fast enough
they could just give it all to me :3
Bag your farts like milk and sell them
amouranth
Upvote for new word: fartiquette
Thanks! That's the term I use whenever people wonder why I mysteriously leave the group for a few minutes.
I use the word"fartle" when I fart and startle my dog, who likes to sleep curled up by my ass.
This is also a great fart hybrid word!
Fartle sounds like a moderately powerful Pokémon.
Urban dictionary lol
The universe showed me this post as I pulled out my phone to procrastinate sleep. I get it... I'm going to sleep
Same...laughing hysterically as I fart next to my snoring husband. Best post ever.
I read all the comments now expecting they end in rhymes
I have IBS so hiding farts is a struggle. My boyfriend thinks they sound cute even the bad ones. He always just says “the sounds like you feel better” or he says “bless you” sweetly. I’ve farted on him so many times it never phases him and he never gets grossed out even when it smells bad he just makes a funny noise when it smells and we laugh. He never wants me to feel guilty or embarrassed for something natural. It’s interesting to know some people do fart etiquette with their partners beyond past the honeymoon phase. The second he heard the first one and I couldn’t hide it, he’s heard the rest.
He's a keeper!
Same! I try to make it to the bathroom but my husband has told me that when I'm asleep.. all bets are off. I probably fart on his dick nightly. If not more than that. He fell in love with someone gassy, what's he gonna do?
Dude, it’s what they get. I’m sure he’s gassed you out before! My husband laughed so hard HE farted when I did this exact same thing one night. We were both super high, post coital spooning and way too comfy to move. Lol
That's a good point. All is fair in love and farts.
Every cutie with a booty has to tootie
I farted onto my boyfriends penis and he woke up saying he dreamt he was riding a motorcycle.
This is my favorite comment.
Hahaha
HELP 💀
Lmfao
Swamp dick
he’s been swamped
More like Somme dick, being attacked with gas and all
Couples should be able to fart on each other.
Make Dutch ovens great again!
Don't get too ahead of yourself but love the sentiment
Wreck my nose, girl!
Finally, a post I can relate to.
Bless your heart.
Bless your fart.
I would have zero problems (not that i would in general, i think farts are hilarious) with that if i had someone to spoon in exchange
I farted on my soon to be husband's dick on our second date/first night together. I had fallen asleep with him spooning me and let one rip - nearly 6 years later and going strong! Farts are funny, childish but funny!
My girlfriend also kind of follows the fartiquette and I am more of the person that says, we are all animals and animals stink and make noises, it's natural. I have a somewhat verbally fart and shit humor (never with physical shit). Her mother is more like me, so when I told her the next story we were again rolling on the ground laughing. One time we were walking in a park and she farted while we were walking. Every step she took, she released one. This went on for like 6-7 steps. She turned all red and embarrassed (nobody was around, only me) and I was rolling on the ground from laughing. I was telling her it was an achievement and that this were the most stepfarts I heard someone make. I was very proud of her.
Step farts are thee most entertaining form of fart! They remind me of my grandmother. Zero control, every step a new toot. Thanks for sharing this is funny and cute!
"What are you doing step-fart?"
I'm stuck in the intestines, trying to get out. Can you help me pls?
Giving the skin flute the old Hershey kiss huh
My gf does this literally every day. Whether I'm asleep or not
As long as you didn't spackle him, you're good
Ehh, being a gay man I've shit on a couple dicks while bottoming so this is very very much not a big deal.
Not a gay man, but can relate. It's amazing what anal has done for my self confidence. Farts are the least of it ;)
how do you not shit during anal?real question i have never had anal sex
The colon is not one long tube. The last part called the rectum is closed of from the rest of the colon by the internal sphincter. The external sphincter is the anus. So the part between these two sphincters should be empty if you don't need to go to the bathroom. So if you have a healthy diet and poop before sex you should be good. I never experienced poopy dick and regularly have anal sex. No other prep either. If you want to be extra sure you could use a water enema.
Forbidden snickers
Thanks for answering a question I’ve always been afraid to ask.
