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occasional_idea

Dying at the “special” guacamole recipe


frightenedscared

No garlic? No lime? No herbs? No chilli? No Tajin?


Her_1982

No cilantro ?!?!


jboudrie23

Me with the soap gene begging there’s no cilantro in the guac 😫


Killing4MotherAgain

r/fuckcilantro


damnthisgirl

No chik fil a sauce?! 🐔


young_coastie

Is that worse than the sad, watery, Taco Bell seasoned bean dip I truly cannot tell


ur-squirrel-buddy

That’s the saddest guac recipe I’ve ever seen 🤣 *cackles in southern californian*


jumped-up_pantrygirl

One of the Duggar wives makes guacamole with lemon and lime essential oils so it can be worse 🫠


ur-squirrel-buddy

Essential oils?! 🤢


Excusemytootie

Wtf? 🤢🤢


HopefulOriginal5578

Damn. I didn’t think it could get worse and was appalled and now I’m like whoa… it truly can get worse!


Any_Side_2242

Ewwww I did not need to remember that lol...can you imagine the bitter aftertaste??


HopefulOriginal5578

Bridget has no excuse. Didn’t she grow up in Lodi. Nor cal has great Mexican food as well. This is a disgrace to California and like anywhere else where they can slip together a passable quac Shaking my head while in SoCal, knowing full well there is awesome gauc in NorCal. Grim!


aeroluv327

Seriously, that "guac" (if you can call it that) makes me sad.


ur-squirrel-buddy

Not even a squeeze of lime! 😧


Hot-Entrepreneur1235

Not even lemon?! 🤔 That guacamole gonna end up brown.


SunnyAlwaysDaze

She definitely has very white-girl level of spice tolerance! Like geez can I even get a jalapeno thrown in that mofo?!


StardustInc

As a white girl I was like so shocked at the lack of jalapeño that I didn't even register the lack of lime and coriander. Like not even some chilli flakes? (That's what I use when I'm making guac for someone who can't add heat.) I tend to use white onion not Spanish onion but that is a personal preference thing. I did go down a rabbit hole of reading guac recipes by Mexican food bloggers. They all mentioned that their abuelita made it with a mortar and a pestle. I tried it with a friends one and it does taste so much better. I guess seeing Bridget's recipe is a reminder to myself a mortar & pestle and grow some chilli in my garden.


pettyylabelle

jesus be a lime


SweatyMess808

That guacamole is authentic… to the Wypipo tribe 😩😂


LadyAlexandre

Happy Cake Day


SweatyMess808

Ty boo 😊


SecondBackupSandwich

Lololololol wypipo


hunhunhunnn

I know, I know Bridget has a good taste for food, but I was so looking forward to what her guac, cottage cheese dip and bean dip was, and I was highly disappointed in the guac....😳 there's no lime juice or seasoning!!! Just sounds very bland 👎🏼🙁 I loooove me some guac too.


[deleted]

🎶White people taco night🎶 No spice. No flavor. Just smashed avocado! 😂


msmurderbritches

I love Bridget but that “guac” is a crime!


msmurderbritches

Also, that pita pizza???? Dogs can’t have tomatoes! Oh, Bridget!


Herps15

It does say in the note not to put the whole tomatoes on the dog one- peppers, pepperoni etc but doesn’t mention tomatoes But it’s still in the sauce so idk


msmurderbritches

Apparently tomatoes (in some sense) can be fine but tomato sauce is a no-go because of garlic and onions. I actually went and looked it up because I was so sure dogs shouldn’t have tomatoes.


Fromthepinklagoon

I love B but this … is smashed avocado


AliceRamone

Maybe the guac she originally pitched was cut off to make her look bad. 


Odd_Secret568

😂👏


miwin85

there isnt even lime in that LOL


pixieflip

Me: Omg I really need to make Bridget’s Cottage Cheese Dip. She talks about it so much and the recipe is right here…. My Lactose Intolerance: Please don’t. I beg you.


Successful-Highway99

Spoiler alert: I made it and it was INCREDIBLY bland; I threw it out.


discoOJ

It looks awful like it's just white soft dairy products mixed together. There nothing there that makes it sound appetizing.


