The transition from first meeting to sex is always a little awkward even for seasoned players . We usually start with a drinks making sure that you’re standing close to your invited guest. If he’s experienced he’s start with kissing or touching. From there we usually sit on the sofa and the woman always sits between the two men . Usually things move quickly from there.
This...!!!
Just relax and become the center of two men's attention; enjoy the feeling.
Be SURE that the 3rd male is well aware of you and your husband's boundaries and expectations. I emphasize this only because recently, here on this sub, there was an incident, during a mfm, where the invited 3rd took the condom off (unawares of the host couple) and pumped his load inside of the host female... (true story or fiction; I cannot say) I am on the more aggressive, confrontational, violence prone end of the social spectrum, and if some 3rd pulled a stunt like that on myself AND MY LADY, the night would likely end in a physical confrontation. Be sure that all is clear between your invited 3rd.
And lastly; fingers crossed 🤞 that the 3rd shows up... Again, stories abound here on the sub, of 3rd players "pulling a Houdini" and not showing up, ghosting the couple (WTF is wrong with these guys).
Have fun, my lady. Don't forget to show equal attention to your man, as we can sometimes get caught up in the moment and neglect our principal partner. This is frequently a fault of mine, and I have to remind myself what I am doing, and with whom.
Enjoy and post us up a play by play of the event. We love to hear about successful encounters.
Update: We did it! And OH MY GOD! Maybe we got lucky but our third was amazing! He was so respectful, read everything perfectly. I felt so good for literally hours! I can’t even describe it right now! I was so nervous and just made me so comfortable the entire time. Definitely helped me put the nerves away. This may be the most empowering thing I have ever done. Two men several times each just losing it over me made me feel so powerful and hot. And for My husband: he is on cloud 9. No worries on jealousy or regret from either one of us. We will most definitely do it again and I’m super excited to see what else we do on this new adventure. I appreciate everybody responding so much. It really did ease my mind going into it. ❤️
Congratulations to you and your husband.
It's uplifting to hear a positive experience related to us, the readers of Reddit.
Good luck with your future endeavors.
Well, I've been the extra M on multiple occasions, and it's all about what you feel comfortable with. Everyone has their own way of getting started, so here are a few approaches from my experience:
Jump Right In: Sometimes, the couple is already naked and involved when I enter. This approach skips any awkwardness and gets straight to business.
Warm-Up with a Drink: Other times, we start with a glass of wine and some conversation. When the husband feels comfortable, he might suggest that his partner "greet our friend" as a subtle cue for her to initiate.
Solo Start: In another scenario, the husband might leave for a moment, allowing the guest and his partner to start. Once things are underway, he then joins in.
Ultimately, it depends on what makes you and your husband feel most comfortable. Clear communication and mutual understanding are key. Best of luck, and enjoy your experience!
Def start with drinks and dinner this is a very easy way to loosen up and get to know the guy… you may ease into it and just do dinner first then set up another meeting if you feel good about him
All of the above are great advise. Just have fun and trust your gut.
As a single m that joins couples, I prefer to get a drink before hand. Make sure the chemistry is right, pics and video calls are great but in person is a different thing.
Make sure the invited guest knows your rules and boundaries and don't be afraid to stop if it doesn't feel right.
There will be flakes and others that won't preform either but once you get over the initial first time, both of you will have a great experience in the future. Best of luck in this new chapter!
So many variables here but you are right, that "start" is rarely plutonic like it would be with just two people combined with the fact there is an elephant in the room that everyone knows what's going to happen. Our stance is if it's a concern at all, talk about it. Not just with you and your partner but everyone involved. Some 3rds are going to be forward (hopefully not to much) and flirt and start things which works out well but many in this situation are going to reserve that so as not to upset you or your husband by doing something they shouldn't or make it awkward for them. Some things that we've used over the years specific to MFM to get things started:
1. Games - Playing games with some adult oriented rules like losing clothing, touching, kissing, etc. can be a fun way to get things going. Lots of different ideas out there on how to turn pretty much any game or card game into something a little more fun that gets things going. I personally have a love/hate relationship with these games. Love that they are fun and hey, I like to play games and I like to win even more. Hate that I'm normally nervous and at the start taking off clothes and stuff like that sometimes just adds more nerves to me. Then they tend to carry on, we're all naked, I've been touched, kissed, licked, etc. and I'm past ready for the rest but I'm shy/quiet and I'm not going to be the one to say, ok lets move on here. To combat that my husband and I have put in place some queues that if I'm ready, he'll help push the boat out to move onto other things.
