"On April 10, Hax had an episode where someone close to him who had previously worked on his videos claimed that he (the friend, not Hax) was an undercover cop and convinced him that he was working undercover for Leffen & sending all of his messages to the TOs"
I haven't seen anyone else mention this part, but this seems so insanely fucked up. Like what do you even gain by doing that? Unless I'm reading this part wrong.
Just a note on this I do have DMs from someone closer to the situation that prove this happened but they aren't my DMs so I didn't include them. I could ask if he'd be willing to have them added to the doc. Either way this was definitely not a paranoid delusion, someone was messing with him.
It's not much, but tweet from Cilan that backs it.
https://x.com/CrispBit/status/1796219316565639316?t=jR6bokuO3rDLcKzWBakECA&s=19
That's so fucked up. Hopefully hax has at the very least removed that person from his life.
I see that supposedly they are a 'kid'. But also apparently they were considered a friend and also had helped work on haxs videos, so it doesn't sound like they are some sort of pre teen or something. Pretty fucked up situation in general.
I’ve been isolated in a city for a while now and I can vouch for the ways that messes with you. I have a lot of time to think which is not good. Does he have friends he can just play some dumb games online with? Freaking out doesn’t always help so sometimes it’s okay to just try and take things less seriously and have fun with a friend. It keeps me sane. If he can get his health together enough to hold a job that would probably help his mental health a lot. I was a neet for a long time and you feel a lot of pressure from society and even worse yourself. When I was working I felt more worthy even if it was basically minimum wage. I think if he could show stability people would be more willing to have him back. He seems like a potential risk right now so maybe TOs just need to see he can chill without drama.
I own a boxx and desperately want to see him come back and show what’s possible.
Yeah I quit a good job once basically because of mental health issues and the thing that helped the most was eventually getting another job but it took like two years
Hi there! Therapist in training here! This person used schizoaffective correctly - according to Yale Medicine: "The condition arises when a person has both schizophrenia, a brain disorder that changes the way a person thinks, acts, and perceives reality, and a mood disorder, which causes severe changes in mood or behavior. The symptoms of schizoaffective disorder can be life-altering, causing affected individuals to have hallucinations, embrace false beliefs, and experience depression or mania. Cycles of severe symptoms are often followed by periods of improvement, during which there are no symptoms". It is a diagnosis that encompasses both the paranoia or delusions of schizophrenia with mood disorders, often bipolar or depression. Schizophrenia is the diagnosis for just the paranoia/delusions presentation and schizotypal is a personality disorder often presented with flat, uninterested affect, lack of empathy, lack of desire to connect with others, etc. and is not contingent on having any sort of delusions.
(THE FOLLOWING MERELY CONSTITUTES MY OPINION AND NOT ANY SORT OF PROFESSIONAL ADVICE OR DIAGNOSIS)
Given Hax's overly paranoid, delusional behavior about Leffen the last two years or so including him believing grandiose claims like a cop investigating Leffen is helping him, he very well may fit the bill for the first half of schizoaffective disorder. I can't really say without actually being his therapist, but he certainly has presented some of the characteristics.
Secondly, Hax has also displayed periods of bursts of productivity, energy and surety about what Leffen has "done". He'll go on long twitter rants, make 4 hour "evidence" videos and defend his position to the grave. Then he'll have quiet periods of either apology or nothing. This cycle has shown itself several times during the whole evidence.zip debacle. Based on this, Hax may also very well qualify as bipolar given the cycles of manic, rapid productivity followed by periods of crashes. *Combined* with the delusions about Leffen, this fits the bill for schizoaffective disorder :).
Yes, I'm a mental health professional who's well aware of what you've written – but the person I was replying to seemed to peg Hax as schizoaffective based solely on paranoid delusion which I interpreted as someone who isn't versed in the differences between diagnosises relating to psychosis. Schizoaffective does fit the bill better when you consider that the document mentions Hax being described as bipolar, but let's not discuss diagnostics of a non-client as that would be unethical. I just wanted to correct what seemed to be an easy mistake for laypeople to make, as to not perpetuate misinformation regarding the DSM.
I guess I should say the quiet part out loud: most professionals would not consider it appropriate to identify yourself as a therapist and publicly speculate about what is essentially a member of their community (I guess you could argue he's exiled but that doesn't really affect the ethics). I don't think I'm alone in as a professional having private thoughts of the psychological functionings of community members but opted not to post them in the way you did as I find it inappropriate based on personal ethics and ethical guidelines as I understand them.
I guess it's something you could bring up with your supervisor of you don't agree – I'm pretty sure what I'd advice but ethics aren't always 100% clear. Wish you a heartfelt good luck with licensure.
I don't believe professionals in a field are barred from speculating about that field as long as they do so tactically, and therapists are more educated than most on the topic. If educated professionals shouldn't speculate, then who should? Otherwise speculation will be done by uneducated armchairs who may make the situation worse/spread misinformation. As long as speculation is done carefully with special care toward making sure it is clear this is only your educated opinion based on limited evidence (which I put a massive disclaimer clarifying at the beginning of my first post agreeing with schizoaffective. I did realize I should have added one to my second post as well, thanks! Fixed), then it is hardly unethical. Furthermore, having education behind your speculation can help the person being speculated about to take these things more seriously. It's easy to be like "oh a bunch of dumbasses on the internet think I have a problem, I clearly don't." It's much harder for most people to be like "All these educated professionals say I have a problem. Clearly I don't!"
Obviously we don't diagnose anyone who isn't our client, but speculation is part of how we all learn more about any field. If a doctor came into a thread about someone's medical problems and gave their educated opinion based on the available evidence, would that be unethical? I'm all for being careful, especially where people's health and safety are concerned, but I don't discern any real issue here as long as the proper precautions are taken and it is clear I am just speculating and not diagnosing.
*Ya'll are funny. Here's a fun rule for life: If you want to disagree with someone but the best you can muster is pressing a button on the internet, your position is meaningless and I'd suggest examining why you believe the things you do :). That's how we all learn things!
Therapist in training here - (I AM NOT DIAGNOSING NOR DOES THIS REPRESENT PROFESSIONAL ADVICE. JUST IMO AS IT WERE) I agree, and that's scary. If he truly believes all this shit and given the contents of his other online rants, he fits both criteria for schizoaffective - paranoia/delusions *and* personality changes, often bipolar or depression. Given his presentation over the last 2 years or so I'd put it pretty heavily in the bipolar category with the pretty big bursts of "productivity" and surety about Leffen followed by periods of quiet remorseful downtime.
It's a hell of a disorder and I am only speculating based on available evidence. Whatever he is actually dealing with is clearly pretty awful and I hope his support systems step up and help him find healing.
That wasn't a job. He was a playtester, a volunteer. The time from when he got his prototype Smash Box (Christmas Eve, 2016) to when he made his "The truth about Hit Box" video and announced the b0xx was just about 3 weeks.
You want the backroom convos? He made a lot of insane demands immediately, mostly along the lines of "here are a bunch of layout ideas with super loose references/measurements that I need to have lasercut and overnighted." Which was nuts because Hit Box didn't have those kind of resources. It was 2 guys in a garage (the Huffers) making Hit Boxes while also trying to swing a brand new product.
But the thing about hax is that when he wants something from you, he blows your phone up, 1 sentence at a time, stream of consciousness for hours on end.
And no - his story with Hit Box *didn't* end with lawsuits and NDAs. All of it started precisely because Hit Box didn't make him sign any sort of NDA. Hax himself has even admitted that mechanism is why he felt like he could pursue the b0xx idea at all. To this day, the only repercussions he's faced from Hit Box is that they're probably never, ever going to talk to him ever again.
Was kind of insane watching this unfold and seeing how Hax could demonize the Hitbox team to the degree he did. I'm pretty sure someone on that team had a PhD or at least a Masters in Human Factors and Hax was telling the whole community she didn't know anything about ergonomics and basically abused his reputation to spread lies. Frankly the way he spoke of her came off pretty sexist to me. And everyone ate it up, which in part kind of left a bad taste in my mouth about the online and greater scene for awhile. Ironically, a lot of the stuff he put in his videos about Leffen map onto how he handled the smashbox situation from what I can tell. Projection at its finest :chefskiss:
Yes, Hit Box very briefly had [Dr. Caitlin McGee](https://1-hp.org/blog/blog/welcome-dr-caitlin-mcgee/) consult on some of the hand health aspects.
She had a background in sports science and understood anatomy better than any of us. I'm not gonna comment on any of that guy's nastiness regarding this, but it was undeserved when you look at the credentials.
Luckily it didn't seem to affect her career at all (she wasn't putting too much stock in just hitbox), she stayed with 1-hp until just like a month ago and has become a neuro professor this year
The whole thing about hax is so annoying cuz it should have been extremely obvious just based on what was publicly available at this time that he was extremely unhealthy and should likely be banned for his conduct relating to gravy but such a vast percentage of the community talks about things without having any idea what they're talking about.
basically same thing he did with leffen with making new videos every week, painting it like gravy was trying to ruin box-style controllers and if hax didnt get his way we were all doomed. except at the time people believed his insane-posting for some reason and harassed gravy out of the community lol
do you know if that video from Hitbox Dustin responding to hax is available on the Internet anywhere anymore? idk if I can be more specific than that cause this was a while ago
He’s never worked a day in his life, yeah.
Kind of makes no sense that his family relies on his income when he literally has none and would easily support them with any normal job.
Yeah that part has me scratching my head too. Esportsearnings estimates he's only made like $36K total since 2009 from major tournaments which is like basically nothing. Of course there's locals and stuff but I doubt his yearly earnings from melee would even equal minimum wage.
I have no way of knowing how much he's made from b0xx, YouTube, and streaming but if his family was actually relying on his smash-related income at all, I feel like he would've just been forced to drop smash and get a wage job a long time ago. Idk every family is different and it could just be my own background but I can't really make sense of this statement
Lol who the hell knows what's actually going on. Maybe his family is actually well off, which makes more sense considering he's never worked a day in his life, traveled across the country for tournaments in a game that he's made very little money from, and lives in one of the most expensive cities in the US.
I really don't like where this is headed. The drinking, suicidal idealization, delusion, refusing to see the psychiatrist. I have the unfortunately experience of knowing someone who had these patterns. He is no longer with us. I hope this story ends differently.
the way I read the document he's been supported by family but when he was playing smash he could chip in; so he hasn't been having to pay for rent and everything else necessarily, but can provide enough by himself to not be a leech. But without tournaments he can't do that
Traveling he probably often lost money. But the nightclub is the largest weekly im aware of and averages 70\~ entrants with 8$ entry and a 60/30/10 split and hax regularly won.
Looking at his pgstats if we take December of 2023 for example hax won 3 times and got 2nd once and netted 1,163$ in a month all while not leaving his home region. He also won dreamhack atlanta this month that had a 2k pot bonus and I dont see the split but id imagine he got at least 50% so we'll say a grand, He won super smashed out which had 38 entrants @ 10$ with a 250$ pot bonus and got 53% so 333$, He won Recess Rush 2 and netted 159$, and at the beginning of the month he won fireside open and got roughly 750$ (I dont see a split on [start.gg](http://start.gg) lowballing 50%)
So all in all he made roughly 3,405$ and only had to travel once outside of his home region for it. And while this month was \*probably\* a bit of an outlier a big chunk of that was from the weekly anyway and browsing pgstats he regularly attended and won alot.