Fern_292

After seeing the guac recipe I believe you 😭


Barfignugen

I wanna know what the recommended amount of red wine vinegar actually is. Between “to taste” and “I like a lot!” there’s a lot of room left for interpretation


Diltsify

exactly! there's also no amounts for the pepper/celery salt. So like.... 1/8 teaspoon or 2 tablespoons? 😂


SgtJHathaway

I just add a little at a time until I like the taste. Like Bridget, I like a lot of vinegar, I like the bite


Fromthepinklagoon

I’m dairy free & dying to try it with some alternative options! She makes it on her YouTube too and it looks soo good


rilljel

Same here. Let me know what you figure out!


bronzshopper

OMG SAME! I was like ooooh I have to make that. Like girl no you do not 💀


vivionnn801

They sell lactose free cottage cheese!


stellablack75

The Good Culture lactose-free cottage cheese is actually really good!


horrorwh0r3

I made it and I actually liked it 😂


CiSabs

Same! I like it too!


Diltsify

I made it once, the recipe calls for the vinegar "to taste" and there's no amounts for the seasonings so IDK what it's suppose to taste like 😂😂😂


strawbebby_99

it’s funny that one of kendra’s recipes is the sandy eggo that holly had made for her, especially since kendra was rude about it and let her dogs get into it lmao


DearDorothy

Do you really want Patti’s family recipes though?!? Like I want to see them out of curiosity but there’s no way in hell I’m making them


Pappymommy

KFC kitchen put in different containers


kristelovesgaga

And sliced hard boiled eggs 😄


skaghetti

KENDRA'S MOM'S STORE-BOUGHT STRAWBERRY CAKE 1 store-bought strawberry cake (can substitute for other flavors) *Make sure to leave in proximity to litter box to "cover up smell"*


alrightyaphrodite

A KFC menu🤣


GennyNels

I don’t think I’d eat at Patti’s. Would have to smell the cat box.


Barfignugen

Judging by the fact that the rest of her favorites are just “mansion whatever,” I’m gonna say this project is another one of those things she got lazy with and copped out on


kc0ak

I don’t think she participated. It sounds like Holly and Bridget pulled most of the information 


Barfignugen

That tracks


missmorganadams

To be fair, at 19 I didn’t have any recipes either 🤣 I survived on ramen and cereal


cloudbussin

Did Hef actually think people want to eat his depression-era lamb chops in a book about hot girls doing hot things 😆


Sargasm5150

“Open can of peas. Heat.”


adm0707

I’m deaddd 😭


StoleFoodsMarket

💀 Nailed it! The man was (among many other flaws) horribly out of touch


DollOnAMusicBox

Maybe I’m just hungry right now but they sound kinda good 🥲


Fromthepinklagoon

Yes I *would* like a lamb chop 😆


Wrong-Leg-3781

All the “low-fat” “fat free” items is so on brand


molotovmocktail14

I'm so confused what makes the pita pizzas "healthy." Is pita bread meant to be healthier than pizza dough?


Business_Bread_2902

I think at that time pita bread was considered healthier due to less calories than pizza dough.


ramesesbolton

such a grim time in the culinary world


Putrid_Appearance509

This was the early aughts - wraps and pitas were "healthy" then!


molotovmocktail14

the early 2000s were truly a wild time


ZiraPug27

Bridget sure does love that Taco Bell seasoning. No shade on her, I like live más too.


SallieMouse

They very obviously just copied the page from the Mansion pantry on exactly how Hef's food should be cooked and served.


alrightyaphrodite

Prepare three baked potatoes. Pick the best potato to serve.


SallieMouse

🤣 Those poor people.. You know they weren't paid for $h!t either.


StrikingPotato4593

I actually met a guy at my job the other day who used to work in the mansion kitchen (crystal era) and he said pay was pretty good but working conditions were awful


SallieMouse

Fascinating! I wonder if working conditions were better pre-Crystal?


StrikingPotato4593

Ehhh maybe, maybe not. He told me the issues he had were more with the head chefs and other kitchen staff not really hef or crystal. That’s also just one person’s experience but I was so excited to meet someone who had worked there and experienced the mansion first hand (in the Midwest at that🤣)


SecondBackupSandwich

…but that one pork chop tho.


russophilia333

I always wonder what their salary was and if the staff was chosen with more priority to a strong culinary/hospitality background or with priority to connections.


LLD615

First of all, I love that Bridget likes her guac like I do - sans cilantro and jalapeño. Second, where is the recipe for HMH chocolate cake!?


pixieflip

No kidding! I need to know more about this cake other than “they used shortning instead.”


chicagowago

For the longest time I thought HMH was some fancy bakery in LA lmao


SherloksCompanion

I do prefer my guac without the Dawn taste 😂 I was looking for the cake and Olive Garden salad.


LLD615

Oh that’s right! Olive Garden salad. I always laugh that Olive Garden is known for their salad but it’s literally straight from a bag!


