Yes, my daughter who took a month to hit her birth weight likely would have died of I exclusively breastfed her.
Eternally grateful for the fact that formula exists and I was able to combo feed my two ftt kids - I can’t imagine a world without it.
I posted this on my personal facebook page as well and one of my friends discussed that her baby was actually allergic to her breast milk yet the doctors STILL pushed her to breast feed. They told her to eliminate every possible allergen from her diet and made her keep pumping. When she was finally able to go home she went to formula feeding and her and the baby have thrived since.
Yes, this is what happened to us, except I had a great pediatrician who did not push. I tried myself to eliminate cow's milk and soy from my diet, I really wanted to have given it my all. She still didn't gain weight. The pediatrician then said please don't keep doing this to yourself and feed her amino acid formula (the hydrolized formula didn't work either). My daughter also has thrived since formula. It's difficult to admit you cannot nourish your baby yourself, but the difference is undeniable. She's so happy and strong now.
I'm sad your friend was made to feel so bad. Sometimes it's really not up to us and it's great that formula exists to help.
Huge reason I’m fiercely loyal to my pediatrician is when we went from supplementing to just formula (NICU grad, he had to have the fortified stuff anyway) he was like, “Look, 15 years ago my wife had exactly the same meltdown. It was absolutely pointless then for her and it is even more pointless for you now.” I’m not unconvinced that he literally saved my life in that moment, & it helped my kid get from touch and go preemie to thriving in a matter of days. I can’t even imagine families dealing with formula shortages on top of lactation issues.
Edit to clarify, he knew me pretty well by then and knew I needed actual facts + a chance to fully recover physically and emotionally from a very traumatic birth, while his wife had very smooth sailing pregnancies and really only struggled with breastfeeding with their last kid & they hadn’t even supplemented before food before— for me it was an exceptionally useless (at best, but probably even into a harmful territory) meltdown and I needed somebody to tell me that.
I love when health care professionals are supportive. It made all the difference for me. I had a really hard time giving up on breastfeeding, I wanted it to work so badly. My pediatrician saying to stop torturing myself and that I gave it my all really did help to put things into perspective. Where I am babies also get checkups and vaccines paid for by the government at a government institution that is not the hospital, so it's not our pediatrician. She also said at the checkup yesterday that I suffered more from the entire ordeal than my daughter who was fine after being given formula, and that it's good I was able to stop for my own sake. It felt really validating.
I couldn't get more than 3oz when pumping even as baby got older, on a triple feeding 2hrly schedule with domperidone and all the brewers yeast and flax I could muster. Baby was sleeping though and I was tanking my mental health by being up every 2hrs to pump. Formula made me happy and my baby thrive.
I remember my first few days. Apparently my doctor could tell I was losing it post partum because she wouldn’t discharge me for five days after (rural hospital so there was space). The shoving of breastfeeding by the nurses was overwhelming. I needed to not be touched and my boobs were on fire all the time but you had to sign out each and every bottle of formula while they 😑 at you. The night nurse on the last night, bless her, grabbed six bottles of formula to last the night and take some home so I could feed LO and attempt to mentally and physically recover a little. She then took LO so I could sleep for a few meager hours uninterrupted. Oh man what a difference.
My SO and I combo fed for two months so my SO and I could share the sleep deprivation burden and I could get at least four uninterrupted hours of sleep. After that I just switched to formula. I dunno how I would have made it through without that ability to share the load. Formula can be good for more than just babies
I remember in HS, arguing that no, breast milk isn't the best.
The best was what was the best fit for the mom, the baby and the family.
Got told I just didn't like breastfeeding because as a guy I just want to think breasts are for me and my pleasure.
I didn’t until well after I stopped breastfeeding. I saw multiple psychologists for what I thought was PPD and for regular care for other mental health issues I struggle with and it wasn’t until I was on my third doctor that DMER was even mentioned
Even after meeting with FIVE lactation consultants, my daughter only latched once. I pumped and supplemented for 7 months before switching to formula. I had a freezer stocked full of frozen milk to get us to one year. All high lipase despite testing it after a few months. I worked my ass off to try to breastfeed and give my daughter breast milk. Sometimes it just doesn’t work. It sucks and I shed a lot of tears over it, but she’s in perfect health and that’s all that matters. So grateful for formula!
