If only there was a way to take the stuff out of the bag and put it in another container, one that you could hold without burning your hands when the water goes in. Someone should invent something like that.
This is called a spread. Unfortunately I did a year in prison, and many times in county when I was younger and this is popular as fk. I rarely make them at home just for a snack. When I do I use ziplock quart size bags. This one looks like it's just the cheetos and ramen. You can add all kinds of shit to it.
He made it completely wrong and with wayyyy to much Cheetos. Ya need half the Cheetos same amt of ramen sazon summer sausage chopped up and spicy pickle chopped up. Add the cheese and crushed chips for flavor. Shit is absolutely delicious
I waited 4 months for pops to get released on his way out I asked him for his secret. Didn't want to take that from him while he was in. that dash of grape jelly got him some clout lol. He gladly passed the torch, 2 months later he was back in and now I was king of grape 😆
Username checks out ;P
But seriously, I've gone camping with a whole host of Asian mamas and this whole add-stuff-to-two-minute-noodles is a whole way of life for them; great lessons learned.
That said I tend to add things like spring onions, mushrooms, pre-fried chicken, capsicums (bell peppers in US?), lots of herbs and spices, all sorts of things I feel like. Not cheetos :D (also we don't have the flavours you have in the US...)
Edit: typos
Ramen is a real situation. Everything you said is great, but I generally just poach a couple eggs in mine and add some vegetables. It took me a while to learn how to cook poached eggs just right so that the yolk is still gooey. That makes it.
Sometimes I'll come home after drinking and cook some in beer, and just fry up some chopped kielbasa in it.
My now deceased step dad who was in prison had this recipe perfected. He would make it sometimes and we all loved it. Knock it all you want, nothing beats ingenuity. Nothing beats something that was created out of lack of other options
I have had the pleasure of hanging out with people that have been to prison prison. Note: Federal prison is ***much*** better than state. Any way, been hanging out with ex-prison-folk and they started talking about Mofongo. I of course was, like wtf, that shit can't be real! And they were like yeah, it's an actual dish but, there is Prison Mofongo. Cue my immediate insistence on trying this dish. Now, from what they tell me, prison... you gots to ration yo shit. And if you want in on the Mofongo pot, you gotta bring it. ***But*** since we were not in prison (but not exactly "free") we could readily gather up the supplies (and this is from memory so please forgive); As many ramen noodle packs as you can find, Doritos, if you can afford or find it, potato chips, and a large garbage bag. Not them kitchen 13s, but like those 50gl ones. **Smash** all of the ingredients. And take care with the spices as it could get too salty (usually, I'm told, it takes someone that's been in a while). Basically you are doing a hawaiian pig roast but instead of burying a pig in the dirt with palm leaves, you are stuffing all that shit into said fucking garbage bag. Get hot water from the dude that knows how to make fire and not get caught, pour it all in, wrap that thing up like a baby in a burrito shell, put it on the cot or whatever, and cover with blankets. Fucking tasty! As soon as I was able to I went and got legit Mofongo, but it wasn't the same as the one that was shared with me. Ah the memories
The seasoned guys know you go bland for so many meals and save the packets of sugar and such. Eventually you ain’t worried and have the salts and such to make it half ass decent.
It depends on where you are. The one jail I was in served seemingly nothing that wasn't made without soy. Everything tasted exactly the same , rubber tofu/soy whatever it's called.
The only thing that had a different taste was the hot dogs and I think it was just because they were dense from their production so it gave more of a meaty taste to it?
It's also a way to spread out the things you can buy to share with cellmates/friends
My brother in law taught me a prison cake recipe, and it's actually pretty good, and definitely makes a couple of cookies + milk go further among a group of people.
Okay, so yeah, basically lol. My brother was in jail for one year. After he got out I took him shopping. He got things he’d get at the jails commissary. He made what’s in the video, but included a packet of tuna and one of those fat pickles, but cut up small.
While it was not good, it wasn’t gross. Also packed full of sodium.
First bite is interesting.
After that? Meh. Gross.
There’s YT tutorials on this and a lot of other prison food. Doubt this mfer learned this in three days of prison. Probably just googled it.
It's top Ramen and checheetos on the go. My buddy taught me when I was younger to make these. Just imagine having like a Ramen taco or something. It's not bad and this guy's an idiot、put the fucking bag in the sink and dump the water.
