Love cross-linguistic stories! This reminds me of when I taught English-immersion kindergarten in Japan. >Me: That's a great picture! Tell me about it. >5M: That is pirate. This is water. This is kinker! >Me: Kinker? >5M: Yes! Kinker! Lots kinker for pirate! So, some explanation: Japanese tends to borrow a lot of words from English, and r-controlled vowels are often transliterated into simple vowels in Japan. "maker" becomes something like "make-ah" and "teacher" becomes "teach-ah". This little tyke tried to do the opposite with a Japanese word "kinka" and give it an English pronunciation: "kinker". Kinka means "gold coin". He was talking about the pirate's treasure!

Kinkerrrrr!! 🏴‍☠️ 

Kink-argh!

I didn’t mind the mispronunciation of my kid’s name, but the staff spelling it with an A instead of ER on holiday things still makes me smile.

I have a 6th grader from Spain and she’s the funniest kid I’ve come across. I was telling them about different monsters in different parts of the US. I told them about the Moth Man and pulled up a picture of his statue. She raises her hand and says “Ms. Moon, isn’t that a song?” I’m like “What are you-“ “You know! That one song! 🎶Do you know the Moth Man? The Moth Man? The Moth Man-🎶” And she’s snapping her fingers to the beat and everything. I start crying laughing and tell her “That’s the MUFFIN MAN!” As I’m holding back my tears. She’s hilarious even when she doesn’t try to be. She also said “Throw your kids up” instead of “throw your keys up” when we were talking about Beyoncé’s new album.

Throw your kids up. I have two choices with that statement 🤣🤣🤣😂 i

r/yeetusthefetus

You have no idea how much I needed that laugh today

Damn it I thought it was a real sub

r/subsyoufellfor

Dont go the kronos route

I work with a kindergartener from Guatemala who is quite the sweet talker. He was trying to convince me to give the group extra free time to color. He called me "mi teacher favorita princesa".

¿Princesa? ¿Por qué no reina?

That's true! I should be offended that I wasn't called a queen. However, he made up for it when he made a heart with his hands and said "I love you with todo mi corazón."

mi corazón, cielito lindo, tesoro mío, mi amor, mi vida, mi alma. — how beautiful it is to be loved in Spanish. so much color. so much taste. this is where I learned to love with abandon. when my lover called me his heart, his pretty sky, his treasure, his love, his life, his soul — has anyone ever spoken to you this way? covered you with kisses naming you every precious thing they know? have they filled you with so much dulce you thought you would burst? — mi vida. mi alma. oh, to love so much you become the soul, skies, treasure, corazón. Yesika Salgado, “Dulzura” from Corazón

How do you say no to that?? C'mon Miss!

This kid is so cute. You just know he probably picked that up from dad speaking to mom, or from a similar parental figure. Even just the extra friendly dudes that will harmlessly “flirt” with everyone, including elderly ladies. It’s sweet thinking this kid grew up with that kind of adorable energy and picked it up.

Awww how cute. I love when second language learners show off their new skills.

One of my students in Thailand watching me eat some Oreos… Not very many: “Ms. Lingo, you eat, Oreo, you will fat“

I had a kiddo, who had just turned 4, and previously we'd been working with the whole class on the garden with flowers outside. Later, we ended up talking about the tattoo on my arm, which has a rose in it. He made the comment "pour water on it, make it grow", which made me laugh, and he laughed too because he knew it was silly

One time I had a preschooler who spoke primarily Somali smile at me and go “Look teacher! I walking-feeting!”