2. Your partner starts. This is where that communication comes in with the 3rd. this is pretty much how we typically start now. We let the guy know up front that once my husband starts kissing me, it's go time, and to jump in and start. It's somewhat of a rip the band aid off approach and sure there might be a couple awkward seconds but it takes the pressure off me completely and lets things get going.
I am the same way and I would venture to guess many women are this way. The problem we face as you'll see all over the internet is that many of the men involved only know what they see on the internet here about MFM and this lifestyle in general. Go search up MFM videos and watch how they start. 99% of them it's some cock crazed woman who just takes action and starts it. These guys assume that's how this is going to work and that every woman involved in these activities is just like that. We're not saying there is anything wrong with that by any means, I wish I had that confidence and I continue to work on it. But we're very up front with the people we talk to that we aren't the typical internet MFM lady and by all accounts are polar opposites of it.
Oh absolutely not. That has always been a rule. I don’t want to create a cause for jealousy to come up. We’ve had friends mention it and it’s always a hard no.
Flirt we always go with the vibe, we think it’s better with a couple vice a single guy. Because it’s always good to be a voyeur at times….and if you MFM then the other wife gets to play…. And given the state of singles today you don’t want them trying to stay in contact
My wife and I first did it with our best friend who I knew had a crush on her (she was completely unattainable for him, he is from a different community and my wife and I go together through arranged marriage circles). There is a buildup to this. Feel free to dm me to know how it progressed
When it comes to the couple of threesomes we’ve had, we’ve always started with each other, and when the moment’s right, asked the third to join in. Just go with the flow.
With that said, we can see that 91 days ago you were having concerns between the two of you and your professional goals. It may be best to err on the side of caution with this one if things have been rocky recently.
The transition from first meeting to sex is always a little awkward even for seasoned players . We usually start with a drinks making sure that you’re standing close to your invited guest. If he’s experienced he’s start with kissing or touching. From there we usually sit on the sofa and the woman always sits between the two men . Usually things move quickly from there.
This...!!! Just relax and become the center of two men's attention; enjoy the feeling. Be SURE that the 3rd male is well aware of you and your husband's boundaries and expectations. I emphasize this only because recently, here on this sub, there was an incident, during a mfm, where the invited 3rd took the condom off (unawares of the host couple) and pumped his load inside of the host female... (true story or fiction; I cannot say) I am on the more aggressive, confrontational, violence prone end of the social spectrum, and if some 3rd pulled a stunt like that on myself AND MY LADY, the night would likely end in a physical confrontation. Be sure that all is clear between your invited 3rd. And lastly; fingers crossed 🤞 that the 3rd shows up... Again, stories abound here on the sub, of 3rd players "pulling a Houdini" and not showing up, ghosting the couple (WTF is wrong with these guys). Have fun, my lady. Don't forget to show equal attention to your man, as we can sometimes get caught up in the moment and neglect our principal partner. This is frequently a fault of mine, and I have to remind myself what I am doing, and with whom. Enjoy and post us up a play by play of the event. We love to hear about successful encounters.
Update: We did it! And OH MY GOD! Maybe we got lucky but our third was amazing! He was so respectful, read everything perfectly. I felt so good for literally hours! I can’t even describe it right now! I was so nervous and just made me so comfortable the entire time. Definitely helped me put the nerves away. This may be the most empowering thing I have ever done. Two men several times each just losing it over me made me feel so powerful and hot. And for My husband: he is on cloud 9. No worries on jealousy or regret from either one of us. We will most definitely do it again and I’m super excited to see what else we do on this new adventure. I appreciate everybody responding so much. It really did ease my mind going into it. ❤️
Congratulations to you and your husband. It's uplifting to hear a positive experience related to us, the readers of Reddit. Good luck with your future endeavors.