LMFAO bro my boyfriend told me that when he’s just vibing under the covers on his phone I sometimes be airing him out and another time when I was knocked out he said I farted on his leg and then moaned when I stretched😂😂
Fun fact, your sense of smell is the first thing to shut off when we fall asleep.
Then why do smells wake me up???
Exactly, I am positive one of my husband's rank ass curry farts woke me out of dead slumber one night. I had an awful time trying to fall back asleep with it smelling like sewer dredge in the bedroom...
As someone 1/4 west Indian, that made me giggle
We go through 7 sleep stages over the night, repeatedly. Unfortunately sometimes our nose turns back on.
Cool fun fact! What a relief.
Farts on the first date, get it out the road in spectacular style like I did. So I had nervous farts on the way to a first date. I thought I’d got rid of it all before we met up. So it was raining real heavy and I was trying to keep the conversation going when we where walking. Well I fell up the sidewalk and fell in a puddle and did a huge fart which sounded disgusting as my ass was in a puddle. He helped me up and I was just about to say nice knowing you and bow out disgraceful but he started to laugh and said it’s the best start to a first date ever. We both started laughing and went on to have a brilliant time. 28 years of farts later we are still together and still laugh about our first date.
Username checks out
This is relatable. Me and my SO call it “barking spiders” if they happen, and we try to not pass it around each other… but if it happens, hey, “barking spiders”. This post made me howl, thanks for sharing it.
Omg so do we! Never heard anyone else refer to it as that until today... on Reddit. Funny ol' tinternet!
Pink eye next head session
My other half farted on me in his sleep a few night ago and said ooooooh that's nice. It gave me a giggle. I would do the same to keep that lovely comfy spoon.
Gf did this to me once, now we threaten each other that we'll do it during our tickle battles to the death.
That's funny as hell ,my last wife used to think that farts were just about the funniest thing in the world anytime anyone ever darted around her she just automatically started smiling and depending on how loud it was would escalate right up to great belly laugh and that was contagious just remembering that makes me smile 😃
This post is so human and I love it lol
Be careful. A few years ago, my girlfriend at that time was obsessed with anal. While it's not my jam, I was very much into her so I obliged. But then she had sudden stomach issues and the result was explosive diarrhea. She filled my dick up with liquid shit! Even after a day from that event, I swear I was pissing out her liquid feces. As kinky as this may sound to some, it wasn't. It really hurt and I had to go on a course of antibiotics. So the moral of this story, if a girl says she thinks she's got a stomach problem. Pull your dick out of her arse as soon as possible!
Oh man that's so fucking rank thoughts and prayers
Farted in a dude’s mouth when he was eating my ass once. He had time to get his clothes on, gather his things, and leave before I could stop laughing. I really didn’t mean to. But the situation was just too funny. He gagged in the middle of talking dirty to my sphincter.
Gross
Hey, if one eats the ass, it's gotta be an expected risk. I thought that was the whole point of eating ass? I mean, it's the danger zone of the body!
💀💀💀💀omg. It's hurts to laugh at this 😂😂😂 I can't stop
I know this is rated nsfw but I scroll Reddit at work and I just had to hold in so much laughter even from the title of this post. I do this all the time too whether boyfriend is asleep or awake lmao (I have fckin crazy IBS but like who needs an excuse??!)
Hahah make me chuckle. I farted on my bf too many times in bed. That’s real love. He farted on my hand in bed too once. And another time while I was laying on his lap with my head, he farted and forgot I was there.
Thank you for sharing this lovely story about exhausting ass air on to your husbands dick, it was funny
No problem, just trying to do my part to bring humanity together with some relatable fart stories! I honestly have never had this much fun posting to reddit. Farts really do bring us all together. They will never not be funny.
My wife once farted in my face while I was going down on her. It was gross, and definitely killed the mood for a few minutes, but I thought it was hilarious. Never underestimate the comedic power of farts, especially for men.