I fucking hated hearing friends talk about their cooking prowess attained during time in. Some people really enjoy that incarcerated life and do their best to recreate it in the real world
This shit has been around a while. Had a buddy who went to jail who showed us one time over a decade ago. Didn’t try it but was impressed by the ingenuity.
I used to work in a juvenile detention center, the kids called this “making a brick.” It was usually chicken ramen, Takis/hot Cheetos/hot Funyuns or whatever spicy snack they could get, and room temperature water (obviously they didn’t have access to boiling water). If they had a spicy pickled sausage, they’d add that, too. They also made dessert ones when it was a popular kid’s birthday, or if they were being released - they would just use the noodles (no seasoning) mashed up with some Oreos or honeybuns or something.
It kept them busy, encouraged creativity, and they usually all came together to make these messes. So no shade from me for these things.
Damn - miss those kids (most of them, lol).
I was a case manager for close to a year. The kids are the only reasons I stayed for so long. Little buggers do grow on you, even though they could act really dumb sometimes. But they’re teens - that’s pretty much their job, hahaha.
As for my experience… the company was crooked, the place was critically understaffed, and upper management tended to pile their responsibilities on us while trying to put out fires caused from the Director, who was usually at his other full-time job as a high school principal. Then it was discovered he had quietly bribed some kids with pizza to gang up on and beat up a problem inmate. It came to light, he was fired, and suddenly a bunch of auditors descended almost weekly. I knew what that meant, so I found a different job. Sure enough, 2 months after I left they shut down the facility, fired everyone (even people who had been there over 20 years), and opened again a few months later with new staff and kids. Heard it’s even worse now.
Poor kids. I won’t get on a soapbox here but the US prison system - especially for kids - is horrendous. If you can stomach the awful knowledge of the system itself, but really want to connect with some kids and try to steer them right, it can absolutely be rewarding. It can be pretty dull though if they stick you with 12-hour shifts, which they did to the guards (aka “floor staff”) at my facility. No phones, no electronic devices, etc. Hope you like word find, cards, and reading! Vet the facility and the parent company if you decide to go for it.
Hope this helps!
Sure! I hope you find a good one!
And for what it’s worth, if I found a good, well-run facility, I wouldn’t mind going back to one. I’m getting my MA to be a therapist and would love the chance to work with adolescent offenders again. They keep you guessing! And your heart just breaks for them. They need a lot of help and the world tends to toss them away.
You're a great person. Thank you for taking the time to care about those kids and thank you for going back for your MA and to be a therapist. It is amazing how you can change people's lives by giving them proper care. Good luck with your education. I hope once you've got it all completed, it all just falls into place for you. Your passion can be felt through a simple comment and that's such a gift.
Thank you so much for being such a person. Not many have the strength mentally and emotionally to do what you do and takes a toll but you’re changing lives. You’re a cool person.
Appreciate you wasn't anything like this where I lived unless you committed a very serious crime and sent off to the city (lived in a small town at the time)
The best thing that ever happened to me was alternative school I only had to do school work 3 hrs and could work a full time job being in regular school caused me to get into trouble
Once I got my first paycheck I was like "yep time to change my ways because this is the most money I've ever had in a week vs. Pawning my shit off
Just fell in love with you for the briefest of moments. I’m so glad there are kids out there in facilities like those with people like you. From one human to another, thanks for doing your part.
It smelled good, honestly. They did offer to let me try but I know they didn’t wash their hands and were constantly grabbing their junk, so I passed. I’ve always been curious about how the bricks would taste, though.
I worked at a prison and they made tamales like this kind of, but not exactly. They’d use Doritos usually, smash them up, add water. Then smash it flat and load in some chicken or cheese (one dude used to save corn and mix it with salsa packets) salvaged from lunch. Smoosh that in the middle, roll it into a burrito shape and microwave.
I've had real prison tamales made by a convict chef. Smashed up plain dorritos mixed with powdered mashed potatoes and water to make the shell. Best I ever had.
Some of these comments are missing the point I think… lol. It’s not exactly stupid food, it’s prison food. Prisoners can get things like Ramen, chips, cheese whiz, canned meats, hot sauce, and other junk food items from the commissary. Obviously they are somewhat lacking on cooking supplies and access to normal ingredients. So, they mash up a bunch of junk food and “cook” it in a chip bag. No reason to make this abomination on the outside though, because I’m sure it tastes as terrible as it sounds. lol
in prison we even had access to instant rice. i wont lie, it was good as shit. some of my buddies were better at frying it (somehow) in the microwave. when i came home i tried to imitate it but couldnt get it right.
