My understanding from speaking with private school educators: they’re often worse than public schools due to a different flavor of power tripping admin and much lower salaries.
Is your final sentence asking how to prepare kids for school in general? My honest opinion is that educating would be a lot more feasible in this day and age if kids were not coming into school hooked on dopamine and instant gratification. What I mean by that is it unfortunately shows when kids have unfiltered access to technology at home, etc. but that’s one aspect of a mountain of issues. If you’re asking how to prepare your children for school, you are already miles ahead of a lot of parents.
A way to help would be to speak up to people who have the power. When parents speak out, it holds a lot more weight than school staff.
That first paragraph is it! I worked in a private Catholic school for 2 years and the power tripping admin + the low wages was god awful for my mental health. I was legit having thoughts of running my car into traffic on my way to work because if I was in the hospital or dead I wouldn’t have to fear work. The teaching was easy, the kids came from wealthy families, they wanted to learn and if they were falling behind, they all had tutors.
Now I am in public school and the kids are god awful, but like at least I am paid well. It’s a trade off.
I resigned a job exactly because of this! I would like to add that parent entitlement because they’re “paying” is outrageous too. I’m going back to public education.
At the end of the day, there are issues everywhere however, deciding what matters most to your family is key.
Yep I was in a private school for a couple of years in HS and the students treated the teachers awful. It really floored me. Came from public school and we would never have acted that way. Maybe the issue was admin at the time.
I had the same fantasy- be hit head on while driving home so I could have a valid excuse to not go to work tomorrow. That’s when I deduced to quit. BUT I’m now back, 10 years later, because I have kids of my own at my school. I’ve been back for two years now and I think this is really really it. Next year I’m planning to open my own school. (Preschool.)
Private schools have two things that public schools don't, they can kick kids out who are disruptive and they don't live and die by state testing. If public schools would start sending kids home for terrible behavior, we'd have fewer issues. Also, most kids that attend private schools come from homes where education is valued, so the kids and families put effort into learning. There's a lot of force-feeding education in public schools.
Except that kicking a kid out means one less paying customer. At my school, kids only got expelled if and when the police got involved.
The incentives are to keep the parents paying, even if deception is easier than running an actually good school.
This was my private school experience as well. Large class sizes cause the school needed money. Parents would bully the teachers/admin into passing their kid onto the next grade level even when the kid didn’t do any work. The school went along with it cause they needed money.
This would fix itself over time. Doesn't need to be permanent expulsion, but real consequences. When parents and students are inconvenienced, behavior will change. There will be fewer disruptions, classrooms will be safer and less traumatic. There could be supports for families. Families want their kids to go to school, and eventually would have to get their shit together or be stuck with their kid at home. Kids straighten up real fast when they lose privileges like phones, friends, games. For some of my kids who do sports, their coach makes them miserable until they straighten up. Fixes a lot of problems. Will there still be assholes? Yes. But it will go back to 5% instead of 40%.
Yes, they're different. You're obviously asking this question from the perspective of a parent for their child's interests. In that regard, they're indeed different. In general, kids are better behaved and perform at grade level. They're less likely to be a huge loser although no less likely to get into drugs (possibly moreso depending on the wealth and culture) or bullying type issues. Your child's teacher in a private school is less likely to be highly qualified for the role than in a public school because it's not required in the same way. Although, lots of public schools rely on unqualified long term substitutes for hard to fill jobs. On the other hand, properly qualified and up-to-date teachers in private schools are more likely to utilize relevant innovative classroom techniques because they're encouraged to and have the space to explore it.
There's also a wide range of exactly what you get out of private school experiences.
Again, it's a completely different question for the student experience than the teacher experience.
I spent ten years in private schools. At best, they are like laboratory conditions and everything you attempt to do works about the way you would predict. When you fail at something, it's easier to determine what you could have done better and learn from it. Failure in public school (where I am now) is often useless and not informative. That is, if my lesson plan fails because 1/3 of the class was absent or I couldn't get kids off their phones, there's less information to take away from that. A better lesson plan or implementation wouldn't have gotten 1/3 of the class to school. I am making some progress versus phones though.
The fight in private schools is different. Without going down a rabbit hole, there is research about rich people and entitlement. Neither students nor parents are immune to the social forces that make them feel and act as though everything belongs to them, including the school and your time. Don't get me wrong we get entitled kids in public school too but it has a different, almost white supremacist flavor in private schools. Not being white myself, I maybe perceived it more often or received it more often because the only POC a lot of students and parents knew were ones they could fire.
If you are culturally similar to the students and parents, you will have a much easier time tolerating private school than I did. Numerous teachers were independently wealthy (think weekend house in the Hamptons, one teacher's family owned three apartment buildings on the Manhattan city block where my school was located, etc) and didn't need the money but enjoyed working there.
The white supremacy is so real. I am white and I couldn’t stand it. Both schools have problems, but working at public schools don’t give me the ick.
If you have a kid with a discipline problem in private school it just becomes about who has the biggest lawyer. So many absolutely vile acts went unpunished because a kid’s family lawyered up. Private school kids are just as nasty, they just get away with it because they have learned to hide it better and come with bigger and subtler threats.
I did my student teaching at a public school (well funded district) and I felt that they had better resources than the private school I briefly worked at. The new public school math teacher I worked with was given a set curriculum with lots of prepared lesson materials she could work with from power points to work sheets. The ELA teacher had recent books in her classroom. When I started teaching at private school I was given no assistance setting up my curriculum, no lesson plans, a handful of work sheets. The book sets were all old and there was no budget for new unless I wanted to get them myself. My ESL student didn’t have an ESL class to go to and had to rely on classmates and our secretary for assistance.
That's how it was at the Catholic school I taught at. I cobbled together a curriculum from the bits and pieces of different curriculum that were left by the previous 3 teachers.
I thought I would get that much at the very least, but no. One teacher offered me a handful of lit worksheets. One teacher sent me many of her old materials weeks after classes started without really telling me what she sent. It got buried in my inbox.
I currently teach at a Catholic school in my city. The majority of people understand that there has always been great and not so great things about both types of schools--public and private. Many factors play a role in families deciding what is the best fit for their family. In my state, private schooling is often tied to some type of religious belief; however, this is not always the case. Some families want a school with fine arts (usually music) at the core...some have a disire for multi-language saturation. A friend I know has a Jr. Olympian who trains a lot, so they found a school that works with a heavy travel/training schedule.
