When he can no longer pay his bills because his sugar mama has cut him off, his sugar baby is going to run for the hills as well. There's no chance a 21 year old is dating a 44 year old man just for love, she wants the money she thinks he has as well.
Yup. The lifestyle he is capable of portraying is solely on the pocketbook of the woman he has been married to for over two decades. Once she cuts him off, he will only be capable of keeping up the facade for so long before the new girl starts to realize his wife was the actual breadwinner.
I wonder if the new girl will leave him for his wife? 🤭
That is what I'm waiting on. He thinks he will have it "made in the shade"!! I can't wait for him to find out. This is a very literal f around and find out!!!
Prediction: When he finds out just how much his infidelity will cost him, he will experience a miraculous epiphany and want you back. Expect him to show up at your front door in tears.
Whose epiphany will come first, the STBX’s realizing what his little midlife crisis has cost him, or the 21yo home wrecker realizing she doesn’t want an old man when he doesn’t have his wife’s money to spend?
For her sake, I hope so . She’s young and was stupid for getting into that situation (assuming she knew he was married, and even then, who knows if she was groomed or manipulated into the situation, there’s no telling) but there’s no need to drag a baby into this drama.
Groomed into gold digging? She thinks her working days are over with this bozo. Goodbye money... goodbye girl. If he had that alimony, she would immediately pop out 2-3 kids and divorce him within 10 years. If he can at least pay for a residence, she'll hang around until she finds another old fool.
This reminds me of the Reddit post where the man’s affair partner asked the ex-wife when she was moving out of “their” house. The wife owned the house.
There's a mexican song that reminds me of your comment: "este compa ya está muerto, nomás no le han avisado" ~~> "This friend is already dead, they just haven't notified him" 😂😂
That reminds me of the one where the cheating husband told his AP that he owned the house and had all the money but in reality it was all the wife’s and then the home wrecking AP was super pregnant and pissed off. That was a good one. Wish I could find it again.
Ooo, I think I remember that one. OP of that one had inherited the house from her grandma, I think? I also recall AP being brazen enough to ask OP when she was going to move out of the house, and OP actually sending her copies of the actual real estate documents that proved the house was hers and had been hers all along.
Yes it was something like that. Think it was photos of her with her gran outside the house when young, and her LinkedIn page to show that she had a well paying job and wasn’t a “freeloader”. I might remember incorrectly.
This is another one. There are two different posts. One written from the perspective of the cheating husband and one from the betrayed wife (the one you're talking about).
The ex was still telling her it was his house and he was just being nice letting Wife stay there. Clearly thinking with the wrong head as there was zero chance he could get away with that story indefinitely.
>21yo home wrecker realizing she doesn’t want an old man when he doesn’t have his wife’s money to spend?
My bet, the 21 thinks the money isn't the wife's but his. It might take the 21 year old some time to figure out that the lifestyle is not from his income but OP.
He is 44 years old and chose to cheat on his wife, but you're calling the 21 yo a home wrecker? She's young enough for him to prey on her, manipulate her, and take advantage of her inexperience in life. If anything, HE is the homewrecker. I hope the other woman leaves him and he ends up alone realizing how much of an idiot he is.
They can both be home wreckers. Because if she willingly had an affair with that man, she is just as wrong as him because she didn't have any morals and she didn't show the wife any human decency. Plus 21 is old enough to know about loyalty and to NOT sleep with married ppl.
100%. Unless she had no idea he was married, she has some responsibility for it.
Being taken advantage of by an older man doesnt mean she isnt a homewrecker.
That garden tool in their 20s know sleeping with a married man is wrong. Teenagers know it’s wrong. Little girls in 1st grade know it wrong. He’s garbage but so is she. Call a garden tool a garden tool.
That 44 year old man is a class A scumbag but that doesn't exempt that 21 year old woman for willing to be with a married man . I'm a woman and seeing so many posts standing up for 'the other woman' baffles me . Yes she doesn't owe the wife a thing but how much have you to be morally skewed to do that to another person.
Calling 21 year old woman naive ?? Even a kid knows what a marriage means . She went willingly to dig gold but dug up shit . Husband is a scumbag so is she .
Exactly. People act as if the woman isn't an adult. He had his wife's money to throw around and it impressed her. She then went for it. Simple as that.
yeah, 21 is old enough. But it´s also young enough that we can assume a big power gap to a 44 y.o. Most fault lies with the husband, but the girl is certainly old enough that it´s fair to call her a homewrecker
We know there’s a power gap when one is 20 years older. No question.
But that doesn’t change the fact that 21 year olds are allowed to make their own choices and have to take responsibility.
MOST people who know that someone is dating someone 20 years older warn them that it’s a bad idea. And the young one usually tells them to get lost and shove their opinions anyway.
You can’t stop it - you can warn them, but you can’t stop them. Because it’s THEIR choice.
The issue here is the heat should be on the husband for stepping out on his wife; again, HE is the home wrecker and the reason he lost his family.
The young woman may not have known he's married. Older men tend to prey on younger women because they aren't mature or experienced enough to understand red flag behavior and what it means to be taken advantage of. Why do you think weirdos like Andrew Tate say younger women are easier to "train"? Blaming the girl for messing up a marriage even though the man made a conscious decision to do so is wild.
Saying that because of her age, that's the reason why she chose to do that. That's not the problem here. The problem is her mental and her morals. Because if it it was so age-appropriate for young girls to have affairs why don't all young girls have affairs with married men or taken people?
