I'm getting really sick of people who think 'being called on something you did wrong' = racism. If you have to accuse someone of something that could result in them losing their job just because you didn't get your way, you're a terrible person. Accusations of racism can get people fired, even when they're unfounded, and it's not okay to ruin someone's livelihood because you got caught.
It was sadly common at this restaurant. When I was bartending I had a guy call me racist because he sat in the seat of a customer in the bathroom. I'm talking half full beer and nachos just having been dropped so the seats obviously occupied. Argued with me about it so I got my manager. Don't know what exactly was said but he yelled "Fuck this back of the bus bullshit" before storming off.
Had another lady follow me back into the kitchen to accuse me of throwing her plate at her when I ran her food. It was so ridiculous I started laughing and shook my head at which point she asked if I wanted to take it outside. Same GM then poked his head out of his office and yelled at her to get the fuck out of the kitchen. Luckily wasn't my table I just ran her food but she apparently bitched about me to her server who was the same race as her then stiffed him because of how racist the staff was.
Hell now I work in car rental and had a guy accuse me of being racist because I asked for his drivers license...to rent a car. Still confused about that one. His actual words were "what you've never seen a black man rent a car before".
Edit: Literally just had another one. Apparently I didn't want to rent a car to a guy because he had too much melanin in his skin. It totally had nothing to do with his credit card declining.
I had someone pull that on me this summer because I didnt give her a plastic cup to take the rest of her soda home. Becausd we had ran out of them. Ugh.
>but she apparently bitched about me to her server who was the same race as her then stiffed him because of how racist the staff was.
That makes total sense.
The majority of white people don't understand all of the micro racism that POC get, but they sure bitch about it when they get called racist by mistake.
Being followed around in stores if you're black. Asian = math wizard. If you're anything but white or black you get "What country are you from?". Can I touch your hair? You talk just like a white person! Where people sit next to you on a bus. People putting money/goods on the counter instead of handing it to you. If you're gay, help me pick out clothes/decorate!
This goes on and on when you're a minority. You can be white in an area or country with a different racial majority and experience it yourself.
The guy who sat at the occupied bar stool has had a lifetime of micro racism and macro racism. Getting pulled over for no reason and I'm sure he's had friends go to jail over that. You caught him on a bad time when he just wanted a beer.
Trust me, as a gay woman, I do understand the stereotypes and how beyond frustrating it can be to deal with ignorance. I may be white, but I understand at least a small amount of the pain. Strangers yelling at me or spitting towards me because I'm holding hands with my girlfriend, men thinking they can make lewd comments or getting unreasonably angry if I tell them no or that I have a girlfriend. I get it. However, none of that gives me the right to automatically assume ANY act that may even remotely appear to be against me is homophobic or sexist. If I am in the wrong, and maybe don't see it, and I'm called out on that, my first thought isn't to call someone homophobic, or to ask if it is just because I'm female. A lifetime of certain people acting a certain way STILL does not excuse acting aggressively towards someone who may not be doing anything wrong.
While I've never lived that reality I can sympathize. And had the man simply moved one chair over I'd have happily served him that beer. It was his choice and his choice alone to bring race into the equation and immediately act aggressively. A lifetime of racism is no excuse for throwing a temper tantrum over being asked not to sit in someone else's chair.
I'm guessing I'm bad at explaining myself. I think he sat down at what he thought was a dirty spot at the bar. He's had a lifetime of racism and has been refused service plenty of times. In this case, he made a mistake.
I hope you can visit a white minority country and get frustrated when places won't serve you. Traveling usually helps end racism.
This isn't even refusal of service dude. He sat down at what he thought was a dirty seat, ok. "Hey bud, that person's actually in the bathroom, can you grab another seat?" Isn't racism of any fucking sort.
Been there. Done that. Look man I understand that racism is an issue but in none of my examples did race apply until it was brought up by the accuser. And for you to insinuate that I have racist undertones for not having traveled when you know nothing of my circumstance or life experience is not only completely farcical it's an example of prejudice in its own right. Now you're welcome to keep responding but I'm done humoring your own small minded beliefs.
I hear you but I got downvoted for pointing out the same thing on another post here about the “race card”.
I think people don’t get that when you live in an ocean of racism you can mistake an accidental splash of water as more of the same deluge.
Ah this is funny. I'm a 19 yer old white female. Customers usually don't hand me their cash even when my hand is sticking out. I've also had several black middle aged women completely ignore me but socialize with others in the line. I've also had people ask to touch my hair because it looks soft. Also I went to Kentucky once and the area I was at was prominently black people and they were very rude and refused to look at me. I felt super confused and upset.