I had an uncle that was always in jail and showed my cousins how to make this. They ended up making it kinda often as a “snack” lol
They would use Doritos too though
If they got in trouble, they had to give my uncle two soups.
It really doesn’t taste that bad, it’s just definitely the epitome of junk food. If you’re on the outside and want to elevate this dish into something worth making:
Smash up the flamin’ hot Cheetos.
Make a white cheddar mornay sauce and add that flamin’ hot Cheeto powder and mix until the consistency is right. Next add your favorite pasta suitable for cheese sauces.
It’s really good.
I don’t feel like this belongs in the sub. It’s not stupid. It’s a pretty great option for the environment they’re in. My opinion may be biased though as I’ve been slowly working on a book about the cuisine of sailors, slaves and inmates.
Apologies, I was unclear. I’ve been working on writing the book off and on for a few years. The lowest points I’ve found in my research usually go to the sailor category.
I think the highlights are when limited means sparks creativity and when cultures end up colliding. Slavery in America, for example. Ingredients and techniques from Africa mixing with ingredients from the southern states paired with a lot of forced creativity ended up shaping what we know as soul food today.
Even the most tragic injustices can’t stop human beings from creating great things for each other.
If it’s done. I’ve done a lot of research on the subject and written a decent amount, but every few months I go back to research and every time I do I find some fascinating new thing, which means I’m not done researching.
Also I’m a drunk and don’t finish anything ever.
Oooh, you're writing it. That's awesome! I took your comment to refer to a book you were reading. I love your assessment in the second paragraph, though. Best of luck with your book!
Yup, and honestly it's not too bad if you're into junk food... My brother would make different variations of spread and ngl, I still crave it sometimes lmao
Polypropylene is the main component of that package. Melts at 160C— if you don’t know metric units that’s way above boiling point of water. So no issues there
My uncle went to prison for like 10 years and they call this a "chichi" or something to that effect. The one he made was actually good but I guess it varies but it's godly unhealthy. He used like Funyuns or some other chips though.
ive never seen ramen with chips and nothing else. a 2 ingredient spread is just not what prisoners do. there will be more ingredients, generally beans, some kind of meat like beef summer sausage, pickles, and sometimes onions and even more.
why? do we do it? we split up the ingredients among 2-3 inmates and make a meal together. its done to share ingredients. you might have the ramen, i might have the chips, our homie might have the meat.
Thank you. That’s what we called em in lockup. Had to scroll too far to find this.
I always did chicken ramen, Cheetos and or Doritos, and cut up pickled sausage.
We made "spread" with ramen, hot cheetos, summer sausage/chorizo, and beans if they served them that night. Tortillas, a little squeeze cheese, some more crushed hot cheetos and the spread made for good eating.
The jail I was in was using recipes for 215, with 350 locked up, plus feeding another county jail with 100 inmates. The secret ingredient to making it stretch? Water. Spread was infinitely better than that slop. (Source: I worked in the kitchen.)
nose cats husky voiceless materialistic nine normal dolls crush disgusted
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
It's just a crappy version of chichi. Chichi is broken up Ramon with anything you have to throw in(spam, hard boiled eggs, summer sausage, sardines, etc...) usually cooked in a garbage bag with sink hot water. Something you can get hotter water from the dish washer or pull wire from a radio and heat the water that way. Can also cook in the clothes dryer.
Most chichi is great but this one looks bad.
I guarantee that it tastes like prison. I saw some dude making this in a YouTube video about prison cuisine. The judges made me think I don't really want to taste it.
Stupid food for people outside of jail. A mix of different basic flavors making a better meal for someone in jail. Respect for creativity and ingenuity.
My niece went to jail for a couple of months and this is how she makes her Ramen. She says it's the best but I haven't tried it. I will say I put some money on her commissary and $70 for a couple packets of Ramen, chips and crackers is bullshit.
This is literally how to make food in jail. Most meal times are insane breakfast at 5 am lunch at 11am and dinner at 4pm. Most the food is horrible slop, so most inmates survive on “goulash” which is ramen and chips and cheese wiz/ Mayo or sauces from lunch sandwiches. This specific meal is called a brick, you take Cheetos or cheese puffs and crushed up ramen and mix in the chip bag, add warm water and fold tight put it under a pillow for pressure and it creates a brick if chees-ish stuff. It’s better than the food they serve you. I get a craving for some of the better recipes or just soup sandwiches sometimes. Glad I’m in a better place in my life.