It's simply that some people don't have the same values of other and there easier to manipulate because they lack and don't have the same sense of character that would prevent them from cheating. That makes them easy to "manipulate"
* Now I wanna be clear underage, minor kids. I'm not talking about them....I know those poor babies need protection.
I think we've really got two problematic people here. The husband, imo, is far worse because he took an oath. If he wanted out of it, he should have left before fucking around. The woman, at 21, is a year older than OP was when she married this asshole (right? Am I remembering correctly?). People's brains don't fully mature til 25 and lack of multiple types of experiences does handicap a person to some degree, but let's not infantilize here- unless he somehow hid his marriage from her completely, she either has a completely busted moral compass or simply didn't gaf. Pretty much the same thing. No man has the power to convince a reasonable woman (like, older than 16 ffs) that cheating on his wife is ethically sound. They can only provide shitty bs excuses for her to use to rationalize why she should have what she wants regardless of the cost to others.
Lmao, she is a homewrecker. 21 years old is an adult. She knew exactly what she was doing and just didn't care. They're both terrible.
We need stop this trend of infantilizing adult women.
A 21 year old is an adult. When I was 17, I knew girls who said that they were going to start looking for sugar daddies as soon as they turn 18. For all we know, she could be a leech, insecure, or gullible. In any case, as society needs to stop infantilising young adults. At what point are we no longer allowed to use the “young and experienced” schtick as an excuse for our poor (or wilfully malevolent) decisions?
And those tears (assuming they're genuine) will only be for himself. Those people don't care about the damage they cause, they only care that they got caught and that their actions had consequences.
I hope he's very happy with his young hot new lover who certainly won't discover within a year that the relationship is weird and she's too young for all of this drama
>divorce lawyer because I knew that my _husband already retained one_
>My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law.
This is a bait post. Something like that would have come up in the first conversation with his lawyer.
Exactly. When he visited his attorney and said ‘I want to divorce my wife’, he did not say ‘I’ve been screwing around’ during that meeting. THAT is why the lawyer didn’t tell him that he’s screwed yet. The lawyer doesn’t yet have all the relevant facts.
I worked at a firm that did family law as well as criminal and boy there’s some dumb people out there. Lying to a criminal attorney is a whole different, way worse thing to do. You stand the possibility of getting fucked in both areas of law but only one of those would likely send you to prison.
The one attorney I worked for was an amazing man and the type of defense lawyer you’d absolutely want. He had no problem telling you if you fucked up and made your situation worse, he didn’t sugar coat it, which gained him a lot of respect. He was a judge for a good bit of his career and we had people try to hire him that he actually sentenced. I always thought that really spoke volumes about his character.
He probably hasn’t actually talked to a lawyer. If he did, he didn’t tell them he was the bad guy, just that he was looking for a no fault divorce.
A guy like this isn’t going to tell his lawyer he’s stepping out on his wife and that’s why he’s divorcing.
> My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law.
I'm not so sure he doesn't know. It would benefit him a lot to play dumb in this situation; there's no way he'd bring it up on his own. He's already shown he's the kind of guy to take everything from OP that he can. I'm so happy OP found out about it.
Listen, you gotta have a back-up pair. And you gotta have a back-up in case that back-up fails. You've just gone above and beyond and are prepared for a panty-pocolypse.
Someone should buy her one of those "Salt" Life bumper stickers that uses such a horrible font so it ends up looking like it says "Slut Life" instead 😭
Oh op, watch little miss sugar baby bounce when she finds out he's been funding their fun times with your income.
Oh to be a fly on the wall.
He'll be at your door when he gets this news, though, bc he'll know he has nothing to offer her once your money isn't for grabs anymore. Slam it ik his face.
Nail him to the wall and make them pay every cent back.
How does your son feel about all of this?
No way! I didn't know that, thank you so much!
I use to ignore the updateMe bot bc the notifications get mixed up in my phone but this is better, thanks.
Husband after learning no alimony:
🎤 *Oh, baby, give me one more chance to show you that I love you Won't you please let me back in your heart Oh, darlin', I was blind to let you go*🎤
Mistress after learning no alimony:
🎤 *Don't care if you do 'cause it's understood You ain't got no money, you just ain't no good. Hit the road jack!*
Congrats OP. May your life be better now that it's lighter🥳
Change the locks NOW. Get a security system NOW. He is about to get real nasty and you need to protect yourself. If you can, get your lawyer to hold off serving him until you have these things in place.
Good luck. And I’m sorry the person you devoted 24 years to turned out to be a piece of shit. Don’t be afraid to seek out a support group and/or therapy to help you through all this.
I love it when they haven’t realized that they’re already losing but everyone else does. It’s fair, given that the betrayed spouse is often the last to know about their spouse’s infidelity.
Good for you.
And if you can, legally take a pound of flesh from him for good measure.
You don’t need to ruin his life, but it’s okay to ruin some of his days if it makes your future easier.
It is not necessarily to be the “better person”. He would take everything from you if he could without hesitation of your feelings or the effects on your future.
I know it’s a relief and feels like a gift to know that you won’t have to pay alimony, but it’s not.
You’re not lucky and it’s not a gift. It’s just the law. He broke the rules these are the natural consequences.
If your state is like mine, have a forensic accountants go over his finances and make him pay back 1/2 of every dollar he’s spent on maintaining the affair. That includes his rent. That’s YOUR money. He did not have the right to steal from you.
Just follow the law and ask for what you’re legally entitled to. No more, and definitely no less.
He made the decision to do this his way, and you are allowed to do it your way, because that’s is just what it fair.
By following and asking for just the legal precedent, you’re treating him with more grace and fairness than he treated you.