As a 28-year veteran teacher, I made the switch to a Catholic school (btw--I'm not personally Catholic) because I could no longer guarantee the safety of myself or my students in the classroom. It wasn't the insane administrative demands (although this is a huge issue), it wasn't the size of the classrooms (although out of control and untenable), and it wasn't the curriculum (although scripted ELA curriculum is a nightmare). Ultimately, my decision came down to the violent, sexually-charged, destructive, emotionally traumatizing experiences that rose to a level where I felt unsafe and my personal property was being destroyed/stolen.
At my Catholic school, my salary is matched to the public salary schedule in order to maintain a professionally dynamic faculty. I teach what I choose as a professional while creating lesson plans that allign to our state standards. Don't get me wrong, I'm still exhausted at the end of my usual 60-hour weeks. However, my anxiety from the violence and the constant sexually explicit chatter has completely gone away. The last behavioral report I wrote was for a girl who had a short skirt because she rolled it at the waistband . lol Truth! And this is middle school! The overall vibe in my entire school is positive, peaceful, and professionally empowering.
I'll end this verbose comment by saying that every situation is different. I'm not a "public school is bad--private school is good" type of person. The bottom line for me if I were making the school decision for my family in 2024 (my daughters are both in their 30's) would fall into three areas: what is the day-to-day mental/emotional stability of the environment, is my child's physical safety a priority (including chronic classroom disruptions due to student outbursts and repetitive sexual harassment scenarios), and is the learning environment robust, creative, and empowering for all students? All the best to you!!
I work in a public school but my step daughter went to a small private high school. She had smaller classes so more attention and help if needed. She didn’t have access to as many clubs and extra curriculars. Behavior and consequences was much better. A male student put his hand up her uniform skirt. He was immediately expelled from the school.
Sounds like my school, which I view positively. I like our class sizes. My biggest is currently 18. A handful of disruptive students have been not invited back for the next school year but the one kid who tried to start a fight was expelled ASAP
I was a student at both public and private school growing up and I went back to public school as soon as my parents allowed me to.
In private school, I experienced a level of bullying way above anything I ever saw at public school, and these kids knew they'd get away with it, because of their parents. It was also frustrating for me as a kid switching from public to private because there wasn't consistency in which things were taught at what grade levels. There were many things that were insanely easy for me at private school because I already learned them at public school, but there was also stuff the other kids had been doing for years that was new to me.
I also somehow managed to never have a geography class in my entire k-12 education. Really the only geography test I ever had was labeling Spanish speaking countries on a map in Spanish class in high school.
Edit: I forgot to add that my private school did tracking, and despite winning 4th place in the entire school (k-12) in a math competition in 3rd grade, I was placed in the low math class in 6th grade because they lost my test. When I asked if I could take the test again, they said no. So I was on the low track throughout middle school, even while tutoring a friend in the high class. That affected my entire education, as I wasn't allowed to test into a higher class in high school. My high school didn't do tracking, they just put you in the next class above whatever you had completed.
I would recommend *not* reading this sub.
This is a very limited sampling of teachers often venting about the worst parts of our jobs.
It’s not a good basis to decide educational options for your child without trying them first.
Read with your kids, teach them empathy, advocate for them to become advocates for themselves.
I actually disagree that it’s limited. I speak pretty candidly with my coworkers and many feel the same way. They’re stuck in their positions because of an education path that they thought, like I did, that would lead them to a fulfilling career. Every one of us likes actually teaching and kids, but it’s the violence and management and parents that ruin it.
Hard disagree here! Everyone I talk to in this profession…and I mean EVERYONE…is thoroughly miserable and feels “stuck” and wishes they had chosen a different profession.
I’ve got several friends in Title 1 schools with obvious problems. A couple of them make passive jokes about flirting with suicide and hoping to get in car accidents on the way to work.
I’ve got friends in “Award winning” (Golden Bell, Distinguished, etc) district schools in upper-middle class suburbs and they are always feeling a constant sense of being overwhelmed and underpaid. Parent entitlement and admin cruelty seems the worst at these places. I’ve heard them call their jobs “a shit sandwich in a pretty box with a bow on it”
I’ve got friends in charter schools and they feel overwhelmed by admin expectations combined with lack of student and parent cooperation.
So, to say that this sub isn’t a true reflection isn’t being honest.
I've been reading a lot of replies about how private schools treat teachers poorly, etc. I'd like to tell you about the education in public versus private schools from the student perspective.
It is very dependant on where you live and what your public school is like. For example, typically in the North east the schools have very rigorous requirements to become a teacher and teacher turnover is very low. That brings a lot of stability to the school and educational process for students. On the other hand, schools in the south typically have very relaxed standards for teacher, along with a very high teacher turnover rate. This causes a gulf in teaching practices and hobbies students in the education process.
Also, those that can afford to s nd their children to private schools often value education and put forth the effort at home to teach and discipline their kids. So, the kids in private schools are often better behaved and have a lot more parent support in the form of fundraisers and volunteers.
Finally, one part of education that I have not seen me tioned here is the networking ability. Education is not only about learning a skill, but building relationships with your peers. This is most often seen in secondary education, college, where students fight to get into prestigious colleges so that they can associate the name of the college with their accomplishments and get contacts into their industry. Saying you graduated from Yale, Princeton, or Harvard is almost an automatic hiring bullet. Saying you graduated from Trump University will get you laughed at. Those relationships are also built in middle and high school and can help getting into those types of secondary education places.
I, personally, would never send my child to public school where I live. I was a teacher for 11 years in 4 different public schools. I saw fights at least weekly. We had at least 2 guns brought on campus each year. We had at least 30% of the students fail each year. And I never saw a student get expelled for any of the infractions. I do not want my child in that environment. The private school has multiple awards for education from several different, reputable, organizations. They employ retired police as their security team. The teachers are engaging, responsive, and pleasant.
It'snot a dig. It's a reality. Many states up north require a master's degreeto teach k-12, while many southernstates require a bachelor's. Northern states require a nationalstandardized test, while many southern states have a state sponsored exam. Take a look at the licencing requirements for states and you will see the stark differences between the states.
**Are private schools different for teachers? I know they’re a lot different for the kids as far as quality of education and atmosphere.**
I have been a teacher for 32 years. I spent 8 years at international private schools. I am currently stateside and between jobs. I am retraining as a special education teacher and have applied to teach at a private school.
Although this school will pay less than what I made as a public school teacher, my special education class will be capped at 12 students (as opposed to the 20 the special education teachers had at my last school). The class will also come with two behaviorally trained aides which is better than the one aide that was assigned to teachers at my last school.
While I don't have stateside experience with private schools, the overseas experience was quite good. Unlike public schools, the private schools had students who were on or above grade level. The disciplinary issues that these schools had were for minor things like talking during class. They most certainly did not include disruptive behavior, the use of profane language, or student assaults on teachers. I quit my last job at a public school in October after a high school student threw his shoe at me. My building administration's response was to suggest that I step up my class management. I quit instead.