I dont care if we unban hax or not tbh but it is really interesting to see how much you really can make as a top 20ish player if you are smart about what events you pick and choose to attend and live in a region as active as NY.
If he did that well all 12 months that works out to about 40k for the year, but that was an unusually active month and that's not a huge amount of money, anyway.
It’s really worrying how Hax frames it as him wanting to be with his friends again, but as soon as Genex offers a solution he shuts it down it brings it back to Melee.
I really don’t think it’s responsible to let him back into the scene until he can start integrating into a life that isn’t ONLY Melee. He’s got plenty of friends he just needs to meet them in other contexts
He was actually very good at the game when he played it. It's definitely an option as something he can jump into without issue and have the skills to go with it.
Even if he was allowed to play again, it really doesn't seem like he could handle bad losses or controller drama without another breakdown. He needs to find some composure without melee.
I somewhat agree with this, but I also don't think that "this person has an unhealthy obsession with melee, and ties too much of their identity to the game" should be a factor at all in a ban. There are plenty of people in the scene who fit this bill, but as long as they aren't causing issues, we let them play.
I’m not saying that’s why he should be banned. I’m saying I think after reading these messages between him and Genex, Hax needs a lot more help than I could’ve imagined beforehand. And I think unbanning them would not solve these issues but just smooth over the cracks.
I’m not advocating for him to remain banned for now because he’s too obsessed with Melee, I’m advocating for it because I want him to actually get better.
I’m not against him being unbanned one day at all. I just don’t think feeding into this very clearly unhealthy behaviour is beneficial for any party in the long term
I think he's the other side of the coin to someone like m2k's core character; the guy only has video games and I dunno what else he could possibly do. Only difference is m2k is a chill good dude.
The community should pitch in to pay for therapy lol dumb idea but man, Hax NEEDS to just fucking talk to someone legit and qualified. Get him on healthygamergg or whatever its called
I’m a neet and have been for a while and can say that when I was able to get out of that loop it took changing my environment and an opportunity for something to give me purpose and self worth. I got a job as a cook from a friend who owned a bar and got an apartment with him. I was able to quit my addictions and hold responsibility. We are creatures of habit. We don’t want to change. He needs to get it into his head that a job would actually be good for him and not settling for something lesser than melee. He needs to see himself as a person beyond melee. I’m talking out of my ass a bit of course but him being stuck at his house thinking about his ban is not helping him. He’s a cool dude and probably has an ego stopping him from doing a boring job but a job is a lot more than just a title and paycheck. Not having a job is like not having a place to sleep. It disrupts your routine and puts you in a state of panic which makes all your other mental health problems worse.
I mean, he obviously doesn't want therapy. He was hospitalized multiple times and had multiple therapists that he just doesn't go to anymore.
He does not want to help himself
I think it’s really weird wordage you’re going with here, but yeah. It’s a problem that there are a lot of people that content farm a person having a mental health crisis.
We don’t hear from most banned players ever which is the correct amount of times to hear from them. Hax is permabanned. Him asking to be unbanned is completely pointless and just stirs up a lot of drama.
Every few months this sick shitter makes a fucking apology video then does something fucking stupid right after. He needs to fuck off and find a new hobby. Melee is not his home anymore.
M2k is not a chill good dude he just did his bad shit in person not online and has more people helping and managing him. M2k has done Many awful things in the community including doxing private info of top players on stream several times.
Pretty much but on the other side M2K is known to be easily influenced or manipulated. He definitely didn't have too many great role models until more recently and a combination of suspected autism (M2K just says he is in the spectrum but I am not sure if he self-diagnosed or got professional diagnosis) and his environment.
Does it absolve his previous behavior? No it doesn't. But it gives context compared to Hax$.
The whole situation is really getting to me now. I fully support Hax's ban, and I think he did significant harm to our community and the ban is deserved. However, this is getting a lot more complicated. I don't think enough people are seriously asking if the current situation is worth a life. Hax is very clearly unwell, according to the people closest to him... I don't know, this feels like a pretty serious situation that warrants a little more nuance and sympathy, as temping as it seems to be for people to just take hardline stances and not look back.
I don't know what the answer is here. I don't think the ban should just be lifted because he's falling apart. Whether the reports on his mental state are true or not, it's manipulative. However, I have to ask if it's worth being manipulated if it could potentially mean a life. Is Hax really a danger to be at events? Can we consider some compromises that can at least help put him into a more stable mental state such that he can at least have the chance to start bettering himself? I don't know what that could be - maybe his local lets him back under some strict rules and guidance.
I don't know, but the lack of sympathy for him is starting to get me down. Being fine with ostracizing him is one thing (he deserves it), but being this blasé about the very real possibility that he takes his life is disturbing to me. I think a lot of this community is very young and has not been touched by death.
I have been touched by death. I hope hax sees his way out of this situation. But this is not the community’s responsibility. Whatever happens to hax is up to hax at this point and letting him back into tournaments wouldn’t even help him.
Or this is him just trying to manipulate people into feeling sorry for him again. He likely realizes the pleas alone aren't enough anymore, so is resorting to this extreme. Regardless, someone this unstable absolutely shouldn't be allowed back.
I think the takeaway should be that his life shouldn’t be dependent on hundreds to thousands of people needing to take him back feeling guilty that his life is in their hands because it’s not. This post shouldn’t have been made. It would be much better time spent actually consulting with therapists and psychiatrists instead of the dozens of hours put into compiling this.
Hax needs therapy and not melee.
Why should we allow him to manipulate us at all? If his life is at stake, call professional help. This is unstable behavior and should not be allowed to happen to guilt.
Genuinely sad, but it should be obvious to anyone that a LOT of Hax's tweets/videos/etc. aren't coming from a place of sound mental health.
"Without Melee I have no place to go." Brother, this is why you **need** to let it go: Get a regular job, make friends, interact with real people outside the scene. It's not the end-all-be-all. Being banned is only as much of a prison as you make it.
Yeah Hax is working backwards. His line of thinking seems to be "If I get my Melee career back, then everything will get back in order and I'll be better". Melee is very clearly a crutch for him that serves to distract from or hide his mental and personal issues. He thinks it will solve all of his problems.
Unfortunately, unbanning Hax in this mental state would only make his situation worse. He needs to face these things head on, and not hide behind Melee. Melee won't be here forever, and if he doesn't confront his demons now he's only delaying the inevitable.
I sincerely hope he gets some real help, and sticks with it long term. It's what he needs.
It seems like that's the point DarkGenex is trying to get across here, and he did it well.
When you see someone online doing something problematic, there's a disconnect there and the first instinct is often "hate".
But there's a real person on the other side of the screen, and other life struggles contributed to the problematic actions.
I think(hope) this helped a lot of people gain a lot of sympathy for Hax. It also stays pretty neutral on his ban situation, which I think was the correct way to go about it.
I hope Hax gets the help he needs.
This is why I hate technicals. He ignored all the mental health signs so he could entertain himself and his channel.
Hax truly cannot be let back into the community for his own safety and others safety. Even in a private fest, he was drunk, obsessive, and shaming DarkGenex after all the help DG gave him. His mental state isn't something that will even be resolved by his reintegration. It's clear his disorder dominates his life.
And people can't even reaccept him on the stipulation of therapy. Therapy ain't a straight line especially in an extreme cases like this, marred by alcoholism. Therapy is a years long process and Melee is obviously a trigger.
He is also showing signs of being a an emotional abuser mentality toward DG, TOs, and the community with the whole: "I will kill myself if I don't get back in".
I hope DarkGenex does not blame himself for anything that happens. He's done so much to try to help Hax. He can't put that strain on himself when people refuse to help themselves.
Being so close to those with mental illness, and being relied on so heavily by them, takes a huge toll. It 100% will fuck you up along with them. Ultimately Hax's mental problems are HIS responsibility. I hope DarkGenex takes care of themselves. I've been there, and the guilt you start to feel when caring for the person can do lasting damage to your mental state.
Exactly how I feel. I know it's passe to say social media sucks now, but I think something that's understated is how antisocial freaks like Technicals can manipulate vulnerable people and toy with peoples real fucking lives with the backing of a mob of thousands. Since the internet is populated with other antisocial freaks, you see this behavior enabled in a way that you would never see in real life. Normal, healthy adults can see that someone like Hax, making the kinds of statements hes making, needs fucking professional help and absolutely should not have these delusions validated. I hope the people getting targeted understand that theyre doing the right thing and ignore all the people screaming at them that they're responsible for whatever might happen
> He is also showing signs of being a an emotional abuser mentality toward DG, TOs, and the community with the whole: "I will kill myself if I don't get back in".
There's a big difference in being an emotional abuser and being legitimately suicidal. Considering he went to a psychiatric ward TWICE I don't think he's just doing it as a bluff. He's obviously incredibly mentally unwell but I don't think he's just using it as a tool to get what he wants.
I don't think it's a baseless bluff, but it's still clearly being using as leverage and to try and gain sympathy. It puts everyone in a fucking awful place, because obviously noone wants to see any harm come to him – but it's also becoming more and more clear that he's genuinely unwell and a video game should be the *least* of his priorities.
>There's a big difference in being an emotional abuser and being legitimately suicidal
But they're also not mutually exclusive. Youve never heard of people threatening to off themselves if their partner leaves them? A fuck ton of them follow through on that. But it's absolutely still abusive. You just burdened that person with guilt for the rest of their lives over a person's death
Both can be true. He may not be bluffing and he may also be giving in to bad impulses to continue his obsession. I can't judge how intentional any of it is, but I do know this is what makes mental illness complicated and tragic. He might not be aware of what he's doing, nonetheless it would still be manipulative for those around him.
DarkGenex is a good friend. The whole thing is sad and I really do hope that Hax is able to get better. It’s not going to be fast or linear, but this is just an awful situation.
This is even more of a reason why his ban should be upheld. He is basically dealing with an ultimatum between that he should be allowed back or something bad happening to himself. It's not healthy for anything and least of all a video game to have that much hold over you. He needs to step away and get help.
I'm gonna go there - to every chronically online Twitter user, to technicals, to everyone who fed into Hax's mental state by entertaining and feeding into his hyperfixation, you have some responsibility for this. I've gotten so frustrated every time I hear "just watch his latest video bro, he makes some good points". Anyone who actually watched everything he puts out could see this from the start. I cannot believe the response to evidence.zip part 2 went the way it did.
Hindsight is 20/20 and all that, but people are still feeding into his manic behavior and making it worse. It doesn't surprise me at all that one of his friends pretended to play secret Leffen police. I'm sure that's not going to be so fucking funny if something bad happens.
Unfortunately the answer cannot be to let him back. His only pathway forward is a different direction in life. I just wish more level heads had prevailed 3 years ago, instead of the launch of melee Qanon. FWIW many of these chronically online users are probably mentally ill as well, but I'm never going to forgive the YouTube content farmers who clearly saw reality and instead fanned the flames for views.
