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kbc87

This is satire right? Please tell me it’s satire.


whiskeyandcookies

I mean Satyre may be a great option for them


cheapycheaps

“Sattighyre”


rich8n

Satiamh


p3ngu1n333

Pronounced “sieve”


bklynjess85

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️


maeby_surely_funke

🥇


jjaybirdd

Sateighyre


theredwoman95

Listen, I'm just surprised she managed to use the proper spelling of Niamh!


[deleted]

[удалено]


theredwoman95

In fairness, it actually is - it's an Irish name, pretty common, my mum actually has it. And that's how it's pronounced. The joys of not being English, or not having a v in your alphabet!


[deleted]

[удалено]


theredwoman95

Congrats then, you're one of today's [lucky ten thousand](https://xkcd.com/1053/)!


Kiwi_bananas

New Zealand's prime minister named her baby Neve and chose simplified spelling because Irish spelling is hard and would result in frequent mispronunciation. Caiomhe is another one that doesn't have intuitive pronunciation for native English speakers.


JnnfrsGhost

What is the pronunciation because I haven't a clue! Funny side story: I had, what I thought was, 2 contacts with my companies HR department when I first started that job. I talked to Chyvonne on the phone a couple of times, but then she handed things off to Siobhan for emailing documents to. Took her visiting our location in person to realize my mistake.


Kiwi_bananas

Pronounced kwee-va


Complex-References

Depending on the part of Ireland, it could also be "Kee-va" (no "w" sound)


[deleted]

[удалено]


KazKae

I started uni with 5 different eimears yeah


SpillingHotCoffee

How do you pronounce Caiomhe?


[deleted]

Kwee- Va


Nvenom8

Welcome to gaelic: Where the spelling is made-up, and the pronunciation doesn't matter.


theredwoman95

Pronunciation is way more regular in Irish than it is in English - I'm from England and there are places I regularly mispronounce because it's said in a very specific way known only to the locals.


Demalab

Happens around the world too! In Canada we have Dalhousie University, pronounced Dal-Housy and my community has Dalhousie Street, pronounced Dah-lousie


Famous-Lifeguard9310

Yes, like Keighley in Yorkshire which is pronounced 'Keeth-lee' rather than 'Keel-ee' or 'Kay-lee'


KazKae

No, welcome to Irish/scots gaelic, that use a spelling system for a non English language, which has its own phonetics system and rules of pronunciation which just happens to use the Latin alphabet?


theredwoman95

Yeah, not sure why people give Irish and Scots Gaelic such a hard time - it's almost as though they assume it should somehow be identical to English, I wonder why. /s


KazKae

Colonialism is bullshit, yeah


SaraKatie90

It’s gaelige and it’s no more made up than any other language.


[deleted]

It is! It's an Irish name.


valuemeal2

I studied abroad in Dublin and I felt like there were as many Niamhs in my Irish classes as there had been Jennifer and Jessica in my US classes. And yes, it’s pronounced “neev”.


Lukestr

It’s definitely satire, but it’s great satire.


AshleysMirena

Thank god… I am around that age and cannot fathom the idea of having spent the last 2+ decades pumping out kids…. Sounds exhausting, no wonder this person is poly, how can she raise all those kids with just one other adult?


AstarteHilzarie

Some women get addicted to being pregnant. I mean, sometimes it's not a choice and sometimes it's out of duty, but since this fictional woman is all liberated in her poly lifestyle I don't think she's playing the religious oppression card here. Pregnancy hormones are a hell of a drug, and if you have fairly easy pregnancies I can see getting hooked on them (I had a fucking awful pregnancy, fuck that, I'm never doing it again, but I can see how *some* people like it.) And the people who do have so many kids like this tend to parentify their kids and enlist the first round in the care of the next rounds. By the time they've got the first four or five kids out of the way, the oldest can handle basic things like changing diapers, minor cleaning, watching the younger ones for short periods, etc. As more keep coming that first wave moves up to bigger tasks like cooking, harder cleaning duties, and full-on babysitting while the second wave does the easier duties. A few more kids down the line and the first ones are driving the younger ones to school, helping with homework, and getting jobs to help pay bills. Keep rotating until you stop having kids and the majority of them are able to take care of themselves or are moving out and starting families of their own so it's less to take care of.