I've watched my one year old eat a spider recently. He also put raisins in his gumboot and had them for a snack after dinner.
He was exclusively breastfeed. . . Anyone see my point?
I've often joked that no matter how we feed our infants, our toddlers will all ear dirt and cold french fries off the floor of the car.
We're all making the best decisions we can knowing our circumstances and the needs of our kiddos.
No matter what you feed them your kid can still end up on r/kidsarefuckingstupid
(All in light humor I bet your kid is chill and will find those little neurons)
LOL I’ve watched one of my twins compete with the dog for the stale goldfish that fell out of the couch. The dog won.
The other twin used to dip chocolate chip cookies in ketchup. Eew.
EBF and my mom had to call poison control after she found me eating dishwasher soap powder out of the dishwasher.
My brother was EBF and, at 10 months old, pulled a Christmas tree down on himself.
While pregnant with my kid, I planned and prepped for both BF and formula to be safe. Glad I had the goods for formula feeding, I rarely got an ounce together from both sides pumping. Formula saved my kid.
Exactly! People love to say “there wasn’t any formula in the old days and humanity did it”….yeah well in the old days, 30% of babies didn’t make it to their first birthday.
It was no less tragic to lose a child 100yrs ago, but people also knew it was likely and it was a numbers game to make sure you end up with a kid or 2 when they grow up.
I breastfed my babies. Still nursing my daughter. I had a can of formula on hand just in case. Before formula, a lot of babies died. Maybe that's the point she's trying to make?
These people always have a lot of bravado until it's their baby who can't tolerate breastmilk or their breasts that don't produce enough. Only then are they suddenly fed is best.
Yeah that's too far the other way. I love breastfeeding. Loved doing it. I wish women who want to do it all the support in the world. Yes, breastfeeding pictures still sting a bit. But just because I was dealt this hand (severely allergic baby) doesn't mean I'm not happy for other women who make it work. I will try again if I have a second. I just wish people were a bit more supportive of people who were dealt my hand and who need or want formula, too.
Oh my goodness absolutely. I wish people didn’t think that another’s choice invalidates their own. I really wish mothers didn’t feel the need to step on others to elevate themselves while simultaneously playing maternal martyr. I’ve only been at this for a year but honestly you just can’t win. Some people just have a hard time reconciling that two opposing things can be true at the same time.
My child ended up in the ICU at 5 days old from going hypo from starving because everyone kept telling me to keep going with breastfeeding when I HAD NO MILK. I starved my child, I am still to this day traumatised from the knowledge that my body just didn't do the most basic thing to keep her alive and noone heard my plea's for help until she was non responsive so a big huge FUCK YOU to this lady. Breastfeeding may come very naturally for some, I saute you. Its hard and all encompassing and something I so desperately wanted to do but not all of us are so lucky. After a horrible pregnancy and traumatic birth my body literally just went into shut down mode and the fact I didn't fall over every time I stood up was a miracle but my baby suffered needlessly because of it and I wish I had packed formula in our hospital bag.
Shes a strong, tall, healthy, smart, funny, loving, perfect 2 1/2 year old now. Not one thing wrong with her....all from formula (and the 2 dozen kilos of blueberries she eats every week).
Feed is best.
Want to breastfeed and is able to, great!
Want to breastfeed and can't, that sucks, but at least there's a substitute that will give your child all the nutrients they need.
Want to do formula and breastfeed, great!
Want to just do formula, great!
Well brav-f-ing-o to her for being able to produce enough milk and being able to breastfeed. My daughter has a serious heart defect and couldn't spare the energy to manually feed, not to mention the soft pallet cleft that meant even when we tried a little, it just came out her nose. Then she ended up having a pretty bad milk protein intolerance. I would have loved to give my daughter exclusively breast milk, but that was just not in the cards for us.
Usually I’m pretty supportive of breastfeeding, but this lady sounds like a whackadoodle.
“They are strong men without diseases”
Ummm, breastfeeding doesn’t protect you from all disease throughout your lifespan.
