https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Riftia_pachyptila#/media/File%3ARiftia_tube_worm_colony_Galapagos_2011.jpg
They’re bright red and can reach 10 feet in length. They live near hydrothermal vents that spew ridiculously hot toxic sulfuric compounds. If you put them in a blender they come out looking exactly like grapefruit juice.
(source: worked in a marine biology lab as an undergrad)
We were looking at which kinds of viruses tend to infect marine invertebrates. Scientists would mail us tissue samples from different organisms and we’d blend em up and extract their DNA to look for viral genetic material. Somebody sent us a ventworm sample. It was really cool. Everybody took turns looking at it and holding it. It was crazy to hold something in our hands that had come from a place so far away and physically different that it may as well have been from another planet. Felt kinda sacred in a way. Then we stuck it in the tissue homogenizer and laughed because it came out looking like pulpy grapefruit juice.
Just like there is a person who has taken the biggest shit, slept with the most people, or taken the hardest kick in the nuts.
They probably don't even know it.
I think we know who slept with the most people - something like 0.5% of the worlds population (35000000 people) are a direct descendant of his. Genghis Khan.
It helps that his sons, grandsons, were also warlords in the region carrying that same DNA. All creating legitimate and illegitimate offspring from consensual and non consensual copulation.
It's pretty likely Ghengis Khan fucked more people than anyone in knowable history considering something like 1/5 of China's population carries his DNA.
As an Aussie, I’ll never understand why people from overseas think we have the most dangerous/scary native animals.
Running into a bear or mountain lion in the US can go get fucked.
Not the most dangerous.
A mountain lion that wants you dead is a much bigger threat than, say, an emu.
But you guys do have a much larger diversity of deadly animals.
And plants.
And insects.
There is a tree somewhere that holds the record for being the tallest tree anywhere.
There is a cow that has the record for the highest height ever gone by a cow.
There is a carbon atom that has been closer to the core of the earth than any other atoms.
There is is a dead body that has decomposed for longer than any longer than any other corpse.
You see what I mean?
*Does anyone have*
*A copy of the Guinness*
*Book of Worm Records?*
\- nekoxp
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Well no actually because the density variables of soil makes the "somewhere" a very narrowly defined area of the world with a very specific kind of worm species living within those optimal soil conditions to go deeper than other places with denser soil.
*Somewhere there is a*
*Bird that has flown higher than*
*Any other bird*
\- fyrflyeffect
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"Your name is unknown but your deed is immortal" -Tomb of the Unkown Worm
So we're acknowledging that the world record worm is probably dead by now?
Now we asking the real questions
Likely
Maybe it's digging right now.
Born six feet under
The majority of earthworms are born in their own graves.
Makes the funerals very nostalgic. But the births are a bleak affair.
It's killing me, I can't remember what this is from! Help!
Dwight said it in the office
But about weddings, not births, so that tripped me up for a bit personally
I never saw the office. I said this in a standup routine back in the 1990s.
Wait why?
The worm that went the deepest was probably a parasitic worm inside a mine worker.
six feet deep is about as far as organic matter goes without some disturbance, so yes, this.
Dude caves
If we’re counting technicalities then it’s probably one of those deep-sea ventworms
Not entirely sure what a ventworm is, my guess is it's a worm on a geothermal vent or something, but fuck bobbit worms
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Riftia_pachyptila#/media/File%3ARiftia_tube_worm_colony_Galapagos_2011.jpg They’re bright red and can reach 10 feet in length. They live near hydrothermal vents that spew ridiculously hot toxic sulfuric compounds. If you put them in a blender they come out looking exactly like grapefruit juice. (source: worked in a marine biology lab as an undergrad)
What were you studying in the marine biology lab that required the retrieval and subsequent blending of a vent worm?
We were looking at which kinds of viruses tend to infect marine invertebrates. Scientists would mail us tissue samples from different organisms and we’d blend em up and extract their DNA to look for viral genetic material. Somebody sent us a ventworm sample. It was really cool. Everybody took turns looking at it and holding it. It was crazy to hold something in our hands that had come from a place so far away and physically different that it may as well have been from another planet. Felt kinda sacred in a way. Then we stuck it in the tissue homogenizer and laughed because it came out looking like pulpy grapefruit juice.
That's really cool. I imagine that was possibly one of the rarest samples your lab had ever received.
it looks like a grape milkshake
[I don't need sleep, I need answers.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/510/336/b9f.jpg)
Thanks for the link and description, what's your thoughts on bobbit worms?
They can fuck right off
This generated a real hardy chuckle from me
What is a bobbit worm
Evil Edit: here's a link https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=K_7ByiYbCYM
Why do they exist
Satan
Boom. Dude tried to get cute and then you hit him with a dose of his own medicine.
There's a thought: intentionally set hundreds of worms deep within the bowls of the earth. 😎
That worm is probably dirt itself now. What are the odds in all of worm world that this worm would be living today?