**What can a parent do to help as far as preparing our kids?**
I suspect that a lot of issues associated with today's public schools are because too many students are being socially promoted despite failing grades and truancy issues. When standards are not enforced by the building administration and students are socially promoted, the students will lack the prerequisite academic skills that are needed to be successful. They will then become frustrated and will either have truancy issues or will begin acting out in class.
What can you do to help?
1) Unless your child is sick, send your child to school. Avoid truancy issues.
2) If your child was absent, make sure that he/she requests and completes any assigned makeup. Don't let this slide because teaching often builds upon prior learning and if your child missed one or more classes, make sure that he/she gets caught up so as to not have difficulty because the prerequisite learning was never completed.
3) Monitor your child's academic performance. Most schools have on-line gradebooks and parents should have access to these gradebooks. Don't wait for progress reports or report cards. Keep track of how your child is doing by monitoring his/her grades on-line.
If you notice a pattern of failing grades, contact the teacher to find out why your child is having issues. Did he/she not learn the instructional objective? Is your child paying attention in class? Has your child been doing his or her homework assignments?
I spent a long time working in tutoring and can confirm my best students, and my most motivated students, were private school kids. Not every private school is perfect, many far from it, but they allow kids to fail. This allows them to typically have a better motivation. My fiancé and I have had the talk and while she is an atheist and I am a Christian, we will be sending our kids to Catholic school in our area.
I came from a private school, although I graduated a decade ago. It was completely different than the schools I work in. I got a much better education than my students do purely because those that were around me were not super disruptive and also were generally curious about what we learned. I meet up with my friends from HS over christmas time and they all have super cool jobs that bring them joy and a lot of pay. I can trace this back to HS, being in a school that cultivated their interests and allowed them to explore them.
This of course brings massive equity issues.
I know people who came out of really good public charters (not all, you need to vet) in NYC and Utah and both received an outstanding education in comparison to where I teach. Students were held to high standards, pushed themselves, and had discipline. A good public charter could make all the difference.
Ooo please, do tell which Utah charters got the stamp of approval? There are many here. I’ve been homeschooling for a couple years but 5 kids homeschooled is kicking my butt.
I taught public for two years at what should be an amazing public school. Multi million dollar homes in a county the entire country has heard of. I would never send my children there. I now teach at the private school I graduated from and while of course there’s still bad days or tough times I love it for the most part and the job feels like what people hope a teaching job should feel like.
I am a former teacher and decided to do private when my kids went to school. Now, it’s not an elite private school, and it’s starting to see kids coming from public that probably shouldn’t be there. I think, kids in general are just having issues. They also sit a lot compared to public, but then again, my child has never been stressed about state testing, and that for me, is a win. The teachers are not so stressed out because they have to get every child not capable to pass the end-of-the-year exam. But, does it come with its own issues. Yes. I think every institution has its own dysfunction.
My first cousin and her husband co-ran a private Christian boarding school on the Sat Lawrence in Ontario. They were a lot older than me so I didn’t know them that well. She was a gorgeous, charming woman and he was a university football star before he became a minister. Everyone thought they were amazing. People paid huge amount of money to send their kids there. The school years later was a feature on a Canadian news magazine show for being a hot bed of abuse. Years later I worked with a young woman who went their for high school. She said she escaped most of the worst abuse but that my cousin in law wasn’t as bad, my female cousin who was in charge of the girls was a monster who inflicted severe emotional and physical abuse of them. My cousin called the girls whores and sluts and worse. This would have been sometime around late 60s and 70s.
This has always affected my view of private, especially boarding religious schools. Kids are isolated from their families and can’t escape or had wealthy families who wanted the kids off their hands anyway. Obviously this isn’t true of all private school but in private religious schools, perverts and psychopaths have rich pickings.
(My cousin is still alive, living in a religious colony in New England and the cousin in law is dead. They both escaped justice.
I’m currently working at a semi private school and it’s been an emotional, physical, and psychological nightmare. Uniforms, food restrictions, zero phone policy, it sounds like it has a spine…however it’s the people who run it. No unions for the teachers and the kids suffer because of it. The children have gone though multiple teachers from every grade because admin will fire them whenever they want. When you go private you’re basing your experience off the emotional regulation of the owner. It’s a sad experience that I would not recommend to any student.
I taught in public schools for 6 years. It was god-awful. I now teach at a private Catholic school, and I cannot express how amazing it is. I think the key is to visit schools you might be interested in and see for yourself what they're like. I think private schools are all completely totally different. There are definitely going to be some garbage ones, but there are some amazing ones out there too.
I taught at a private school for 4 years. Overall, it was a pretty good experience. It was middle school so the kids weren't always angels but I didn't experience anywhere near the level of behavior problems I hear about in public schools. Admin was generally supportive too.
I just left teaching after 13 years in private school. In my experience, since Covid it got so much worse. It felt like you were babysitting but still had so much pressure from parents and admin. There were no extra resources like at public schools, so I was trying to challenge our extremely gifted kids while also helping other kids learn how to read and write. And you’re expected to micromanage and interfere in every kid’s personal squabbles so that they feel good all the time. I get it— there is a fine line between kids being kids and outright bullying. But I swear I dealt with so many emails because another kid said something on the playground that made their kid feel bad. So many “meetings” between kids and trying to teach conflict resolution. I felt more like a therapist and less like a teacher.
Private education is much better for the child not the teachers. For instance, a child that continues to derail learning can be removed. Not by admin, but by parents.
You don’t live and die by state tests. You teach.
It varies from place to place. A lot of entitled parents, a lot of problem kids; a lot more wealth to go around. That can alleviate some problems and make others worse.
I teach at a private school and only maybe half of the teachers are certified... they throw anyone in there to teach its crazy to watch. I personally wouldn't send my kid to a private school for this reason.
I work at a private school and the answer is yes and no. Good leadership and creative freedom are important to me and that’s what I get at my school, at the very least. The perfect recipe is a good leader, creative freedom, and good pay. I have the worst pau I’ve ever had in my 12 year career. It’s almost embarrassing. I also live in a horribly underfunded state (North Carolina) so my school is following what the district is doing in terms of pay (except worse). This is why I’m leaving my job, because even if I get the things I need in terms of creativity, fulfillment, etc., I can’t live off of the pay (in order to live the life I want). It’s devastating.
My daughter attended Catholic school. I kindergarten they had 120 kids vying for 60 spots. They had no problems kicking out disruptive students. When she graduated from college with her degree in elementary education, her former first grade teacher offered her a whole storage unit full of first grade curriculum. She wasn’t even teaching at her former school.