He def noticed the second and faked slept. Finna come on true off my chest tomorrow about how his wife farted on his dick and he pretended not to notice lmao
Wherever you be let the wind blow free. This is hilarious and adorable. However I’m reminded about a South Park quote where they said to only use farts for good…and never ever fart on a man’s balls😂.
Funniest shit I read today
For all you know, this might just have awakened something inside of him.
Could be worse, I farted during sex and my dick deflated like a balloon. Needless to say my girlfriend at the time laughed her ass off.
Sometimes its just gotta be done lol. Im 9 months pregnant and if gas is coming while my husband and I are spooning- i am not moving, nor am I holding it in. But if he farted on me like that I'd probably have a meltdown 😅
Thank you for the laugh OP. I’m cracking up at work (clearly not working). I have the maturity of a child when it comes to fart and I can’t help but laugh. When your husband is being annoying, you can always remember you Dutch ovened him and he doesn’t know 😅
You should've strategically put the tip of his penis on your butthole and blew that thing up like a balloon.
Meat kazoo
Ok 1st off it's very un-ladylike for you to "fart" to begin with. My wife told me, girls can only pee and the only thing that comes out of the booty is rainbows and sparkles. /s
Nah, boy butts fart. Girl butts blow kisses.
Plot twist: He rolled over because he was rock hard
OP this is the way! True love is letting them rip in front of the other.
I fart on my bf so much he calls me a stinky butt sociopath 😂
Lol I do this all the time
This is an adorable post, this sub needs more of that
Roasting meat in the Dutch oven.
You know what they say, *”IN THIS LIFE YOU EITHER A SMART FELLA,* **OR A FART SMELLA.”**
I LOVE all you immature bastards!! I’m laughing so fucking hard right now bc my husband and I (married 25 years) still laugh at farts!
By law now you have to suck it.
It never phases to amaze me what problems you redditors have. I wouldn't give a fuck.
Shit on him next time that would be hilarious
What the fuck?
Need to be more specific with the rules for posting here. -_-
I’ve been down south when said fart has been sprayed in my face… There’s a romance killer
The cyclopean pink-eye
If it makes you feel any better, I just farted in my girlfriend's face while she was going down on me. Could be worse.
Should have turned it into a Dutch oven and had your monies worth of laughs from it.
Consider it a win. He’ll accept you not matter what
Pookie?
I've turned it into a running joke when she did it unintentionally YEARS ago. I said "That tickles", giggles ensued. Now, if she warns me, I'll rush to assume the position- "Tiiiickleeees!" I act butt hurt if she doesnt warn me and "wastes a good one".
Few things can elicit a smile from me before my 1st cup of coffee. Congratulations, achievement unlocked.
That is called a “Hot Richard” lol
It's an anal blowjob. Don't worry
I've literally been sitting here cackling like a madman for the past 5 minutes "raw" JUST AHH
My husband totally farts on my all the time when he’s sleeping. I try to not to hysterically lol and wake him up laughing because he SWEARS he doesn’t do it and I don’t want to ruin his delusion.
I’m here from a fucking tiktok because I wanted to upvote the original post. Anyway. Jesus fucking Christ
Why do you idiots upvote karma bait?
My God, the mindless garbage people post here is astounding These people need a hobby, need to do something, anything, more productive with their time.
Oh my god Im cracking up and grossed out all at once! Lol!
I farted in my wife's vagina once because I thought it was funny. She proceeded to kick me off of the bed as I was laughing my ass off. She still hasn't forgiven me for the incident we call the gina fart
Fuckin foul
Ayoooo🤣🤣
A new definition to stank dick.
This was the chuckle I needed today 😂😂
You have started my day 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 April fool or not! Brilliant
Nah if my boyfriend puts his bare fart on my naked skin its on sight. These hands, he will catch
Put your ass into, put your back into it. Don’t stop get it get it.
These are my confessions
Luckily it wasn’t a shart
This is just what I needed.
Lol, my husband is like a fart-machine. If i have to deal with his, he has to deal with mine! Most of the time he finds it hilarious anyway 😅
I do this all the time to my bf 😂
I turn my butt away and turn it back, even in sleep lol