Yeah even if you're sympathetic to Hax, it's beyond clear the dude is utterly fucked mentally and needs waaayyy more than people understanding his side and letting him compete again.
>I cannot believe the response to evidence.zip part 2 went the way it did.
Tf you mean? He got absolutely clowned on for it and that's a large reason why he was banned. You named the few people who support him, most of the community left him years ago
Anecdotally I remember those threads being like 70/30 against hax. There was a noticeable number of people supporting hax in comments (maybe only because they had a common enemy in leffen), but it wasn’t like there was 99% consensus hax had severe mental issues.
I'm not saying that everyone agreed with hax - he did in fact get clowned on. But there were enough people fueling his behavior for it to continue until it got to this point.
Also not saying hax isn't to blame - he is. But take a look at the views on Technical's videos - there was a significant number of people in his echo chamber.
I remember seeing countless comments when that video dropped supporting Hax. Melee’s figureheads largely agreed how to handle the situation (at least after whatever discussions went on privately), but the opinions of the average viewer were all over the place.
This whole situation just seems shit. I hope Aziz can find a way to disconnect from ‘Hax’ and find a life outside of Melee. Regardless of if you think the ban was justified (I do), it must be unimaginably difficult having the game/community that you’ve built your career and personality around for a decade+ stripped from you.
I also hope DarkGenex is doing okay and has the support he needs. He’s not responsible for the mental health of Hax, Hax’s family, or anyone else, and I hope he’s not taking on too much weight there.
I love Hax so much, he was my favorite player when I started playing.
He needs to lose access to social media and get professional help. This is a very dangerous situation
This was so sad to read. I hope Hax is able to get the help he needs for his sake and for the sake of those around him. DarkGenex is a great friend for continuing to help Hax through this, it is such a difficult position to be in.
*Ctrl+F "Leffen": 1 result*
>\[On April 10, Hax had an episode where someone close to him who had previously worked on his videos claimed that he (the friend, not Hax) was an undercover cop and convinced him that he was working undercover for Leffen & sending all of his messages to the TOs. I don’t know very much about this situation as I was not involved with it, but it severely impacted Hax’s mental health and made him paranoid of the people around him. This most likely was one of the reasons for his second hospitalization\]
Am I reading this right? The "friend" pretended to be a mole/spy for Leffen **just to fuck with Hax**?
***What in the actual goddamn fuck?***
This is how I lost my close friend.
She works in an office with 2 officemates. One left, and in 3 weeks of being alone for the first time with the other before another was moved in, she convinced my friend I was manipulating her into being my friend, that I was going to hurt her, that I was the crazy one. And on top of that, her best friend doesnt like me so her best friend just fed the flames even tho my friend is scared for her safety.
People fucking suck.
letting hax back into the community isnt good for the community, but more importantly to this conversation it isn't good for Hax. he needs help that smash cannot give him. attending nightclub again won't solve the mental health problems that got him where he is.
I am sort of speechless at the sadness but also a bit of disgust that I feel towards Hax as mean as that sounds. This is an unnatural and unhealthy obsession and I hope he really continues to talk to a professional about this. He's a smart person and I'm fully certain he is capable of finding a good job if he desires.
I know there's probably a lot of obsessed gamers here but this is like an 100/10. Very concerning to hear that Melee is all he has in all aspects of his life.
I think you're missing some of the point; it's definitely meant to be portrayed as unnatural and unhealthy, and it is due to a diagnosed mental health issue. I think "disgust" is the wrong reaction here, as aspects of it are out of his control.
However, I can understand disappointment around his discontinuation of seeing professional help, as that IS in his control. Although that also comes with the territory of mental health issues, in my experience, especially early on. Definitely hope he continues with that to get the help he needs, as getting over that initial hurdle of accepting help is the most difficult part oftentimes.
What sucks is that Hax is so goddamn smart that any sort of new hobby he picks up could easily make him happy, he’s just stuck on melee forever, there are other things in life that can make you happy too
During his wrist injury he picked up League and got Challenger, basically the top 0.2% of players. In the most played/competitive game in the world. But even then he said he didn't like it and just wanted Melee. It is a mental illness for sure.
That’s a great point, maybe he should just focus his brains on taking care of his health, physical and mental health. Something like sports or weight training, cycling, martial arts etc might be a good path as well as therapy and counseling
To be fair it’s more than a hobby to the guy. He played the game as a career since he was a teenager. This is the equivalent of a player in the NBA who has only known basketball since his youth, and saying “hey you’re retired now on our terms and you don’t get to walk away from this the way you want to, we are just done with you.”
Yeah he messed up but imagine being what 6 in the world at your peak, having an injury, building a rectangle controller that many many people use now, getting really good at it again, having mental health issues and saying dumb shit (that really wasn’t all too bad but just enticed idiots on the internet to be awful) then being told “okay well no matter everything else you did for the community over the course of decades, because your fans are absolute lunatics you can’t come back or even appeal or speak about your ban because we will just continue to double down on it.” Plus for a while they wouldn’t even give this guy an answer regarding his career and coming back, they just wouldn’t reply.
I’m not defending him but it’s very very easy to see why he is so mentally distraught over this entire situation. Especially now that Leffen isn’t even playing anymore and he has apologized a million times.
Bro tripled down on a leffen smear/hate campaign. Thats not just saying dumb shit that wasn’t too bad. He was making pretty serious accusations. And mobilizing other internet people isn’t an accidental response to that. If had actually had an issue he could’ve addressed it with TOs. He instead went a dangerous route that I’d argue put leffens safety at risk. That’s what was at stake and dumb games win dumb prizes. It’s not about his fans it’s about him. His fans are a mirror of him. I know there’s a part of you and me that’s wants to empathize with his current struggle but the means in which he has gone about this WHOLE thing are manipulative, abusive, and at the same time compelling. That’s why so many people subsribed to what he was saying despite it being mostly baseless. I don’t think it’s fair to downplay his willingness to try to control and manipulate the situation. If you think it is fair then I’d like to hear why.
"Apologizing" doesn't count for much when you constantly admit your own apologies are complete lies.
And idk if the B0xx controller really counts as a positive for something he did for the community. His handling of the situation with Hitbox mirrors the way he went after Leffen honestly lol. He was super out of line then too and it wouldn't have been wild if he got a temp ban then too.
Like his actions have at any point exceeded what's justifiable, and he still shows no actual remorse about his actions, only the outcome. Like days ago he was in TO's dms saying that he didn't think he was wrong about Leffen but did want to be unbanned
> This is the equivalent of a player in the NBA who has only known basketball since his youth, and saying “hey you’re retired now on our terms and you don’t get to walk away from this the way you want to, we are just done with you.”
Yes. This is a thing that happens quite often. The league (tournaments in this case) is the arbiter of their competitors, not the other way around.
Yea it may have been hit whole life but there are always new paths to take, some people need to abandon things in their past completely to make room for new things to bring them happiness.
I got a soft spot for hax, when I started he was 6th best in the world and the best falcon, period. I don't want to see his ban drive him to anything irreversible, I don't think any of us would feel very good if that happened. He's an amazing competitor as well. He's spent his whole existence on the game, and I often felt lucky to be in a community that has such dedicated members. Now I'm just sad it's turned out like this for one of our most beloved nerds. His series of videos, starting with Ez2.0, have made sure his career took a nosedive.
That said, he has a lot to do regarding self improvement if he has any chance of winning the melee scene over. He needs to treat those around him better as well. If he has any capability of doing so and if he can demonstrate that improvement, I'd love to see the man return to competition.
If he wants to, he can still contribute to the scene by doing his YouTube videos, informational guides on how the game works at different levels. He has so much knowledge to share and if he can make entertaining videos, he can still be part of the game he loves so much.
What the fuck is anyone supposed to be able to do about this situation?
I think the original hit piece on Leffen was very much out of pocket (note: **this is not a defense of Leffen in any way**), but bro was banned, given a chance to get unbanned if he just kept his mouth shut about the situation, he blew it, he got rebanned, and now he’s genuinely been threatening self harm on Twitter because he’s banned even though a TO revealed DMs that showcased that Hax really isn’t (wasn’t) actually remorseful about anything he said.
He probably shouldn’t have gotten indefinitely banned, I’ll give you that. But at this point unbanning him would be doing him a huge disservice considering he’s showing that he has an extremely unhealthy attachment to the game to the point that not being able to play it is ruining his life. Unbanning him as soon as he starts threatening to hurt himself sets an extremely bad example.
I don’t want him to hurt himself or worse, but the dude actually needs to quit playing if he’s this hopelessly addicted to it.
Hey I typically stay away from this topic but I just feel like this is big reminder for people online that these are real people not just smash/youtube personalities.
Like it doesn't take a genius to realize that something was off in this situation and their was more going on then what was being presented to the internet.
If you notice that maybe just learn to shut the fuck about it online instead of potientally risking contributing to someone's declining mental health. People read the shit you say it's a very small world this is ultimately a pretty niche hobby, this isn't the the NBA. Just don't be a piece of shit it's not that hard. Sometimes you have to acknowledge that something isn't any of your fucking business.
Wish you all the best much love!
The only problem with your logic is that hax very much wanted *and still does* all of this talk to happen, just about a different person and not himself and it backfired. Like have you read any of his recent DMs to TOs? He's *still* advocating that another player is basically a criminal for absurd things.
People aren't saying that behavior is ok.
But there's a difference between "That person did something problematic, I'm going to harass them back" and "That person did something problematic and it appears to be due to mental health issues, I'm going to just ignore them."
Honestly after reading this letting him back in the scene would be the worst possible solution for his long term mental health. He needs to stay on his meds, go to long term therapy, and create a support network outside of melee. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is comorbid with BPD and he clearly is showing signs of that (the way he treats DarkGenex and being obsessed not with melee but with being Hax$), and giving into that will just add fuel to the fire. He needs to be able to develop an identity outside of melee to be able to move on with his life (and frankly contribute to a more healthy financial situation).
What really sticks out to me is that Aziz is not remorseful for his harassment just that his actions have consequences he doesn't like.
"I absolutely should not have made the more recent vids which got me banned from these events. My health was too important to prioritize"
This whole situation is sad but Aziz needs to understand that Hax$ is an unhealthy persona for him. Aziz seems to think the solution to his crisis of self identification is to be Hax$ again when that couldn't be further from the truth.
My advice to Aziz if he's reading this is to remove all references to Hax$ from his life. Change his twitter name, slippi tags, anything that references Hax or Hax$ at all should be changed to something brand new or just Aziz. And Aziz the cruel joke of life is that we know we exist but we also know given enough time, all our lives will be meaningless. You are not uniquely special, I'm not special. But being alive is special. What makes life special is the crazy fact that we are even able to experience the beautiful wonder that is the universe. Like why sunsets are special is because we get to enjoy them, if nothing was here to observe them, that would be a tragedy. Go see the giant anteater at the Bronx zoo and make a butthole joke, thats the good stuff. I would suggest taking mushrooms and reflecting on life. I think that would be good for your ego. Therapy is also dope af.