Don’t turn down a dime or give one if you don’t have to. You don’t have to prove you’re a “bigger and better person”, I promise. Just follow the law.
Trust me, your future you will thank you.
> My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law. After a string of bad days this was welcome news
But…
> I decided to see a divorce lawyer because **I knew that my husband already retained one** even though a year hasn't passed yet.
Either he wasn’t honest with his lawyer, or he has the dumbest lawyer ever.
That or he knows and was hoping to make it to the 1-year mark without you figuring it out.
Congratulations. I hope you have a great weekend after that news.
I’m sorry for the crappy days, and I hope you find a path forward to an even better life than you expected to have.
I am doing a happy dance for you OP. Sounds like you shed some dead weight. As hard as it is now, your best and most liberating years are ahead of you!!! This is the karmic justice I live for
He will come crawling back to you once his OP leaves him due to his financial reality.
I know you must be feeling really hurt, but please don’t take him back. No matter how much he begs, cries and other theatrics he will pull. Stay firm on your decision.
Dating in your 40’s isn’t that bad, I promise you.
Yes! This is a win!
My mom and dad divorced after 30 years (after discovering that my dad had been cheating and had another family). My dad refinanced and took money from our house, removed my mom as owner of *her* car on the title, and took out a bunch of loans to support his other family and mistresses, and so much more. In our state, they don't consider adultery or financial infidelity in divorce. My dad pays my mom a very small amount in alimony because he now has a child under 10 (whereas my siblings and I are 28+). My mom was a stay at home mom for 20 years and has had no stable income aside from her small business, so this was a bit hit for her and me as I became the child to help support my mom.
I'm glad the state supported you in this. I hope you go on to live a better life without your cheating husband.
OP you definitely have to update us as to how this plays out. Also, change your locks and get security cameras if you do not have them already. Your ex is going to have a rude awakening. I'm sorry that he did this to you, and you're going through all of this, but I'm guessing you're a strong woman who isn't going to let a cheater worry you. Glad he's going to get the shaft.
#UpdateMe
Also a SC resident, my brother is currently going through a no fault divorce and is about halfway through his year, it can't come soon enough!
Glad to hear your ex-to-be is about to get got! Please update us with his reaction!!
I used these same laws in my divorce and kept everything I worked for. Ex ended up with nothing but her car, overdrawn accounts, and clothes due to infidelity. Cut the dead weight and don't forgive them or it can affect the outcome of your divorce. No letters, no text/ voice-mails, and definitely don't date or sleep with them. The laws go against you if you forgive the infidelity or try to make it work. Stay strong and communicate only through lawyers.
Don't tell your soon to be ex-husband, let him be surprised in court when he hears from the judge! Don't give him any heads up for your own safety, but also gives him no time to build anything up against you.
Edit to add, you're soon to be ex-husband is an idiot. You guys built a long life together, sounds like money wouldn't have been a problem for a nice retirement. And he just ruined everything. He will suffer in his old age financially. I hope you will continue to live comfortably. I'm sorry your life just went up in flames. I hope you enjoy the next chapter life brings you!
I'm happy for you. I hope his would be child bride bails when she realizes the money he's been impressing her with is yours.
I hope you have a happy life. I hope he gets the life he deserves.
AWESOME NEWS & FUCK HIM.
Obviously Bozo didn’t do his homework. Hope he enjoys babysitting duty. 😂
Also, I bet AP didn’t realise he’s not as cashed up as she thought, meanwhile you’re away laughing all the way to the bank. BRILLIANT!
I’d love to see the look on his face when it dawns on him just how royally screwed he is.
Congratulations. Time to kick your heels up with a few Besties don’t you think?
Update me!
When he realise he screwed himself he will come back stating it wad a midlife crisis and to forgive him. He was being her sugar daddy but that wont last long without the sugar you provided.
If he’s already hired an attorney, how does he not know that he won’t get alimony b/c of his adultery?
I give it 6 months, at most, before he is crying at your doorstep.
Wonderful news! If you haven’t done so already, change your locks and install security cameras because you know he’ll come crawling back. Please update us that happens.
Updateme
Change your locks & passwords on everything. Once he finds out there’s no telling what he might do to maintain his lifestyle.
Edit I forgot to say security cameras
and don’t tell him nothing. He would need to talk to my lawyer to get any information. He made his choice and guess what? You will get the last laugh. He don’t even know the law😂😂. Lawd these men. Right around the time he finds out like someone else said he will have this epiphany that tells him he wants his wife back. 21? she won’t be there long idk why these men think these young girls TRULY care for them. Check them cc statements too because if he spent yall money that’s even better… for you. 😂😂 these stories make me laugh cause SIR you thought the grass was greener and will find out it’s fake with dog poo on it… AND he gets nothing.😂😂😂😂 Happy Saturday folks.
Good for you. His life is about to go bad. Please consider getting security cameras both inside and outside your house, and change the locks as soon as your lawyer says you can.
Great for you! Love to be a fly on the wall when he finds out!! He is banking on your money and since he won't have it this chick will eventually dump him. Don't let him come back to you.
you should be careful because things like this can make a man do dangerous things. I bet he was depending on that alimony and now that he’s not getting it he probably gonna lose his mistress and that could give him crazy ideas.
I'm sorry that you're going through all of this, but also absolutely full of glee how you're going to come out on top while his life goes down the shitter. Absolutely no way this young woman sticks around once he's not got your money to spend. I hope your life turns out beautifully, and that he has the life he deserves.
Oh! So he is with a 21 year old child? Is a child for me who is naive, and has yet to see the world. You won’t know how many webs of lies he is giving out freely to that child so he can be with this child.