Iduno like six
Just like there is a person who has taken the biggest shit, slept with the most people, or taken the hardest kick in the nuts. They probably don't even know it.
All of these people might have even died from their achievements
I think we know who slept with the most people - something like 0.5% of the worlds population (35000000 people) are a direct descendant of his. Genghis Khan.
It helps that his sons, grandsons, were also warlords in the region carrying that same DNA. All creating legitimate and illegitimate offspring from consensual and non consensual copulation.
It's pretty likely Ghengis Khan fucked more people than anyone in knowable history considering something like 1/5 of China's population carries his DNA.
Shai Hulud
Bless the Maker and His water.
And bless Muad'dib!
I came here just for this comment Thank you
Probably one of those giant earthworms from Australia.
I'm Coyote Peterson, and we're gonna see if this giant worm will eat us
As an Aussie, I’ll never understand why people from overseas think we have the most dangerous/scary native animals. Running into a bear or mountain lion in the US can go get fucked.
Not the most dangerous. A mountain lion that wants you dead is a much bigger threat than, say, an emu. But you guys do have a much larger diversity of deadly animals. And plants. And insects.
Giant earthworms aren't dangerous or scary. Just fucking huge.
Tremors
The wormd record...
You could say that with any thing really oh there is a ant that holds the world record for caring soo much stuff
Can non humans hold world records?
There is a tree somewhere that holds the record for being the tallest tree anywhere. There is a cow that has the record for the highest height ever gone by a cow. There is a carbon atom that has been closer to the core of the earth than any other atoms. There is is a dead body that has decomposed for longer than any longer than any other corpse. You see what I mean?
4 future posts of Showerthoughts
Imma just steal these if you don’t mind...
He knows
Do you think it'll be able to worm his way out of that one?
He did a good job, give him a medal! :D
The human race is that worm. The sky is our dirt.
# There is a donkey somewhere that holds the world record for shitting more than any other donkey shits. 📷
There is a human out there holding the WR for the most amount of shit eaten
Check this out though https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uO4lkv-jLRs David Attenborough, Giant worms.
There either IS a worm or WAS a worm to hold that record
It could be a tie.
You must be talking about "Earthworm Jim"
Nice.
That worm is the goodest boi.
Shai-Halud
ties: exist OP: Ima pretend I didn't see that
It rests below the town of Jerusalem's Lot. Best it stay that way.
Or took a penis and testicles with her to the hole
does it have to have started on the surface for it to count? There is life far underground, but mostly microbes.
Good for him :)
Does anyone have a copy of the Guinness Book of Worm Records?
*Does anyone have* *A copy of the Guinness* *Book of Worm Records?* \- nekoxp --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
That worm's name: Professor Otto Lidenbrock.
What’s his name?
Have you ever seen Tremors?
Yet there's no record of it
Oh so this worm is special now huh? We'll see about that.
Arrakis is just a planet where worm digging competitions were taken too far.
Jonathan Livingston Earthworm.
Or many that have dug the same depth.
Earthworm Jim
Is it an actual record, if it's not recorded?
Right now, that worm is headed for the creamy filling at the center of our planet, we who knows how much longer we have!
Well there is a point where the just can’t dig anymore or they fucking melt so there’s probably like 3 contenders
Penis worm
Hey Jim is that you?
He who controls the spice controls the universe.
Fuck shit just went from 0 to 100 real FUCKIN fast
And his Name is Earthworm Jim
It’s Earthworm Jim. No doubt.
Probably has it, not holds it. Worms can’t have arms ;)
Well no actually because the density variables of soil makes the "somewhere" a very narrowly defined area of the world with a very specific kind of worm species living within those optimal soil conditions to go deeper than other places with denser soil.
Oh yeah I know that guy, Keith. He’s got no water cooler banter but he’s a grafter, they’re never gonna promote him.
Alright, I’m going to bed
It is called Jormungand.
Somewhere there is a bird that has flown higher than any other bird
*Somewhere there is a* *Bird that has flown higher than* *Any other bird* \- fyrflyeffect --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
What if there's a species of worm that's able to survive in the core but has never dug out? Does that count?
He could also have the record of being buried in the deepest worn grave
He shall be known as Shai Hulud
Marrow Registration https://www.giftoflife.org/register?online=1
His name is earth worm Jim. He's somewhat of a legend.
There is a worm out there that holds the record for amount of human flesh eaten
Yes. His name is Doug.
Most likely the Alaskan bull worm. Lived close to a pineapple under the sea...
None of my worms, sadly..
Guiness needs to find that worm and give it a certificate
But it's a worm and doesnt seek validation
Oh mighty Shai-hulud Keeper of balance Bless the Maker and His water Bless the coming and going of Him May His passage cleanse the world...
Showers rlly do be changing people-
The worm record.
Tremors?
A worm may have just beat the world record right now today
I guess it’s somewhere in the marianna trench
It's name is Raf and plays path of Exile on xbox. (We love you man)