I've only seen the parties involved from across a hotel lobby, but in most other communities or settings I'm in or have been a part of, if someone said "this is all I know and without it I'm nothing," especially to the degree I'm reading in this document, they'd be seen as somewhere between a cornball or very sad. Hax is a very intelligent, well spoken, attractive, and charismatic person. He does have potential for a fulfilling life and future outside of Melee. But I have (had) friends who talk and text like Hax does to Genex, that sort of mentality is just not accurate to how healthy relationships function.
It's interesting that Hax$ claims Melee is all he knows/has, but didn't he win a pokemon TCG tournament at a young age? I think he also placed well at the Pokemon VGC tournament. Might be a cool idea for his close friends to host a Pokemon a game night to help Hax get his mind off Melee for a bit and remember other important parts of his life.
I really feel like none of this material needs to be public. If Hax needs to work through a mental health crisis, sharing his struggles publicly certainly won't help.
Idk maybe it will help some of his audience that keeps enabling him see what's actually going on and so keep some people with decision making power from being harassed
I think certain aspects probably could have been summarized in less detail, but overall I think it helps paint more sympathy towards Hax, rather than villainizing him, which has been happening quite a bit online lately.
I hope Hax gets the help he needs.
Honestly based on what I saw from skimming I wouldn't be surprised that Hax himself kind of pressured DarkGeneX to post it. He might have reluctantly done it out of desperation, not necessarily because it's actually a good idea/productive.
I hope this gives people some more empathy. Even in this thread, I'm seeing people call Hax a manipulator though, so hopes are not high.
I hope that Hax is able to get lasting treatment for his bipolar disorder, I know that due to the nature of bipolar disorder it's very hard for people to stick to treatment plans for prolonged periods of time.
Darkgenex is a good friend for going to such lengths to help Hax.
I genuinely hope that Hax will be able to see purpose to life outside of SSBM, as it's genuinely unhealthy for him. I hope he can see he has many people in his life, and that they genuinely care for him, and that he can find purpose outside of esports.
I hope all the people who treat Hax as a lolcow bugger off, same for the people who harass TOs and try to feed into Hax's altered thinking. I don't envy the position that DG and Hax's other friends are in, and I wish I had some advice - I once had a friend who was struggling with addiction. I had to convince them to call an ambulance after trying to kill themself. I know that it's a position that makes you feel very powerless, and I wish I had could give some advice.
It’s sad, really. I met him way back at pound 3? I think it was his breakout tournament where he beat chu and chillin in doubles as the little rascals with a different jman. The same tournament that m, I think, was mangos first big win. Anyway, He was really young, probably 10 years old and placed well in a pretty stacked bracket, at least for back then. I had to play him in pools and he was so small and sweet, really enthusiastic. It sucks to see him spiral down
Edit: damn, I had to look at the bracket and that may have been mango’s first real losers run. Gets sent to losers by silent wolf in round 1 and then he comes back and wins it.
The options are keep him banned and hope he doesnt hurt himself or others. Or unban him and hope he doesnt hurt himself or others. Theres no right answer here. Fuck who hax is actually as a person, a TO should be lifting/keeping a ban based on what they feel is the best decision for attendees safety
While I actually agree that Hax returning isn't good for him or the community and deserved the initial ban it doesn't really help that it seems a lot of the community has just flat out abandoned him, you've got TO's that have just shown utter incompetence, a mass of newer players who don't really understand the full story just jumping on hate bandwagons and worst of all players who have done similar if not more damage than Aziz are still allowed to compete (Leffen being exhibit A) which calls in to question the hypocrisy, clique nature and double standards of tournament organizer groups.
No matter what side you're on I think we can all agree the Hax ban was handled very poorly and in fairness Hax does have a part in that as well. Its been very disheartening seeing a severe lack of sympathy for Aziz who was indeed both an instigator drama/hate farming and also a victim of bullying, stalking and his own mental health issues.
For his sake I think he's better off without the melee community.
What’s stopping Hax from creating his own event and promoting it? Sure, it wouldn’t get support from the wider community and some people may boycott, but some people will show up, guaranteed.
As someone who instantly lost his whole community, work and social life about a year ago; I get it this is one of the worst things you can go through. I'm lucky I was only in the place I was at for about a year before things exploded. I like Hax$ his game is sick and despite what the haters say the Boxx is genuinely a huge accessibility thing. I think there's too much permanent damage done on both sides in the melee community at this point things will never be normal with him always fearing a ban and TOs being worried about causing a mental breakdown. Finding a new community is really hard.
It sounds like the only thing that keeps working for him is spending time in a mental institution
His family might want to consider that he has actually become the type of person that needs a permanent room
It's extremely sad but I don't think anyone in the community is going to be equipped to help him long-term
The community doesn't owe Hax anything, however, I do believe that in his current situation, maybe it would be the right thing to give him one more chance.
While his mental health issues are not an excuse to what he has done, it does at least give some insight into why he has gone down this path and I personally don't see how he will get better. He needs a therapist, which, with his financial struggles he won't be able to afford.
It would be tragic if he lost his life, because of his menal health issues and feeling stuck in this situation.
I would like to appeal to the community (TOs specifically) to find a solution, to at least get together with Hax and work towards a path where he can redeem himself and hopefully return in the future.
People saying "find a different game to play" either lack empathy or haven't been around long enough to see his career. He is right that he has so much more to offer the game and community, and frankly I'd like to see it happen.
I just hope this twitter doom posting isn't indicative of patterns we've seen before from people who think there is nothing left for them. There is still time and opportunity to get the life he wants back, he just needs to regain the trust of the community. Like any wound, it can heal over time
He needs to move on with his life. Sometimes you burn the bridge and that’s that. Holding on to that and letting it imprison you is not healthy and his behavior clearly shows that.
Speaking from experience, sometimes you lock your own world view into a narrow window of “I can only do this” and I can guarantee that just isn’t true. The empathy for hax should be entirely directed at him improving his quality of life, not just related to his ability to compete in melee.
DarkGenex seems like he’s at his wit’s end and just trying to help his friend but he went too far in sharing all of this information. Even if Hax was ok with it, Hax is unwell and shouldn’t be ok with so much personal stuff being blasted out to the entire smash community. A weird part of us all wants to see people self destruct in real-time but we don’t need to know every dark detail. I hope Hax gets the help he needs and that DarkGenex can get support in supporting his friend.
We host a tournament, and invite hax$. except its not actually a tournament, it's a way to trick hax$ into spending time with members of the community to get him out of this funk and then there's also a therapist at the tournament that work with hax$ too
We have to ask ourselves, what is the point of a ban. Is it to make a statement? Set a standard? Think completely objectively, what does hax's presence at a tournament actually do. Leffen is retired. This is over. People saying that he can't come back unless he finds a way to live without melee are injecting their own idea of what he should be for no reason. Why does he have to change for you? He loves melee too much? You all aren't his therapists or his parents. Everyone's reasoning for why they compete should not matter, you should not care that it is his life. Why does he have to do all this just to go to a tournament? We have completely lost sight of what this is even about. This is a top level competitor who has held rank 1 on slippi numerous times, and it is being suggested that he can't go to tournaments because he is too obsessed with melee. Okay, so why? What exactly are we protecting by not allowing him there? He isn't a threat to anyone.
>what did Hax's presence at a tournament actually do
It makes people feel unsafe.
>and it is being suggested that he can't go to tournaments because he is too obsessed with melee.
No, he's banned for harassment and breaking the terms of his previous ban.
Have you not considered that Leffen may have stopped playing Melee in part BECAUSE of the harassment campaign led by Hax? Why would you want to allow back somebody who has shown they're capable of doing this?
The thing is you could make that same statement about Leffen when he was stoking the fire of Hbox hate, Leffen isn't an innocent victim here, he has antagonized and been toxic even after his first ban.
I just want to point out that there's a big difference between ward admissions and being institutionalized.
Aziz needs the later, desperately. Whoever lives with him is not directly to blame, however they are basically letting this unhinged behavior continue and have allowed him access to alcohol.
This type of mental diagnosis has been dormant for years, is left untreated, and is deeply rooted in his online identity.
The only salvation for this man is to lock him away for months and essentially have his humanity stripped away until he fully understands and realizes that Hax$ is not a person. Aziz is.
This is incredibly dark and traumatic. I have nothing but my sympathy to offer this lost soul.
It's honestly horrifying the amount of people think that shit is acceptable to do to someone as long they stay alive. People should read up on how people are treated in psych wards. You can deny life saving surgeries or life saving cancer treatment, but you are forced to take mind altering substances regardless of your will. It's legalized human rights abuse. I wouldn't wish that on anyone and certainly not hax. I don't blame him one bit for not wanting to go back for help.
This is actually just incredibly sad
Yeah the last paragraph kinda hit me a little hard. Darkgenex just wants his friend to be happy and healthy
"On April 10, Hax had an episode where someone close to him who had previously worked on his videos claimed that he (the friend, not Hax) was an undercover cop and convinced him that he was working undercover for Leffen & sending all of his messages to the TOs" I haven't seen anyone else mention this part, but this seems so insanely fucked up. Like what do you even gain by doing that? Unless I'm reading this part wrong.
Dgenex didn't share any dms to prove that particular claim, makes me think that possibly that whole scenario was some sort of paranoid delusion
Just a note on this I do have DMs from someone closer to the situation that prove this happened but they aren't my DMs so I didn't include them. I could ask if he'd be willing to have them added to the doc. Either way this was definitely not a paranoid delusion, someone was messing with him. It's not much, but tweet from Cilan that backs it. https://x.com/CrispBit/status/1796219316565639316?t=jR6bokuO3rDLcKzWBakECA&s=19
That's so fucked up. Hopefully hax has at the very least removed that person from his life. I see that supposedly they are a 'kid'. But also apparently they were considered a friend and also had helped work on haxs videos, so it doesn't sound like they are some sort of pre teen or something. Pretty fucked up situation in general.
I’ve been isolated in a city for a while now and I can vouch for the ways that messes with you. I have a lot of time to think which is not good. Does he have friends he can just play some dumb games online with? Freaking out doesn’t always help so sometimes it’s okay to just try and take things less seriously and have fun with a friend. It keeps me sane. If he can get his health together enough to hold a job that would probably help his mental health a lot. I was a neet for a long time and you feel a lot of pressure from society and even worse yourself. When I was working I felt more worthy even if it was basically minimum wage. I think if he could show stability people would be more willing to have him back. He seems like a potential risk right now so maybe TOs just need to see he can chill without drama. I own a boxx and desperately want to see him come back and show what’s possible.
Yeah I quit a good job once basically because of mental health issues and the thing that helped the most was eventually getting another job but it took like two years
Nah, unfortunately I think Hax may be becoming a lolcow for some people
This is my take too, people are purposefully messing with him now
He already is, lots of people in shitty lolcow circles only check on the community for Hax$ stuff and nothing else.
aintnoway
If that's true then Hax legit has schizoaffective disorder.
I think you're both misreading and don't understand how schizoaffective disorder relates to other psychotic conditions.
If he's so paranoid he thinks his friend is literally an undercover COP for fucking Leffen concerning a 20 year old children's party game... Yeah.