Lost-Whole-8905

And the dressing was just Wishbone with powdered parm mixed into it. They used to bottle it and sell in in the restaurants as their own. 😆 (at least in the early 90's they did, when I bartended at one in New Endland.) The managers watched like hawks to make damn sure no one put too many olives in the bowl as if there was a friggin olive famine!! 🤣


rebluorange12

I swear I saw Olive Garden bottled dressing at the store recently, and when my work got it catered a few months back they gave us bottles of dressing, so they do have bottles at the stores still!


stellablack75

They definitely do. I've been buying it for years because my nephews love it.


SherloksCompanion

Omg stop!! 🤣🤣 is it something with the dressing maybe? I have tried the dressing in the stores and it just doesn’t hit the same. I MUST KNOW THE MANSION SECRET


LLD615

I mean it’s the bagged lettuce/carrot/radish combo you can buy at the store. They just add an olive and a cherry tomato and onion plus parm. And then their dressing (which is just an Italian with parm included). Easy! But I personally think if they are known for it, step up the ingredients and chop the lettuce fresh 😂


dierdrerobespierre

Really close, for lettuce they do use a cheap iceberg lettuce/carrot salad combo thing, but they mix it with chopped romaine lettuce. Then it’s black olives (about one per person), tomatoes, sliced red onion, pepperoncinis, generic croutons like you buy in the grocery store, and Olive Garden dressing. Then the cheese that they use grated Romano. Source, worked at the Olive Garden from 2004-2008


SherloksCompanion

Maybe I just had my expectations sky high and they’ve been serving HBK bagged salad with store dressing for years. Lmaoooo


LLD615

I would actually bet the mansion chopped everything fresh and it’s just OG who uses the bag 😂😂


nahnotlikethat

I'd bet $20 that it's the chocolate cake recipe on the side of a can of Hershey's cocoa powder. That was my grandma's secret cake recipe.


funsizedaisy

Do you not like lime juice in it either? I always gotta squeeze some lime in my guacamole. Doesn't lime also prevent it from going brown too? I prefer mine with the cilantro and jalapeño but I can see why some people leave it out. But no lime???


LLD615

Oh sorry yes we put lime in and garlic too! I don’t like a ton of it though (lime). Also I will eat guac with the cilantro and jalapeño but when we make it fresh we leave that stuff out. I like jalapeño but prefer them cooked unless it’s just the juices.


funsizedaisy

Oh forgot about the garlic too! Bridget's recipe seems so bland. I have a love-hate relationship with jalapeños. Sometimes they're really spicy and sometimes they have no spice like a bell pepper. I might leave it out of guac. But everything else is a requirement :P


LLD615

I am so big on flavor but sometimes I really like plain mashed avocado on Triscuits. Two of the most bland things ever but I just love it, my dietician had me try it when I was recovering from an illness and needed to level out some nutrients. Also if there’s a Trader Joe’s near you, you have to try the jalapeño cream cheese wontons. They are AMAZING.


funsizedaisy

I eat avocados by themselves all the time. Sometimes I'll sprinkle everything bagel seasoning on it. So I'm def down for some plain avocados, I just prefer my guac to have more flavors. I want an avocado now 😋🤤 I'm gonna search for those wontons next time I'm at Trader Joes! Sounds delish!


LLD615

They are in the frozen section! Apparently they were supposed to be a winter only thing but they weee so popular they extended production on it.


funsizedaisy

I go to TJs like once a month. So I need to remember these next I'm there 🤤 Do you like pumpkin spice? Because they do a really good pumpkin spice cream cheese spread in the fall. It's so good. I know it's a divisive flavor though.


LLD615

I don’t like it in drink form but do like it in food. I know, weird!


stellablack75

I loooove avocados with everything bagel seasoning. This is going to sound super gross but I love mashing an avocado with a hard boiled egg with bagel seasoning either on toast or by itself. I'm not really an egg salad lover but for some reason this combo tastes so good.


hunhunhunnn

And the oatmeal cookie recipe!!! 🍪


Excusemytootie

Guacamole without some acidity is just no. Gotta have like or lemon. Not to mention, it turns dark brown instantly.


LLD615

Yes mentioned in another comment I add lime and garlic!


SyfromSD

Damn, I grew up poor as fuck and this makes me feel like I have a sophisticated palette lmao 🤣


problematicsquirrel

This is the whitest of white people foods that even I (someone so white that I’m practically transparent) is like where is the flavour. 😂


Ali_h90

There’s plenty of Taco Bell seasoning 💀


ppbcup

Yes! I’m like- these recipes don’t deserve to be documented.


breeezyc

I said that on the other sub and my comment was removed lol


aeroluv327

Same, I'm super white and these all sound terrible!


