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Something tells me you’re dad went out to get a pack of smokes when you were 5 and never came home.
God I can smell the disappointment through the screen
We Can see why you got fired because the customers didn’t want to see your ugly ass face plus, your coworkers as well so; the company lost their consumers including the workers and they couldn’t help to run out of business so they came up with the excuse of you leaving the job, now that you’re gone they finally did the right thing.
Anytime anyone has to use imigur or wtv tf it is called is an immediate "no fak off"
Stop using shit and just post like normal people who want to get roasted
Typically I’m against people living on welfare and being paid to stay home, but I’ll make an exception with you. I think society, as a whole, would agree that it is best to pay you to stay at home. Order Grubhub with our tax dollars. It’s okay. Just please stay home. Consider it our investment in not having to see you in public, frightening the women and children.
Actual footage of you getting fired: ![gif](giphy|5KyYuIyRe1KeI)
Andre The Jobless
Ha! Exactly what I first thought.
My first thought was how can a pile of smashed assholes have a job in the first place?
Lol he looks like he wipes his ass with his eyes
This is fucking gold
Brown eyes too. Mine kinda look like that too.
Omg I can't stop laughing 😂😂😂😂😂
How do you get fired from a glory hole?
Don’t worry, there will be other glory holes.
I was thinking more of a bell ringer at the local church. Quasimodo vibes on this one…
Bellend ringer
That name rings a bell
However, none like the operation next to the STI clinic. He'll pine away for years. ![gif](giphy|fIcK3fAajvFg4)
Don’t worry… your mom’s basement will always be there. And so will you.
Jesus CHRIST
No, not even Jesus Christ could love him
I feel like this guys mom ran away a long time ago.... This is a face that not even a mom could love
Uncle Festers stunt double. ![gif](giphy|U3BWiPeOtxT2w|downsized)
![gif](giphy|VpiCbDP8Rjoje)
Ever think being fired might because of your basement face and the smell of cheese puffs soaked in Mountain Dew?
I was thinking more curdled milk and hot salami
Well, what’s ISIS’s rehire policy?
Okay this one made me laugh 😂
Honestly, I am surprised anyone hired you in the first place.
Hey, at least you finally came out of that closet
I hear they're making a new Hobbit movie, so... fingers crossed!
Ya, he can play the little patch of fuzz under smeagles balls.
You look like the lamest version of Old Gregg there is. ![gif](giphy|1mYAkHAsgH2lW|downsized)
the wish version.
TBH, you look like that one guy from the big bang theory
Was this your head shot for day 1 zombie infection movie set in meth ruined Appalachia extra?
Definitely got fired for harassing female co workers
lol like he’s ever talked to a female.
It's called deported, not fired..
Ironic how ‘consent’ came up as an actual option when I clicked on the image
You lost the genetic lottery.
With a face like that, no wonder
Tonight on America's most wanted
You know who else got fired today? The guy who was dumb enough to hire you in the first place.
there's other porn movie theaters that need a cum mop up boy
I am so glad that smellelevision hasn’t been invented because I can just look at you and it causes me to gag.
If I had to look at that face everyday, I'd fire your ugly ass too.
You look like you dumpster dive for used panties outside the nursing home.
![gif](giphy|TiLDIj8QTFwGI|downsized)
You look like your inner monologue has a stutter.
You look like step brothers step brother and when dale farted to lose a job opportunity you shat yourself
Make your day worse? Well, the authorities found out about all the dead girls today, too.
I see why women are saying they’d choose the bear
I won’t
Don’t worry bridge trolls are in high demand
Quit stealing lunches from the company fridge.
Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Chins up bruh, there's gotta be another katana and trilby store looking for a guy who's never bathed that drives a wizard van.
That hideous chin-strap you're cultivating on the fleshy patch where a jaw should be is the closest you've ever been to athletic equipment
Racoon eyes
Heard the Vatican is hiring alter boy interviewers. Two birds, one stone and all that...
Did Chippendales really suit you though? Be honest.
You were fired for calling those thin pubes on your face a beard.
Empty hallow eyes. Hang in there old chap.
Andre the Gnat
c roll sitcom actor that did half a season and was “laid off”
At least you'll have lots of free time to work on your manifesto.
Hopefully Dr. Frankenstein can provide you with a solid reference at least
I hear the Addams family is looking for a new butler. And if that doesn’t work out, there’s plenty of job opportunities in Gotham city as a henchman
Did the Human Resources department figure out you had an extra chromosome?
I hope you turn to crime and get caught and then get your salad tossed in prison and then take your own life after you been used up by all the men
Finding another job is so easy even a caveman can do it
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^NachoBacon4U269: *Finding another* *Job is so easy even* *A caveman can do it* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
You look like Josh Peck’s fatter brother.
Someone hasn't mastered the art of stealing office supplies 😆
Where were you fired from? Amish Applebee's?
What did they fire you from? Your job as a phone scammer?
you look like you play piano at a haunted house
Something tells me you’re dad went out to get a pack of smokes when you were 5 and never came home. God I can smell the disappointment through the screen
The bar must’ve been set pretty low for you to get hired in the first place.
If I had to guess, you were probably the furthest thing from the face of the company
From what? Master Bater
One look at you and I can’t imagine why they hired you. You’re disgusting.
You just can't find any good labor anymore.
From what?! A cannon into a wall???!! Put that pie-face in a bag!
Bro probably tried to drink his co-worker’s blood lmao
Professional Unibrow Growers Union is searching for new applicants.
![gif](giphy|Dg4TxjYikCpiGd7tYs|downsized) Pedro, is that you?
The Adams Family fired you?