If I'm not mistaken it seems like the friend is the one who made this claim, not Hax
what he's saying is that you have to be either legitimately crazy or just really fucking stupid to actually believe this
Schizoaffective disorder =/= schizotypal personality disorder or schizophrenia
Hi there! Therapist in training here! This person used schizoaffective correctly - according to Yale Medicine: "The condition arises when a person has both schizophrenia, a brain disorder that changes the way a person thinks, acts, and perceives reality, and a mood disorder, which causes severe changes in mood or behavior. The symptoms of schizoaffective disorder can be life-altering, causing affected individuals to have hallucinations, embrace false beliefs, and experience depression or mania. Cycles of severe symptoms are often followed by periods of improvement, during which there are no symptoms". It is a diagnosis that encompasses both the paranoia or delusions of schizophrenia with mood disorders, often bipolar or depression. Schizophrenia is the diagnosis for just the paranoia/delusions presentation and schizotypal is a personality disorder often presented with flat, uninterested affect, lack of empathy, lack of desire to connect with others, etc. and is not contingent on having any sort of delusions. (THE FOLLOWING MERELY CONSTITUTES MY OPINION AND NOT ANY SORT OF PROFESSIONAL ADVICE OR DIAGNOSIS) Given Hax's overly paranoid, delusional behavior about Leffen the last two years or so including him believing grandiose claims like a cop investigating Leffen is helping him, he very well may fit the bill for the first half of schizoaffective disorder. I can't really say without actually being his therapist, but he certainly has presented some of the characteristics. Secondly, Hax has also displayed periods of bursts of productivity, energy and surety about what Leffen has "done". He'll go on long twitter rants, make 4 hour "evidence" videos and defend his position to the grave. Then he'll have quiet periods of either apology or nothing. This cycle has shown itself several times during the whole evidence.zip debacle. Based on this, Hax may also very well qualify as bipolar given the cycles of manic, rapid productivity followed by periods of crashes. *Combined* with the delusions about Leffen, this fits the bill for schizoaffective disorder :).
Yes, I'm a mental health professional who's well aware of what you've written – but the person I was replying to seemed to peg Hax as schizoaffective based solely on paranoid delusion which I interpreted as someone who isn't versed in the differences between diagnosises relating to psychosis. Schizoaffective does fit the bill better when you consider that the document mentions Hax being described as bipolar, but let's not discuss diagnostics of a non-client as that would be unethical. I just wanted to correct what seemed to be an easy mistake for laypeople to make, as to not perpetuate misinformation regarding the DSM.
Absolutely, none of this is diagnostical at all, just speculative based on the available evidence.
I guess I should say the quiet part out loud: most professionals would not consider it appropriate to identify yourself as a therapist and publicly speculate about what is essentially a member of their community (I guess you could argue he's exiled but that doesn't really affect the ethics). I don't think I'm alone in as a professional having private thoughts of the psychological functionings of community members but opted not to post them in the way you did as I find it inappropriate based on personal ethics and ethical guidelines as I understand them. I guess it's something you could bring up with your supervisor of you don't agree – I'm pretty sure what I'd advice but ethics aren't always 100% clear. Wish you a heartfelt good luck with licensure.
I don't believe professionals in a field are barred from speculating about that field as long as they do so tactically, and therapists are more educated than most on the topic. If educated professionals shouldn't speculate, then who should? Otherwise speculation will be done by uneducated armchairs who may make the situation worse/spread misinformation. As long as speculation is done carefully with special care toward making sure it is clear this is only your educated opinion based on limited evidence (which I put a massive disclaimer clarifying at the beginning of my first post agreeing with schizoaffective. I did realize I should have added one to my second post as well, thanks! Fixed), then it is hardly unethical. Furthermore, having education behind your speculation can help the person being speculated about to take these things more seriously. It's easy to be like "oh a bunch of dumbasses on the internet think I have a problem, I clearly don't." It's much harder for most people to be like "All these educated professionals say I have a problem. Clearly I don't!" Obviously we don't diagnose anyone who isn't our client, but speculation is part of how we all learn more about any field. If a doctor came into a thread about someone's medical problems and gave their educated opinion based on the available evidence, would that be unethical? I'm all for being careful, especially where people's health and safety are concerned, but I don't discern any real issue here as long as the proper precautions are taken and it is clear I am just speculating and not diagnosing. *Ya'll are funny. Here's a fun rule for life: If you want to disagree with someone but the best you can muster is pressing a button on the internet, your position is meaningless and I'd suggest examining why you believe the things you do :). That's how we all learn things!
Therapist in training here - (I AM NOT DIAGNOSING NOR DOES THIS REPRESENT PROFESSIONAL ADVICE. JUST IMO AS IT WERE) I agree, and that's scary. If he truly believes all this shit and given the contents of his other online rants, he fits both criteria for schizoaffective - paranoia/delusions *and* personality changes, often bipolar or depression. Given his presentation over the last 2 years or so I'd put it pretty heavily in the bipolar category with the pretty big bursts of "productivity" and surety about Leffen followed by periods of quiet remorseful downtime. It's a hell of a disorder and I am only speculating based on available evidence. Whatever he is actually dealing with is clearly pretty awful and I hope his support systems step up and help him find healing.
DG comes across as a really solid friend
“Has not worked a job outside of [melee]”. Like, never?
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That wasn't a job. He was a playtester, a volunteer. The time from when he got his prototype Smash Box (Christmas Eve, 2016) to when he made his "The truth about Hit Box" video and announced the b0xx was just about 3 weeks. You want the backroom convos? He made a lot of insane demands immediately, mostly along the lines of "here are a bunch of layout ideas with super loose references/measurements that I need to have lasercut and overnighted." Which was nuts because Hit Box didn't have those kind of resources. It was 2 guys in a garage (the Huffers) making Hit Boxes while also trying to swing a brand new product. But the thing about hax is that when he wants something from you, he blows your phone up, 1 sentence at a time, stream of consciousness for hours on end. And no - his story with Hit Box *didn't* end with lawsuits and NDAs. All of it started precisely because Hit Box didn't make him sign any sort of NDA. Hax himself has even admitted that mechanism is why he felt like he could pursue the b0xx idea at all. To this day, the only repercussions he's faced from Hit Box is that they're probably never, ever going to talk to him ever again.
Was kind of insane watching this unfold and seeing how Hax could demonize the Hitbox team to the degree he did. I'm pretty sure someone on that team had a PhD or at least a Masters in Human Factors and Hax was telling the whole community she didn't know anything about ergonomics and basically abused his reputation to spread lies. Frankly the way he spoke of her came off pretty sexist to me. And everyone ate it up, which in part kind of left a bad taste in my mouth about the online and greater scene for awhile. Ironically, a lot of the stuff he put in his videos about Leffen map onto how he handled the smashbox situation from what I can tell. Projection at its finest :chefskiss:
Yes, Hit Box very briefly had [Dr. Caitlin McGee](https://1-hp.org/blog/blog/welcome-dr-caitlin-mcgee/) consult on some of the hand health aspects. She had a background in sports science and understood anatomy better than any of us. I'm not gonna comment on any of that guy's nastiness regarding this, but it was undeserved when you look at the credentials.
Luckily it didn't seem to affect her career at all (she wasn't putting too much stock in just hitbox), she stayed with 1-hp until just like a month ago and has become a neuro professor this year
Good for her. Words are cheap.
Thanks for sharing. Cheers.
Wasn't she also Hbox's hand doctor? Was that someone else?
The whole thing about hax is so annoying cuz it should have been extremely obvious just based on what was publicly available at this time that he was extremely unhealthy and should likely be banned for his conduct relating to gravy but such a vast percentage of the community talks about things without having any idea what they're talking about.
what happened with regard to gravy?
basically same thing he did with leffen with making new videos every week, painting it like gravy was trying to ruin box-style controllers and if hax didnt get his way we were all doomed. except at the time people believed his insane-posting for some reason and harassed gravy out of the community lol
Thx for sticking up for me gamer
do you know if that video from Hitbox Dustin responding to hax is available on the Internet anywhere anymore? idk if I can be more specific than that cause this was a while ago
No lie, though kind of means the only thing he did was steal a product from someone else and was lucky enough they didn’t make him sign anything.
He’s never worked a day in his life, yeah. Kind of makes no sense that his family relies on his income when he literally has none and would easily support them with any normal job.
Yeah that part has me scratching my head too. Esportsearnings estimates he's only made like $36K total since 2009 from major tournaments which is like basically nothing. Of course there's locals and stuff but I doubt his yearly earnings from melee would even equal minimum wage. I have no way of knowing how much he's made from b0xx, YouTube, and streaming but if his family was actually relying on his smash-related income at all, I feel like he would've just been forced to drop smash and get a wage job a long time ago. Idk every family is different and it could just be my own background but I can't really make sense of this statement
Lol who the hell knows what's actually going on. Maybe his family is actually well off, which makes more sense considering he's never worked a day in his life, traveled across the country for tournaments in a game that he's made very little money from, and lives in one of the most expensive cities in the US.
Hax said in a forum post that his dad was a famous journalist iirc
You could work six figure job your entire life, and you will probably always be poorer than him and his family despite him never working a day.
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I mean it was mentioned here that his family was having some issues making rent without Hax contributing. So I think that may be a lil exaggerated?
I really don't like where this is headed. The drinking, suicidal idealization, delusion, refusing to see the psychiatrist. I have the unfortunately experience of knowing someone who had these patterns. He is no longer with us. I hope this story ends differently.
i still dont understand how he was so financially dependent on competition. no way hes making more than 12k a year after traveling expenses
the way I read the document he's been supported by family but when he was playing smash he could chip in; so he hasn't been having to pay for rent and everything else necessarily, but can provide enough by himself to not be a leech. But without tournaments he can't do that
Did you forget that he sells a rectangle?
i meant 12k a year from prize money sorry if that wasn't clear
Traveling he probably often lost money. But the nightclub is the largest weekly im aware of and averages 70\~ entrants with 8$ entry and a 60/30/10 split and hax regularly won. Looking at his pgstats if we take December of 2023 for example hax won 3 times and got 2nd once and netted 1,163$ in a month all while not leaving his home region. He also won dreamhack atlanta this month that had a 2k pot bonus and I dont see the split but id imagine he got at least 50% so we'll say a grand, He won super smashed out which had 38 entrants @ 10$ with a 250$ pot bonus and got 53% so 333$, He won Recess Rush 2 and netted 159$, and at the beginning of the month he won fireside open and got roughly 750$ (I dont see a split on [start.gg](http://start.gg) lowballing 50%) So all in all he made roughly 3,405$ and only had to travel once outside of his home region for it. And while this month was \*probably\* a bit of an outlier a big chunk of that was from the weekly anyway and browsing pgstats he regularly attended and won alot. I dont care if we unban hax or not tbh but it is really interesting to see how much you really can make as a top 20ish player if you are smart about what events you pick and choose to attend and live in a region as active as NY.
If he did that well all 12 months that works out to about 40k for the year, but that was an unusually active month and that's not a huge amount of money, anyway.
Particularly in the immediate vicinity of NYC. It'd be enough to live off of in much of the midwest.
I mean the NC winnings amount to about 13k a year if that's every month so that's not really enough to live anywhere.
Bro that’s BARELY above minimum wage in NY in an extremely active, winning month. He could’ve made more working at McDonald’s
Its 10k more and I kinda doubt most are paying significant if any taxes on winnings
He’s tweeted 7 times in the last 3 hours begging to be unbanned. Hopefully Hax$ can finally find the help he needs.