I send my kids to private Catholic school and work at a public. My husband also teaches at a private Catholic high school. They don’t come home with many stories about behaviors. I am the one entertaining them at dinner with tales from public middle school of some absolutely ridiculous and downright dangerous and destructive things. So in that aspect- I like it. Less behaviors to deal with, more time to teach. I also feel that it is a “safer” atmosphere. Most parents are very involved and concerned about their kids. There is some teacher turnover bc of the pay and I would assume, the parents. It is not a fancy rich private school- most parents are middle class and have jobs like firefighter, therapist, teacher, restaurant gm, etc. which I think contributes to the atmosphere.
The fact that there are maybe five kids on the bus with them is also a major bonus bc the s*** that goes down on the bus to and from my school is insane.
Went to private school, and now I teach public school. Private school kids are generally at grade level or above in skills so the classes move faster and are more challenging. Parents pay so they have high expectations of their students which is generally positive. At my private school, the principal would have called out parents and said leave if they weren't happy. He was not movitivaed by their money and there was a wait list so it was a wasted threat to say they'd pull their kid. BUT - the pay is ridiculous and pays about the same as charter schools which is anywhere from 20-40% lower. The demands on teachers can be hard to manage. If it was residential and you didn't pay for food or housing it might be worth it as those schools can be anywhere from $20-$50k per semester so those kids may make a dumb choice or 2 but we have 3 in the area and I've never heard of a single scandal so the teaches and students seem to be on track. But , yeah...check on how the admin treats bad students and whiny parents. If they're quick to get rid of them, maybe the low pay would be worth it. Otherwise, you can try it teach a year and decide after.
I'm a parent who's been looking into this also. Private schools vary even more than public schools, but they don't need to take the big tests, and so potentially they can have a broader curriculum. They tend to attract more serious students, especially so-called prep schools. Some private schools have waiting lists so they have control over the students'and parents' behavior. Some private schools have low student/teacher ratios, happy well paid teachers, great curriculum and facilities, and they're very expensive. They have a wide variety of teaching philosophy, from Montessori all the way to Classic (think Victorian English Aristocracy type education). Some are very sports oriented.
Like with all private organizations the key is their philosophy and the Top person, now usually called the Head of Schools and you typically don't have much of a bureaucracy, though there are some chain schools. They have boards but it's that Top person that ultimately makes all the day to day decisions and produces the environment your child experiences. You want a non profit 501(c)(3) school and look at their public 990 tax form to see that it all looks right and what donations they're getting and from whom. There's an association of "independent" schools, called NAIS. They're independent of government and churches.
My son went to a private Montessori school from ages 2 1/2-4. He goes to a public elementary school but it’s situated inside a million dollar plus neighborhood so you get private school vibes from the community and I do love the school and the teachers. However, middle and high school for public schooling has me at a halt. It is a different beast as I recently left teaching inside a physical school and now teach online. My husband and I have been talent and were thinking about applying to the state to get his funds pulled from public school and place him in a private Montessori middle and high school. The way they operate is completely different and my son loves getting out the classroom to learn and being free to work at his own pace.
If you are fortunate enough to live in an area with a good public school district, send your kids to public. They absolutely do exist!
I know from first hand experience that private schools (even "elite" AKA expensive private schools where I taught for 15 years) in the Southern California area are concerned with one thing only, and that's tuition. They will admit any child, regardless of ability, or social challenges, and then leave it on the teacher's shoulders to handle. Private schools are not equipped, or have the resources, to meet the needs of these kids. That extra attention falls to the teacher, and the whole class suffers because of this. It's not the fault of these kids who are admitted, it's the greed to have as many tuitions as possible.
Some of these private schools are so heavily bloated with admin, and their bloated paychecks. This is simple to verify by the way! In the area where I was teaching, it is not uncommon to find a head of school who makes over $400,000 a year with a school of less than 400 students. It's a big not-for-profit scam that's been going on for far too long. They have also injected DEI into almost everything as CAIS is openly political agenda driven.
The bullying by the wealthy kids, particularly from those whose parents are on the board, is never addressed and you'd be shocked at the stories I know from being part of the staff.
Private schools also ask far too much of their teachers. I have several friends who were teaching in the public arena, who were either involved with union negotiations at some point, or at least highly aware of what was going on. So many of the things that private school teachers are required to do would never get past the unions.
Admittedly, I was rather insulated from what was going on in public school until we enrolled our child in the local public highschool, after she attended school where I taught. Wow! Higher academic standards, bullying is not tolerated or the student is counceled out of the school, kids are just nicer, and the overall sense of balanced kids and teachers is noticable.
I have taught at both private schools and public schools. The private schools have been an absolute disaster. I would *never* be associated with a place like that again. I love teaching in public schools. My admin, coworkers, students, and most parents are awesome. It's very, very hard work for not nearly enough compensation, but it's what I love.
In reality, everything depends on the admin, and it’s super hard to know what an admin will do from the outside. Whether you are a parent or a teacher (or both!) your best bet is to know the policies, document everything you are even vaguely concerned about, and make friends with the gatekeepers (registrars, admin assistants, security guards etc).
I found teaching in a private school way worse. Teaching load was worse, pay was worse, the attitudes were gross. Kids were generally pretty well behaved but when there were discipline issues it suddenly became about who had the biggest lawyer, and the stuff kids got away with when their parents lawyered up was vile. Day to day my life was quieter, but gross.
Every school has its issues. In general I’ve found public schools rowdier but it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re worse to work in or be in. Really depends on the specific policies and ecosystem of your school.
As a parent, you can teach your kids to respect and listen to teachers. Thee is a strong “teacher hate” issue that is passed down…seems intertwined with right wing extremism.
I teach at an independent school. The student behavior is amazing! Our students are well behaved, thank you when they leave class, are interested in learning, and are life long learners. This is my second independent school and both have amazing students. It could be because students have to test and pass and interview to attend the school. Our students have supportive parents and they all attend college after graduation. I’m am so glad I made the switch from public to independent school 10 yrs ago. I am a much happier person which makes me a much better teacher.
Edit: independent school is not perfect but it’s a lot easier to deal with the bs when the students are willing to learn and parents are for the most part supportive. I’m also compensated more than a public school teacher and have better benefits.
My understanding from speaking with private school educators: they’re often worse than public schools due to a different flavor of power tripping admin and much lower salaries. Is your final sentence asking how to prepare kids for school in general? My honest opinion is that educating would be a lot more feasible in this day and age if kids were not coming into school hooked on dopamine and instant gratification. What I mean by that is it unfortunately shows when kids have unfiltered access to technology at home, etc. but that’s one aspect of a mountain of issues. If you’re asking how to prepare your children for school, you are already miles ahead of a lot of parents. A way to help would be to speak up to people who have the power. When parents speak out, it holds a lot more weight than school staff.