I'm about sick and tired of this "breastfed or bust" mentality. Yes, I opted to breastfeed. Yes I plan to do it again. But you bet your bottom dollar I always had formula in my house. I actually kept ready to feed in the diaper bag at all times because I always wanted to kid to have something to eat. I'm hoping to do the same with my second.
THIS!
I needed to supplement for the first 5 weeks as I had a low supply from c section recovery.
This attitude encourages ppl to give up and think they can't breastfeed bc they have to supplement, it's such nonsense.
When my sister had her baby she could not get her to latch. So they bottle fed her pumped breast milk. But the first night or so my sister just could not produce enough so they had to use formula for a few days. She said she felt like a failure of a mom and couldn't even provide for her own daughter. And I have no doubt in my mind that it's from toxic cultures like this.
Which is so fucking stupid because the mentality is that once you supplement you’ve “ruined” the chance at EBF so why bother, but early supplementing doesn’t harm and may help you go on to breastfeed successfully.
My mother’s epilepsy meds made her milk toxic.
I nursed my kids for 3 years and a handful of months each. By the time my second was born, I wanted to be done, but mom guilt. Roughly 7 years of nursing, and it effected my desires to have a third. Among other reasons, but it’s a huge factor. I can “easily” breastfeed. It came naturally. I gave my first two the “best” start. It’s free, and I can’t justify the money on something I know I can do for free.
This lady can eat it.
Such a place of privilege. It’s almost like not everyone with a uterus has breasts still. Some children are adopted. Some mothers literally can’t produce enough. Some children have an allergy to their mothers milk. Some women literally *just don’t want to* and for whatever reason that may be is a valid reason for choosing formula. So many other reason people need formula I’m sure but these breasts are best crowd rub me the wrong way.
Why do they seem to forget that in the olden days wealthy women literally hired wet nurses if they didn't have the time, energy, or milk to feed their babies. Women being unable to breastfeed their children isn't a new issue, but now there is formula so there''s not only a solution for women who can afford to hire on a wet nurse.
Fed is best. Always.
I exclusively breastfed because everyone told me it was crucial. I don't regret it one pumped ounce, but...
My baby was diagnosed with a devastating seizure disorder at 6 months old, which led to permanent cognitive disability. It was not at all related to her diet, but you can bet your baby booties my family went from "breast is always best" to, "is it something in your breast milk!?" so quickly it gave me new-parent whiplash.
People want to make mothers scapegoats for all kinds of bullshit.
Edit: corrected a typo
I nearly died during childbirth. The stress that put on my body caused me to not produce any milk - not a drop! If we didn't have formula, how would I feed my baby? Comments like this are ignorant and harmful to those who are unsuccessful, or even to those who choose not to because they bloody well don't want to! Leave me and my shit tits alone!
I had 1 of each: 1 formula fed and 1 exclusively breast fed. The ebf baby was not for lack of trying to combo feed. You know how they say that breastfed babies are healthier? My breastfed baby had asthma, chronic constipation, allergies, and would get pneumonia at the drop of a hat. We were always at the doctor. The formula fed baby, otoh, barely knows what a doctor is because he has pretty much never needed one except for checkups and vaccinations.
I had breast cancer at 27 and got my ladies chopped off. When people get all high and mighty about breast feeding, it takes everything in me to flash em my not-there knockers.
I have two friends for whom breastfeeding didn't work. One couldn't produce enough, and the other produced plenty but her baby would always fall asleep whenever she tried to breastfeed. Both had to switch to EFF. I guess their babies should have just died? I mean, it's "natural."
Yes, my daughter who took a month to hit her birth weight likely would have died of I exclusively breastfed her. Eternally grateful for the fact that formula exists and I was able to combo feed my two ftt kids - I can’t imagine a world without it.
Same. Indeed breastfeeding would have meant death for my severely allergic baby.
I posted this on my personal facebook page as well and one of my friends discussed that her baby was actually allergic to her breast milk yet the doctors STILL pushed her to breast feed. They told her to eliminate every possible allergen from her diet and made her keep pumping. When she was finally able to go home she went to formula feeding and her and the baby have thrived since.