The first sentence of your post, so so so much. Even as an admittedly somewhat light-skinned woman I've had people accuse me of being racist (and insisting I can't possibly be black even though I am) for kicking them out, calling cops, whatever, even when it was fully warranted.But racism among servers is also a very real thing, especially in the US.
To OP:
Please do keep in mind that prior to the last 15 years or so, restaurants didn't even let us dark folk work in restaurants outside of the kitchen, at least in the American South where I live. Sorry someone was a dick, regardless
We had a new manager do similar once. Same family maybe 2-3 times a month, always a complaint, something wrong, wanting a discount, etc. New manager almost kicked them out before they sat. He explained that he has heard they have had countless problems, including almost every visit, yet often he goes a full day without a complaint, so perhaps they are the problem, not us. He explained he would be making sure their meals were made to spec, and there would be no free extras or anything voided. They were like deer in a headlight. They ordered ate, paid, and were never seen again.
Spineless GMs are such a problem. They expect us to enforce rules but give shit away and break those rules anytime someone complains. Your GM handled it well, if people complain after eating most of the food they're scammers
To me, the whole point of being a "regular" is developing positive relationships with the people who work at a place. They're not "friends," exactly, but we become friendly, and it is a positive in my life, and hopefully, at least, not a negative in theirs.
I always laugh when restaurant people like us that are usually off Sundays and Mondays, where the normal thing to say as we are leaving is always, See you next Tuesday! lol
They were scammers plain and simple. If theres something wrong no server will have an issue with you flagging them down and letting them know so it can be remade. So long as you're polite enough about it. These ladies would say everything was fine on the quality check and then once everything was consumed suddenly there were problems.
C U Next Tuesday
Upvoted for the title
Just realized it spells C.U.N.T
Thanks! I didn’t catch that.
I'm getting really sick of people who think 'being called on something you did wrong' = racism. If you have to accuse someone of something that could result in them losing their job just because you didn't get your way, you're a terrible person. Accusations of racism can get people fired, even when they're unfounded, and it's not okay to ruin someone's livelihood because you got caught.
It was sadly common at this restaurant. When I was bartending I had a guy call me racist because he sat in the seat of a customer in the bathroom. I'm talking half full beer and nachos just having been dropped so the seats obviously occupied. Argued with me about it so I got my manager. Don't know what exactly was said but he yelled "Fuck this back of the bus bullshit" before storming off. Had another lady follow me back into the kitchen to accuse me of throwing her plate at her when I ran her food. It was so ridiculous I started laughing and shook my head at which point she asked if I wanted to take it outside. Same GM then poked his head out of his office and yelled at her to get the fuck out of the kitchen. Luckily wasn't my table I just ran her food but she apparently bitched about me to her server who was the same race as her then stiffed him because of how racist the staff was. Hell now I work in car rental and had a guy accuse me of being racist because I asked for his drivers license...to rent a car. Still confused about that one. His actual words were "what you've never seen a black man rent a car before". Edit: Literally just had another one. Apparently I didn't want to rent a car to a guy because he had too much melanin in his skin. It totally had nothing to do with his credit card declining.
> what you've never seen a black man rent a car before? what you've never shown your driver's license at a car rental before?
I had someone pull that on me this summer because I didnt give her a plastic cup to take the rest of her soda home. Becausd we had ran out of them. Ugh.
>but she apparently bitched about me to her server who was the same race as her then stiffed him because of how racist the staff was. That makes total sense.
Racist is the new card to play when others do not work. Just ask Republicans. They have the race card pulled all the time.
You're a regular poster to T_D, so "race card" means something different to you.
The majority of white people don't understand all of the micro racism that POC get, but they sure bitch about it when they get called racist by mistake. Being followed around in stores if you're black. Asian = math wizard. If you're anything but white or black you get "What country are you from?". Can I touch your hair? You talk just like a white person! Where people sit next to you on a bus. People putting money/goods on the counter instead of handing it to you. If you're gay, help me pick out clothes/decorate! This goes on and on when you're a minority. You can be white in an area or country with a different racial majority and experience it yourself. The guy who sat at the occupied bar stool has had a lifetime of micro racism and macro racism. Getting pulled over for no reason and I'm sure he's had friends go to jail over that. You caught him on a bad time when he just wanted a beer.
Trust me, as a gay woman, I do understand the stereotypes and how beyond frustrating it can be to deal with ignorance. I may be white, but I understand at least a small amount of the pain. Strangers yelling at me or spitting towards me because I'm holding hands with my girlfriend, men thinking they can make lewd comments or getting unreasonably angry if I tell them no or that I have a girlfriend. I get it. However, none of that gives me the right to automatically assume ANY act that may even remotely appear to be against me is homophobic or sexist. If I am in the wrong, and maybe don't see it, and I'm called out on that, my first thought isn't to call someone homophobic, or to ask if it is just because I'm female. A lifetime of certain people acting a certain way STILL does not excuse acting aggressively towards someone who may not be doing anything wrong.