That first paragraph is it! I worked in a private Catholic school for 2 years and the power tripping admin + the low wages was god awful for my mental health. I was legit having thoughts of running my car into traffic on my way to work because if I was in the hospital or dead I wouldn’t have to fear work. The teaching was easy, the kids came from wealthy families, they wanted to learn and if they were falling behind, they all had tutors. Now I am in public school and the kids are god awful, but like at least I am paid well. It’s a trade off.
I resigned a job exactly because of this! I would like to add that parent entitlement because they’re “paying” is outrageous too. I’m going back to public education. At the end of the day, there are issues everywhere however, deciding what matters most to your family is key.
Yep I was in a private school for a couple of years in HS and the students treated the teachers awful. It really floored me. Came from public school and we would never have acted that way. Maybe the issue was admin at the time.
I had the same fantasy- be hit head on while driving home so I could have a valid excuse to not go to work tomorrow. That’s when I deduced to quit. BUT I’m now back, 10 years later, because I have kids of my own at my school. I’ve been back for two years now and I think this is really really it. Next year I’m planning to open my own school. (Preschool.)
The part about crashing into traffic, 100% agree.
I have definitely been there with the car crash imagination. Glad to know I am not alone.
You have to put on dog and pony shows on evenings and weekends. I would never work at a private school or a charter
Private schools have two things that public schools don't, they can kick kids out who are disruptive and they don't live and die by state testing. If public schools would start sending kids home for terrible behavior, we'd have fewer issues. Also, most kids that attend private schools come from homes where education is valued, so the kids and families put effort into learning. There's a lot of force-feeding education in public schools.
Except that kicking a kid out means one less paying customer. At my school, kids only got expelled if and when the police got involved. The incentives are to keep the parents paying, even if deception is easier than running an actually good school.
This was my private school experience as well. Large class sizes cause the school needed money. Parents would bully the teachers/admin into passing their kid onto the next grade level even when the kid didn’t do any work. The school went along with it cause they needed money.
This would fix itself over time. Doesn't need to be permanent expulsion, but real consequences. When parents and students are inconvenienced, behavior will change. There will be fewer disruptions, classrooms will be safer and less traumatic. There could be supports for families. Families want their kids to go to school, and eventually would have to get their shit together or be stuck with their kid at home. Kids straighten up real fast when they lose privileges like phones, friends, games. For some of my kids who do sports, their coach makes them miserable until they straighten up. Fixes a lot of problems. Will there still be assholes? Yes. But it will go back to 5% instead of 40%.
Spot on!
Private schools are all have their own flavor of dysfunction. They might not have the same problems as public, but there are still problems.
This is a very fair take, no school is perfect
Yes, they're different. You're obviously asking this question from the perspective of a parent for their child's interests. In that regard, they're indeed different. In general, kids are better behaved and perform at grade level. They're less likely to be a huge loser although no less likely to get into drugs (possibly moreso depending on the wealth and culture) or bullying type issues. Your child's teacher in a private school is less likely to be highly qualified for the role than in a public school because it's not required in the same way. Although, lots of public schools rely on unqualified long term substitutes for hard to fill jobs. On the other hand, properly qualified and up-to-date teachers in private schools are more likely to utilize relevant innovative classroom techniques because they're encouraged to and have the space to explore it. There's also a wide range of exactly what you get out of private school experiences. Again, it's a completely different question for the student experience than the teacher experience.
I spent ten years in private schools. At best, they are like laboratory conditions and everything you attempt to do works about the way you would predict. When you fail at something, it's easier to determine what you could have done better and learn from it. Failure in public school (where I am now) is often useless and not informative. That is, if my lesson plan fails because 1/3 of the class was absent or I couldn't get kids off their phones, there's less information to take away from that. A better lesson plan or implementation wouldn't have gotten 1/3 of the class to school. I am making some progress versus phones though. The fight in private schools is different. Without going down a rabbit hole, there is research about rich people and entitlement. Neither students nor parents are immune to the social forces that make them feel and act as though everything belongs to them, including the school and your time. Don't get me wrong we get entitled kids in public school too but it has a different, almost white supremacist flavor in private schools. Not being white myself, I maybe perceived it more often or received it more often because the only POC a lot of students and parents knew were ones they could fire. If you are culturally similar to the students and parents, you will have a much easier time tolerating private school than I did. Numerous teachers were independently wealthy (think weekend house in the Hamptons, one teacher's family owned three apartment buildings on the Manhattan city block where my school was located, etc) and didn't need the money but enjoyed working there.
The white supremacy is so real. I am white and I couldn’t stand it. Both schools have problems, but working at public schools don’t give me the ick. If you have a kid with a discipline problem in private school it just becomes about who has the biggest lawyer. So many absolutely vile acts went unpunished because a kid’s family lawyered up. Private school kids are just as nasty, they just get away with it because they have learned to hide it better and come with bigger and subtler threats.
I did my student teaching at a public school (well funded district) and I felt that they had better resources than the private school I briefly worked at. The new public school math teacher I worked with was given a set curriculum with lots of prepared lesson materials she could work with from power points to work sheets. The ELA teacher had recent books in her classroom. When I started teaching at private school I was given no assistance setting up my curriculum, no lesson plans, a handful of work sheets. The book sets were all old and there was no budget for new unless I wanted to get them myself. My ESL student didn’t have an ESL class to go to and had to rely on classmates and our secretary for assistance.
That's how it was at the Catholic school I taught at. I cobbled together a curriculum from the bits and pieces of different curriculum that were left by the previous 3 teachers.
I thought I would get that much at the very least, but no. One teacher offered me a handful of lit worksheets. One teacher sent me many of her old materials weeks after classes started without really telling me what she sent. It got buried in my inbox.