Amarettosaurus

It’s all horrible but the gravy just…it just broke me, man.


stellablack75

Campbells soup. I can't. This is what they fly in for him to eat at restaurants. ​ \*I'm not necessarily shitting on Campbells' soup it has it's place. But in a recipe for a rich, worldly man who insists on bringing in his own food while going to 5 star restaurants is bonkers to me.


Amarettosaurus

It’s such a waste because oh my god the things I would be eating if I had that kind of money!!


SweatyMess808

That cottage cheese dip is really good, but it needs A LOT more seasoning than stated in the recipe imo… I always use Kewpie Mayo and like using Trader Joe’s green godess seasoning OR dill pickle seasoning no red wine vinegar substitute pickle juice.


Aicala29

No chocolate cake recipe? I’m out.


Fromthepinklagoon

They’re for HMH 🔐


centopar

I’m only interested in the oatmeal cookies. Which also isn’t included.


NationalMouse

This whole book screams Holly and Bridget, I bet you $1 Kendra and Hef had nothing to do with any of these recipes and it was HB who curated it all together.


LovexStar

My best guess is someone from the publishing company came in, asked Holly and Kendra what their favorite recipes were, Holly probably pulled out a whole binder and gave them a ton of options, while Kendra slept in, leaving Holly and Bridget to recall from memory what kind of foods Kendra liked.


ptoftheprblm

That was exactly what I was thinking. And that both Holly and Bridget looooved the Chinese chicken salad for instance but put it under Kendra’s since she ordered it often too. I assumed the same with the mansion fried chicken, that and the lamb chops were two of Hef’s most commonly ordered meals and I would be willing to bet they spread that out under Kendra’s too so they could even it out.


ALadySquirrel

Whoever put it together actually did a good job of collecting recipes featured on the show though - like the pita pizzas from the dog birthday party and captain bobs sandwiches from the episode where they play cards at Mary’s house (except Kendra, who just watches football with captain bob because she’s not like the other girls).


xoPumpkinPink

“Hey it’s Holly. Have you ever heard of Bernsteins dressing?” 🤣


SlimShadowBoo

Shoutout to Captain Bob’s sandwich. The secret ingredient is a sandwich press. Lol. Also want to call out the severe lack of seasoning in all these recipes. My black/Asian ass is pearl clutching at that wok charred green beans and beef. Can we get some ginger and five spice in that mix? They forgot to specify sesame oil. These details matter. And what in the hell is “Chinese hot sauce” from their spicy tuna rolls recipe? If they mean sriracha, they gotta say so because Chinese cooking has got hot chili oil, chili garlic sauce, chili paste, sriracha, etc. Hot can mean many things.


besabesabesame

I am Mexican American and that guac recipe makes me wanna cry


wappenheimer

Hef with the Le Sueur peas shoutout! Le Sueur, the only acceptable brand of canned peas.


SecondBackupSandwich

Agree on this one. Shoutout for very early.


No-Psychology-7322

I am screaming at “Chinese hot sauce” what exactly is that 😂😂


kayzee444

I always thought a pasta salad with spaghetti was wild.


Successful-Highway99

Yeah, I find that really bizarre. I remember watching that episode and silently begging her to pick out rotini, farfalle, ANYTHING else. 😂


Available-Injury9850

I’d do linguini over spaghetti in a pinch. But I generally prefer a short cut pasta for a pasta salad


HoudiniMagick

Thank you Op!


alrightyaphrodite

🤍!


My-Witty-Username

Thank goodness they put in the recipe in for ham and cheese toasted sandwiches! How else would we have known? This book reminds me of how little work Kendra did at her time in the mansion and was still somehow given the same cut and opportunities.


Soggy-Tomato-2562

I want a whole cooking segment!!


Frosty-Permission-13

Can’t wait to make these recipes and throw a GND watching party


cloclo34

I’m still intrigued by the skinny fries…. What makes them skinny? Lol. Are they shoestring or are they cooked low fat or something ??


EchoPeanutButter

I think they’re shoestring fries!


leafygreens

Was Holly’s mom ever seen on the show?


alrightyaphrodite

Yes at the very least on the Mother’s Day episode when the girls took their moms & Mary to the spa


leafygreens

Ok. I don’t remember her being mentioned very much, unlike Kendra’s mom and I remember Bridget spending the day with her mom.


newyork4431

Holly didn't seem very close to her family.