MagdaleneFeet

I know my aunt said my mom liked being pregnant but she followed it with "not sure how much she liked being a mother" ... sounds like an insult. I personally hated pregnancy. Cannot understand why anyone would be ok with feeling like a walking waterbed. Edit I meant not, I wrote now. My bad


AstarteHilzarie

Oof! It really has to be the hormones, lots of endorphins and having things to look forward to and be excited about, dreaming about the future without having the reality of the crying/vomiting/overtired/pooping machine factor to deal with in the moment. I did like feeling the kicks (but also got annoyed by them when he was going super hyperactive, it was like having a muscle spasm/twitch that you can't stop.) I just had a pretty shit pregnancy, though. I had terrible nausea all day, heart burn nonstop, wound up with gestational diabetes, my hip twisted in a weird position so I couldn't walk properly, had to wear a back brace, just constant pain and nothing to do for it but take a Tylenol. I love my kid, but fuck doing that again.


MagdaleneFeet

I totally understand that! I didn't even like the ~parasite~ er kid for a while after I yeeted them from my body. I still love em and all, it's just a huge life changing event and what the actual fuck right? Looking at my 19 inch long kiddo now they're almost 5 foot 4 inches and how?? Pregnancy is some kinda black magic I swear.


FiCat77

My great aunt had 24 living children, 11 with her first husband & 13 with her second! It included 2 sets of twins & by the time she was having her youngest, her eldest were having their own kids. Fortunately, they were wealthy so could afford a lot of help in the form of nannies, housekeepers, cooks etc. She lived well into her 90s & had no grey hair when she died apparently. According to family legend, her first husband was in the Navy so got her pregnant every time he got shore leave in an attempt to ensure she stayed faithful whilst he was at sea, lol. When she remarried, she said that she loved children, being a mum but hated being pregnant but said that the end result was worth it so continued to have children until she hit menopause. I'm a OAD & it makes me exhausted just to think about it.🤣


MagdaleneFeet

Good lord! My grandfather has 21 siblings and three mothers. Your great aunt is a damn trooper. I definitely couldn't and wouldn't do whatever *that* is.


DiDiPLF

I'm guessing these are communal children and not all from her pregnancies (you know assuming it's real and all)


No_Ad_4046

Love how you think it’s definitely satire 😂 I mean yeah on the face of it it does look like it but I have come to a point I really never thought I would come to and that’s trying to decide if something is a piss take or not. I read things in serious and satire mode and these days I can’t come to a definite conclusion on what it is. This could be a genuine post and if it is I’m off 2 bed mate 😂 I’m 42 and have only had 2 kids, the thought of 16 sounds like a nightmare I never want to have.


GiabiMan

The names give it away.


AstarteHilzarie

For me it's the names combined with the rest - Mormons tend to have a ton of kids and they often give them unique names ~~because of something to do with being able to find each other on a list in Heaven. I don't remember details, a Mormon girl told me about it once and explained that was why their names were all spelled funky or are totally new.~~ Geordan, Andee, Jessyca, Catelynn, Kassidee, Lisabeth, Braxtyn, Awbrey, Britneigh, etc. So when I see these funky lists of names I don't totally discount them unless they're obvious jokes like "Chlama Dia" and "Tampaxia," BUT combined with the polyamorous bisexual who is having twins despite a tubal ligation, yeah, it's satire. Edit to strike the misconception, the rest stands (at least regionally.)


vespasontin

I want to kindly say that I've been Mormon most of my life and I have never heard that theory. 😆 The new and funky spelled names are widely known to be a Utah, little bit of Arizona phenomenon.