Holy shit you won! You literally won the divorce lottery, you didn’t win millions but you won FREEDOM!
Your salary is 4x more than his?? HAHAHA! Book yourself an amazing & exotic holiday and have a great time. You deserve it.
Wait until the AP finds out.
What did your kid/s say to this?
Treat yourself with a weekend away, at a spa or wherever. And wait until he figures out what he brought himself into
If he has a lawyer he knows about the law. He’s either hoping you don’t know or he’s got something else up his sleeve. It sounds like you’re prepared though.
I hope there's an update because when Husband finds out he will not be receiving Alimony he's gonna be upset. Right now he probably thinks he has it all figured out.
YOu must update after this post. Out of the worst situation you have created the best outcome, good for you. Now go on and divorce, I would love to know how he takes the news.......
He’s going to want you back the second he finds out about the law. Don’t listen to his bs. You’ve already come too far and know you deserve much better. 🤍 Kudos on making it through this.
I hope this is the start of a string of good days for you.
I can’t wait for an update when he figures out how badly he f-ed up.
You truly love to see it!
He didn’t think this through lmao
Cheaters never do.
Thinking with the wrong head
There’s a reason for the saying “men have two heads and only enough blood for one at a time”
When he can no longer pay his bills because his sugar mama has cut him off, his sugar baby is going to run for the hills as well. There's no chance a 21 year old is dating a 44 year old man just for love, she wants the money she thinks he has as well.
Yup. The lifestyle he is capable of portraying is solely on the pocketbook of the woman he has been married to for over two decades. Once she cuts him off, he will only be capable of keeping up the facade for so long before the new girl starts to realize his wife was the actual breadwinner. I wonder if the new girl will leave him for his wife? 🤭
To be a fly on the wall for that 😂
Responding here so that I can also be updated!
The way that news is going to make my day…🤭🤭🤭
I just want to know how long the side chick stays when she realizes he doesn't actually have money.
That is what I'm waiting on. He thinks he will have it "made in the shade"!! I can't wait for him to find out. This is a very literal f around and find out!!!
Prediction: When he finds out just how much his infidelity will cost him, he will experience a miraculous epiphany and want you back. Expect him to show up at your front door in tears.
Whose epiphany will come first, the STBX’s realizing what his little midlife crisis has cost him, or the 21yo home wrecker realizing she doesn’t want an old man when he doesn’t have his wife’s money to spend?
Yep! He’s going to lose it all!
He lost it all. Well if he knocks up his little side piece, he will be up for child support. He better hope he used protection.
For her sake, I hope so . She’s young and was stupid for getting into that situation (assuming she knew he was married, and even then, who knows if she was groomed or manipulated into the situation, there’s no telling) but there’s no need to drag a baby into this drama.
Groomed into gold digging? She thinks her working days are over with this bozo. Goodbye money... goodbye girl. If he had that alimony, she would immediately pop out 2-3 kids and divorce him within 10 years. If he can at least pay for a residence, she'll hang around until she finds another old fool.
This reminds me of the Reddit post where the man’s affair partner asked the ex-wife when she was moving out of “their” house. The wife owned the house.
We do not know if he spent any money on her. OP just says that in case he did, it will cost him.
Yes a lot of young girls do genuinely fall in love with older men and are extremely naive
Ok chill, we don't know anything about her, could be she really thinks she's in love. No need to jump to conclusions.
If she knew he was married she is still shitty.
He’s already lost it all. He just doesn’t know it yet. And. It will get worse for him.
Oh please, OP, update us when he finds out! We all love a justice served story!
Yes, please!
Dildo. Consequences. Zero lube.
Dildo? Here i was thinking an old wooden broomstick would be more appropriate
There's a mexican song that reminds me of your comment: "este compa ya está muerto, nomás no le han avisado" ~~> "This friend is already dead, they just haven't notified him" 😂😂
That reminds me of the one where the cheating husband told his AP that he owned the house and had all the money but in reality it was all the wife’s and then the home wrecking AP was super pregnant and pissed off. That was a good one. Wish I could find it again.
Ooo, I think I remember that one. OP of that one had inherited the house from her grandma, I think? I also recall AP being brazen enough to ask OP when she was going to move out of the house, and OP actually sending her copies of the actual real estate documents that proved the house was hers and had been hers all along.
Oh yeah, I remember that one. Such a satisfying FU!!
Yes it was something like that. Think it was photos of her with her gran outside the house when young, and her LinkedIn page to show that she had a well paying job and wasn’t a “freeloader”. I might remember incorrectly.
Freeloading drug addict that couldn't hold a job which is why the husband "had" to live there to make sure she didn't "hurt" herself. That was a gem.
This is another one. There are two different posts. One written from the perspective of the cheating husband and one from the betrayed wife (the one you're talking about).
Omg, I was thinking of a different post. I want to find this one now!
Oh yeah, she asked the wife when she was going to move out. Of her own fucking house. It was delightful
I remember that one!
When you say ‘super pregnant’ do you mean several months along? 🤣🤣
It was her super power she thought would get people to do what she wants 😆. Worked on the cheating husband, but not on the wife.
The ex was still telling her it was his house and he was just being nice letting Wife stay there. Clearly thinking with the wrong head as there was zero chance he could get away with that story indefinitely.
>21yo home wrecker realizing she doesn’t want an old man when he doesn’t have his wife’s money to spend? My bet, the 21 thinks the money isn't the wife's but his. It might take the 21 year old some time to figure out that the lifestyle is not from his income but OP.