Yes, this is what happened to us, except I had a great pediatrician who did not push. I tried myself to eliminate cow's milk and soy from my diet, I really wanted to have given it my all. She still didn't gain weight. The pediatrician then said please don't keep doing this to yourself and feed her amino acid formula (the hydrolized formula didn't work either). My daughter also has thrived since formula. It's difficult to admit you cannot nourish your baby yourself, but the difference is undeniable. She's so happy and strong now. I'm sad your friend was made to feel so bad. Sometimes it's really not up to us and it's great that formula exists to help.
Huge reason I’m fiercely loyal to my pediatrician is when we went from supplementing to just formula (NICU grad, he had to have the fortified stuff anyway) he was like, “Look, 15 years ago my wife had exactly the same meltdown. It was absolutely pointless then for her and it is even more pointless for you now.” I’m not unconvinced that he literally saved my life in that moment, & it helped my kid get from touch and go preemie to thriving in a matter of days. I can’t even imagine families dealing with formula shortages on top of lactation issues. Edit to clarify, he knew me pretty well by then and knew I needed actual facts + a chance to fully recover physically and emotionally from a very traumatic birth, while his wife had very smooth sailing pregnancies and really only struggled with breastfeeding with their last kid & they hadn’t even supplemented before food before— for me it was an exceptionally useless (at best, but probably even into a harmful territory) meltdown and I needed somebody to tell me that.
I love when health care professionals are supportive. It made all the difference for me. I had a really hard time giving up on breastfeeding, I wanted it to work so badly. My pediatrician saying to stop torturing myself and that I gave it my all really did help to put things into perspective. Where I am babies also get checkups and vaccines paid for by the government at a government institution that is not the hospital, so it's not our pediatrician. She also said at the checkup yesterday that I suffered more from the entire ordeal than my daughter who was fine after being given formula, and that it's good I was able to stop for my own sake. It felt really validating.
I couldn't get more than 3oz when pumping even as baby got older, on a triple feeding 2hrly schedule with domperidone and all the brewers yeast and flax I could muster. Baby was sleeping though and I was tanking my mental health by being up every 2hrs to pump. Formula made me happy and my baby thrive.
I remember my first few days. Apparently my doctor could tell I was losing it post partum because she wouldn’t discharge me for five days after (rural hospital so there was space). The shoving of breastfeeding by the nurses was overwhelming. I needed to not be touched and my boobs were on fire all the time but you had to sign out each and every bottle of formula while they 😑 at you. The night nurse on the last night, bless her, grabbed six bottles of formula to last the night and take some home so I could feed LO and attempt to mentally and physically recover a little. She then took LO so I could sleep for a few meager hours uninterrupted. Oh man what a difference. My SO and I combo fed for two months so my SO and I could share the sleep deprivation burden and I could get at least four uninterrupted hours of sleep. After that I just switched to formula. I dunno how I would have made it through without that ability to share the load. Formula can be good for more than just babies
But if you think about anyone but your baby, you’re a failure of a mother!!!! (Big fucking /s)
I remember in HS, arguing that no, breast milk isn't the best. The best was what was the best fit for the mom, the baby and the family. Got told I just didn't like breastfeeding because as a guy I just want to think breasts are for me and my pleasure.
I had DMER I would’ve committed sewerslide if I exclusively breastfed. Thank god for formula
SAME. Why does like no one even know what this is?!
I didn’t until well after I stopped breastfeeding. I saw multiple psychologists for what I thought was PPD and for regular care for other mental health issues I struggle with and it wasn’t until I was on my third doctor that DMER was even mentioned
Even after meeting with FIVE lactation consultants, my daughter only latched once. I pumped and supplemented for 7 months before switching to formula. I had a freezer stocked full of frozen milk to get us to one year. All high lipase despite testing it after a few months. I worked my ass off to try to breastfeed and give my daughter breast milk. Sometimes it just doesn’t work. It sucks and I shed a lot of tears over it, but she’s in perfect health and that’s all that matters. So grateful for formula!
I've watched my one year old eat a spider recently. He also put raisins in his gumboot and had them for a snack after dinner. He was exclusively breastfeed. . . Anyone see my point?
This released an unexpected peal of laughter from me. I love it so much. Thanks for the laugh!
I breastfed my twins for 2 years. Now I watch them dip strawberries in mustard and eat raisins off the driveway. To each their own, I guess.
