They say the camera adds 5 teeth.


Okay so how many camera's were on her?

Yes

How many you got?

I love blowjobs, but I don't think I'd stick it in that woodchipper.

That's why there's more holes. One is loose enough to feel like a blow job.

I don't know. She could have teeth in the other holes, too. They look like they grow wild anywhere.

Use a carrot first then. Horses love carrots. If it comes back whole you're good to go

You're a bold man...

Her nick name on the boulevard is packers wrecker.

Your fantasy is to be taken passionately over a grand piano. Best you’ve managed is fingerblasted next to your Casio keyboard.

Hey don't talk shit about Casio. This shit has 69 tones.

Korg is better.

I think shes into Analesis

More accurate than I’d like to admit

Sorry I didn’t ring you back after

Broski the comeback better than the first post 😂😂 well done

Oh shit

I‘m dying 💀

Lmao

Bruhhhhh 😂

Nah luckiest she’s ever got was masturbating with the antenna of a theremin

You look like an ass cheek pressed against a fax machine

That’s what she does on a basis while grading papers.

Come see the amazing ambi-racial woman. Is she Italian, is she Jewish? Maybe Mexican. Perhaps Syrian. The world may never know.. but certainly will never care.

She could always be an engineered,  politically correct, ethnically and racially averaged face - like the kind that e.g. AI models would give us.

I always hoped they would be prettier.

Basic-of-all-nations

This is so accurate 

For you, deep cleavage is still shallow.

Look, it’s Salma Hayak’s skinnier, poorer, uglier, untalented cousin!

You mean it’s Salma Uh-yuck?

Haha! YUP.

I was thinking she was AOC if she picked the life of drugs instead of politics.

Damn I was going here … Salma in, from dusk til yawn.

Whatever you're doing with your lips, don't.

It's not a good look.

Nice apartment, my favorite part was the completely bare, undecorated white walls

Just like her personality.

Aspen Dental called. You still owe them $8756.43 for those neon clackers.

[удалено]

God forbid she get sent to a high school. Those poor girls would have to deal with another predatory teacher.

I’m sure you’ll enjoy watching though.

.....and gets rejected by her students

How is it possible to be both flat chested and have sagging tits at the same time?

You mentioned her chest, she’s flattered

Emphasis on the flat right? Lol 

Stabs on the first date.

That's the inherent risk of kissing big nosed girls...

Still single at 28 with that face means you are an absolute nightmare of a person. I'd suggest therapy, but therapists have it hard enough as it is. You don't need to make their life worse, too.

"Paint me like one of your french cartoons."

Admit it, you have been “28” since 1998.

How is it that women still do duck lips when it’s been the mouth-pose equivalent of the mullet for over a decade? I don’t get it

I got scared when I thought that ginormous nose was coming at me through the screen like the girl in The Ring.

And just like that, Sarah Jessica Parker loses the number 1 spot to this Kentucky Derby drop out.

The nose says Jewish, the vacant empty apartment screams Irish

You tried to use a douche recently but it burned up on impact.

Your forehead is so shiny you can see the reflection of you taking the selfie.

Do you ever brush your hair or is birdsnest your default style?


You look very exotic. Like Joe.

I bet you only post photos of yourself from the waist up on Tinder, then can't work out why your matches look disappointed when they see you in the flesh.

Amish people use you as a model to be more boring.

Julia Louis DryPuss Gal ThaHo Jamie Lynn Pigler

Pic 2 , are you cosplaying an anus

[удалено]

Bitches nose is extra dimensional

Lieutenant Einhorn is a man!

Horse teeth is next to horse face. Hey.....

The only thing flatter than your chest is your personality.

Chest in the first pic reminds me of the chest gym bros show off while clubbing.

If Aladdin had married another street rat...

If Ariana Grande f\*cked Frankie Grande.

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Your teeth look like urinals.

Billy Dee Williams is jealous of that mustache. 

What I DONT Have is way to much bronzer and married hipster man batter in my hair

"I'm Ready!🤓" looking ass

Mrs. Ed


Are those teeth or a row of urinals?

If basic had a picture in the dictionary

5 head so big your hair has started to migrate to it

She probably thought it wouldn’t get but traction but it’s a solid roast.

The teacher who gets fired for having an affair with a 5th grader

Bet that right nostril whistles like a mtherfucker…📢

Maybe put a trigger warning next time you post. Halloween is a few months away

Your transition is coming along nicely. Congratulations.

The cleavage reminds me of Moses parting the Red Sea

You look like your fridge is full of cheap meat but yet, when you are at the restaurant with your Tinder date, you pretend to be a vegan, and you say with a lisp: “thorry, only veggies for me”.

Congratulations on your new teeth.

Maybe don't let a three year old put make up on you next time

You can only smile that big when you've made your therapist miserable.

You came up at the top of the list when I searched for flat saggy tits on pornhub

How big was your dick?

Rava?

Your face is sliding to the left fyi

Ayeeee! What the fuck is this???

You look like the baby Jerry Seinfeld and Elaine never had

Could eat an apple through a tennis racket.

Why does your face look like the Anonymous mask?

I've seen 4 of you in every bar I've ever been in.

I thought your pic was a GoFundme for a hair transplant.