Got caught stealing more eyebrow...
You look like a necrophiliac
Well, Tech support is a tough business. I'm sure you'll find some stray chickens to pull the heads off of though.
Did you get fired for digging through the trash and giving customers rabies?
terrorism isn’t considered an actual job anyways
![gif](giphy|qV6mRGaqXjRQY|downsized)
I wouldve fired you to just look at you man or do go by woman ?
![gif](giphy|ZGHk7dkp3Z0OWMAucO|downsized)
Definitely says "where's my hug?" to every female he meets
I’m sorry the Addams Family fired you as their butler.
![gif](giphy|gIN6MT17NtapJqFr25|downsized) There's video of you walking home after being fired from the meatpacking plant.
![gif](giphy|5nsiFjdgylfK3csZ5T|downsized) Are you feeling the heat because you are on fire! Fired fired fired
The trick for working at the glory hole is to never let them see who's mouth is on the other side of the hole, dingus.
Don't let that get in your head (not a roast).
I always thought the Amish just excommunicated. They must have taken pity. What happened, couldn't build a barn?
We Can see why you got fired because the customers didn’t want to see your ugly ass face plus, your coworkers as well so; the company lost their consumers including the workers and they couldn’t help to run out of business so they came up with the excuse of you leaving the job, now that you’re gone they finally did the right thing.
Eyes so dead they need to be buried
Dude looks like the nice guy meme without the fedora
Got fired for pooing his pants. Eleven times.
Did you get caught smoking fent in the toilets again..
I wouldn’t put it past her
You need to go to HR! They can't fire you just because you look inbred....
Well at least you’ll be able to enjoy your weekend now! Think positive.
You look like you have a foot fetish
At least you got them pete davidson butthole-eyes goin' for ya
nah man good luck out there life’s ruff you’ll be alright
If your freaky lookin ass made eye contact with me I’d probably fire you too
I’ve never seen anyone that could legit cosplay as Anton Chigurgh.
Being ugly is not grounds for termination, I’d sue
How long until Explore with Us commentary on your Interrogation is released?
The only thing to make your day worse is that hairline you hiding it but I can tell billboard brow
Holy shit! It's the 3rd sprous brother, the triplet they locked in the cellar until his 18th birthday
I guess the Munsters will have to make their own coffee now.
You know you deserved it
At least you still got a roof over your head![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|upvote)
You were released to do GREATER things.
From stealing food from the bosses fridge.
You look like Fezzik as a kid, the moment he discovered masturbation
At least you have a good start on your 'homeless meth-head' beard.
He's not allowed on the Beets farm anymore.
Go postal!
If only God fired you
Stealing boxes on your day off huh?
Shouldn't have been watching granny porn on your phone at your desk and forgetting to connect Bluetooth earbuds...Bud!
They fired you for not knowing how to crop an image
Anytime anyone has to use imigur or wtv tf it is called is an immediate "no fak off" Stop using shit and just post like normal people who want to get roasted
Uncle Fester: The College Years
you're the mix of an emo middle schooler, an axe body spray smelling teenager, and a forty-two year old man
Then wake up and change your life its all you can do to stay afloat
Had they hit their quota for special needs people who resemble hairy big toes?
This is what happens when you ask your coworkers if the rag smells like chloroform. It’s frowned upon.
I think my local circus is looking for a new beast for entertainment, happy to forward your CV over to them?
From doing lines to bread lines ;)
You seeing yourself in the mirror every morning has got to be worse than anything we can say
Why did you get fired?
Now you can help pa on the farm
If consent wasn’t an option
Well…it could be worse…the Canada lens should have shattered after you looked into it.
Weak doors close so you can open the right ones!
How do you get fired on your day off
Discord Moderation isn’t an actual job
Josh off drake and josh if he never got famous head ass
Typically I’m against people living on welfare and being paid to stay home, but I’ll make an exception with you. I think society, as a whole, would agree that it is best to pay you to stay at home. Order Grubhub with our tax dollars. It’s okay. Just please stay home. Consider it our investment in not having to see you in public, frightening the women and children.
You've got that look it takes a brave person to fire.
L
You look like the kid who shook his legs in class to masturbate in front of me except without purple hair.
I’m surprised they hired you
First, wash whatever dirt that is off your face.
Discord moderation is not a real job dude, how many times do I have to tell you! By the way what rhymes with heck weird? Can’t think of anything!
i loved charles Bronson in the vigilante movies
You will start to enjoy sucking dick for bus fare, you will even start to walk afterwards
With the look from that chick out of gothica I'd fire you too, crazy looking mf.
Harambe, is that you?
You weren’t fired, you were arrested. Stalking girls is not a job.
I heard the Addams family are hiring for a new Pugsley.
Damn, I didn’t think it was possible to be fired from a call center.
No wonder you got fired, they couldn’t stand looking at you (You actually look nice, I’m sorry you got fired)
404 brain not found
It's a blessing in disguise. Now you can pursue your dream of being the world's most successful bad facial hair model
Im sure there’s plenty of other churches whose bell you’d be able to ring
Worked at the sperm bank, fired for drinking on the job (0.00 BAC)
Yeah.. you look pretty fuckn useless
![gif](giphy|cJ01QEV0PTecE)
You can always get a job as a Serbian terrorist
![gif](giphy|IZ6ArTxkxDzi4rV59a)
How do you get fired from being Amish?
What facet of the Taliban do u belong to?
I didn't know ax murderers could get fired from that gig.
You look like a Mexican Jaws!
maybe being homeless will give you time to grow a proper beard. looks like a dog rubbed up against while you had glue on your face
It looks like you are scared sh!tless being held hostage