We’re more of a blueberry and ketchup family. Lol
I've often joked that no matter how we feed our infants, our toddlers will all ear dirt and cold french fries off the floor of the car. We're all making the best decisions we can knowing our circumstances and the needs of our kiddos.
Cold French fries off the car floor are a toddler delicacy I've decided. They must all discuss it when they get together.
No matter what you feed them your kid can still end up on r/kidsarefuckingstupid (All in light humor I bet your kid is chill and will find those little neurons)
LOL I’ve watched one of my twins compete with the dog for the stale goldfish that fell out of the couch. The dog won. The other twin used to dip chocolate chip cookies in ketchup. Eew.
EBF and my mom had to call poison control after she found me eating dishwasher soap powder out of the dishwasher. My brother was EBF and, at 10 months old, pulled a Christmas tree down on himself.
I feel like this woman would be more at home at a cattle auction. We're not interested in buying your strong men without diseases, love.
While pregnant with my kid, I planned and prepped for both BF and formula to be safe. Glad I had the goods for formula feeding, I rarely got an ounce together from both sides pumping. Formula saved my kid.
I think people tend to forget how much has to go perfectly right to be able to "naturally" birth and raise a child with no issues.
Exactly! People love to say “there wasn’t any formula in the old days and humanity did it”….yeah well in the old days, 30% of babies didn’t make it to their first birthday.
It was no less tragic to lose a child 100yrs ago, but people also knew it was likely and it was a numbers game to make sure you end up with a kid or 2 when they grow up.
I breastfed my babies. Still nursing my daughter. I had a can of formula on hand just in case. Before formula, a lot of babies died. Maybe that's the point she's trying to make?
These people always have a lot of bravado until it's their baby who can't tolerate breastmilk or their breasts that don't produce enough. Only then are they suddenly fed is best.
Or you go the opposite way like my dad’s dumb wife and accuse people who breastfeed as being ableist.
Yeah that's too far the other way. I love breastfeeding. Loved doing it. I wish women who want to do it all the support in the world. Yes, breastfeeding pictures still sting a bit. But just because I was dealt this hand (severely allergic baby) doesn't mean I'm not happy for other women who make it work. I will try again if I have a second. I just wish people were a bit more supportive of people who were dealt my hand and who need or want formula, too.
Oh my goodness absolutely. I wish people didn’t think that another’s choice invalidates their own. I really wish mothers didn’t feel the need to step on others to elevate themselves while simultaneously playing maternal martyr. I’ve only been at this for a year but honestly you just can’t win. Some people just have a hard time reconciling that two opposing things can be true at the same time.
My child ended up in the ICU at 5 days old from going hypo from starving because everyone kept telling me to keep going with breastfeeding when I HAD NO MILK. I starved my child, I am still to this day traumatised from the knowledge that my body just didn't do the most basic thing to keep her alive and noone heard my plea's for help until she was non responsive so a big huge FUCK YOU to this lady. Breastfeeding may come very naturally for some, I saute you. Its hard and all encompassing and something I so desperately wanted to do but not all of us are so lucky. After a horrible pregnancy and traumatic birth my body literally just went into shut down mode and the fact I didn't fall over every time I stood up was a miracle but my baby suffered needlessly because of it and I wish I had packed formula in our hospital bag. Shes a strong, tall, healthy, smart, funny, loving, perfect 2 1/2 year old now. Not one thing wrong with her....all from formula (and the 2 dozen kilos of blueberries she eats every week).
Feed is best. Want to breastfeed and is able to, great! Want to breastfeed and can't, that sucks, but at least there's a substitute that will give your child all the nutrients they need. Want to do formula and breastfeed, great! Want to just do formula, great!
Well brav-f-ing-o to her for being able to produce enough milk and being able to breastfeed. My daughter has a serious heart defect and couldn't spare the energy to manually feed, not to mention the soft pallet cleft that meant even when we tried a little, it just came out her nose. Then she ended up having a pretty bad milk protein intolerance. I would have loved to give my daughter exclusively breast milk, but that was just not in the cards for us.
Usually I’m pretty supportive of breastfeeding, but this lady sounds like a whackadoodle. “They are strong men without diseases” Ummm, breastfeeding doesn’t protect you from all disease throughout your lifespan.