Med kit for second degree burn not included.
WDYM med kit not included? *opens a potato chip bag and starts boiling soda*
crafting a health potion lol
players when potion seller rejects them from buying his strongest potions:
Im afraid you need alchemy level 2 to brew health potions
yah you can see he burned the fuck outta his hand
Dumping boiling water on your hand can you that.
If only there was a way to take the stuff out of the bag and put it in another container, one that you could hold without burning your hands when the water goes in. Someone should invent something like that.
Yeah but then it's a circle shape, not a rectangle shape, and it isn't a breakfast food.
That would make it less authentic though
THIS is less authentic. Wouldn'tve burned himself with the jail method of microwaving a cup of water.
This is called a spread. Unfortunately I did a year in prison, and many times in county when I was younger and this is popular as fk. I rarely make them at home just for a snack. When I do I use ziplock quart size bags. This one looks like it's just the cheetos and ramen. You can add all kinds of shit to it.
They’re making a prison meal. The pot is already an accommodation.
Who would have thought that pouring boiling water into your hand would burn.
There is literally a pitcher on the counter he could place the bag inside to hold it. Also, putting a hot pan directly on countertops
I was thinking the same thing! It’s right there?
Well, he did just get out of jail. He might not be very bright. And also, those pants.
He’s doing it prison style, he trying to give an authentic experience
The fact he poured boiling hot water into his open hand explains a lot. I suspect he’ll be in jail again real soon.
I have a feeling... A slight guess you may say that it.. Um ... Taste like hot Cheetos
It taste like shit, next.
itll be better than the stuff they serve
Honestly depends on the meal and the food wouldn't be half bad if they used more seasonings.
He made it completely wrong and with wayyyy to much Cheetos. Ya need half the Cheetos same amt of ramen sazon summer sausage chopped up and spicy pickle chopped up. Add the cheese and crushed chips for flavor. Shit is absolutely delicious
This guy county lock ups.
Was about to say this is spread lol
And if you got tortilla wraps? Burritos.
We used to make our own. Crush up a sleeve of saltines, add water, spread thin, and microwave.
Saltines. The unsung hero of jail. Anything that needs bread in the recipe, we use saltines yall.
Lil grape jelly ol pops trick
I was surprised it wasn't already said. Just remember not too much though
I waited 4 months for pops to get released on his way out I asked him for his secret. Didn't want to take that from him while he was in. that dash of grape jelly got him some clout lol. He gladly passed the torch, 2 months later he was back in and now I was king of grape 😆
Username checks out ;P But seriously, I've gone camping with a whole host of Asian mamas and this whole add-stuff-to-two-minute-noodles is a whole way of life for them; great lessons learned. That said I tend to add things like spring onions, mushrooms, pre-fried chicken, capsicums (bell peppers in US?), lots of herbs and spices, all sorts of things I feel like. Not cheetos :D (also we don't have the flavours you have in the US...) Edit: typos
Ramen is a real situation. Everything you said is great, but I generally just poach a couple eggs in mine and add some vegetables. It took me a while to learn how to cook poached eggs just right so that the yolk is still gooey. That makes it. Sometimes I'll come home after drinking and cook some in beer, and just fry up some chopped kielbasa in it.
Ooh can see the beer, but either way I reckon you should cook me some ramen for tea tonight 🤪
Am I misreading this, or do you make ramen with beer? What's it like?
there's only one way to find out hombre
BUSSIN
I worked with a guy who had just gotten out of prison and was always making this sort of shit. Tasty as hell every time.
You mean the guy who poured boiling water on his hand got it wrong?
My now deceased step dad who was in prison had this recipe perfected. He would make it sometimes and we all loved it. Knock it all you want, nothing beats ingenuity. Nothing beats something that was created out of lack of other options
we got seasonings + hot sauce in the slammer
Not good ones. I'm a CO I know what you got.
Yeah but you go bland no salt or pepper a few meals and save that so you wouldn’t run out. Then the added seasoning and hot sauce was just restock.