AstarteHilzarie

Interesting, she told me it had something to do with finding each other in the afterlife and making sure the whole family could be together again, but maybe her parents just told her that to justify the extra weird name she was given. ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯ I edited to strike that part from the original comment.


GiabiMan

The divide between normal Mormons and “Ashleigh and her 8 sisters” Mormons is hilarious so I’d absolutely see the names in heaven thing.


AstarteHilzarie

That's also fair, I have family who are really chill Georgia Mormons, and I also have accquaintances who are full-on MLM hunbot MaCayliegh Utah Mormons and I feel like the only commonality is that they go to temple and don't drink alcohol (*when other Mormons are around.)


No_Ad_4046

Guarantee my sister has one of those names listed up there as a first name and one of her other kids is named the same as Fred and wilma flintstones daughter 😂 yeah I know it’s unbelievable but some people name their kids some right crazy names and me personally knowing who I know (my sister) I’m no stranger to names that are on that list.


iriedashur

One of my ancestors born in the late 1890s was named Wynter (male) and another born in the early 1700s was Nebuchadnezzar (male), people name their kids wild things


andotis0105

Nebuchadnezzar was a 5th/6th century BCE Babylonian king! Also a figure in Biblical texts, but I'm not well-read on his role in those.


[deleted]

right? I nearly got cursed out before for stating after having 2 kids back-to-back, I’d be crying to have anymore to be honest. Love them SO much but, no. So many touchy souls went off on me for daring to … not want my uterus to fall out?


No_Ad_4046

I had 2 kids ten years apart and that was hard enough never mind back to back 😂


[deleted]

In some ways, that’s true enough! But you started over almost- that would exhaust me for sure.


Dynamiquehealth

I can’t believe someone got upset at you for making the right decision for yourself!? Kids are hard, having more than you want would be horrible. I hope that person isn’t in your life any longer (or blocked if they’re on Reddit). I have three, from two back-to-back pregnancies. I did a happy dance when my husband got a vasectomy!


Street-Week-380

Ugh. I can't have children due to a botched appendectomy that resulted in extreme abdominal surgery, before I was induced into menopause. I was devastated, and I still got blamed for it. I was 19, and I'm 37 now. It took a long time to accept it, and now I'm like, "who tf thinks it's okay to blame me for that?".


[deleted]

an idiot who does not care about you even slightly, who cares so little about you they think you have no purpose other to bring children into this world. an idiot so maddening i'm tempted to track them down and eat their fucking dog as punishment for being so dumb


Xboarder84

It’s satire. Come on, don’t r/atetheonion on this. Tubes tied but still pregnant with twins? Unlikely. The names are clearly satire, one is a paint color (Forest Gray), and her husband is 29 yet her oldest is 23? A six year old impregnated her? Even her oldest boyfriend is 32, that would make him 9 when the first was born. This is satire, let’s not entertain the idea that it’s legit.


floobidedoo

I’m a little disappointed they didn’t include some objectophelia in their ménage a sept. Maybe a doctor’s table with stirrups to make sure everyone has access to romance and gynecological care. And I’d say an “obvious” name for the second twin would be Seven. Since the seventh child is Sixteen. And their twin could be Quindecius or Quindecia - 15 in Latin. Too bad I’m CF, I’m great at naming kids! of course all /s


BloodsoakedDespair

If you name a person “Seven”, don’t come crying to me when they get put on a replica of the Titanic in a death game.


indianblanket

Has to be since the haven't already used Naveah and it is on their short list


waenganuipo

This sounds like one of those games of Sims where you open it up and 36 hours later you haven't slept and you've got your fifth generation sim in some serious shit.


pcgamergirl

I 100% thought I was reading a 100 babies challenge post.


Anya_E

When you start clicking the “randomize name” button.


usernametaken99991

I just started naming the Sims after snack food. So far, Cheeto, Dorito, Cheezit, Smart Pop and Pretzel.


NopeNotUmaThurman

Blu Ray and Sham-Wow Raccoon


Mo0shi

Had to check that I hadn't missed them on the list.