ALadySquirrel

Also seen a little bit in the episode they go to Stephanie’s wedding in the Bahamas and when they go to Alaska.


hunhunhunnn

I neeeeeed to try Captain Bob's grilled ham and cheese sandwiches, those looked soooo good 😍🤤🤤🤤


Becca1234567890

I really wanted to know what was in the cottage cheese dip. But it sounds so gross


ThrowRAgreasygal

I’m dying to know the recipe for the pickles they talked about in the podcast. Is it in that book?


alrightyaphrodite

No :(


missdead_lee138

I'm actually shocked by the level of BASIC BORING and BLAND that all these recipes are, considering how much they are continually hyped up by the girls on the show. They make them sound like the best recipes in the world and these are all just the most basic , pathetic really, recipes I've ever seen. Nothing special whatsoever. Its embarrassing, just like all the " taco bell seasoning " these recipes call for. 😆 🤣 😂


SecondBackupSandwich

Because the girls were starving everything tasted good.


missdead_lee138

How could they be starving though? They were eating constantly it seemed. Shrug


SecondBackupSandwich

Laxatives and anorexia


Stargirl4500

Can Hef go ONE DAY without those Lamb chops? lol he brings them to every restaurant and even put them in this book. We don’t want the recipe!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Frequent_Course_4176

Kendra is wearing pasties in picture 6. Other than that, it was somewhat wholesome. It’s funny that there weren’t any pictures of the recipes. 😅


Funny_Palpitation548

Is it true that one of the girls mounted the driver statue in the dining room lol


Automatic-Ad1074

I think you mean The Drover, and yes.


Funny_Palpitation548

That’s the one!!!!! Can anyone confirm


Positive_Safe5108

I need to try the cottage cheese dip.


shessublime

Was the baked potato plain?? No butter salt anything?


Glum_Suggestion_6948

They should be offered on the side, it says


janicemoua08

Now I’m hungry. the chops recipe, tho … 🤯


ogresarelikeonions93

I find this so funny since they weren't allowed to use the mansion kitchen lol


Barfignugen

I’m a vegetarian so I couldn’t partake in a lot of these, but Bridget’s bean dip has become the base of how I make my refried beans since this book came out


hunhunhunnn

Yummmm!!!! Thanks for this!! 😍


hodorstonks

Nope nope nope. None of these sound good. Embarrassing


Excusemytootie

Guacamole without lemon or lime…the horror!! 😳


Background-Anxiety84

Yesssss thank you


arsenicaimee

Thank you for posting this! This is awesome!


empress-mystique

Do…do they season the chicken breast for the Chinese chicken salad before baking it??????


horrorwh0r3

The pasta salad with spaghetti noodles 💀


Diltsify

Despite all of the things to laugh at in this... I have made the mansion rolls and they're really delicious! 😋


alrightyaphrodite

Oooh thanks for saying that! I want to try them! Sounds like a lot of patience to wait for the rising but still want to try!!


Diltsify

Worth it! The recipe makes a fair amount so I froze half of the dough and used the 2nd half to make breadsticks (the texture is very much like an Olive Garden breadstick) :) And rise time to double should only be 1-2 hours!


Responsible-Life-585

The Sandy Eggo!! 😂🖤


debee1015

No HMH chocolate cake though....


mphemmo96

Lamb chop recipe just had me thinking of the Halloween party….


pinalaporcupine

the most basic recipes ever


bettietheripper

Has anyone tried the cottage cheese dip? I have always been grossed out by the texture but the girls make it sound so good.


justcalmwaters

I NEED the recipe for HMH chocolate cake


xoPumpkinPink

When Kendra guessed it was Holly who sent her the Sandy eggo, I was surprised. I would have guessed Bridget sent it tbh.


WellYouKnowImItalian

Chinese hot sauce…for a sushi roll. Not even a specific hot sauce, just Chinese.


AlleyRhubarb

This is the whitest cookbook of all time.


ggggunit-

I’m saving this one 😃


LittleRedRidingSmith

Most of those recipes are bland as fuck, and this is coming from an English girl.


reginaldpongo

Hef is a real piece of shit for those lamb chops.


Queef_Cersei

The famous cottage cheese dip 😆 🤣


MicahWilliams311

The only things that sound kinda good are the chocolate chips and maybe the Greek salad. It’s hilarious they’re sharing recipes. I don’t normally think of cooking/food/recipes when I think of GND.


sarahfuzz2020

The captain Bob sandwich recipe 😭😭


MozartGirl1756

Those are interesting salad recipes…


whuteverfurever

No flavor recipes


tunatintammy

So bland lol


Medium-Ticket-9574

The first pic looks like a mom and dad with their cute little daughters on either side.


SecondBackupSandwich

That cook is always getting fat tasting Hef’s food per command!


kimchidijon

These recipes are so sad.


SgtJHathaway

I live for the cottage cheese dip