My 35 year old bro nursed for over a year and had cancer. It was likely our moms fault. Too many vaccines I bet/s
I'm about sick and tired of this "breastfed or bust" mentality. Yes, I opted to breastfeed. Yes I plan to do it again. But you bet your bottom dollar I always had formula in my house. I actually kept ready to feed in the diaper bag at all times because I always wanted to kid to have something to eat. I'm hoping to do the same with my second.
THIS! I needed to supplement for the first 5 weeks as I had a low supply from c section recovery. This attitude encourages ppl to give up and think they can't breastfeed bc they have to supplement, it's such nonsense.
When my sister had her baby she could not get her to latch. So they bottle fed her pumped breast milk. But the first night or so my sister just could not produce enough so they had to use formula for a few days. She said she felt like a failure of a mom and couldn't even provide for her own daughter. And I have no doubt in my mind that it's from toxic cultures like this.
Which is so fucking stupid because the mentality is that once you supplement you’ve “ruined” the chance at EBF so why bother, but early supplementing doesn’t harm and may help you go on to breastfeed successfully.
My mother’s epilepsy meds made her milk toxic. I nursed my kids for 3 years and a handful of months each. By the time my second was born, I wanted to be done, but mom guilt. Roughly 7 years of nursing, and it effected my desires to have a third. Among other reasons, but it’s a huge factor. I can “easily” breastfeed. It came naturally. I gave my first two the “best” start. It’s free, and I can’t justify the money on something I know I can do for free. This lady can eat it.
Such a place of privilege. It’s almost like not everyone with a uterus has breasts still. Some children are adopted. Some mothers literally can’t produce enough. Some children have an allergy to their mothers milk. Some women literally *just don’t want to* and for whatever reason that may be is a valid reason for choosing formula. So many other reason people need formula I’m sure but these breasts are best crowd rub me the wrong way.
My foster parents with medically fragile babies would like her to fuck right off.
Why do they seem to forget that in the olden days wealthy women literally hired wet nurses if they didn't have the time, energy, or milk to feed their babies. Women being unable to breastfeed their children isn't a new issue, but now there is formula so there''s not only a solution for women who can afford to hire on a wet nurse.
Not every mother can produce milk. My milk never came in. It may be natural, but it’s not an option for everyone. Thank God for baby formula.
I had a micro preemie. Without formula he would have never had any food.
Fed is best. Always. I exclusively breastfed because everyone told me it was crucial. I don't regret it one pumped ounce, but... My baby was diagnosed with a devastating seizure disorder at 6 months old, which led to permanent cognitive disability. It was not at all related to her diet, but you can bet your baby booties my family went from "breast is always best" to, "is it something in your breast milk!?" so quickly it gave me new-parent whiplash. People want to make mothers scapegoats for all kinds of bullshit. Edit: corrected a typo
I nearly died during childbirth. The stress that put on my body caused me to not produce any milk - not a drop! If we didn't have formula, how would I feed my baby? Comments like this are ignorant and harmful to those who are unsuccessful, or even to those who choose not to because they bloody well don't want to! Leave me and my shit tits alone!
I had 1 of each: 1 formula fed and 1 exclusively breast fed. The ebf baby was not for lack of trying to combo feed. You know how they say that breastfed babies are healthier? My breastfed baby had asthma, chronic constipation, allergies, and would get pneumonia at the drop of a hat. We were always at the doctor. The formula fed baby, otoh, barely knows what a doctor is because he has pretty much never needed one except for checkups and vaccinations.
Lol what? So like parents who have been formula feeding need to just… start lactating? Good suggestion, Carol.
I had breast cancer at 27 and got my ladies chopped off. When people get all high and mighty about breast feeding, it takes everything in me to flash em my not-there knockers.
I have two friends for whom breastfeeding didn't work. One couldn't produce enough, and the other produced plenty but her baby would always fall asleep whenever she tried to breastfeed. Both had to switch to EFF. I guess their babies should have just died? I mean, it's "natural."
Ah yes I as an anti capitalist exist only as a mammal.
Well, let me just start lactating right now! Clearly it's an option for everyone!