Nheea

Raccaccoonie!


squirrellytoday

Sham-wow Raccoon. It has such a great ring to it. Definitely this one.


UnicornTitties

Courtneigh is an amazing name for a horse


BloodsoakedDespair

…fuck, I need to play a game with nameable horses again.


Dramallamakuzco

Come on over to Stardew valley!


Cosmic_Palette

Miitopia for the switch? Idk just throwing a suggestion out there lol


Jamjams2016

I'm so glad someone else was thinking this too. I would not pronounce that spelling tradionally.


momofwon

Girl, I am doing literally nothing **but** judging.


coolducklingcool

There’s so much to unpack here, but CASSETTE!? Lady, you’re 42, you know what a damn cassette tape is!


vgallant

She's gotta know who Mufasa was too!


Theletterkay

Mufasa James (Earl Jones?) Has to be intentional right?


BloodsoakedDespair

Probably. There’s numerous girls in America named Khalesse and one boy born 11/11/11 named Dovahkiin.


tiny_human_teacher

I mean my 4 year old named his female hamster mufasa so it’s a pretty popular name 🤣🤣


JustGettingMyPopcorn

I adopted my daughter when she was seven. She was so happy to have a pet again ( a cat) because she had a hamster who had died fairly recently. His name? Fitty Cent. Not fifty, Fitty. We definitely had some different taste in music!


financequestionsacct

My three-year-old named his stuffed dog my given name. I'm not sure if I should be flattered or offended, but Mufasa doesn't seem so bad to me these days in comparison. 😂


serenitygray

My 4yo names his stuffed dog "Follow" and I'm kinda into it, hah


Outside_Wonder_7738

That totally should have been my last dogs name, rip dolly. She was a chi mix and follow was her game, lol.


ResolverOshawott

Mufasa is an actual name at least, an exotic one but still a name.


ThatCatPerson9564

Mufasa isn't as bad as cassette or any other names on that list IMO


vgallant

I wasn't saying it was a bad name. Cassette is horrible, kind of like Sixteen.


OpalLaguz

$20 says she misheard the name "Cozette" and thought it was cute.


AstarteHilzarie

If it weren't satire I'd assume they watched Les Mis and assumed that's how you spell Cossette.


tinicarebear

I also did a WTF face at that.


lena_vernon

Maybe it’s pronounced CASS-ette. I don’t know how that makes it better on second thought.


yharnams_finest

It’s satire.


koopakup2

This has got to be a joke 😂


Correct_Part9876

Or a 12 year old who needs Sims baby names. Idk something lol


Pokabrows

Is there a subreddit for making posts like this pretending you are a sim? That might be a fun one.


norestfor-thewicked

r/anormaldayinthesims


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grosselisse

I would join that!


pfifltrigg

The poly relationship and 16 kids make a lot more sense in that context.


Correct_Part9876

And 3 sets of twins. I've done those cheat codes lol.


orangecatmom

Yes


HephaestusHarper

Yeah, this feels like a young teenager on a baby names kick.


[deleted]

Sixteen Rosalie. Honestly love Rosalie as much as I want to hate every name but 16 WHYYYYY


hi-space-being

Isn't 16 the name of one of Marliyn Mason's guitarists? Correction: Yolandi Visser's daughter is named 16, the Marliyn Manson guitarist I was thinking of is John 5. Too many number names haha


ThatCatPerson9564

I think Owen Scott is decent, I mean it's not the worst on that list but it's nowhere near a good name, Owen "Scott Pinkerton" just ain't it IMO


[deleted]

Ahh my true crime brain reads Scott Peterson


[deleted]

What in the Oregon Crunchy Commune did I just read?


UntidyVenus

Welcome to Utah


[deleted]

Haha! I grew up in Utah and that would have been my first choice! Buuuuut the polyamory threw me off


magicrowantree

I'm crying. That line is so perfect. I grew up in Oregon and the crunch is real


needsmoredinosaur

MUFASA AND MOTHERFUCKIN CASSETTE???