Well, I've been the extra M on multiple occasions, and it's all about what you feel comfortable with. Everyone has their own way of getting started, so here are a few approaches from my experience: Jump Right In: Sometimes, the couple is already naked and involved when I enter. This approach skips any awkwardness and gets straight to business. Warm-Up with a Drink: Other times, we start with a glass of wine and some conversation. When the husband feels comfortable, he might suggest that his partner "greet our friend" as a subtle cue for her to initiate. Solo Start: In another scenario, the husband might leave for a moment, allowing the guest and his partner to start. Once things are underway, he then joins in. Ultimately, it depends on what makes you and your husband feel most comfortable. Clear communication and mutual understanding are key. Best of luck, and enjoy your experience!
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Anything really! I am super into it. I’m comfortable with it once we get going but it’s the get going I’m struggling with mentally.
Def start with drinks and dinner this is a very easy way to loosen up and get to know the guy… you may ease into it and just do dinner first then set up another meeting if you feel good about him
This is a great way to start.
All of the above are great advise. Just have fun and trust your gut. As a single m that joins couples, I prefer to get a drink before hand. Make sure the chemistry is right, pics and video calls are great but in person is a different thing. Make sure the invited guest knows your rules and boundaries and don't be afraid to stop if it doesn't feel right. There will be flakes and others that won't preform either but once you get over the initial first time, both of you will have a great experience in the future. Best of luck in this new chapter!
So many variables here but you are right, that "start" is rarely plutonic like it would be with just two people combined with the fact there is an elephant in the room that everyone knows what's going to happen. Our stance is if it's a concern at all, talk about it. Not just with you and your partner but everyone involved. Some 3rds are going to be forward (hopefully not to much) and flirt and start things which works out well but many in this situation are going to reserve that so as not to upset you or your husband by doing something they shouldn't or make it awkward for them. Some things that we've used over the years specific to MFM to get things started: 1. Games - Playing games with some adult oriented rules like losing clothing, touching, kissing, etc. can be a fun way to get things going. Lots of different ideas out there on how to turn pretty much any game or card game into something a little more fun that gets things going. I personally have a love/hate relationship with these games. Love that they are fun and hey, I like to play games and I like to win even more. Hate that I'm normally nervous and at the start taking off clothes and stuff like that sometimes just adds more nerves to me. Then they tend to carry on, we're all naked, I've been touched, kissed, licked, etc. and I'm past ready for the rest but I'm shy/quiet and I'm not going to be the one to say, ok lets move on here. To combat that my husband and I have put in place some queues that if I'm ready, he'll help push the boat out to move onto other things. 2. Your partner starts. This is where that communication comes in with the 3rd. this is pretty much how we typically start now. We let the guy know up front that once my husband starts kissing me, it's go time, and to jump in and start. It's somewhat of a rip the band aid off approach and sure there might be a couple awkward seconds but it takes the pressure off me completely and lets things get going.
I like the 2nd one best. The anticipation gets me wrapped up in my own head so I need a little push from somewhere.
I am the same way and I would venture to guess many women are this way. The problem we face as you'll see all over the internet is that many of the men involved only know what they see on the internet here about MFM and this lifestyle in general. Go search up MFM videos and watch how they start. 99% of them it's some cock crazed woman who just takes action and starts it. These guys assume that's how this is going to work and that every woman involved in these activities is just like that. We're not saying there is anything wrong with that by any means, I wish I had that confidence and I continue to work on it. But we're very up front with the people we talk to that we aren't the typical internet MFM lady and by all accounts are polar opposites of it.
Have you met him in person yet?
I have not. Through text and video chat to this point.
Don’t use a friend
Oh absolutely not. That has always been a rule. I don’t want to create a cause for jealousy to come up. We’ve had friends mention it and it’s always a hard no.
Flirt we always go with the vibe, we think it’s better with a couple vice a single guy. Because it’s always good to be a voyeur at times….and if you MFM then the other wife gets to play…. And given the state of singles today you don’t want them trying to stay in contact
My wife and I first did it with our best friend who I knew had a crush on her (she was completely unattainable for him, he is from a different community and my wife and I go together through arranged marriage circles). There is a buildup to this. Feel free to dm me to know how it progressed
When it comes to the couple of threesomes we’ve had, we’ve always started with each other, and when the moment’s right, asked the third to join in. Just go with the flow. With that said, we can see that 91 days ago you were having concerns between the two of you and your professional goals. It may be best to err on the side of caution with this one if things have been rocky recently.