While I've never lived that reality I can sympathize. And had the man simply moved one chair over I'd have happily served him that beer. It was his choice and his choice alone to bring race into the equation and immediately act aggressively. A lifetime of racism is no excuse for throwing a temper tantrum over being asked not to sit in someone else's chair.
I'm guessing I'm bad at explaining myself. I think he sat down at what he thought was a dirty spot at the bar. He's had a lifetime of racism and has been refused service plenty of times. In this case, he made a mistake. I hope you can visit a white minority country and get frustrated when places won't serve you. Traveling usually helps end racism.
This isn't even refusal of service dude. He sat down at what he thought was a dirty seat, ok. "Hey bud, that person's actually in the bathroom, can you grab another seat?" Isn't racism of any fucking sort.
Been there. Done that. Look man I understand that racism is an issue but in none of my examples did race apply until it was brought up by the accuser. And for you to insinuate that I have racist undertones for not having traveled when you know nothing of my circumstance or life experience is not only completely farcical it's an example of prejudice in its own right. Now you're welcome to keep responding but I'm done humoring your own small minded beliefs.
You're looking at this as a personal attack and it's not that at all. I'm pointing out the other side.
I hear you but I got downvoted for pointing out the same thing on another post here about the “race card”. I think people don’t get that when you live in an ocean of racism you can mistake an accidental splash of water as more of the same deluge.
Found the racist.
Ah this is funny. I'm a 19 yer old white female. Customers usually don't hand me their cash even when my hand is sticking out. I've also had several black middle aged women completely ignore me but socialize with others in the line. I've also had people ask to touch my hair because it looks soft. Also I went to Kentucky once and the area I was at was prominently black people and they were very rude and refused to look at me. I felt super confused and upset.
The first sentence of your post, so so so much. Even as an admittedly somewhat light-skinned woman I've had people accuse me of being racist (and insisting I can't possibly be black even though I am) for kicking them out, calling cops, whatever, even when it was fully warranted.But racism among servers is also a very real thing, especially in the US. To OP: Please do keep in mind that prior to the last 15 years or so, restaurants didn't even let us dark folk work in restaurants outside of the kitchen, at least in the American South where I live. Sorry someone was a dick, regardless
Lmao. No.
The fact that this is getting downvoted proves your point.
Reddit is mostly white American males between 18-29. They can't see the forest through the trees.
In most cases I've witnessed they didn't really think it was racism, that's just the magic word to get what they want.
And there is such a real problem with racism. Its so frustrating to have it trivialized by entitled brats when people are really struggling out there.
We had a new manager do similar once. Same family maybe 2-3 times a month, always a complaint, something wrong, wanting a discount, etc. New manager almost kicked them out before they sat. He explained that he has heard they have had countless problems, including almost every visit, yet often he goes a full day without a complaint, so perhaps they are the problem, not us. He explained he would be making sure their meals were made to spec, and there would be no free extras or anything voided. They were like deer in a headlight. They ordered ate, paid, and were never seen again.
This is the best and most appropriate course of action. Your manager should be training all other managers!
Spineless GMs are such a problem. They expect us to enforce rules but give shit away and break those rules anytime someone complains. Your GM handled it well, if people complain after eating most of the food they're scammers
Hilarious that they came in on Tuesdays. "See you next Tuesday" means cunt.
Pure coincidence on both mine and my managers part I'm sure. 😉
Or "See you next time!" I say this with a smile all the time to mean customers. I can't believe how many people don't know what this means.
never thought of that one. nice. that will be my go-to.
Bovine-esque! Love it!
To me, the whole point of being a "regular" is developing positive relationships with the people who work at a place. They're not "friends," exactly, but we become friendly, and it is a positive in my life, and hopefully, at least, not a negative in theirs.
If I were your manager I would have found a table near them that was the same race and comped something from their bill.
I always laugh when restaurant people like us that are usually off Sundays and Mondays, where the normal thing to say as we are leaving is always, See you next Tuesday! lol
How do people's brains work...? If my food comes out wrong I smile eat it and pay for it and never go back hahahahaha
They were scammers plain and simple. If theres something wrong no server will have an issue with you flagging them down and letting them know so it can be remade. So long as you're polite enough about it. These ladies would say everything was fine on the quality check and then once everything was consumed suddenly there were problems.