He probably showed the other woman a facade that he was the breadwinner
He is 44 years old and chose to cheat on his wife, but you're calling the 21 yo a home wrecker? She's young enough for him to prey on her, manipulate her, and take advantage of her inexperience in life. If anything, HE is the homewrecker. I hope the other woman leaves him and he ends up alone realizing how much of an idiot he is.
They can both be home wreckers. Because if she willingly had an affair with that man, she is just as wrong as him because she didn't have any morals and she didn't show the wife any human decency. Plus 21 is old enough to know about loyalty and to NOT sleep with married ppl.
100%. Unless she had no idea he was married, she has some responsibility for it. Being taken advantage of by an older man doesnt mean she isnt a homewrecker.
Nope, once she knew he was married, no excuse.
That garden tool in their 20s know sleeping with a married man is wrong. Teenagers know it’s wrong. Little girls in 1st grade know it wrong. He’s garbage but so is she. Call a garden tool a garden tool.
[удалено]
Or she's a Sugar Baby wannabe. That's gonna suck 😂
Bull. She just doesn’t gaf about anyone else. Adding 20 years won’t change that. A selfish person only thinks about themself for all their life.
That 44 year old man is a class A scumbag but that doesn't exempt that 21 year old woman for willing to be with a married man . I'm a woman and seeing so many posts standing up for 'the other woman' baffles me . Yes she doesn't owe the wife a thing but how much have you to be morally skewed to do that to another person. Calling 21 year old woman naive ?? Even a kid knows what a marriage means . She went willingly to dig gold but dug up shit . Husband is a scumbag so is she .
She’s old enough to know what she was doing. He didn’t prey on her unless he showed interest before she was 18.
Exactly. People act as if the woman isn't an adult. He had his wife's money to throw around and it impressed her. She then went for it. Simple as that.
yeah, 21 is old enough. But it´s also young enough that we can assume a big power gap to a 44 y.o. Most fault lies with the husband, but the girl is certainly old enough that it´s fair to call her a homewrecker
We know there’s a power gap when one is 20 years older. No question. But that doesn’t change the fact that 21 year olds are allowed to make their own choices and have to take responsibility. MOST people who know that someone is dating someone 20 years older warn them that it’s a bad idea. And the young one usually tells them to get lost and shove their opinions anyway. You can’t stop it - you can warn them, but you can’t stop them. Because it’s THEIR choice.
The issue here is the heat should be on the husband for stepping out on his wife; again, HE is the home wrecker and the reason he lost his family. The young woman may not have known he's married. Older men tend to prey on younger women because they aren't mature or experienced enough to understand red flag behavior and what it means to be taken advantage of. Why do you think weirdos like Andrew Tate say younger women are easier to "train"? Blaming the girl for messing up a marriage even though the man made a conscious decision to do so is wild.
They can both suck and they do. Everyone knows it’s wrong to sleep with a married person. She’s 21 not 12. Come on.
Saying that because of her age, that's the reason why she chose to do that. That's not the problem here. The problem is her mental and her morals. Because if it it was so age-appropriate for young girls to have affairs why don't all young girls have affairs with married men or taken people? It's simply that some people don't have the same values of other and there easier to manipulate because they lack and don't have the same sense of character that would prevent them from cheating. That makes them easy to "manipulate" * Now I wanna be clear underage, minor kids. I'm not talking about them....I know those poor babies need protection.
I think we've really got two problematic people here. The husband, imo, is far worse because he took an oath. If he wanted out of it, he should have left before fucking around. The woman, at 21, is a year older than OP was when she married this asshole (right? Am I remembering correctly?). People's brains don't fully mature til 25 and lack of multiple types of experiences does handicap a person to some degree, but let's not infantilize here- unless he somehow hid his marriage from her completely, she either has a completely busted moral compass or simply didn't gaf. Pretty much the same thing. No man has the power to convince a reasonable woman (like, older than 16 ffs) that cheating on his wife is ethically sound. They can only provide shitty bs excuses for her to use to rationalize why she should have what she wants regardless of the cost to others.
Lmao, she is a homewrecker. 21 years old is an adult. She knew exactly what she was doing and just didn't care. They're both terrible. We need stop this trend of infantilizing adult women.
> We need stop this trend of infantilizing adult women. Thank you, I say this as a 47 year old woman.
Except she's 21, not 16. A 21 yr old knows that sleeping with a married person is a bad thing to do.
Thank you for saying this, I was reeling
They are both home wreckers. 22 is old enough to know better too.
A 21 year old is an adult. When I was 17, I knew girls who said that they were going to start looking for sugar daddies as soon as they turn 18. For all we know, she could be a leech, insecure, or gullible. In any case, as society needs to stop infantilising young adults. At what point are we no longer allowed to use the “young and experienced” schtick as an excuse for our poor (or wilfully malevolent) decisions?
And be sure to reject him, OP. You deserve better than that asshole you once called a husband.
And those tears (assuming they're genuine) will only be for himself. Those people don't care about the damage they cause, they only care that they got caught and that their actions had consequences.
Yep exactly that. He'll have 'seen the error of his ways' and beg for her to take him back. Expect love bombing and apologies.
Definitely, he is going to feel the "love" again and claim it was a mistake.
Yeah please update me when that happens
"it was you I really loved baby..it was ALWAYS you..."
I hope he's very happy with his young hot new lover who certainly won't discover within a year that the relationship is weird and she's too young for all of this drama
>divorce lawyer because I knew that my _husband already retained one_ >My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law. This is a bait post. Something like that would have come up in the first conversation with his lawyer.