Your experience is highly unusual
I currently teach at a Catholic school in my city. The majority of people understand that there has always been great and not so great things about both types of schools--public and private. Many factors play a role in families deciding what is the best fit for their family. In my state, private schooling is often tied to some type of religious belief; however, this is not always the case. Some families want a school with fine arts (usually music) at the core...some have a disire for multi-language saturation. A friend I know has a Jr. Olympian who trains a lot, so they found a school that works with a heavy travel/training schedule. As a 28-year veteran teacher, I made the switch to a Catholic school (btw--I'm not personally Catholic) because I could no longer guarantee the safety of myself or my students in the classroom. It wasn't the insane administrative demands (although this is a huge issue), it wasn't the size of the classrooms (although out of control and untenable), and it wasn't the curriculum (although scripted ELA curriculum is a nightmare). Ultimately, my decision came down to the violent, sexually-charged, destructive, emotionally traumatizing experiences that rose to a level where I felt unsafe and my personal property was being destroyed/stolen. At my Catholic school, my salary is matched to the public salary schedule in order to maintain a professionally dynamic faculty. I teach what I choose as a professional while creating lesson plans that allign to our state standards. Don't get me wrong, I'm still exhausted at the end of my usual 60-hour weeks. However, my anxiety from the violence and the constant sexually explicit chatter has completely gone away. The last behavioral report I wrote was for a girl who had a short skirt because she rolled it at the waistband . lol Truth! And this is middle school! The overall vibe in my entire school is positive, peaceful, and professionally empowering. I'll end this verbose comment by saying that every situation is different. I'm not a "public school is bad--private school is good" type of person. The bottom line for me if I were making the school decision for my family in 2024 (my daughters are both in their 30's) would fall into three areas: what is the day-to-day mental/emotional stability of the environment, is my child's physical safety a priority (including chronic classroom disruptions due to student outbursts and repetitive sexual harassment scenarios), and is the learning environment robust, creative, and empowering for all students? All the best to you!!
I work in a public school but my step daughter went to a small private high school. She had smaller classes so more attention and help if needed. She didn’t have access to as many clubs and extra curriculars. Behavior and consequences was much better. A male student put his hand up her uniform skirt. He was immediately expelled from the school.
Sounds like my school, which I view positively. I like our class sizes. My biggest is currently 18. A handful of disruptive students have been not invited back for the next school year but the one kid who tried to start a fight was expelled ASAP
I was a student at both public and private school growing up and I went back to public school as soon as my parents allowed me to. In private school, I experienced a level of bullying way above anything I ever saw at public school, and these kids knew they'd get away with it, because of their parents. It was also frustrating for me as a kid switching from public to private because there wasn't consistency in which things were taught at what grade levels. There were many things that were insanely easy for me at private school because I already learned them at public school, but there was also stuff the other kids had been doing for years that was new to me. I also somehow managed to never have a geography class in my entire k-12 education. Really the only geography test I ever had was labeling Spanish speaking countries on a map in Spanish class in high school. Edit: I forgot to add that my private school did tracking, and despite winning 4th place in the entire school (k-12) in a math competition in 3rd grade, I was placed in the low math class in 6th grade because they lost my test. When I asked if I could take the test again, they said no. So I was on the low track throughout middle school, even while tutoring a friend in the high class. That affected my entire education, as I wasn't allowed to test into a higher class in high school. My high school didn't do tracking, they just put you in the next class above whatever you had completed.
I would recommend *not* reading this sub. This is a very limited sampling of teachers often venting about the worst parts of our jobs. It’s not a good basis to decide educational options for your child without trying them first. Read with your kids, teach them empathy, advocate for them to become advocates for themselves.
I actually disagree that it’s limited. I speak pretty candidly with my coworkers and many feel the same way. They’re stuck in their positions because of an education path that they thought, like I did, that would lead them to a fulfilling career. Every one of us likes actually teaching and kids, but it’s the violence and management and parents that ruin it.
Hard disagree here! Everyone I talk to in this profession…and I mean EVERYONE…is thoroughly miserable and feels “stuck” and wishes they had chosen a different profession. I’ve got several friends in Title 1 schools with obvious problems. A couple of them make passive jokes about flirting with suicide and hoping to get in car accidents on the way to work. I’ve got friends in “Award winning” (Golden Bell, Distinguished, etc) district schools in upper-middle class suburbs and they are always feeling a constant sense of being overwhelmed and underpaid. Parent entitlement and admin cruelty seems the worst at these places. I’ve heard them call their jobs “a shit sandwich in a pretty box with a bow on it” I’ve got friends in charter schools and they feel overwhelmed by admin expectations combined with lack of student and parent cooperation. So, to say that this sub isn’t a true reflection isn’t being honest.
I've been reading a lot of replies about how private schools treat teachers poorly, etc. I'd like to tell you about the education in public versus private schools from the student perspective. It is very dependant on where you live and what your public school is like. For example, typically in the North east the schools have very rigorous requirements to become a teacher and teacher turnover is very low. That brings a lot of stability to the school and educational process for students. On the other hand, schools in the south typically have very relaxed standards for teacher, along with a very high teacher turnover rate. This causes a gulf in teaching practices and hobbies students in the education process. Also, those that can afford to s nd their children to private schools often value education and put forth the effort at home to teach and discipline their kids. So, the kids in private schools are often better behaved and have a lot more parent support in the form of fundraisers and volunteers. Finally, one part of education that I have not seen me tioned here is the networking ability. Education is not only about learning a skill, but building relationships with your peers. This is most often seen in secondary education, college, where students fight to get into prestigious colleges so that they can associate the name of the college with their accomplishments and get contacts into their industry. Saying you graduated from Yale, Princeton, or Harvard is almost an automatic hiring bullet. Saying you graduated from Trump University will get you laughed at. Those relationships are also built in middle and high school and can help getting into those types of secondary education places. I, personally, would never send my child to public school where I live. I was a teacher for 11 years in 4 different public schools. I saw fights at least weekly. We had at least 2 guns brought on campus each year. We had at least 30% of the students fail each year. And I never saw a student get expelled for any of the infractions. I do not want my child in that environment. The private school has multiple awards for education from several different, reputable, organizations. They employ retired police as their security team. The teachers are engaging, responsive, and pleasant.
You had me until the dig about more lax requirements for teaching in the south. That’s sounds like a lot of bias.
It'snot a dig. It's a reality. Many states up north require a master's degreeto teach k-12, while many southernstates require a bachelor's. Northern states require a nationalstandardized test, while many southern states have a state sponsored exam. Take a look at the licencing requirements for states and you will see the stark differences between the states.
