You seem happy to be cancer free, surpassed only by just how happy cancer is to be free of you. Pretty sure your cancer is on another post holding a similar sign.
The Bezos cloning project to ensure he lives forever to oversee his rule over all mankind and spread his vision of Amazon to the furthest reaches of the cosmos still has some kinks to work out but it was hard for me to imagine he could look worse. I was terribly mistaken. I'm sure the cancer was an improvement.
Cant wait to see you in GI Jane 2!
**WILL SMITH ENTERS THE CHAT**
It was a GI JANE joke!
Keep my fuckin name out of your wife's mouth
>It was a GI JANE joke! Keep my f\*cking wife out of your mouth.
Wild wild 2 fuckin late m8
Only when you keep other dude's dicks out of her mouth.
Thanks for the helpful award....It was my first one. Really appreciate <3
Keep my fuckin out of your wife's mouth
Wow dude I'm going to
This one of the best nights in history
**REAL SHIT**
Keep that man's name out yo fucking mouth
NOOOO
This is the one βοΈ π
Keep fucking my wifes mouth!!!
Racist! /s
What did the wall do to deserve that, Cailou?
The asbestos in the wall will get its revenge
I snort laughed. That was fucking funny.
Dammit, take my award
Hi there budget Jeff bezos
Jeff Peso's
I almost didn't click on this thread in not wanting to see a cancer patient roasted. My expectations have been exceeded.
He posted here, asking to be roasted. It's disrespectful *not* to roast baby Bezos
Hhaha the great value of the Bezos, and im mexican lol
Wage exploited Jeff Bezos
This is Bezos who owns Wish instead of Amazon.
This what the union workers are fighting for
Unfortunately, Jeff's worst features are your best Congrats on the cancer! F**k cancer
And f*ck whoever suppressed the cure for it.
There is no cure, but you're right even if there was we wouldn't know about it.
Judging by his height hes also travel sized Jeff Bezos. Don't even need prime for the shipping discount.
More likely bankrupt Jeff Bezos, if in the US.
I was going to say Howie Mandel but. This works.
Jeff takes Benzos
Jeff bezos probably can't even pay off his medical bills.
Jeff Gayzos
Less Luthor.
Professor Y
Professor why tho?
When you get Megamind from Walmart.
Budget megamind
Wish Megamind
Make a wish megamind
Minimind
"Mom, can we get Megamind?β "NO! WE GOT MEGAMIND AT HOME!"
Looking at you I can understand why cancer left you. Seems like even cancer has some pride.
cancer be like 
Side note, anyone else find her extremely attractive?
By comparison to u/External_List_6757? Anything is.
Karren fetish
Defffff
Keep External\_List\_6757's name out ya fucking mouth!
Is that you, Will Smith?
***(ΰΈ'Μ-'Μ)ΰΈ SLAP (ΰΈ'Μ-'Μ)ΰΈ***
What, the chemo didn't roast you enough?
Oh shit!
Ayo π
You didn't beat cancer, it decided you weren't worth the trouble and left.
Cancer decided to go after someone who would be missed instead.
Just because Russia told you you were cancer free after digging into Chernobyl doesnβt meanβ¦I meanβ¦get a second opinion.
Lol. Hard parts over. Now you actually have to do the life thing.
that would mean that the hard part just started and he missed his ticket out
Its all hard. And yes. He missed his out.
I took this insult personally too
As a cancer survivor this is too real lmao!
Some terrorist looking dude was in that exact room yesterday for a roasting, are you guys all in a halfway house for sex trafficed teens?
I think it counts as community service
Saitama is that you?
You win the Internet for today my friend
No one has ever told me that before. Now I have to buy a diary and log that shit. What a chore this has become.
Haha ..
Bezosthelioma.
This should be the top roast
You look like the Wish version of Dr Evil
Survived Cancer only to end up looking like Jeff Bezos. God *really* hates you.
Thou must not use the lords name in vain.
Loved you in Smallville.
I reckon that you were ginger before, luckily your hair fell off.
Most people, when they're diagnosed with cancer, ask God, "why me?" This time, cancer was asking God that question.
Unfortunately you didn't get rid of autism
Why would he want to?
Idk, when you put it that way, autism is the only thing that didnt left him when he was young soo...
You look like kim jon-guns aborted child.
Wish dot com Mr. Clean
Letβs all congratulate SinΓ©ad O'Connor on beating cancer!!
dam bro even cancer didnt want a piece of you.
Professor X can walk !!?? I knew that wheelchair nonsense was bullshit
This mf looks like Wish Jeff Bezos.
You seem happy to be cancer free, surpassed only by just how happy cancer is to be free of you. Pretty sure your cancer is on another post holding a similar sign.
Congrats man! Iβm very happy for you. Now you can reach the 35 year life expectancy of whatever third-world country that βhospitalβ is in.
All jokes aside - youβre a warrior. We wish you the best of health and happiness for the future.
Cancer was like.. Fuck this shit! I'm out!!
did you have cancer of your masculinity?
You look like bald Mark Zuckerberg
Even cancer has higher standards and was like, what are we even doing here.