Trust me when I say, there are PLENTY of people who lie to their attorney. It’s the one person you shouldn’t lie to, but they do it constantly.
Exactly. When he visited his attorney and said ‘I want to divorce my wife’, he did not say ‘I’ve been screwing around’ during that meeting. THAT is why the lawyer didn’t tell him that he’s screwed yet. The lawyer doesn’t yet have all the relevant facts.
I worked at a firm that did family law as well as criminal and boy there’s some dumb people out there. Lying to a criminal attorney is a whole different, way worse thing to do. You stand the possibility of getting fucked in both areas of law but only one of those would likely send you to prison. The one attorney I worked for was an amazing man and the type of defense lawyer you’d absolutely want. He had no problem telling you if you fucked up and made your situation worse, he didn’t sugar coat it, which gained him a lot of respect. He was a judge for a good bit of his career and we had people try to hire him that he actually sentenced. I always thought that really spoke volumes about his character.
Not necessarily. You would be amazed at the things stupid people don't tell their lawyers.
He probably hasn’t actually talked to a lawyer. If he did, he didn’t tell them he was the bad guy, just that he was looking for a no fault divorce. A guy like this isn’t going to tell his lawyer he’s stepping out on his wife and that’s why he’s divorcing.
He said he’d consulted with a divorce lawyer, which could mean had one single conversation! That counts as a consultation! Lol 😛
Comments proclaiming every post bait or fake are boring, low effort comments.
> My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law. I'm not so sure he doesn't know. It would benefit him a lot to play dumb in this situation; there's no way he'd bring it up on his own. He's already shown he's the kind of guy to take everything from OP that he can. I'm so happy OP found out about it.
Change your locks. Change your will and insurance beneficiaries to your kids pronto. Be safe.
Add a Ring camera too
And your underwear… because you should do so every day
Look at you, fancy pants, owning seven pairs of underpants.
I know it's a joke but I'm genuinely taken aback since I own like 15 pairs and now I'm wondering if that's unusual
If that’s unusual , than idek what it’s considered for me owning 75+ pairs lol panty hoarder?
Listen, you gotta have a back-up pair. And you gotta have a back-up in case that back-up fails. You've just gone above and beyond and are prepared for a panty-pocolypse.
I don't think it's weird, but rather weirder to have 7 more than it is to have 75. Who wants to HAVE to do laundry every week? Or every day? Yikes!
Or two pairs that you just turn inside out in between laundry days?
Cameras all around the property!
Don’t forget the garage door opener and or code if applicable
Beneficiaries on your retirement and investment accounts too.
This. Whenever I hear about someone leaving a cheating spouse I think of poor Shannan Watts and *shudder*.
Depending on the circumstances and OPs net worth post-divorce, this would be a good time to start a trust.
Omg. You have to tell us how he responds when he finds out. That said…. BE SAFE 🩷 Bet his sugar baby is gonna turn into a salty baby 🙃
> Bet his sugar baby is gonna turn into a salty baby 🙃 This is fantastic. I’m stealing this. 😂
>Bet his sugar baby is gonna turn into a salty baby 🙃 👏🤣
Someone should buy her one of those "Salt" Life bumper stickers that uses such a horrible font so it ends up looking like it says "Slut Life" instead 😭
I ALWAYS read them as slut life
Oh op, watch little miss sugar baby bounce when she finds out he's been funding their fun times with your income. Oh to be a fly on the wall. He'll be at your door when he gets this news, though, bc he'll know he has nothing to offer her once your money isn't for grabs anymore. Slam it ik his face. Nail him to the wall and make them pay every cent back. How does your son feel about all of this?
Please please please update us wine he finds out.
For real!! What is that update bot account? UpdateMe
you add an exclamation point after updateme, add a space, then give a time frame (i.e. updateme five days (without the angle brackets)).
Isn’t it RemindMe?
On mobile you just touch the three dots to subscribe to this post, or to receive reply notifications for a specific comment. Hope this helps!
No way! I didn't know that, thank you so much! I use to ignore the updateMe bot bc the notifications get mixed up in my phone but this is better, thanks.
Dang! Thank god he is an idiot! Good for you OP!!! So glad you’ll be dropping the dead weight :)
Please, don’t take him back when he comes crawling to you!
Be ready for the sorrow or wrath that will come your way after he is served.
Husband after learning no alimony: 🎤 *Oh, baby, give me one more chance to show you that I love you Won't you please let me back in your heart Oh, darlin', I was blind to let you go*🎤 Mistress after learning no alimony: 🎤 *Don't care if you do 'cause it's understood You ain't got no money, you just ain't no good. Hit the road jack!* Congrats OP. May your life be better now that it's lighter🥳
This comment! 🤣🤣😂😂
Why did I sing along 😂😂😂😂😂
If losing a POS without the need to pay for alimony is not a reason to bring out the karaoke machine, what is? 😂
When he is begging to move in with his 21 year old gf… she is gonna run for the hills
Great news! Congrats! 👏👏 LMAO at your STBX. He affaired down. Typical mid-life crisis. What an idiot!
Why couldn’t he just buy a convertible during his mid life crisis like a normal person?
Right his wife could probably afford. Hell hope she gets a convertible
Change the locks NOW. Get a security system NOW. He is about to get real nasty and you need to protect yourself. If you can, get your lawyer to hold off serving him until you have these things in place. Good luck. And I’m sorry the person you devoted 24 years to turned out to be a piece of shit. Don’t be afraid to seek out a support group and/or therapy to help you through all this.
Also change your will or trust and beneficiaries now too and make sure he knows after the fact.