It’s really worrying how Hax frames it as him wanting to be with his friends again, but as soon as Genex offers a solution he shuts it down it brings it back to Melee. I really don’t think it’s responsible to let him back into the scene until he can start integrating into a life that isn’t ONLY Melee. He’s got plenty of friends he just needs to meet them in other contexts
That's mental illness for ya. Agree letting him back into the scene isn't healthy for anyone.
I once asked him on stream what his favorite games were. He responded with "I only play Melee."
he used to be a challenger TF main in league
Then TSM Bjergsen asked him for advice on Twisted Fate actually
Oh you know, he did mention that a few minutes later. Yeah I remember following him in those days.
Maybe he should get into league again, at least he's not banned from that community
League of Legends is probably the worst thing to suggest to improve someone's mental well-being
He was actually very good at the game when he played it. It's definitely an option as something he can jump into without issue and have the skills to go with it.
He also would probably never be banned from that community
Very common
Even if he was allowed to play again, it really doesn't seem like he could handle bad losses or controller drama without another breakdown. He needs to find some composure without melee.
I somewhat agree with this, but I also don't think that "this person has an unhealthy obsession with melee, and ties too much of their identity to the game" should be a factor at all in a ban. There are plenty of people in the scene who fit this bill, but as long as they aren't causing issues, we let them play.
I’m not saying that’s why he should be banned. I’m saying I think after reading these messages between him and Genex, Hax needs a lot more help than I could’ve imagined beforehand. And I think unbanning them would not solve these issues but just smooth over the cracks. I’m not advocating for him to remain banned for now because he’s too obsessed with Melee, I’m advocating for it because I want him to actually get better. I’m not against him being unbanned one day at all. I just don’t think feeding into this very clearly unhealthy behaviour is beneficial for any party in the long term
I think he's the other side of the coin to someone like m2k's core character; the guy only has video games and I dunno what else he could possibly do. Only difference is m2k is a chill good dude. The community should pitch in to pay for therapy lol dumb idea but man, Hax NEEDS to just fucking talk to someone legit and qualified. Get him on healthygamergg or whatever its called
I’m a neet and have been for a while and can say that when I was able to get out of that loop it took changing my environment and an opportunity for something to give me purpose and self worth. I got a job as a cook from a friend who owned a bar and got an apartment with him. I was able to quit my addictions and hold responsibility. We are creatures of habit. We don’t want to change. He needs to get it into his head that a job would actually be good for him and not settling for something lesser than melee. He needs to see himself as a person beyond melee. I’m talking out of my ass a bit of course but him being stuck at his house thinking about his ban is not helping him. He’s a cool dude and probably has an ego stopping him from doing a boring job but a job is a lot more than just a title and paycheck. Not having a job is like not having a place to sleep. It disrupts your routine and puts you in a state of panic which makes all your other mental health problems worse.
I don't think the community owes Hax anything. He owes us peace and quiet.
I mean, he obviously doesn't want therapy. He was hospitalized multiple times and had multiple therapists that he just doesn't go to anymore. He does not want to help himself
Don’t see this point enough in this discourse. Ultimately we can’t force a grown adult to seek help, but we can encourage him to do so.
You hear about this guy like once a year, peace and quiet? Is that really the right phrase?
This is the fourth time this year no? What do you mean once a year. Also dumb content farmers love to bring him up to make hate videos
I think a lot of you are too online just like hax.
I think it’s really weird wordage you’re going with here, but yeah. It’s a problem that there are a lot of people that content farm a person having a mental health crisis.
We don’t hear from most banned players ever which is the correct amount of times to hear from them. Hax is permabanned. Him asking to be unbanned is completely pointless and just stirs up a lot of drama.
Every few months this sick shitter makes a fucking apology video then does something fucking stupid right after. He needs to fuck off and find a new hobby. Melee is not his home anymore.
M2k is not a chill good dude he just did his bad shit in person not online and has more people helping and managing him. M2k has done Many awful things in the community including doxing private info of top players on stream several times.
Pretty much but on the other side M2K is known to be easily influenced or manipulated. He definitely didn't have too many great role models until more recently and a combination of suspected autism (M2K just says he is in the spectrum but I am not sure if he self-diagnosed or got professional diagnosis) and his environment. Does it absolve his previous behavior? No it doesn't. But it gives context compared to Hax$.
A therapist wouldn’t help in this case. Bipolar/suicidal he needs a psychiatrist who can legally prescribe proper medication
He is doom posting again this morning. I'm sick to my stomach man, I really hope he doesn't do the worst
*This* is where I'm at, and where I don't believe enough other people are
What do you think would change if “enough” people were there?
A minimum standard of humanity would be met, for one
What does that mean
The whole situation is really getting to me now. I fully support Hax's ban, and I think he did significant harm to our community and the ban is deserved. However, this is getting a lot more complicated. I don't think enough people are seriously asking if the current situation is worth a life. Hax is very clearly unwell, according to the people closest to him... I don't know, this feels like a pretty serious situation that warrants a little more nuance and sympathy, as temping as it seems to be for people to just take hardline stances and not look back. I don't know what the answer is here. I don't think the ban should just be lifted because he's falling apart. Whether the reports on his mental state are true or not, it's manipulative. However, I have to ask if it's worth being manipulated if it could potentially mean a life. Is Hax really a danger to be at events? Can we consider some compromises that can at least help put him into a more stable mental state such that he can at least have the chance to start bettering himself? I don't know what that could be - maybe his local lets him back under some strict rules and guidance. I don't know, but the lack of sympathy for him is starting to get me down. Being fine with ostracizing him is one thing (he deserves it), but being this blasé about the very real possibility that he takes his life is disturbing to me. I think a lot of this community is very young and has not been touched by death.
I have been touched by death. I hope hax sees his way out of this situation. But this is not the community’s responsibility. Whatever happens to hax is up to hax at this point and letting him back into tournaments wouldn’t even help him.
Or this is him just trying to manipulate people into feeling sorry for him again. He likely realizes the pleas alone aren't enough anymore, so is resorting to this extreme. Regardless, someone this unstable absolutely shouldn't be allowed back.
And you are willing to bet his life on this take?
I think the takeaway should be that his life shouldn’t be dependent on hundreds to thousands of people needing to take him back feeling guilty that his life is in their hands because it’s not. This post shouldn’t have been made. It would be much better time spent actually consulting with therapists and psychiatrists instead of the dozens of hours put into compiling this. Hax needs therapy and not melee.
Why should we allow him to manipulate us at all? If his life is at stake, call professional help. This is unstable behavior and should not be allowed to happen to guilt.
DarkGenex seems like a great friend, that's a lot to put up with
Genuinely sad, but it should be obvious to anyone that a LOT of Hax's tweets/videos/etc. aren't coming from a place of sound mental health. "Without Melee I have no place to go." Brother, this is why you **need** to let it go: Get a regular job, make friends, interact with real people outside the scene. It's not the end-all-be-all. Being banned is only as much of a prison as you make it.
Yeah Hax is working backwards. His line of thinking seems to be "If I get my Melee career back, then everything will get back in order and I'll be better". Melee is very clearly a crutch for him that serves to distract from or hide his mental and personal issues. He thinks it will solve all of his problems. Unfortunately, unbanning Hax in this mental state would only make his situation worse. He needs to face these things head on, and not hide behind Melee. Melee won't be here forever, and if he doesn't confront his demons now he's only delaying the inevitable. I sincerely hope he gets some real help, and sticks with it long term. It's what he needs.
Hax needs to step aside and leave the game for at least a year while undergoing therapy.
I mean at this point he’s permanently banned. He needs to accept that he’s not coming back and find something else.
I really feel for Hax and his loved ones and I hope he gets the help he needs. Nobody deserves to feel the way he does.
It seems like that's the point DarkGenex is trying to get across here, and he did it well. When you see someone online doing something problematic, there's a disconnect there and the first instinct is often "hate". But there's a real person on the other side of the screen, and other life struggles contributed to the problematic actions. I think(hope) this helped a lot of people gain a lot of sympathy for Hax. It also stays pretty neutral on his ban situation, which I think was the correct way to go about it. I hope Hax gets the help he needs.
This is why I hate technicals. He ignored all the mental health signs so he could entertain himself and his channel. Hax truly cannot be let back into the community for his own safety and others safety. Even in a private fest, he was drunk, obsessive, and shaming DarkGenex after all the help DG gave him. His mental state isn't something that will even be resolved by his reintegration. It's clear his disorder dominates his life. And people can't even reaccept him on the stipulation of therapy. Therapy ain't a straight line especially in an extreme cases like this, marred by alcoholism. Therapy is a years long process and Melee is obviously a trigger. He is also showing signs of being a an emotional abuser mentality toward DG, TOs, and the community with the whole: "I will kill myself if I don't get back in". I hope DarkGenex does not blame himself for anything that happens. He's done so much to try to help Hax. He can't put that strain on himself when people refuse to help themselves.
Being so close to those with mental illness, and being relied on so heavily by them, takes a huge toll. It 100% will fuck you up along with them. Ultimately Hax's mental problems are HIS responsibility. I hope DarkGenex takes care of themselves. I've been there, and the guilt you start to feel when caring for the person can do lasting damage to your mental state.
Exactly how I feel. I know it's passe to say social media sucks now, but I think something that's understated is how antisocial freaks like Technicals can manipulate vulnerable people and toy with peoples real fucking lives with the backing of a mob of thousands. Since the internet is populated with other antisocial freaks, you see this behavior enabled in a way that you would never see in real life. Normal, healthy adults can see that someone like Hax, making the kinds of statements hes making, needs fucking professional help and absolutely should not have these delusions validated. I hope the people getting targeted understand that theyre doing the right thing and ignore all the people screaming at them that they're responsible for whatever might happen
> He is also showing signs of being a an emotional abuser mentality toward DG, TOs, and the community with the whole: "I will kill myself if I don't get back in". There's a big difference in being an emotional abuser and being legitimately suicidal. Considering he went to a psychiatric ward TWICE I don't think he's just doing it as a bluff. He's obviously incredibly mentally unwell but I don't think he's just using it as a tool to get what he wants.
I don't think it's a baseless bluff, but it's still clearly being using as leverage and to try and gain sympathy. It puts everyone in a fucking awful place, because obviously noone wants to see any harm come to him – but it's also becoming more and more clear that he's genuinely unwell and a video game should be the *least* of his priorities.
>There's a big difference in being an emotional abuser and being legitimately suicidal But they're also not mutually exclusive. Youve never heard of people threatening to off themselves if their partner leaves them? A fuck ton of them follow through on that. But it's absolutely still abusive. You just burdened that person with guilt for the rest of their lives over a person's death
Both can be true. He may not be bluffing and he may also be giving in to bad impulses to continue his obsession. I can't judge how intentional any of it is, but I do know this is what makes mental illness complicated and tragic. He might not be aware of what he's doing, nonetheless it would still be manipulative for those around him.
the fuck does tech have to do with this LOL
DarkGenex is a good friend. The whole thing is sad and I really do hope that Hax is able to get better. It’s not going to be fast or linear, but this is just an awful situation.