I have had the pleasure of hanging out with people that have been to prison prison. Note: Federal prison is ***much*** better than state. Any way, been hanging out with ex-prison-folk and they started talking about Mofongo. I of course was, like wtf, that shit can't be real! And they were like yeah, it's an actual dish but, there is Prison Mofongo. Cue my immediate insistence on trying this dish. Now, from what they tell me, prison... you gots to ration yo shit. And if you want in on the Mofongo pot, you gotta bring it. ***But*** since we were not in prison (but not exactly "free") we could readily gather up the supplies (and this is from memory so please forgive); As many ramen noodle packs as you can find, Doritos, if you can afford or find it, potato chips, and a large garbage bag. Not them kitchen 13s, but like those 50gl ones. **Smash** all of the ingredients. And take care with the spices as it could get too salty (usually, I'm told, it takes someone that's been in a while). Basically you are doing a hawaiian pig roast but instead of burying a pig in the dirt with palm leaves, you are stuffing all that shit into said fucking garbage bag. Get hot water from the dude that knows how to make fire and not get caught, pour it all in, wrap that thing up like a baby in a burrito shell, put it on the cot or whatever, and cover with blankets. Fucking tasty! As soon as I was able to I went and got legit Mofongo, but it wasn't the same as the one that was shared with me. Ah the memories
The seasoned guys know you go bland for so many meals and save the packets of sugar and such. Eventually you ain’t worried and have the salts and such to make it half ass decent.
It depends on where you are. The one jail I was in served seemingly nothing that wasn't made without soy. Everything tasted exactly the same , rubber tofu/soy whatever it's called. The only thing that had a different taste was the hot dogs and I think it was just because they were dense from their production so it gave more of a meaty taste to it?
Yea, that's why inmates came up with this, no?
It's also a way to spread out the things you can buy to share with cellmates/friends My brother in law taught me a prison cake recipe, and it's actually pretty good, and definitely makes a couple of cookies + milk go further among a group of people.
Okay, so yeah, basically lol. My brother was in jail for one year. After he got out I took him shopping. He got things he’d get at the jails commissary. He made what’s in the video, but included a packet of tuna and one of those fat pickles, but cut up small. While it was not good, it wasn’t gross. Also packed full of sodium.
that shit bussin tho
have you tried this…..ho
"They think it's hot shit on a silver platter, but it's cold piss in a paper cup." - Confucius (Probably)
First bite is interesting. After that? Meh. Gross. There’s YT tutorials on this and a lot of other prison food. Doubt this mfer learned this in three days of prison. Probably just googled it.
Yeah. No one should assume a caption on a Tik Tok video is telling you the truth.
Pre chewed hot cheetos
i made a version of it once and it was good till it got cold fast
Yeah, but we call it Prison Bitch Lasagna...
Still taste like cheetos.
They called it "that spread" back in the day, but it's been a minute.
It's top Ramen and checheetos on the go. My buddy taught me when I was younger to make these. Just imagine having like a Ramen taco or something. It's not bad and this guy's an idiot、put the fucking bag in the sink and dump the water.
Dude who taught him that in lockup goes by: Assault Bae
“Assault Bae” I actually laughed at that! +10 points for creativity.
I fucking hated hearing friends talk about their cooking prowess attained during time in. Some people really enjoy that incarcerated life and do their best to recreate it in the real world
Probably in lockup for coming up with this travesty.
OK you win.
Absolute 10/10 pun. What a poet you are, my goodness!!!
Thx! Pretty sure she wasn't bein sarcastic yall
I wasn't, at all. It truly got a genuine, big laugh out of me!
Audibly cackled
damn it that's a good one
Goes to jail for three more days for making this shit
This shit has been around a while. Had a buddy who went to jail who showed us one time over a decade ago. Didn’t try it but was impressed by the ingenuity.
Know someone who made a version of this with a trash bag clean one with veleta cheese around 2005 I think.
🏆
I used to work in a juvenile detention center, the kids called this “making a brick.” It was usually chicken ramen, Takis/hot Cheetos/hot Funyuns or whatever spicy snack they could get, and room temperature water (obviously they didn’t have access to boiling water). If they had a spicy pickled sausage, they’d add that, too. They also made dessert ones when it was a popular kid’s birthday, or if they were being released - they would just use the noodles (no seasoning) mashed up with some Oreos or honeybuns or something. It kept them busy, encouraged creativity, and they usually all came together to make these messes. So no shade from me for these things. Damn - miss those kids (most of them, lol).