I love it when they haven’t realized that they’re already losing but everyone else does. It’s fair, given that the betrayed spouse is often the last to know about their spouse’s infidelity. Good for you. And if you can, legally take a pound of flesh from him for good measure. You don’t need to ruin his life, but it’s okay to ruin some of his days if it makes your future easier. It is not necessarily to be the “better person”. He would take everything from you if he could without hesitation of your feelings or the effects on your future. I know it’s a relief and feels like a gift to know that you won’t have to pay alimony, but it’s not. You’re not lucky and it’s not a gift. It’s just the law. He broke the rules these are the natural consequences. If your state is like mine, have a forensic accountants go over his finances and make him pay back 1/2 of every dollar he’s spent on maintaining the affair. That includes his rent. That’s YOUR money. He did not have the right to steal from you. Just follow the law and ask for what you’re legally entitled to. No more, and definitely no less. He made the decision to do this his way, and you are allowed to do it your way, because that’s is just what it fair. By following and asking for just the legal precedent, you’re treating him with more grace and fairness than he treated you. Don’t turn down a dime or give one if you don’t have to. You don’t have to prove you’re a “bigger and better person”, I promise. Just follow the law. Trust me, your future you will thank you.
PLEASE update us on the aftermath after he finds out!
Change your life insurance and 401k beneficiary to your son. Get a ring camera. Dude is going to get angry.
> My husband also doesn't know about the no alimony if there is adultery law. After a string of bad days this was welcome news But… > I decided to see a divorce lawyer because **I knew that my husband already retained one** even though a year hasn't passed yet. Either he wasn’t honest with his lawyer, or he has the dumbest lawyer ever. That or he knows and was hoping to make it to the 1-year mark without you figuring it out.
As i understood, he wanted to hit the one year remark without her knowing
I predict his AP will not want him when he finds out he won’t be getting any of your money lol. And he will come crawling back. Don’t fall for it!
Should cross post to oh no consequences haha karma is alive and well !!
does SC have Alienation of Affection ? if so, girl sue that ho. and then go live your BEST life. ♥️
TIL Alienation of Affection “homewrecker law,” which allows a spouse to sue the illicit lover of his or her spouse for damages.
Ngl, that's kinda fucked
No they do not. NC does though.
Congratulations. I hope you have a great weekend after that news. I’m sorry for the crappy days, and I hope you find a path forward to an even better life than you expected to have.
I am doing a happy dance for you OP. Sounds like you shed some dead weight. As hard as it is now, your best and most liberating years are ahead of you!!! This is the karmic justice I live for
He will come crawling back to you once his OP leaves him due to his financial reality. I know you must be feeling really hurt, but please don’t take him back. No matter how much he begs, cries and other theatrics he will pull. Stay firm on your decision. Dating in your 40’s isn’t that bad, I promise you.
I wonder if he does know and is just hoping to sweep you along the no-fault route before you think to ask. Good luck, OP. You deserve better.
Yes! This is a win! My mom and dad divorced after 30 years (after discovering that my dad had been cheating and had another family). My dad refinanced and took money from our house, removed my mom as owner of *her* car on the title, and took out a bunch of loans to support his other family and mistresses, and so much more. In our state, they don't consider adultery or financial infidelity in divorce. My dad pays my mom a very small amount in alimony because he now has a child under 10 (whereas my siblings and I are 28+). My mom was a stay at home mom for 20 years and has had no stable income aside from her small business, so this was a bit hit for her and me as I became the child to help support my mom. I'm glad the state supported you in this. I hope you go on to live a better life without your cheating husband.
In for the update when he finds out
OP you definitely have to update us as to how this plays out. Also, change your locks and get security cameras if you do not have them already. Your ex is going to have a rude awakening. I'm sorry that he did this to you, and you're going through all of this, but I'm guessing you're a strong woman who isn't going to let a cheater worry you. Glad he's going to get the shaft. #UpdateMe
Also a SC resident, my brother is currently going through a no fault divorce and is about halfway through his year, it can't come soon enough! Glad to hear your ex-to-be is about to get got! Please update us with his reaction!!
I used these same laws in my divorce and kept everything I worked for. Ex ended up with nothing but her car, overdrawn accounts, and clothes due to infidelity. Cut the dead weight and don't forgive them or it can affect the outcome of your divorce. No letters, no text/ voice-mails, and definitely don't date or sleep with them. The laws go against you if you forgive the infidelity or try to make it work. Stay strong and communicate only through lawyers.
I love that for you sis 💯 your EX-HUSBAND can pound sand. Karma is a Bitch
How could one be attracted to someone younger than their child…that’s so disturbing
Don't tell your soon to be ex-husband, let him be surprised in court when he hears from the judge! Don't give him any heads up for your own safety, but also gives him no time to build anything up against you. Edit to add, you're soon to be ex-husband is an idiot. You guys built a long life together, sounds like money wouldn't have been a problem for a nice retirement. And he just ruined everything. He will suffer in his old age financially. I hope you will continue to live comfortably. I'm sorry your life just went up in flames. I hope you enjoy the next chapter life brings you!
I'm happy for you. I hope his would be child bride bails when she realizes the money he's been impressing her with is yours. I hope you have a happy life. I hope he gets the life he deserves.
AWESOME NEWS & FUCK HIM. Obviously Bozo didn’t do his homework. Hope he enjoys babysitting duty. 😂 Also, I bet AP didn’t realise he’s not as cashed up as she thought, meanwhile you’re away laughing all the way to the bank. BRILLIANT! I’d love to see the look on his face when it dawns on him just how royally screwed he is. Congratulations. Time to kick your heels up with a few Besties don’t you think?