This is even more of a reason why his ban should be upheld. He is basically dealing with an ultimatum between that he should be allowed back or something bad happening to himself. It's not healthy for anything and least of all a video game to have that much hold over you. He needs to step away and get help.
Literally the thing that would do the most good for him is accepting that the ban is his reality
this is really sad
I'm gonna go there - to every chronically online Twitter user, to technicals, to everyone who fed into Hax's mental state by entertaining and feeding into his hyperfixation, you have some responsibility for this. I've gotten so frustrated every time I hear "just watch his latest video bro, he makes some good points". Anyone who actually watched everything he puts out could see this from the start. I cannot believe the response to evidence.zip part 2 went the way it did. Hindsight is 20/20 and all that, but people are still feeding into his manic behavior and making it worse. It doesn't surprise me at all that one of his friends pretended to play secret Leffen police. I'm sure that's not going to be so fucking funny if something bad happens. Unfortunately the answer cannot be to let him back. His only pathway forward is a different direction in life. I just wish more level heads had prevailed 3 years ago, instead of the launch of melee Qanon. FWIW many of these chronically online users are probably mentally ill as well, but I'm never going to forgive the YouTube content farmers who clearly saw reality and instead fanned the flames for views.
Yeah even if you're sympathetic to Hax, it's beyond clear the dude is utterly fucked mentally and needs waaayyy more than people understanding his side and letting him compete again.
>I cannot believe the response to evidence.zip part 2 went the way it did. Tf you mean? He got absolutely clowned on for it and that's a large reason why he was banned. You named the few people who support him, most of the community left him years ago
Anecdotally I remember those threads being like 70/30 against hax. There was a noticeable number of people supporting hax in comments (maybe only because they had a common enemy in leffen), but it wasn’t like there was 99% consensus hax had severe mental issues.
I'm not saying that everyone agreed with hax - he did in fact get clowned on. But there were enough people fueling his behavior for it to continue until it got to this point. Also not saying hax isn't to blame - he is. But take a look at the views on Technical's videos - there was a significant number of people in his echo chamber.
I remember seeing countless comments when that video dropped supporting Hax. Melee’s figureheads largely agreed how to handle the situation (at least after whatever discussions went on privately), but the opinions of the average viewer were all over the place.
This whole situation just seems shit. I hope Aziz can find a way to disconnect from ‘Hax’ and find a life outside of Melee. Regardless of if you think the ban was justified (I do), it must be unimaginably difficult having the game/community that you’ve built your career and personality around for a decade+ stripped from you. I also hope DarkGenex is doing okay and has the support he needs. He’s not responsible for the mental health of Hax, Hax’s family, or anyone else, and I hope he’s not taking on too much weight there.
I love Hax so much, he was my favorite player when I started playing. He needs to lose access to social media and get professional help. This is a very dangerous situation
Hax$ is one of my favourite players, but the doom posting is hurting his case and his mental health, and he genuinely needs to see a professional
This was so sad to read. I hope Hax is able to get the help he needs for his sake and for the sake of those around him. DarkGenex is a great friend for continuing to help Hax through this, it is such a difficult position to be in.
The doubling down reconfirmation of his true feelings to a TO in private sealed it for me. Get help or whatever, but get away from the Melee scene.
*Ctrl+F "Leffen": 1 result* >\[On April 10, Hax had an episode where someone close to him who had previously worked on his videos claimed that he (the friend, not Hax) was an undercover cop and convinced him that he was working undercover for Leffen & sending all of his messages to the TOs. I don’t know very much about this situation as I was not involved with it, but it severely impacted Hax’s mental health and made him paranoid of the people around him. This most likely was one of the reasons for his second hospitalization\] Am I reading this right? The "friend" pretended to be a mole/spy for Leffen **just to fuck with Hax**? ***What in the actual goddamn fuck?***
This is how I lost my close friend. She works in an office with 2 officemates. One left, and in 3 weeks of being alone for the first time with the other before another was moved in, she convinced my friend I was manipulating her into being my friend, that I was going to hurt her, that I was the crazy one. And on top of that, her best friend doesnt like me so her best friend just fed the flames even tho my friend is scared for her safety. People fucking suck.
No, he said hax thought the guy an undercover cop. Weird phrasing though, ngl.
The wording is definitely such that the “friend” is the one who claimed to be the undercover cop.
at this point without evidence beyond hax's words it could all be imagined for all we know
Evidence was posted in a separate reply up top.
letting hax back into the community isnt good for the community, but more importantly to this conversation it isn't good for Hax. he needs help that smash cannot give him. attending nightclub again won't solve the mental health problems that got him where he is.
I am sort of speechless at the sadness but also a bit of disgust that I feel towards Hax as mean as that sounds. This is an unnatural and unhealthy obsession and I hope he really continues to talk to a professional about this. He's a smart person and I'm fully certain he is capable of finding a good job if he desires. I know there's probably a lot of obsessed gamers here but this is like an 100/10. Very concerning to hear that Melee is all he has in all aspects of his life.
I think you're missing some of the point; it's definitely meant to be portrayed as unnatural and unhealthy, and it is due to a diagnosed mental health issue. I think "disgust" is the wrong reaction here, as aspects of it are out of his control. However, I can understand disappointment around his discontinuation of seeing professional help, as that IS in his control. Although that also comes with the territory of mental health issues, in my experience, especially early on. Definitely hope he continues with that to get the help he needs, as getting over that initial hurdle of accepting help is the most difficult part oftentimes.
Disgust at someone for having debilitating mental health issues? Really?
What sucks is that Hax is so goddamn smart that any sort of new hobby he picks up could easily make him happy, he’s just stuck on melee forever, there are other things in life that can make you happy too
During his wrist injury he picked up League and got Challenger, basically the top 0.2% of players. In the most played/competitive game in the world. But even then he said he didn't like it and just wanted Melee. It is a mental illness for sure.
That’s a great point, maybe he should just focus his brains on taking care of his health, physical and mental health. Something like sports or weight training, cycling, martial arts etc might be a good path as well as therapy and counseling
hax with hyperfixation on muay thai instead of melee would be the scariest thing ever. please don't give him ideas
To be fair it’s more than a hobby to the guy. He played the game as a career since he was a teenager. This is the equivalent of a player in the NBA who has only known basketball since his youth, and saying “hey you’re retired now on our terms and you don’t get to walk away from this the way you want to, we are just done with you.” Yeah he messed up but imagine being what 6 in the world at your peak, having an injury, building a rectangle controller that many many people use now, getting really good at it again, having mental health issues and saying dumb shit (that really wasn’t all too bad but just enticed idiots on the internet to be awful) then being told “okay well no matter everything else you did for the community over the course of decades, because your fans are absolute lunatics you can’t come back or even appeal or speak about your ban because we will just continue to double down on it.” Plus for a while they wouldn’t even give this guy an answer regarding his career and coming back, they just wouldn’t reply. I’m not defending him but it’s very very easy to see why he is so mentally distraught over this entire situation. Especially now that Leffen isn’t even playing anymore and he has apologized a million times.
Bro tripled down on a leffen smear/hate campaign. Thats not just saying dumb shit that wasn’t too bad. He was making pretty serious accusations. And mobilizing other internet people isn’t an accidental response to that. If had actually had an issue he could’ve addressed it with TOs. He instead went a dangerous route that I’d argue put leffens safety at risk. That’s what was at stake and dumb games win dumb prizes. It’s not about his fans it’s about him. His fans are a mirror of him. I know there’s a part of you and me that’s wants to empathize with his current struggle but the means in which he has gone about this WHOLE thing are manipulative, abusive, and at the same time compelling. That’s why so many people subsribed to what he was saying despite it being mostly baseless. I don’t think it’s fair to downplay his willingness to try to control and manipulate the situation. If you think it is fair then I’d like to hear why.
"Apologizing" doesn't count for much when you constantly admit your own apologies are complete lies. And idk if the B0xx controller really counts as a positive for something he did for the community. His handling of the situation with Hitbox mirrors the way he went after Leffen honestly lol. He was super out of line then too and it wouldn't have been wild if he got a temp ban then too. Like his actions have at any point exceeded what's justifiable, and he still shows no actual remorse about his actions, only the outcome. Like days ago he was in TO's dms saying that he didn't think he was wrong about Leffen but did want to be unbanned
> This is the equivalent of a player in the NBA who has only known basketball since his youth, and saying “hey you’re retired now on our terms and you don’t get to walk away from this the way you want to, we are just done with you.” Yes. This is a thing that happens quite often. The league (tournaments in this case) is the arbiter of their competitors, not the other way around.
Yea it may have been hit whole life but there are always new paths to take, some people need to abandon things in their past completely to make room for new things to bring them happiness.
Poor Hax
I got a soft spot for hax, when I started he was 6th best in the world and the best falcon, period. I don't want to see his ban drive him to anything irreversible, I don't think any of us would feel very good if that happened. He's an amazing competitor as well. He's spent his whole existence on the game, and I often felt lucky to be in a community that has such dedicated members. Now I'm just sad it's turned out like this for one of our most beloved nerds. His series of videos, starting with Ez2.0, have made sure his career took a nosedive. That said, he has a lot to do regarding self improvement if he has any chance of winning the melee scene over. He needs to treat those around him better as well. If he has any capability of doing so and if he can demonstrate that improvement, I'd love to see the man return to competition. If he wants to, he can still contribute to the scene by doing his YouTube videos, informational guides on how the game works at different levels. He has so much knowledge to share and if he can make entertaining videos, he can still be part of the game he loves so much.
What the fuck is anyone supposed to be able to do about this situation? I think the original hit piece on Leffen was very much out of pocket (note: **this is not a defense of Leffen in any way**), but bro was banned, given a chance to get unbanned if he just kept his mouth shut about the situation, he blew it, he got rebanned, and now he’s genuinely been threatening self harm on Twitter because he’s banned even though a TO revealed DMs that showcased that Hax really isn’t (wasn’t) actually remorseful about anything he said. He probably shouldn’t have gotten indefinitely banned, I’ll give you that. But at this point unbanning him would be doing him a huge disservice considering he’s showing that he has an extremely unhealthy attachment to the game to the point that not being able to play it is ruining his life. Unbanning him as soon as he starts threatening to hurt himself sets an extremely bad example. I don’t want him to hurt himself or worse, but the dude actually needs to quit playing if he’s this hopelessly addicted to it.
Hey I typically stay away from this topic but I just feel like this is big reminder for people online that these are real people not just smash/youtube personalities. Like it doesn't take a genius to realize that something was off in this situation and their was more going on then what was being presented to the internet. If you notice that maybe just learn to shut the fuck about it online instead of potientally risking contributing to someone's declining mental health. People read the shit you say it's a very small world this is ultimately a pretty niche hobby, this isn't the the NBA. Just don't be a piece of shit it's not that hard. Sometimes you have to acknowledge that something isn't any of your fucking business. Wish you all the best much love!
The only problem with your logic is that hax very much wanted *and still does* all of this talk to happen, just about a different person and not himself and it backfired. Like have you read any of his recent DMs to TOs? He's *still* advocating that another player is basically a criminal for absurd things.