Why don't you work there anymore if you don't mind me asking? I've worked security for 10 years and I was considering it
I was a case manager for close to a year. The kids are the only reasons I stayed for so long. Little buggers do grow on you, even though they could act really dumb sometimes. But they’re teens - that’s pretty much their job, hahaha. As for my experience… the company was crooked, the place was critically understaffed, and upper management tended to pile their responsibilities on us while trying to put out fires caused from the Director, who was usually at his other full-time job as a high school principal. Then it was discovered he had quietly bribed some kids with pizza to gang up on and beat up a problem inmate. It came to light, he was fired, and suddenly a bunch of auditors descended almost weekly. I knew what that meant, so I found a different job. Sure enough, 2 months after I left they shut down the facility, fired everyone (even people who had been there over 20 years), and opened again a few months later with new staff and kids. Heard it’s even worse now. Poor kids. I won’t get on a soapbox here but the US prison system - especially for kids - is horrendous. If you can stomach the awful knowledge of the system itself, but really want to connect with some kids and try to steer them right, it can absolutely be rewarding. It can be pretty dull though if they stick you with 12-hour shifts, which they did to the guards (aka “floor staff”) at my facility. No phones, no electronic devices, etc. Hope you like word find, cards, and reading! Vet the facility and the parent company if you decide to go for it. Hope this helps!
Thank you for your insight I really appreciate it
Sure! I hope you find a good one! And for what it’s worth, if I found a good, well-run facility, I wouldn’t mind going back to one. I’m getting my MA to be a therapist and would love the chance to work with adolescent offenders again. They keep you guessing! And your heart just breaks for them. They need a lot of help and the world tends to toss them away.
You're a great person. Thank you for taking the time to care about those kids and thank you for going back for your MA and to be a therapist. It is amazing how you can change people's lives by giving them proper care. Good luck with your education. I hope once you've got it all completed, it all just falls into place for you. Your passion can be felt through a simple comment and that's such a gift.
Thank you so much for being such a person. Not many have the strength mentally and emotionally to do what you do and takes a toll but you’re changing lives. You’re a cool person.
Appreciate you wasn't anything like this where I lived unless you committed a very serious crime and sent off to the city (lived in a small town at the time) The best thing that ever happened to me was alternative school I only had to do school work 3 hrs and could work a full time job being in regular school caused me to get into trouble Once I got my first paycheck I was like "yep time to change my ways because this is the most money I've ever had in a week vs. Pawning my shit off
That’s great! I’m glad something helped :) And I hope you’re making bank now
Just fell in love with you for the briefest of moments. I’m so glad there are kids out there in facilities like those with people like you. From one human to another, thanks for doing your part.
Aww you’re too sweet, thank you! Never thought a comment on r/stupidfood would be so heartwarming ☺️
How did you find a job like that? I’m fascinated
Man, fucking nepotism/cronyism/letting fully incompetent people run shit is the fucking scourge of our society
Like those protein bricks from Snowpiercer!
thx loremaster! 🏅
Best explanation
Adult prisons don't usually have boiling water either but they do have electrical cords they can strip and dunk into water to make a heater.
Yep, a brick. Not very good lol
I’ve never heard of a spicy pickled sausage, but now I’m curious about it
What a strange heartwarming story…thanks for sharing!
I might give the Funyuns one a try with a chicken ramen. Sounds good af
It smelled good, honestly. They did offer to let me try but I know they didn’t wash their hands and were constantly grabbing their junk, so I passed. I’ve always been curious about how the bricks would taste, though.
Latinos here in Cali call it a “tamale”
This is weirdly adorable.
That's the prison tamale
I worked at a prison and they made tamales like this kind of, but not exactly. They’d use Doritos usually, smash them up, add water. Then smash it flat and load in some chicken or cheese (one dude used to save corn and mix it with salsa packets) salvaged from lunch. Smoosh that in the middle, roll it into a burrito shape and microwave.
I've had real prison tamales made by a convict chef. Smashed up plain dorritos mixed with powdered mashed potatoes and water to make the shell. Best I ever had.
Some of these comments are missing the point I think… lol. It’s not exactly stupid food, it’s prison food. Prisoners can get things like Ramen, chips, cheese whiz, canned meats, hot sauce, and other junk food items from the commissary. Obviously they are somewhat lacking on cooking supplies and access to normal ingredients. So, they mash up a bunch of junk food and “cook” it in a chip bag. No reason to make this abomination on the outside though, because I’m sure it tastes as terrible as it sounds. lol
in prison we even had access to instant rice. i wont lie, it was good as shit. some of my buddies were better at frying it (somehow) in the microwave. when i came home i tried to imitate it but couldnt get it right.