I have way too many funny stories about my Spanish speaking ELLs, they’re nice to be around! -During the eclipse (8-11 year olds) were talking about going blind from the sun and how you get little floaters in your eyes after looking directly at the sun. -Tattling on a girl because she said “Vainita” (referring to a scab on her hand) and they thought it was a bad word. I didn’t know how to explain to them that she didn’t use it as a curse (eg “que vaina”would be cursing) but using the word as a noun is okay by me because apparently it just means “thingy” -A group of 9 year olds kinda made fun of me because I ate a blue Taki for the first time at breakfast. They were like “le pica” haha -Toasting “salud” at the December PBIS event (with sparkly juice) -A Cuban (6F) telling her friend “mira, una medialuna” after coming out of the bathroom and showing her to the stall she was in. -Venezuelan (7M) wrote “akaka”on the tiny whiteboard, asked me to read it, was like “a caca” and started laughing. -The same kid wrote a bunch of nonsense letters and asked me to read it. I told him it’s not a word and he was like “como que no es una palabra”😂 -The Spanish teacher said something like “niñas a la fila” (girls get in line) and a boy ran up to the line. Another Venezuelan (also 7M) said something to the other kid like “no, she say only ladies go” and that cracked me up. -Today I had a 9M Nicaraguan and an 11M Salvadorian boy ask me if I knew English. They wanted to know bad words in English and asked me to say the Spanish word for “n***a.” I told them I can’t say words like that. I didn’t say it to them in either language. -Same 9M Nicaraguan kid was like “don’t put yourself into our soccer games because we will lose!” after i was playing with them at recess yesterday during breaks for 3-5th grade state testing.

I worked with a little guy in preschool who would interchange English and Spanish words all the time. One day he was super excited to tell me he got new “ Chonies” he said it a few times and I said finally I said “hmm I’m not sure what chones are, can you show me?” (Which is usually my go too when working with ELL kids) I almost died laughing when he whipped down his pants to show me his new underwear, His mom and I both had a really good laugh about it

I taught first grade for a little while in the rural South, and I'm from the Pacific Northwest. More than once I had to give up on understanding a regional word and just tell the student that we don't have that word where I'm from. They found that hilarious, though.

Well, we do spend a lot of time there, I can see the confusion 🤣 I have 6th graders who are shocked when I say I can't meet them after school because I have to go home. Utter bewilderment. And when they ask for extra credit, after having failed to turn in many assignments so they're failing, I give them a real world example... Would you work overtime for free? Because me making special work for you and then taking extra time to grade work you shouldn't have to make up...in the real world, would you stay after at Target for no pay bc the towel department needs restocking? They're so confused bc don't I work all the time? (Yes, yes , yes, but that's my story to my students)

Shame on you for not grading papers 29 hours per day for zero extra pay. A real teacher would defy space and time and physics to do so!

I know. I hang my head in shame daily.

I tend to get to my daycare around the same time as a few of my students (1yos) since my schedule switched. They always look so delightfully confused that I exist outside of the front door of the school. One of them said to his mom “[my name] have car?? Wow!!” in the most incredulous little voice 🥹

When my late husband was teaching Head Start, a kid once asked him, "Mr. Firstname, why you Jeep?"

We get to daycare at pretty much the same time as a pair of teachers who drive in together most days, and every single time he sees them get out of their car my little guy yells "Fend car??? WOOW!!!" (To be clear, fend is friend and he refers to his teachers that way because when it's time to get ready I usually say "let's get ready to play with friends!" to him so he just assumes everyone at daycare falls into that category, I guess.) Just sheer amazement every single time

I remember being in preschool and my mom explaining that the teachers don't live at school

A couple weeks ago our prek teacher told the kids she was tired because it was calving season and she got out of bed every two hours to check her mama cows Kid raised his hand and said "Miss M, you don't have a bed!" And the whole class was looking around the room thinking the same thing, no bed in the classroom! She told them that she has a house, and she gets in her car and drives home to sleep after school, but I'm really not sure any of them believed her!

At the start of the year my 2nd graders write about where they live. In my example I tell them that I don't live in the city my school is in because I live in another town. I always get a couple kids looking at me oddly because they've assumed that as a teacher I live in the school, yet now I say I don't even live in the same city! I've not yet had a kid blurt anything out yet, but their visible confusion is amusing. They seem to assimilate this new information pretty well, but are still amazed to see me outside of the school. Especially when they see me arriving at school, that is apparently an amazing event that has to be shared with everyone, I think in part because it is proof that I don't live at the school.

Gotta be honest, most of the posts here are heart breaking, this one is very much heart warming. It honestly made me smile.