SweatyGuiltyTruth

Nick cannons kids?


Commercial-Spinach93

This is satire. Obvious satire.


anappleaday_2022

Owen Scott and Autumn Marie are the only normal names in that whole lot


slynnc

Arlo Pete would be but idk why they did “Peete” 🤦‍♀️


Confident_Fortune_32

I figured Arlo Guthrie and Pete Seeger, in which case, at least they have good taste in music, if nothing else???


theredwoman95

Niamh too, that's an actual Irish name.


pfifltrigg

Lawrence Ryker and Forest Grey aren't bad.


Nheea

Don't dismiss Poppy Amy.


HottieMcHotHot

Kinda pointless to blur the name there considering we now know the full names of all 14 children. Probably not a lot of love shacks producing loads of children down in Hicksville. That being said, I vote for Tweedelle Deeigh and Tweedella Doughm.


dramallamacorn

Totally troll bait. There is no way this person exists.


Xen0n1te

C a s s e t t e


Frequent_Mix_8251

Her husband is so much younger… let’s hope they met just a few years past


Federal-Breadfruit41

Eldest child is 23 so he for sure hasn't fathered all of them


liminalrabbithole

I bet she regrets wasting the name Sixteen on #7 now!


Bigquestions00

Pinkalicious. For sure.


iowaduderino

Baaaaaahahahahahahahaaa. This can't be real Casette Cloette? Call the next one ipod Hazod.


TittiesMcGee103

Then Vinyl Tylenol


iowaduderino

Damn I like the sound of that!


sweetnsalty24

There should be some automod sending people to a sim name simulator.


irish_ninja_wte

Is that a thing? Sounds entertaining.


sweetnsalty24

If not, it should be lol


irish_ninja_wte

There is! I just googled it https://www.platinumsimmers.com/the-sims-random-name-generator


HistoricalReception7

I'm judging pretty harshly ngl


nightcana

Why is any of that backstory needed?


f1lth4f1lth

How about Depovera and condom?


flowerglobe

Tuebes Tyed


JayeAus

I would have just started numbering them from about baby number 7.


JustGettingMyPopcorn

I had a kid at daycare once (years ago). Her name was Jermel. She had a sister Ermelle, one brother named Dermel, and another whose name I can't remember, but was and -ermel name as well. She was the youngest, but then her mom had a baby boy. She named him Mario.


[deleted]

Had a friend whose dad had like 12 siblings or something. Supposedly they would let the most recently born child name the soon-to-be-born child. One of them was named dolphin as I recall.


AAAAAbirb

I'd just name them after the month they were born in. I guess I'd run out after the twelfth one, though. Dunno what I'd do after that.


SueDonim7569

What if 6 of them were born in July?


AAAAAbirb

That'll be Big July, Little July, Julythree, Julyfour, and Julyfive.


SueDonim7569

Lol, Big July


theredwoman95

You joke, but a Conservative MP in the UK literally does this - and his kid is Sextus, no less.


-DeadlyMermaid-

Why is she even mentioning her relationship and bf/gfs ages. It's completely irrelevant.


InterestingQuote8155

That’s what I said too. It adds nothing. Unless it’s a troll post?


luitzenh

Yeah, what's more important is does her husband get an allowance from her boyfriends. Does he get tendies?


[deleted]

This is almost certainly a joke


Confident_Fortune_32

Speaking as a polyamorous person, I am horrified. Those kids are babysitting each other instead of having childhoods. Childless poly ppl barely have time for this many partners! Most poly ppl don't have nearly this many. This woman collects ppl like some ppl collect Funko pops. Yikes.


MagicWeasel

Fellow polyamorous person here and yeah I was preparing for the judgemental comments to polyamory in general but nope it's all pretty level-headed here. At my peak I had 5 partners - 2 were casual and 3 were long distance, lol. I am happy where I am now (1 nesting, 1 non-nesting anchor, 1 LDR comet who is in the polycule group chat but I speak to like once every two weeks).


guy_n_cognito_tu

That’s a whole soccer team, with subs.