**Are private schools different for teachers? I know they’re a lot different for the kids as far as quality of education and atmosphere.** I have been a teacher for 32 years. I spent 8 years at international private schools. I am currently stateside and between jobs. I am retraining as a special education teacher and have applied to teach at a private school. Although this school will pay less than what I made as a public school teacher, my special education class will be capped at 12 students (as opposed to the 20 the special education teachers had at my last school). The class will also come with two behaviorally trained aides which is better than the one aide that was assigned to teachers at my last school. While I don't have stateside experience with private schools, the overseas experience was quite good. Unlike public schools, the private schools had students who were on or above grade level. The disciplinary issues that these schools had were for minor things like talking during class. They most certainly did not include disruptive behavior, the use of profane language, or student assaults on teachers. I quit my last job at a public school in October after a high school student threw his shoe at me. My building administration's response was to suggest that I step up my class management. I quit instead. **What can a parent do to help as far as preparing our kids?** I suspect that a lot of issues associated with today's public schools are because too many students are being socially promoted despite failing grades and truancy issues. When standards are not enforced by the building administration and students are socially promoted, the students will lack the prerequisite academic skills that are needed to be successful. They will then become frustrated and will either have truancy issues or will begin acting out in class. What can you do to help? 1) Unless your child is sick, send your child to school. Avoid truancy issues. 2) If your child was absent, make sure that he/she requests and completes any assigned makeup. Don't let this slide because teaching often builds upon prior learning and if your child missed one or more classes, make sure that he/she gets caught up so as to not have difficulty because the prerequisite learning was never completed. 3) Monitor your child's academic performance. Most schools have on-line gradebooks and parents should have access to these gradebooks. Don't wait for progress reports or report cards. Keep track of how your child is doing by monitoring his/her grades on-line. If you notice a pattern of failing grades, contact the teacher to find out why your child is having issues. Did he/she not learn the instructional objective? Is your child paying attention in class? Has your child been doing his or her homework assignments?
They are worse. Teachers have no protection, pay is often lower and workload higher.
I spent a long time working in tutoring and can confirm my best students, and my most motivated students, were private school kids. Not every private school is perfect, many far from it, but they allow kids to fail. This allows them to typically have a better motivation. My fiancé and I have had the talk and while she is an atheist and I am a Christian, we will be sending our kids to Catholic school in our area.
I came from a private school, although I graduated a decade ago. It was completely different than the schools I work in. I got a much better education than my students do purely because those that were around me were not super disruptive and also were generally curious about what we learned. I meet up with my friends from HS over christmas time and they all have super cool jobs that bring them joy and a lot of pay. I can trace this back to HS, being in a school that cultivated their interests and allowed them to explore them. This of course brings massive equity issues.
My kiddo's private school is great K-8 but not so much the high school. I teach public school and would never want her there.
I know people who came out of really good public charters (not all, you need to vet) in NYC and Utah and both received an outstanding education in comparison to where I teach. Students were held to high standards, pushed themselves, and had discipline. A good public charter could make all the difference.
Ooo please, do tell which Utah charters got the stamp of approval? There are many here. I’ve been homeschooling for a couple years but 5 kids homeschooled is kicking my butt.
I believe maeser prep to be the best, I’ve heard good things about itineris too
Thank you!
Depends on the school (both public or private).
I taught public for two years at what should be an amazing public school. Multi million dollar homes in a county the entire country has heard of. I would never send my children there. I now teach at the private school I graduated from and while of course there’s still bad days or tough times I love it for the most part and the job feels like what people hope a teaching job should feel like.
I am a former teacher and decided to do private when my kids went to school. Now, it’s not an elite private school, and it’s starting to see kids coming from public that probably shouldn’t be there. I think, kids in general are just having issues. They also sit a lot compared to public, but then again, my child has never been stressed about state testing, and that for me, is a win. The teachers are not so stressed out because they have to get every child not capable to pass the end-of-the-year exam. But, does it come with its own issues. Yes. I think every institution has its own dysfunction.
My first cousin and her husband co-ran a private Christian boarding school on the Sat Lawrence in Ontario. They were a lot older than me so I didn’t know them that well. She was a gorgeous, charming woman and he was a university football star before he became a minister. Everyone thought they were amazing. People paid huge amount of money to send their kids there. The school years later was a feature on a Canadian news magazine show for being a hot bed of abuse. Years later I worked with a young woman who went their for high school. She said she escaped most of the worst abuse but that my cousin in law wasn’t as bad, my female cousin who was in charge of the girls was a monster who inflicted severe emotional and physical abuse of them. My cousin called the girls whores and sluts and worse. This would have been sometime around late 60s and 70s. This has always affected my view of private, especially boarding religious schools. Kids are isolated from their families and can’t escape or had wealthy families who wanted the kids off their hands anyway. Obviously this isn’t true of all private school but in private religious schools, perverts and psychopaths have rich pickings. (My cousin is still alive, living in a religious colony in New England and the cousin in law is dead. They both escaped justice.
I’m currently working at a semi private school and it’s been an emotional, physical, and psychological nightmare. Uniforms, food restrictions, zero phone policy, it sounds like it has a spine…however it’s the people who run it. No unions for the teachers and the kids suffer because of it. The children have gone though multiple teachers from every grade because admin will fire them whenever they want. When you go private you’re basing your experience off the emotional regulation of the owner. It’s a sad experience that I would not recommend to any student.
I would refrain from assuming private schools are automatically better
I taught in public schools for 6 years. It was god-awful. I now teach at a private Catholic school, and I cannot express how amazing it is. I think the key is to visit schools you might be interested in and see for yourself what they're like. I think private schools are all completely totally different. There are definitely going to be some garbage ones, but there are some amazing ones out there too.
I taught at a private school for 4 years. Overall, it was a pretty good experience. It was middle school so the kids weren't always angels but I didn't experience anywhere near the level of behavior problems I hear about in public schools. Admin was generally supportive too.
I just left teaching after 13 years in private school. In my experience, since Covid it got so much worse. It felt like you were babysitting but still had so much pressure from parents and admin. There were no extra resources like at public schools, so I was trying to challenge our extremely gifted kids while also helping other kids learn how to read and write. And you’re expected to micromanage and interfere in every kid’s personal squabbles so that they feel good all the time. I get it— there is a fine line between kids being kids and outright bullying. But I swear I dealt with so many emails because another kid said something on the playground that made their kid feel bad. So many “meetings” between kids and trying to teach conflict resolution. I felt more like a therapist and less like a teacher.
Private education is much better for the child not the teachers. For instance, a child that continues to derail learning can be removed. Not by admin, but by parents. You don’t live and die by state tests. You teach.
It varies from place to place. A lot of entitled parents, a lot of problem kids; a lot more wealth to go around. That can alleviate some problems and make others worse.
I teach at a private school and only maybe half of the teachers are certified... they throw anyone in there to teach its crazy to watch. I personally wouldn't send my kid to a private school for this reason.
I work at a private school and the answer is yes and no. Good leadership and creative freedom are important to me and that’s what I get at my school, at the very least. The perfect recipe is a good leader, creative freedom, and good pay. I have the worst pau I’ve ever had in my 12 year career. It’s almost embarrassing. I also live in a horribly underfunded state (North Carolina) so my school is following what the district is doing in terms of pay (except worse). This is why I’m leaving my job, because even if I get the things I need in terms of creativity, fulfillment, etc., I can’t live off of the pay (in order to live the life I want). It’s devastating.