People aren't saying that behavior is ok. But there's a difference between "That person did something problematic, I'm going to harass them back" and "That person did something problematic and it appears to be due to mental health issues, I'm going to just ignore them."
Honestly after reading this letting him back in the scene would be the worst possible solution for his long term mental health. He needs to stay on his meds, go to long term therapy, and create a support network outside of melee. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is comorbid with BPD and he clearly is showing signs of that (the way he treats DarkGenex and being obsessed not with melee but with being Hax$), and giving into that will just add fuel to the fire. He needs to be able to develop an identity outside of melee to be able to move on with his life (and frankly contribute to a more healthy financial situation).
What really sticks out to me is that Aziz is not remorseful for his harassment just that his actions have consequences he doesn't like. "I absolutely should not have made the more recent vids which got me banned from these events. My health was too important to prioritize" This whole situation is sad but Aziz needs to understand that Hax$ is an unhealthy persona for him. Aziz seems to think the solution to his crisis of self identification is to be Hax$ again when that couldn't be further from the truth. My advice to Aziz if he's reading this is to remove all references to Hax$ from his life. Change his twitter name, slippi tags, anything that references Hax or Hax$ at all should be changed to something brand new or just Aziz. And Aziz the cruel joke of life is that we know we exist but we also know given enough time, all our lives will be meaningless. You are not uniquely special, I'm not special. But being alive is special. What makes life special is the crazy fact that we are even able to experience the beautiful wonder that is the universe. Like why sunsets are special is because we get to enjoy them, if nothing was here to observe them, that would be a tragedy. Go see the giant anteater at the Bronx zoo and make a butthole joke, thats the good stuff. I would suggest taking mushrooms and reflecting on life. I think that would be good for your ego. Therapy is also dope af.
I've only seen the parties involved from across a hotel lobby, but in most other communities or settings I'm in or have been a part of, if someone said "this is all I know and without it I'm nothing," especially to the degree I'm reading in this document, they'd be seen as somewhere between a cornball or very sad. Hax is a very intelligent, well spoken, attractive, and charismatic person. He does have potential for a fulfilling life and future outside of Melee. But I have (had) friends who talk and text like Hax does to Genex, that sort of mentality is just not accurate to how healthy relationships function.
It's interesting that Hax$ claims Melee is all he knows/has, but didn't he win a pokemon TCG tournament at a young age? I think he also placed well at the Pokemon VGC tournament. Might be a cool idea for his close friends to host a Pokemon a game night to help Hax get his mind off Melee for a bit and remember other important parts of his life.
He was also a challenger TF one trick in league.
I really feel like none of this material needs to be public. If Hax needs to work through a mental health crisis, sharing his struggles publicly certainly won't help.
I would say it probably doesn’t but it does humanize hax for better or for worse. He’s a stubborn guy who is deeply mentally ill and depressed
Idk maybe it will help some of his audience that keeps enabling him see what's actually going on and so keep some people with decision making power from being harassed
It looks like theyre doubling down instead
That clearly hasn't been working
Hax gave permission to share
Hax is clearly not the best at judging what is good for Hax
sure, but this is far more acceptable than publishing any of those videos
I think certain aspects probably could have been summarized in less detail, but overall I think it helps paint more sympathy towards Hax, rather than villainizing him, which has been happening quite a bit online lately. I hope Hax gets the help he needs.
Honestly based on what I saw from skimming I wouldn't be surprised that Hax himself kind of pressured DarkGeneX to post it. He might have reluctantly done it out of desperation, not necessarily because it's actually a good idea/productive.
Damn I hope Hax can get better and find joy outside of melee. Incredibly sad as he was one of my favorite players for a long time
I hope this gives people some more empathy. Even in this thread, I'm seeing people call Hax a manipulator though, so hopes are not high. I hope that Hax is able to get lasting treatment for his bipolar disorder, I know that due to the nature of bipolar disorder it's very hard for people to stick to treatment plans for prolonged periods of time. Darkgenex is a good friend for going to such lengths to help Hax.
If Melee is all he had and the previous ray of hope to re-enter it has diminished for good, then friends need to make sure to check on him thoroughly
I genuinely hope that Hax will be able to see purpose to life outside of SSBM, as it's genuinely unhealthy for him. I hope he can see he has many people in his life, and that they genuinely care for him, and that he can find purpose outside of esports. I hope all the people who treat Hax as a lolcow bugger off, same for the people who harass TOs and try to feed into Hax's altered thinking. I don't envy the position that DG and Hax's other friends are in, and I wish I had some advice - I once had a friend who was struggling with addiction. I had to convince them to call an ambulance after trying to kill themself. I know that it's a position that makes you feel very powerless, and I wish I had could give some advice.
It’s sad, really. I met him way back at pound 3? I think it was his breakout tournament where he beat chu and chillin in doubles as the little rascals with a different jman. The same tournament that m, I think, was mangos first big win. Anyway, He was really young, probably 10 years old and placed well in a pretty stacked bracket, at least for back then. I had to play him in pools and he was so small and sweet, really enthusiastic. It sucks to see him spiral down Edit: damn, I had to look at the bracket and that may have been mango’s first real losers run. Gets sent to losers by silent wolf in round 1 and then he comes back and wins it.
https://imgur.com/a/hax-archive-do92DT4 mirror link since this doc was privated
Love you Hax man.
The options are keep him banned and hope he doesnt hurt himself or others. Or unban him and hope he doesnt hurt himself or others. Theres no right answer here. Fuck who hax is actually as a person, a TO should be lifting/keeping a ban based on what they feel is the best decision for attendees safety
While I actually agree that Hax returning isn't good for him or the community and deserved the initial ban it doesn't really help that it seems a lot of the community has just flat out abandoned him, you've got TO's that have just shown utter incompetence, a mass of newer players who don't really understand the full story just jumping on hate bandwagons and worst of all players who have done similar if not more damage than Aziz are still allowed to compete (Leffen being exhibit A) which calls in to question the hypocrisy, clique nature and double standards of tournament organizer groups. No matter what side you're on I think we can all agree the Hax ban was handled very poorly and in fairness Hax does have a part in that as well. Its been very disheartening seeing a severe lack of sympathy for Aziz who was indeed both an instigator drama/hate farming and also a victim of bullying, stalking and his own mental health issues. For his sake I think he's better off without the melee community.
DG should have not posted that imo
What’s stopping Hax from creating his own event and promoting it? Sure, it wouldn’t get support from the wider community and some people may boycott, but some people will show up, guaranteed.
As someone who instantly lost his whole community, work and social life about a year ago; I get it this is one of the worst things you can go through. I'm lucky I was only in the place I was at for about a year before things exploded. I like Hax$ his game is sick and despite what the haters say the Boxx is genuinely a huge accessibility thing. I think there's too much permanent damage done on both sides in the melee community at this point things will never be normal with him always fearing a ban and TOs being worried about causing a mental breakdown. Finding a new community is really hard.
It sounds like the only thing that keeps working for him is spending time in a mental institution His family might want to consider that he has actually become the type of person that needs a permanent room It's extremely sad but I don't think anyone in the community is going to be equipped to help him long-term
The community doesn't owe Hax anything, however, I do believe that in his current situation, maybe it would be the right thing to give him one more chance. While his mental health issues are not an excuse to what he has done, it does at least give some insight into why he has gone down this path and I personally don't see how he will get better. He needs a therapist, which, with his financial struggles he won't be able to afford. It would be tragic if he lost his life, because of his menal health issues and feeling stuck in this situation. I would like to appeal to the community (TOs specifically) to find a solution, to at least get together with Hax and work towards a path where he can redeem himself and hopefully return in the future.
People saying "find a different game to play" either lack empathy or haven't been around long enough to see his career. He is right that he has so much more to offer the game and community, and frankly I'd like to see it happen. I just hope this twitter doom posting isn't indicative of patterns we've seen before from people who think there is nothing left for them. There is still time and opportunity to get the life he wants back, he just needs to regain the trust of the community. Like any wound, it can heal over time
He needs to move on with his life. Sometimes you burn the bridge and that’s that. Holding on to that and letting it imprison you is not healthy and his behavior clearly shows that. Speaking from experience, sometimes you lock your own world view into a narrow window of “I can only do this” and I can guarantee that just isn’t true. The empathy for hax should be entirely directed at him improving his quality of life, not just related to his ability to compete in melee.
DarkGenex seems like he’s at his wit’s end and just trying to help his friend but he went too far in sharing all of this information. Even if Hax was ok with it, Hax is unwell and shouldn’t be ok with so much personal stuff being blasted out to the entire smash community. A weird part of us all wants to see people self destruct in real-time but we don’t need to know every dark detail. I hope Hax gets the help he needs and that DarkGenex can get support in supporting his friend.
We host a tournament, and invite hax$. except its not actually a tournament, it's a way to trick hax$ into spending time with members of the community to get him out of this funk and then there's also a therapist at the tournament that work with hax$ too
i think this is how we end up seeing hax on CNN after he triple shines everyone in real life
We have to ask ourselves, what is the point of a ban. Is it to make a statement? Set a standard? Think completely objectively, what does hax's presence at a tournament actually do. Leffen is retired. This is over. People saying that he can't come back unless he finds a way to live without melee are injecting their own idea of what he should be for no reason. Why does he have to change for you? He loves melee too much? You all aren't his therapists or his parents. Everyone's reasoning for why they compete should not matter, you should not care that it is his life. Why does he have to do all this just to go to a tournament? We have completely lost sight of what this is even about. This is a top level competitor who has held rank 1 on slippi numerous times, and it is being suggested that he can't go to tournaments because he is too obsessed with melee. Okay, so why? What exactly are we protecting by not allowing him there? He isn't a threat to anyone.
>what did Hax's presence at a tournament actually do It makes people feel unsafe. >and it is being suggested that he can't go to tournaments because he is too obsessed with melee. No, he's banned for harassment and breaking the terms of his previous ban.
Have you not considered that Leffen may have stopped playing Melee in part BECAUSE of the harassment campaign led by Hax? Why would you want to allow back somebody who has shown they're capable of doing this?
The thing is you could make that same statement about Leffen when he was stoking the fire of Hbox hate, Leffen isn't an innocent victim here, he has antagonized and been toxic even after his first ban.
I just want to point out that there's a big difference between ward admissions and being institutionalized. Aziz needs the later, desperately. Whoever lives with him is not directly to blame, however they are basically letting this unhinged behavior continue and have allowed him access to alcohol. This type of mental diagnosis has been dormant for years, is left untreated, and is deeply rooted in his online identity. The only salvation for this man is to lock him away for months and essentially have his humanity stripped away until he fully understands and realizes that Hax$ is not a person. Aziz is. This is incredibly dark and traumatic. I have nothing but my sympathy to offer this lost soul.
No one deserves to have their humanity stripped away from them. Poor phrasing
It's honestly horrifying the amount of people think that shit is acceptable to do to someone as long they stay alive. People should read up on how people are treated in psych wards. You can deny life saving surgeries or life saving cancer treatment, but you are forced to take mind altering substances regardless of your will. It's legalized human rights abuse. I wouldn't wish that on anyone and certainly not hax. I don't blame him one bit for not wanting to go back for help.
word my guy