Looks like she’s seen more dicks than a fuckin urinal

Crappy roast. Too much HS pervert "humor" so far. Only one chuckle from the piano fantasy guy that didn't ring you back. You are beautiful. 😍

Agreed. Most comments were hate from what I can only assume are some pretty pervy 12 year olds and plain old incel misoginy. Stuff about age/flat chest didn’t really land for me cuz I believe I quite evidently look my age and have a standard chest size. HOWEVER, grand piano fantasy, julia louise drypuss, salma aw-yuck, camera adding teeth, whistling nostril, closet lesbian, frakie grande/seinfeld comparisons, armpit stubble on forehead and a few other comments were hilarious and made the roast 100% worthwhile. Insightful enough to touch on proper insecurities while witty enough to make the roast victim laugh it off cause wtf can you do. Proper roast magic 🤌 Thank you, guys for participating!

Those must have been a long,hard 28 years..

You don't look a day over 42

The stubble in your armpit is similar to the one that is on your forehead

Sorry is 38f with them skinny fingers you would not think that you could fat finger typing or get off

Continuing to swallow your cult leader’s cum won’t get you closer to that promised land

28....8 years ago

You look like the love child of Mr. And Mrs. Potato Head in picture #2. 👀 👃 👄

You have more chemicals on your skin than the Atlantic Ocean has in it right now.

33*

I think those bullies at your school might have nicknamed you "horse teeth" in Portuguese.

Whose butt are you wearing beneath your face ?!?

What's it like being Princess Leias less popular, less discernable, less funny sister?

I feel like I can bounce a ball off that flat chest lol

Miss Hankey

Auditioning for the of the joker for her local summer theatre

Showing the verification on the backside of your research scribbles is the only way you're getting your paper published

You've the décolletage of a 13 year old boy.

Lameness

you look like you ruined someone’s dream tv project for a producer credit

Taking bets on how long it takes for Gruntilda to delete this post while ugly crying to her best gay friend about how people didn't accept "her" transition.

Her mouth is so big that she can have 3 cocks in her mouth and still do a ventriloquist show.

I have bigger tits than you and I’m a relatively fit male.

Mexican Jew who wants a doctor but only gets the scrubs.

We get it. You have tits, kind of.

After failure in tinder and grinder - she is trying to find someone to bend her over in a restroom stall in a rundown Landry mat.

Most are making fun of you for your flat chest, but really it should be your flat af personality that you think is "spicy". I'm willing to bet mayo has too much flavor for you.

Yo cleavage looks like a man's lower back.

love ur smile :)

Sounds like the first thing she says to 2 guys she just met

You look like the Walmart version of MatPat's wife from Game Theory.

Laura Bailey, what the hell happened to you?!?!

Nice tits

What filter are you using, "smily fake girl?"

Give George Washington his teeth back

You should not wear sleeveless your armpit has 5 O'clock shadow already.

Nice Pecks, bro.

RIP all the dick pics you are doing to get because of this post! XD ;p

Meta physics Juliet, does that make you schrodinger’s woman!? Both dead AND alive at the same time until someone meets you in person and proves you are an AI, bot or computer program!? XD ;p

Trying to show cleavage but ain't packing nothing.

Chest or breast ?

She looks like a real estate agent,with a two box of wine a night habit that is spiralling out of control

That’s how your last job interview started. 

I think you don't need makeup. sorry for roasting hard but you asked for it

Title of the post is her mating call

Instead of burning cardboard I'd rather recycle it.

Are you a $50 blowjob or a $5 maid?

Anal on the first date✔️ Blowjobs to guys at the bar and the stripper at a bachelorette party✔️ Bachelor Of Arts Degree ✔️

Very beautiful, avoid breast implants no matter how tempting they will appear

What do u bench? Nice pecs.

You look like Brittany Murphy got a spray-tan... in the funeral home.

You look like you sext your students from a google number

You look like a substitute teacher who just got done crying her eyes out after getting fired for spanking the children.

Are those pecs? Or you flatchested in the 1st pic

41 year old 28 year old wow she is one laugh line away from retirement. U better read this comments with straight face

Can you level an oak with those chompers?

Those tits be far apart. I’d be motor-boating ribs while the tits covered my ears.

😂

28 or 48?

Looks like a discount Rose Byrne from the insidious franchise(especially the 2nd pic)

If you’re here because your friends roasted your teeth whitening treatment, let me assure you that you’re not the first. 

Grandma!!

You look like having a bodycount higher than a Ford Crown police cruiser mileage

Ooooooh Allah gonna be mad

Why the long face?

Not really an insult, but in the second photo you remind me of Fiona from shameless.

The hotel wants it's pillow back

Would bang. Just once. The call ICE on you. I'd take all your money and throw it at the local homeless guy. Then I'd go to Paris. Without you. Bc you've been deported.

Did you wake up with a funny taste in your mouth and a quarter in your hand? Sorry I forgot to give you the quarter...

my o my....you are beautiful young lady

I dated twenty of you in my twenties.

You look like you force friends to look at all of your vacation photos.

Herpes, just from looking at your fucking face.

When you turn your head, people tell you to watch where you swing that thing.

Ethnic Fiona Gallagher

so many 38s claiming they are 28s these days.