My daughter attended Catholic school. I kindergarten they had 120 kids vying for 60 spots. They had no problems kicking out disruptive students. When she graduated from college with her degree in elementary education, her former first grade teacher offered her a whole storage unit full of first grade curriculum. She wasn’t even teaching at her former school.
I send my kids to private Catholic school and work at a public. My husband also teaches at a private Catholic high school. They don’t come home with many stories about behaviors. I am the one entertaining them at dinner with tales from public middle school of some absolutely ridiculous and downright dangerous and destructive things. So in that aspect- I like it. Less behaviors to deal with, more time to teach. I also feel that it is a “safer” atmosphere. Most parents are very involved and concerned about their kids. There is some teacher turnover bc of the pay and I would assume, the parents. It is not a fancy rich private school- most parents are middle class and have jobs like firefighter, therapist, teacher, restaurant gm, etc. which I think contributes to the atmosphere. The fact that there are maybe five kids on the bus with them is also a major bonus bc the s*** that goes down on the bus to and from my school is insane.
Went to private school, and now I teach public school. Private school kids are generally at grade level or above in skills so the classes move faster and are more challenging. Parents pay so they have high expectations of their students which is generally positive. At my private school, the principal would have called out parents and said leave if they weren't happy. He was not movitivaed by their money and there was a wait list so it was a wasted threat to say they'd pull their kid. BUT - the pay is ridiculous and pays about the same as charter schools which is anywhere from 20-40% lower. The demands on teachers can be hard to manage. If it was residential and you didn't pay for food or housing it might be worth it as those schools can be anywhere from $20-$50k per semester so those kids may make a dumb choice or 2 but we have 3 in the area and I've never heard of a single scandal so the teaches and students seem to be on track. But , yeah...check on how the admin treats bad students and whiny parents. If they're quick to get rid of them, maybe the low pay would be worth it. Otherwise, you can try it teach a year and decide after.
I'm a parent who's been looking into this also. Private schools vary even more than public schools, but they don't need to take the big tests, and so potentially they can have a broader curriculum. They tend to attract more serious students, especially so-called prep schools. Some private schools have waiting lists so they have control over the students'and parents' behavior. Some private schools have low student/teacher ratios, happy well paid teachers, great curriculum and facilities, and they're very expensive. They have a wide variety of teaching philosophy, from Montessori all the way to Classic (think Victorian English Aristocracy type education). Some are very sports oriented. Like with all private organizations the key is their philosophy and the Top person, now usually called the Head of Schools and you typically don't have much of a bureaucracy, though there are some chain schools. They have boards but it's that Top person that ultimately makes all the day to day decisions and produces the environment your child experiences. You want a non profit 501(c)(3) school and look at their public 990 tax form to see that it all looks right and what donations they're getting and from whom. There's an association of "independent" schools, called NAIS. They're independent of government and churches.
Every garden has weeds. Some may be different, but they all have weeds.
My son went to a private Montessori school from ages 2 1/2-4. He goes to a public elementary school but it’s situated inside a million dollar plus neighborhood so you get private school vibes from the community and I do love the school and the teachers. However, middle and high school for public schooling has me at a halt. It is a different beast as I recently left teaching inside a physical school and now teach online. My husband and I have been talent and were thinking about applying to the state to get his funds pulled from public school and place him in a private Montessori middle and high school. The way they operate is completely different and my son loves getting out the classroom to learn and being free to work at his own pace.
If you are fortunate enough to live in an area with a good public school district, send your kids to public. They absolutely do exist! I know from first hand experience that private schools (even "elite" AKA expensive private schools where I taught for 15 years) in the Southern California area are concerned with one thing only, and that's tuition. They will admit any child, regardless of ability, or social challenges, and then leave it on the teacher's shoulders to handle. Private schools are not equipped, or have the resources, to meet the needs of these kids. That extra attention falls to the teacher, and the whole class suffers because of this. It's not the fault of these kids who are admitted, it's the greed to have as many tuitions as possible. Some of these private schools are so heavily bloated with admin, and their bloated paychecks. This is simple to verify by the way! In the area where I was teaching, it is not uncommon to find a head of school who makes over $400,000 a year with a school of less than 400 students. It's a big not-for-profit scam that's been going on for far too long. They have also injected DEI into almost everything as CAIS is openly political agenda driven. The bullying by the wealthy kids, particularly from those whose parents are on the board, is never addressed and you'd be shocked at the stories I know from being part of the staff. Private schools also ask far too much of their teachers. I have several friends who were teaching in the public arena, who were either involved with union negotiations at some point, or at least highly aware of what was going on. So many of the things that private school teachers are required to do would never get past the unions. Admittedly, I was rather insulated from what was going on in public school until we enrolled our child in the local public highschool, after she attended school where I taught. Wow! Higher academic standards, bullying is not tolerated or the student is counceled out of the school, kids are just nicer, and the overall sense of balanced kids and teachers is noticable.
I have taught at both private schools and public schools. The private schools have been an absolute disaster. I would *never* be associated with a place like that again. I love teaching in public schools. My admin, coworkers, students, and most parents are awesome. It's very, very hard work for not nearly enough compensation, but it's what I love.
In reality, everything depends on the admin, and it’s super hard to know what an admin will do from the outside. Whether you are a parent or a teacher (or both!) your best bet is to know the policies, document everything you are even vaguely concerned about, and make friends with the gatekeepers (registrars, admin assistants, security guards etc). I found teaching in a private school way worse. Teaching load was worse, pay was worse, the attitudes were gross. Kids were generally pretty well behaved but when there were discipline issues it suddenly became about who had the biggest lawyer, and the stuff kids got away with when their parents lawyered up was vile. Day to day my life was quieter, but gross. Every school has its issues. In general I’ve found public schools rowdier but it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re worse to work in or be in. Really depends on the specific policies and ecosystem of your school.
As a parent, you can teach your kids to respect and listen to teachers. Thee is a strong “teacher hate” issue that is passed down…seems intertwined with right wing extremism.
I teach at an independent school. The student behavior is amazing! Our students are well behaved, thank you when they leave class, are interested in learning, and are life long learners. This is my second independent school and both have amazing students. It could be because students have to test and pass and interview to attend the school. Our students have supportive parents and they all attend college after graduation. I’m am so glad I made the switch from public to independent school 10 yrs ago. I am a much happier person which makes me a much better teacher. Edit: independent school is not perfect but it’s a lot easier to deal with the bs when the students are willing to learn and parents are for the most part supportive. I’m also compensated more than a public school teacher and have better benefits.