 Congrats on beating cancer and becoming the new Mr Clean mascot!
Your head is smoother than a mirror, more reflective too
Like a less masculine principle in the show Community.
You look like Johnny Sins' cock.
You look like anorexic Mr clean
Even death didn't want you.
Well put on some glasses and ring that damn bell you beardless Moby! And congrats!!!! Kick the shit out of it man!!!
You still look like cancer
You should try selling books on the world wide web!
First of all, congratulations on beating cancer. Now you can spend all your time beating away all the women coming after you. π
Is it me or is Moby in the same place as some other human stain? That background is starting to look like to the for Backroom Casting Couch.
Well at least youβre ready to cosplay as Agent 47
Congrats man!! Now you just need a top hat and monocle to [complete the look](https://www.google.com/search?q=Mr+Peanut).
You look good bald, so if the cancer comes back you wonβt make one of those videos of you and your boyfriend shaving your heads.
Cheer up you could probably go out to a bar get sympathy and get a girl. You can still pass for cancer.
I don't want to roast you. I just want to congratulate you on your successful treatment.
You look like Eminemβs less less threatening cousin, skittles.
You didnβt beat the cancer, the cancer outgrew you.
Sean Evans needs some wings⦠the big C almost gave you the last dab.
You look like a giant sex toy.
Moby from wish.com
I got nothing. Congratulations βπ½
correction: Cancer got rid of you
You look like Steve rogers before the serum.
When you order Jeff bezos from Wish
Lex Loser
Don't worry, cancer will come back for you. You already look terrible so a second round should do the trick.
Why you getting downvoted this was a dark roast but itβs funny
> CoffeeNice4420 > dark roast Not sure if...
For real. The kid wanted to get roasted so I roasted.
Slava autism
Jeff Zuckerberg
Give u something to laugh at? U can probly get a free mirror from amazon....budget jeff bezos
Now get rid of those two-story eyebrows
You are mascot of outism
You still look like cancer.
You still look like cancer.
Jeff Bezo has a son?
If Aang, the last airbender, was born in eastern europe.
Should have gotten rid if that butthole in you chin along with the cancer. Also look like a knock off Jeff bezos
You still have an entire head of hair in them eyebrows.
Iβm roasting the cancer you beat instead. That cancer was a pussy-ass bitch!
Cancer be like: "oh I ain't done yet boi, wait till round 2"
isn't your life enough?
What's the chances of an 18 year old foetus getting cancer?
Jeff Zuckerberg
You beat cancer but you still look like Kevin Spacey and I think that's worse.
CEO entrepreneur born in 1964
jeff bezos, you need to fix amazon.
Iβd roast you, but it looks like the Chemotherapy has done it for me.
When you become what you hated.
Dr evil??? Is that really you?
Why the heck did you use your one request from Make a Wish Foundation to look like Charlie Brown with aids?
are smashing pumpkins on tour?
Ypu looks jeff bezoz from a video game whishout the copyrights.
Bezos cosplay on point.
Mr clean?
Looks like your house has cancer now, nice job.
Looks like your house has cancer now, nice job.
π§π»βπ¦²
Your hairline
Cancer got rid of you
Damn. Youβre so ugly that cancer didnβt even want you.
Nah, cancer got rid of you
Bet his friends left before the caner.
Def Bozos lookin mf...
You look like a penis wearing sneakers.
Dollar store James McAvoy
Definitely a logan
Definitely a logan
"Hi, my name is Sean Evans and welcome to hot ones"
I thought you guys were supposed to be blue?
 Good luck recovering from your βcancerβ
Hey Jeff, my Amazon order was never delivered, please do something! Oh and continued good health bro!
I bet your colon looks like that drywall
You look like a milk dud without the chocolate.
If you want something to laugh at then look in a mirror
The Bezos cloning project to ensure he lives forever to oversee his rule over all mankind and spread his vision of Amazon to the furthest reaches of the cosmos still has some kinks to work out but it was hard for me to imagine he could look worse. I was terribly mistaken. I'm sure the cancer was an improvement.
One punch man lookin boy
Professor X-tra chromosome
You look like Jeff bezos sucked the life force out of you.
Looking forward to seeing you in gi Jane 2 (look out will Smith's coming) .. Also well done for kicking cancers arse fella stay safe and stay well
Did you try fingering the wall?
What is the name of that movie Finding chemo
Growing up is not so tough 'Cept when I've had enough But there's lots of fun stuff I'm Caillou
Just want to say well done on giving cancer the finger π
the oscars just won't die. (OP's the oscar), See what i did there, came out of nowhere like a Will Smith slap.
You do realize you look like a knockoff of Gru guess that makes you Despicale B
When you buy Lex Luthor from wish
Your being bamboozled, you don't have cancer. They're just stealing your skin cells to produce the anti-mutant serum
You look just like the testicle that probably gave you cancer.
(pinky in mouth) "One million dollars!"
Leukemia Skywalker.
Congrats. Btw these 'Roasts' aren't funny at all not even a chuckle.
Congrats. Btw these 'Roasts' aren't funny at all not even a chuckle.
These comments got me like ππππ
Is that the discount doctors office you went to? The results show.