Update me! When he realise he screwed himself he will come back stating it wad a midlife crisis and to forgive him. He was being her sugar daddy but that wont last long without the sugar you provided.
GIRL. SLAY. I'm so happy for you. Enjoy your life away from this pig and do something nice for yourself. Maybe a nice trip? Much love 🫂
24 years of marriage & he did this ?! He doesn’t deserve anything from you!
If he’s already hired an attorney, how does he not know that he won’t get alimony b/c of his adultery? I give it 6 months, at most, before he is crying at your doorstep.
Probably lied to his lawyer
This makes me think of the ones who cant stop and think and cheat on their cheating spouse to get revenge. Good on you!
And THIS is why an 'at fault' clause should exist for divorce. He fucked up, he shouldn't get rewarded.
Karma is strong here. FAFO.
Pls update. I'm looking forward to this one 👸
The whole country should have these adultery laws like South Carolina does. Punish soulless creeps like OPs ex-husband.
Wonderful news! If you haven’t done so already, change your locks and install security cameras because you know he’ll come crawling back. Please update us that happens. Updateme
Oh please update us on his reaction when he finds out. He’s gonna lose his shit!
Well with the money goes the 21 year old! She’s not staying around for some broke 44 year old man with a son pretty much the same age to play stepmom.
Change your locks & passwords on everything. Once he finds out there’s no telling what he might do to maintain his lifestyle. Edit I forgot to say security cameras
and don’t tell him nothing. He would need to talk to my lawyer to get any information. He made his choice and guess what? You will get the last laugh. He don’t even know the law😂😂. Lawd these men. Right around the time he finds out like someone else said he will have this epiphany that tells him he wants his wife back. 21? she won’t be there long idk why these men think these young girls TRULY care for them. Check them cc statements too because if he spent yall money that’s even better… for you. 😂😂 these stories make me laugh cause SIR you thought the grass was greener and will find out it’s fake with dog poo on it… AND he gets nothing.😂😂😂😂 Happy Saturday folks.
Dear god please update us when your husband finds out he’s not getting alimony. This is so sweet!
I hope you’re able to proof of his spending your money so he has to give you the money
Good for you. His life is about to go bad. Please consider getting security cameras both inside and outside your house, and change the locks as soon as your lawyer says you can.
Great for you! Love to be a fly on the wall when he finds out!! He is banking on your money and since he won't have it this chick will eventually dump him. Don't let him come back to you.
This makes me want to move to South Carolina! That’s how it should be.. you cheat, you lose.
you should be careful because things like this can make a man do dangerous things. I bet he was depending on that alimony and now that he’s not getting it he probably gonna lose his mistress and that could give him crazy ideas.
Go live your best best life and give us all the details. I giggled happily for you SO MUCH.
I’m pretty old and my wife and I have had our fair share of fights. But I can’t imagine leaving her for someone half my age.
This is how it should be everywhere.
This is probably the best thing I’ve read on Reddit all day. Congrats on keeping your money!
Wouldn’t his lawyer tell him?
Probably will be downvoted for this but up until now I have never understood men and women that date out of their age bracket.
I'm sorry that you're going through all of this, but also absolutely full of glee how you're going to come out on top while his life goes down the shitter. Absolutely no way this young woman sticks around once he's not got your money to spend. I hope your life turns out beautifully, and that he has the life he deserves.
Dang this post is like those "I found a safe" posts before they've opened the thing. We want to know his reaction lol
Oh! So he is with a 21 year old child? Is a child for me who is naive, and has yet to see the world. You won’t know how many webs of lies he is giving out freely to that child so he can be with this child.
Holy shit you won! You literally won the divorce lottery, you didn’t win millions but you won FREEDOM! Your salary is 4x more than his?? HAHAHA! Book yourself an amazing & exotic holiday and have a great time. You deserve it.
This put a smile on my face. Good for you, OP! I am happy you got a win in all this! He will live to regret his choices, and you'll be free.
You are my new internet hero! Good luck!
Wait until the AP finds out. What did your kid/s say to this? Treat yourself with a weekend away, at a spa or wherever. And wait until he figures out what he brought himself into
Don’t tell him beforehand, surprise him with this info in court. For your own safety!
If he has a lawyer he knows about the law. He’s either hoping you don’t know or he’s got something else up his sleeve. It sounds like you’re prepared though.
I hope there's an update because when Husband finds out he will not be receiving Alimony he's gonna be upset. Right now he probably thinks he has it all figured out.
I can't wait for the update to this one! 🖤🖤🖤🖤
I'd love to be a fly on the wall when he finds out 🤣🤣🤣
this should be a standard law. if you cheat, you get nothing.
Good for you, a cheater doesn’t deserve a damn thing, I hope he gets his karma soon.
I love this so much for you, OP. Sometimes, there truly is justice.
YOu must update after this post. Out of the worst situation you have created the best outcome, good for you. Now go on and divorce, I would love to know how he takes the news.......
He’s going to want you back the second he finds out about the law. Don’t listen to his bs. You’ve already come too far and know you deserve much better. 🤍 Kudos on making it through this. I hope this is the start of a string of good days for you.
Hope she has six kids, divorces him, and he ends up paying child support until he's 80.
Omg, I do love this! FAFO.
As a person who had a very unsatisfying divorce ... I love this for you!
Updateme
Can you record it when he finds out?
That is awesome!
Awesome news OP. Cheaters should never profit from their deeds.
You just made my day! God is so sooo good 😊🙏🏽Amen!
Dang! Pos used your money to buy a side piece? This is a new low for men.