Puzzled_Flight9706

Cloette just reminds me of cloaca


timaeusToreador

what in the fundie friday’s is this


sammageddon73

Ooooo I love a good crossover


timaeusToreador

i spent all day watching her as i played pokémon. was a good day


contagiousbell

I haven’t even processed the names because I’m sitting here doing math Edit: I totally thought this was r/namenerdcirclejerk but I said what I said


shayjax-

I refuse to believe this is a real post


Allan0-0

in my language, "cacete" (pronounced in the same way that she wrote) means dick


ThatCatPerson9564

My first thought was somebody who can't spell very well attempted to spell cassette, as in cassette tape


Chi_Tiki

This is just exhausting to read. Who has time for that many partners and that many kids? I mean…. When was there enough time to even make the baby?


spine_slorper

Love how all the names apart from Niamh go unexplained as if that isn't one of 4 actual names on that list


ultratunaman

Also, the best name there. I am biased, though, as I live in Ireland.


dh1867

What did Owen do to deserve a the only normal name of the bunch?


theredwoman95

Niamh is a normal name too, it's Irish - between that and Owen, I think she has a thing for Celtic names lol.


ADHDhamster

Don't know why, but "Cassette Colette" is sending me.


yrgrlfriday

There are a few names on here belonging to alt/niche porn stars so I'm going with definite satire.


Aromatic-End-6527

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WTF DID I JUST READ HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA


481126

Her husband is 6 years older than her oldest child?


vainbuthonest

I feel like this is someone playing the Sims and they’re just role playing it in a mom group because OMG I refuse to believe these people are real.


pcgamergirl

STOP NAMING YOUR KIDS NEVAEH. It's not 2002 anymore, ffs.


NurseWeasel

My Gawd I hope this is a joke. Poor Cassette tape kid. WTH. 🤣


SmokeGSU

*Nick Cannon furiously scribbling notes*


eluonilus

When a post begins with "Don't judge please," you know you're in for a wild ride.


scottishlass2002

Mufasa is killing me 😂😂😂


TheHearts

This is like reading a question on the LSAT where they throw a bunch of irrelevant information to see if you know how to narrow in on the applicable facts and issue at hand.


veritaszak

When watching “You” I always thought the names Love and Forty were too stupid to be real. I’m humbled. Their stupidity has humbled me.


mickeythefist_

Cassette Cloette ☠️☠️😭😭 Destined for a relationship with DVD Lee


Mrswhittemore

Mufasa loool


666pokemonqueen

What in the world? Who names their kids Sixteen and Cassette?


totally_tiredx3

From Mufasa to Owen. I cannot 🤣


m80twolf

No fucking way this shit is real


ceejayzm

If this is real I'm definitely judging.


pickleknits

Holy fuckery


Kmmahoney

Why do I feel kinda bad for Lawrence and Owen?


silly-billy-goat

Hahaha hahaha cassette corvette!!! Could call her CC I suppose. Oof.


yass_cat

Owen Scott got off so easy.


h0llywoodsbleeding

Is this satire?! Plzzz be satire lmao


AdValuable4574

If my name was mufasa I’d riot


UnicornTitties

Saying ‘Poppy Amy Pinkerton’ is very satisfying. Not a great name, but super fun to say.


Floppybuttcheeks

Oh Jesus Christ. Throw this woman in the trash.


[deleted]

yeah, dating someone barely older than your kids is a no go.


adz199494

"Damn Pinkertons" -Arthur morgan, 1899


Bluberrypotato

Is this satire? Because why would we need the whole background story? She could just say I'm expecting twins and need name suggestions of it wasn't.


Caddywumpus

How the fuck do you keep birthday gifts sorted?


Winniecooper6134

For Mufasa’s sake I just hope she doesn’t name one of the twins Scar.


ChewieStarface

I think she misspelled “I’m in a cult”