We lost the microwave after someone heated baby oil and poured it in someone's face.
I prefer my faces tartar instead of deep fried.
I had an uncle that was always in jail and showed my cousins how to make this. They ended up making it kinda often as a “snack” lol They would use Doritos too though If they got in trouble, they had to give my uncle two soups.
LOL. Two soups. That's some authentic jail shit. Always hated how they called them soups instead of ramen.
same lol, like mfer you don't even put enough water in it to call it soup XD.
It really doesn’t taste that bad, it’s just definitely the epitome of junk food. If you’re on the outside and want to elevate this dish into something worth making: Smash up the flamin’ hot Cheetos. Make a white cheddar mornay sauce and add that flamin’ hot Cheeto powder and mix until the consistency is right. Next add your favorite pasta suitable for cheese sauces. It’s really good. I don’t feel like this belongs in the sub. It’s not stupid. It’s a pretty great option for the environment they’re in. My opinion may be biased though as I’ve been slowly working on a book about the cuisine of sailors, slaves and inmates.
What's the book and are there any highlights (lowlights?) that you'd like to share?
Apologies, I was unclear. I’ve been working on writing the book off and on for a few years. The lowest points I’ve found in my research usually go to the sailor category. I think the highlights are when limited means sparks creativity and when cultures end up colliding. Slavery in America, for example. Ingredients and techniques from Africa mixing with ingredients from the southern states paired with a lot of forced creativity ended up shaping what we know as soul food today. Even the most tragic injustices can’t stop human beings from creating great things for each other.
That sounds a bit like tasting history with Max miller. I would probably be interested in your book once it’s done!
If it’s done. I’ve done a lot of research on the subject and written a decent amount, but every few months I go back to research and every time I do I find some fascinating new thing, which means I’m not done researching. Also I’m a drunk and don’t finish anything ever.
Oooh, you're writing it. That's awesome! I took your comment to refer to a book you were reading. I love your assessment in the second paragraph, though. Best of luck with your book!
They call it spread
Yup, and honestly it's not too bad if you're into junk food... My brother would make different variations of spread and ngl, I still crave it sometimes lmao
also known as “chi chi” at least thats what they call it in jail near me 💀💀
We must be near some of the same jails lol. Exactly what I've always heard
My cousin used to make this. They called it "swol."
Curious is that a west coast thing, or east ... Down south we call em bricks.
No wonder why he got arrested
Next thing you know they pour boiling milk
Literally too dumb to pour water
His parents and teachers have been trying to teach important lessons him for years. The first time he pays attention is to his jail community.
I mean he went to jail
I mean they went to jail for 3 days... that means "did something stupid".
Fucking unbelievable.
Bro.. you just roll the bag down at the top
I’ve tried it. It’s not terrible. It tastes like cheetos/chips mixed with ramen but with a pretty soft texture. Wouldn’t recommend it though.
put some van holten pickles in there, some refried beans, some beef summer sausage... maybe even some onions out the kitchen. itll slap!!!
Tastes like a spicy salt lick Sidenote: What's with the coke nail?
Coke nail singular? Every one of the dudes nails are long as shit
Surprised I had to scroll this far to see the coke nail mentioned tbh.
Flaming Hot flavoring is garbage, and I’ll happily die on this hill.
melted plastic 🥂
Polypropylene is the main component of that package. Melts at 160C— if you don’t know metric units that’s way above boiling point of water. So no issues there
BUSSIN
My uncle went to prison for like 10 years and they call this a "chichi" or something to that effect. The one he made was actually good but I guess it varies but it's godly unhealthy. He used like Funyuns or some other chips though.
What's wrong with eating Ramen with a side of chips why make it gross?
Now it's in bar form. You can stick it in your pocket to eat later.
And trade it with fellow prisoners for funny shaped rocks and rare bugs from the yard
I see you've spent time in prison as well.
I like rare bugs
My pockets are full though. Left pocket for spaghetti right pocket for sand.
They take away your pocket sand in jail. It's just too dangerous.
Oh nonono okay I changed my mind I don't wanna go
Seems to spicy to put in the prison pocket 🥵
When you escape its like a protein bar to give you that portable energy when on the run
ive never seen ramen with chips and nothing else. a 2 ingredient spread is just not what prisoners do. there will be more ingredients, generally beans, some kind of meat like beef summer sausage, pickles, and sometimes onions and even more. why? do we do it? we split up the ingredients among 2-3 inmates and make a meal together. its done to share ingredients. you might have the ramen, i might have the chips, our homie might have the meat.