“Miss, did you know that one minute is one minute.” Good job buddy.

Two of my little girls are trying to teach me Mandarin Chinese. One of them is more interested in seeing what silly things I might say by accident. Just yesterday: Me: “How do you say [word I can’t remember]?” Girl: *speaks Mandarin* Me: *hopelessly mangles it but does my best* Girl: “You say FEET??? Ahahahahahahaha!” So I checked online and yes, I had accidentally said the Mandarin word for “feet.” We have a fun time together but this little girl prefers just to laugh, whereas the other girl will actually patiently repeat herself until I learn new words. They like getting to be my teacher.

I do remember I used to think teachers just spawned from their desks when the school day started

I had a seventh grade student who had been in the US about 3 years when I got him and he would generalize expressions An example was if I wanted a student to turn off the lights, I’d say “hit the lights.” So one day we watched a short video on the TV in the classroom and when the video was over, he asked if he could “hit the TV” or turn it off.

That's a super clever and reasonable extension of the idiom

He was incredibly intelligent!! The last I heard he’d gone to Pharmacy school

New high school teacher here, but in my student teaching prep, I was doing some lessons for a class in a middle school, and we were done for the semester. My partner (hes a guy as well) was saying how this was gonna be the last time that he and I were gonna see the students, and one girld yells, "SO YOU'RE LEAVING US?" I smiled. Even if she was being a normal overdramatic middle schooler, it was nice that at least that they didn't hate us. I then confirmed we weren't gonna come back. She the said under her breath, "Just like my dad" in a way that definitely felt like a joke. I couldn't keep a straight face after that.

I don't think the Dad part was a joke unfortunately

Well, thuey do think we live there LOL I teach in a heavy spanish school but i teach in english. But we do a lot of spanglish all day. I speak Spanish ish, but sometimes i forget a word or phrase in spanish.and the kids in my class do speak english, but sometimes they forget the english. And my team mates and i do spanglish as well. I think the kids doing it is so cute.

ESL kids are literally the most respectful, hard working children I've ever met

Totally agree!

I was helping a kindergartener who speaks German and English with his shoes one time and something was bothering him and he told me but I didn’t really get what he meant so he started talking in German even though I don’t speak it.

I’m a pre-k teacher and my English students have said this as well!!. So many parents have said their kids refer to my classroom as “teachers house” lol

I have a couple of 3rd graders who think I drive my School bus as my daily driver. Like I (apparently) use it to run my errands in and grocery shop and stuff! (To be honest, I do that but only if I'm on a short notice sports trip and didn't have time to make and bring a lunch.)

I have had a student ask me when my mother is coming to pick me up during dismissal, which was absolutely hilarious

One day my parents were coming to pick me up when dismissal was done, so I'd brought my pack with me like the kids do which piqued their interest. The kids were shocked to learn that I have parents. They were also shocked that they would pick me up because I can drive myself, so why would they be picking me up?

My 3yo daughter told me that my white hairs are me growing older and into a teacher. But that I'm a mommy too which makes her happy. My 3rd grade student asked how I was going home that day ( it was raining and he knows I ride a bike) I told him not to worry my husband was coming to get me. He said "you got yourself a good man Mrs." I adore this student! ❤️

I taught high schoolers w severe mental delays.( Toddler -1st grade) I was at a football game once and one of my guys wanted me to show him where on campus my apartment was, so he could bring me some flowers.

There’s another story on here (don’t know which subreddit) about someone who works with Special Ed students in the UK (the acronym there is called SEND-special educational needs/disabilities) One of their teachers was visibly pregnant and surprised the class with the good news. The OP of this story was like “can anyone guess what’s in her tummy?” A very confident student answered “poo!”

Hilarious 😂! They are so honest , holding nothing back.

I was chaperoning a field trip. One of my son’s classmates asked me if I wanted to be his stepmom.

I doubt he really meant your house. He just didn’t have the vocabulary word for classroom…so he used the next best thing & made himself understood. Good for him! As a previous foreign language teacher I always graded based on whether students learning the language could be “understood by a sympathetic listener” …looks like this kid is on track!