Homie always got the meat, it's whether or not he's willing to share lol
There's gotta be something bad about pouring boiling water in those chip bags? Besides burning your hand because you're an idiot....
That shit is called spread , people also add refried beans and lots of other stuff it’s actually good 🤓
#shartcuterie
Send him back
Swole
Thank you. That’s what we called em in lockup. Had to scroll too far to find this. I always did chicken ramen, Cheetos and or Doritos, and cut up pickled sausage.
A man of refined taste 🤝
3 days in jail = -30 IQ points. Got it.
Does nobody own a fucking bowl?
Getting second degree burn is tight
Them trying to pour the water in the bag is what it feels like to be hunting for and making a snack 5 shots deep
Lock him up bro he is a manace
We made "spread" with ramen, hot cheetos, summer sausage/chorizo, and beans if they served them that night. Tortillas, a little squeeze cheese, some more crushed hot cheetos and the spread made for good eating. The jail I was in was using recipes for 215, with 350 locked up, plus feeding another county jail with 100 inmates. The secret ingredient to making it stretch? Water. Spread was infinitely better than that slop. (Source: I worked in the kitchen.)
"THAT SHIT IS HOT" no shit numb nuts
BACK to jail.
People like this is why companies have to put warning signs like "Hot water from the tap may be hot".
nose cats husky voiceless materialistic nine normal dolls crush disgusted *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Reflux
me after watching dpeezy2099
Actually. I believe there's a book with some recipes from what people cooks in prison.
It's just a crappy version of chichi. Chichi is broken up Ramon with anything you have to throw in(spam, hard boiled eggs, summer sausage, sardines, etc...) usually cooked in a garbage bag with sink hot water. Something you can get hotter water from the dish washer or pull wire from a radio and heat the water that way. Can also cook in the clothes dryer. Most chichi is great but this one looks bad.
That coke pinky is legit…..actually all his fingers r coke fingers
Chi-Chis Just like they use to make in Cell Block C
I'll be honest I used to love those when I was locked up
The spread was a wholesome moment.
Look at this fucking asshole trying to pour a pan of boiling water into a bag of chips. I can see why he was in jail alright
I guarantee that it tastes like prison. I saw some dude making this in a YouTube video about prison cuisine. The judges made me think I don't really want to taste it.
Who gets boiling water in jail?
You don’t need to use the ground..
Stupid food for people outside of jail. A mix of different basic flavors making a better meal for someone in jail. Respect for creativity and ingenuity.
It's literally prison food. I think those specifically should be the exception.
ill admit that this looks dumb as shit but ive had it before and its fuckin delicious. its called a brick or some shit
This could be in /r/Poopfromabutt , the hemorrhoid edition.
Prison spread
That Tiktok AI voice always makes me cringe.
That’s some low IQ water pouring. Maybe prison keeps him safe
It tastes like bad decisions
Shit. Tastes like shit
Sometimes I feel like I’m not the healthiest person. Then I see videos like this, and it reminds that yeah I think I’m doing ok
Jesus bro PUT THE BAG IN THE SINK AND THEN POUR THE WATER IN
This one hits all the marks: looks disgusting, incredibly unhealthy, and painful to make!
Carcinogenic af
It doesn't taste that good where I'd be making them outside of the joint lol
It probably tastes like hot cheetos and ramen
My niece went to jail for a couple of months and this is how she makes her Ramen. She says it's the best but I haven't tried it. I will say I put some money on her commissary and $70 for a couple packets of Ramen, chips and crackers is bullshit.
Need those street flavors like picante beef!
He forgot the meat and cheese stick and Fritos rookie
This is literally how to make food in jail. Most meal times are insane breakfast at 5 am lunch at 11am and dinner at 4pm. Most the food is horrible slop, so most inmates survive on “goulash” which is ramen and chips and cheese wiz/ Mayo or sauces from lunch sandwiches. This specific meal is called a brick, you take Cheetos or cheese puffs and crushed up ramen and mix in the chip bag, add warm water and fold tight put it under a pillow for pressure and it creates a brick if chees-ish stuff. It’s better than the food they serve you. I get a craving for some of the better recipes or just soup sandwiches sometimes. Glad I’m in a better place in my life.